Until Next Summer
by GojiraCipher
Summary: Explore the lives of everyone after the events of Weirdmageddon. Dipper and Mabel living back home, the Grunkles explore the mysteries of Gravity Falls, Soos in charge of the best place on earth, Pacifica growing more as a person, Wendy being bored without the dorks, and many more. (Series of one-shots canon to each other. Will have small arcs. Hints of Wendip and other ships).
1. Welcome Home

**Chapter 1:** Welcome Home

"Piedmont! All off for Piedmont!"

Dipper slowly opened his eyes to see a sign reading 'Piedmont' out the window. "Home." Dipper poked his sister. "Mabel, we're here."

Mabel mumbled to herself. "Yes I will marry you, Captain Muscle Chef."

"Mabeeeel." Dipper smiled as he shook her harder. "We're back."

Mabel opened her eyes. "We … We are?" She gazed around the empty bus that pulled into the bus station. "Well, are you ready?"

The kids sat up and took their belongings. "No, now let's go."

The kids and Waddles stepped out of the bus and walked around, looking for their beloved parents. It wasn't long before they found two adults holding a sign that reads 'Welcome Home'

"Dipper, Mabel!"

Seeing their parents in person filled the twins hearts with joy. "Mom, Dad!" Mabel rushed in and tackled the dad to the ground, which he predicted.

"OHMYGOSHMOMANDDADIMISSEDYOUSOMUCH!"

"Woah, settle down you raskle." Mabel's dad, who kept the family resemblance, gently set her down. "So I take it your fresh air in Gravity Falls did great for your young minds?"

"Oh you wouldn't believe it!" Mabel shouted. "Mark my words. Dipper and I have got to go back next summer."

"I knew you'll say that." Mrs. Pines said. A tall woman with black hair and few characteristic features of Mabel. "We're read all your letters …. Even about that second Grunkle?"

"Loooong Story." They turned their attention to their son, who hugged both of them. "It's great to see you again."

They all shared a traditional family hug. Until the parents noticed Waddles.

"…..Riiiiiiiiiight." Mrs. Pines took a deep breath. "We've already looked up everything about pigs. I think we'll be O.K. with him."

Mabel pressed her cheeks together with glee, causing them to have a gentle laugh.

"Hey Dipper, where'd you get the lumberjack hat?" Dipper paused when his dad asked. "Heard you lost the first cap and got a blue and white one with a pine tree on it."

"Oh this?" Dipper jester to the hat Wendy gave him. "Well it's a goodbye gift from … from…"

"A Giiiiiiirrrrrrrllllllllllllllll!"

Mr. and Mrs. Pines gasped playfully, causing Dipper to panic.

"Mabel, shut up about Wendy!"

"Wendy, eh?"

Dipper froze again. "Well she's technically a teen. I'm too old for her, I mean she's too young for Wendy, I mean."

"Teen?" Mrs. Pines asked. "Wait, I remember her. Mabel mentioned a Wendy. Tall, red hair, and freckles." She leaned down to Dipper, giving him an 'I'm embarrassing you for fun' look. "Super awesome."

Dipper pulled the hat down to block his face.

"You're growing up." His father patted him on the head. "Come on, we have dinner planned already."

They loaded all of the kids' luggage into the car and drove off. During the ride, Mabel and Dipper looked around the familiar landmarks such as the park, school, mall, and even a broken stop sign that Mabel named Bob.

Seeing their suburban home for after almost three months made the kids feel right at home, yet still different than how they feel in Gravity Falls. Mabel rushed out and immediately rolled in the grass with Waddles. "Get used to this, Waddles. This is your new home."

The parents opened the doors and the kids looked around. Same old furniture, same old walls, same old smell. All giving off a welcome aura.

The kids dropped their bags and sat on the couch. "Wow, just wow." Dipper made himself comfortable as he gazed around the room. Then a familiar looking cat walked by.

"Snake Eyes!" Mabel hopped off and hugged the cat. "I forgot you existed! I wonder why?"

Snake Eyes then noticed Waddles. The two animals circled around each other, ready to attack.

"No no no!" Mabel's worries died when Waddles just lay down and Snake Eyes gently sat on top of him and the two took a nap together. "Awwwwww." Mabel snapped a picture and placed it in her photo album. "Can't wait to make more memories of the future!"

"Hey, did you get any good pictures from Gravity Falls?" Their parents sat next to them and their kids were very happy to tell them all their adventures, minus the dangerous paranormal stuff. They all laughed at some moments like when Soos got caught in a manhole, Stan chasing after money, and Manly Dan eating a rock.

After looking through Mabel's Summer Romance fails (which Mr. Pines wasn't a fan of), Mrs. Pines noticed a picture of someone that looks like Grunkle Stanford, but different. "Weird, your uncle looks different in this photo. As if he could be a twwwwwwiiiiii-" Mrs. Pines trailed off when she and Mr. Pines noticed two Stans in one photo.

"See, I told you!" Mabel smiled as Dipper looked worried.

"Heh, it's a reeeeeaaally long story." Dipper softly laughed, hoping for the best.

Their parents gave each other one long confused look, trying to wrap their heads in all of this. "I …. I think I'll give Uncle Stan a call about this." Mr. Pines sat up and walked to the nearest phone.

The twins and Mrs. Pines listened carefully as Mr. Pines spoke.

"Hi Uncle Stan …. Yes they got here safely ….. yeah, we're O.K. with Waddles. I just want to ask you about this second uncle of mine …. You're not Stanford? You're Stanley? And he's Stanford ….. Put him on line please … Uncle Stanford?"

The conversation went on and on as Mr. Pines asked about the portal, Stanford's research, and his grandparents.

"Grandpa threw him out just like that? Wow …. But you two are on good grounds, right? ….. That's nice to hear ….. really? Well I'll call you later …. Yeah, that's a good idea. Bye Uncle Ford, bye Uncle Stan."

Mr. Pines turned to his family. "Well I just learned a deep secret to my family. I think I'll stare at wall and rethink everything."

"He told you about the paranormal stuff?" Mabel asked, which she received odd stares from her parents, and a furious one from Dipper.

"If you mean that portal, then yes."

"That Portal?!" Mrs. Pines shook her head. "Kids, why don't you check out your rooms, we'll start dinner and talk about this privately."

Feeling that anything they might mention could ruin their chances of returning to Gravity Falls, the twins picked up their things and head toward their individual room.

Mabel looked around her over-the-top Mabel room. With arts and crafts on one side, posters of cute animals and boys, along with a bed with stuffed animals around. She smiled and greeted all her stuffed animals and buttons lying around. She jumped onto her bed and forgotten how soft it was.

Waddles and Snake Eyes walked in and jumped right on her bed.

"Come here, cuties!" She hugged the two adorable animals. "Welcome home."

Dipper was lying silently in his bed. His room was very simple looking. He did have his own book case and desk, and a few paranormal related posters were hung on his bed. He also a telescope next to a chemistry set. But nowhere near as crazy as Mabel's room.

He couldn't help but worry what his parents will say about Gravity Falls. They'll probably think this was all too crazy and all the times he almost died. He was shocked in general that no one mentioned Weirdmageddon on the news or any newspapers. He knows it was near the end of summer so tourists were dying down, but at least someone would have notice a giant dome containing the apocalypse in the middle of the forest.

He dug through his bag and took out a few photos of everyone from Gravity Falls, even one of him and Wendy.

"Kids, Dinner!"

Feeling their stomachs growling, they rushed downstairs and all sat together at the kitchen table. "Mmmm, worms and blood!" Mabel smiled at her mother's special plate of spaghetti; that she nicknamed herself.

Just the sweet smell of it made them realize just how much better cooks their parents are compared to Grunkle Stan.

Despite the wonderful dinner, the atmosphere felt quite. An awkward silent surrounds everyone until Mrs. Pines spoke.

"Kids."

Dipper and Mabel looked at them, feeling dreadful.

"Your father and I talked about both your Grunkles." Seeing the worried look on their kids, she smiled. "We won't be stopping you from going back to Gravity Falls."

The kids looked at them with disbelief. "R-really?"

"Right." Mr. Pines patted the kids head. "Grunkle Ford sounds like a nice guy. He said there's no need to worry about that portal, and we'll talk to them more about coming to Thanksgiving when they come back on their research trip. Which reminds me, we'll going to Gravity Falls for Thanksgiving!"

Dipper and Mabel jumped with joy. "Yes, yes! You hear that Grenda and Candy. I will be back next summer!" Mabel gasped. "And Thanksgiving too! I have to find the best recipes."

Dipper was just as happy as his crazy sister was. "For a moment I thought you wouldn't let us go back! I can still hang out with Grunkle Ford and learn his research, hang out with Soos, and spend time with Wendy."

"Of course you'll say that." Mabel boop Dipper's nose. "We are getting a girlfriend at school. One your own age!"

Everyone laughed together as they enjoyed dessert and talked more about Gravity Falls.

Bedtime finally arrived and Mabel was tucked in her own bed. She said good night to all her plushies, to Waddles and Snake Eyes; and finally, "Good night, Dipper!"

Hearing no response, Mabel realized they weren't sharing a room any longer. "Right….."

A knock was heard and in came Dipper with a sleeping bag. "Mabel, wanna have a sleepover?"

Mabel smiled brightly. "I got the mini-golf set!"

The two enjoyed the night playing golf in their own home. After everything that happened in Gravity Falls, they can still see a bright light into the future.

 **End**

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 **A/N: The cipher have been added recently as of 1/18/17. Instead of Three Letters Back, they will be Three Letters Forward. More will be on the way.**

 **Heads up, not all chapters are gonna be happy.**


	2. Two Teens Down

**Chapter 2:** Two Teens Down

Seeing the bus driving off with what was without a doubt the best thing to have happened to the sleepy town in the forest, the small goodbye party slowly stopped their waves.

"Well, there they go." Stanley Pines said. He looked at his new sweater and held back a few tears. "I guess I'll see you all tomorrow." He smiled at Soos and wrapped an arm around his neck. "I gotta teach this guy how to be the best darn con-artist and business man he can be!"

Soos wrapped the old man with his big arms. "I won't fail you, Mr. Pines! But the Good Book forbids con-arting."

"Never heard of it."

Ford lightly laughed. "And I have to prepare my expedition to the ocean. I'll be down in the lab if you need me."

"And we must prepare for school this Monday." Candy said as Grenda nodded.

"We need all the pencils we can get!" shouted Grenda. "Mabel left enough notebooks! Let's get them now."

"Oh no…" Wendy's pupils shrank. "School's Monday. And I haven't slept enough from the end of the world … It's on a Monday!" She felt dazed and stumbled a bit. "I think … I think I'm gonna hurl."

"Wendy! Wendy! Wendy!"

Shouted Wendy's friends who just came in, hoping to see Wendy puke party style.

"… Did we miss them?" Thompson asked as the others looked around.

"Yeah …. Where the heck were you guys?" Wendy's mind slowly turned to normal, irritated they weren't here for the Twins goodbye.

"We stop to get some awesome pics for NoLifeBook." Tambry showed several images of mystical creatures on her phone.

"We are gonna get so much likes!" Robbie shouted. "All by this little devil of my."

"Aw, Robbiekins."

The rest of them acted disgusted when the couple rubbed noses.

"I dodged a bullet on that one." Nate said, right before Lee punched him in the arm.

"You would be doing the same thing, man!" Lee said as the two wrestled each other.

Robbie soon realized that the Twins were gone. "Well it's actually a bummer. Mabel did get us together." He held Tambry gently. "Dipper ….. yeah. I mean he ruined my thing with Wendy, but now I'm more …happy? With Tambry by my side…. The word's happy, Right?"

Tambry actually had to search the word 'happy' online to confirm it. "Yep."

"Kids these days." Stan sighed. "You're never gonna get arms these big with just fingers!"

Robbie rubbed his chin. "So should I be apologizing to the kid?"

Wendy thought back about that night where Dipper revealed the secret message in Robbie's song, which Robbie admitted he didn't really write it at all. She also quickly remembered Dipper pushing her without realizing what he was doing, but she did forgive him the next day.

"Robbie, I was meaning to ask you. Since you didn't write that song, where did you get it from?"

Robbie scratched his head, regretting that moment. "I think I told you. I ripped it off from some other band online."

"Well that can be considered foreshadowing." Ford pondered. "But not today!"

"Shoot!" Robbie shouted. "I should have said that to the God of Death after surviving that Dollar Bill guy."

Nate and Lee stopped their little game. "Yeah, if it weren't for you guys, we would still be statues. This place is gonna really stink now that Mabel and Dr. Fun Times are gone." Nate said.

"I think it already stinks!" said Lee. "I say we make this place more awesome by having those fairy tale guys come visit us more often. That will make life awesome-er until next Summer."

"Reeeally bad idea." Ford said. "There are countless of unidentified creatures in Gravity Falls. They can have the ability to destroy us in seconds."

"Oh booooo!" shouted the teens.

"We'll show you Mr. Other Pines." shouted Thompson.

"Yeah, Thompson. You get some new monster friends." said Nate.

"Thompson,Thompson, Thompson!"

"Hold on guys." Wendy spoke. "I think we should take it easy. School's this Monday."

The teens froze from those words. "….S….s….sch…..school?!"

"ON MONDAY!?" Thompson held his legs close and rocked himself. "Can't take this anymore. Can't take this anymore!"

"Actually, there is something cool about this." Wendy said. "I just helped save the world from a demon. I'll probably be like the boss of all the other teens!"

"But Wendy, you're already the most popular girl in school." Tambry said. "You practically dated every guy."

"Right, and I'm so glad I'm not the snooty stereotype." Wendy swiped some fake sweat off her forehead. "My point is that no one will hate us … by highschool standards."

"Yeah." Robbie cracked his knuckles. "And if anyone tries messing with us, they'll have another thing coming."

"Dude, no offense." Wendy said. "But you've never won in a fight. Once."

Robbie looked at his arms. "Well I guess I have to pump some more iron."

"I'll support that." Tambry said as they all shared a laugh, which died down quickly by the bleak reminder of school.

"I think we're going back home and hope school doesn't suck." Wendy said as the teens left. "And don't forget to give me Dipper and Mabel's emails when they sent them."

As they head back, Lee noticed a slight different in Wendy's wardrobe. "Are you wearing Dipper's hat?"

Wendy checked her new cap. "Yep, I swapped hats with Dipper before they left. Something to remember me by."

"Awwwww!"

The teens looked to their side to see some Gnomes gushing. "…..would any of you two fine women want to be our Gnome Queen?"

Robbie then kicked one of them like a football, which scattered the rest in fear.

"That's my man!" Tambry pecked Robbie on the cheek. She looked back at Wendy observing Dipper's hat. "You know, you spend a lot of time with Dipper this summer. More than with us."

Wendy smiled. "Why not? He's practically like my best friend."

"That had a crush on you." Robbie said, which caused the others to snicker.

"Oooooow. Doctor Fun Times has the hots for Wendy!" Nate joked around.

"Guys." Wendy blushed. "I know that, but he's still awesome. Besides, after he accidently confessed out loud, I let him down easily. Hurting his feelings is the last thing I want to do." Wendy chuckled. "Last I heard about him and girls, he took Stan's advice on flirting. Didn't work out well."

"Tsk Tsk." Nate said. "He should have asked us for advice."

"But we only know how to date teenagers our age, Nate." Lee said. "Too bad Dipper and Mabel weren't our age. We could have had more teenage action with huge consequences." The two high-fived each other as Tambry thought of something.

"Hey Wendy. If Dipper was the same age as you, would you date him?"

Wendy froze in her track. Her face turned pink as everyone eagerly looked at her. "Uhhhhh ….. hey look! A gremlin, goblin thing!" Wendy pointed at a Gremloblin, looking at a photo of another Gremloblin wearing glasses. "Come on, Thompson, pet it."

"Thompson, Thompson, Thompson!"

As Thompson slowly approached the creature as everyone cheered him on, Wendy stepped back and stared deeply upon Dipper's hat, with all the small patches that were sowed from all the adventures he shared with everyone, including her.

"Wonder what Mabel would look like two years from now?" Nate randomly spoke.

 **End of Chapter**

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	3. The New Man of Mystery

**Chapter 3:** The New Man of Mystery

"Welcome to the Mystery Shack!" Stanley Pines posed at all the attractions. "Home of mysteries and excitement! Would you dare enter and explore the vast exhibits of this alluring and paranormal town?"

"Uh, Mr. Pines. I already work here." Soos spoke as Ford made his way to the house.

"Yes! I knew that." Stanley showed Soos to his office. "Now we only have a week until Dexter and I leave for adventure. So I'm turning you into a younger version of me. A clear criminal record of me."

Soos squealed to himself. "What's the first lesson?"

Stan took out some charts. "Just to get this out of the way. I'll teach you all the math that no one realizes an employer does. Which if they do know about, employees will complain less to their bosses about money. Now lesson one."

…

 **Hours later**

"Wow. Did not expect you to master that kind of math this fast." Stan looked at a perfect calculation of profits, spends, losses, etc.

"I've been studying business management for years." Soos said.

"Impressive." Stan smiled, feeling proud for Soos. "Well that takes care of the boring parts." Stan toss the sheets away. "Now the next step is-"

The phone suddenly rang.

"Oh, hold on." Stan quickly answered. "Hello, Mystery Shack! … Oh, hey nephew of mine who has a name. Did the kids get home safe? ….. Are you good with the pig? … Great! Mabel really love that pig …. Yeah. The Second uncle. Well to tell you the truth I'm not really Stanford. That will be my brother who was sucked into a portal for thirty years because we were fighting like children. I'm Stanley. … It's complicated….. Hey Ford, get over here! You have to explain a lot to the kids' dad!"

Ford picked up the phone to explain the whole situation to Mr. Pines.

"Soos, I'll get back to you later. I have to tell that story again."

So Soos went to the gift shop to wait of Stanley. As he waits, he looked around the store, coming up with ideas. "If I was a postcard stand; I should be happier here. But those bobble heads are always bobbleing. But it's closer to the snow globes who always give people the Christmas spirit. Which will annoy a lot of people in November."

Stanely returned after a long conversation. "That went off without a hitch." Stanley explained to Soos that the kids' parents now know about what happened 30 years ago and like Stanford very much. "So glad that Stanford's more honest than I am, we may never see the kids here again."

Soos almost had a heart attack.

"Settle down, Soos. Time to learn the art of con!" Stan rubbed his hands together. "But since there's no suckers at this time, we'll just make one!"

…

Ford sat there, very annoyed with his 'sucker lollipop' t-shirt.

"Remember, be as dumb as possible!" Stan said to his non-amused brother.

Soos approached him, feeling very nervous. "Uhhh. Hello money?"

Ford sighed. "Hello, Mr. Mystery. I would like to see your 'real' attractions." Ford bended his fingers. "Because they definitely don't look like stuffed dead animals glued together. Or my old bowling ball painted to look like an eyeball without being preserved in any embalming chemicals!"

"Psst, scam him." Stan whispered.

"Uhh, O.K." Soos gulped. He looked around the museum he worked at for years and was filled with determination. "Heh, just like that kid and that skeleton who likes spaghetti, I mean um. Be amazed!" Soos pulled in a very real looking replica of Multi-Bear. "Behold! The beast that took years to fight to the death, and whos dead boty is said to be haunted, the abominable Bear-Bear!"

"I'm still alive, thank you very much." Multi-Bear spoke. "I just forgot my mix tape here."

"There there, Bear-Bear." Soos patted Multi-Bear on one of his heads. "…Why did I say that?"

Ford shook his head. "You know, I can actually get real attractions. But that will bring in some unwanted guests from the government."

"I won't do that either, bro." Stan said, reminding him of how dangerous the supernatural can be. "Soos. you're doing good!" Stan patted him on the back. "Now let's see you try introducing every attraction here."

"From the Alpha Apple all the way through the Zigzag Zebra Zombie? And also miscellaneous like whatever Mabel made here." Soos took out a model of …. "Definitely a model." Soos then sprung an idea. "Heh, what if Mabel made a wish for this to come alive? Like when she found that old genie lamp."

(Flashback)

"First wish, Ice cream! Second wish, Ice cream! Third wish, …. Nothing!" Mabel shouted with the lamp in her hand, belonging to the ….. red parrot?

"Get it?" Mabel asked. She grinned widely, waiting for an answer. "It's cameo? A cameo from a famous movie made in the nineties? ….. Had two straight to video movies which one of them was terrible …. And an animated series …. And crossed over with Hercules …. Yes that actually happened. Look it up!"

(End)

Stan hugged Soos. "You're a natural!" A tear drop formed in one of his eyes. "Now to show you how to increase prices and-"

"Jesus Alzamirano Ramírez!"

Everyone gasped as Soos's Abuelita walked in, looking furious. "I hope you're not being a bad boy here."

Soos started panicking. "No, I mean. Don't put me in time out!"

Stanley grunted painfully. "Soos, you don't have to take her advice! You're Mr. Mystery now."

"Oh I can smell a con-artist a mile away." Abuelita poked Stanley in the chest. "And don't get me started on that day where you got the Mystery Shack back from that awful child."

"Awful child? I don't know what you're oooooooooh." Stanley froze as everyone looked at him. Even Stanford gave him a curious look. "Uhh, distraction!" Stan pointed at Gompers the Goat.

The next thing Soos knew, Stan was caught in the powerful grip of Abuelita before he could escape. "Why the heck are you this strong?"

"Soos. You can be the best Mr. Mystery and be a professional business man. But you must make a choice. Will you be a crook, or an honest man?"

"Don't listen to her!" shouted Stan. "I don't care if you won't scam people, money wise! Just as long as you follow your dream and make smart business choices ….. wait. That's sort of what you just said." He turned to Soos. "And I also said I wanted you to have no criminal records. ….. So we're all good?"

"Supongo que sí." Abuelita let him go.

"Well that was another conflict solved." Soos said before the phone rang. "I'll get that."

When he left, Abuelita spoke to Stan. "Just of the record. You are still a better father figure than his good for nothing blood-father who wants nothing to do with him."

"Father figure?" A flashback of that fateful night played in Stan's head. "Yeah, I guess I am. Take that, dad!"

"I am not your father." Abuelita protested.

…

"Really, a fire!?" Soos asked through the phone. "And also the place you work at went out of business?"

"That's right. But at least I was insured." Soos was talking to Melody, Soos's girlfriend from Portland, on the other line. "But now I need to find a job that doesn't require a college degree and a new apartment. Unfortunately I can't find an open one here. Everyone else living in my building took all the open rooms."

"That's a bummer." Soos said.

"Well enough about me, what have you been up to. I couldn't get in contact with you for a week. What happened, did Armageddon happen?" she laughed.

"Actually Weirdmageddon happened."

"…. Another overpowered entity bent on fulfilling its unholy desires?"

"Exactly that."

They spend the next thirty minutes talking about Bill's control over Gravity Falls, how he was defeated, the twins leaving, and Soos's biggest surprise.

"I am now the new Mr. Mystery!"

"Congratulations!" Melody cheered. "Wish I could move up there to see you in action …. Hey. Is there an open house there?"

Soos realize what she means and gasped happily. "Well minus my old small house and that spooky medium sized mansion the Northwest moved in, there's one good house for rent near where Mabel's friends live. And heck, with me as Mr. Mystery and Stan heading out for adventure, I could use another hand."

"Really?" Melody spoke happily.

"Yeah. You can work the cash register and sell merchandise to all our customers who would have their minds blown by my stories!"

"I'll take that job. But won't I need to submit my application first?"

"Of course ….. you're hired."

"Oh thank you, Soos. You're the best!"

Soos's cheek turned pink. "Thanks Melody. You are gonna love it here. I'll contact the owner of that house first thing in the morning. Well after breakfast."

After they gave their goodbyes and hung up, Stanley walked right in. "Well looks like Ford and I will spend rest of the week getting ready. You sure you got this under control?"

Soos informed Stan that Melody will be moving in, he can totally do it. "Yes, Mr. Pines. You can count Soos."

"Thanks, Soos. That really means a lot."

Soos smiled. "Permission to hug you again?"

"Like you'll stop if I say no."

Soos hugged Stanley tightly as Stanley hugged back.

" _Soos really is like the son I never had._ " Stan thought to himself. " _Wonder whatever happened to his real dad. Probably got on the wrong side of some shady people. Oh well._ " The two enjoyed their bonding moment for as long as they wanted, fulfilling the old tradition of father passing down to his son who shall pass it down to their son and so forth till the end of time.

* * *

"PLEASE LET ME GO!" shouted a man that sort of resembles Soos by only a tiny pit. He was tied up in an area with small structures, green pathways, and holes.

"NEVER!" shouted the little golf-ball like creatures, the Lilliputtians.

"Do not lose hope, my comrade." said the man's fellow inmate, Sergei. "You've battle your slavery against these creatures far longer than I have."

"I just snuck in here five minutes ago to hide from the cops!" shouted the man. "And my only crimes are ….. well I know its three times bigger than that one guy who ran for mayor …..Steve Oak? Eh, some loser."

All of the Lilliputtians gasped. "He has insulted our once great chief, who had destroyed the One Eye Beast! Burn his most vulnerable area while we sing!"

 **End of Chapter**

 **F pqxoqba qeb cfob.**


	4. The Slayer of Summer

**Chapter 4:** The Slayer of Summer

School….

Within the halls of 'Eggbert Middle School', all the kids chat, walked to homeroom, and organized their lockers. However this no true ever day routine, at least not yet.

For these kids, it was the death of their summer and the beginning of school. Some just started Middle School and felt nervous and lost, some older ones are more familiar to others, but yet even in the upcoming age of High school brought fear and anxiety to the eldest students.

Today felt like the Great Depression to many young minds, until a powerful kick to the main entrance revealed the glimmering hope to all their lives.

"MA-BELLLLL'S Back!"

The weariness of everyone's souls suffered their second death as they all cheered for their savior.

"Mabel's back! Mabel's back! OMG!" shouted a girl.

"I'm …. I'm finally back in the same school as Mabel!" shouted a younger boy who started shedding tears of joy.

One speechless kid dressed in blue overreacted so much that he started foaming in the mouth and collapsed.

A group of kids ran up to her and Mabel greeted each and everyone one by name. "Dave, Cindy, Joe, Frank, Chloe, Timmy, Steven, Connie, and good old janitor!"

All the kids pestered her about how her summer was deep in the woods like she was going to bring the good word.

"Oh Gravity Falls is amazing! I found my two most bestest friends in the whole world! Fought monsters and ghosts! Traveled through time! Saved my pet pig from a pterodactyl. Got turned into wood by a vengeful lumberjack ghost. Had a video game character say some lines. Met a Love God. Uncovered my Great Uncle's greatest secret! And saved the world from a floating cyclops pyramid monster!"

No one, and I really mean NO ONE, questioned Mabel. They literally accepted everything as fact.

"And I couldn't have done it without my brother!" Mabel pulled Dipper in front of her, looking nervous. The group's energy suddenly died down.

"Who's he?" one person asked.

"Come on, Drake. You know me from band class!" shouted Dipper.

No one gave another comment.

"O.K. … I'll see you all at Homeroom with me and Dipper ….. WAIT!" Mabel rushed to the notice board to see if she's in the same homeroom with Dipper. "Good, we're together. And also some classes and lunch. O O, I see we have a new student!" Mabel looked at the unfamiliar name closely. "Oh, he's a Native American!"

"Aren't they called Indians?" asked on kid, who received an awful glare from Mabel. "Does this look like India?"

The kids quickly bowed down to her, apologizing in a panic.

"Good!" Mabel smiled.

The twins walked on over to their old lockers right next to each other.

Mabel empty out her backpack and covered her locker walls with photos of Grenda and Candy, and of course Waddles. "I forgot how much everyone misses me. Now fit in here, Waddles."

"Squee?"

"Yeah, they sure did." Dipper placed a photo of him and Wendy on the inside of locker door. "Not the same with me though."

"Oh don't be like that, bro-bro." Mabel said calmly. "Look, here comes some kids with that game you like, Homework the Game!"

Dipper turned to see three walking geek stereotypes heading his way. "Hey, hey! I like Dungeons, Dungeons, and More Dungeons too!"

The geeks walked passed him with an accelerating pace.

"I really don't get it." Dipper shook his head. "How come you're over popular and I never made a friend ever? Not even those guys who were in all our classed in Elementary school."

"Don't be like that." Mabel smiled. "You made friends during the summer like Soos, Nate, Lee, Thompson, Pacifica, Multi-Bear, and this girl right here." Mabel grinned as she pointed at the photo of Wendy.

"Yeah, you're right." Dipper felt a little better.

"And let's not forget that revenge trip." Mabel folded her arms. "It's still a shame you were flirting with all those girls, but you did actually get their emails."

"Yeah …. Yeah!" Dipper pounded his palm. "I'd never been more open in my life."

"Bingo, we have a winner!" Mabel booped his nose. "You spend too much time with books and being awkward. It's time you fight back and be more courageous, just don't use too much of Grunkle Stan's advice."

"Trust me, I won't." Dipper felt his arms, regretting that time. "But I learned a lot after that, and from this crazy Summer."

A new light shined in the horizon. "This is the school year were I become popular. Or at least make at least one or two friends after today!"

"That's the spirit!" Mabel gleed, only to gasp loudly. "Hold it, I bet there must be someone interested in the paranormal. You can have another Paranormal Investigator buddy!"

"Worth a shot." The two twins bounded fists.

"I'll see you at Homeroom!" Mabel shut her locker and grabbed her books.

"Be right there, Mabel." After Dipper took his books, he looked back at the photo of him and Wendy. "Wish me luck, Wendy."

"And now you're talking to photos. Huh, dork."

A chill ran down his spine, not out of fear, but annoyance. "Good to see you too, Beethoven." Dipper turned to see a familiar looking chubby kid wearing a black t-shirt with an image of a bulldog and the words 'Slight Fear'. Next to him, he was the class loser back at Eggbert Elementary, but now … he's just an annoying wannabe bully.

"So Dipstick. You got my milk money?"

Dipper painfully sighed. "You know I bring my lunch and drink every day, and you're allergic to peanut butter and bananas. Remember that time you swiped my sandwich and ate it whole in a split second?"

"Oh yeah … well … your birthmark is stupid."

"You don't remember what it looks like."

Beethoven shifted is eyes, thinking quickly on what to do. "Well … I'll just take your dumb hat and-" before he could even lay one finger on it, Dipper grabbed his wrist with a surprisingly amount of strength. He quivered as he looked directly into Dipper's furious eyes.

"Do not …" Dipper moved in closer, making the boy sweat in fear. "Touch her hat."

Beethoven swallowed and tried acting tough. "I … I bet you got this from an ugly girl." He then noticed the picture on the locker door. "Yeah, look how …wait. She's the exact opposite." Beethoven just stares at the photo of him and Wendy as Dipper let go. "Who the heck is she?"

"That's my best friend." Dipper clenched his fist, and then came into realization of that moment. "How hard was I squeezing your wrist?"

"Hard. Actually hard." Beethoven rubbed his wrist. "What happened that summer?"

Dipper was looked bewildered by his hand. "A lot actually …. A lot." Dipper took a deep breath. "Look, I know for a fact you won't actually hurt me."

"Oh yeah … why's that?" he asked, trying to keep his appearance.

"Because you're crazy about my sister."

Beethoven gasped loudly. "I mean oh no. I can punch you into next Tuesday. Ruby Tuesday!"

"Dipper! Dipper!"

Beethoven froze from hearing that voice. He stood straight up when Mabel came into the scene. "You got to get to homeroom! This is something you want to see!"

She grabbed his hand and pulled him away after he shut his locker and picked up his book.

Beethoven released his breath and sighed like a lovesick fool. "Mabel, so full of life and the not boring …boring is the enemy!" Beethoven straighten himself up in a determination pose. "This year …. This is the year I impress her enough to …. wait. She's been gone to a forest town all summer with-" He gasped loudly. "Boys with real muscles!" He looked at his chubby arms. "No, I must not give up until …. I'm I late for homeroom?"

…

Mabel pulled his brother right into their homeroom and pressed his face on the window. "Do you see that?"

Dipper opened his eyes and gazed outside. "A red fox?" Dipper looked at a red fox chasing a rabbit around a circle.

"No silly. Him!" Mabel pointed a few desks down. "Oh, sorry." Mabel released Dipper's head so he could properly turn his head. He looked to see a Native American boy talking to a few kids. "His name is Dyami, and he's starting his very own Paranormal Club!"

"Really?" Dipper felt like this was destiny. A friend with his interests, and even if the D,D, and More D kids won't accept him, Dipper at least experienced the Paranormal first hand.

"We should totally give him my cellphone number!"

Dipper stopped himself. "Another crush, Mabel?"

"Surprised?" Mabel sarcastically asked.

"Mabel has a what-now?" Beethoven ran right in and tripped on his own shoe lases. "I'll pummel anyone who laughs that isn't Mabel."

Mabel hugged Dipper. "Just imagen it. Us, taking down the paranormal right here at home and Dyami with my cellphone number."

"Mabel, we don't have cellphones." Her brother reminded her.

"One step at a time." Mabel giggled and ran ahead with Dipper knowing well enough how it will play out.

The boy, Dyami, was speaking to a goth looking girl with black hair and small classes. "What the club I would begin includes talking and learning about many mythos around the globe. We also do creepypastas.

"How does that taste?" asked the goth girl.

Dyami gave her an odd look, but then noticed Mabel taking a seat right in front of him. "Hi! The name's Mabel. The, as of a few days ago, thirteen year old TEENAGER!"

Dyami took the sudden introduction as a bit weird, but welcomed it. "Thirteen? Do you feel like a teenager yet?"

"Meh. But that's beside the point." She pulled Dipper to her. "Me and my brother want in."

"Me too!" Beethoven shouted. "Because I'm a huge fan … of what Mabel's a fan of."

Dyami looked at each one carefully. "You seem all enthusiastic as a two warriors crashing in a duel, or that fox outside."

They turned to see the fox with a successful meal.

"Poor bunny." Mabel moped. "Any-who. Me and Dipper are known as Mystery Twins back at the greatest place in the universe, Gravity Falls."

"Gravity Falls?" Dyami looked at Mabel and Dipper with wide open eyes. "I've been there this summer!"

"Really?!" Mabel leaned on the desk. "Noticed anyone beautiful?"

"No." Dyami smiled and took a photo from his pocket. "But I've seen this!" Dipper looked at the photo and was amazed.

"Is this …. Bigfoot!?"

"It has to be!" Dyami said with excitement. "I wanted to get another one, but my parents just thought it was a fake and instead took me to the most pointless tourist trap I was forced to lay eyes on."

"The Mystery Shack?"

"Yes." Dyami turned away dramatically. "You won't imagine the place. Horrific, misleading, and the man behind all of it. The dreadful Mr. Mystery." Dyami slapped his head. "I mean how does a horrible man scam so many-"

"Hey!" both twins shouted. "That will be our Great Uncle."

Dyami was about to apologize, but Beethoven picked him up. "How do you want him? Scrambled or … not scrambled?"

Dyami glared at Beethoven right in the eye. "I must warn you, I've studied multiple martial art skills. Your peasant strength is nothing compared to my shining might."

"I forgive him already!" Mabel smiled. "Say more words!"

Beethoven lowered the boy and Dipper started a conversation. "You know, I've come up with theories about Bigfoot. Why no one ever found a body? They're cannibals. Where do they hide? Tunnels. Why nobody one found one? They didn't call his name."

As Dipper went on and on about his theories, Dyami was having a hard time keeping up. Near the end of Dipper's theories the boy started feeling dizzy. "Wait wait, who married Bigfoot?" Dyami sat down. "O.K. I see you're more than compassion for the paranormal then I am. Either that or I just feel a loss of energy."

Dipper sheepishly smiled. "Sorry, it's just that that Bigfoot is the tip of the iceberg in Gravity Falls. You should see the Mini-Golf course with-"

"Wait!" Dyami stood up. "The Lilliputtians?"

The disbelief Dipper just dropped his jaw. "You know them? Like the pirates, the knights, the miners?"

Dyami was about to speak, but then the teacher came in.

"Oh no. I forgot we were in school." Mabel moped as the four kids took a seat.

"We'll talk after school." Dyami told Dipper with a thumb up.

"You got it." Dipper tipped his hat to his new friend.

"What just happened?" asked Beethoven.

The rest of the school day went on as you expected. Mabel and Beethoven looked bored as ever, but Mabel felt more comfortable when all the students socialized with her. Dipper on the other hand was thrilled by what he'll learn throughout the new school year. And Dyami, he was actually pretty average about everything, not too thrill about school work but was interested in a few topics and got along pretty well with other kids; especially after he learned that since Mabel is friendly towards him, any kid who picks on him will be placed on the 'Mabel's Enemies' list, which Mabel herself wasn't aware of.

And the Pines Twins will continue their daily routine throughout the year. Their summer have truly ended that day, but was not the end of their lives. New adventures and changes are in the future, and the Mystery Twins and two new allies will face them head on.

 **End of Chapter**

 **Ybbqelsbk tofqbp mlbjp xylrq Jxybi qexq xob efixoflrpiv yxa.**

* * *

 **Yes, this is when I'll be adding in Original Characters. Please share your thoughts with me.**

 **Beethoven:** In case you're wondering, this is the same boy seen in one of the flashbacks in 'Weirdmageddon Part 2'. I thought I give this character some more light and personality since he seems as unpopular as Dipper. Also I named him myself. I was going for someone like Buford in 'Phineas and Ferb' with a poetic affection for Mabel and a bit delusional of his social statue. Just think of a pit of Helga G. Pataki and smaller bit of Zim mixed together with Buford.

 **Dyami** : He's completely original and enjoys the paranormal as much as Dipper. But will not share any interest in some of Dipper's other hobbies. He mostly active and enjoys the outdoors. However he does sometimes express his vocabulary in an adventurous hero way, which Mabel adores. Also Dyami is translated to Eagle.

 **And thank you all for over 1,500 views!**


	5. Missing You

**Chapter 5:** Missing You

"Heeeeeellllp! Heeeeeellllllllp!" Deep within a dark and foggy forest, a beautiful woman was running for her life. She didn't know what it was or what it wants, but she knows deep down that whatever it is, it wasn't good.

She ran up to an old shack and banged on the door repeatedly. "Help me, Help me! I might be dinner!"

However it was too late, a dark shadow cast over her. She dropped to her knees and screamed at the horrific abomination in front of her ….. a pile of mud with google eyes!

* * *

Two bursts of laughter filled a room with a T.V. showing the woman being eaten by the mud monster's mouth that resembles a tent's door.

Wendy Corduroy and Dipper Pines were in the lumberjack girl's bedroom for this usual movie marathon before the summer's end.

"I … I can't …" Dipper tried to make a wise crack at the film, but the horrific cheesiness and lazy effects were too much for the boy.

Wendy laughed even harder when she looked at Dipper's face from trying to speak.

They fell back onto the bed and laughed for at least ten minutes before dying down.

"Wow. I've seen some lazy old costumes in these dumb films." Wendy spoke. "But that! That's like the worst thing I ever saw."

"Just to think if that was passed off as a film school project." Dipper held his chest to ease his breath. "I won't give it an F, that's for sure."

"I'll give it a G minus." Wendy laughed. "G for Give up, Now."

Dipper snickered. "I guess this means that all politicians are straight G students."

"Dude, do you know anything about politics?" Wendy sternly asked.

"Well uh. No." Dipper quickly calmed down, hoping he didn't hit a nerve.

"Neither do I." Wendy playfully punched Dipper's arm the lightest she could, which still hurt him. "And believe me. If anyone's a straight G student, it's me."

Dipper looked at her with disbelief. "Don't be like that. I'm sure you're doing fine."

"Thanks for the support." Wendy said with a soft smile. "But really, I stink at school. Besides gym, I always barely pass my classes." Wendy chuckled to herself. "One time in history class, I had a test with a question 'Who started World War II' and out of boredom I accidently bubbled in Walt Disney."

"Woooow!" Dipper laughed. "Usually when it comes to school I always get straight A's, minus gym." Dipper smiled with slight embarrassment.

"Oh I wish I have your brains, man. No teachers yelling at me, Dad won't get angry a lot, and I'll have free time from detention."

"You, in detention?" Dipper sarcastically asked. "So what's on your criminal record?"

"One, low grades. Two, late for school because driving here is stupidly the worst. Three, I may have something to do with a hacked radio attached to the speakers. And four, my teachers hate me."

"Who can possibly hate you?" Dipper joked, but really felt confused.

Wendy playfully laughed. "That's just high school. I already told your sister how your body goes against you and how everyone hates you."

"Really?" Dipper felt the back of his neck. "I'll be there a year from now. Got any advice?"

"Yes, but they're not anywhere as good as using a fountain of youth." Wendy counted down with her fingers. "Don't hang out with the wrong crowd. Don't look like an easy target. Don't be open about things people will make fun of you. Go to football games. Think about college. Babysit your brother. Remember when all your homework is due. Fix what dad breaks. Don't ever wait till the last minute. Keep all your breakable stuff in your room so your over-the-top brothers don't break it. Pray that someone can fix Thompson's car in less than a second. Beat up anyone pushing you too far. Shout 'I get it! The World's a terrible place' when they make you watch those kinds of movies. And don't get me started on…. Dude, how long was I ranting for?"

Wendy turned to her best friend and found him expressionless.

"Heh, sorry about that. There's still a lot of good stuff too."

Dipper took a huge breath. "I see now what Mabel's mind went through."

"O.K. I exaggerated on most things there." Wendy felt her head. "They've been building up here for who knows how long."

Dipper looked to Wendy. "I see why you're always stressed. I heard you talking about your family."

"Don't worry about me. When school comes, my brothers always get tired after school. Dad's still crazy, but that's when I have me time."

"To study?" Dipper asked.

"No, to do anything but work." Wendy laughed to herself, which died down rather quickly. "But yeah. I should be doing that."

"And if you're having trouble studying, you could find a tutor." Dipper suggested.

A sparkle appeared in Wendy's eyes. "A tutor, that's it!" She turned to Dipper and smiled. "You should help me study!"

"Me?" Dipper asked. "Go study with you, I mean tutor you? Well I can't say I'm that smart."

"Are you kidding me?" Wendy punched his arm again, only twice as hard. "You should be graduating by now. Remember how you were explaining chemistry to me? You made it simple enough so that I wouldn't fall asleep."

Dipper smiled at the compliment. "Thanks. You know I actually tutor Mabel myself. She's not dumb, but doesn't really study that often." Dipper became a bit sad. "Besides, even if I'm as smart as your teachers, I can't actually tutor you when school starts."

Wendy was about to ask why, but reminded herself of the end of summer. "Right. You have to go back home, the day after your birthday."

"Yeah." Dipper sighed. "At least I can spend some time with you before that." Dipper gently moved his head onto Wendy.

"Dude, are you cuddling with me?"

"WHAT?!" Dipper rolled right out of bed and landed face first on the floor. "NO NO! I wouldn't cuddle with you. I mean no offense. I would, I mean no. I mean yes. I mean-"

"Relax, Dipper. I was teasing. Now come here." Wendy pulled the boy back and the two lay together. " _Still loves me_." Wendy thought to herself. "Trust me, Dipper. You'll have better luck with dating than me."

"You really think so?" Dipper asked.

"Yeah, you have the best match maker in the world as your sister. You'll find a dream girl in no time. In fact…." Wendy moved real close to Dipper, making the boy nervous and confused. "You're dreaming right now."

"….What?"

"You fell asleep in class and now the teacher is going to drop a book on your desk."

"What …. What?!" Dipper started panicking as he paced around the room. "Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!"

Wendy laughed. "I got you again, dude!"

Dipper stopped himself and felt completely embarrassed, but the two eventually shared a heartwarming laugh together. Wendy hopped off of bed and kneeled down to him. "Come on, you think you'll fall asleep in class? I would pass out the instance I sit down in that cold chair where Robbie scribbled a muffin."

The two friends shared another laugh together, both knowing that their time together will end soon.

"Dipper." She placed her hands on his shoulders. Her happy face started to fade in the boy's eyes. "I know you're here for at least two more days. But I just wanted to say …. Thanks for everything." She pulled him in and kissed him on the cheek. "You're my best friend. I'm …. I'm going to miss you so much." Wendy started tearing as he smiled at the boy.

Dipper's entire face turned deep red. "And you'll receive detention if you don't wake up right this instant, Corduroy!"

* * *

Wendy awoke suddenly and found herself in her boring class room with the teacher standing next to her. "You had enough time to sleep at night. Now pay attention!"

All the other students laughed at the already ashamed teen. Then they all collapsed in their desks, fast asleep.

"CLASS!" shouted the teacher. "I will not have zzzzzz." The teacher dropped to the ground.

Wendy looked around and just burst out laughing at the situation. She laughed so hard that Dipper's hat fell off her head and landed on the overpowered air conditioner next to her, which blew it up into the air. Wendy was agile enough to grab it before it flew out of reach. Before placing it back on her head, she looked at the blue Pine Tree symbol, thinking of her best friend.

"Heh, already missing you."

 **End of Chapter**

 **Afmmbo fpk'q qeb lkiv lkb peb jfppbp.**


	6. My Chosen Path

**Chapter 6:** My Chosen Path

Inside Gravity Fall Middle School, both Candy and Grenda sat in homeroom, waiting for their school day to officially start. They were well prepared in paper and pencils that Mabel gave them, but that was just it. Mabel given them the best summer of their lives, but she was not able to give them the best school year.

"I miss our party girl." Candy said in a low voice.

"AAARH! I still wannna punch my heart!" Grenda shouted as she started punching her chest again.

"Don't go too far, Grenda." Candy warned her muscular friend.

"This isn't going too far. That is!" Grenda pointed to the new student sitting in front of them, some short black creatures with crooked antennas and small yellow eyes.

"Good point." Candy allowed Grenda to continue.

Their day wasn't going to get any better by the looks of it. Right next to them sat two friends of Pacifica ….. Pacifica's henchgirls.

"Well look, if it isn't geek and ugly." One girl snickered.

"Lost without Metal Mouth?" The other asked. "If only Pacifica could come here, but her family always sends her to the most luxurious school in this state. She would never want to be seen here."

Suddenly the door opened to reveal a very familiar looking blonde valley girl.

All the kids looked as their jaws dropped. Pacifica Northwest in a public school.

"Greetings." Pacifica said to the students.

"P-Pacifica?" The two girls ran up to her as Grenda and Candy listened. "What are you doing here? Your parents always send you out of city this time of year."

"Not anymore." Pacifica shook her head. "Since my dad thought it was a good idea to swear allegiance to Bill, he had to sell his mansion to that old crazy guy to keep our wealth, which it wasn't nearly as much compared to how rich we were. So now I'll be attending …. This hovel." Pacifica shivered when she noticed a centipede crawling up the wall.

"Well don't worry about that, Pacifica." One of the girl said. "We're the ones that run things around here. In fact…" She gave a devilish stare at the school 'losers'. "We were just in the middle of insulting these two."

Pacifica noticed Candy and Grenda.

"So how about you take a shot and-"

"No…"

The two looked over to their leader for the stern response. "Uhhh, Pacifica?" Pacifica gave them an unfamiliar glare.

"We're not doing that."

"Oh, well…. How about some prank and-"

"No Pranks! NO insults! No this!" The two backed away as Pacifica became more hostile. "The Pacifica you knew is dead!"

Everyone gasped. Sensing danger, Grenda body slammed Pacifica. "Don't think you can trick us!"

"Yes!" shouted Candy. "Mabel told us all about you, Shapeshifter!"

With her years of self-defense classes, Pacifica poked a pressure point on Grenda, allowing herself freedom. "I am not a shapeshifter you uncivilized-" Pacifica quickly covered her mouth and breathed slowly. "Look." Pacifica placed her hands together. "What I meant was that I am a changed person."

"What does that mean?" Pacifica's friends asked nervously as the other kids listened.

Pacifica gazed around the listeners. "Ever since after the annual party at my mansion, the triangle guy taking over, and losing a majority of the Northwest fortune; I wanted to change myself for the better." Pacifica took another deep breath. "It all started when we moved into that old smaller mansion I'm convinced is haunted."

* * *

A limousine pulled in front of an old looking mansion with some contractors speaking about remodeling.

"Well …." Preston and his wife walked out of the limousine with a sense of disgrace. "We are now living closer to that backwards town."

Pacifica walked out from the other side and looked at the landscape left untouched for years until recently, the old driveway with many cracks and weeds growing, and the mansion itself gave her chills from an unfamiliar environment.

"Remember." Preston looked at his depressed looking family. "This is a …. turn back from our life." He spoke as he tries holding his mind together. "We still have our Mud Flap factory that provides us with money. But we may never return to the true Northwest Mansion." He shivered at the thought of what McGucket was doing to it. "Our family name is probably an insult to our friends, but one day we'll rise back on top. I'm sure of it …. No I'm not!" Preston had another emotional breakdown as the moving truck arrived.

Pacifica ….. she was lost. Just lost.

Due to their setback, her family can no longer go on long extended vacations in the farthest of exotic hotspots, most of her prized wardrobe selections were sold off, and to top off everything, she can only have one pony. One…. Pony!

"Where do you want your pony?" One guy came, bring a quadrupedal animal to the property.

Pacifica looked at the thing and her jaw dropped lower than when she learned she can only have the single pony, accept now it looks like it was no pony."

"Oh …. It appears I've made a mistake in selling our animals." Preston loosened his tie. "But I'm sure there are races for ….. fooooooor whatever that is."

"That's a llama!?" Pacifica shouted at the infant llama being let loose.

"Meh." The guy left with that only response.

The llama walked over to her and sniffed her hair.

"Well, I believe we should be settling into that …. Cobweb filled home." Mrs. Northwest spoke with a shiver.

"Relax, dear. We'll have it remodel …. Eventually." Preston calmed himself down, still holding down tears.

The three walked into the small mansion. The door slowly opened, squeaky very so eerily as the sunlight revealed to the Northwest their new home. Their new, dust filled, light deprived, mice infested, horror film-themed mansion.

"O.K. family." Preston spoke up. "If we see a ghost; just go straight the hovel, asked Mr. Pines for help, and listen to him so we won't have to deal with another explanation to any powerful guests of ours."

Pacifica's mood brighten up, but by only a small amount. " _He actually learned something that day_?" Pacifica recalled how her parents acted when they had ghost activities from an ancient curse. Then a spider landed on her nose.

"Eeeew!" she swatted it way. "I'll just go find a room for myself." Pacifica grabbed her light luggage and walked around the empty hallways. Each step gives off a small squeak which sounds like a dirty mouse passing by. After checking each room, she found one that was quite suitable for her taste, by comparison.

It was master sized bedroom, but not as big as the true master bedroom which she figured her parents will want. In the room contains a walk-in closet and a balcony with the view of the small ranch the llama will be staying at, and also there's a goat next to her.

"Baaaa." said Gompers.

With a twitch in her face, the girl sighed painfully and marched back inside. "I can't believe this is happening!" She dropped to the floor. "Dad just had to put stocks into some Mr. Pyramid's 'take over the world' whatever and had to sell the mansion to get enough money back. How can things get any worse?"

"What do you mean my Mud Flap Factory's being closed down!?" Pacifica heard her dad downstairs. "The police found what?! … The police did their job right?! …. Yeah I can cover it up." Preston stuck his head into Pacifica's room. "Daughter. Another bump in the road have appeared … you're going to p-p-p-p-p-"

"Prison!?" Pacifica gasped.

"No no! …. Public School."

"…. Heh, that's a relief ….. Public School…." Pacifica's mind wandered aimlessly in her own head. "Public School? Peasant School? I am a Northwest!" She stood right up. "My family have done nothing but brought this lousy town to ….What …. What am I saying!?" Pacifica eyes widen as she held her head in frustration.

"This is exactly what we deserve! My family lied, cheat, push people down, and who knows what else just to get us on top. Us only!"

Pacifica marched through the mansion and right outside to get some well needed fresh air. "Yeah, this should be happening to us. Being in a miserable old house and being laughed at by everyone."

"This just in, the Northwest just moved into the old mansion because of losing everything for swearing loyalty to Bill Cipher." Toby Determined said a few feet away, still dressed in his apocalypse outfit. "Now that every single person in the 1% is making fun of your family, how will your hide your shame that surpasses my way."

Then Officer Blubs and Deputy Durland shocked him with tasers.

Pacifica left the scene and walked right into the ranch. "And this is my fate. A hoopless, bleacherless, fountainless, auto-matic-feederless ranch with only a stable and a feeding tray.

She sat on the wooden fence to let her new life sink in. "This is what I deserve. The link to the world's worst chain ….. wait …." Pacifica rose her head up.

(Flashback)

Pacifica recalled the events at the party where Dipper spoke to her in the hidden room.

"Pacifica, I'm sorry for what I said earlier. But just because you're your parents' daughter doesn't mean you have to be like them."

Pacifica looked at the boy and smiled softly.

"It's not too late."

(End Flashback)

"Wow …. Since that floating nacho showed up, I forgot about that." Pacifica thought for a while about that moment as the wind blew into her hair. The more she thought, the brighter her smile grew. "This is … this actually a turning point to me." She hopped off the fence with a smile. "Since I won't be doing that much rich activities before, I can focus on being me. The real me! The one to clear our family name for the better." She looked up into the sky as the sun sets. "But, where should I start. Well I guess I did start off good at the Northwest Mansion Party, and their party."

(Flashback)

Nearing the end of Dipper and Mabel's 13th birthday, the blonde was speaking to the Mystery Twins.

"So you're leaving tomorrow?" Pacific asked the twins. "And you won't be back until next summer?" She felt sadden knowing that this may be the last time she sees them in a long time.

"That's right. And we love the gifts you got us." Mabel showed off her golf-clubs. "With these, our miniature golf-courses are gonna be more awesome!"

Dipper smiled as he held out a season collection of Ghost Harassers. "And I'll be marathoning my favorite show."

"Well I thought those gifts were best suited for … our few good times." Pacifica took a deep breath. "Dipper, Mabel. I … I want to apologize for how I was treating you through the whole summer. I had no right."

Mabel gave the girl a compassionate smile. "Awww, I forgive you. Now come here!" Without warning, Mabel gave the cautious girl a tight hug. "Pacifica Northwest, when we get back to Gravity Falls next June, you are becoming one of my friends to do crazy girl stuff with."

Pacifica, despite the lack of air, allowed the hug to last as best she could.

"And since we'll be both 13, it's gonna be more crazy!"

Dipper sighed, thinking about the more how the sleepovers his sister will have with the reformed Pacifica. "And who knows, maybe we can go on mystery hunts together."

"Together how?" Mabel asked.

"You know, Mabel." Dipper answered his sister. "With you, me, Pacifica, Soos, Wendy, Ford, and heck even Stan."

"Oh." Mabel said, but then secretly wrote down something in her 'Match Making' list. "One possibility for the future."

Pacifica softly laughed. "Well whatever you're exploring. I can still sue any creeps that dare mess with us!"

"Hooray!" shouted Mabel. "Now group hug with you, Dipper. I still remember the hug you two shared!"

"Mabel…" Dipper miserably groaned as he and Pacifica lightly blushed.

(End Flashback)

Her thoughts were interrupted by the baby llama. "Oh …." Pacifica looked confusingly at the llama staring at her. "Hey?"

The llama sniffed her hair and walked over to a large plastic ball.

"Do you want to play or something?"

The llama responded as it bounced the ball towards her. Pacifica kicked the ball farther away as the llama chased after it. Seeing the small thing knocking it around and making cute noises actually made Pacifica sighed.

"Heh, this is for the best."

She spent the rest of the day playing with the llama, filling ber mind with ease for the future to come. A future she'll shape herself.

* * *

"That's so beautiful!" Grenda said, sneezing into a tissue.

Pacifica looked at the kids with a smile. "So there you have it." She placed her hands on her hips. "For now on I will no longer insult the common folks, or anyone for that matter. I'll be generous for the sake of being generous, help out the town, and even … jump in mud for fun." Pacifica said with a confused look. "I don't really know if I'll partake in that. But you should understand."

Pacifica's friends and the others looked at one another and whispered. "Soooo …. Will you still be giving use free stuff and inviting us to parties."

"Oh please." Pacifica waved her hand. "Even if my dad wasn't trying to hog as much money as possible, I want to use my power for the right reasons."

Then the whole classroom was filled with boos and name calling and the kids sat back down, including Pacifica's two friends.

"Guys?" Pacifica was given the cold shoulder by everyone, everyone minus Grenda and Candy. An empty seat stood next to Candy and Pacifica took it. "So ….. was money really the only reason they hung out with me?"

"For the record, you did cheat in that singing contest with Mabel." Candy reminded Pacifica, causing her to regret that moment.

"And I won that crown that should have been Mabel." Pacifica took a moment to think. "I should send it back to her." She looked at the two. "You should know Mabel's address. Right?"

"We do." Candy answered. "We already started a trend to send each other gifts."

"And you can help us decorate the box!" Grenda shouted, holding a box of arts supplies.

"You two … want me to help?" Pacifica asked. "Wow … I haven't even told you I'm sorry yet."

"You already did." Candy answered. "You should come to my house after school. We'll teach you how to wrap better."

"But not the so-called singing rap." Grenda said. "I'm with Wendy on that one!"

"The low-level food source?" Pacifica asked, thinking of what she considered fast food.

"Pacifica Northwest, you have a lot to learn."

"Your right." Pacifica playfully said, looking at her two new friends. "I do have a lot to learn."

 **End of Chapter**

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	7. The Paranormal Club

**Chapter 7:** The Paranormal Club

"FREEEEEEEDOOOOOOOOM!" Mabel was the first out of all the students to run out the door after school have ended for today. She jumped right on the grass and rolled around. "I missed you, outside."

Dipper came out and just smiled. "We're not going to survive until summer, are we?"

"Doesn't look like it." Dyami laughed. "You must love Gravity Falls with all your soul."

"You have no idea." Dipper said. "Besides the paranormal, we had a ton of fun with some new friends and our Grunkles."

"But the mysteries are always the biggest. Like that Bunker with the Shapeshifter." Mabel lifted herself up. "Which reminds me. We have got to have our first club meeting before we actually get, ugh, homework."

"She's right." Beethoven came out. "We must hang out with Mabel, I mean join the club for …. Something."

Dyami folded his arms and tilted his head. "Relax; since I'd moved into the same neighborhood as you, we can all just walk to one of our houses." Dyami looked at the twins. "You've mentioned in lunch that your great uncle was studying the paranormal in Gravity Falls." He smiled like a fanboy. "Do you think we can get him in an online chat?"

Dipper rubbed the back of his neck. "He's not really used to the internet just yet. But I can give him a call. He was working on recreating the journals from Stan's copies."

"Really?" Mabel asked. "The Journals are being revived after Bill Cipher destroyed them? We're back in business!"

"I still don't understand." Beethoven said. He turned to Dyami who only shrugged.

"We'll explain later, we should meet up at our house." Dipper said.

Beethoven froze up a bit. "You-You-You mean yours and Mabel's house? With-With your parents who can easily judge me?"

"Yep." Mabel said obliviously. "I hope you like pigs."

"Uhhh, I don't eat pigs." Dyami said. "I'm not a vegetarian, but pigs are just unhealthy in general. Since they're scavengers like dogs and vultures."

"What do you mean scavengers?" Beethoven asked, regretting the ham sandwich he had.

Afterwards the kids were picked up by their own parents. Mabel and Dipper told their folks how their first day went and the new student.

"And we met this boy who's into the paranormal just like Dipper. We're going to start a club." Mabel said as their parents sounded happy.

"That's great to hear." Mr. Pines said while driving.

Mrs. Pines looked over to Dipper. "Looks like Gravity Falls really paid off for you, Dipper."

Mabel wrapped her arms around Dipper's neck. "Who's friendly now? This guy right here!"

Dipper sheepishly laughed as they pulled into their garage. "And it also turned out that he and his family moved right across the street from us."

"And there he is!" Mabel squealed when Dyami and his family arrived home.

"Oh, the Grey family." Mr. Pines waved to their new neighbors. "They moved in last month. Great people, unlike our last neighbor who won the lottery."

"I can still remember the all-nighter parties." Mrs. Pines rubbed her temples.

"Mabel, Dipper!" Dyami crossed the street.

"He said my name first." Mabel pupils grew.

"So are you ready to call your ingenious Great Uncle Ford?" Dyami asked.

"We'll do that right now." Dipper said. "But we should probably wait for…." Dipper then noticed Beethoven standing with them, perfectly still.

"Oh, hello Beethoven." Mrs. Pines said.

Beethoven just stood there, with no response.

"Why does he always do this?" Mr. Pines said. "Well we'll leave you kids alone. Behave yourself."

The parents left and Dipper and Mabel brought Dyami inside, that's when Beethoven released his breath. "Nailed it."

They all sat in the living room where Mabel served them some of her very own Mabel juice, which made the two new friends feel very uncomfortable.

"Thanks?" Dyami said as he took a cup and examined the plastic toys inside.

"You're welcome." Mabel said with a red face.

"I'll love it!" Beethoven jugged the cup, regretting it instantly.

Dipper was on the phone getting in contact with Ford.

* * *

The phone rang in the Mystery Shack and Soos was right there to pick it up. "Mystery Shack. Under new management, Soos speaking."

"Soos, it's me, Dipper."

Hearing Dipper's voice brighten Soos's already excited day. "Dipper! How's home? I miss you already." He whimpered like a sad dog.

"Great, Soos. Made some new friends and we're starting our own Paranormal Club."

Soos smiled with joy. "That's great, dude. Now you can explore all the mysteries in Piedmont."

"Well Piedmont is not as mysterious as Gravity Falls." Dipper said, "But right now Mabel is asking our new friend, Dyami, if he's one of the mystical creatures in her so-called romance novels." Dipper held up the phone to let Soos listen in.

"Are you a vampire?"

"No."

"Werewolf?"

"No."

"Merman?"

"No."

"Wendigo?"

"Do you any idea what that is?!"

Soos scratched his head. "This is one strange generation."

"Tell me about it." Dipper said. "So is Ford there? I want to talk to him."

"Sorry, dude. Ford and Stan are in town. They're still getting ready for their big trip."

"Right. Wish I could go. But when they come back, can you tell them to send us a copy of his complete volume of the journals when they're done."

"Oh he is far ahead of that, dude." Soos smiled. "He gathered all the copies last night and made a fresh new one. He already mailed it to you kids today."

"Really?! That's great!" Dipper smiled. "When will it get here?"

"Hey Dipper, we got a package from Gravity Falls!" Mabel called out to them.

"Tell Grunkle Ford thanks times a million!" Dipper said with an over amount of joy.

"No problem, Dipper. Enjoy your school year."

"You too. I mean have fun as Mr. Mystery."

"It's already a dream come true." Soos spoke softly before hanging up. Emotions overwhelmed the guy and all the lights turned off except for one spotlight. "When you wish upon a star. Makes no difference who you are. Anything your heart desires. Will come to you ….. actually I had to work here as a handyman to get where I am today."

* * *

Dipper rushed to the package Mabel was holding and opened it instantly. A heavenly light beamed off from the new journal. The design of it resembles the original journals, but with no tears or wears compared to the over thirty-year older ones. The six-finger symbol had also changed, instead there were three smaller symbols labeled 1, 2, and 3. "Wow, a new journal." Mabel said in aww. "And free lights." Mabel took out some Christmas lights that were turned on.

Dipper opened the journal and remembered each page. He smiled gratefully as he embraced the book close to his beating heart.

"Dipper, you're starting to creep me out." Beethoven said as Dipper hugged the book like a long-lost friend.

"Huh? I mean uh." Dipper snapped out of it. "This is the completed journal my uncle Ford sent."

"Really?" Mabel grabbed the book off his hands. "Yeah, here are the unicorns and gnomes. It even has all the stuff you added."

Mabel handed the book to Dyami. Flipping only a few pages he could see some amazing designs of such creatures and artifacts, and some very stupid looking ones like the Leprecorn. "If it wasn't for the fact that I met the Lilliputtians and a Gnome who only says 'Shmebulock' I would say you're all crazy. Fun crazy that is."

"He called me fun." Mabel sighed to herself.

They spend the hour showing Dyami and Beethoven the content of the journals and the crazy adventures they had. Dyami was very developed into the tales they told like the Shapeshifter, the Dinosaurs, and the Society of the Blind Eye.

Beethoven was still lost.

"This …. This is incredible!" Dyami flipped through the pages. "I just wanted to start a Paranormal Club just to talk about it. But this! I think we have a new purpose!" Dyami stand on the coffee table. "Today marks the beginning of our Paranormal Research Team. Right here in Piedmont!"

"Um, Yaaaaay!" shouted Beethoven.

Dipper laughed at Dyami, he sees him as a direct copy of himself. Only not awkward at all and probably have girls chasing after him without following any Grunkle Stan's advice.

"But you know; it's not like Piedmont is a paranormal hotspot like Gravity Falls. Heck, except for a few haunting reports, Piedmont's dry."

"How can you be so sure?" Dyami sat next to him. "You've only started looking for the paranormal when you arrived at Gravity Falls, correct?"

Dipper nodded.

"But what if there are creatures right here that you didn't even noticed?"

Dipper felt his chin. "That's right. Before this summer, I've been keeping to myself. And there is a trail in the woods a few miles away."

"And a park!" Mabel said. "There could be a fairy castle right behind the bathrooms!" She gasped and shook her brother. "Dipper, go to the fairy section."

Dipper followed her sister's command and turned to where Ford had recorded his findings of fairies. "Wow, Mabel you were on the right track there."

Dyami and Beethoven looked surprised.

"It says here that fairies will build their miniature castles near locations with strong odor to keep intruders away. That and also where a lot of spiders are."

"Clever butterfly people." Dyami said. "Anything else?"

"Well we can't check every place that will make us barf, but if there was a fairy castle anywhere here, we would be able to hear them sing."

"What do they sing? Eighties music?" Mabel asked.

"Actually, yes." Dipper showed them the drawing of a fairy singing around a Record Player. "They seem to love it here. Also Ford wrote here that this is how he'd discovered Zombies' weakness."

"I am on the ball!" Mabel shouted in joy. "Today's lottery number is infinity!"

Beethoven felt his head. "I still don't understand … but."

"But what?" Mabel jumped in front of him, making the boy turned deep red. "Tell me all."

"All." Beethoven yelped before slapping himself. "I mean I actually heard eighties music out of nowhere."

"You do?" both Dipper and Dyami said.

"Yeah, every time I go jogging."

(Flashback)

"I … I need …." Beethoven lost all his energy and collapsed in front of the park's bathroom.

'I was totally jogging for at least an hour and not only ten seconds. That's when I heard it.'

 _Don't start, unbelieving. Never don't not feel your feelings._

'It didn't sound like a radio or anyone in the bathrooms. But like a million of girly things singing.'

"Hello? Who's there? Don't mess with me!" Beethoven. "My dad works at Mintendo."

'Feeling that there was an overpowered threat that sadly no mortal like me can handle, I was force to evacuate.'

"AAAAAAAAHHHHH!" he shouted and ran off.

(End Flashback)

"That happened every time I go there, but I never tried to find out where it was coming from."

"Until now!" Mabel said. "We are going to go to the park and find those fairies! Also I think I might be psychic!"

"Yes, we shall uncover the truth!" Dyami shouted. "I love your energy, Mabel! You're so motivating."

"EEEEEEEE!" Mabel jumped.

"I'm motivated too. I mean I love motivating energy. I mean I'll help!" Beethoven said with sweat running down his face.

The energy around the room made Dipper feel like he was still in Gravity Falls, eager to learn more of the paranormal and to spent time with people he cares about. "Well what are we waiting for, let's find those fairies."

"You mean those magic, tiny, wing girls. Right?"

Dipper and the others turned to see their parents.

"Yes!" Mabel answered. "What else can it be?"

…

After an awkward silent, Mabel and Dipper packed some vital tools and together the Paranormal Team made their way to the park.

"Well, here we are." Dipper breathed in the fresh air. "Still the same as we left it, huh Mabel?"

"Like the playground. And look, there's the fox from earlier." Mabel ran up to the Red Fox who was just lying in the grass. "Go Vegan, you bunny eater!" Mabel ran back to the group, leaving the fox confused.

"Mabel, how did you recognize that fox?" Dipper asked.

"That's the way of the Mabel." His energetic sister confirmed.

"I must say, this is an outstanding park." Dyami said as he observed the tennis court, the pond, a waterpark, and a fire pit some parents were complaining about.

"There are also a romantic nature walk, a romantic tree house that you can see a romantic waterfall from, a romantic museum art tour, a romantic boat ride, and a romantic rock. Did I mention they were all romantic?"

Dyami backed away a few inches from Mabel. "O.K. ….. are those the bathrooms you were talking about, Beethoven?"

"T-That's it alright."

The four kids slowly approached the bathroom where a green-faced man holding his mouth ran into.

"Alright Team." Dipper caught their attention and showed them the fairy section of the journal. "From Grunkle Ford's notes, fairies are peaceful creatures that loves girly things. Just as long as we pose no harm, nothing bad will happen."

They all nodded and covered their noses to search for the castle. "You know it's probably not that bad." Dipper was soon proven wrong when the guy from before ran out coughing. "There is no hope in there. No hope…."

Dipper backed away as he followed the team behind the building. "Since this is a popular path, their castle is probably hidden underground with only a small entrance. I already packed us work gloves to search the ground for the-"

"Found it!" Mabel shouted.

Dipper ran ahead and couldn't believe his eyes. The princess-y looking, miniature castle was standing right behind the bathrooms. Literally out in the open with no trees, rocks, or anything to hide it. Heck the horseshoe game sets were only a yard away.

"This can't be real."

Suddenly from the castle voices starting singing.

"Disco Girl, Coming through, that girl is you.'

Dyami covered his ears. "And their singing the most dreadful song of my life." Dyami dropped on his knees. "I've spend weeks trying to rid my mind from this song. Why must people enjoy it so?!"

Dipper gave no comment. "O.K …. Mabel, you relate with them more, try introducing yourself."

"On it." Mabel knocked on the door lightly. "Helllloooooo?"

The small door opened and out came a fairy. "Greetings Humans, you are the first of your kind to approach us in a life time."

Dyami grinned widely. "I don't believe it!" He turned to Dipper. "Come on. Ask it something!"

Dipper, with more experience, walked up to the fairy. "Hello girls. I was wondering if you could-"

Before he could say more, Mabel started asking multiple questions. "Do you like nail painting and talking about boys. Oh of course you do. I mean your fairies. Girl Power is the top we have!"

"Mabel…" Dipper groaned.

Dyami slowly moved toward him, looking rather worried. "D-Dipper, are you sure they're docile by nature?"

"Trust me, my Grunkle's an expert." Dipper smiled. "There is no way he'll miss some vital information and not write it down here … but he did added more info with invisible ink before …" Dipper glanced at the journal again. "O.K. He also written down the invisible ink sections in plain sight. …. And we're good. They're all just rainbows and bunnies."

"I don't know, man. Look." The frightful Beethoven pointed at the fairy turning to a dark red and showing some rather sharp fangs.

"Oh boy."

"So what do you think is more fashionable, bows or headbands? I go with headbands because-"

"ENOUGH!" the fairy shouted with a demonic voice. "For centuries humans will uncover our castle and just mock us for the stereotypes that we alone do not hold. We are all tomboys!"

From the other doors and windows came a swarm of fairies filled with bloodthirsty rage.

"You shall suffer a thousand deaths for your false knowledge."

"Oh no, they have the same evil blood as internet commenters!" Dyami jumped in front of the three and drew out a whip. "You shall lay no finger on my new friends! You do that and you'll evoke my justice!"

"He's so dreamy." Mabel sighed before pinching herself. "Still awake."

Feeling outdone, Beethoven ran ahead. "And don't think it's just the three of us." He snickered. "Look to your left."

The fairies turned to the left and saw no one. It took them a few seconds to realize they've been tricked. "They're getting away!"

The kids ran down the path as fast as they could. "Come on, hurry!" Dyami was the fastest out of all of them; leaving behind Mabel and Dipper, who were trying their best to catch up.

"I really need to exercise more." Dipper said, thanking Gravity Falls for the extra muscle strength.

Mabel turned around and saw Beethoven trying to keep up. "Beethoven, come on! You're a jogger for Pete's sake!"

Beethoven had enough and fell down. "You …. I'll hold them …" He laid on his back as the fairies approached them.

"Beethoven!" Dipper and Mabel ran back and Mabel took out her Grappling Hook.

"Let's see, weaknesses, weaknesses." Dipper checked the journal to check for any weaknesses. "Incase fairies are provoked, use fire to ward them off."

Dipper checked his pockets and regretted not taking any matches. "Mabel, have anything to start a fire?"

"Who needs fire when you have a grappling hook!" Mabel shot her grappling hook, only for the rope to be grabbed by the fairies. "Heh, I guess we need fire."

Dyami jumped ahead and swatted at the fairies, only for the same thing to happen to him. "Give that back, it belonged to my deceased grandfather …. No wait, he's still alive."

Beethoven crawled away from the fang-bearing fairies. "Any other ideas?"

Dipper flipped through the pages and found nothing. "Can we just apologize?"

The fairies looked at each other in discussion. "No."

"What did I say, blood of internet commenters."

All hope seemed lost, but then out of anything else that could happened, a stream of fire appeared. Blocking the kids from the fairies.

"Great thinking, Dipper!" Dyami complimented his friend.

"I didn't do this." Dipper said as the fairies backed away. "Mabel?"

"Nuh-uh." Mabel shook her head. "That only leaves ….. you!"

"Me?" Beethoven asked, and received a big hug from his crush.

"You didn't tell me you had fire powers."

Beethoven shook off the shyness and acted tough. "Yeah, it's my secret weapon. I don't always use it. But when I do, it's-"

"Please stop." Dipper said as he looked around. He noticed to the left something short running into the shrubs. He also took note that the fairies were also looking in the same direction.

"Urgh, her again." One fairy said.

Another fairy called out to the kids. "We'll let you off with a warning this time. But don't ever go by stereotypes ever again!"

The fairies retreated as the flames died down.

"We won!" Mabel shouted. "Score one for Team Paranormal! We really need to work on the name."

"I agree." Dyami said as he put his whip away. "We must celebrate."

Dipper checked where the flames were and found a surprised. "Wow."

"What is it?" Beethoven asked.

"Do you see this?"

Beethoven looked and was not amused. "Uh, nothing."

"Exactly!"

Beethoven glanced at Dipper and where the flames were. "O.K. you're being dumb."

Dipper shook his head. "You don't get it. What's usually happen to things that catches on fire?"

"They burn to a crisp." Beethoven said. His words circled around his head for a moment before suddenly realizing it. "Hey, there's no burnt marks."

Mabel and Dyami also noticed no trace of flames anywhere. "Wow, that's awesome." Mabel grinned. "I just got hundreds of ideas."

Dyami inspected the concrete walkway and the soil. "Amazing. What source of nature was that?"

"Whatever it is, it's gone now." Dipper glanced back to the shrubs. "But do you know what this means?"

"We're going home, away from man-eating fairies and random Houdini fire?" Beethoven asked.

Dipper turned to them with the biggest and brightest grin. "There are more paranormal activities happening here other than Gravity Falls!"

"Huzzah!" Mabel shouted. "I can't believe we're actually doing mysteries right here at home! Oooooo. I can't wait to tell Candy and Grenda online. I really need a cellphone!"

Dipper hugged his journal. "I can't wait to tell Uncle Ford all about this. But he'll be busy before leaving. I need to right this all down." Dipper gasped at a suddenly realization. "I should write my own journal!"

Beethoven stood up, just …. Just wished he could speak his mind. "I want to quit right now. But I now I won't." Beethoven looked over at Mabel cheering. Just the way she leaped into danger like that made him admire her more. "Hey, if I help them catch some monster, I'll be popular for once."

Dyami looked towards the setting sun. "We should get back home. Dinner time will be ready soon."

"And you get extra points for not calling it supper." Mabel said.

Dipper also looked toward the sun. "Well whatever's out there, we'll find it. No matter what ….. but don't forget we have school."

"Oh, booo!" shouted Mabel as the others complained.

"I hate homework." Beethoven sighed. "Just for that, I'm gonna pound you."

"Hey." Mabel protested, which calmed Beethoven.

As they walked through the park, Dipper gave one more glance back at the shrubs. "What was that?" Dipper laid his question to rest as he left to enjoy a fine dinner at home.

Within the bushes stood a creature with gentle emerald eyes watching the kids head home to where they belong, with their families.

 **The End**

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 **A/N:** Why yes there will be mysteries that go on through multiple chapters. These may be one-shots, but I'm planning on going deeper with them.

Also I really appreciate the views and reviews this fanfiction is receiving. Currently it is my 6th most viewed story with over 4,000 views, and it has only been two weeks since this was posted … Gravity Fall's finale was three weeks ago …


	8. Old Enemies

**Chapter 8:** Old Enemies

Over at Gravity Falls' Greasy Diner, Stanley and Stanford were being served flapjacks by the proprietor of the diner, Lazy Eye Susa.

"Enjoy, handsome."

"M-Me?" asked Stanford Pines, mumbling his words from hope.

"No, you." Susan pointed at Stanley who quickly hid under the table.

Susan took this as playing hard to get and laughed as she served her next customer.

"Trust me, you don't want that one." Stanley rose up. "I still get lost when she list her cats."

Stanford lightly laughed. "Well we all have weaknesses."

"Oh I hear you, Stanford Pines."

The twins looked over and saw Lil' Gideon sitting at the table next to him. "Oh look, if it isn't my old competitor who lost this town's love after I exposed you as a fraud."

"Oh laugh all you want, Stanford. I mean Stanley." Gideon folded his widdle chubby arms. "You're as much as a fraud as I am."

"Well you're half wrong there." Stanley laughed. "Old Ford here is practically Mr. Mystery."

Stanford chuckled. "Even with my 'real' attractions, I wouldn't be able to introduce them like Soos."

"Because Soos is fun." Stanley nudged his brother. "You won't see him playing your dungeon game. Just something with cardboard disguises or something."

Gideon hopped off his seat. "Stanford Pines. The real one." Gideon cleared his throat. "Now I know you and myself once had an alliance with Bill before, which is why it is suitable for me to ask you a …. favor of some sort."

"Hold on there, Powder-Cover Stump." Stanley said. "If you think my brother will get you back on top or marry Mabel, you can just forget about it."

"Wait, you don't understand. Well people will get hurt." Gideon quickly shook his hands from seeing the twins' stern glares. "You have it all wrong. I am holding my promise to be a regular kid."

(Cutaway)

'Gideoooooon!'

Gideon rode on his skateboard down the street with 90's music playing, until he ran into some garbage cans.

(End Cutaway)

"Look. At school I have come across want you may call 'bullies'."

"Oh I see where you're going." Stanley said as he lounged. "Cough it all up."

Gideon explained how his first day back to school was and how well he'd improved. "I used no such manipulating schemes or nothin on my teacher, fellow students, or any other faculties. Why heck, if it wasn't for Bill, they'll still consider me public enemy number one. However that all changed when they came along"

(Flashback)

Gideon was just walking down the hall, minding his own business, until someone picked him up and tossed him into the closet.

(End Flashback)

"How could anyone do this to Widdle Ol' Me?"

"Me, Mabel, Dipper. Three, three people right off the bat." Stanley laughed. "Trust me, everyone have to go through bullying. Even us." Stanley cracked his knuckles. "And there is only one way to deal with bullies."

"Stanley, no." Stanford asked. "Well actually I would freeze Crampelter in a block of ice when given the chance, but I have more important stuff to do."

"Then clear your calendar." Stanley said with a grin. "I happened to track down where that overgrown jerk lives through NoLifeBook. I mean the guy practically posted everything in his life like it was some kind of diary."

"AHEM!" Gideon shouted. "Listen, I know we have our unhealthy history. But as one victim of bullying to another, I would like to borrow a mystical relic or advanced technology so I can destroy my enemies!" Gideon quickly calmed down after a manacle laugh. "I mean scare them off. I can't get Ghost Eyes and the others to deal with them since they all have been brought back to that retched prison. But they do send me the most fascinating friendship bracelets."

Stanford shook his head. "Sorry, my knowledge is currently only reserve for my research and family. Which is why I trusted Mabel with a crossbow and brought Dipper into a UFO with highly dangerous security that attack when they sense fear."

"Alright, we're having a huge talk about his before the twins get back next summer." Stanley said sternly. "Wow … am I the one being responsible?"

"We truly are the Senor Mystery Twins." Stanford said as Stanley chuckled.

"UFO you say?" Gideon asked curiously. "No, that is not the dilemma at hand." From his hair Gideon took out a piece of paper. "Now Stanford, do you recognize this?"

Stanford looked at the sheet. "I knew I'd noticed a page missing from Journal 2." Stanford also took notice that it was torn in half and covered in tape, most likely from a one of Gideon's episodes.

"Yes … so I would like some help with these bullies in exchange for the last piece of knowledge."

Stanford and Stanley looked at each other, and then both laughed.

"Kid, I've made copies of those nerd books the moment I got my hands on them." Stanley said. "Trust me, turn that fat into muscle and the bullies will run away like a guy who just …... is this joke appropriate? Who cares! Like a guy who just found out his girlfriend is-"

Stanford quickly covered his mouth. "Or you could tell a parent or teacher." The more knowledgeable sibling suggested. "Did you even see their faces?"

"Well …. No." Gideon answered.

"Then how are you going to seek revenge?"

"And heck, what if it was the janitor who mistook your hair for a mop and put you in the closet." Stanley laughed. "Will you say that you just got out of-"

"No Stanley." Stanford scolded.

Gideon turned red in anger. "My hair is my most treasured possession! No one can possibly mistake it for a mere mortal mop!"

"Here's my mop." Then a janitor came by with his cleaning equipment cart. "Looks like mops are envolvin' these days like the confusing Japanese cartoon says."

The janitor picked the squirming Gideon and threw him in the pin. "YOU UNGRATEFUL, UNCIVILIZED, OLD MAN! I SHALL SUMMON MORE DEMONS TO TORMENT EACH AND EVERY MOMENT OF YOU LIFE!"

The Elder Pine Twins just sat there and watch the hilarious moment. "Boy; that was more hilarious than when I took him down. Good old karma. O.K. karma and I have a love-hate relationship." said Stanley.

"Well at least I have a momentum of the original journals." Stanford inspected the page's blank side. "I think I've written a whole section here in invisible ink. I'll check it out later."

Stanley looked at the T.V. where the News was being broadcast. "Before we go into the weather, here are the lottery numbers." The lottery machine shot out a single ball. "Only one ball? Hm …. Well it appears today's number is …. Infinity?"

"Sweet Belgian Waffles!" Stanley shouted in rage. "I kept hearing that word all day! Who could have predicted that?"

 **End of Chapter**

 **Dfablk objxfkba x jlm clo xylrq x tbbh. Promofpfkdiv, bxqfkd plxm fp dlla clo qeb zlzzvu.**


	9. Home Made?

**Chapter 9:** Home Made?

"Welcome to my Shiro." Candy opened the door to her house and welcomed Grenda and Pacifica inside.

"So this is what a Middle Class house looks like on the inside." Pacifica, with the party crown in her hands, looked around the living room. She really admired the Japanese style and gave Candy a positive compliment, but still this all felt alien to her. "Are suburban house rooms always this small?"

Candy giggled. "Small by the rich people's definition?"

Pacifica sat on the comfortable couch as Candy and Grenda brought out their art supplies. "Today I was thinking of sending Mabel something home-made."

"Home-made?" Pacifica asked. "You mean something made from the walls or floor?"

"Ha! Good one, Pacifica." Grenda laughed.

"Good what?" asked Pacifica. "So what, we just tear off pieces of the stairs? Cut up the rug?" Pacifica guessed as the two girls looked very confused. "Wait hold on. Does the house itself actually make the gifts?!" Pacifica hopped off and looked around. "Is this Middle Class normal or Paranormal normal?"

"This is worse than we thought." Candy spoke as Grenda informed Pacifica.

"No, we'll be making the gifts ourselves. Right here!"

"Oh." Pacifica said. Then the realization of her action sunk in. She blushed and gave a fake laugh. "Of course that is what home-made means. It's .. it's a joke. Heh."

Candy and Grenda decided to take it and showed her their supplies. Pacifica looked around the paint, crayons, ribbons, tape, and wrapping papers and took notice of how simple they are. After giving a quick glance to her broken nails, she asked the two what was the best 'beginner' home-made gift.

"Pacifica. There is no, 'beginner' in the arts."

"But Candy, didn't you say true art take time and practice to make your vision come to life?" Grenda asked.

"Yes, but I'm being inspiring." Candy took out an old instant print camera. "Say cheese." Pacifica acted quickly from her years of training and posed on the spot. After the photo was printed and Candy shook it, she handed it to Pacifica. "Let's start out with a letter to Mabel."

Pacifica looked at the photo. "And what's this for?"

"Mabel loves photos." Candy said. "She has to know that you're in the group now."

"And the camera loves us!" Grenda said with joy. "Now glue that onto your letter."

"Oh, right." Pacifica skimmed around the supplies, looking very carefully for the glue, for about five minutes.

"You don't know what glue is, do you?"

Pacifica jumped a bit from Candy's question. "I-of course I do!" She picked up the nearest object. "See? Glue."

"…Yeeeeeessss." The two girls nodded to what Pacifica considered glue, ketchup.

"Why is there ketchup here?" Candy whispered to Grenda who just shrugged.

After introducing Pacifica to a different type of glue, Pacifica spotted the cow on it. "Is glue made from cows?"

"Yes and sometimes horses." Candy's educational lesson quickly turned to a nightmare for Pacifica.

"They … they only do that to old horses, right? Definitely not purebred ponies I had to sell, right?!"

Candy gave the more appropriate answer to calm the blonde girl. "O.K. why not you write down how much you want to change on the middle of the sheet." Candy handed her a paper.

"Then you pour the glitter all over the empty spots." Genda demonstrated as she took a handful of glitter and threw it on a piece of paper, creating an exact replica of Picasso's 'The Old Guitarist'. "Darn it, I wanted to make a fish!"

Using a pen to best suit her thoughts, Pacifica wrote down the extended apology and about the crown. With a full name signature, Pacifica took the photo of herself and glued it on the top of the sheet.

"Great, now use your imagination. And by that I mean decorate it." Candy gestured to the art supply to keep Pacifica on the right track.

Pacifica smirked. "It there's one thing we Northwests are known for, that isn't horrible, it is our taste of design."

Grenda and Candy began working on their individual gifts as they keep an eye on Pacifica's progress.

Pacifica Northwest was true to her words, even if she probably never done this before, she had an eye for creating an attractive letter. Everything about it was well organized and had the right choice of colors to give it a three dimensional effect.

"Well, vela! It's finished." Pacifica showed off her finished masterpiece to the girls.

"It's amazing." Candy said in amazement.

"I wanna touch it." Grenda tried reaching for it, but Pacifica pulled it away.

"Don't want to be rude, but this is very delicate." Pacifica carefully placed it in an envelope. "All true artwork must be handled with care as much as its value. Especially if the said artwork is a personal message."

Grenda and Candy clapped. "That was amazing." Candy spoke with astonish.

Pacifica took the compliments to heart. "Thanks, Candy." She pondered for a moment. "You know, I think I want to create something original for Mabel."

"Go for it!" shouted Grenda. "Create something from scratch!"

"Maybe an oven mitten." Candy suggested. "Mabel loves to cook."

"An oven mitten?" Pacifica wasn't quite sure how to create a common tool that would be used in daily activities unlike her letter. "We I'm sure I'm skilled enough to make one."

(A few moments later)

"… So I was thinking that I should just stick with artwork instead of house supplies." Pacifica said with a home-made ….. thing in her hand and a thread needle in her other, bandage covered hand.

"Little tiny baby steps." Candy said as she took the thing. "But she'll love it anyway!"

"Why's that?" asked Pacifica.

"Because your gift came from your heart!" Grenda hugged Pacifica. "With no blood at all!"

Pacifica calmly smiled, trying to take in deep breath. "Grenda …. Air please…." Grenda released Pacifica from her massive strength.

"Well it's getting late." Candy said as she carried three boxes. "Time to mail these in."

Pacifica smiled for her self-achievement of actually doing peasant work and enjoying every minute of it, minus the attempt at oven mitten making.

' _Dear Mabel Pines'_

Pacifica, Candy, and Grenda mailed their packages to California as a montage of the delivery played out.

' _I am pleased to announce that I am officially changing my ways. My smaller mansion is not so bad and I now have my very own baby llama. However my two best friends and followers abandoned me since I was not willing or able to cater to their wants. Luckily both Candy and Grenda offered to become my first true friends. Well technically Dipper is my first real friend, and of course you.'_

The packages arrived at California and Mabel opened the box from Pacifica and found the well-crafted letter.

' _Candy invited me to her house and I made my first home-made thing._ '

Mabel took out the failed attempt of an oven mitten and looked upon it with googly eyes.

' _I know you already forgiven me for all the terrible things I've said, but I still feel guilty about my actions to you and everyone else. So as another step toward the new me, I want you to have this. You were the one that truly deserves it.'_

' _Your friend, Pacifica Elise Northwest'_

Mabel took out the party crown Pacifica had own in the singing contest. "Awwwww." Mabel turned around and saw Dipper, Beethoven, and Dyami playing a video game.

"Hey Dipper. Pacifica is now BFF with my BFFs!"

"Really?" Dipper turned to his sister. "I'm glad she wants to make herself a better person, unlike her parents."

"HA, I win!" Beethoven stood up from the couch and cheered. "I'm the best at alllllll video games!" He batted an eye at Mabel. "That I've played. Which isn't a lot. Because I liiiiiifffffffft …. things."

Dipper smiled and rolled his eyes. "So I guess that ghost I helped bust was the best thing for her."

"That usually happens after you have an awkward hug with her." Mabel said as Dipper quickly blushed. "Now I'm gonna try out my new … whatever this is!" Mabel lifted up the failed oven mitten. "All I need now is gum, mayo, and the Waxed Larry King head."

 **End of Chapter**

 **Rkybhkltkpq ql Mxzfcfzx, texq peb jxab xzqrxiiv jxqzebp x pxqxkfz ofqrxi pvjyli. Qexkhcriiv qeb absfi efjpbic clodbqp texq fq txp clo.**


	10. Special One

**Chapter 10:** Special One

The final moments of school were upon the teenage gang. Robbie groaned from impatience, Tambry was being very tempted to use her phone more despite the risk of being spotted by the over-judgmental teacher, Lee and Nate were just in agony from hearing the teacher's long lecture, and Thompson was on the brink of having a nervous breakdown.

"The first day is almost over and nothing bad happened to me? But that just makes it more likely to have something bad happen to me!" He held his head and rocked back and forth. "How do you deal with this, Wendy? ….. Wendy?"

Wendy, the lumberjack girl who hated High School the most out of any kid there was looking unusually happy. She smiled peacefully as she wrote down the final notes until the bell rung.

"Well that's it for today, class." The teacher turned around. "Now don't forget that you all immediately get homework on the first day of class because I openly hate you all. And I love every minute of it!"

Everyone groaned loudly and the teacher laughed proudly. However he was not too thrilled to see Wendy in such a happy mood. "Well aren't you a letdown for me?" He handed the homework assignment to each student until he reached Wendy. "You on the other hand get two!"

Wendy took the two sheets with no sign of grief, which caused the teacher to scratch is bald head in confusion. "Alright, what's with you today?" He glared at the redhead straight in the eyes. "Ever since you entered high school you always acted like these guys." He gestured to the class. "What's up with you?"

Wendy tucked the sheets into her folders and tilted the pine tree cap to him. "I got a special date today."

All her friends raised their heads upon hearing those works.

When they finally left the school grounds, Wendy was met by her groupies during the walk home.

"So Wendy, we overheard that you got a date." Nate said as they listened closely. "I don't remember seeing you hooking up with anyone lately."

"Yeah." Lee said. "We didn't see you with anyone ever since you dumped Robbie."

Robbie and Tambery were checking Wendy's status updates. "Did this just happen?" Tambry asked as the two couple found nothing.

"Oh …. Not really." Wendy sheepishly smiled; eluding the answer. "Let's just say you he exists."

"Him?" They all looked at each other.

"Can you give us a hint?" Thompson asked.

"Well for one …" Wendy looked over. "Not any of those guys." Wendy pointed at the Gnomes, which Robbie scared them off quickly.

"And two, we've known each other for … a long time. Not too long." Wendy turned away, hiding her red face.

"Come on, tell us." Nate pleaded. "How long was it? A few years?"

Wendy tapped her lips. "Naw, not that long. Maybe months."

"Months?" They all asked each other about any newcomers during the summer. Their discussion flipped through the Mystery Shack Carnival, Woodstick Festival, even that Mayor Debate thing. All they could turn up was nothing. Not a single new teenage boy that they could remember.

"Well if you're not gonna tell us, why not just go all cheesy on us and describe him?" Robbie sarcastically grunted, but Wendy answered anyway.

"He's a reeeaaal sweet guy. Every time I'm feeling bummed out after a rough day or something terrible, he's always there to cheer me up and keep me warm." She held her arms together. "Just the thoughts of his welcoming warm hug just …. put my mind into a majestic place with no pain or suffering. A true paradise where there's only truth and love."

"Wendy, are you O.K.?" Lee asked his sudden gushy, G-rated, love novel speaking friend as she held her head in the clouds. "Were you hanging with Mabel too much during the summer?"

Wendy let out a short laugh. "Funny you should mention …. Never mind." Wendy laughed as she skipped along from the group. "Sorry to leave you hanging, my place is up ahead. See ya tomorrow."

She joyfully followed the path into the forest where the Corduroy Cabin lays.

"I am freaking out, man!" Thompson shouted. "Who is she dating!?"

They all thought long and hard until it finally hit Tambry. "Wow, we're such idiots." She smiled as she and the rest looked at Wendy. "Who do you think?"

It took them a while for them to truly figure it out. "Of course…"

Wendy walked into her cabin and breathed in the familiar aroma of home. "That was a long day…" She softly smiled as she slowly walked up the stairs and into her room. Dropping her bag, she gently sat on the bed and looked over at the laptop and video camera. "Time for our date." Wendy reached for a stereo and played some soft, peaceful music. The teen then took a deep breath and removed the pine tree cap delicately. She took a moment to stare at the hat of her best friend before placing it on her dresser and reaching for the laptop, only to instead wrap herself in her blanket.

"Did you miss me, bed?" Wendy then started snuggling the blanket and brushing her face into the pillow. "I missed you all day. School's so boooring there without you." She covered the blanker over her body, leaving her face only half covered. "And now for our daily, one-hour date. Just you and me, my bed."

Wendy laid in her one true bed, enjoying the warm embrace of her blanker, the gentle to the touch bedsheets, and the wonderfully fluffed pillow that made her feel like she's floating on a cloud in the fast sky. She is truly in love.

 **End of Chapter**

"We missed you, bed." said all of Wendy's friends in their individual homes.

 **Tb xii al qefp! Alk'q abkv fq!**


	11. Melody of Gravity Falls

**Chapter 11** : Melody of Gravity Falls

"Are we all ready?" A man asked the town folks of Gravity Falls who were all equipped with instruments.

"And a one-a and a two-a and a-"

"A musical sounds awesome, but Melody's moving in today!" Soos drove passed the small concert and reached at his destination, a newly rented home in the suburb.

He arrived just in time when another car pulled in and a lovely woman stepped out. "Soos!"

"Melody!"

The two ran toward each other for an abrasive huge, but both tripped on their own feet and landed face first on the solid concrete. They looked at each other and just laughed it off. Soos helped Melody up and they both kissed.

"It's so cool that you're here right now!" Soos said. "You are gonna love it here in Gravity Falls. There's an arcade, a water tower, a movie theater, a secret bunker with an evil shapeshifting monster frozen inside, and that mailbox."

Melody gave a hearty laugh. "But I know the best part you left out."

"What's that?" Soos asked.

"You!" Melody gave him a peck on the cheek, causing the man-child to blush. "The moving truck won't arrive for another two hour; why not show me around town?"

"But Melody, didn't you stay here for a few weeks when we met?"

"I know, but I want the proper tour from you."

"Awwwwww!"

Soos and Melody turned to see the Gnomes gushing. "Is she available to be our Gnome Queen?" Then a puppy came over and carried Jeff away like a stuffed animal. "Hey, let me go! Gnomes, help meeeee!" the leader called out as the others gave chase.

"Well that happened." Melody felt weirded out by that, but just as long as there are no obsessive videogame characters, or a magician, she's perfectly fine.

Soos drove Melody around town and pointed at all the buildings and scenery. "And that there's the statue of the founder of Gravity Falls, that's being replaced right now."

"Why's that? They've made a new one?"

"Nope, because the little dudes discovered that he was a fraud and that the real founder was frozen in peanut brittle. Wish I could taste it." They parked and noticed a man standing next to Mayor Tyler. "Look, there he is right now."

Soos pointed to the true founder, Quentin Trembley. "It's great to see history being fixed. Well I could have done it alone, with ducktape." The 8 1/2th president then jumped onto his horse and road it down the one way traffic. "Cars are Of-The-Cipher!"

The two laughed and Soos noticed something else to point at. "And there's Mr. and Mrs. Northwest dressed like turtles who know Ninjutsu." Soos pointed at the rich couple dressed in trench coats, sunglasses, and black caps. "Hey Northwests! It's me, Soos. Remember the guy who was the Question Mark on the wheel. Like your daughter was the Llama and had to hold hands with McGucket who was Glasses?"

"Our cover has been blown!" Both Northwests leaped into two filled garbage cans with questionable content. "Ahhh, this is even worse!"

The two shared another laugh as Melody assumed they were not really nice people. "Anything else you want to show me?"

Soos pondered as he scanned his surroundings. "I got it." Soos snapped his fingers. "I have to introduce you to the Mystery Shack."

"Of course." Melody said. "I should get a head start to know of the basic of my new job."

It only took a short moment to park in front of the Mystery Shack where Stanley and Stanford were working on their Stan-O-War II.

"And there's the original Man of Mystery himself." He then whispered. "I'm working on a statue of him. Don't spoil it."

Melody nodded as they walked up and greeted the two men. "Hey, my name's Melody. Soos's girlfriend."

She strongly grasped their hands and shook.

"Nice arm there." Stanley complimented as he felt his hand. "Ow, gonna feel that tomorrow." Stanley shook his hand and smiled. "So you're working at the Mystery Shack now, what's your title?"

"She's going to be our new cashier girl." Soos said.

"Don't worry, I know math better than any high school graduate."

Speaking of high school…

"Hey Soos, Melody!" Wendy came over with a happy grinned. "Just took my afternoon nap of the day, a hobby I was just getting back into after like a week of school."

"A week without Dipper and Mabel." Soos quietly sighed to himself.

Wendy cracked her fingers. "I'm ready to know what the plans are now, Mr. Ramirez?"

Melody turned to Soos, wondering what she means.

"Yeah, she was the cashier girl during the summer. But you'll be here full time and Wendy you got school. But you'll still need the money and no one else in Gravity Falls will hire you."

(Cutaway)

Dipper was doing his homework until he felt something. "Why do I have an urge to become an employer?"

(End Cutaway)

Soos thought for a long moment before coming up with his brilliant plan. Soos threw her an over-sized question mark shirt and his old cap. "You are now the part-time Handy Gal."

Wendy eyed the shirt and at Soos. "Soos, I'm not used to fixing things. Let alone keeping them fixed." She laid Soos's old cap down without offending him. "Plus the only time I'll be switching hats is when Dipper comes back."

(Cutaway)

Dipper stopped doing his homework again and looked up. "This is weird."

(End Cutaway)

"Which is why I'll be your role model for the rest of the school year." Soos said proudly.

"At least you made it through high school." Wendy spoke to herself. "Well I guess I can give it a try, but are there any legal stuff against a 15 year-old teen fixing appliances?"

"Naaaaw. I was the handyman since I was 12." Soos said proudly as Stanley slowly slips away.

"Well I would talk to you more." Stanford said as he checked his watch. "But I have to speak with Dipper on the phone. Apparently the kids found a fairy castle in Piedmont."

"A fairy castle?" Wendy said with a hint of irritation. "They weren't as sweet as the unicorns, were they?"

"Actually the first thing I heard was there they were all tomboys." Stanford said as Wendy gave out a 'wot'. "I'll talk to you all later. After I speak with Dipper I'll have to continue preparing our trip ….. where's Stanley?"

When Stanford left, Soos took Melody into the Mystery Shack. "Welcome to the Mystery Shack." Soos introduced the museum. "In this very room contains only a small bit of all the paranormal activities in Gravity Falls. Be amazed!" Soos slid to the first attraction and removed the cloth. "The incredible Dingo Bingo!"

Melody giggled and laughed at the taxidermy of an elderly-dressed Dingo playing Bingo.

"Bravo." Melody cheered.

"And that's not all! I would like to introduce to you the most horrifying thing imaginable. A diagram of a tax collector's mind!"

Soos and Melody went through each exhibit, finishing off with one that puzzled Meldoy. "What do you call this one?"

Soos looked at the exhibit. "Hmmmm. Looks like an exact replica of my Abuelita."

"Because I am your Abuelita, Soos." Soos's grandmother said before turning to Melody with open arms. "Melody!"

"Abuelita!" The two women shared a heartwarming hug. "I haven't seen you since Soos's cousin's wedding. Soos told me about that awful fire."

"Don't worry about it." Melody waved her hand. "These things happens. Or if it was from some fire monster." Melody playfully elbowed Soos. "Got any dragons here?"

"Haven't seen any here." Soos said. "But now I'm kind of shocked there weren't any dragons. Just a p-terodactyl."

"I'll be on it, eventually." Stanford passed by. "Stanley, Stanley?"

"So … have you or anyone else tried telling the news station, government, or even scientists about this place?" Melody asked; only to receive a shrug from Soos.

"And this is where your work station is, the gift shop." Soos brought Melody into the Gift Shop and showed her all the Stan-bobble heads, Question Mark T-shirts, Snow globes, and pencils with those cheap erasers that just smug writing instead of actually erasing it.

"And this is Mr. Pines most treasured possession, the cash register." Soos pressed a button to make the 'ching' sound. "I think there's an elf in there with a bell."

Melody took a seat at the counter and observes her new work space.

Work, work was something Melody kind of hated. Sure she's used to it and doesn't truly get sick of it, but it was something that it represents, being a boring adult. She talked with Soos about how life was better before paying bills and whatnot. She'll rather ride those metal rides in malls and go to some child pizza place instead of putting on a suit.

But here, it seemed so different.

"Soos." Melody looked at her boyfriend and smiled. "You've worked here all your life. Did you ever have another job where no only really have a positive attitude, and it's located in a boring white room with the lights making that annoying buzz, or that no one really treats each other as a family and instead steal all the tip money and blame it on a customer who wasn't wearing the same colored shirt as them?"

"Nope." Soos shook his head. "Well except for one day when Gideon took over the shack, I've been here all the time, and why would I want another job? The Mystery Shack is where I get to listen to Mr. Pines's stories, help him out with his ideas, spend time with him and the dudes, have random dance parties, fight the monster of the day, and also comfort each other when we get sad. I guess having different job is kind of boring."

Melody leaped from her chair and wrapped her arms around Soos's neck. "You have no flippin idea!"

 **End of Chapter**

 **Tbkav xka Jxybi exsb fq jxab klq ybfkd xariqp ….. L.H. Efde Pzelli pqfii przhp.**

 **A/N: If any artist want to draw a scene from any moment in this fanfiction, please PM about it. I'm interested in speaking to artists accepting requests.**


	12. Emails and Live Chats: 1

**Chapter 12** : Emails and Live Chats 1

"Hi, the name's Mabel." Mabel introduced herself in front of the camera. "I'll be your lovely host as we read fan-mail." Mabel took the first letter and opened it.

' _Hello you beautiful cutie, Mabel.'_

"Oh go ooooon." Mabel laughed bashfully.

' _Can you tell us Dipper's real first name_?'

"What a wonderful answer." Mabel shouted. "Now as you all know, Dipper isn't an official first name, yet! We gave him that because of his birthmark. So what did we call him before that nickname stuck? Today is the day that this mystery can be finally put to rest. Drum roll please!" Mabel rushed to a stereo and played a drumroll soundtrack. "Dipper Pines's real name is…."

"Mabel, who are you making this for?" Dipper walked on screen and noticed the letter Mabel was reading. "Is that your handwriting?"

"Dipper, you're ruining my moment." Mabel frowned and turned her back. "What business do you have here, Killer of Entertainment?"

Dipper pointed out the door of her room. "I was just going to tell you that everyone got our email addresses and sent us one mail each."

With that said, Mabel dashed straight to Dipper's room, pulling the poor kid by his wrist.

"READ READ READ READ READ READ READ READ READ DAER READ READ READ READ READ READ READ READ READ READ READ READ REEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAD-AH!"

Dipper pulled himself up from the floor and checked the inbox. "Looks like we each both got the same emails from everyone which includes one from Soos, Wendy, both our Grunkles, Pacifica with Candy and Grenda, and Old Man McGucket."

"Open the one from my girlfriends first! Do it!" Mabel jumped up and down in joy.

Dipper smiled from his sister's energetic nature and opened the email. The email contained a picture of the three girls smiling happily for the photo together. Pacifica was without a doubt actually happy to be seen with them.

"I'm really proud of her." Dipper said. "She went from being the worst to being friendly and nice."

"I'll ship you two, next summer." Mabel whispered.

"What was that?"

"I said I'll ship you two, next summer." Mabel said out loud with a huge grin, causing the boy to blush.

"Mabel, really?"

"I'm still working on it." Mabel laughed. "Now read!"

Dipper shook off what Mabel said before and read the email out loud. "Theater style is annoying to read sometimes."

* * *

 _Candy: "_ Dipper, Mabel. We got your email addresses. Yay for us!"

 _Grenda: "Mabel! How do you handle rich boyfriends who don't know the meaning of me-time? I love him a lot and want to make this work, but sometimes people can do something annoying that's not really a the worst thing, but could have some emotional problems if handled wrong. You know what I mean, girl?"_

"Oh I cannot forget this one." Mabel wrote down a reminder. "Dipper, do not be too clinging."

"Whatever you say." Dipper looked at one from Pacifica, who wrote more formally, a small relief to Dipper.

* * *

' _Dear Dipper and Mabel Pines'_

' _I hope you got my package in one piece. From my artistic letter you must already know that I am now friends with your friends, which I hope doesn't end up with a fight for the alpha title. But anyway, I've done quite a good amount of accomplishments during the first week of school. Which includes but not limited to…_

 _-Donating to charity_

 _-Playing a peasant sport called Soccer or football. It's complicated when different continents are involved._

 _\- Swinging on a swing_

 _-And playing with my infant llama I'd named Pearl._

* * *

Dipper scrolled down to a photo of a baby llama playing with a ball. "OH MY GOSH! OOOOHHH MY GOOOOSH!" From seeing the adorable photo, Mabel had no choice but to run around in gush. "Too cute! Too cute! Too cute!" This lasted for a good five minutes.

"Are you done?" the unamused Dipper asked his sister.

"Yep." Mabel said without a sweat. "Read on."

* * *

' _I hope to talk to both of you more. Please keep in touch.'_

 _Candy: "Us too!"_

 _Grenda: "Pacifica spent a lot of time working on that last sentence for some reason. Oh well."_

* * *

"HMMMMMM!" Mabel hummed loudly as she put on her skepticals. "Could this mean a potential match?"

"We only really hung out at that party." Dipper said.

"But would you go on a date with her?" Mabel grinned, making Dipper feel nervous. "Uhhh, we should check the other emails."

"Oh yeah!" Mabel pushed her brother away and opened Soos's. "Yes, Melody already moved in and she's working at the Mystery Shack. Also Wendy's the Handy-Gal now." She turned to her brother and waved her finger. "Now don't you go thinking about what Wendy's new uniform looks like on her."

Dipper rolled his eyes and folded his arms. "I won't ….. darn it, Mabel!"

Mabel laughed as she read out Soos's email.

* * *

' _Yo sup dudes. Being Mr. Mystery is awesome. I came up with so many stories, I wrote an entire journal about it. Also Melody finally moved in and we are awesome at the shack, thanks again for helping me with girls.'_

* * *

"Love Expert right here." Mabel pointed to herself.

* * *

' _Boy I was lucky I had this job my entire life. Melody told me all the boring adult jobs she had to work ever since she graduated high school.'_

* * *

"And here I was complaining about that not so musical place." Mabel said before saying 'blah'.

* * *

' _Also living in the shack is the best. I haven't realized how small my old place was. I don't even miss it. We are planning so many things in the shack to make it more like a house for Abuelita. We've already fixed up the room where those old freaky wax were stored. Also the Larry King Head lives with us. Say hi, Larry.'_

' _So you're using a computer? Tell me about that?'_

' _I'm working on a remote control car for him to drive around in. It's gonna be sweet. Talk to you dudes later. Can't wait to do video chat._ '

* * *

"And I am already working on that." Mabel took out a catalog of different computer cameras. "I'm thinking of a pink one."

Dipper checked the next email and took a deep breath. "Wendy…." He adjusted the Lumberjack hat on top of his head and opened the email.

* * *

' _Sup, dorks. Been doing great here with my boyfriend._ "

* * *

"Boyfriend?!" Dipper shouted in a short panic, but quickly regained himself. He took a deep breath as he reminds himself of their talk after the bunker and what Grunkle Stan had told him.

* * *

' _My bed.'_

* * *

"Wait what?" Dipper scrolled down to see Wendy lounging in bed. "Is she serious?" Dipper scrolled down to see more.

* * *

' _This will be you in a few years and all the way till your dead. Deal with it.'_

* * *

"During the day? Blasphemy!" shouted Mabel.

* * *

' _School's been super boring as usual and now that I know you two exists, we're all bored-er now more than ever. Also don't tell my English teacher I said 'bored-er'_.'

Another photo showed Wendy and her friends making sad faces.

' _We're all still being cool, but we will do anything to get you back here. Hope you have the best teenagehood life will throw at you. If you have any problems that_ _ **DOES NOT**_ _have anything to do with the birds and the bees, just email or call me, I'm all ears. But seriously, ask your folks about the birds and the bees.'_

* * *

Dipper looked back at the first photo to see Wendy wearing his pine tree hat. "She still has it." Dipper placed a hand on Wendy's old hat, fondly remembering his dear friend and crush. "You're so cool."

Mabel could easily tell what Dipper's feeling right now. He's just sitting there with his heads in the clouds without noticing she's painting his nose blue. " _We're getting you a girlfriend_." Mabel thought to herself.

Dipper finally broke his train of thoughts. "Mabel, what does she mean by the birds and bees?"

"NEVER AGAIN!" Mabel shouted, scaring the boy off his chair. Mabel quickly grabbed the keyboard and opened the letter from the Grunkles. "The Grunkles sayzzzzzzz!"

* * *

' _Hey kids. I'm finally using a computer like you darn kids use now. This is Stanley by the way. Stanford's still busy with our trip and refuses to go online again, so he gave me a list for you kids to check out._

' _Dipper Pines, you've done a fine job with the fairies. Now I know to never go by stereotypes, even though I'd almost died countless of times in the past because of going by stereotypes. Anyway, I've done some research on the mysterious flames you've documented and I am not too sure what it could mean. Unless you've uncovered the answer, I'll have to get back to you after our month-long trip to the ocean. I can't wait to share my findings with you after we get back. See you soon and good luck in school'_

' _Now it's your fun uncle's turn again.'_

' _Fairies, what next? So I'm proud to say that Soos is doing a great job at the shack. I just hope his grandmother doesn't girly up the place. I know there's plenty of room here, but it was still my castle. Well Ford's castle, you get the picture. And don't forget if you come across a bully, use nature's snooze button. See ya, kids! Now let's see what all the fuss is about with this internet.'_

' _On second thought, DON'T! Forget it ever existed!'_

' _From your Great Uncles'_

* * *

"So nothing on those flames." Dipper recalled the fire that saved their lives. "I know for a fact that it came from something alive, just what kind of creature was it?"

"We can work on that later with Beethoven and ooooh, Dyami." Mabel sighed. "But still, I hope they'll be safe out in sea. Sharks are nasty man-eating machines."

"They're actually docile and don't technically eat people." Dipper informed his sister. "We're too boney for their taste unlike fish or seals. Did you know they can actually taste with their teeth? Also when one tears off, another tooth behind it takes its place so-"

"Dork alert!" Mabel opened the next email from McGucket.

* * *

' _Dipper, Mabel. I'm living the dream now. I live in that old Northwest Mansion and I'm going to fill it up with stuff I'll buy with money. We he he he. I may have my sanity back, but my personality will stay the same! Only with more manners and what the cool kids say these days, 'hygiene'.'_

' _But lately I was feeling that I'm missing something. Something that money cannot buy. Got any suggestions?'_

* * *

Mabel poked her cheek in pure thoughts. "Tell him friends and family."

"On it." Dipper responded with what Mabel said and sent it right to McGucket. "Wait, doesn't he have issues with his son?"

"Well that message might lead to something." Mabel smiled. "So is that all the emails?"

"Looks like it." Dipper then noticed a new one popping up. "Hey, it's from Dyami."

"MINE!" Mabel jumped in and opened the email.

* * *

' _Dear Dipper and Mabel Pines'_

' _I have just watched the most horrible experience on television. A show called 'Clam and Lips'. As of right now I'm writing a letter to the studio to get it off the air. They should definitely take care of this properly. I've written it very clear so they won't cancel a different show by mistake. Now I'm gonna watch this space travel show I was interested in. I wonder how many seasons it will get.'_

' _Talk to you all later, Dyami'_

* * *

"Clam and Lips?" Mabel said and shivered. "Why don't I like saying that out loud?"

"I wouldn't thing too much about it." Dipper closed the window and opened up a word document. "So, what do you want to write to everyone?"

"Everything!" The twins began their emails to all their friends, playfully arguing with one another on what to say and who should type it and arguing with the computer about the photo limit use.

.

.

.

"Why is my nose blue?!"

 **End of Chapter**

 **Random Sketch Time**

Mabel was standing outside dressed in futuristic yet barbaric looking black and yellow armor with a strange glass device on her face and a bald wig on top of her head. "Dipper, what does the scouter say about our view counts?"

Dipper was dressed similarly to his sister but with blue instead of black armor and a black spiky wig. He sighed with annoyance and took his own device off his face. "It's over 9,000." He said with no emotion as he crushes the cardboard and plastic made prop. "So now what?"

"Done!" Mabel threw off the bald wig and ran off with a jolly laugh.

Seeing that this as another pointless game for Mabel, Dipper removed his wig and sighed once more. "Gosh darn it, Mabel."

 **Cloa lkiv ifpqbkba ql qexq exjpqbo plkd. Pqxkibv lk qeb lqebo exka….**

 **A/N:** There was a question about making fanart from here about where to upload it. Well I suggest posting it on deviantart.

But please know that I cannot personally contact any guest users. However if you do have a deviantart account, I'm also on there as well. I go by the same username and you should see these chapters already on there.

Also I will not answer any questions with these similar topics. "Dipifica? Are you sinking Wendip?"


	13. Can You Forgive Me?

**Chapter 13** : Can You Forgive Me?

It's been nearly a week and a half since Old Man McGucket moved into the Northwest Mansion. With all the money he made selling his ideas to the government, he was able to purchase not just the mansion but also most of their possessions such as furniture, kitchen supply, and even their hired help.

"Would you care for another serving of bacon, Sir McGucket?" A butler asked the very busy prospector who was working on a drawing.

"I'm good as a whistle." McGucket said as he put great thoughts into whatever he's doing. "Raccoon Wife, you hungry?"

Then McGucket's Raccoon wife leaped out of nowhere and wolfed down the plate of bacon.

"You are welcome." The butler said with no reaction to the disease carrying mammal hissing at him.

McGucket looked at his latest project. "I see …. I still don't get it." McGucket turned this drawing around to reveal a masterpiece of a painting showing an old wealthy man who looked depressed. "I've made hundreds of these and I still can't understand any hidden symbolism." He took out a blow torch and incinerated the artwork that could have gone for a good amount of cash the Northwest wished they could bath in.

McGucket sighed and walked over to a couch. Looking depressed, his wife nuzzled up next to him. "I don't understand it, Raccoon Wife? Ever since I gained my sanity and made millions, I feel like something's missin'."

Suddenly a tone played on his laptop. McGucket reached over to the computer and smiled with joy. "Those Pines Twins send me a message! Maybe they answered my question." McGucket opened the email and read the three words they twins responded. 'Friends and Family'

"Wow, of course!" McGucket laughed and did a little dance. "People love each other and money is soulless. Why haven't I figured that out before?" McGucket swirled his wife around, irritating the animal.

"Now let's see how many friends I have." McGucket counted out random people. "There's Dipper, Mabel, Stanford, Stanley, Soos, Wendy, Blubs, Durland, heck. I got a lot of em. Now for family ….. oh right." McGucket held onto his hat. "That really explains why I'm all sad."

The old man experienced a flashback of his son pushing him away from his life.

"My son still hates me and I still don't know why …. Wait a minute. I have my sanity back. I can just remember right now." McGucket thought way back to his early years of him and his son.

(Flashback)

"Congratulation, it's a boy!" a doctor said on a very special delivery. He handed the newborn named Tate McGucket to the mother. "Say, where's your husband?"

Elsewhere, the younger McGucket was working on his homemade computers.

.

"Home run!" Tate made the winning shot and everyone cheered, minus his father who was still working on his computers.

.

"Wow, that was a great date." An attractive girl said to a teenaged Tate. "We should go again next week."

"Good news!" McGucket said out of nowhere. "We're moving to Gravity Falls! Far enough to destroy any chance of growing bonds with people here."

.

"Tate McGucket, you are now a graduate!" Tate received his High School diploma. "Now you have a healthy history in the most advance college in the world!"

Then one of McGucket's giant death robots attacked.

"On second thought, no."

(End Flashback)

"Wow … was I really that clichéd back then?" McGucket felt his head, feeling all the guilt hidden within his mind for years. "No wonder why he hates me …. Hey, why not apologies? But what if he won't forgive me? Do I really deserve it?" He looked at his reflection in the mirror, old and frail, but he took a deep breath and glance back with determination. "At least I'll get closer for all of this."

The raccoon snarled.

"Really, you'll support me?" He hugged his wife, despite the flesh wound he's receiving. "Thank you, honey. Now let's go talk to our son ….. well my son. You ….. well he'll probably just call you raccoon." The raccoon looked at her husband with irritation.

.

.

.

"Well, here we are." McGucket and Raccoon Wife arrived at the Gravity Falls Lake and walked up to Nate's cabin. "Here goes nothing."

McGucket took a deep breath and knocked on the door. It only took a few seconds before Tate McGucket stepped out, with a hose. "For the last time. We took only had one wagon ride together for just the spirit of Pioneer Day! I'm not interested Lazy Eye Su-" He then realized it was just his father and his animal wife. "Oh, it's just you." he spoke with irritation.

"H-Hey s-s-son." McGucket said nervously. "Remember when I regained my sanity and made millions?"

"Yep." Nate said, unamused.

"Well for a few days I was feeling like something was missing, until today." McGucket fiddled his fingers a bit. "I realized that I have a broken family. And I was the poor fool who had the hammer."

McGucket shortly explained to Tate about the sudden flashbacks he had, and Tate showed no change in his expression.

"So what I as trying to say that … I'm sorry for being a click-e. I mean cliché. Do you think you can ever forgive me?"

Tate stood there silently. Every speechless moment made the prospector more nervous. "He won't forgive me, will he?" Then his raccoon wife started nibbling on his leg, for food. This helped calmed his nerves a bit before Tate finally spoke.

"Just to be clear, this won't lead to you bribing me with your money, won't it?"

"Of course not!" McGucket said with a higher tone. "I may be some ignore-your-own-son dad who gone crazy for 30 years, but I'm not that kind of old guy who buys love. I earn it with hard work and giving love back. Which is how I found this beauty right here!"

McGucket pointed to his raccoon wife who's … doing animal things.

"And I know you have a lot more to say." McGucket lowered his head. "So …. Go ahead."

Tate stood there silently, collecting all this thoughts for this day he hadn't ever considered will come. "Dad …" he said with a stern voice. "You've practically ignored me for my entire life. Sometimes I find it hard to believe you know I existed. Heck, you even ruined my chance with that girl and my future."

Each word Tate said to him hurt his little heart bit by bit, leaving only more grief to burden with.

"And not to mention all those evil inventions ever since you gone crazy after ….. after whatever happened." Tate looked at his father. There he was finally acknowledging his father's wrong doings for all these years, but yet even after all this, he was never told what actually happened through the days he was losing his minds.

"But …." Tate kneeled down to him. "This is literally the first time we ever actually talked, or at least bonded in some way."

McGucket eyes widened.

"I'm not saying I forgive you right off the bat, but maybe we should … talk some more. Like what happened with you and Stanford, and that circle and the one triangle guy." Tate took another breath as the two cops strolled around in the distance. "So … want to come in …. And her?"

McGucket could feel it in his heart that a small amount of guilt have been lifted. It wasn't all of it, but yet enough to bring a dimmer of light to his weary mind. "Well don't mind if me and the misses do." McGucket carried his wife inside as Nate shook his head.

"But I still think you're crazy."

"When life gives you lemons!"

So father and son entered the house to finally have a long awaited talk. Meanwhile in the background, Officer Blubs and Deputy Durland were tearing at the whole thing.

"That was bea-utiful." Durland said as he dabbed his tears.

Blubs took the napkin Durland had and blew in it. "Durland, I can think of something more beautiful. But this kind of thing here only happens once to some people."

The cops continued to cry as they enjoy his company. "But that McGucket guy married an animal!" Durland suddenly spoke in a harsh tone.

"Oh I hear you." Blubs's emotional state withered away. "A person and an animal living together. What an abomination."

"Why did the government allow this sort of thing to happen?" Durland asked. "The next thing you know people will start wanting to marry plants, then fungi, then germs, and finally … inanimate objects."

Blubs started crying. "Why must the sacred tradition of marriage be violated with such disgusting desires, Whyyyyy?!"

 **End of Chapter**

 **Qeb zlmp grpq alk'q ifhb fkqbopmbzfbp obixqflkpefm, xka vbq x cold xka x mfd xob L.H. rkibpp qebv xob mrmmbqp.**


	14. Bill's Back

**Chapter 14:** Bill's Back

"DIPPER DIPPER!" Mabel ran into Dipper's room, flailing her sleeve-covered arms in a panic. Dipper was doing his homework and fell off his chair by shock. "WE'RE IN HUUUUGE TROUBLE!"

Dipper quickly rose, trying to get Mabel to speak clearly. "Mabel, what's wrong?"

"It's …. It's …." Mabe started sniffing. "It's about Gravity Falls. We're doomed."

"Wh-What do you mean?" Dipper looked into the horror-filled eyes of his dear sister.

"….Bill's Back."

"…No …. No!" Dipper shook his sister in panic. "That can't be true!"

"Aprils Fools!" Mabel smiled and gave her brother a raspberry. "You should eat more fruits. Have a raspberry."

Dipper just glared at Mabel, clearly not appreciating the joke. "Mabel, you almost gave me a heart attack. And it's still September."

Mabel grinned widely. "It's April Fools in the real world."

"Real world?" Dipper asked before a disturbing looking man walked in.

"Good Morning."

"Daaaaaah!" Dipper screamed and jumped in front of his sister. "Who are you and what do you want?!" Dipper grabbed a golf club to defend his sister.

"You're being paranoid again." Mabel said as she walked to the man. "This is our Uncle Grandpa."

"Wwwwhat?"

"Don't worry, none of this is canon." From his pouch he took out an actual cannon. "But this is!"

He aimed it towards the window and placed his head inside. After saluting, the head was shot through the house and landed right at a nearby boat.

Dipper was jabbering nonsense as his brain tried comprehending on what is happening.

"Don't worry, Dipper. That was our ship." Mabel said after looking through a telescope. "By the way, we're getting a live action movie."

"Whaaa?"

"Directed by Michael Bay!" Mabel ran around in a panic. "Do you have any idea what he'll do to Wendy?"

"W-Wendy?!" Dipper grabbed his sister again, demanding answers. "Who's Bay? Will he hurt Wendy? Does he have her right now?!" He shook his sister more violently. "I swear if he touched her I'll-"

"Do not threat, for I am here."

Dipper turned to see the well-known red head. "Oh thank Hirsch you're alright ….. you're the wrong Wendy."

"With an evil voice." Uncle Grandpa added as they lay their eyes on the fast-food icon. However this Wendy was far different than what you would expect. She was dressed in purple and scarlet, decorated with gold and precious stones and pearls.

"Dipper, come to me. You shall have me." Wendy drank from a golden cup filled with a horrid liquid. "I can be the Wendy you desire." Suddenly her image shifted into that of the Corduroy girl. "You've desired this for a very long time, haven't you?"

Dipper, Mabel, and Uncle Grandpa slowly stood back in fear as a multi-headed dragon flew in from the wall. Wendy climbed onto the beast and laugh. "Come, I thirst for blood."

"Do you have any brothers?" Mabel asked, turning oblivious as usual.

"Mabel, now is not the time!" Dipper grabbed the boy-crazed Mabel and the three jumped out the window and landed on a trampoline which Uncle Grandpa quickly provided.

"Go on without me! I can handle her." Uncle Grandpa rolled up the skin on his arms and spit on his hands. "Time to show this lady what it truly means to be a football player."

Dipper and Mabel ran off, without looking back at the horrifying battle that took place at the home they grew up in.

"I still don't understand!" Dipper shouted as his mind goes crazy. "What next?!"

Then a portal appeared before them and a young man ran in and collided with the twins. "Hey, watch where you're gooooooo hellllloooooooo." Mabel stood up with her puppy dog eyes set on a man who looked panic.

"Callaghan! Where ….. Where am I?" Before the man could think, fire appeared from the portal. All three ducked in time and the portal closed. "But wait, what?!" The man looked around the suburban area in daylight. "What just happened? Where am I? Where's Callaghan and Hiro?!"

"Marry me!" Mabel latched onto the man's leg.

"Wha…"

"I'm just as lost as you." Dipper sighed. "Wonder how's he-" Then Uncle Grandpa crashed into the ground like a falling airplane.

"I'm O.K."

"Hey, that's mine line!" Eugene from Hey Arnold! said, before being pushed off screen by Dipper.

"No more! NOOOOO More!" Dipper started pulling his hair. "Alright, what are we going to do about that Wendy-imposter and her pet mooooooooo WHAT IS THAT!?"

"Sorry, that was my fault." Uncle Grandpa said. "I thought ducktape will do the trick. But all it did was turned the two into a single, kaiju-sized ballerina."

The two sane ones at the time looked in complete awe, confusion, and mostly shock at the giant woman dancing around the suburban area in grace.

"Giant woman!" shouted Steven Universe.

"How did that happened?" Lapis Lazuli came in, but Steven pushed her away.

"No, no more leaks!"

"I give up." Dipper and the man sat down, defeated. "So who are you anyway?"

"My name's Tadashi." The man said. "And I was running into a burning building to save my-" Then a Pokeball was hurled at his head and captured the poor man.

"Wow, a brand new Pokemon!" Then a boy walked over and picked the Pokeball up. "I'll use him to beat the Fire Gym Leader and soon the world will realize how awesome I am, Rusty the New Pokemon Master!"

"GIVE HIM BACK!" Mabel pounced on the boy and mauled him like a bear.

"Sweeet. Hey Strong Mad, The Cheat, check this fight out." Strong Bad said as his two buddies cheered on Mabel. "Tear his freakin limbs off!"

The Cheat said something in his own tongue.

"I don't care what this is rated. It will probably be changed to T after _theeeeeeey_ show up. Wink wink."

"Place your bets, people. Twenty five cents!" shouted Eddy as Double D and Ed worked on their stand. "We don't take credit."

"But we're happy with bats. Right Eddy?" Ed said stupidly.

"A Bat Credit Card!" The Nostalgia Critic shouted, randomly shooting his gun in the sky.

"Criiiiitiiiiiiic!" shouted the Angry Video Game Nerd.

"NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRD!" The two started wailing on each other as Eddy raised his prices.

"Mabel!" shouted Bobobo dressed at Obe wan Kenobi from the crowd. "Use your special technique!"

"Right away." Mabel said and faced the now beaten and crying Rusty. "Super Fist of the Waddles!"

She held her beloved pig in front of Rusty, but then a heavenly glow appeared from the swine. The shining light casted its reach as far as the eye can see, blinding everyone who dare look upon it.

.

.

.

Dipper and Mabel were in Dipper's room. All the repairs have been fixed and everyone else seemed to have vanished.

"….. WHAT THE HECK JUST HAPPENED?!" Dipper held his head and paced around the room. "There was that guy, then that girl demon thing, then that college guy, then them and that and this and AAAAAAH!" He collapsed onto the floor. "Do you have any comments on this, Mabel?"

"I prefer Hiro."

Dipper groaned. "What the heck was all that? What was all that….?"

"Hey dude."

Dipper sprung right up form hearing that voice. "Wendy?" Dipper ran up to the teenager. "Please tell me you're the real Wendy."

Wendy performed her usual zipped lip gesture. "It's me. And I was thinking that ….. thirteen and fifteen is close enough." Dipper's mind went as ease. Wendy bent down with a blushing face. "I … I think I love you, you dork."

"All that chaos was worth it."

Dipper and Wendy embraced each other in a passionate kiss. The shear impact it had on them made them realized they were truly meant for each other.

"Too bad none of this is canon." Mabel added, making her brother groaned loudly. "Take it away, Rick Roll!"

'We're no strangers to love. You know the rules and so do I. A full commitment's what I'm thinking of. You wouldn't get this from any other guy. I just wanna tell you how much I'm feeling. Gotta make you understand.'

'Never gonna give you up. Never gonna let you done. Never gonna-.'

"ALRIGHT! I GET IT! SHOW'S OVER!" Dipper shouted as he marched away.

 **End of Chapter**

 **Pillc ifomx**


	15. Stan-O War II

**Chapter 15:** Stan-O War II

"Finally finished." Stanley swiped some sweat off his forehead and marveled at the completed Stan-O War II. "You know, Pointdexter, if we actually got the first Stan-O War in the water, we'll sink like bricks."

Stanford secured the boat onto the transporter hooked to the back of Stanley's car. "Maybe it was a good thing you broke my invention in high school." Ford laughed a bit. "Actually now that I think of it, if we haven't broken apart, we'll never come to Gravity Falls in the first place. Which means that Bill Cipher would have found another eager mind to help him into our dimension."

"Good thing I punched him in the eye, inside my mind!" Stanley said in a high tone. "You got a point there, Ford. This is the only place I was able to scam people and get gold. Take that, dad!" Stanley shouted as he points to the sky. "Oops, wrong direction."

"Dad …" Ford sighed softly. "Stanley. I've been meaning to ask you." His twin brother looked at him. "It's about the family? Shermie and his family, mom and dad? I've practically shun them from my life in favor of studying Gravity Falls."

Stanley's smile slowly faded. "I knew this will come." Stanley rubbed his neck. "Well I guess I should get with the happy stuff first." He cleared his throat. "Well for Shermie, it all started when mom and dad …. meeeh, and Shermie and his fiancé came over to the shack."

(Flashback)

A knock came from the Mystery Shack's main museum. A thirty-ish younger Stanley Pines . Stanford Pines at the time answered. "Welcome to the Mystery Shack! You seek answers? Thrill? ….. uhhh. Hey … Shermie."

"Stanford Pines, what happened?" Shermie Pines, whose face resembles the two Stans, but not that much, looked at his older brother in confusion. "Mom and Dad said you're some scientists now and ..." He stopped himself and kept focus. "Look, I know we don't really know each other, since you left me and the folks alone after what you call research and just barely contacted me alone, but I …. Wait a minute." Shermie got a closer look. "You're not Stanford!"

Stanley gasped as Shermie took out an old photo. "Wait, you're …. You're ….. Stanley?! My long lost brother!"

"O.K., take it easy there." Stanley motioned his hands to calm his younger brother down.

"But you, you died!" He grabbed his brother's shoulders. "There's no doubt about it, no scientists have muscles like these."

"Thanks for that, but listen bro. Hold your-"

"But then … where's Stanford? What happened to your twin-"

Stanley covered his confused brother's mouth. "Look, it's really hard to explain. But you have to see this for yourself, yours and my eyes only."

"And what may that be?" a woman walked next to Shermie.

"What are you, a cop?"

"Yes; and your sister-in law, Shelly." Shelly, soon to share the Pines name; stared at the man with suspicion. She had chestnut hair and resembles Mabel a bit.

"Wait wait wait, before we jump to conclusions, you should see this."

"Honey." Shermie held his fiancé's hand. "Whatever it is, I'm sure we will understand."

.

.

.

"There is nothing about this I understand."

(Cut flashback)

"Wait, Shermie and his wife knew about the portal and what happened thirty years ago?" Ford asked with disbelief.

"Yes sir. Took a lot of explaining to do." He waved his hand. "Relax. I left out all the dangerous stuff that portal can do so there was no charges."

Ford irritatingly glared at his brother.

"No need to worry about those two, they're both six feet under now ….. no wait I'm thinking of our fooooolllllllll-"

"You don't have to finish that one. I can easily suspect that." Ford thought back about his parents that he pretty much left behind. "So Shermie's still alive?"

"You bet." Stanley smiled; glad to avoid the rough topic for now. "With my help, they've managed to find a place down in California, where they had our nephew and later on he found the love of his life and together they made Dipper and Mabel Pines. Heh, Dipper and Mabel, there's another good thing about our fight."

"Wow …. Wow…." Was all that Ford could say before collecting his thoughts. "It was for the best. How …. bizarrely odd."

"It's like it was some mysterious creator who planned it all." Stanley said. "Wonder what he would be like. I bet he's the greatest guy in the world to create me. Just listen to this unique voice of mine."

"And mine, dude." Soos said off-screen.

"Why does all this seem shallow?" Ford asked himself. "So how's he been lately?"

"Doing pretty good." Stanley said. "He and the misses had some pretty good jobs and now both are retired. They usually stop by here once in a while, but mostly visit the kids. They're probably with Dipper, Mabel, and their folks right now."

(Meanwhile)

"So ….." Mr. Pines said as he and his wife sat in the living room as he spoke to his parents. "You knew about the portal and identity swapping, and you'd never told us?!"

Shermie, looking pretty healthy for his late-middle age, folded his arms. "Would you actually believe me?"

"…..Good point."

Mabel, who was sitting on the floor, was counting with her fingers. "Hey Grandma and Grandpa. How old were you guys when you had dad? And Mom and Dad, how old were you two when you had Dipper and me?"

"Uhhhhhhh."

(Back at Gravity Falls)

"Which reminds me. I haven't contacted Shermie about all this. He'll be thrilled to meet the actual scientist."

"That will be nice." Stanford smiled, recalling the few only times he'd actually contacted his baby brother. "But not now. By tomorrow, we'll leave Gravity Falls with our Stan-O-War II." He wrapped his arm around Stanley's shoulder. "Just the two of us and the mysteries waiting to be discovered."

"And don't forget the gold and babes." Stanley smiled. "Wonder what mermaids look like at age 70?"

Stanford laughed, but his stomach turned by the question he really wished he didn't need to ask. "Stanley." He took a deep breath. "If it's not too much, I just ….."

"Mom and Dad." Stanley took a soda and took a sip. "They're gone now. Mom died first from picking up smoking. Then a stroke from Dad because of fast food." Stanley rubbed the back of his neck. "And since I was the only family member, Shermie and Shelly moved over to this side of the country."

"So …. Did you ever attend their funeral?"

"And pass off as you? They'll figure me out the moment I show my tough face there." He took another sip from his soda. "Besides, it was in their will that I, well you, weren't allowed at the funerals. Since you know, you cut yourself off from the world and didn't send them money."

Stanford felt the burden of grief being dropped onto him like an avalanche.

"And I faked my own death, so there you go. I got nothing else."

Stanford looked at his brother as he gulped down his soda. "So, what about when you faked that car crash. Did they ever try calling you?"

"Not even a single letter." Stanley crushed the can. "I'm sure Shermie knows exactly what they think of us, but I'll never ask. Never in a million years." Stanley chuckled. "Like they would want me at their funeral anyway. Dad was quick enough to throw me out. I don't need him or mom at all. She was probably laughing with him till they kicked the bucket."

"Stanley." Stanford placed his hand on his shoulder. "Mom was upset when Dad kicked you out, and Dad …. He didn't give a comment. But they …. They did turn back to normal in a week, like you'd never even left." Stanford fiddled his hand a bit. "We've never talked about you again. I don't even know how they truly felt after all this. I'm … I'm sorry for whatever you had to go through."

Stanley stood there silently, thinking deeply about what to say. "I know I can't just forget about them, but what we should focus on is right now." He smiled and hugged his twin bro. "We're back together and we already have Dipper and Mabel and their folks in California, along with our baby brother. And right here we have Soos and Wendy."

The two could hear Soos crying.

"I'll probably think about our folks the moment we stop talking, but the ocean is where we'll be. Finding gold and babes, and doing all those mystery stuff. Well except for kids, they'll all be in school."

A loud groan was heard, coming from the redhead herself.

"Now let's go get some beverages with their labels removed and celebrate." The elder Pines Twins laughed together as they headed to town to celebrate their finally happy future and leave their depressed past where it belongs, in the past, but not forgotten.

 **End of Chapter**

 **Xmmxobkqiv Xibu Efopze fp hbbmfkd nrfbq lk tel qeb yxyv fp …. Pl qebob dlbp jv ebxazxklk.**


	16. Bloody Mary

**Chapter 16:** Bloody Mary

"Again, sorry for how my sisters acted towards you. I'm literally the only level headed one there." At the Pines residence, a tomboy fairy was speaking to Dipper, Mabel, Beethoven and Dyami. "By the way, the name's Lightning." She had light blue skin, wore a plain green dress with matching green hair, and also it looks like she'd painted lightning bolts on her wings. "So here, have a Bloody Mary." Two more fairies brought in a cup of Bloody Mary.

"Uhhhhh, we can't drink that." Dipper told the fairy before turning to his friends. "And I hope none of you ever go below the influence. Especially you Mabel."

"And break Waddle's heart? As if." She picked up her pig and nuzzled their noses together.

The fairy laughed. "You guys are crazy. And everyone else will call you crazy if you try revealing us to the world. Am I right?" she gave them a somewhat threatening smile.

Dipper smiled. "Trust me; I won't try exposing something like you again."

"Again?" She flew onto Dipper's shoulder. "You've seen the Supernatural before?"

"Oh you wouldn't believe what my sister and I have seen back in Gravity Falls, Oregon."

"Gravity Falls?!" She flew right back up in shock. "You were at Gravity Falls?"

Dipper's heart leaped in hopes of possible more answers and questions. "Yes! We've discovered so much!" He took out his Great Uncles complete journal volume and flipped through the pages. "Mind asking some questions about your kind?"

The fairy looked over at the great details of information and images. "Wow, you wrote this?"

"Well it belongs to my Great Uncle." Dipper said. "He'd been studying the paranormal in Gravity Falls for a long time."

The fairy was very intrigued with what she found. Everything was right to the point, minus their interests. "No wonder why my sisters lost their tops back there."

"I'm not thinking that at all! I'm a gentleman that Mabel likes."

Everyone turned to Beethoven, and eventually ignored him.

"Well …. You seem to have everything here. Minus our anatomy which I refuse to go over." She folded her arms. "But I'll say this, that park is the only place in this whole city where you'll find all the strange stuff. Except for a few hauntings, but ghosts are scary."

"Really, so can you tell us more? Like werewolves, demons, elves?"

As Dipper asked more questions, Mabel was having a brainstorm. "Ghosts … Bloody Mary … EEEEEE!" Mabel squealed. "We should try out Bloody Mary!"

"Mabel, you said you wouldn't." Dipper said, disappointed in his sister.

"Not the drink, the urban legend."

Dyami liked the idea; however he had to be the one to burst her bubble. "Mabel, that's actually just an illusion your brain makes when you spin around and turn the lights back on. Dipper should go into more detail about it."

"Nuh-uh. He makes no sense."

"Actually, that whole Bloody Mary think is true." Lightning spoke.

Dipper was quick to ask about it.

"That spinning part and lights off part is right, but you need an offering." Lightning had the fairies carry the Bloody Mary. "And this is what you need."

Beethoven raised his hand. "Can you be present? I don't want Mr. and Mrs. Pines to think we drink."

"Trust me; it'll be gone in a second."

The kids and fairies went into the bathroom, closed the drapes, and turned the lights off, except for one. "Sorry, forgot these bolts glow-in-the-dark." Lightning covered her wings with a towel.

"O.K. ready?" Dipper asked, before the lights immediately turned back on. "Beethoven!"

The shivering wannabe-bully glanced at everyone. "I was …. Making sure no assassins are hiding. Yeah." He flexed his fatty arm. "Always on the look-out."

Dipper grunted and pushed Beethoven back to his position. "O.K., let's try this."

He turned off the lights, and the kids swirled two times, then the lights when back on by Mabel this time. "I have to go. Now GO!"

They rushed out to allow Mabel to finish. "Done." She washed her hands and let everyone back in.

"Are we ready now?" Dipper asked impatiently. He looked over at Dyami raising his hand. "I have to go too."

After another bathroom break, the kids finally began their ritual.

"Bloody Mary, Bloody Mary, Bloody Mary!"

Dipper immediately turned the lights on. The first image they saw on the mirror was not their reflections, but that of something else!

"AAAAAH!" Beethoven jumped on Dipper in fear. "It's hideous!"

"Why I beg your pardon."

The kids looked back in awe at the horrific spirit was in fact just some woman dressed in some 1500s royalty clothing. "Children, again? Why do they keep trying to call me?" she spoke in a rich-snooty accent. "At least you have the Bloody Mary." The kids gasped as she reached out from the mirror and took the drink. "So you must be here for the history lesson."

"History lesson?" the kids glanced at each other and looked at the fairy, rolling on the towel shelf in pure laughter.

"But-But, what just happened?" Dipper asked the spirit. "Are you Bloody Mary?"

She took a sip from the beverage. "That was my nickname after I ordered the execution almost 300 Protestants. By the way …" she looked down at the children as if they've broken a simple school rule. "Are any of you Protestant?"

"Should we even mention our beliefs/nonbelief?" Mabel asked Dipper.

"For the sake of having a normal conversation that relates with what's going on right now instead of unworthy debaters from both sides shouting at each other, no." Dipper informed her.

Mary cleared her throat. "Now it's time to tell my life story. Oh and no leaving." With some ghost powers she locked the door, right after Lightning and her two fairies slowly slipped away. "I was the only child of Henry VIII and Catherine of Aragon to survive my childhood. At age four I would perform for French delegation with a virginal. I learned to read and write at the age of nine and studied French, Spanish, music, dance, and perhaps Greek. Henry VIII doted on his daughter and boasted to the Venetian ambassador Sebastian Giustiniani, "This girl never cries". Also-"

"Stop right there! You're just reading a mikipedia article on your phone!" Dyami pointed out to the small device in Mary's hand.

"Awuwuw what?" Mabel asked as she and Beethoven were slowly falling asleep.

Mary put the phone away and folded her arms. "What, it's been over five hundred years since death. How the bloody heck should I remember, especially since where I'm currently living at?" She looked behind her to see a huge wall of flames and a thousand souls crying in agony. "Apparently killing Protestants as 'a bad thing'." She said; making air quotes on the 'bad' part. "Well I already got my drink." Then a quick yellow blur flew by and took the drink off her. "How dare you, my new annoying neighbor! When will you ever leave?"

Mary hung up and the spell on the door was lifted.

"Well that was something." Beethoven said.

The four kids walked back to the living room to see Lighting still laughing. "I … I got you guys good!"

They glared at her with irritation, but Mabel quickly joined her. "She really did get us good!" She playfully shoved her brother.

"So what was that for?"

Lighting slowly calmed down after feeling her thighs. "That's just to show you how boring the paranormal stuff here is like."

"Boring?" Dyami asked. "How can all the paranormal in that park be boring? Sure that urban legend turned out to be a joke, but everything else has to be interesting."

"Sorry." She floated to Dipper. "You should just pretend all that stuff isn't there. They've been doing fine without humans getting in their way, and it's better that way."

"Aw come on. Everything can be made fun with Mabel." Mabel proclaimed. "Except homework and other dorky things my brother does."

Dipper quietly grunted at his sister's remark and showed Lightning the journal. "There has to be something interesting. Like Gnomes, Chupacabras, aliens, zombies, or how about some secret researcher who had documented everything and suddenly disappeared for thirty years of less?" Dipper suddenly noticed Lightning stiffing up a bit. She glanced at the boy and pushed his lumberjack had down.

"Sorry, everything besides me and my girls are a dud. It's best that no one goes snooping around before getting hurt."

"Getting hurt you say?" Dipper smiled. "As in something in this park could be dangerous, thus meaning that it's not as boring as you said it is."

Lighting noticed the smug smile on the boy's face as the others looked at her with suspicion. She's been beaten. "O.K., look. There are a lot of things here. Very remarkable stuff with secrets, power, mysteries, tear-jerking backstories, craziness, you get the point … and I hope you're not that kind of wise guy who'll point out that secrets and mysteries are the same thing."

Dipper informed her that he's not that kind of guy. "Like I said, you have _nooooo_ idea what my sister and I have been through at Gravity Falls. I'm sure we can handle it."

Lightning placed her fists on her hips and pouted. "Looks like I can't stop you. But you should really know this." Lightning floated closer to them. "There are a lot of dangerous stuff here that should really really REALLY be left alone. And if you come across them, you can count on the protector to help you to safety only." She snapped her fingers which called forth her two fairies. "Buttercup, Toph. It's time to go." The three flew out the window before Lightning gave another warning. "Seriously, don't go too deep into all this."

Mabel waved the fairies goodbye and closed the window. "That was fun."

Dipper thought deeply on Lightning's words. "So there's probably just as many mysteries here just like Gravity Falls, but what does she mean be protector?" Dipper recalled the moment Lightning froze when Dipper mentioned some researcher.

"You're thinking the same thing as me?" Dyami asked.

"You mean like someone tried researching the phenomena here and suddenly vanished, like my Grunkle Ford?" Dipper asked, receiving a positive response from Dyami's grin.

"Probably not exactly the same way your uncle did, they could have been more. Maybe something ate them, or turned them to stone, or accelerate their age until they turn to dust, or-"

"I-I-I'm not scared!" Beethoven informed everyone. "I … I can handle them." His ego showed off. "I'll beat the Thanksgiving stuffing out of anything that gets in our way!"

"I'll back you up." Mabel said as she wields her Grappling Hook. "Today we make our true home just like Gravity Falls. Except for the woods, and our Grunkles, and Soos, and Wendy, and Candy, and Grenda, and Gompers, and Blubs, and Durland, and Mayor Tyler, and Toby Determined, and Lazy Eye Susan, and that crazy lifeguard … I miss Gravity Falls."

Mabel sat down and directed herself towards Sweatertown. Dipper sat down beside to comfort her. "Don't feel bad, Mabel. We'll see them again next summer. Heck, we're going there for Thanksgiving."

Mabel poked her head up. "Thanks, Dipper. I can't wait till Thanksgiving. Now if only the people recognized how great of a holiday it is and leave Christmas where it belongs!" She stood on top of the coffee table. "You hear me? I'll restore Thanksgiving to its rightful place among holidays!"

"But not before we finish our homework." Dipper reminded her and instantly received a wet raspberry from his sister.

 **End of Chapter**

 **Txp qexq Yfii? Fp eb abxa? Xibu hkltp efp cxkp xii qll tbii.**

 **O.C.**

 **Lighting:** Leader of the tomboy fairies with a cool attitude like Wendy, but enjoys hard work and have great leadership skills.


	17. Schmebulock's Epic Quest

**Chapter 17:** Schmebulock's Epic Quest

"Well Fordie, after nearly fifty something years, we're finally going on your adventure." Stanley and Ford have passed the town's limit several hours ago and are on their way towards the Atlantic Ocean … across the country. "Good thing I'm loaded." Stanley said, looking at the gas meter and a few gold bars near his foot.

"I still can't believe what's going on in the Middle East." Ford said as he checked a newspaper. "And why does something tell me both sides are to blame."

"Let's not dive into that mess now. We're on our way to the great unknown with treasure and babes waiting for us! But first we must feast!" They pulled into a restaurant and blocked several open parking spaces with their boats. "Now let's stay her for a few hours and ignore all complaints."

Unbeknownst to them, they had a mysterious stowaway in the Stan-O War II. When the two brothers walked into the restaurant, a single Gnome poked his head out.

"Schmebulock."

The Gnome who could only say his name hopped out of the boat and looked around. "Schmebulock." He walked around the parking lot and found a bus about to leave. He walked into it without being noticed and took a seat right next to an old lady.

The old lady looked at the old man and sighed with disgust. "Kids today, they just want to skip their childhood in a blink of an eye."

"Schmebulock."

The bus drove all the way into a large city and let out everyone for the day. Schmebulock stumbled out and looked around the unfamiliar lights and sounds that felt foreign to even the town of Gravity Falls. "Schmebulock."

He walked through the city and saw some amazing statues and architecture designs, and yet no one realize yet that he's a Gnome. "Schmebulock."

Schmebulock then stumbled upon a rally where a runner for the president of the United State was having a press conference. "And that is why building a giant wall across the border will not bankrupt me, I mean us." Then you know what it means noticed Schmebulock in the front of the crowd. "Hey you, what do you think about all this?"

"Schmebulock."

The man looked at the gnome confusedly. "Oh I see. that must be a Spanish word. Are you a Mexicanian?"

"Schmebulock."

"That must be an insult." The man glared at the gnome. "Well when I become president, I'll have every American wear big shoes. How'd you like that, huh?"

"Schmebulock."

The man started getting irritated. "A wise guy, huh? Well our mother-"

"Schmebulock."

"AHEM! Your mother-"

"Schmebulock."

"YOUR ….. MOTHER-"

"Schmebulock."

"Oh that does it!" The man ran off the stage to beat the living stuffing out of Schmebulock, but unfortunately he tripped on his own feet and bonked his head on the stage. "O… where …. Who am I?"

"Schmebulock."

"S…Schmebulock?"

"Schmebulock."

"Schmeeeeeeebulock."

"Schmebulock."

"Schmebulock."

"Schmebulock."

The man stood up and returned to his stand to continue his speech. "Schmebulock. Schmebulock. Schmebulock. SCHMEBULOCK!" Everyone cheered as Schmebulock walked away.

Schmebulock climbed onto another bus and rode all the way to a random farm. "Schmebulock." He got off to see a farmer around his cows.

"Welp, looks like you'll all be sent off into the glue factory. I can't just turn you into steak; that will be too gruesome."

The farmer walked away as the cows looked worried for their own safety.

"Schmebulock."

The cows looked down to the gnomes and mooed.

"Schmebulock."

The cows took his words by heart, or what they think he said, and caused an uproar. "Hey, what in tarn nation?!" The farmer returned. "What's with you soon to be dead cows? You're acting like you're time is coming to an end."

The cows mooed louder as they slowly approached the farmer. "Hey now, take it easy there. I'll … I'll turn you into steak. You like that instead?"

Schmebulock watched as the cows chased him off the farm and all the animals cheered. The cows picked Shmebulock up and all the farm animals decided to make them their king.

"Schmebulock."

Schmebulock spent the next few days there as all the farm animals decide to rise up against all humans.

"Ba-bak?" A frightful chicken asked Schmebulock.

"Schmebulock."

"Baaak!" the chicken appeared to be addressing an unstoppable enemy.

"Schmebulock."

"Ba-baaaaak." The chicken looked over to see the impending threat coming down, a chicken hawk. It ran off as the hawk took poor Schmebulock instead.

"Baaaa-baaaaaaak!" the chicken desperately called out to the hero sacrificing himself maybe as all the other farm animals cried.

The chicken hawk carried Shmebulock all the way to its nest, filled with bones of its past meals. It shrieked at Shmebulock, ready to take his life.

Schmebulock narrowly dodged its sharp beak by stumbling off the nest and landing in a soft birthday cake on a picnic basket.

"Wha?!" the birthday girl started crying as everyone at the party looked at Shmebulock getting out of the cake. "Schmebulock." He sniffed the cake, but turned it away in disgust.

"There goes my birthday cake!" the girl started crying as the parents marched right up to the short man.

"You ruined our girl's party!" They picked him up and kicked him far away like a football player. "Well this turned out bad."

Shortly after, another adult came running in. "DON'T EAT THE CAKE!" He called out. "There's a recall about them due to a toxic chemical!"

Everyone's jaw's dropped. "That man …. He was an angel!" the mother gasped.

"And we kicked him away for it!" Everyone started panicking.

"He's our hero! We have to find him!" shouted the mother.

"Or else the big guy will punish us by having that wall guy be the next president!"

As everyone looked around, Schmebulock poked his head out of a pile of leaves and walked away.

"Schmebulock."

He climbed onto another bus which took him to an arena in California where some gaming competition was taking place.

"Schmebulock." Schmebulock signed himself up and entered the competition. Throughout the gaming tournament he was doing surprisingly well and managed to reach the final kid.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, and ladies disguised as gentlemen so they don't have to deal with the not so gentlemen." The announcer spoke. "We are now down to our two contestants. Schmebulock and McOttastyla!"

Schmebulock looked over at the boy in a black jacket and a weird glove-device in his hand. "The Energy Glove, it's so bad."

"Schmebulock."

A curtain opened up to reveal the next game. "In the first time in history, we are revealing a brand new sequel! The one that everyone has been waiting for an eternity. Half-Life 3!"

"H-Half-Life 3?!" Half-Life 3! THREEEEEEE!" everyone in the audience went crazy.

"Unfortunately this will be the only time this game will be revealed. After they beat the first boss, the entire game is going to be deleted forever."

A strong silence filled the atmosphere of that stadium.

.

.

.

"Shmebulock." Shmebulock stumbled away from the now burned down stadium.

"Yeah, they did overreact." McOttaStyla said, walking with the gnome. "And what's Half-Life?"

The Gnome and boy walked over to a mini-mall where someone was painting a picture, of a bagel. "I … I'd dead." The artist dropped to the ground miserably.

"What's up with you?" McOttaStyla asked the poor man.

"I don't know what to paint!" His eyes started leaking. "I can't find a good model anywhere in this entire … oh my."

"Schmebulock."

The artist crawled toward the gnome. "He's perfect!"

A montage of Schmebulock played out, showing the Gnome becoming a model and appearing in multiple magazines, commercials, and plans for some 70's style cartoon.

"Schmebulock." Schmebulock was now in a park for a typical public appearance.

"Sign my baby!" A young woman shouted as Schmebulock wrote his name on a watermelon.

"Schmebulock." He wrote his name on the baby's forehead and the woman fainted.

Everyone appeared to be having a blast, but not one person. Behind the crowd, an evil looking man was rubbing his hands together. "So, they think he's attractive and yet I'm not!" The obvious failed model said with a cartoonish villain voice. "Well he cannot overcome the powers of Dr. Doctor! He'll fall before me and I'll rule the world! BWA HA HA HA!" Then several tranquilizer darts were shot on his back and he fell to the ground.

"How does this guy keep escaping?" Two strong men in white hospital coats came over with tranquilizer guns in hand. They carried the man away, passing two familiar children.

"Awww, I was hoping for something climatic-y." Mabel Pines said as Dipper got a closer look at the 'model'. "Wait, is that a Gnome?"

Mabel looked ahead and saw Schmebulock. "Yeah, I remember him! He's the schmebie gnome." She shivered from the past experience with her supposed date with them. "Even though he's gross, we got to save him."

"Save him?" Dipper asked. "From what?"

"Being a model." Mabel pointed out. "He'll starve to death."

Dipper sighed and went along with it. "Well how are we supposed to save him? He's guarded by all those minions." Dipper gestured to the fans.

"Leave it to Mabel." Mabel jolted away in a short minute and brought in Waddles and Snake Eyes. "Look here, an adorable pig and an adorable kitty cat playing together!"

No one paid her any attention.

"Which will be recorded and uploaded online!"

Suddenly everyone swarmed around Mabel, asking when the video will be uploaded.

"Hey, what about this guy?" the artist asked the crowd about Schmebulock, but didn't receive an answer. "Does this mean I'm ruined?" asked the artist.

"I guess." A random producer said. "That how trends roll."

The artist got on his knees and cried out to the heavens. "What did I do to deserve this … riiiiiight."

(Flashback)

The artist was talking with a few people. "Building a wall and being hateful will help you succeed." "Cows should be turned to glue or steak when they are still young and can still produce milk." "That preservative will do fine with cakes." "Naaaaaw, no one will want a third game." "And remember; to escape from jail or an asylum, pull a Bugs Bunny and spin around to make a hole."

(End Flashback)

"Wait, when and why did that happened?" the artist held his head. "Seriously, how?!"

"Schmebulock." The gnome didn't seem phased that his popularity plummeted and walked towards the Pines twins.

"Well, time for your quest to end." Mabel said as she brought in a box.

(Some time later)

"Maaaaail."

Jeff the Gnome answered the door and brought in a box. "Oh boy!" He rubbed his hands and opened the box, revealing Schmebulock.

"Schmebulock."

"Schmebulock!?" Jeff gasped. "You've been gone for days …. And _you_ came back instead of the last issue of 'The Last Oxygenbender: Fogs and Shades'?!" Jeff angrily kicked his fellow Gnome out of his small house.

"Schmebulock."

 **End of Chapter**

 **Pzejbyrilzh**


	18. Break Rules a Little and Live

**Chapter 18:** Break Rules a Little and Live

"Bon Voyage, Mr. Pines and Mr. Author. Bon Voyage."

"Soos, you do realized they've left three hours ago?" Melody informed her boyfriend/boss, now dressed in the official Mystery Shack uniform like Soos used to wear.

"I know. I just miss them already." Soos started tearing up.

"I miss them already, too." Melody comforts her boyfriend. "Come, I'll make us some hot chocolate."

"Ooh, did you ever try hot chocolate with gummy koala and honey?"

That statement froze Melody. "Soos …. You are a visionary!"

Soos and Melody walked into the shack to see Wendy checking herself out in the mirror.

"How you like the uniform, Miss Handy Gal?"

Wendy turned to the couple. She was dressed in an official Question Mark T-shirt and wore a pair of old work jeans. She tugged Dipper's cap and gave the thumbs up. "Great and Dad approved." She looked over at a broken air conditioner. "And you're positive I'm right for the job? I mean I know I'll understand this better than Algebra, but that's really stretching it."

"You'll be a natural at it." Soos informed his now employee. "Even if you stink at it, I can still be Mr. Mystery and the Handyman while you'll be jobless. Wait. That came out wrong."

"Relax; we'll handle it when we reach the road." Wendy walked over to the candy machine to grab a snack. "Now what snack do I want….." Before putting her money in, she recalled what lie behind this machine for many years. The secret passageway to Stanford Pines' lab, the lab she'd never gotten to see. With a curious look, she glanced at her new employer. "Hey Soos, when was the last time you were down there?"

Melody looked at Soos who was scratching his head. "Not since after that portal thingy. Remember when I told you everything?"

"Yes. I do remember." Wendy said with a stern voice, recalling the long phone call that had stolen her precious sleep time. "So anyway, think we should check it out?"

"I don't know, Wendy. Ford said that only he, Mr. Pines, and Dipper are aloud down there."

"Is it really that bad?" Melody asked. "I'm sure all those dangerous experiments must be locked up."

"That does sound true." Soos said. "Ford is a smart enough mystery dude to keep all that dangerous stuff in a strong safe and not in cheap plastic containers. Buuuuuuut I still don't want to go against his demands."

"Well he let Dipper down there." Melody added. "If it's safe for a thirteen year old, it would be way safer for us."

"I wouldn't downplay Dipper like that, but that does sound good to me." Wendy said. "Come on, Soos. Do it, do it!"

Soos glanced at Melody and Wendy over and over as sweat ran down his face. "I uh … uhhhh… right dog. I don't know the password. So I guess we can't go down. What a shame."

"Done." Wendy said as the passageway opened up. She leaned on the wall and smirked. "How, you ask?" She pointed her thumbs to herself. "Because I'm a Flippin Corduroy."

"Woah woah, I still dunno." Soos was finding it harder and harder to say no.

"Soos, you've been down there before." Melody said. "Do you remember anything dangerous, besides that portal that's gone now?"

"… You're right. There's nothing that dangerous down there. Well except for that burn-hazard symbol on the machine that gave Mr. Pines that burn mark."

Wendy came up with one more point to win Soos over. "And you're the owner of the Mystery Shack now." Wendy pointed to Soos. "And this machine is in the shack, so that means you own the machine too, which also means own the passage way. And you don't want to let a perfectly good passage way go to waste."

"Wow, never thought of that."

"Like one of my favorite people used to say." Wendy spoke with a big smirk as she turned her hat backwards. "Break Rules a Little and Live!"

"Heh, I see what you did there." Soos made his decision. "Alright, let's go exploring. But no touching. Also don't tell Abuelita on me."

Melody nodded as Wendy gave the zip lip gesture.

"Well, here we go." Soos locked the Mystery Shack up and the three entered the passage way. When they got on the elevator, Soos noticed the second floor is now accessible. "You know, we haven't checked the second floor before. Let's do that on the way up."

They landed on the third floor and the three explored a bit. "Woah, this does look like that bunker." Wendy glanced around the glass case and noticed the Infinity Sided Dice, a Cyclops Squid, and other strange objects.

"And this is where that portal machine was." Soos directed their attention to the window showing the large empty room with what remains of the portal stacked up from the final fight with Bill Cipher. "You wouldn't believe how tense it got here before Ford showed up. We thought that Mr. Pines was some kind of evil master mind."

Wendy grunted. "I just had to go directly home after seeing the place being raided. That would have been awesome, and I could have had more sleep." She glared at Soos.

"More sleep? What kept you up?"

Wendy gave herself a face palm as Soos pointed at the symbol. "This is that strange symbol I told you guys about."

Melody and Wendy checked it out, it wasn't turned on, but Wendy could recognize it is as Stan's supposed tattoo. "So what does this mean anyway, Mr. Mystery?"

Soos instantly went into his 'Mr. Mystery Instincts'. "Why that is a mystery even I do not know." Soos waved his fingers. "Some say it represents the vengeful spirits that haunts this underground base, other says it came from above the stars, or it could be from Dipper's waaaaay too nerdy board game."

"Is it as nerdy as your cardboard, fantasy, make believe game?" Wendy smirked, but Melody started getting hyper.

"Soos, does she mean FCLORP?"

Soos's eyes widened with joy. "Do you play FCLORP?"

Suddenly Melody was now dressed in a cardboard princess outfit. "Save me from the dragon? Pardon me, but I will stand and fight beside you instead!" She held out a cardboard sword and smiled.

"I know what we're going to do after this!" They both started tiptoeing with joy as Wendy smiled at their childish romance.

"I wonder if I'll act that dorky when I actually find my 'dream guy' or whatever those sitcoms call them." Wendy sighed quietly as she turned her attention away. "So is this all that's down here?" Wendy glanced around some more to only find some secret security cameras and that the totem Pole was a Periscope. "Wow, I could have gotten caught big time. I hope this doesn't record."

Soos looked around the room. "Hm, well Ford's only been here a short time after being in another dimension. Maybe we can find something cool on the second floor."

The three entered the elevator and went directly to the second floor; a dark study filled with plenty of artifacts, dusty furniture, and a few inventions scattered around.

"Wow, this would make a great man cave." Soos said as he spun a globe and continued the activity non-stop. "I can do this all day."

Wendy looked around the desk, skimming some old notes until she noticed a huge pile of broken statues and torn up drapes. "What's this?" Wendy took one piece and noticed a familiar looking triangle. She glanced around the pile and realized that it was all related to the dream demon that terrorized Gravity Falls not so long ago. "On second thought, never mind." She dropped the piece and noticed Melody checking out a large computer.

"Hey, Soos. Want to amaze me on what this is?"

Soos jumped in and spoke. "This is the Genie-Machine!" Soos picked up a helmet that was connected to the machine. "You place this thing on your head and whatever you wish, it comes true." Soos demonstrated as he gentle remove the Fez and laid it on a table like a fragile piece of glasswork. "Now show me the bacon!" Soos turned the machine on and the screen showed some steamy bacon. "See, it works!"

Melody noticed a note on the machine and translated the science talk into English. "Looks like this computer can read minds."

"Awesome!" Wendy said. "Wait, read my mind how?"

"You just have to wear that helmet and it will tell your thoughts." Melody said as a list of Soos's thoughts played out.

' _We shouldn't be doing this.'_

' _I want some bacon now.'_

' _Melody is like the coolest.'_

' _What should I make Abuelita for dinner?'_

' _I hope I don't let Mr. Pines Down.'_

' _I want Mr. Pines to adopt me.'_

' _There's something not right with that mailman.'_

' _Who would win in a fight? SuperBat or Manman?'_

' _I'M MR. MYSTERY NOW! ALL MY DREAMS HAVE COME TRUE!'_

"Woah, that's awesome!" Soos spoke like a child. "What else can it do?"

Melody read the note about fixing it after an accident and something else. "Says here that Stanford wants to duplicate an invention a friend he met in another dimension made. Also a reminder to zap a bending robot for stealing his wallet. Hm, that sounds fun."

"Whatever it is, I want it now." Wendy said in a stern voice. "So anyway, Gimme a shot at that."

Soos removed the helmet and gave it to Wendy. Just like Soos, Wendy gently placed Dipper's hat on a table and put the helmet on.

' _School is super dull.'_

' _What wouldn't Thompson eat?'_

' _Just got the high score! Beat that Tambry!'_

' _What would Dad say at a time like this? Probably 'I want to marry my bed'."_

' _I so want to ride a tank!'_

' _I'm the coolest.'_

' _The next person that spreads a rumor about me won't be walking for a year!'_

' _I just cleaned that you guys! Go play with Dad or something!'_

' _Dad, you broke the fridge again! And the ceiling! And the floor! And my bedroom door?!'_

' _If I was a guy, I'll be bald by now. Wait, can girls get bald?'_

' _Oh you think I'm just one of those dime-a-dozen pretty faces? You're not gonna like the next thirty seconds.'_

' _Another F?!'_

' _Soon I'm going to drive a car!... With road laws …. Darn it!'_

' _Every single guy I date, he always does this. Every. Single. Guy!'_

' _Dipper and Mabel are home now. Ugh!'_

' _Nate, Lee. You had like three golden opportunities to rip on this stupid movie.'_

' _No more random crazy drawings from Mabel anymore.'_

' _I need to get Dipper to be my online tutor or something.'_

' _Here's hoping Mabel doesn't get her heart broken by some random guy.'_

' _Dipper does deserve a cool girlfriend his age.'_

' _Mabel's just like the sister I always wanted.'_

' _You mean a lot to me, Dipper.'_

' _I hate it that I missed most of those mystery hunts.'_

' _The author showed up when I wasn't there?!'_

' _Things just got super boring already?'_

' _Wonder what the dorks are up to?'_

' _I wish I could punch that gum brat.'_

' _Really, how can someone not give him a valentine?'_

' _Dipper. Mabel.'_

' _Dipper. Mabel.'_

' _Dipper. Mabel.'_

' _Dipper. Mabel.'_

' _Dipper. Mabel.'_

' _RRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWRRRRRRRRHHHHHHHH!'_

"…Woah, that was building up." Wendy sighed after hearing all those thoughts. "Sorry you had to hear all that." Wendy felt sort of embarrassed, but the two looked compassionate.

"Don't stress out too much, Wendy." Soos informed her. "You gotta remember all those stuff that make you cool. Like your lumberjack-karate hybrid fighting moves."

Melody placed a hand on Wendy's shoulder. "And if you need someone to listen to you, I'm all ears. Well I just have two."

"Thanks guys." Wendy softly smiled at them. "Haven't heard anyone talk to me like that since Dipper and …. Scratch that last part."

"And we'll always be here." Soos said. "Come on; let's see what else got here." Soos looked around as Melody joined him.

"You guys are lucky that you got to hang out with Dipper and Mabel this summer. They sound amazing."

"Yeah …." Wendy thought back on the summer she had with them as short clips played on the screen. "They sure are."

Then the machine showed two more lines of thoughts.

' _Mabel, if any guy breaks your heart. Just tell me and I'll beat the living snot out of them while you hold the camera.'_

' _If Dipper was a bit older-'_

Wendy's thoughts immediately stopped as her face turned dark red.

"What was that last part?" Soos asked as he and Melody were being too distracted by a snow globe with a singing snowman in it.

"Oh, it uhhh." Wendy felt the heat coming off her face as the screen was being bombarded with ' _Don't Look!' 'I'm I blushing?' 'Think of something, girl!'_

"H-Hey look, a spiral staircase!" Wendy pointed to the set of stairs leading who knows where.

Both Soos and Melody turned away from the snow globe and looked at the stairs with large google eyes. "Spiral staircases are my favorite." They both said as they climbed right up.

"Phew. Close one." Wendy sighed in relief and said to the machine. "You're just a wise guy, aren't you?" Wendy joked around with the machine as her own thoughts appeared to be answering her.

' _Not as wise as you.'_

"Thank you for pointing out the obvious." Wendy leaned back as she listened in on the commotion Soos and Melody were making over another small object. "Just like what she used to always say." Wendy leaned back and breathed easily. "'Break Rules a Little and Live!'."

' _Why did you have to die, Mom?'_

Pure shock ran down her body as she took the helmet right off and threw it to the ground in a panic. She held onto her beating chest as she slowly catches her breath.

"Wendy, is everything alright down there?" Melody asked from above.

Wendy took deep breath and picked up Dipper's hat. "Yeah, just following some good advice."

"O.K., you should check this out. Soos found some talking toys."

"Cowboy, Space Dude, and all you copyrighted toys; you are all gonna have a blast when Melody and I combine our imagination!"

"Hooray!"

Wendy started climbing up the stairs as she gave the machine one last look. She took another deep breath and hid her face away from the old computer that can read the thoughts of others, even the deepest, strongest, and unwanted memories hidden deep within.

 **End of Chapter**

 **Pqobpp colj ebo cxjfiv fp ebxiba tfqe ilsb, yrq qeb ploolt peb cbbip colj qeb ilpq lkb pqfii ifsbp fk ebo ebxoq.**


	19. Toy Story Negative One

**Chapter 19:** Toy Story Negative One

"Melody." Soos spoke to his girlfriend who was right next to him. "I think Ford had a very good reason to have that picture of a skull on that toy chest."

As it turned out, Soos and Melody were both tied together on the living room floor as all the living toys they've found in Ford's secret study were dancing around in victory.

"Sheriff Steely, we've successfully captured the enemy." A small army man said to an unseen toy.

From the shadows, a cowboy ventriloquist dummy walked out with a sinister grin. "Yeah, I see that, you easily losable piece of plastic!" he shouted like a self-centered rich guy who's gotten the wrong colored car.

"Dude; that was not called for." Soos told the dummy.

"Sorry, I don't speak to piles of clay." Sheriff Steely snarled as he kicked Soos's belly.

"You have no right to talk to him like that!" Melody shouted, which just made Steely smiled.

"Oh look, the wo-man is defending the child-man."

"Hey!" shouted a Little Bo Peep doll.

"You stay out of this!" he shouted yet again.

A small spaceman toy walked up to Steely. "Sheriff Steely, why do we have to tie them up? They're the only ones who'd played with us in thirty years."

"Hey, you sound just like Tim Allen." Soos pointed out.

"Oh what an original joke. Bravo." Steely sarcastically clapped. "Astronaut Fishbowl, do you not see what's going on here?"

Fishbowl looked at the two adults. "Well we were playing with them until you've struck them with a bat. And now you tied them up."

"Thank you for living in the past." Steely walked to a 90's microphone toy and spoke to his toy minions. "For years toys have been mistreated and thrown away like we're inanimate objects!"

"Well that's one of our rules?" a toy t-rex said. "Why is that?"

"AHEM!" Steely said. "But not today! We are going to set out of this old house and seek vengeance on all the children in the world!"

Melody and Soos gasped. "That's horrible!"

"What do you know, more people pointing out the obvious." Steely placed his hands on his hips. "You're lucky we're letting you people live so you can actually become adults like your unattractive bodies make you look!"

"Hey, Melody likes me like this. And I like her for her mind in that head." Soos said.

"And have tired being an adult?" Melody glared at the cowboy. "You wouldn't even last ten seconds."

"Or really?" Steely raised an eyebrow. "Try spending thirty years in the dark with these losers!" Steely gestured to his toys henchmen.

"Wait, aren't some of those toys younger than thirty years?" Soos asked.

"… Shut up!" Steely kicked the toy microphone away. "Men, and not men. We're invading a daycare center!"

"But Sheriff." Fishbowl said. "Do we know where to find one?"

"Do we know where to find one?" Steely repeated like a child. "That's why we're going to 'walk' around this sad town until we find one. Now GO!"

Soos struggled as the toys marched out of the door. "I won't let you get away with this, you dirt eating, cow hating …. Melody, know any good cowboy comebacks?"

Steely laughed. "Maybe you should ask a real life cowboy in Texas the next time you cross the border illegally."

Soos's jaw dropped. "You ….. you said …" He started tearing as Melody viciously squirmed.

"Oh boo hoo, I hurt your wibble feelings." Steely laughed as he marched right out of the house. "Boy I love being the self-elected Sheriff."

The toys jumped onto a golf-cart and drove off into town.

As all the toys tried their hardest to drive the car, Steely was lounging in the back as two Barbies fanned him. "Now don't take too long finding a daycare center. I hate it when I have to wait too long. And don't blow our cover that we're living toys!"

The toys made a rampage throughout the town, causing accidents, property damage, and all sort of pain. And every single person witnessed this and realized that they are living toys.

"Toys are alive!?" "It's the end of the world, again!" "That's a collector item!"

Steely sat up and noticed all the people pointing. "Great job! Great job!"

Up ahead, Sheriff Blubs and Deputy Durland were just minding their own business outside the coffee shop.

"One lump or two?" asked Durland.

"Are you talking about sugar lumps, or my heart?" Blubs said with compassion.

Then the toy filled golf cart drove right pass them, causing Durland to spit out his coffee. "Sweet Secret Life of Toys! Did you see that, Blubs!?"

Blubs stood right up and adjusted his sunglasses. "I sure did, Durland …. There's another sheriff in town! And there's only room for one! Unless if that second sheriff is you, Durland."

"Awww, so what should we do about them?"

Then Mayor Tyler came into the scene. "Get 'em. Get 'em!"

The two cops nodded heads and jumped into their police car and drove after them. "We he he he!"

.

.

.

Meanwhile back at the shack, Abuelita walked into the house with groceries in her hands. "Soos, I'm back from the market and oh my." Abuelita looked at the two tied up adults. "I rescue you know." She took out a pair of branch cutters and cut the ropes up. "Now who did this to you, Soos?"

"It was a bunch of living toys and their leader, a cowboy who's mean." Soos said. "They even made a horrible joke." Soos started tearing as Melody comfort him.

"Soos, what kind of joke was it to make you feel like this?" Melody whispered into Abuelita's ears. What she heard shocked her, which was overshadowed by pure anger. "Me llego la motosierra!"

.

.

.

"What took you long enough?!" Steely pushed the Barbie girls away and hopped off the cart. "Really, you call this a daycare?" Steely said as he looked upon the gloomy looking building with bared windows and a huge wall around it.

"Looks like one to us." The toys said. "It's very well protected and-"

"This is a prison!" Steely shouted. "It's just like our toy chest, only less annoying!" He kicked a few army men away. "Now get back in the cart and drive me to an actual daycare so we can destroy some stupid brats!"

"Oh is that your plan, huh?" The toys turned around to see Sheriff Blubs and Deputy Durland. "We're placing you under arrest for violating law A113: Having a number of sheriffs over the limit. Also threat of child abuse and for holding off this moment." Blubs then handed Durland a present. "Happy Birthday, Durland!"

Durand's pupils grew and let out a great awe. "You remembered!"

Steely looked at the two and realized what's going on. "Oh I see what this is. I've been waiting to make these kinds of jokes." Steely took out a list from under his plastic hat. "What's the matter? Parents disowned you?"

Durland gasped. "How-How did you know?!"

Steely laughed and turned to Blubs. "Those high heels make you look fat!"

"I-I'm not fat." Blubs said in a hurt voice.

"Awww, not man enough? Why not go whine to the government like the miserable pansies that you are to get them to legalize your overrated, qu-" Then a hand grabbed ahold of Steely's head and lifted him up. "Hey, what's the big idea!?" The hand turned the cowboy to face its owner, Abuelita.

"Hello, mister cowboy. I need to have a word with you where no one can see us."

As she took him away, Steely started his usual rant. "What, you want some lemon pledge? Sorry, the motel, I mean retirement home is that way. I'm sure your kids will love to dump you there and … hey, what are you- AAAAAH AAAAAH AAH AAAH! MY LEG! MY HEAD DOESN'T TURN LIKE THAT! OH, NO! NOT THE TERMITES! NOT THE TERMITES! AAAAAHHHHH! OH, THEY'RE IN MY EYES! MY EYES! AAAAHHHHH! AAAAAGGHHH!"

"I know he's a jerk and all, but that seems… eh. I got nothin." Soos said as he and Melody entered the scene.

"Did that awful cowboy say anything bad to you guys?" Melody asked the hurt cops.

"He guessed right about my own folks." Durland cried into Blubs's arms. "All I ever did was ….. was change my political views!"

"Durland, I had no idea." Blubs patted him on the back. "Durland, I am making this the best birthday you ever had."

"Dawww, you don't have to get in the trouble of doing that."

"Trouble? It will be a delight." The two cops embraced each other in a tight hug. "Now let's go watch the fireworks." Blubs pointed to an open bonfire that Abuelita started.

"That takes care of that." Abuelita patted her hands. "Hope no one ever tries to push something like to be made ever again." She turned her attention to the shocked toys. "Now what about all of you?"

They looked at the toys who were watching the fire. "Eeeeh, I wasn't fond of that guy anyway." A piggy bank said.

"I secretly wanted to throw him out the window, but that was better?" A Slinky Dog said. "But now we need a new leader."

The Army Men saluted to Fishbowl. "Astronaut Fishbowl, we feel that you have the right heart to guide us."

"Really?" Fishbowl looked at all the toys cheering. "O.K. I'll do my best!" He pointed to prison. "I know kids are destructive, but I bet a lot of inmates just need some love and creative play time. Let's cheer them all up."

The toys cheered and marched right into prison.

"Wow, what a day." Melody said. "I'd rather fight those robots and videogame girl again than listen to him for more than ten seconds."

"But now he's with my deceased husband." Abuelita said. "Now let's go home. I'm making dinosaur shaped cookies."

"Soos." Melody said. "You have the best grandma in the world."

"Tell me something I don't know."

"Oh you two are making me blush." Abuelita said.

So they all drove in Soos's pickup truck back to the shack. But out of the flames came the burned cowboy, still alive. "You unattractive people will be punished for this. I am the favorite toy! Vengeance shall be mi-" Then the cops poke him back in the fire with a stick.

"You're only going to be a onetime thing, deal with it!" Blubs shouted. "Durland, you got the marshmallows?"

"Marshmallows, chocolate, and graham crackers!" They both enjoyed their s'mores until Durland spoke. "Today wasn't too dark, was it?"

"Naw." Blubs said. "Even though he said some harsh things, it's not nearly as bad as Weirdmageddon."

"Right, that triangle guy was the worst."

"Woops, we mentioned it." Both cops took out their tasers and shocked themselves with the pure joy of following the law.

 **End of Chapter**

 **Efp mrkfpejbkq pexii yb ql txqze Aobxjtlohp ybzljfkd jlob mlmrixo.**

Yeah I'm sure a lot of you are having mixed thoughts on this. The main reason for a non-important chapter like this is so that I can have the next chapter be on something like 20, which it is important, but what could the reason be?

Spoiler alert. It's not Bill related.


	20. Stolen Treasure

**Chapter 20:** Stolen Treasure

"Finally, another weekend." Mabel moped on a park bench next to her brother. "When are Beethoven and Dyami coming? We're burning hot weather." She leaned on Dipper's head and pointed at a tree. "They're gonna change any minute now …. Any minute now ….. any minute."

"Mabel, we've only been here for ten seconds." Dipper reminded her as he checked the journal. "And it's Saturday, we have all day to find what else is in here."

"Didn't Lightning tell us not to go snooping around here?" Mabel asked as she rested her entire body on the boy's head.

"Mabel you do realize that didn't stop us before." Mabel got off as Dipper took out a map of the park. "This park is huge, and has an access to the forest." Dipper pointed to the wooden area at the edge of the park. "I suspect that the majority of the paranormal is located in these woods, judging by how Gravity Falls is."

"Hm, that sounds like something a stupid movie sequel will say." Mabel took the map off her brother. "I say we start at the lake and rent a boat, and by 'we' I mean just me and Dyami. You and Beethoven can do something else."

Then their two friends came by. Beethoven was equipped with a baseball bat and a football helmet while Dyami had a net, a camera, and a backpack filled win other useful equipment.

"So Dipper, what's the plan?" Dyami asked.

Dipper pointed to the forest on the map. "We'll be exploring the forest for any traces of the paranormal. But we shouldn't go too deep."

"There's a path there too." Mabel added. "Dipper and Beethoven can go exploring in the woods while Dyami and I check out the pathway, just the two of us."

Dipper pulled out a different book with the Pine Tree symbol and jolted down some notes. "September something. Our team is about to explore the forest of this park."

"Get away from me you creep!"

"So far we'd just heard a girl shouting 'Get away from me you creep'. This could mean that-" Dipper stopped himself and shot right up. "Someone's crying for help!"

The four kids looked around and Beethoven pointed near the edge of the forest. "Over there!" They ran ahead to see an unfamiliar looking girl and an aggressive porcupine.

"Just stay back if you know what's good for you!" the skinny girl was the same age as the kids, but was taller than them by a quarter of their height. She had brown hair reaching to her shoulders, pale skin, and yellow eyes. She wears a gray bobble cap with a white bobble and white lines around the bottom, a green long-sleeved shirt, black sweatpants, and light blue boots.

She reached for a stick and tried swatting the porcupine away, making it more aggressive.

"I got this!" Dyami jumped into the scene and took the porcupine's attention. "Easy there, want a snack." He got down to eye level and offered the animal some trail mix. The porcupine cautiously approached the boy and sniffed the food. Feeling no threat, it started nibbling on the trail mix.

This action nearly caused Mabel to faint. "That was amazing." Mabel sighed, making Beethoven jealous.

The girl carefully moved around the animal and towards the kids. "Thanks for saving my butt out there." She dug through her back pocket and there in her hands was some jam. "I just had to put a packet of grape jam in my favorite pants. This is the third stained pants this month." She groaned to herself. "My parents are gonna kill me." She looked at her bottom, but suddenly turned to Dipper and gave him a strong punch to his shoulder that knocked him down and his lumberjack hat right off his head. "That's just in case you got some _ideas_ from me mentioning that." She turned over to Beethoven, who protested against her suspicion, which lead to some more awkwardness from him.

"What are you talking about?" Dipper asked as he felt his shoulder "But that was an awesome punch!"

The girl looked down at Dipper. "Really? You're like, thirteen right?"

"For about two weeks."

"Ooooooh." The girl sheepishly smiled. "You'll … you'll understand. Just don't think about it."

"Are you sure?"

"She is positive, Dipper." Mabel informed her brother. "Trust me on this and do not question it whatsoever Mr. Sweaty and Awkward!"

The girl offered Dipper a hand. "Well sorry, dude."

Dipper looked up into her yellows eyes and felt a sudden heat inside of him. Something old and yet, entirely knew.

"Weeee, weee!" The porcupine walked close to the kids and sniffed the hat.

"Why didn't anyone tell me porcupines make the cutest noises?" Mabel asked with joy.

"Ten minutes ago, I mean yesterday, I mean me!" Beethoven said.

The porcupine quickly glanced at Dipper which caught his attention. "Hey?" The porcupine stood there silently, right until it took the lumberjack hat.

"No no no wait!" Dipper reached for the hat, but the porcupine dashed right into the forest. "No, GIVE THAT BACK!" His blood pulsed with rage and the boy ran after the porcupine.

"Dipper, wait for me!" Mabel chased after Dipper.

"Be careful, porcupine's spines can cause infections!" Dyami ran up ahead.

"If that stupid rodent hurt Mabel, I'll turn it into a spike boxing glove!" Beethoven rushed in with possible vengeance on his mind.

The girl just looked at the kids chasing after the animal that was giving her a hard time. "Wow, that was some brute anger there." She lost sight of the kids and rubbed her chin. "That boy got guts."

.

.

.

Dipper Pines ran deeper into the woods to try catching the hat theft. "You stupid pin cushion! Give me back her hat!" Thanks for Dipper's experience back in Gravity Falls, he narrowly dodged all stones, roots, and other obstacles of the forest as he kept his thoughts focused on the porcupine.

"Dipper!" Dyami caught up to the boy with ease. "If you lose sight of him, I'll get you a new one." Dyami then saw the sudden glare in Dipper's eyes. "Say no more, I know what you mean."

Suddenly the porcupine made a quick turn through some shrubs. Dipper was about to jump in, but Dyami stopped him. "That's poison oak!" Dyami pulled Dipper back and ran behind the shrubs. "I'll lure him out; you use a stick to take your hat back." Dyami took out the trail mix again. "Come here, I know you like the yogurt covered raisins." Dyami laid some trail mix on the ground and the two kids waited patiently for the animal to come out.

"Get out of there, you ungrateful rat." Dipper whispered to himself as he pat the stick in his hand.

"Come here, don't be shy." Dyami said gently.

They waited for a few minutes until they heard the porcupine's call, coming from several feet next to them.

"Wha?" Both boys looked to see the porcupine was out of the shrub and looking at them, as if it was taunting.

"Is that the same-"

The porcupine held onto Wendy's hat, confirming it is in fact the same one.

"How did it-" Dipper ignore his assumption and ran after it, but suddenly the porcupine dropped the hat and hissed at Dipper.

Dipper quickly calmed down, trying to cautiously take the hat back. "Look, I won't hurt you. I can easily guarantee that if you give me, the hat back." Dipper held his urge to kick the living stuffing out of the rodent and allowed Dyami to lay some trail mix on the ground.

Dyami then stepped back and quietly moved behind the porcupine to reach of the hat.

"Just take it easy and-"

Suddenly the porcupine turned to Dyami. It made one loud hiss before surprising the living souls out of the kids by bursting into flames.

"WHAT THE-"

Dyami fell to the ground and the flames went out, allowing the porcupine to snatch the hat and run off again.

"Did it just-" Dyami caught himself and stood right up. "It just burst into flames like a torch!"

Dipper was completely astonished by what he just witnessed. "Was that … the guardian?" Dipper thought back to the flames that protected him and his friends from the fairies, and the leader of the fairies telling him that a guardian will protect them.

"But why does it want …. Wendy's hat!?" His anger returned and he chased after the animal.

"Wendy?" Dyami asked himself before chasing after Dipper.

.

.

.

"Dipper, Dyami! Where are you?" Mabel shouted in the forest. "Rover rhere." Mabel softly giggled. "I can't believe how much trouble Wendy's hat is getting us into."

Beethoven caught up with Mabel, out of breath. "W-Wendy?" Beethoven thought about hat and put two and two together. "I .. I think I saw a picture of a teenager in Dipper's locker on the … first day …. of school."

"That's her alright. Coolest person on the planet." Mabel said with joy. "Which is why my brother is head over heels for her."

"But isn't she like three years older than him?" Beethoven asked after catching his breath.

"Two and a half maybe; and she told him that she's too old and gently let him down like the coolest person ever." Mabel thought back on that day after the bunker incident. "Before that, Dipper's been trying to win her over, but now he treasures their 'friend-zone' bond." Mabel shook her head. "He'd tried flirting with other girls before, but he took my Grunkle's advice. Ugh." Mabel took out a notepad and wrote down a quick note. "Next Summer Match Making, Grunkle Stan. And make sure it's a keeper."

Beethoven noticed a large bug flying around him. "Hey, beat it." He swat it and laughed, but bug stood right up and poke him in the eye. "OW!"

"Served you right." The bug laughed.

Mabel recognized the bug and smiled. "Hey, it's Lightning!"

The blue-skinned fairy turned to Mabel and smiled. "Glad to see you remembered me." She glared at Beethoven. "So let me guess, Paranormal hunting?"

"Yep!" Mabel said with no regret. "But right now my brother is trying to get a hat back from an adorable porcupine."

Lightning straighten up her wings from the sudden attack. "That sounds hilarious ….. did you just say porcupine?"

"Uh huh." Mabel nodded.

"Uh oh."

"Not a porcupine?"

"Bingo."

"Was his name'O!"

"Literally no times for jokes, kid!"

.

.

.

The boys reached a small clearing where the porcupine laid the hat down and walked back several feet. Dipper dove in and hugged the hat tight. "Gotcha!" He placed is on his hat as Dyami met up with him.

"What is he doing now?" Dyami asked as the porcupine just stood there.

After calming his anger, Dipper looked at the unusual porcupine. "I don't now, but it burst into flames before. It has to be the guardian that Lighting was talking about."

"And what saved us before." Dyami turned to Dipper. "Maybe he brought us here for a good reason."

Then a circle of arrows where shot around them.

"Or it just wants us dead."

The porcupine stood on its hind legs and blew on its finger. This caused the creature to puff up its body to make it look like a chubby troll with smooth grey skin and enlarged hands, nose, and ears.

"Rrrabra blah blah blah!"

Then countless others jumped from the trees and aimed their arrows at them.

"Dipper, what are these!?" Dyami asked.

Dipper quickly took the journal volume out and flipped through the pages. "Trolls, Goblins, Gremoblins? Uncle Ford didn't record these guys!"

"Blah blaaah blah!" the center one pointed at the kids and the snickered sinisterly.

Before any of them could shot; one fell forward.

"Blah blah." The one next to it said in a sarcastic way. The fallen one was then dragged into the unforeseen forest, followed by a horrific cry in pain and a second voice which sounded like a savaged animals.

Thinking quickly, the center creature ordered the others to shoot at the new enemy, but then a ball of flames jumped from the trees and landed in front of the leader.

"T-T-The guardian!" Dipper shouted as Dyami quickly took out his camera and started taking pictures.

The nearly 5' tall flare looked to be in a form of a quadrupedal animal guessing from the four engulfed 2' long legs seen on the bottom, but the rest was covered too much to show any other characteristics.

As the underlings ran off, the leader just curled up and used his quills for protection.

Dipper paid close attention and took out his own journal and jolted down how the flare walked around it and dabbed at it like a predator looking for a weak spot. It then jumped away and a mouth was able to be seen. It inhaled deeply and shot out a sunbeam-like laser that burned the creature to literal ashes which were blown away in the wind.

The flare took in deep breath from great exhaustion as it looked at the amazed kids, and slowly walked away as it catches its breath.

"That …. Was …. Amazing!" Both Dyami and Dipper jumped up and down.

"Did you get pictures?" Dipper asked.

"Yes, but out of common dumb luck they must be out of focus and look photo shopped." Dyami tried holding in his excitement. "Did you write stuff down?"

"I sure did!" Dipper showed him the notes. "But this is clear to read and not made up! I win!"

"Win what?"

"I don't know!"

The boys both laughed before Mabel, Beethoven, and Lightning entered the scene.

"Alright, Pukkie wudgies! Hand over my brother and the hunky Dyami before we beat you with our amazing strength!"

The three noticed that only the boys were present and surrounded by arrows.

"Did you save the day without me?" Mabel held her fist on her waists and frowned.

"Mabel, Beethoven!" Dyami leaped from over the arrows and showed the three his photos. "A holy orb of flame saved us!"

Dipper took out the arrows in front of him and examined the tip. "You don't wanna touch those." Lightning said. "Pukwudgie arrows are tipped with snake poison."

Dipper lowered the arrows back down. "Pukwudgies?"

"Troll guys that turn into porcupines and shoot fire." Lightning said. "They normally live far out into the wilderness, but normally travel here when summer is going away."

"Please don't use the words 'summer' and 'going away' in the same sentence." Mabel said as Beethoven gasped at the pictures of the flames which thankfully were clear.

Lightning looked at the pictures. "In case you're wondering, that will be the guardian."

"I knew it!" Dipper shouted like a fangirl, which caused Beethoven and Lightning to snicker. "You should have been there, it drag one into the forest and mauled it. Then it burst out like that and obliterated the leader! It was awesome and Grunkle Ford will be so proud that we discovered something here that he didn't in Gravity Falls!" Suddenly Dipper felt like he was going to faint from lack of oxygen.

"Take it easy there." Mabel patted him on the back. "Breath, breath."

As they traveled back to the forest, Dyami was examining each photo he took. "No actual body parts shown and the flames could have made whatever it was larger than it appears." He took notice of the legs. "But maybe we can learn more if a certain someone wants to tell us …. Where'd she go?"

The kids noticed that Lightning wasn't with them anymore.

"Looks like she's missing out on victory ice cream!" Mabel leaped out of the forest and reached the park. "Let's go before-" Mabel loudly gasped and ran to a tree. "The leaves are changing color!" she points a a single leaf with a lighter shade of green from the rest. "We have to get back before ….. are you petting Wendy's hat?"

They looked at Dipper treating the hat like a delicate infant, who then quickly noticed the awkward stares. "Uh, no. I was just ..checking for bite marks. Heh." He placed the hat back, but straightened it up properly.

Mabel sighed. "Believe me. I know what it's like to have a failed crush and having it eat me away." Mabel said which angered Beethoven who whispered something about boys letting the perfect catch go. "Trust me. You need to move on like what you did on the revenge trip. And by that I mean talk to girls and treat them like human beings." She got rear close to Dipper's face. "Candy Hurter!"

"The heck happened?" Dyami asked, wondering what kind of kid Dipper really is, and what Mabel meant by 'Candy Hurter'.

"Besides." Mabel playfully nudged her brother. "I saw that look in your eyes when that girl tried helping you up …. Where is she anyway?" Mabel gazed around the surround as Dipper quickly blushed.

"Mabel…" he groaned. Dipper then took off his hat again and examined the item that once sat on top the beautiful flaming hair of his crush. "I know that all too well." Dipper sighed and placed the hat back on. "But even if I get a new crush or possibly a girlfriend and finally get over Wendy, I'll never let anything happen to this hat. She's more than a crush to me, Mabel. She's one of my best friends, and yours too."

Mabel smiled as she looked at the hat and to Dipper. "I'm glad you understand. But next time if you lose your hat to something dangerous, you might as well leave it for safety." She placed a hand on his shoulder. "Wendy wouldn't want you getting hurt because of her hat, and I'm sure Wendy won't risk her life to get your old one back."

* * *

At a cliff side facing a dense wilderness; a lanky teenager, covered in bruises and a few cuts, pulled herself up and laid on the ground.

"Finally ….. got it …. back." Wendy Corduroy held up Dipper's hat and placed it back on her head. "Next time … I'm making some honey roasted crow."

Beside her stood Nate and Lee; looking concern for their lumberjack friend. "Wendy. You know you can get another one at the Mystery Shack, right? Soos is selling them at a fair price now."

Wendy then gave the two one long enraging glare which caused both of them to slowly walk back.

 **End of Chapter**

 **Qeb Drxoafxk molqbzqp qeb fkklzbkqp xka cfdeqp qeb tfzhba, xka vbq efabp jlob pbzobqp ybpfabp fq fabkqfqv.**

* * *

 **A/N:** O.K., this chapter wasn't that important like some people guessed, but there is always the first domino.

Also the next chapter will be one suggested by a follower. I will go over more details about requested chapters next time. So please do not ask me now.


	21. Wendy the Barbarian

**Updated on 5/23/15**

 **Thank you '** guest **'**

 **Chapter 21:** Wendy the Barbarian

 **This chapter was a suggested story by '** Cowardly Christian 'du911 **' You can thank this person that I am now looking for suggestions, more details will be given at the end.**

"Man, Wendy. I haven't seen anyone go after a bird like a crazed lunatic like that before." Robbie said as the cool gang walked through the forest of Gravity Falls.

In his arms, Tambry was texting on her phone. "I've already gotten great pics." She showed them Wendy climbing the cliff and wrestling the crow for Dipper's hat.

Wendy looked at her hat that she swapped with Dipper and shook off some feathers. "Thank Gosh that stupid bird didn't ruin it. But now it smells like dead rabbits …. Is that a tear!?"

Robbie chuckled at Wendy examining Dipper's hat in a frantic state. "If you love it so much, why don't you marry it?"

Seeing that the hat was fine, Wendy took a good moment to think. "You know, that's not such a bad idea." She faced the hat towards her and waved her finger at it. "Hat, do not be gloomy 24/7 ….. Hat, do not wear skinny jeans …. Hat, do not stand me out and ask me out again instead of apologizing…. Hat, do not rip off a love song online."

Nate and Lee laughed as Robbie frown. "Hey, I learned my lesson."

"You sure did, Robbie-kins." Tambry said which everyone faked a gross out, but then Thompson accidentally hurt his throat.

"Ack, water! Water!"

"Here, catch!" Lee tossed a water bottle, but Thompson missed and it rolled down a hill.

"I got it!" Thompson chased after it but bumped into something large. "Sorry, I was AAAAH!"

Thompson stood back as the thing turned around and revealed itself, a Manotaur. "What is this I see?" he sniffed the frighten teen. "You call yourself a man?"

"No, I call myself Thompson!"

The teen came in and gasped at the beast. "Thompson, run!" shouted Lee and Nate in a panic.

The Manotaur glared at the teens and noticed the red headed one. "You, I remember you."

Wendy looked at the creature with caution. "Yeah, weren't you at the Mystery Shack when Bill took over?"

Seeing a familiar comrade, the manotaur put on a joyful grin. "Yes, you are the woman that fought like a man. No offence, I will never punch the pride of someone who rode a flying eyeball like that!"

Wendy gave a prideful smirk as the teens rooted for her. "What can I say; I have Corduroy blood in me."

The manotaur also cheered, but stopped half way in shock. "Wait, did you say Corduroy?"

"That's right." Wendy smiled.

To her surprise, the manotaur started laughing greatly. "I should have guessed it before. you must be the child of Manly Dan!"

"You know my dad?" Wendy asked curiously.

"Who doesn't know that man, he and all his ancestor used to enter our 'Manly-ness Man Macho M-fights' every year."

"Fights?" Wendy tilted her head as the others paid close attention. "Ancestors? As in all my grandpaps?"

"Is it just like wrestling?" Robbie asked with a hint of excitement.

"Wrestling? You mean that widdle 'pretend fight' on the glowing box? HA! We fight for REAL!" the Manotaur flexed his muscles, which startled Thompson. "Throughout the ages, the Manotaurs and the Corduroys used to nuke it out in our 'Manly-ness Man Macho M-fights' and many have won and lost!"

(A flashback showed off many lumberjacks and Manotaurs wrestling each other and hey hey, is that the lumberjack ghost from that Northwest Party?! Dude, spoilers. That will only work on T.V.!)

"Us Manotaurs, Corduroys, and any puny creature brave enough have entered our manly tournaments. The fights were long and hard, but no matter what, we and your family have won many fights!" the Manotaur pounded his chest. "I am Chutzpar, leading champion since …. This many years!" He held us three fingers. "All Manotaurs know about your heroic actions, so you are more than welcome!" He handed her a flier. "We fight at sundown!"

The teens gathered around Wendy and saw the flier depicting a Manotaurs fighting each other and a few Gnomes gnawing on their knees.

"Woah, this is sweet!" Nate said as he and Lee took the flier.

"Wendy, there's no way these guys can take you. You have to enter!"

The teens looked at Wendy, who seemed completely lost. "Time out, guys. I have some questions." She turned to Chutzpar. "You're saying that my entire family used to go to these?"

"That's right." Chutzpar answered. "Why are you confused, woman?"

"Because this is the first time I'm hearing this." Wendy said. "I swear if this is a gender thing…."

"No, that's not it at all." Chutzpar answered. "The Corduroys always wait until their children are 16 of age."

Wendy felt relief a bit, but did make a small uncomfortable face. "Yeah … so should I just wait or ….."

"The prize is a huge diamond we found." Chutzpar replied. "It's not a dog, so you would like it."

The teen suddenly jumped back as Wendy's eyes opened wide. "Did you just describe me as a girly stereotype?"

Even Chutzpar felt the horrid aura coming from the lumberjack girl. "No, that's not it. You can … sell if for your … trash you call it?"

"Cash?" Suddenly Wendy had an idea. (Diamond + sell = money. Money + Wendy = New Car) "You know what, I'll enter your tournament, but I'm not watching any other fights. I still hate guys fighting."

Robbie rubbed his arm in guilt.

"Y-Yes, just make sure you compete. You can all follow me young warriors!"

So they followed Chutzpar through the woods as they swapped stories with one another. "So Dipper _the Destroctor_ actually tried to be like you guys?" Wendy asked as Chutzpar moved a boulder out of the way.

"Yes, but he refused to slay the Multi-bear, thus not gaining the title of MAN! But after that triangle thing, we're all cool now."

Wendy felt impressed that Dipper didn't go through with their stupid ritual. She even imagined what Dipper would look like as a brainless mass of muscle.

"And here we are!" Chutzpar lead them into cave with a bunch of other Manotaurs training as multiple mystical creatures grabbing food and merchandise.

"Thompson, you know you have to jug that entire smoothie machine." Nate pointed to a smoothie machine operated by a Cyclops.

Wendy walked up to the sign-in booth and noticed she needs to come up with a nickname. "Let's see … Lumberjack Gal? RedBlaze? Lumberdevil? Lumberdork? Heh, not unless I'm in a tag-team with Dipper." After coming up with other names, she finally decided on the tile 'Wendy the Barbarian'.

After completing and submitting, Chutzpar took them to the battle armor room. "Changing rooms are other there and that giant centipede is there so no peeping toms get any ideas. If of course none of you teenagers would want to do that." He looked directly at Nate, Lee, Robbie, and Thompson. "RIGHT!? …." Then turned to Wendy and Tambry. "RIGHT!?"

"Yes." They all said.

"Good!"

Wendy picked her outfit and changed into a 'fake' leopard skin amazon clothing that Disney would allow. "So what do you think?" She did a heroic pose to her friends.

"Awesome!" They all shouted as Tambry took a picture.

"Attention fighters!" a Manotaur shouted. "Get your butts into the ring! We'll be starting now!"

"Well here I go. Wish me luck, dudes!" Wendy winked at them and followed the other fighters into the state.

"Nate, you got cash for snacks? I'm empty here." Lee asked as Robbie and Tambry checked their empty pockets.

"No, what a bummer." Nate sighed.

"Ahem." Thompson opened his jacket and took out just a few of the snacks he stored.

"Thompson! Thompson! Thompson!"

At the ring, Wendy stood with the Manotaurs and other creatures as an announcer was speaking. "Men and Women! Give if for our leader, Leaderar!"

Wendy and the majority of smaller creatures, (and Thompson) was startled by the loud vibrations of each step from a giant, black furred Manotaur coming through a large door, leading by a girlish scream from Thompson.

"I am Leaderar, and you all think you can win the prize." To Thompson's horror, Leaderar dug into his bare chest and took out a large diamond. "This is your reward if you win. But besides one, no mortal had ever defeated us …. Or a Corduroy."

"Corduroy, right here!" Wendy shouted.

Leaderar glared at the redhead teen. "Hm, haven't seen your family in a while. So be it." He sat down in a large thrown. "Your opponents will be chosen through this."

Wendy and the others took number cards from a Gnome. Wendy's care had a blue 1 on it and found a Manotaur with a yellow 1 card.

"Two of each numbers exists. Now anyone who chose 1 stay on the stage and the rest GET OFF!"

Everyone ran off, leaving the first two contestants, Wendy and a Manotaur.

"I'm not afraid to punch a woman!" the Manotaur shouted.

"Go Go, Wendy! Go Go!" Wendy's friends shouted.

The lumberjack girl cracked her knuckles. "Alright, let's see what you got."

A Gnome took off an arm of a walking skeleton and rung the bell.

The Manotaur roared like a beast, whic made Wendy felt a bit sick from his breath coming towards her. He rushed on over, but Wendy just leaped over him and tripped him to the ground. The Manotaur quickly stoop up and tried to smash her. Wendy narrowly dodged and punched the Manotaur in the face.

The fight lasted a little while before Wendy pulled a sneaking trick and pretend to let the Manotaur take the lead. The beast swung at her as she walked back to the edge of the stage. Right before the Manotaur punched her face, Wendy ducked and pulled his arm, leading him right off the stage and landing face first in the ground.

"Our first winner, Wendy the Barbarian!"

Everyone cheered for the Barbarian's first victory. "Yeah, woot, woot, woot, woot, woot." Wendy chanted with the crowd.

Leaderar looked at the girl curiously. "Very clever. Not even Manly Dan would think of that."

Wendy left the stage and took a jug of water as the next fight went on. "Man; that was awesome!" She then heard the shouting of the next fighters as they mercilessly beat the stuffing out of each other. "But still I can't believe I entered a competition where guys just fight each other." She overheard a loud painful cry and took a deep sigh. "But at least this is just a tournament and not something stupid like fighting over a girl. I'll just bare through this and win it so I can get myself enough cash for a new car. Well once I turn 16 …. Next month….." Wendy leaned back and breathed slowly. "Alost been three years since I turned 13 ….." Wendy closed her eyes and hugged her legs close as she closed her eyes in deep thought.

"And the winner is the Beagle Bagel Eagle!"

Wendy's concentration broke as she blurted out a laugh. "Beagle what?!" She ran out to see the sin against nature and started laughing uncontrollably. "O.K., that thing made my day!" She looked at the large diamond next to Leaderar and imagined how much money she will get from it. "Sorry Chutzpar, but the next champion is going to be Wendy the Barbarian!"

'Ba ba barbarian'

'Ba ba barbarian'

(A montage played out of Wendy owning every single mystical creature.)

'Wendy the barbarian'

'Skinny but a Weapon!'

'Her father and bros'

'Are crazy and uncontrollable!'

YES WE ARE

(Wendy upper-cut a Pterodactyl and knock-out a golem)

'Dipper and Mabel are back home'

'Of the land of Piedmont'

'They fled to go to school'

'Now Soos is the BOSS!'

(Wendy swirled a turtle dragon by the tail and threw a single-winged silver hair guy off the stage)

'Wendy, her dad and bros'

'Brave and bold, yes'

'They are the greatest heroes'

'And we got plenty more'

'Barbarian'

'Ba ba barbarian'

'Ba barbarian'

'Ba ba barbarian'

'Ba barbarian'

'Ba ba barbarian'

"Sorry, no catchphrase!"

Wendy held her foot on top of a Gremoblin and won the semi-finals.

"Everyone, the finale shall begin soon. Fighters, stop being thirsty and drink!"

The audience cheered as Wendy's friends met her. "Wendy, you are awesome!" Nate and Lee shouted.

"Thank you, and thank you." Wendy bowed. "Now I just need to beat the last guy and I'm out of here."

"Yeah …." Thompson moved his fingers a bit. "Wendy, you didn't watch the other matches, right?"

"That's right." Wendy glared at the beaten fighters moping around. "That beagle thing was hilarious, but I still don't like this. I fight only when necessary. And money for a new car is totally necessary."

"And I won't have to borrow my mom's van." Thompson said. "But really, the next guy is …. Weeeeell ….. A TOTAL NIGHTMARE!"

Despite his warming, Wendy just smirked. "Look guys, I've survived Weirdmageddon and seen some crazy stuff. What can this guy possibly be?

The bell rung three times, meaning that the final match is about to begin.

"Nevermind, I'll just see for myself." Wendy ran off ahead and jumped right into the ring. "Alright, let's see the next sucka who YIKES!" Wendy jumped back to see her next opponent. It looks like a shriveled up zombie, but no signs of decay or missing limbs. His eyes were bright yellow, and his lipless mouth showed sharp teeth.

"The final fight is about to begin!" Leaderar shouted. "Wendy the Barbarian vs. Good Old Timer!"

The desperately skinny creature coughed and then laughed. "A teenager fighting someone my age? How disrespectful. Well at least you're in good shape to reach this far, unlike the rest of your generation with your computer phones and T.V. pads." He called out to the audience. "Isn't that right, honey?"

"Yyyyyyyep. The general has some oven mats." Another female zombie thing said as she knitted a sweater.

"You got to be kidding me." Wendy slapped her face. "I'm fighting an old geezer who doesn't understand or care about today's trend."

The creature laughed like an old creep. "At least I exercise."

"And starve yourself like a supermodel."

That last remark made the creature laugh more. "Good one. Just for that, I won't eat ya."

"Wait what?"

The bell rung again and Leaderar announced the final fight.

Wendy held her fist ups, ready for the old man's next move. The monster smiled devilishly and suddenly vanished out of thin air.

"Where did he-" Wendy scanned her surrounding and saw that he teleported near the edge of the stage, or just ran superfast and almost ran off at the last second.

"You old coot!" shouted the elder woman monster. "What did I tell you about running on your old legs?"

"Quiet woman, I'm a fightin' here!" the old man shouted to his wife.

"Fighting? Since when?"

"What do you mean, 'since when'? I've been wrestling this whole time!"

"What time is it?"

"Why are you asking me that now?"

"I need to take my pill."

"Then do it you nagging lady."

"Do what?"

"Take your pills!"

"We have bills to pay?"

"Pills!"

"My name's not Dil."

"Your medicine!"

"I'm Mexican?"

"NO! I SAID ….. why am I on the ground?" the creature looked at his surroundings. He was lying on the ground off the stage and above him stood a confused looking Wendy who just decided to push him off while he was arguing with his wife.

Wendy looked at her friends and Tambry shouted out, "They didn't argue up until now."

Leaderar stood up and shouted. "Wendy Corduroy is our new champion!"

Everyone cheered for the lumberjack girl as her friends ran ahead.

"I can't believe you've won!" shouted Thompson. "I was so worried!"

"As if she can lose." Nate said as Lee high-fived him.

"These pictures are going to have so many likes." Tambry said as she showed them to everyone.

"Send that one to the twins." Wendy said, pointing at the one of her posing. "They are going to be so jealous they didn't get to see this."

"Especially Dr. Fun Times who has a crush on you!" Lee teased.

A Gnome walked up to them with a picture. "Everyone say cheese for the new champion!" Wendy and her friends gathered together for their momentum photo.

The photo was taken and hung on the Wall of Winners.

"You were amazing!" Chutzpar said. "Just like a true Corduroy."

Wendy grinned at the Manotaur as everyone cheered. "No problem-o. I am a flippin Corduroy after all."

"I can't believe you lost to a child!"

"It wasn't me, it was your fault!"

"My vault?"

"Ugh!"

Wendy noticed the zombie couple walking by and spoke to them. "Hey, great fight out there."

The two looked at each other and laughed. "Whelp, I could have one if we didn't start arguing again." He wrapped his boney arms around his wife. "But that's what half of marriage is."

"Half arguing, half talking normally. All full love." The female and male nuzzled their noses together, which made the teens want to barf, for real this time. "Well we better get going. We were on a search, but my husband begged me to come here."

"Hey, we had fun."

"We have fudge?"

"I told you to put your hearing aid in before breakfast!"

The two old couple walked away arguing as Wendy waved goodbye.

"Well that was something." She turned to Chutzpar. "What the heck were those guys anyway?"

Chutzpar only shrugged. "They're just tourists so who cares."

Wendy then noticed the beautiful rock two Manotaurs were carrying towards them. "Sweet, I'm in the money!" Wendy gave a big grin, showing off her white teeth as they set the diamond down, only for it to be smashed to pieces by a big hammer.

"….Whaaaaa…"

"Here is your reward, now eat!" Chutzpar said. "… Eat … eaaaat …. Oh oh ooooooh!" Chutzpar laughed up a storm. "I am sorry, Young Corduroy. I've forgotten to tell you we give the name 'diamond' to 'jawbreakers', no valuable rocks.

Wendy's jaw dropped to the ground. "Bu-Bu-Bu-Bu-Bu." Wendy stopped herself and took a deep breath to calm herself. "I …. I had fun. That's all that matters." She shook off her thoughts of buying a car out of her mind. "So … let's talk about something else." She said while holding her rage.

Chutzpar rubbed his chin. "Why not I show you the past winners and your ancestors?"

"Good …. Good …. Just get it over with." Wendy and the teens were showed by Chutzpar the pictures of all the winners, all Manotaurs and Corduroys.

Despite her hopes being crushed, she found it cool to know more about her family, which she is going to ask more from her father that kept all this a secret.

"And this is your father." Chutzpar showed her a picture of a younger Manly Dan. "Out of everyone, he had won the most tournaments in a row, until that fateful day."

"What happened?" Wendy asked, expecting a backstory that involves a life lesson.

"It was two decades ago." Chutzpar spoke. "When your father and the mysterious fighter competed in the finals."

(Flashback)

A young Manly Dan broke a boulder in his hands as another man, dressed in a trench coat and bandages covering his enter face except his eyes, checked his watch, looking a bit impatient.

Manly Dan, filled with the mixture of certain emotions that will lead to complete failure, rushed after his opponent. Looking as if he needs to leave now, the mystery man punched Dan in the face, causing him to be flung right off the stage. The cloaked man ran up to Leaderar, shook his hand, took the giant piece of jaw breaker on his shoulders, and ran out."

(End flashback)

"After that, Manly Dan never entered a tournament again." Chutzpar said. "He didn't look hurt or cried like a baby. Instead he did what true men do, shout loudly and punch things."

"That's dad alright." Wendy sighed. "But that mystery man, who is he?"

"No one knows, even to this day." Chutzpar said. "We only have his nickname, 'Wind of a Hurricane'."

"Nicknames are the coolest!" Nate and Lee shouted.

Robbie smiled. "So someone is stronger than Manly Dan, wonder what's his deal is."

"Good mystery for Dipper and Ford to figure out." Wendy said. "But right now I'm going straight home and have a nice talk with my dad." She gave a thumb up to Chutzpar. "Thanks for the time, but we need to get going. We got plans to talk with the twins online soon."

"Far well, and give our greetings to Dipper the Destroctor!"

"Hey Thompson, I dare you to eat that jaw breaker that was literally inside that monster's chest." Lee said to the gang's punching bag.

"On it!" Thompson smiled and put one in his mouth.

"Yeeeew, nasty!" Nate said. "Wait, shouldn't there been blood coming out of Leaderar's chest after that?"

Tambry showed Wendy the photo of her posing. "So they said that Mabel got a camera for online chat?"

"That's right." Wendy answered; finally relieved they can actually talk with each other instead of just through the phone. "Send them that picture and tell em we'll talk tonight after I ask my dad a few things."

"On it." Tambry send the pic through each twin's email address.

* * *

The email opened up and revealed the message and picture.

With his heart stopping, Dipper Pines gazed at the picture of Wendy wearing her barbarian outfit. His face turned tomato red and his pupils shrunk before the thirteen year old fell right off his chair.

"Dipper?" Mabel walked in and saw her brother on the ground. "Dipper, are you O.K.!" She looked at the photo of Wendy. "Ooooooooh."

 **End of Chapter**

 **X mltbocri tfka lkzb yibt xzolpp Doxsfqv Cxiip, yrq tebob afa fq dl?**

* * *

 **Story Requests Info**

So yeah, this guy/girl named 'Cowardly Christian 'du911' wanted me to write a story where Wendy enters a Manotaur fighting tournament and to make a family connection with the Lumberjack ghost from 'Northwest Mystery Mansion' (and that part with Dipper).

Thanks for his brilliant idea; I've decided to allow other people to give their suggestions, WHEN I CURRENTLY WANT THEM TOO! This means I do not want to hear any request right now until I ask for them in a future chapter.

When I am looking for one, I will take one request from a single person and discuss with them about it. I may reject an idea if it goes against any planned future chapters, does not fit well with Gravity Falls's canon, or just stupid. Do not ask for a reason if don't give one.

Also they must be a one-shot, no multi-parters or arcs.

All requests and discussions must be submitted through Personal Messaging only and only one per person will be chosen for each requested chapter space. If your idea gets chosen, you will not be able to submit another idea again.

Which also means that you MUST have an official account on here in order to ask for a request. But each requested story posted will be given credit, so free advertising for you!

Thank you for reading this thoroughly, I hope you actually read it, because I will ignore all request when I'm not interested or given in reviews, so please don't send me one now!


	22. Father of Wendy

**Chapter 22:** Father of Wendy

"Alright, we're almost there." Wendy led her friends down a hill through the woods. Night had fallen and their parents have given them several messages to return home now.

"Ugh, I've read the first one, mom." Robbie put away his phone. "Tambry, how do you do it? Getting your parents' texts over and over and still look at your phone."

"I don't." Tambry said with an exhausted glare as she tries fighting between looking at her phone and ignoring her parents' texts.

Wendy on the other hand wasn't receiving any texts. Instead she just shook a bag of that rock candy she won in her hands (pieces from the inside, of course). "So glad my dad's fingers are too big for touch phones. Just as long as I get home in time, I won't have to hear him yelling."

"I'd rather have non-stop text messages than having Manly Dan as a Dad." Robbie spoke.

"…. I'm sorry, what was that?"

Robbie's heart skipped a beat upon hearing Wendy's question. "Woah there, no offence to you and your muscle dad. It's just …. Well….."

"He's scary!" Thompson shouted. "Just look at him, he's a berserker! What if you make a mistake and he gets furious!"

"Geeze, relax." Wendy smiled at her panicked friend who could give Dipper a run for his money in an anxiety contest. "He's not that bad. In fact between me and you guys, my dad-"

Suddenly they all stopped in front of a large wired gate surrounding what looks like an empty plot covered in native plants.

"That way. That way. THAT WAY!" Wendy shouted as they all walked around the plot. "As I was saying, my dad can actually be a big softy sometimes."

"I don't believe you." said Tambry.

"I can't believe you." said Thompson.

"I don't care." Robbie said with a snarl. "So what if he's a pansy ….. I mean that's cool!" he chuckled half-heartily after receiving another glare.

"So my dad is actually really sweet when-"

"Ha, I get the joke!" Nate laughed.

"Me too!" Lee and Nate high-fived each other.

The redhead sighed. "Any more distractions?"

"Actually we're getting real close to town." Tambry pointed out the town lights. "And you live over there, so we'll talk tomorrow?"

"Sure thing." Wendy waved goodbye to her friends. "Just don't think less of my dad after this."

"I won't!" shouted Thompson.

Wendy could only chuckle as she walked down the quiet town of Gravity Falls. Nothing to break the harmonic-

"Gimme all your money! DAH!"

After Wendy knocked a mugger out cold (along with a tooth) and Blubs and Durland coming in to beat him some more, the lumberjill continued her stroll back home.

"Haven't had some peace and quiet in like forever." Wendy stretched her arms, practically wishing she can fall asleep now. "But of course I'll probably find some windows broken and some landmines in the house by some new family pet …. Actual landmines."

Wendy then noticed a father and daughter walking on the other side of the road. "At least my bros and Dad can be cool sometimes. Even dad." Wendy looked up into the night sky and thought about a sweet moment between her and her old man.

(Ten years ago)

"Weeeeeeeeeeee!" A five-year old Wendy was playing airplane with Manly Dan. The small girl just laid on her father's hand as the muscular titan ran around the yard. "I'm Wonda Wendy!"

"And here comes the alien invasion!" Dan swooped her towards a squirrel that ran off in fear.

"Puw Puw!" Wendy pretended to zap the squirrels with her laser visions. "I'm the best there is!"

"Except for Captain Tickle Monster!" Dan placed Wendy on a boulder and started tickling his little girl. The two laughed together as they slowly stop to relax and watched the clouds go by.

"Dat one looks like a butterfly!" Wendy pointed upwards.

"And that one looks like a wood chipper." Dan showed Wendy the cloud he's looking that.

"Looks like a tank to me, but I see a Gorilla over there!"

"And there's a bear trap!"

"And there's a dragon!"

"And there's a truck!"

"And there's a flying horse!"

"And there's horse meat dinner!"

"And there's an owl!"

"And there's a giant fist!"

"And there's a fox!"

"And there's a rock!"

"And there's a fish!"

"And there's spear fishing!"

"And there's a dinosaur!"

"And there's a chainsaw."

"And there's a deer!"

"And there's a bonfire!"

"And I see … uhhhhhhhhhh … I dunno."

"… I got nothing either!"

(End Flashback)

"Good times …. Good times." Wendy leaped over a fire hydrant and recalled another moment.

(Ten years ago)

"Daddy?" Five-year old Wendy walked up to her father, bringing in her tricycle inside. "I saw a cute boy when me and Tamb were riding our machines! I'm I too young to date?'

"Date? Date? DATE!?" Dan roared into the air. "Where's that no good BOY!?"

(End Flashback)

Wendy nearly lost it from her memory. "I would have felt so sorry for that kid if my dad actually found him! …." Wendy stopped for a moment. "Strange, I feel like Mabel is going to crack some serious jokes on me." She looked around and saw no one. "Meh, probably nothing."

Wendy continued her walk as she recalled one more memory, a memory that was not so long ago.

(Two years ago)

"Shhhtupid grlass. Shtupid chemicals. Shtupid rug. Shtupid vacuum."

A braced-teethed, thirteen year old Wendy was doing housework around her cabin. As she tried cleaning the window, her saliva would spray over the cleaned spots, making her go over the areas with a chemical she really hates the smell of.

Then suddenly, a baseball was throw into the window and hit Wendy straight in the eye. "OW!" Wendy fell over and removed the ball off her face.

"NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO!" Suddenly her younger brothers came in, fear taking over every inch of their goosebumps covered bodies. "SORRY WENDY! SORRY WENDY! DON'T TELL DAD!"

"Don't tell me what?" The kids heard Dan crashing through the door. "What's going on … Wendy!"

The boys shook, but Wendy quickly stood up. "Shorry, thish was my fault." Wendy pointed to her eye. I shlipped on the floor and hit my eye on thish basheball on the floor …. That a… monkey threw in through the window." She pointed at the broken glass.

"Oh, O.K." Dan calmed down and opened the freezer. "I'll take care of your eye. Boys, seek vengeance!"

"Y-Yes Dad!" the boys saluted and ran outside. Manly Dan filled a plastic back with ice and put it on Wendy's eye. "Don't go thinking I don't know what the boys actually did."

Wendy gulped.

"Look, I know we're crazy and I'm a loser at house work." They both looked at the broken door. "But I'm proud of you."

(End Flashback)

Wendy ended her thoughts when she walked inside the cabin. The house looked like there wasn't any rough housing today. She smelled the air and began drooling. "Pizza…." She walked inside to see her family chowing down on pizza, but there was one box on the counter with the note saying 'Wendy'. She smiled softly before acknowledging her presence.

"Hey Wendy." The boys said, before turning their focus back on the pizza.

"Wendy!" Dan called. "Take a seat and joined the rest of the Corduroys."

Wendy opened her box and took out a slice with her favorite toppings, anchovies.

"Why does Wendy like gross fish?" The youngest brother asked.

"Maybe it's just that you got bad taste." Wendy teased as she took a slow bite in front of him, just for the heck of grossing him out.

"Ewwwww!"

Dan and the others laughed. "Boy, you've eaten termites during out Survival Training. Why are you freaked out by fish?"

Wendy laughed along with her family. "By the way, I got some rock candy." She placed the back on the table. "Dig in, and Dad you should definitely try this."

They each took a piece and placed it in their mouths. The boys thought it was pretty good, not the best, but at least it wasn't vegetables. Manly Dan however found the taste rather familiar. He rolled the piece in his mouth with a stern glare until it finally hit him.

"Wendy, where did you get this?"

"Oh some place familiar to you." Wendy folded her arms. "There was this big event going on. Now what was it?" She playfully asked herself. "Oh yeah, it was the …" Wendy slammed her hands on the table and looked at her father straight in the eyes. "Manly-ness Man Macho M-Fights!"

The boys looked at their sister and father confusingly. Dan had a blank face on, but then started laughing. "Ha, so you've found out the Manotaur's Tournaments already."

"Uh?" the boys tilted their heads.

Dan looked at the candy and smiled. "Wendy, did you win this?"

"Who else?" She smiled as Dan gave a great big prideful laugh. "Well boys, looks like I have to tell you all about the Manotaur's fighting tournaments!"

The next half hour was spent by Manly Dan telling stories about the Manotaurs and the Corduroys competing in their fighting tournament. Wendy even threw in her side of the story on how she won the latest won.

"And so I just tipped the old zombie guy while he was arguing with his wife. I can't believe how easy that was."

The men of the house all howled with laughter. "Wendy, you are true to your heritage, embrace it!"

"And just wait till I turn 16." The eldest son said.

Manly Dan laughed, but then a horrid reminder came up. "Right, Wendy you'll be 16 next month in October."

"I know." Wendy softly smiled. "And here I was hoping I could sell their so called 'Diamond' so I can buy myself a new car."

"That is if you get your licenses." Dan said after chucking a soda. "Now remember, only I can teach you how to drive. Not your friend Robbie or Thompson."

"Don't worry about those two." Wendy smiled, thinking about the two boys shaking in fear as Dan's shadow casts over them.

"Wow, 16 in a month." The middle boys said. "You're going to be our ride forever!"

"Don't push your luck." Wendy smirked, but a sudden urge to change the subject came to her. "So anyway, why'd you stop going to that Fight Club?"

"Simple answer." Dan said. "Life." He then wrapped his big arms around his family. "Which include you crazy kids!"

After a good moment, they put away their leftovers and cleaned up the table. "Well I'm going on an online chat with the Pines Twins." She tightened her Pine Tree cap. "I can't wait to tell them about that fight and …. That guy." She turned to Dan. "Say Dad, I was told about this one time you got beaten by a guy with just one punch."

"What guy?" Dan asked.

"Some mystery man with his face covered in bandages. His nickname was 'Wind of a Hurricane'."

Manly Dan suddenly turned silent. Wendy and the others just looked at his frozen emotionless face.

"Dad….?" Wendy waved her hand in front of his face, no respond. "Daaaaaad … Bacon doesn't exist anymore."

Still nothing.

"Dad, DAD!?" All his children latched onto him and shook and slapped him desperately. They finally snapped him out of it when the youngest Corduroy poured a bucket of ice cold water on him.

"Where am I!?" Dan jumped up and looked around to see his confused kids. "What year is it?"

"Same as yesterday." Wendy answered. "What was that all about?"

"Oh … hm." Dan scratched his head with his large finger. "You know what, I don't remember that guy that well."

"Well something must have happened to put you in the zone." Wendy folded her arms. "Anything important you do remember?"

"Well …. I think his has something to do with …. Eyeballs?"

"Eyeballs?" the boys asked.

"Meh, probably nothing. I'll see you all tomorrow morning." Dan waved goodnight to his kids and walked upstairs.

"Good night." The boys all said, without giving a second thought on what Dan had answered.

As they all climbed upstairs, Wendy was left their lost. "Eyeballs?" Wendy scrunched her face in thought. "The heck is Dad talking about? I can understand if he only met him once, but what was with that long pause. Even Old Man McGucket would talk more about his crazy ideas. Even though he's better after ….." Just like a jolt of lighting, a sudden realization struck her. "I gotta tell the dorks about this!"

Wendy rushed upstairs into her room and opened up her laptop and connected her camera into it. "Come on, come on …."

A window opened up and Wendy found an open chat room titled 'Your Favorite Dorks'. "Bingo!" Wendy clicked on it and waited to get connected. "Let's see …. Someone super stronger than my dad who used to be a part of them … That doesn't match anyone from …. Looks like we missed one!"

All Wendy could do now was just sit there and wait to be connected; hoping that what she had discovered will not threaten them in the future.

 **End of Chapter**

 **Lyifsflrp lc qeb mxpq fp tolkd. Qexq ibpplk txp qxrdeq, yrq albp lkb pqfii klq hklt?**


	23. Emails and Live Chats: 2

**Chapter 23:** Emails and Live Chats part 2

"…..Uhhhh, where am I?" Dipper opened his eyes and found himself on his bedroom floor. "How long was I out …. And why am I completely wet?!" Dipper stood straight up to see that he was soaked from head to toe. "How the heck did this happened?!"

His answer quickly came with Mabel holding a bucket of water. "Fifth time's the charm!" Mabel looked at her active brother. "Dipper, you're awake!" Mabel threw the bucket on herself. "We are Drip and Mud Pines!"

"Out." Dipper pointed out the door. "Need to get change."

"In front of them?" Mabel pointed at the computer.

Dipper turned around to see Pacifica, Candy, and Grenda on screen. "What the, how long were you girls there for?" He asked; feeling a bit embarrassed from his last words.

"As soon as Mabel found you unconscious." Pacifica answered. "So why did you faint, something more terrifying than that Lumberjack ghost?" Pacifica asked playfully. "….. Is it?" She swiftly turned concern. "Please don't tell me they can travel through the internet."

"The way people act online, that could be a God-send." Candy spoke. "Tell us, Mabel-girl. What made Dipper faint?"

Dipper felt real embarrassed, but actually forgot what caused him to faint in the first place.

"A picture of Wendy dressed like a cave girl." Mabel answered.

Dipper hid his face with his lumberjack hat. "Can we please change the subject?"

"No!" Mabel answered as she opened up a message. "Tambry said that Wendy entered a fighting tournament, and won!"

"Wait, what?" Dipper turned to see the message. "But Wendy hates when guys fight. Wait; was it an all-girls fight?"

"Don't even think about it." Mabel scorn Dipper before the girls starts teasing him.

"I say, I didn't know you had some barbaric habits." Pacifica laughed.

"So, found any good mysteries in that park?" Candy asked.

"Yeah, like a gopher that can burp the ABC's!" Grenda said; which caused Pacifica to feel sick.

"Nope, but Dipper's hat here got stolen by some porcupine mutant." Mabel lifted up Dipper's hat and the boy tried reaching for it as Mabel pulled it back farther. "Dipper and my new crush chased after him, but got ambushed by his buddies." Mabel dropped the hat back onto Dipper's head and reached for a lamp. "But then this fireball ran in and saved the day. Dipper said it mauled one and completely obliterated another with a sunlight laser from its mouth! Blaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!"

"…. And Gravity Falls has weirder things than that?" Pacifica asked.

"Yep, we should tell you about the Trickster that tried to gobble us for not eating loser candy." Candy said as Grenda stuck her tongue out.

"I actually like loser candy." Pacifica whispered to herself. "And you're going to catch that fire thing no matter what, right?"

"What else?" Dipper smiled. "Besides, we were told by a fairy named Lightning that that fireball is the guardian that lives in the park. But since Lightning is being secretive on the subject, we just need to figure out what exactly it is."

"I have full trust that you will accomplish your investigation, Doctor Pines." Pacifica and Dipper chuckled, which pushed some brain cogs in Mabel's head.

On the computer, two windows opened up. "Eeeeeh, Beethoven and Dyami! You guys, act causal!" Mabel opened the pages and out came the two boys.

"Hello, Dipper and Mabel." Dyami greeted his friends.

"H-Hey Mabel." Beethoven noticed the other girls. "Oh, you must be her friends." Beethoven put on a cool act. "Yeah, I am Beethoven. I'm like the guard at Eggbert Middle School. Always looking out for others, including Mabel here. So yeah I'm a good suggestion, I mean friend!"

"And I will be Dyami, a paranormal enthusiast just like Dipper." Dyami bowed to the girls, causing them to giggle.

"A pleasure to meet you, Dyami. I am Pacifica Northwest, the once richest family in Gravity Falls, and formal enemy of Mabel Pines."

"What a cutie." Candy whispered to Grenda. "We are Candy and Grenda."

"I have an animal on my shoulder!" Grenda showed Dyami the lizard she sometimes carries.

"Oh, amazing!" Dyami gawked at the lizard. "Speaking of amazing, have the twins tell you about the four-legged animal-like flame that saved us? ….. Why are both of you wet?"

"Dipper fainted from a picture of Wendy, so I poured five buckets of water on him, and one on me!" Mabel held up her soaked-sleeved covered arms.

Dipper sighed from embarrassment. "We did tell them, and yes it was awesome! I am so glad we ran into that girl!"

"Huh?" Both three girls asked.

"A girl you say? Do tell." Pacifica asked as Candy and Grenda started grinning.

Dipper noticed the looks on their faces. "Oh no, it's not like that at all."

And of course, our favorite Shooting Star unscrewed the lightbulb from the lamp and held it about her head, and dropped it from the heat.

"Ow ow ow ow ow!" Mabel panted her hands on her wet sweater. "Dipper; she could be a new potential crush for you!"

"Mabel, please." Dipper shook his hands. "We only saw her once, and that's probably the only time we will."

"Don't be a party pooper, Dipper. Come on, Diiiipper, Diiiipper, Diiiii….. unless you want to date him, Pacifica."

Both Dipper and Pacifica turned tomato red. "Wait, wait, stop!" they both said which made Mabel and her friends want to squeal.

Suddenly another window opened. "Huh, who can that be?" Mabel clicked it and out came a very unwelcomed guest.

"Mabel, my darlin!"

"Gideon!?" Mabel was swift on her feet to click the X on the window before Gideon could say anything else.

"Isn't that the psychic that turned out to be a fraud?" Pacifica asked as Candy and Grenda nodded.

"And he's obsessed with me! Blaaaah. How'd he even get connected?"

"Because you literally emailed everyone in Gravity Falls your Chatroom page." Dipper pointed out. "Seriously, Mabel. You can't be too friendly you know."

Then the window opened up again. "That's must be Gideon again." Mabel sighed and closed it.

* * *

"….. I guess the kids don't want to talk to us now." Stanford and Stanley frowned sadly as they sat on their boat in the middle of the lonely sea.

* * *

"You know, Gideon did give me the key to your dream bubble before. And I told him that if he wants you to love him, then he have to make himself into someone worth loving."

"….. Wow, that was actually good romantic advice." Dyami said as everyone else agreed.

"Yeah, where did that come from all of a sudden?" Mabel asked, with mixed thoughts of learning more romantic advice from her brother, and the potential for more match making.

"Yes, that was something." Pacifica found this really impressing from the boy she only got to know once, and then a hint of red form on her cheeks.

"You feeling alright, Pacifica?" Candy asked.

"Uh, yes! Just getting warm in here" Pacifica answered with a bit of nervousness.

" _Don't think I didn't notice that one, Pacifica_." Mabel thought to herself, but made an obvious 'catcha' look.

"Now what is up with you today?" Dipper asked his sister. "Now let's get our minds off that and focus on our findings." Dipper held up the pictures of the flaming creature.

"I can't believe I'm looking at internet photos of strange creatures and believing them." Pacifica said as Candy and Grenda became excited. "Guess I'm finally a common folk now."

"But you're still technically rich." Candy answered.

Then several windows opened up. "That must be our fellow teenagers!" Mabel opened each one and out came Robbie, Tambry, Lee, Nate, Thompson, and last but not least, Old Man McGucket.

"Wee he he. I'm using the internal net!" McGucket laughed. "Howdy Pines Twins! Teenagers that used to go on my property, other kids and that rich girl, and two strangers."

They all waved to McGucket (mostly out of awkwardness).

"Mabel, Doctor Fun Times!" Nate said. "Did you read what Tambry sent ya?"

"We sure did!" Mabel grinned and wrapped her arm around Dipper. "And guess what Dipper did? Guess, Guess!"

"Mabel ….."

"Why are you two wet?" Robbie asked. "You know what, never mind. I don't care."

"I pour buckets of water on us!" Mabel grinned goofily.

"Figures."

Lee smirked. "So did you two see Wendy's kick-butt outfit?"

"Dipper sure did!"

"Mabel….!"

The teen then explained to them how Wendy kicked the butts out of every creature like the Gremoblin, the Manotaurs, and even a Beagle Bagel Eagle.

"O.K., I've seen some crazy stuff, but that last one cannot be real." Dipper said.

"Here's your proof." Tambry sent them the picture of the creature and Dipper's jaw dropped. "What am I even looking at?"

"Don't question it; it's too amazing to be nerd-ified." Mabel smiled at the picture of the creature.

"But where does the body even begin? It's-"

"Dipper, don't make me use that Wendy picture on you again."

"Mabel,please-"

"Go on…" the Teens asked as Robbie snorted.

"Ha, I bet that … he fainted because he thought Wendy looked hot since he has a crush on her." Thompson spoke, which shocked Dipper.

"WHAT! Who told you!?"

They all pointed at Robbie. "Hey!" Robbie shouted at everyone. " …. Wait, how are your windows arranged?"

It gave everyone a good moment to realize just happened. "I have you at the center, Robbie." Tambry. But I pointed down … I'm lost."

"Me too." McGucket said. "What are we talking about?"

"Yeah, I'm lost too." Pacifica said. "That wilderness girl beat up some monsters and won."

"Some rock candy." Nate said. "But the last fight was barely that. We were laughing our butts off!"

"Oooow, what happened?" Mabel asked.

"She … she had to fight this zombie grandpa." Lee held in a few chuckles. "But he started arguing with his wife over bad hearing, so Wendy just pushed him off, and it took him ten seconds to realize that."

Everyone else joined in the laugh. "That …. I wish I was there!"

"So you can drool over Wendy."

"Mabel!" Dipper turned to everyone else. "Look, we had a talk about it. I'm no longer trying to get with her."

"Wait, you tried to get Wendy to go on a date with you?" Nate asked; which made Dipper more embarrassed. "You got guts!"

"Heh, thanks." At least they were being supportive.

"Hm, still wouldn't work out" Robbie folded his arms. "But at least I'm with Tambry, right honey?"

"That's right."

Dipper felt sick from seeing them cooing. "Would that have been me and Wendy if it actually happened?"

"I wish that will be me and Mabel someday." Beethoven said.

"You say something, kid?" Lee asked, which Beethoven quickly caught himself. "I was …. Say, where's that Wendy anyway?"

That question actually stumped everyone. "Yeah, she should be here by now." Tambry looked around.

Then another window opened up. "That must be her." Mabel said.

"No one tell her!" Dipper shouted.

"Tell her what?"

"Nevermind!"

Mabel opened the window and Wendy Corduroy appeared. "Finally, you guys need to hear this!"

"Hello, Wendy." Mabel said in a stern voice. "Don't you just respect hellos? They always come first with each greeting."

"I would love to get in on your joke, but I need to ….. did you guys get pushed into a pool?"

"Buckets!"

Dipper straightens his lumberjack hat. "H-Hey Wendy."

"Sup, Dipper." Wendy noticed her dear friend and tilted the Pine Tree cap. "Hope you're taking real good care of it."

"Sure am." Dipper sheepishly smiled. "And you too?"

"Uhhhhh yeah. Totally." Wendy also sheepishly smiled. "So you guys told them about … wait, hold on! You guys really need to hear this …. And you too McGucket …. What are you doing here? Ugh, doesn't matter!"

"Take it easy, Wendy. What's the hold up?" Nate asked.

"I talked to my Dad about the Manotaurs tournaments he used to compete in and when I asked about that mystery guy, he was completely clueless."

"Mystery guy?" Dipper and Mabel looked at each other as Dyami looked excited.

"What are you talking about?" Dipper asked his crush.

Wendy calmed herself down. "Well you know my Dad. Super strong and can't be beat? …. About twenty years ago, someone knocked him out with just one punch in that tournament."

"What?!" Dipper and Mabel asked.

"That loud muscle guy that punches things?" Pacifica asked. "Someone beaten him up?!"

"…. When did rich and spoiled rotten get here?"

"Hey!"

"Wendy, Pacifica." Dipper spoke up. "Let's not start an argument." He looked at Wendy. "So what's going on?"

Wendy briefly explained the mystery man 'Wind of a Hurricane' who hasn't been seen by the Manotaurs since then and her father doesn't remember, all except something about 'eyeballs'. "I know this is thinking too far, but I think this wind guy is or use to be a part of 'The Society of the Blind Eye'."

"The Blind Eye?" Mabel and Dipper gasped.

"Say, isn't that the cult you told us about?" Robbie asked.

"Same one, the one that McGucket started."

They all looked at the Old Man. "The Blind Eye, I've caused a mess of a problem with them." McGucket felt his head with guilt. "But we wiped all the members' memories of the society, but I don't remember anyone stronger than Manly Dan."

"So you're saying he's still out there?" Thompson asked. "I'm scared!"

"Me too!" shouted Beethoven. "I mean I'm the exact opposite of scared."

"… I don't know what's going on anymore." Pacifica spoke.

"Llllooooooooong story." Dipper told her. "But after that, we've heard nothing from the Blind Eye. No one got their memories wiped of Gravity Falls paranormal activities."

Pacifica looked concern and felt her head. "What are you talking about? Did someone mess with my head?"

Wendy finished up saying that it could be possible that he was a Blind Eye. "Yeah, there's nothing official. But I'm just spooked. What normal human being can beat up my Dad, who?"

Everyone else looked frighten, Robbie tried hiding it.

"Uhhhhh. Say can you email us the story so we can catch up on our own time?" Pacifica asked. "These two need to go home soon and I need a cat scan."

"Good night!" Candy and Grenda said.

"Night-y Night!" Mabel said and closed their window.

Dipper felt his chin in thought. "If this Wind guy is a member, there must be some clues back at the museum." He looked directly at Wendy. "When you have free time, can you check the museum again and search all over?"

"Sure thing." Wendy saluted. "McGucket, want to come search with me? You probably remember all of it by now, right?"

"Some of it." McGucket answered. "They've expanded over the thirty years, but I'm in! Yee hah!"

"Hey, don't forget us!" the teens said.

"How can I not?" Wendy grinned widely. "We're all going on a Mystery Hunt."

"Yeah!" Wendy's friends shouted in cheer.

Wendy smiled at the twins. "Sorry you have to miss this one out, but I guess you owe me for not tagging me along on most of them."

"Heh, sorry about that." Dipper rubbed the back of his head. "But we'll go on twice as many next time, together, promise."

"I hope you keep your word, Dipper." Wendy checked the time and yawned. "Well we'll keep an eye out. I think we should get to …. Say what's that?" Wendy noticed the photos on the desk.

"Oh, those are photos of the fire creature that saved our lives." Dyami answered.

"Sweeet. And they're clear enough to see." Wendy looked at the photo Dipper held out. "That so rock! You have your very one mini-Gravity Falls."

"But nothing beats the original." Mabel added.

"A fairy said it's a guardian here, and I'll find out more about it."

"Great, talk to you later. My bed wants me."

"Good night."

"Good night, dork."

"Good night, almost 16 year old."

"Wait, 16?" Dipper asked.

Wendy nervously smiled. "Yep, next month I'll be the big 1-6. Meaning I'll be driving."

"Wow, that's great!" Dipper smiled. "Mabel and I have got to find the best present for you."

"Better than you guys being my friends?" Wendy playfully asked. "Sorry, not possible."

"Nothing is impossible when you have Mabel!" Mabel spoke. "We'll find you a gift on the double!"

"Well I'll talk to you later. Tell me the minute you guys get cellphones. And don't go too crazy looking for my … b… birthday present." Wendy logged off.

Mabel grinned at the thought of finding a gift, but Dipper noticed something off about Wendy. "Is Wendy doing O.K.?"

The other teens looked concern. "Well …. Naw, don't worry about it." Nate said. "We should get to be too. See ya Dr. Fun Times."

"Night."

"Meh, night."

"Whatever."

"I'm Old Man McGucket! See ya all whenever!"

All the teen logged off, leaving only Beethoven and Dyami.

"I don't want to push anything, but Wendy did sound odd while talking about her birthday." Dyami mentioned.

"Maybe she's just nervous about driving?" Beethoven suggested.

"No no no, Wendy doesn't get nervous unless it's a school test." Mabel said.

Dipper thought about it for a moment. "Well I don't want to just dig into her personal life, but right now we have a guardian to find."

"And I'll stand by to the very end." Dyami smiled. "Just imagine what that creature could be."

Beethoven yawned. "Your friends have a good idea. Let's hit the hay."

"O.K.!" Mabel ran out of the room and into her bedroom, jumped up to Waddles' bed, and punched the hay that was in it. "Ha!"

"I'll talk to you guys tomorrow, good night." Dipper logged off and shut his computer down. "Time for bed." Dipper locked his door and changed out of his wet clothing and into a new pair of pajamas his parents bought him over the summer. As he crawled into bed, he first thought about the guardian of the park, but then put his mind on the 'Wind of a Hurricane' that Wendy spoke of. "But still ….. who can beat Manly Dan in just one punch?" He reached over to his lamp at his bedside. "Who or whatever he is, I hope he's not dangerous." Dipper turned the lights off and rested his body and mind from the long day he had from chasing a porcupine, discovering the porcupines to be human hunting monsters, and being saved by his next great mystery.

.

.

.

.

.

"That girl from earlier is actually cute."

"EEEEEEK!"

Dipper practically launched out of bed from the sudden shriek. "MABEL!"

"Don't sweat it, I'd covered my eyes." Mabel said to her frantic brother as she crawled from underneath Dipper's bed. "Night-Night."

 **End of Chapter**


	24. Stan Seas Something

**Happy Birthday Alex Hirsch … I'm not too late, right?**

 **Chapter 24:** Stan Seas Something

In the middle of the Arctic Ocean above the dark sky, the elder Pines twins have just fended off a giant squid and stayed awake passed Midnight in hopes that they could tell their grand niece and nephew about the incident, however they seem to not want to talk to them.

"….. I guess the kids don't want to talk to us now." Stanford and Stanley frowned sadly as they sat on their boat in the middle of the lonely sea.

"And why do I want to punch Gideon now?" Stanley asked himself. "I mean I always do, but I really wanna punch him right this second."

Stanford stood up and patted his brother on the back. "Well we shouldn't worry about it. They must be busy." Stanley stood up as Stanford placed both his hands on his shoulders. "We have another mystery to solve."

"You mean where all the aging mermaids are?" Stanley asked with high hopes.

"No. The next mystery is … how'd we get a good internet connection out here in the middle of the ocean?"

Stanley looked around and became just as bewildered as his nerdy brother. "And how far out are we? We've only been gone for like a few weeks, right?"

"Correct, but it could have been longer without these." Stanford showed his brother the back of the boat …. The stern. That's what it's called. "My very own engine here was able to bring us far out into the middle of the Atlantic Ocean. And since I've installed solar panels, we're able to travel around the world far faster than any modern creation and be back in time for whenever we're needed."

"Like Thanksgiving with the kids." Stanley smiled. "And don't you dare make me miss out on Thanksgiving with the kids back home. I don't want to also miss free food."

"Unfortunately this boat won't travel that fast across the United States since you know, it's just a boat."

"Booooo."

Suddenly a loud beeping sound came from Stanford's pocket. He took a device out and held it over the ocean. "Astonishing! By my calculations, there appears to be a strange energy source below us!" He took out a diving suit to show his twin. "One of us needs to go down and investigate."

"Hey Six Fingers, what century did you dig that from?"

Stanford looked at the old diving suit with the traditional helmet with lid and the long tube attached to the pump.

"I haven't invented portable gills yet." Stanford pointed out in the ocean. "And besides, who knows how long we'll be down there for."

"Not unless we have lungs like Mabel." Stanley cracked a smile. "Three hours she was under that lake just to scare anyone crossing by. I've taken and sold so many hilarious photos like that Thompson kid, and Toby, and also Blubs and Durland." Stanley slapped his knee as he cracks up. "Seriously, I'm sure that MABEL PINES would be great at this."

"Stanley, why did you shout Mabel's name?" Stanford asked his brother.

"I dunno."

"Excuse me, did you say 'Mabel Pines'?" The Stan twins jumped back as a large fish jumped from the water. They rushed to the side to see the submerge creature swimming around and stopped in the center to pop out its human head. "Ahola, I am called ….." He took out a guitar and played a note. "Mermando."

"Does anyone else hear girlish screaming?" Stanley picked his ear. "Saaaay, weren't you that strange kid in Gravity Falls's public pool?"

"Yes, that was me." The merman showed the Stans his tailfin. "I was trapped in that pool for so long until Mabel Pines rescued me and lead me back to the ocean where my family lives."

Then a manatee wearing a crown and a pink dress rose from the ocean and whistled to him in a form of language. Mermando rolled his eyes and sighed quietly.

"No, I am no longer in contact with her."

"Must be ex-crush number 500." Stanley whispered to Stanford.

Stanford looked at the boy with fascination. "Amazing, a merperson. I've studied your kind back at Gravity Falls." Stanford realized their location away from their home. "Speaking of Gravity Falls, how did Mabel bring you back to this side of the world?"

"Oh, I do not live in these frozen waters."

The Manatee wife whistled a familiar tone which Mermando covered his ears annoyance. "I've heard that too many times Princess Enna." Mermando cleared his throat to speak with the twins again. "Technically that's not her name, and I don't live in the Pacific. I my wife and I came from the Gulf of Mexico."

"Wife?!" Stanley blurted out. "O.K., what was the bet? It had to sound way too good for anyone to lose, and then you blew it sky high!"

"No, that is not the case." Mermando said in an unamused tone. "It involved avoiding a war, but I won't go into more details about that."

The Manatee wife whistled an annoyed tone.

"We've traveled here because we have an urgent meeting with the king of these waters."

"King you say?" Stanford scratched his chin and looked at the waters.

"What is he, some giant clam ….. with a giant pearl?"

"Don't even think about it." Stanford said as he pulled the old diving suit away from Stanley. "If a King lives here, I must meet at least a citizen of his people, even a hobo."

Mermando waved his hand in protest. "I am sorry, but the king here is quiet secretive …. To humans ….. because …. Well, no offence to you two, but your people are doing this horrific act." Mermando pointed at a huge pile of plastic floating by.

"Sheesh, I could sell all that." Stanley mentioned.

"Or I can vaporize it like this." Stanford drew a blaster and shot the pile of garbage, reducing it to nothing. "And the best part is that this weapon doesn't affect organic life, watch." Stanford shot the beam at his brother and it works … but not his shirt.

"You're so lucky you only aimed at my chest."

The manatee princess dove underwater in fear.

"And if your king fears that we may expose his kingdom's location, do not threat. We will not reveal anything to the outside world."

"Which is why this genius here won't sell his inventions."

"I'M NOT BUYING GOLD! BYYYYYYYE!... I'm… sorry." Stanford slapped his cheek. "Still having nightmares."

"That is why you need to drink coffee!" Stanley said with confidence. "None of that tea stuff. You need to hit the caffeine."

"Stan, caffeine is dangerous to the health. Tea provides plenty of positive effects to the body."

"Stanford, look at these guns." Stanley flexed his arms. "And I eat ice cream for dinner."

"Should I also mention that Almond milk provides twice as many calcium?"

"I refuse to go vegan!"

"We pretty much have to become vegan in the future!"

"Ahem."

The twins looked at the pre-teen merman. "I am sorry to interrupt this, but you are surrounded by the King's soldiers."

Stan 1 and 2 looked around to see other Mermen pointing their spears around the boat.

"Great, the coppers." Stanley said. "Let me handle em."

"Not on your life." Stanford waved his arms. "Greeting Mermen. We mean you no harm."

Two soldiers whispered to each other. "That what they all say. Heh heh." A dumber looking merman said to the other.

"Dale, these are the first humans we've ever made contact with." The smarter one spoke.

"Ha, that's what you always say." The dumber looking one named Dale said.

(Cutaway)

Dale walked into a café and met Dale. "Hey."

"Dale, these are the first humans we've ever made contact with."

(End Cutaway)

Stanford called out to what looks like the captain of the squad. "We are sorry for trespassing. We are on an expedition to uncover strange anomalies around here."

"Anomalies you say?" The bulky leader looked around his army with a hint of suspicion. "And how did you know about this? You humans shouldn't have-"

"Dale, this is the first hu-"

"Not now, Ted!" the captain shouted. After pushing him away, he'd notice Mermando next to them. "You, are you Mermando, the new husband of the Princess of the Manatees?"

Stanley snorted.

"Yes, that will be me." He nodded his head. "But I know these humans, they are …." He leaned close to the Stans to ask their relation to Mabel. "The Grunkles …. Grunkles?" Stanley whispered the meaning. "The Great Uncles of the kind-hearted human who have saved me. I trust them with all my seventeen hearts. Also he can obliterate the great plague upon our oceans."

"The great plague?" the captain asked. "As in the filth these humans dropped in our oceans as if it won't affect them as well?"

Another pile of garbage floated by, and Stanford demonstrated again with his laser.

The soldiers all 'oooooh'ed at what they saw.

"Incredible." The captain shook his head and looked straight at the twins with gleemy eyes. "This could be our greatest turn against the battle of filth!" The soldiers cheered loudly as the captain shook Stanford's hand. "You must meet out king!"

Stanford's mouth stretched across his face. "Stanley, do you know the vase knowledge we can learn from a hidden race?!"

"Treasure, Babes … Treasure, Babes….." Stanley slowly repeated.

The captain swam over to Mermando. "Mermando, will you be their guide to our way of life?"

Mermando smiled. "I will do anything for Mabel."

His wife folded her flippers and snorted, which was noticed by Mermando, which she wanted.

The sea creatures swum away and a soldier took out a conch shell and blew out of it a large bubble that engulfed the ship. "This bubble will allow your ship to sink to the bottom with your air in tack. For your safety, please-"

"Don't pop it!" Stanford shouted at his pencil wielding brother.

The soldiers and the Stan-O-War II began submerging into the ocean, leading our elder twins to an exciting new discover.

 **End of Chapter**

 **Exmmv? F mrq Jbojxkal fk qebob. Klt pqlm vlro peofbhp.**


	25. Atlantis 2

**Chapter 25:** Atlantis 2.0

"Stanley …. Why were you trying to pop that bubble?"

"Because it would be funny." Stanley shrugged his shoulder. "Thought you, out of everyone else, would have figured that one out, heh."

"…..I'm just going to shut up and enjoy this view."

"You mean the dark endless ocean at night?" Stanley pointed out their black surroundings. As they spoke, the bubble carrying the Stan-O-War II was bringing them down into the bottom floor as the guards guide their way with Mermando and his Manetee wife coming along.

And since it was night, like Stanley mentioned, they weren't able to see any sea creatures swimming by …. Wait hold on.

"Hey Stanford, look at that shark!" Stanley laughed at a football-sized (the American one) shark swimming by them with a single huge tooth in its mouth.

Stanford smiled like a goof and jolted down notes. "Amazing. And that tooth looks so identical to the long-extinct Megalodon …. Wait a minute."

"Stans, look ahead." Mermando turned the twins' focus towards a light downwards. After swimming down farther and farther, the Stans could clearly make out a large underwater utopia with a glass dome over it.

"What is that place?" Stanford asked with amazement as Stanley grinned with excitement.

"Our home." The captain spoke. "Atlantis 2.0."

"A-Atlantis?!" The Stans shouted in surprise.

"As in the lost city of Atlantis? The one Homer wrote about?" Stanford asked a few more questions before the captain spoke up.

"Not the exact one. This is a brand new city after the original was destroyed."

"What happened to the first one? Refugees?"

"STANLEY!" Stanford shouted at his brother before turning back to the captain. "Please don't pay much attention to him. Now can you briefly describe your city?"

The captain smiled. "How can I briefly describe it? It's best that you see it for yourself."

Mermando's manatee wife whistled as they reached the city gates with blue glowing lines around it.

The captain took out a shell necklace and placed it over a sensor which activated the door with some strange technology.

The bubble was sucked right in and the ship was brought into air filled room where two mermen pop the bubble.

"At last, we are here my friends." Mermando said as another door opened to reveal the brightly lit city of Atlantis 2.0.

Coral-like skyscrapers reached the glass dome, blimps filled the air with unfamiliar writing on them, roadways swirled around the buildings with wheel-less vehicles driving by, and on the ground there lies underwater residences, businesses, schools, stores, and other placed which attracted all the merpeople who can swim freely as air breathers can enjoy the above surface areas, which doesn't seem to have a lot of successful businesses.

"Sheesh, they really need tourists here. And I can help with that!" Stanley laughed to himself. "All I need is a trip to the dollar store and set up a 'Surface Museum'!"

"Stanley, show your respect ….. EEEEEEEE!" Stanford gleed as they exit their boat and road a treadmill as the others swam through an artificial stream out of the room. The two brothers were amazed by the city up close and personal. The treadmill brought them everywhere through the high buildings, the well architected roadways, and even through a glass tube to get a close look at all the shops and cafes underwater.

"So, what do you think?" Mermando asked the twins as he swam around the tube. "…. You can hear me through this tube, right?" Mermando received no answer as Stanford wrote down and looked at everything as Stanley was just watching.

"Hm, we should really do something about that sound thing." The captain spoke as he swam with them. "But they look pretty much happy. So why bother them?" The captain said as they watched the overly excited Stanford looking around.

"Can you believe it? Everyone here is so artistic and intelligent." Stanford pointed at a few merpeople painting, building structures, and discussing politics."

"I'm just excited that we're actually on an adventure!" Stanley smiled. "Sure this looks more like a vacation with the locals giving us odd looks, but it beats being alone for thirty years and you in that portal, huh?"

Stanford suddenly became silent.

"Bro …. I … I brought up some bad memories from …. Wherever you've been, huh?"

Stanford took noticed of his worried brother. "Oh … well yes. I mean …. Sorry this turn up. They weren't all bad."

"They?" Stanley asked. "I don't believe it! How many women?"

"No Stanley, not that … unfortunately." Stanford sighed as he looked through the tube of all the merpeople enjoying each other's company. "I know Dipper is dying to learn where I've been all these years, and the beginning is a long story." Stanford took a deep breath. "But after a near death experience, I've managed to escape a great threat and ended up traveling through different dimensions."

"Different dimensions you say?" Stanley grinned with excitement and turned his attention away from the gold shop. "As in different versions of us like where you're the con-artist and I'm book smart ….." Stanley shivered. "Yeesh, that's a weird thought."

"No, what you are thinking are different universe. What I'm speaking of are more worlds with different people and planets, well that can also be considered another universe …. Eh, I won't bother explaining." The two brothers watched outside as Stanford told his tale. "It's true there are other worlds. Some worlds where humanoid animals rule, some taking place in the future or past, mystical or sci-fi worlds, alternate Earths with mass differences, living puppets walking around real people, or annoying with unappealing visuals." Stanford looked up at the skyscrapers and smiled. "It's been lonely traveling through different dimensions, but I've managed to make a few friends on the way." Stanford laughed. "I know for a fact you'll get along just fine with a …. Acquaintance let's say. He was able to create inter-dimensional machines faster than I could and yet has that 'I don't care; heck with you' attitude."

"I like him already." Stanley laughed. "Just imagen all the shenanigans we can do."

"Actually I wanted to create a duplicate invention a friend made that can show you that." Stanford rubbed his chin. "I've emailed the idea to the kids before. It's called the 'What If Machine' invented by a man living in a future world named Professor Farnsworth. It allows users to ask 'What if' questions and show us the possibility. Like say 'What if Rock Women traveled to Earth 5,000 years ago?' it will show us a completely different Earth with strange ruins and creatures."

"I can already hear the 'cha-ching'." Stanley said with dollar signs. "But you better believe that I'll use that machine first until my mind is fresh out of questions. I could see what it will be like if I did bring home gold. Take that, Dad!"

Outside the tube, Mermando and his Manatee wife were speaking. "Wonder what they're talking about?"

Manatee Wife whistled something that caused him to sigh.

"They are the same family as Mabel, I'm sure the cheerful one won't make a move on the princess who's in the same age group as him."

Manatee Wife whistled with irritation.

"It was just one Goodbye kiss! You would have done the same if Dipper saved you!"

The wife whistled a question.

"Oh ha ha. I see where you are going. And no, Dipper will not be interested."

After traveling for nearly a mile, the twins exit the tube to an above water hotel.

"You must be tired after a long night." The guard poked his head out of the water. "I've contacted the manager. Our king will pay for all debts …. That doesn't mean you can do whatever you want!"

Stanley smiled faded.

"… Actually just like the rest of the above water areas, this place is going downhill. So eat, drink, whatever."

Stanley's smile returned. "Race ya to the penthouse!" Stanley ran ahead.

"What a strange man." Mermando said.

Stanford kneeled to the water and shook the Captain's hand. "Thank you for welcoming us to your home. You cannot imagine how excited I am to learn more about your culture and technology."

"No need, you should be thanking the King himself." The guard nodded his head. "Someone will come pick you up after noon tomorrow, please enjoy your stay." The guard dove into the water.

"I must rest too." Mermando yawned. "I still need to speak with the king about that urgent situation. I will see you again in the bright sunny morning …. Even though sunlight can't reach here that well."

Mermando and his wife waved goodbye as they swam away.

Stanford walked into the hotel, consulted with the staff where his brother is, took Stanley off an inflatable 'Finding Dora' ad, question Bisney's power, and took a room with a great view.

"Well, tomorrow is a brand new day." Stanford lay in bed. "I can't even sleep from the excitement!"

"I refuse to sleep!" Stanley smiled. "You heard the captain. The King's going to pay for everything! I am not wasting a single minute!"

"SLEEP NOW!" Shouted what sounded like another air breathing guest from the next room. The horrifying, unidentifiable gender sounding voice struck the twins with enough fear to make themselves tuck into their beds.

"Night bro!" Stanley turned the lamp off.

"Good night, Stanley."

Stanford removed his glasses and turned to his side. After moving around a bit, he found the bed quite comfortable, especially since he had been sleeping on a couch ever since he'd returned home, which was still more comfortable than most placed he'd slept in during his multi-dimensional travels over the lonely thirty years.

But now, not only does he have a bed, his long-broken bond with his brother had finally healed and the 'Beast with Just One Eye' will no longer haunt him. Bill Cipher is gone thanks to the kids and the final blow, quick thinking and the greatest con-artist on his side.

He turned his head to look at his now asleep brother. "Heh, couldn't last ten seconds." Stanford smiled to himself as he slowly drifted off into a well deserve rest where he no longer has to worry about anyone spying on him again ….. or so he thinks.

At the upper corner of the room, a small video camera appeared from a painting of a coral reef and quietly filmed them.

 **End of Chapter**

 **Tev tlria qebv mrq x aov ixka pbzqflk? Qebv'ob klq obxiiv lmbk clo qexq hfka lc qlrofpj.**


	26. The Aged Mermaid

**Shoutout to 'CaketheSnake' on Deviantart for working on a request of mine.**

 **Chapter 26:** The Aged Mermaid

"….Mmmmmm….." Stanley Pines slowly opened his eyes. "Eeeeerrrr …. AAAAH!" Stan instantly woke up and punched a horrifying threat at the foot of the bed. "You won't take me alive …. Bro?"

On the floor, Ford Pines was feeling his nose. "Good morning to you too."

Stanley laughed half-heartily. "Sorry there, it's just …. You were just standing there, smiley like a freak and it's probably 6 a.m., isn't?"

"….. Nooooooo … maybe."

Stanley sighed. "Can I at least get some more shut eye? You do realize that we fought a giant squid and went sight-seeing all passed midnight?"

Stanford stood up and rubbed his nose again. "Sorry, I was just too excited!" He opened the blades and the morning sunlight …. I mean lightbulbs on the dome that imitates daylight, shun right into Stanley's face.

"My eyes!"

Stanford looked out the window to see the city slowly waking up, besides the dry land parts. "I cannot wait to meet the King himself. I hope he has time for all my questions I've pondered in the last hour?"

Stanley yawned with annoyance. "That's good and all. Why not go downstairs and get some free breakfast or whatever and –FREE FOOD!" Stanley rushed out the door in a flash.

"Oh boy." Feeling the worst to come, Stanford ran to the dining hall and found Stanley Pines overloading his plate with literally everything.

"I regret nothing calorie related!" Stanley (still in his boxers and undershirt) sat down and began his fine meal as he munched down everything.

Stanford pinched between his eyes before a lobster man thing walked to him. "For the record, you two are the only guests we have, besides that one other person."

"Really?" Stanford recalled the voice from last night. "Who may that be?"

And of course the lobsterman was cut off by Stanley pulling his favorite brother to the table. "Come here and eat with your brother! When was the last time we shared an actual meal?"

"Too long." Stanford smiled and sat with his brother. "But please, put your clothes on."

After breakfast and getting ready for the day, the twins checked out of the hotel and walked outside. Stanford pointed out a small blimp with the Gondala filled with water for all the merpeople.

"So where to?" Stanley asked with a smile.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN ALL THE FOOD IS GONE?!"

"Away from whatever that was!" Stanford and Stanley dashed off before seeing what in creation could be. Oh well, probably not important.

They walked around town and stopped at some of the dry shops in town.

"Out of business. Out of business. Out of business." They passed by each store in the empty walkway as the Merpeople in the water enjoyed their day. "Seriously, this place needs my help. I can start it off with this!" Stanley took out what looks like a flashlight with a crystal tied in front of the bulb.

"Stanley, is that the size altering stone the kids had?" Stanford asked his brother.

"Yep, Mabel gave it to me for a little reminder. As if I can forget her ….. ignoring that flashback." Stanley and Ford walked further until they've spotted Mermando and his Manatee wife looking at a build board.

"I am not attracted to those Squid Siblings." Mermando answered his wife.

"Yeesh, It's the couple that will one day fill this world with sins against nature."

Stanford told his brother to keep it down and spoke with the couple. "Greetings Mermando and …. Mrs. Mermando." Feeling awkward for not remembering her name (if mentioned) he turned to the poster of the singing squids. "Well look at that ….. Wait ….. Well I know two cousins that will love to sue these guys."

"That better not include me, unless I'm the one suing." Stanley said as he walked up to them. "Hey, you heard anything about that king?"

"Actually we indeed have." Mermando smiled. "We've spoken with the guards and they will be picking us up to bring us the centerpiece of Atlantis 2.0, the castle!"

Just then a boat came by being rowed by a large crab.

"Speak of the Diablo."

The twins hopped in and enjoyed the quiet ride as Mermando and Manatee Wife followed by. After enjoying the views of the skyscrapers, roadways, and merpeople swimming by, they eventually reached the outer castle gates. After two guards opened it, they were treated to the majestic view of the castle ….. that looks like a giant version of the ones you get at a pet store.

"They're more desperate for my skill than I thought."

The boat stopped in front of the castle with no visible entrance, where they were greeted by the captain. "Hello, explorers from the surface. Have you enjoyed your night?"

"Sleep, no. Free food, yes."

"Good." The captain ordered a few mermen to bring out wetsuits. "These will keep you dry underwater, and the best part…." He pointed at the side of the glass helmet. "Artificial gills."

"Ha, they beat ya too it!" Stanley elbowed Ford.

They put the suits on and jumped right into the water. The captain pointed downwards and they all followed him underwater to an underwater drawbridge.

"What's the point of having that underwater?" Stanley's question was left unanswered as the drawbridge was lowered and they all entered inside.

Opposing from what the outside looks, the inside of the castle was vastly majestic with gemstone walls, marble flooring with designs of multiple sea creatures, and a ceiling with artwork depicting of what looks like their history which includes the construction of the first Atlantis, it's destruction, havoc waves and storms, merpeople making an offering to a large animal, merpeople befriending dolphins, merpeople realizing how awful dolphins can be, black Friday, and the construction of Atlantis 2.0, and Black Friday again.

Stanford, Mermando, and Manatee Wife all gazed at the marvels this castle held, and Stanley was estimating how much everything is worth, and maybe nabbed a few pearls laying around, but that's just a hunch.

"Does this thing have pockets?"

They eventually reached two large doors with markings depicting royalty.

"Behind these doors is where the king of Atlantis resides, King Quadent."

"Enough with the reference, I get it." Stanley randomly said. "….. Eeesh, there goes that Twilight Zone-six sense thingy again. Darn it, I did it again!"

Manatee wife whistled a familiar tone.

"Yep. You, did it again ….. STOP THAT!"

On the captain's orders, two guards slowly opened the doors as a bright light was shunned on them.

"My eyes, again!"

The light slowly died down and revealed an amazing throne room …. Without the king.

"W-Where is he?" the captain asked.

"I'm behind you guys."

Everyone turned to see a withered old merman with a large plain looking crown covering his eyes, a trident with four spikes instead of three, and a long white beard that is ridiculously long. The group just followed the old beard leading out a door and a several crabs picking at it.

"So, you must be those land guys." A guard whispered to King Quadent. "Humans, that's it." He swam over to two people. "But why do you have a tailfin and look like a manatee."

"Over there." Mermando pointed to the Stans.

"I see …. You must be clone humans."

"No wonder the dry area's sapped out of cash." Stanley whispered to Stanford.

Stanford swam ahead of his brother and bowed. "Your majesty, it is an honor to meet you. I am Stanford Pines. A researcher in the paranormal that came from a land called Gravity Falls."

"Gravity Falls you say?" King Quadent asked. "Tell me more."

Stanley sighed as Stanford spoke in a high manor. "Sheesh, I think I'm gonna get sick from listening to these two stuck-ups."

"I know, right?"

"Yeah, at least you agree with me, random voice from nowhere."

"Ahem….."

Stanley turned around to see the shadow silhouette of a beautiful skinny mermaid. "You must be a brave explorer, are you?"

"If you're hitting on me, you better be in your sixties."

Then the lights turned on and showed the mermaid to be an old mermaid about Stan's age. Stan's mouth slowly opened in awe as he gazed upon the mermaid's eyes surrounded by wrinkles, her red-fading hair, her chubby finger waving at him, and some sort of parasite on her tailfin.

"Hubba hubba." Stanley smiled and swam right over. "The name's Stanley Pines. Once business owner in the middle of the woods, now a true adventurer with my bro by my side. Who might you be?" he held her hand and kissed it, well he just tapped it with his helmet.

"I am the princess of Atlantis 2.0. Princess Oxygenial."

"Princess Oxygen-ial. What a beautiful name for such a beautiful fish lady."

"My, what charm. Do all human males have such charisma?"

"None as unique as mine." Stanley smiled. " _Why am I feeling deja vu?_ "

As they were talking, a crab swum up to Mermando and Manatee Wife. "Hello. My name is Sab. I will be talking to you about why you were summoned here. Also I hate music."

" _I did not expect him, yet I feel disappointed_." Mermando thought to himself. "As you wish, but wouldn't the King want to join us? He is the King after all."

"Sorry, looks like he has something else in mind." The crab looked over at the King and Stanford exchanging information while Stanley and Oxygenial flirted with one another. "Come, this way." The crab led Mermando and Manatee Wife away as the others continued to mingle.

"Aaah, the land sounds so wonderful." King Quadent said in amazement. "Why not join us in a stroll around the city? We will even bring you to the ruins of the original Atlantis."

Stanford grinned widely.

"And we can visit all the romantic spots." Oxygenial smiled softly at Stanley.

Stanford bowed yet again. "It will be an honor to-"

"We're in!" Stanley shouted. "Now let's see the town!"

"Splendid!" King Quadent said. "Now onwards!" King Quadent swam ahead, but the Stans just stood there and watched the beard follow by. They watched, and watched, and watched, and watched.

"I think I saw a kid stuck in there."

And so the four enjoyed a wonderful time as a song played over a montage of them just hanging out and learning about Atlantis 2.0.

They swam around the underwater shops as Stanford and King Quadent spoke about all the businesses in their worlds as Stanley 'borrowed' a seashell gift for Oxygenial.

In a park, King Quadent spoke with Stanford about their aquatic plant life as Stanley and Oxygenial drove off in a runaway seahorse carriage.

At a farm, Stanford was observing farmers raising kelps and multiple species of sea animals used for food (not endangered or intelligent, relax …. And also not cute) while Stanley snuck into a pin and wrestled a miniature-mystical sea pig as Oxygenial cheered on.

At an opera house, King Quadent and Stanford listened peacefully while Stanley and Oxygenial snored loudly.

At an ancient bubble fountain with statues of historical merman carved on it, King Quadent and Stanford discussed the history of their two worlds while Stanley and Oxygenial vandalized one of the statues and framed it on a person at random.

Finally, as the sun was setting, maybe? The group of four left the city limits and swam into some old ruins scattered around a mountain.

"And here lay what's left of the original Atlantis." King Quadent said as they all gazed at the wrecked building with some bones scattered around and few bottom dwellers moving around. "Have you heard of what became of this once proud city?"

"Only that it was destroyed long ago." Stanford answered. "What happened here?"

The king sighed deeply. "What caused this destruction was not very clear for our eyes and minds, and most of our history was lost." He looked over at Stan and smiled. "But do not worry; we have archeologists working around these parts."

Stanford noticed a few digging around.

"I would love to learn what they have uncovered. Perhaps it will help me find what I was looking for."

"And what might that be, youngster?" asked the King.

"Oh right, I haven't told you yet." Stanford spoke with the King about the strange phenomena happening around these waters as Stanley and Oxygenial swam somewhere private.

"Stanley, this day have been the best time of my boring life." Oxygenial said. "You see, as princess I am always feeling trapped in the castle. Someday I want to go up to the surface and-"

"HOLY MOLY LOOK AT THE SIZE OF THAT ROCK!" Stanley swam right up to a large flatten blue gem nearly twice his size. "You're coming with me!"

Oxygenial looked at Stanley hording off what her people considered 'common rocks'. "Stanley?"

"You say something cliché, I mean Oxygenial?" Stanley turned over to the mermaid princess.

"There's something I want to ask you." She held her arms behind her back. "You see, I-"

"Mr. Pines!" Then Mermando appeared and swam up to him. "Mabel's Great Uncle, I have learned some great news. Apparently the Squid Siblings are going to rehearse for their-"

"Not now, kid. I think we're getting somewhere." Stanley grinned widely as Oxygenial gave Mermando an odd look.

"Mr. Pines, I think you should really hear this great news!" Mermando swam up in front of Stan, blocking him from Oxygenial.

Stanley just rubbed his face in annoyance. "I don't know what's the deal with you, but right now I'm about to be asked something by this beaaaaaaa-" Stanley then noticed the horrified panic look on Mermando as he direct his eyes repeatedly away.

"Aaaaaaaa Oh I get it! You want advice to get together with my Grand Niece!" Stanley gave him a fake wink.

Mermando blushed. "What, but Pines. I am sadly-"

Stanley wrapped his arm around Mermando. "Don't worry, I trust you enough, so I'll hear you out, kid." Stanley smiled at Oxygenial. "I'll be right back. Sweet cheeks!"

"Oh yooooou!" Oxygenial giggled as the two swam way behind a boulder out of her earshot.

"O.K., kid. Your face just reminded me of that one time I got myself trapped by this spider lady, what the heck is up now?!"

Mermando took a quick peek at the princess waiting patiently. "Mr. Pines, you and your intelligent brother are in terrible danger!"

"It's all about that 'Saving the Ocean' stuff, isn't it?"

"Well that's still a big point, but-"

"Look, I've been going green my entire life. Mostly because I'll be saving green."

"Mr. Pines, they're going to feed you to a monster."

"…. I swear it better not be a nuclear dinosaur."

 **End of Chapter**

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	27. Beast of All Oceans

**I've been away for a week-long cross-country vacation and I've read over Journal 3 and Dipper and Mabel and the Curse of the Time Pirate Treasure. So expect more adventures based off any information given in there.**

 **Chapter 27:** Beast of All Oceans

From behind a boulder, Stanley and Mermando slowly poked their heads out to see the princess of Atlantis 2.0, Oxygenial, waiting for Stanley to return as she files her nails.

They both duck down when she turned her head towards them.

"So let me get this straight. You're telling me that these fish people want to sacrifice me and Stanford to some monster?"

"Not just any monster, the monster of all monsters." Mermando warned Stanley.

"Hey, I told you it better not be a nuclear dinosaur!"

"I-I don't know what you're … just focus!" Mermando swam up close to Stanley. "Listen, have you ever heard of the ancient sea creature, 'Leviathan'?"

"Nope."

Taking another glance at the princess, Mermando whispered. "We only have a short time, so I'll explain quickly."

* * *

In a stormy sea, a horrifying large creature swims through the surface of the chaotic waters.

("The Leviathan is the most terrifying creature to have ever existed. Its scales are like iron, weapons are twigs against him, and his breath alone will burn your skin if his flames don't do it first.")

The creature dove under a boat and caused the water to boil, making the sailors sweat from the heat before the creature raises his head from the sea and they all shrieked in pure terror.

("He has no equal and no one holds enough courage to even look at its face. All that is prideful bows to him and no mortal can kill him.")

Jaws from the beast opened up and lunged towards the boat.

* * *

"No equal you say?" Stanley pounded his fist. "You're talking to the guy that punched a dream demon, I'm sure I can handle it."

"You don't understand, Leviathan will destroy you and all of humanity unless his hunger is satisfied, which is you and your brother by the way."

"Us?" Stan gave the merboy a confused look. "They think two guys like us will fill that monster. Heck, we're not enough to feed Mr. Gleeful. Hah, get it? Cause he's fat."

"I'm just going to ignore that and drag you to your brother." Memando grabbed Stanley's wrist and tried pulling him. "Also, can you point us to your brother?"

"He's over …. With the king alone." Stanley slapped himself. "They probably have him in the pot with vegetables while he's still asking questions!"

Stanley and Mermando quietly swam away from Oxygenial who was reading a magazine. "Huh, what's up with McDonald Trumpet Creeper's language?"

Stanley gave one sorrowful glance at Oxygenial before swimming out of site. "So are you sure the princess is a part of this?"

"Oh course she is!" Mermando stated. "I've learned all of this at the meeting! ….. What's with that flat crystal?" Mermando pointed at the large flat crystal being carried by Stnaley. "It's just slowing you down."

"It's called a profit." Stanley said. "Now what about that meeting?"

With a sigh, Mermando told the events at the meeting.

(Flashback)

"How can you go through with this!?" Mermando shouted at Sab the Crab. The two were in a darken room with the only light shining on the table where Mermando, Manatee Wife, and Sab sat, and someone else.

"And who and what is that thing over there?" Mermando pointed at something hidden within the shadows waving at them.

"Ignore me." said the familiar unknown-gendered voice.

"I dunnooo. I wasn't paying attention to his slash her bio." Sab said.

"HEY!"

Sab gave no response. "Leviathan destroyed the first Atlantis because of …. Some invention called …. I dunno. I heard it was garbage, but nothing specific.

"I'll just guess actual garbage." Mermando said as Manatee wife nodded. "But you must believe me, the Elder Pines Twins are very wise and knowledgeable. One invented a machine to eliminate pollution. I'm positive showing that to the sea beast is enough to calm his wrath!"

"I'm not the king." Sab said. "So I don't make the orders. But I'll make an exception. Hey guards." Two guards swam in. "… Oh right. Almost forgot. Ahem, seize them."

"Even that thing over there?" one guard pointed at the mystery person/thing pointing to itself.

"Yeah, I don't like its face. Heh, I bet it will make ugly babies."

(End Flashback)

"Then the creature defeated the guards and Sab like a raging bull and pointed me and my wife directly here. And sorry, I do not know anything about our savior, nor how it knew that you two will be here."

"Meh, we probably won't see that thing again. I know I won't! Along with my brother, the kids, Soos, Wendy, that goat, and…Lullaby? I wanna say Lullaby."

The soon reached what looks like a trench the size of the Grand Canyon (pictures gives it no justice). They spotted some merpeople swimming along a path (with the King's beard) and Mermando motioned Stan to follow him behind some coral where Manatee Wife was looking through some binoculars.

"Wife, what is happening now?" Mermando asked as she handed the binoculars to Stan.

"I can't actually get a good look with this fishbowl on my head."

Mermando took it instead and was shocked. "Over there, at the pier! They have your brother in a cage already."

"What!" Stanley shouted. Seeing the coral stretching close enough, the trio followed the stone-like animal as they get into earshot of King Quadent with an eager Stanford in the cage.

"See, what did I tell you? Minus the stew." Stanley said as the oblivious Stanford was getting more excited.

"Yes, the source of the strange signal! So close to grasp!" With a grin on his face, Stanford turned to King Quadent. "And where's my brother again?"

"Why he's just yander there." King Quadent pointed to the bleachers too far away for Stanford to notice the poorly made pebble model of his brother waving at him, with one arm falling off.

"Great. Now to see, in a controlled and safe environment with no possibility of any trickery, what this phenomena is!"

"Yeah … no tricks." King Quadent said followed by an evil laugh that was erupted by a cough.

"They're lowering his cage now!" Mermando shouted. "Stanley Pines. We are no match against an army of merpeople. We need to make a distraction."

"And you have the perfect brains for the job, right here!" Stanley said proudly. "No Human-fish King guy is going to feed my brother to a monster. And I know just the thing to distract anyone with power!"

Stanley told the two couple to stay hidden as he does the rest.

"Hey King guy!"

King Quadent and is soldiers turned to Stanley.

"Stanley?" Stanford asked dumbfounded. "How did you get from-"

"A very controversial video was released featuring the King, and the people are commenting and sharing it like there's no tomorrow! And they are not happy!"

"Oh no!" King Quadent shouted. "I hope it's not the one with the blobfish!" He turned directly around and pointed to the city. "Tali ho!"

The soldiers just shrug and followed their King's far less important orders. As soon as they all scattered, Stanley swam up to his brother to pick the locks.

"Stanley, what are you doing!?" shouted Stanford. "They're prepared this scientific discovery with dancers dressed as skeletons, fish sacrifices, and a painting depicting a serpent about to devour a man in a cage …. Oh."

"Seriously Bro, I find it hard to believe you can easily miss the dangerously obvious."

Stanley freed Stanford and Mermando and Manatee wife swam to them. "My amigos, my wife had retrieved your boat and settled it above us. We must escape now or the Leviathan will feast on us."

"Leviathan!?" Stanford shouted in shocked. "You mean the same one told in-"

(Description removed to avoid any death caused by 'being offended')

"Yes, that one!" Mermando confirmed. "Now quickly, swim to the surface or else-"

Suddenly a spear was thrown right next to Mernmando's face. "Ay no."

They all looked to see Princess Oxygenial wielding a spear launcher device. "Stanley, where on Earth do you think you're going? I thought you wanted to spend more time with me?"

With those dull-colored eyes, Stanley felt coveted and was going to swim up to her before Stanford blocked him. "Stan, didn't you learn your lesson from that spider woman on your 'Revenge Trip'? And all those other girls when you had that short-term friendship with that rich kid who just wanted you as unpaid security?"

Stanley snapped out it and pointed at Oxygenial. "Oh no, don't you think about it. Mermando here told me all about your plan to feed us to the monster that wrecked your first city!"

Oxygenial pouted and placed her hands on her hips. "Oh really, well I know more on what happened that day thousands of years ago."

* * *

(Flashback)

The original Atlantis stood tall and proudly above the Arctic Ocean.

"And we will call this garbage!" a passed king of the first Atlantis preached to a cheering crowd as they dumped their invention in the ocean, killing off all the fish.

("Garbage have wiped out a majority of the Leviathan's food source, so as vengeance he destroyed our city and started hunting down our kind.")

A shadow of a serpent-like creature cast over the citizens of Atlantis.

"….. Did I mention we hug trees?"

With one breath of fire, the entire City of Atlantis was destroyed in a single second and all the people jumped right into the ocean.

("After that, we've quickly evolved into our half-human half-fish forms from long effort of training, and magic blue stones. But even after Atlantis was destroyed and we've invented recycling, Leviathan still wanted us destroyed.")

A group of merpeople swam away from the giant beast filled with rage.

("But then one day, a brilliant scientist created a magic shield to seal the beast into this trench to this day. But it will not last forever.)

The merpeople dropped two humans down the trench.

(In order to upkeep the seal, two humans must be sacrificed to the beast every year.)

The people passed through the shield and were swallowed up by a huge current.

(End Flashback)

* * *

"… and how did this scientist create such a shield, especially for a large creature like the Leviathan?" Stanford asked.

"And how'd you get him down there in the first place?" Stanley asked.

"My ancestors did that to become mermen?" asked Mermando.

Princess Oxygenial shrugged. "I dunno, that smart guy wasn't really the social type. But I think he mentioned something about a cyclops pyramid."

"Dang it, Bill!" Ford shouted upwards.

"Bro, he's at the opposite direction." laughed Stanley. "But anyway sweet lips, you don't have to do this!" Stanley looked directly at the unamused Oxygenial. "Just think about our lives together. You can fall for a terrible scam and lose your voice, then we can spend a few days knowing each other while you act like an alien, then some singing animals can pressure us to kiss that'll be stopped by the con artist's henchmen, then the con artist will turn hot and try to hook up with me, then all your friends can crash the party and your father will have to sign a contract to save you instead of just zapping the con artist to ashes, and then I save you and we can live happily ever after…"

.

.

.

.

"Until we have a kid and the con-artist's sister named Malachite tries taking the kid but failed, then you become your father and raise our kid into a cliché lifestyle, then she goes on an adventure after running away after you two had an fight where she meets two unmemorable comedy reliefs, get a crush on a random merboy that has nothing to do with anything yet was seen as a human earlier, get in an argument with your daughter again which leads to Malachite getting some superweapon, but this time your father actually zaps the villain and we get a happy ending."

.

.

.

.

"Then you get a flashback where your father outlaws singing because your mom died or something years ago, and some random lady will try to steal the crab's job … Actually I haven't really seen this possibility before because of pass experience of seeing these types of possibilities, So-"

"Enough!" shouted Oxygenial. "I'd never loved you or the surface! And your last two ideas are terrible. And wanna know something else?" Then Oxygenial tear her hair right off. "I'm a guy!"

"…. Well, I'll just salt and pepper myself, grab the wine, and-"

"Do not worry, we still have a chance!" Mermando screeched and a pod of dolphins arrived. "These dolphins are relatives of friends of mine. They can get you right back to your boat and you can leave these waters."

"Clever, but how about my friends!" Oxygenial called out just like Mermando and a huge alligator like creature swam up to them, intimidating the dolphins. "I must admit, I found your homeland, Gravity Falls, quite interesting. But you're not the only place on Earth rich with the paranormal!"

From the trench came forth more bizarre creatures, by comparison from the other freaky fish already down there.

"Amazing, all these monsters are a mix of ancient mystical creatures, prehistoric animals, and fascinating new creatures never seen by-"

"Can it already and hop on!" Stanley dragged his brother to a dolphin and the pod swam up, only to be blocked by a giant squid, and judging by that vengeful black eye, it was the same squid the twins had fought the other night.

"It's all over for all of you!" laughed Oxygenial. "All over for-"

"Skreeeeeeeeeongk!"

"Us…."

The creatures' eyes bulged out and in under a second they all swam off.

"Stay my friends." Mermando calmed the horrified dolphins. We can get out of this. I swear it!" Then far out into a trench, a towering tail rose from the dark depths. "As soon as we get out this very second!"

"And my gem here!" shouted Stanley.

The dolphins wasted no time and took the group towards the surface.

"Hey, where did you think you're all going?!" shouted Oxygenial. "I am royalty in these waters. You all obey me, see how proudly I'm acting? It's because I'm the most important thing here and there is no chance of me dying right in this spot by anyone better than me!"

Then he was sucked right up like a fish eating a mosquito larvae.

"Skreeeeeeongk!" Then a massive head rose up from the trench and looked up at the fleeting group with its red snake eyes. Its jaws opened up and hot gas bubbles escaped from its inferno mouth.

"How much longer?!" shouted Stanley as he glanced back at the creature only partially visible from the dark ocean floor.

Stanford also looked down, seeing no clear characteristics from the beast besides its mouth. "Leviathan, the greatest sea monster ever told my man. It's right below us and yet I cannot even see one part of it. Such a missed opportunity for science, but yet a great opportunity to escape with our lives."

Manatee wife looked at the creature slowly swimming up and alerted everyone.

"I know this kind of movement." Stanford said. "A few creatures I've came in contact with could easily catch up with me, but they usually like a longer and more fun hunt."

"So our possibility of surviving this is slim?" asked Stanley.

"Correct, but we can still make it out if we're three steps ahead … and I think I have the perfect idea!" Standford grinned. "Stanley, do you still have that shrink ray?"

"Got it right in my pocket!" Stanley also grinned, getting what idea Stanford has. "After we shrink this guy, I'm putting it up on display, no backtalk!"

"Won't be that simple, brother." Stanford said as they reach the boat.

Mermando warned the dolphins to flee as the brothers jumped on board and removed their swim wear.

"I've seen the kids used that stone to shrink huge objects they're grown, but they're still pebbles compared to this monstrosity!" Stanford took out a Fog Light. "With this, I can increase the length wave of the energy emitted by the crystal despite the small fragment we have. I just need to connect this with the only fog light we have here. It anything happens to it, we're doomed."

Then a spear was thrown through it.

"Ha, got ya!" The four looked to see King Quadent, Sab the Crab, and their guards. "You'll never get away! Leviathan will eat you because humans are his favorite! … Is it getting hot in here is it just me."

Then the four heroes gasped in shock as the Leviathan perch from the ocean and swallowed the king and his followers whole.

Their jaws just hung downwards as the Leviathan tilted away to land back into the ocean. "Stanley, turn this ship, now!" Stanley followed his brother's orders and moved the ship away from the large waves created from the Leviathan.

Mermando and Manatee Wife rose from the water to see the ship still in one piece. "Pines Twins, you must run! There is no way you can fight him now!"

"But we can't run." Stanford said.

"Sorry, I mean sail away."

"That's not what I meant, look." Stanford pointed ahead to see the Leviathan's head rising up from the ocean.

Stanley quickly took pictures. "If we die, sell these pictures to the public and give the money to the kids and Soos. Tell your customers it's the Loch Ness Monster."

"But that looks nothing like a giant catfish." Mermando pointed out as the Leviathan dove back into the water and began swimming slowly towards them with a huge fin sticking out.

Seeing that this could be the end, Mermando took a deep breath and turned to Manatee Wife. "Look, I know this was an arranged marriage to prevent a Civil War and we're both still kids with our lives ahead of us, but ….. I still respect you."

Manatee whistled something.

"Really? You were in love with another and this marriage stripped you away from him?! What a horrible experience. I guess we're not as different at all" Mermando rubbed the back of his neck. "I've told you about Mabel and how a long distance relation didn't work with us, but sometimes I still think about her."

"If we weren't about to get eaten, I would ask you what kind of thoughts you have which may end with a beating." Stanley said as the Leviathan swam up closer. "Actually, also sell this to buy Mabel a robot guard." Stanley picked up the flat crystal. "And mind summoning me from the dead also? I want to personally beat up any guy that dare try."

Stanford looked at the crystal and was stuck with an idea. "Stanley, give me that!" Stanely handed the gem over to his brother and he angled it at the edge of the boat where Leviathan was swimming towards. "With the structure of this crystal, I can create a beam just as large enough to shrink the Leviathan to the size of a goldfish!"

"Ha, I told you it was profitable!" Stanley said to Mermando.

With the Leviathan closing in, Stanford angled the crystal and the flashlight. "Easy now ….. easy…." Suddenly the creature dove underwater, confusing them so shortly until he rose right back up.

"Skreeeeeeeeongk!"

"NOW!" Stanford turned the flashlight on and the beam made contact with it … only for the circular crystal to start spinning like a saw and fly right off the boat.

"….. For the record, that idea was an hypothesis …. Barely a hypothesis …. I winged it, O.K.!"

They, including the Leviathan, watched the crystal fly around them before the energy engulfing the crystal started growing bigger and bigger. It made a quick U turned and headed right toward the Leviathan.

The ancient sea serpent's eyes widened as it tries to submerge, but it was too late. The crystal sliced through the neck of the Leviathan and beheaded the monster before the crystal lost all its energy and dropped right into the ocean.

The four heroes watched in aww as the head and body of the Leviathan collapsed into the ocean and just float their motionlessly.

"….Heh….. Heh …. BAH ha ha ha!" The Stan twins wrapped their arms around each other and laughed hysterically.

"That was ….. that was so close!" laughed Stanford. "We would have ended up monster food if it hasn't been for dumb luck."

"Gambling saved our lives!" Stanley laughed. "You hear that world. Nothing can stop us! Stanford and Stanley Pines will explore every inch of this world and find adventure, treasure, and actual babes instead of drag queens! Not even this giant sea snake that's reassembling itself right before our eyes will ever stop us! …. Oh come on!"

The four watched in pure terror as the carcass of the beast disobey the laws of natural biology and actually started reattaching itself. The red eyes of the Leviathan opened wide and its black pupils looked directly at the ship.

"Stanford." Stanley slowly turned to his dear brother. "Is jinxing real?"

"Yes Stanley, yes it is real."

The Leviathan opened its mouth and began charging its fire breath, before stopping it when it spots a huge pile of trash floating by. "Skreeeeeeeongk!" It hissed loudly at the pile of trash in anger, but then witnessed the waste miraculously disappearing by a laser. Leviathan looked back at the boat to see Stanford holding the ray gun.

"Please tell me you respect us now."

It was difficult to tell what the Leviathan was thinking. Any change in its face was unseen by the black night of the sky. Its red glowing eyes however looked very closely at the ship and noticed Mermando.

"Skreeee?" it called out. "Skreeeongk? Skreongk."

"He's talking to you." Stanley whispered to Mermando.

"Uh right. Hope he speaks dolphin." Mermando called out in his dolphin language.

Leviathan's pupil grew a bit and actually started calling like a dolphin.

"All fear and anxiety from this thing is dead to me now." Stanley said out loud, which was heard and understood by Leviathan. All the beast had to do was light up multiple bio-illuminant spots on its body to show the four his nightmarish form.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!" They all hugged each other in pure terror. "O.K. O.K.! You're the Bringer of Death! Godfather of the Ocean! …. The Nuck Chorris of ….. whatever else is on the internet!"

Looking satisfied by their fear, the Leviathan powered down and lowered itself to the boat to speak with Mermando some more.

The Stan twins just watched the biblical monster and the pre-teen merman talk to one another as Stanford jotted down a quick sketch.

"Please tell me you're not drawing that thing."

"I have to Stanley, for science. And yes I will put up warning labels." Stanford shivered. "Nothing in the Nightmare Realm had ever come close to looking as horrifying as this …. Fish snake demon!"

They continued to watch as the Leviathan was giving some gestures about a question he asked. Mermando pointed somewhere in the west and the beast's eyes widened as he asked the Twins something.

"Uhhhhh."

"He is asking if anything strange have happened over at Gravity Falls."

"Gravity Falls?" The twins asked, surprised by his question.

"He's not familiar with the name, but knows about the paranormal activities around that area." Mermando said. "Also from your remark, he seems to understand English. I recommend answering him without being a jerk. It will most likely save our lives."

Stanford gulped before confronting the beast. "M-My name is Stanford Pines. A scientist of the paranormal from the area now called Gravity Falls. Near the end of summer over at the West side of this world, a dream Demon named Bill Cipher had-"

Suddenly the eyes of the Leviathan shrunk and the beast roared into the air, a roar of fear.

"B-But he's destroyed now thanks for our quick thinking and my brother Stanley here!"

Leviathan calmed himself and looked directly at the other twin. Stanley, still shaken by his true form, told the Leviathan about how they've defeated Bill Cipher and saved the world from the Nightmare Realm.

After hearing their tale, the Leviathan looked upwards and roared once more. "Skreeeeeeeongk!" It lowered itself and spoke with Mermando again in dolphin tongue

"Ah, I see … really … the Atlantians needed to sacrifice two humans a year to keep the seal…. Interesting." Mermando looked at the Stan twins. "It appears he knows about this creature called Bill Cipher. It was because of him that he was sealed up in the first place after some complicated trap involving bait and mostly because he actually lives in that huge trench. Also he said that the Atlantians accidentally skipped a few years with the sacrifices and it did nothing to the seal. Another one of Bill's tricks."

Leviathan spoke once more.

"But now that the power of Bill Cipher is gone, he is free once more."

"… Is this a good thing for the world?" Stanford asked.

Leviathan spoke in an annoyed tone.

"Well apparently he can't find love and start a family thanks to the Big Guy also known as-"

(Description removed to avoid any death caused by 'being offended')

Leviathan spoke again.

"Apparently it would love to destroy humanity enough to stop pollution, and discover why the planet feels warmer, but he is impressed at what you did with that trash."

"Yes!" Stanford cheered.

"So now he has to destroy you."

"… Oh crud."

The Leviathan screeched again.

"He was joking on that last part." Mermando said as Stanley laughed. "He'll just remain hidden from the humans, minus the ones that deserves death or are just annoying, and is very interested in seeing your invention being used."

"Why yes." Stanford spoke. "As of right now I want to keep my inventions and discoveries a secret for now, but I know a friend who can help bring this to the world."

The Leviathan screeched in a cheerful tone.

"Looks like we are safe from his wrath!" Mermando said as the others cheered. "But first we need to agree on a few things."

"Of course there's a catch." Stanley said. "Look, I'll give those photos to some random geek on the internet. No one will believe him."

Leviathan screeched some things to Mermando.

"Two things. First one, he wants you all to promise not to ask questions about him and his knowledge of Bill Cipher. Until if things are necessary to be revealed."

Stanford felt conflicted by this realization. He had met people in the other dimensions that know and fear Bill Cipher, but in this world Bill Cipher only contacted people in the distant past, and here standing before him is someone that can answer so many questions he had. However, knowing the threat caused by Bill Cipher, he agreed to the Leviathan's terms. But still felt the urge to know how he reattached himself like that.

"Second, he wants to ask what that attack was."

"Attack?" Stanley asked before remembering. "Oh, that was one of those flat crystals at the bottom of the ocean floor. My brother here wanted to use this shrink crystal from Gravity Falls to shrink you, but that happened instead."

Leviathan tilted his head, and then in a brief second, he shrunk to the size of a dolphin.

"Wow, that wasn't going to work at all!" Stanford said out loud.

Leviathan returned to his normal size and screeched.

"My amigos, you two have been given protection in the ocean by the Leviathan. Atlantis 2.0 and all the oceans' animals will give you no harm until your last breaths. Just you two, no friends or family."

Stanford felt both relieved and excited by the news, but not Stanley. "But what's an adventure without challenges?!" Stanley asked before Stanford covered his mouth.

"I give you my goodbyes, until we meet again." Mermando translated as the Leviathan lowered his head.

"And I must return home with my wife." Mermando said as Manatee swam next to him. "We may not love each other and prefer to be with other people we do have feelings for, but it's still our duty."

"Skreee?" Leviathan stopped himself and asked Mermando something.

"Oh, she's actually my arranged wife that was necessary to stop a war."

Then the Leviathan mentioned something that caused that shocked the couple in a good way. "You've outlawed arranged marriage and war in all oceans how long ago?!" The two looked at each other and smiled. "I believe you are needed at the Gulf of Mexico."

Manatee then whistled something to Mermando. "Hm, you have a good question. What was the reason we were called here."

"King Quadent just wanted to start a trade route that would most likely bankrupt you." Everyone turned to see the captain of the guards. "Hey, sorry about all that….." He looked at Leviathan and gulped. "N-Now that our King and Prince, I mean 'Princess' are gone, everyone decided to make Atlantis 2.0 a democracy ….. with actual good-hearted and smart politicians." He looked at the Stan twins. "You two are free to enter Atlantis 2.0, and with Leviathan's new law about you. You will be allowed to study our culture and the creatures that live here."

Then all of the paranormal creatures rose from the ocean, with the squid from before waving at them in a guilty way.

"And here's a chest of treasure we found." The captain ordered two soldiers to throw a chest of gold and silver on the Stan-O-War II

"Well I'm happy!" Stan rushed to the chest and rubbed his hands through the gold.

Stanford chuckled at the site and then turned towards all the creatures just waiting to be studied on. " _Amazing_." Stanford thought to himself. " _I wanted to push people away from my life, but ever since I became more opened thank to the kids and Weirdmageddon, I'm literally piled with new friends and more knowledge_."

Stanford looked at the guard. "Nameless Captain, I believe we'll be staying here for a while."

"But not too long!" shouted Stanley. "I want to be back before Thanksgiving when the Kids arrived! Also Wendy's Birthday is in October, can't miss that!"

"Stanley, I agree on Thanksgiving. But I'm sure Boyish Dan's, I mean Manly Dan's daughter can understand if we weren't able to make it."

Stanley then wrapped his arm around Stanford. "Ha, believe me. I'm sure Wendy would love as many friends there as possible."

Ford was going to protest, but noticed the stern look his twin brother was giving him. "Oh, yeah. We should probably get as much data as possible and leave soon." Stanford looked at the merpeople. "Know a good gift for a rebellious teenager that actually has a good heart and clean language?"

"Scratch that last part!" laughed Stanley.

And so a party was held to celebrate the new democracy of Atlantis 2.0. Stanley was the very light of the party as he just goes out and ride animals, break stuff, and introduced the art of gambling to the city. "Here, this will bring air breathers down here!"

Stanford on the other hand was doing the exact opposite. With a few Merpeople scientists with him, he was able to study and record the creatures of the area much quicker than he was expecting. "So Trunko actually paid people and a youtuber to keep his existence a secret, fascinating ….. what's a youtuber?"

The party lasted throughout half of the night and our heroes had a somewhat good night rest. Outside the city at 6 in the morning, Mermando and Manatee Wife yawned from waking up so early after partying. They said their goodbyes to the Stan Twins and asked them to say hi to Mabel before meeting up with Leviathan.

"I do not wish to offend you, Leviathan, but couldn't we at least slumber a few more hours?"

Leviathan answered no.

"Very well."

But before they even moved an inch, Leviathan looked towards the trench he was held in for thousands of years. He called out to Mermando and swam towards it.

Manatee wife whistled him a question.

"He said he needs to check on something."

She whistled again.

"Good idea." The two instantly fell asleep.

The Leviathan swam towards his domain. He scanned the dark abyss and noticed something shining. With a snarl of curiosity, the serpent swam towards the light, disappearing within the darkness.

 **End of Chapter**

 **Le Kl, qebv pxv eb dlq ql dl. Dl Dl Ibsfxqexk!**


	28. Super Mabel Maker

**Chapter 28:** Super Mabel Maker

"I can't believe I finally got it!" Dipper rushed into his room with a huge box. He was just overflowing with excitement as he opened the box. "It's finally time … to do Geography Homework!" Dipper took out a large book on geography and three sheets of homework.

Mabel walked in and gave a loud grunt. "Dipper, don't go back to being the just 'nose-in-your-book' guy. You became a real paranormal investigator this summer and now we have a chance to solve new mysteries here! And you could possibly date Pacifica or mystery girl. Or Candy if she's interested again."

(Back at Gravity Falls)

Candy was looking at a picture of Dipper and motioned her hands like a weight as she think deeply.

(Back at Piedmont)

Dipper smiled but shook his head no. "Sorry, Mabel. It can't all be fun and games."

"It's fun for you for some reason. Just like 'Homework the Game.'" Mabel said. "I still can't understand why we're so opposite yet we get along better than most siblings, which is still awesome though."

"That's another mystery." Dipper was about to do his homework, but Mabel pulled him away. "Mabel, what are you doing?"

She dragged her brother downstairs to the T.V. "Dipper, it's Sunday morning! We still have a whole afternoon to do homework." She handed him a game controller. "It's raining outside, so play my levels!"

"Your levels?" Dipper looked at what he was holding, a Mintendo Wee n controller. He looked at both the controller screen and the T.V. to see a game title called Plumber Brothers Builder.

"Plumber Brothers Builder? How come I'd never heard of this before ….. wait a minute! The Mintendo Wee n doesn't come out until the next few months! And this game here says it came out in 2015! It's only 2012!"

"Stop doing that 'thinking about logic' you're always doing and play!" Mabel ordered her brother.

Feeling defeated, he let out a loud sigh and started playing a stage called 'Mabel Land'.

Dipper was quite impressed on how attractive the stage looks. It is the original Plumber Brothers Moustache graphic with plenty of backgrounds to make it look like the inside of a fairy castle.

"Well, let's get goin'."

Dipper played through the alluring yet simple stage. He collected coins, defeated the walking heads called Chestnuts, and jumped over a pit, with an invisible block above it which led him to death.

"WHAT!?" Shocked from the sudden trap, he turned to his sister who was giving him a particular type of smile.

"Wah wah!"

Dipper grunted and continued the stage. He passed the first trap, but then a rock that looks like a face called a Shwomp was going to smash him. He ran forward, but Mabel deviously placed a spring there to push him back.

Dipper played again and passed the first two traps, but found himself blocked by a wall of bipedal turtles called Mallet Siblings. He checked around for a hidden block and found one, with a large circle of ghosts called Oooohs coming out. Dipper narrowly dodged them and tried looking for another hidden block. But they all contained Oooohs which caused his death.

"Wanna hint?" Mabel winked at the obvious easy-way-out path.

Dipper sighed again and asked where. Right at the beginning, Mabel pointed to an invisible block with a bean stock.

"Really, Mabel?" Dipper climbed up the stock in annoyance, but felt happy that he'll finish this stage soon, until a large Shwomp smashed him.

Mabel started rolling on the floor with laughter as Dipper just glared at her. "Mabel, may I ask you something?"

"Go… Go ahead!" Mabel said as she tries to calm herself down.

"Did you at least play this stage first?"

"NOPE!" Mabel started laughing again.

Dipper face-palmed himself. "Here, let me show you how a stage is done." After seeing all the items and what he can do with them, Dipper constructed a puzzle type stage in under an hour. After completing it on his own, he handed the controller to his sister. "Let's see who'll get the last laugh now."

Mabel grinned and started playing the game. "Dipper, you are no match against the fun machine right here. I'll solve your puzzle and I'll become the Plumber Brothers Builder …. Builder!"

Mabel played through the stage, and gotten stuck in the first few seconds. "What's with the empty Shell? Why can't I reach that star? You expect me to carry that there? …. Why do you have a Goshi under that Shwomp which is right next to the Button I needed, and I still need that Goshi!"

Dipper started laughing. "I guess I can give you a hint if you want."

"NO, I'll do it myself!" Mabel tried and failed, tried and failed, tried and failed over and over and still couldn't figure out what to do. "Aaaaargh! I got Goshi killedagain!" Mabel threw the controller on the ground and pouted as Dipper laughed. "Why did I even get this game when it fell from the sky?"

"Wait what?" Dipper quickly turned to her annoyed sister. "Fell from the sky?"

"Yep, fell right out of the sky." Mabel happily explained. "I was walking home from school with my groupie when that game landed on my head while we were in the park. I think I saw a giant bird flying by, but it got away before I could tell him. But hey, free game!"

"Mabel ….." Suddenly an 8-bit hand came out of the T.V. and dragged the twins in.

.

.

.

Dipper and Mabel are now 8-bit in the original Plumber Brothers Moustache game. "Mabel! Didn't you learn anything from Gravity Falls?!"

Mabel counted down with her fingers. "Growing up is hard but family and friends make it worth it, check. Don't trust dream demons, check. Break up with boys yourself, check. Revenge is overrated, check. Not every spoiled girl is that bad, check and could possibly make great sister in-laws."

"Mabel….." Dipper sighed with red cheeks.

"And finally, if you love something, let it go, check. …. Let it goooooo! Let it gooooooo!"

"NO!" Dipper covered his sister's mouth. "Nooooooo."

"Bwa ha ha ha!" The twins looked up to see Bomser himself riding in his Turtle Mime Vehicle. "I've captured the Princess! She is the only way you can return home!"

"Tony-o, help me!" shouted Princess Pear.

Bomser flew all the way to the end of the stage and placed Pear in a cage. Bomser laughed as he took out the key. "Bwa ha ha! They'll never save you!"

Dipper groaned. "Not again." He turned to Mabel. "Looks like we're doing this a third time. So we just have to complete this stage and beat Bomser. Simple."

"Uhhhh, Dipper." Mabel pointed up at the title where it showed the high number of death, and the creator's name. 'RubberRoss'

"This is getting too shallow." Dipper rubbed his temples. "Really can't think of anything else that's more self-centered than this."

(Meanwhile)

Stanford was telling a story to Stanley while they sat at one of Atlantis 2.0's cafes.

"Then I traveled to this cave with green eyed people who know about this dimension warping crystal, but all they said to me was 'Read me, read me. We have an awesome enemy, but not that one, the other one'. After finding no crystal there I went to this other world controlled by a giant glove and all he said to me was 'I'm losing interest, stick with your story'. And after that I traveled to these alternate universe worlds that have more crude humor, but they were all destroyed by Santa Claus."

"I don't care."

(Back to the game)

Dipper took a deep breath and stretched out his legs. "O.K., how many lives do we have?"

"One …. Two …. Three." Mabel said. "Three lives. Ha-Ha-Ha."

"Greaaaat."

The twins didn't even have to move a single inch as a Shwomp almost crushed them. "Come on!"

Mabel checked the back for any secrets, and found none. "Really?"

"Here, help me up. I think I know something." Dipper instructed Mabel to throw him up, which resulted in finding a Star Guy. "Ha! Who's Dr. Funtimes? Me, right here!" Dipper took the star and rushed through the Shwomp and several Mallet Siblings.

Mabel was far behind as she saw something up head. "Dipper, STOP!"

Dipper didn't pay much attention and lost his star powers as soon as he reached several red Larry Launchers. "Oh boy." They all shot barking creatures called Jailed Jaws and defeated Dipper

Dipper and Mabel X 2

The two returned at the start. "O.K. That was rash." Dipper admitted his fault. "But now we know what's up a heaaaaaaad ARE YOU SERIOUS!?' The level was now in Plumber Brothers World with several Jumping Punching Plants (That's all I got for Piranha Plants) that they have to spin jump to reach some falling platforms with spikes underneath them. They looked farther to see Jailed Jaws they have to spin jump on to cross a pathway with Oooohs and Flying Fire balls. And after that there was Bomser with two Bomser Jr.'s who both have Larry Launchers shooting Not-Wet Skeletons (That time I was just feeling lazy), and it looks like the goal is covered by blocks they need to blow up with something.

"I cannot do this!" Dipper shouted. "Can we pause this so we can figure this out?"

Suddenly the game paused.

"Thank you!"

Dipper took out a paper and pencil and wrote down a plan. "Well since this sort of relates to geography, sort of. We can use the physic of the game for our advantage to-"

"Dipper." Mabel interrupted him. "Why not just press, 'Exit Game'?" Mabel pointed to the option under 'Resume'."

"…. That cannot work. There's no way. It's too stupid." Dipper shook his head. "But not as stupid as this!" Dipper jumped up and pressed it and the next thing they knew they were shot right back to their world.

"That actually work!" Dipper and Mabel cheered as they heard a knocking on the screen.

"Hey, where do you think you're going?!" Bomser shouted. "Get back here and save Pear. I'm starting to realize how annoying her voice sounds."

"Tony-o, help!"

"Shut up!" Bomser started pulling his hair. "Why is this my only hobby, why?!"

Mabel quickly shut the game off and put it and the system back in the box. "This is going in the incinerator … or this can be our most awesome weapon ever!"

Mabel stared at Dipper, giving him that 'Can we keep it' look.

"Well that does sound like a good way to trap some ultimate evil. Heh, it would have been funny if we trapped Bill in it." Dipper chuckled at the thought. "Alright, we can keep it."

"YAAAAAY!" Mabel shouted. "I'm gonna feed it, take it out for walks, give it bubble baths, take it to the vet, play catch, teach it how to sing 'Let it Go'. Let it gooooooo, let it goooooo!"

"Mabel, please!"

"Not until they recognized Princess Lily as the superior princess and make another soccer/football game!"

 **End of Chapter**

 **Dxjb Lsbo, vbbbbxxxxxe!**


	29. Extreme Gideon

**Chapter 29:** Extreme Gideon

G-G-Gideoooooooooooooon!

Riding on a skateboard through the town of Gravity Falls, the 90s-styled Gideon rode with this catchy theme.

'Yo Yo, Listen up. Rollin down the sidewalk, who's the boy with a slick new choice of talk?'

Gideooooooooooooooooooooon!

'From all up in Gravity Falls, he'll take it all to the walls.'

Gideoooooooooooooooooooooon!

'He once had a honey named Mabel, but now he's looking for some maple.'

"Gideoooooo-

"O.K., just stop!"

Gideon tumbled over and dragged cross the hard cement in front of Wendy. The overly stressed teen was pinching between her eyes in agony. "Why don't they just ban rap forever? And give me back my moisturizer!" The red head swiped the moisturizer off the boy and stormed off with her friends who were all standing in front of the museum.

Gideon stood up and brushed himself off. "When I was my widdle ol' self, at least I had RESPECT FROM THIS BACKWORDS TOWN!" Gideon shook off that though. "Remember now, you're a regular kid now. No henchmen to some all-powerful dream demon."

Gideon shivered from the flashback of his punishment.

"But besides Stanford, I mean Stanley Pines, there was one other person who didn't love me like the rest of the townfolks."

"Righteous?"

"Years ago, when I was just a widdle ol' babe."

(Flashback ten years, huh, thought he was 8 years old)

"Well aren't you just the most adorable baby in the whole wide world!" Mr. Gleeful and his wife were strolling along with the town with their newborn son lying in a stroller. "I bet that one day, everyone is going to love your widdle face like that red head girl being teased for liking a boy."

He pointed over a 5 year old Wendy being teased by a 5 year old Tambry, until Toby came by and the two started teasing him instead.

"That girl in the window was right."

The Gleeful family joyfully laughed. "And with my new sale in celebration of your birth, you'll get to meet all the …. What in tarnation!?"

The family stopped to see that someone had vandalized Mr. Gleeful new board, depicting the newborn as a demon, and a note saying 'RV Waz here'

"Who could have done this!? WHOOOOOO!?" Mr. Gleeful shouted up into the heavens.

"Me, Young Robbie!"

(Back to the Present … I don't think I ever watched the first 'Back to the Future' movie. Let's see, they tested out the car, the Doc mentioned something about being followed … I'm doing too much references, am I?)

Gideon growled in anger as he kicked a can, only to hit a pole and ricochet right to his face. "Ow!"

"Bro?"

Gideon's face turned red with rage and he stomped on the can. "HOW CAN I BE A REGULAR KID WHEN THE WORLD HATES ME!?"

"Chill sesh.

"AND WHO THE HECK ARE …. ARE …." Gideon's jaw just dropped when he looked at the most ridiculous think in his life. Bigfoot, dressed in a white shirt with khacki shorts with a turned cap with sunglasses. On his arm that showed a tribal band tattoo, the yeti gulped down a can of Pitt and threw it into a garbage can, which somehow caused a bell to go off and someone to shout 'Point'!"

"Righteous! Chill sesh! Bro!"

Gideon glanced around, and unfortunately the beast was talking to him. "Y-Y-Yes?"

"Bro!"

"… My name's Gideon."

"Chill sesh."

"…. I'm having a rough time being a Regular Kid."

"Righteous."

"Can't you say anything else?!"

"Bro!"

Gideon growled as he turned and slapped his face. "O.K., what does this day have in store with widdle ol' me?" He turned back and pointed at the bigfoot. "Are you going to be some guide to me?"

"Righteous!" the monster nodded his head yes.

Gideon brightened up to this idea. "Well you are well suited as the kind of person I want to be." Gideon turned and rubbed his hands evilly. "Yeesssssss. I will gain this beast's skills and soon everyone will love me again. And this time, it will not be anything evil related. Bwa ha ha ha ha ha!"

(Moments later)

"Or he just wants to eat my adorable face and take my stuff!" Gideon shouted while he was tied upside down in a cave belonging to the beast known as the Abominable Bro-Man.

The Bro-Man was standing close by as he stirs a steaming pot of stew. He turned a few pages in a cook book and counted some ingredients.

"Bro. Righteous. Chill sesh. Chill sesh. Bro. Bro. Bro. Bro."

"Your language makes no sense!"

The Abominable Bro-Man noticed that he's missing some Righteous. So he told Gideon to 'Bro', put a jacket on and walked out of his cave.

Seeing that this was his chance, Gideon dug threw his hair and took out a pocket knife. "I still haven't lost my touch." Gideon cut the rob holding his ankles and landed feet first on the floor, O.K. face first. He stood right up and rubbed his nose.

Acting quickly, the boy rolled over behind a sofa and into a pile of empty soda cans. "Eeeeyuk! Bottom feeder!" Gideon poked his head out from the pile and noticed the cave entrance close by. Looking at a lamp with a tilted shade and a table with magazines, he dashed right out of the cave and into the daylight.

"Free, free!" Gideon cheered, until he'd noticed that he was in the forest of Gravity Falls.

The boy leaped into a shrub and scanned his surroundings. "The woods. Filled with the world's most strange looking creatures on Earth." He ducked down and pondered to himself. "If I had Journal 2 with me, and the others, I could easily overcome these monsters."

Gideon thought back about Journal 2. "The book that opened my eyes ….. but now is not the time to think of the failed past." He leaped out of the shrub with determination. "I may not have learned any 'Regular Kid' skills yet, but with my knowledge of the paranormal, I will find my way home!"

(Much later)

"Now if only I went on a camping trip at least once in my life!"

Gideon was sitting in a puddle with his clothes turn a bit, dirt on this face, and his hair starting to get slightly messy. He dug through his hair and sigh harshly after finding no hairspray.

"Grrrrrrr! What did I do to deserve this treatment!? Answer me, you octopus eagle thing … waaaaaaaaaaaah?" Gideon just stared at some eagle/octopus hybrid flying away. "… What is wrong with this place?"

Gideon walked ahead, pondering about his home. "This here place holds the oddest thing beyond imagination, literally." Gideon noticed a platypus with flannel fur. "But why, why are there so many weird freaks?!"

Gideon pondered that thought for a long time. "Stanford Pines must have some ideas. Also Dipper who had Journal 3 this entire time, and Journal 1. I know he had it somewhere!" Gideon took a deep breath. "But alas, those journals are out of my reach. If only I had documents of my own … yessss ….. that's it!"

Gideon giggled fiendishly. "I'll write my own journal. I will learn about this land and perhaps exceed the old man! Yes, and my oh my! Won't my darling Mabel be impressed? I could even buy her better internet service!"

(Day dream)

The buffy and smart Gideon was flexing his unnatural muscles to a coveted Mabel.

"Oh Gideon. Your hair is quite amazing, but not as amazing as your hair. Marry me and destroy your enemies!"

"Oh yes, I will marry you my darling. Now come here!"

"Why don't mind if I do." said a male voice.

(End Day dream)

Gideon's dream cloud evaporated when he sees Jeff the Gnome using some mouth spray.

"No, not you. Get!" Gideon threw the Gnome over some shrubs, but quickly realized something. "Wait, let me study you!" Gideon chased after the gnome, but stumbled onto something extraordinary. "Oh my word!"

With a beam from the sun enlightening it, there sticking out of the ground stood several large crystals. Gideon watched in aww as a bird flew up into one of the sunlight the crystal was reflecting and it grew humongous.

"So this is where Dipper got that gem from." Gideon rubbed his hands with excitement. "Already I'm discovering new things, and no one will stand in my way to become an average kid! Then, finally then, Mabel will go out with widdle ol' me again!"

"Ahem!"

Two loud thumps shook the ground as a giant Jeff stepped from behind the crystals. "You're no girl! You're just some boy that dress and act like a girl."

"Hay, my clothes are the latest fashion!"

Another thud came from Jeff's foot. "But now that I'm huge, I can storm through town and have a better chance at finding a Gnome Queen!" Jeff chuckled as he walked away.

"The town?" Gideon quickly stood up. "He'll wreck that place with his army of Gnomes … hm, is this what caring about other people feel like?" Gideon looked at his hands in deep thought. "Huh … I think it's overrated. But that's beside the point!" Gideon put his foot on a rock to look heroically as he stares at the giant short man knocking down trees. "If that low level town is demolished, then Mabel won't come next summer!"

Gideon dashed after the behemoth man, but stopped himself and made an interesting calculation. "What am I doing, he'll just step on my like a tinny widdle bug …. Unless he was the bug." Gideon devilishly smiled when he turned his attention towards the size-changing crystal. "Yes!" Gideon ran into a beam. "Make me giant!"

And the magical properties changed Gideon's size! Into that of an ant.

"Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!" Gideon ran around, unleashing his rage on some innocent plants, pebbles, and dirt.

After calming down, he saw the ray he was looking for that just turned a fly huge. And so he dashed his way towards the light, which by his size will take about several days. "I'm gonna die out here, am I?"

The ground started to rumble again and Gideon was having a difficult time standing up. "What in tarn nation!?" Gideon looked up to see that Jeff had returned, with his Gnome followers gnawing at his face.

"Guys, it's me! Your leader!"

"Shmebulock!"

"I know I'm a giant, but look at me! Would anyone else would care as little about your lives like me?"

The Gnomes ignored him and climbed towards his eyes, which caused Jeff to push a crystal down and the beam from it reached Gideon and returned him to his normal size.

"Yes, I'm back to-" Then another beam touched him and he turned to the size of his robotic self. "Normal ….. Drats! Now if I go into town, I'll just step on everyone and ….. step on them all."

Temptation was dragging Gideon back to the life he laid down some time ago. "They'll treat me with the respect I deserve ….. or be destroyed!" He grinned widely as he clenched his hands. "They'll just be vermin under my thumbs. And Mabel would-"

Then a beam shrank him back to normal.

"….Woah. Almost lost myself back there. Feyew. For a second there, I thought I …. I… I'm just floatin in thin air, aren't I?"

Gideon looked down to at the ground several feet away and instantly fell down. "AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!"

But right in the nick of time, someone saved him from becoming a splat on the ground that dogs would lick up and throw right back up.

"Oh my gosh, you saved me you …. Oh not you again." Gideon folded his arm in annoyance when he saw the Abominable Bro-Man holding him.

"Bro."

"Oh just eat me already so I don't have to listen to you!"

The Bro-Man just shrugged and stuck his tongue out.

"Ew Ew! Kill me first at least! Boy does that sound dark."

The Bro-Man's tongue touched the boy's head, however by the shrunken look if his eyes, the Bro-Man found him disgusting and dropped him.

Surprised by this, Gideon stood up and saw the Bro-Man walking away as he rubbed his tongue. "Ha, looks like stolen moisturizer saved the day. You hear that paranormal, Gideon shall study and rule you all!"

Several haunting roars followed soon after and Gideon quietly walked away in a pace.

Some hours later, Gideon managed to crawl himself back to civilization. "Yes …. I did it!" Gideon raised his fists into the air. "I liiiiiiiiiiiiiive!"

Gideon jumped for joy as he ran up to several random people. "I made it back! I made it back! I made it back to this Rat town!"

Gideon noticed Wendy slowly walking by with her head lowered and her hair covering her face. "Wendy. I have conquered that Outdated Yeti, the Octopus bird, and the Giant Gnome! I am now-"

"Would you just ….. SHUT UP!" Wendy's harsh voice was followed by her horrified glare she gave the boy. Gideon fell back and noticed the pain-driven look in her eyes as she rubbed your temples.

"Just LEAVE! LEAVE ME ALONE NOW!"

Hearing her blood-curdling cry, Gideon crawled away in a panic and hid behind a trash pin to watch Wendy slowly walk ahead as her teenaged friends reach up to her.

"What the devil…." Gideon paid close attention as Nate and Lee both held her up by her arms and they walked her home. Never in his life did he witness something as terrifying as her. Weirdmageddon was still on the top if his list thou; but just the very look in that redhead's eyes, it was something else.

"What happened to that girl today?"

That time during Weirdmageddon, where both Dipper and Wendy entered his turf; that was truly the first time they were properly introduced. Never in his life had he ever spoken with the cashier girl. The only thing he knew was that she was the daughter of Manly Dan, the toughest man in town. Even he made Gideon shiver a bit especially when he was still the town's favorite.

From what he heard, Wendy didn't fall far from the tree. She was a tough lumberjack girl and survived Weirdmageddon like a pro. But now there she was, needing help from two people just to walk her home.

"I …. I should stay out of that one." Gideon nervously walked away. "Probably nothing, nothing serious. Heh…. Heh … please don't let it be something Bill-related. Please let it be something else!"

 **End of Chapter**

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	30. Wind of the Blind Eye

**Chapter 30:** Wind of the Blind Eye

Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep (SMASH)

"Uhhhhhgh." After committing homicide on an alarm clock, Wendy slowly arose from her blanket. "Why can't they be smoothie, huh, soothing?"

The teen was in no way ready for the brand new day and the smiling sun outside. She slowly sat up from her bed and felt her brain in agony. "Why …." She checked her phone, Monday. Still September and yet still summer. "I am not in the mood for anything."

True to her words, she was too drained to even think straight, but the haunting thought of school and leaving her precious boyfriend behind was not the cause of her state of mind. The reason for this all started yesterday.

(Yesterday)

(Yeah, I just said that)

Inside Wendy's room, the red head picked up Dipper's cap and placed it on her head. She turned to her mirror and snapped at herself. "Lookin' good." Wendy felt like she could take on the whole world; or Weirdmageddon all over again.

Because today is the day she and her friends are actually doing a Mystery Hunt on their own.

"Too bad the twins aren't here for this." Wendy said to herself with a sigh, but wearing that hat on her head made her think of herself as a new version of Dipper. Dipper 2.0. Without the awkwardness.

"Now I have to use my brain today to solve puzzles and problems … I'm doomed." But she left her room with a smile, grabbed a quick breakfast, and walked towards the museum. She recalled the events that happened when Dipper and Mabel dragged her and Soos from work (which she was thankful for, but mostly not about work that time), drove to the dump to meet the town's looney, and uncover a secret cult they put a stop to, and discovered that McGucket had a past with the author a.k.a. Stan Two.

This day however, she and her team have been put in charge by their Adviser, Dr. Fun Times, to investigate the person of interest she had discovered, Wind of a Hurricane. This mysterious person, described by Chutzpar the Manitaur, is dressed in a trench coat and his face was covered in bandages. There wasn't anything else particular, minus the fact that he beaten up Wendy's dad with one punch and he doesn't even remember Wind except for eyeballs.

Either he punched himself enough times to forget that embarrassment, or there was still a Blind Eye Member left, and that is what she's going to do. Right after she put a stop to Gideon and getting her moisturizer back.

"What a creep." Wendy mumbled to herself as she walked towards the museum where all her friends are. "Guys!"

"Wendy!" they all cheered.

"Alright, who's ready to go on a Mystery Hunt?"

"Mystery Hunt, Mystery Hunt!"

"Yeeeeeah, dudes! Mystery Hunt!" The new Mr. Mystery himself showed up with Melody by her side.

"Soos, I mean Mr. Ramirez, you made it!" Wendy said with a smile.

Soos put two thumbs up before commenting to Melody about Wendy addressing him as Mister. "Like I'm going to miss this. I can find more stories for the Mystery Shack, plus Abuelita made Sunday cleaning day. She said she found some very dirty stuff that she'll take care of herself. Probably that dead opossum in the kitchen."

(Back at the Shack)

"I burn these magazines from Mr. Pines's room now." Abuelita said as she throws a pile of magazines in the fire place.

(Right back at the Museum)

Melody was smiley to herself. "Oooooh, this is so exciting! I get to work up close with professionals on a real Mystery Hunt, without the monsters."

"Good thing you guys cleared those hood guys out." Lee said. "Remember those ghosts at the convenient store?"

"I still remember being made from mystery meat." Nate shivered. "But good thing Dr. Fun Times bashed them all up."

"Bash them up?" Soos scratched his head. "But aren't ghosts transparent, meaning that touching them is impo-"

Wendy elbowed Soos and told him to be quiet.

"So let's get with over with." Robbie said with a sigh. "I got more important stuff to do. Like take Tambry out for lunch. Hang out with her. Take her out to Dinner."

"And doubt I can get any signals in there." Tambry sighed. "But this should be a bit fun."

" _Why didn't those two start dating in the first place_?" Wendy thought to herself. "O.K.!" Wendy straightens her hat. "Is everyone ready?"

"Don't you go forgetting about me!" McGucket, the now richest man in Gravity Falls, jumped out of nowhere. "I now remember that place, so I'll be a guide to finding Air Man!" Then McGucket's son walked up. "Also I'm bringing my son for bonding time we've missed so much because of me being a huge jerk years ago."

"That's his son?" Lee whispered to Soos.

"And don't even think about leaving us out!" Grenda said as she and Candy walked in, both wearing sweaters.

"We hardly went on any Mystery Hunts before, so don't throw us to the curb." Candy said with a smile.

Wendy placed her fists on her sides and smirked. "Well then let's get this-"

"Hey, don't forget me."

Wendy glanced over and saw Pacifica Northwest with Grenda and Candy. She could even swear they were wearing a 'BFF' sweater seat. "You? Why?"

Pacifica just glared at Wendy. "As you know, I am now reforming myself and have become friends with Grenda and Candy."

"It's true." Candy said. "Ever since her time with Dipper at the party, she's really changing."

"Dipper? Party?" Wendy raised an eyebrow. "Ooooookeeeeeey. But is this really your thing?" She gave the girl a devilish smile. "There will be cobwebs and icky spiders that will eat your fancy and overpriced clothes!"

Pacifica shivered a bit. "I'm playing soccer, but I won't just roll around in dust like that. I'm here because Mabel told me about this Blind Eye." She clenched her fist. "I swear if I find one part of my memory down there, I'm suing this place!"

" _At least this lazy rich kid has guts_." Wendy thought her herself.

Seeing that this was as big as their party is going to get, they all entered the museum and headed towards the entrance of the Blind Eye's Lair.

"Right at the center there." McGucket pointed at where all the eyes are looked in a small room and pressed the stone tablet, revealing the secret stairway behind the fireplace.

"Woooooahhhhh." All the new comers said together.

"Why didn't anyone tell me old stuff learning was cool!?" shouted Robbie.

Pacifica was the first to look down. "So they just drag people down here all the time?"

"Sure did they did." McGucket said. "See son, this is where daddy used to work."

They all walked down and entered the main chamber. "And that there chair is where we used to tie people up. And that pipe there brings all those forgotten memories into the Hall of the Forgotten."

Wendy looked at the tube and pondered. "Team, I calculate that the Hall of the Forgotten is the first place we go to."

"Actually you're using the word 'calculate' for the wrong action. Anyone else would just say 'believe' or 'I think.'"

Wendy made one quick glare at Pacifica.

"…. I mean that's good too. You're choice, not mine."

Wendy rolled her eyes. "Whatever. Let's go."

They traveled through the hallways as McGucket points out various objects and rooms.

"And that there's the secret camera room where we used to watch the town in very public location, and that's the death robot that zaps any members who tries to installs cameras in private areas, and that's the library filled with stolen library books, and that's the Our Tiny Horsey room that only Toby likes, and there's the gift shop."

Soos looked at the gift shop. "Competition I see ….."

"So many machines here." Tambry said as she looked at all of McGucket's inventions left around here. "And still no service."

"I know, right …. But wicked guitar picks!" Robbie ran into the gift shop. "Say who's running the place?"

"Nobody now!" McGucket shouted.

"….. SWEET!"

After Robbie and the teens rummaged through the gift shop, they found another room with two sofas, a T.V. with an old game console, a foosball table, a mini-fridge, and several posters.

"Huh, don't recall this room at all." McGucket rubbed his beard. "This is new."

"Awesome!" shouted Nate and Lee.

"Alright, break room!" Wendy was the first to dive in and land right on the couch. "And what is this?" Wendy leaped to the T.V. and took a good look at the game console. "A Mimendo 65! I hadn't had one since I was grounded the first time!"

"What did you do?" Thompson asked. "H-Hey, that's a 'Legend of Korda' special addition console! They're worth a lot ….. in mint condition."

Wendy checked the console out and noticed some child-sized bite marks on the controller. "Meh, I'm keeping it." Wendy looked through all the games and took each one. "'Legend of Korda: Flute of Confusing Time Lines'. 'Legend of Korda: Major-Scary Mask'. 'Super Mustache Bros. 65.' 'Flamewheels: Turbo Racing'. After taking out more games, Wendy's eyes sparkled with joy. "Super Bash Sisters! I haven't played this in years!"

Wendy threw a second controller at Soos. "Come on, man! I need this now!"

Soos folded his arm in protest. "Tsk tsk. Dipper wouldn't play games during investigations."

"…. Right." Wendy stood up. "But I'm still taking these."

Pacifica looked at the dusty console. "I'll never understand nerd things like Legend of Korda, Monstermon, and Battlecrafter or whatever it's called." Pacifica folded her arms. "Didn't take you for one. ….. no offense!" Pacifica stated after seeing another glare from the red head.

"It's O.K., I'm what you call a 'nerd' too." Candy spoke.

"Ha, nerd!" laughed Robbie, who was elbowed by Wendy. "Sorry."

"Trust me, I am not and never was the nerd of the family." Wendy tilted the Pine Tree Cap. "But anyway. Soos's right. We need to investigate … and I just found the first clue." Wendy pointed at a poster on the wall.

The poster on the wall depicted a man looking exactly like how Wind of a Hurricane was described. Dressed in a dark grey trench coat and his entire face covered in bandages. His body didn't look that muscular, but if we really did beat Manly Dan, who knows what he looks like underneath it.

"So is that him?" Melody asked while taking a picture.

"Looks like what that beef ox said." Tambry also took a picture of the poster.

"Well time to study it." Soos said as he got a closer look. "Doesn't look like a movie slash T.V. slash videogame character to me … I should read more books."

"Oooh, I just thought up our next date." Melody said. "Well since I am a woman … I'm kidding, I'm T.V. all the way. And yes, we should read books."

Nate looked at the man and noticed his white soulless eyes. "Yikes, this is probably some mummy who wants to take over the world. Think you can take him, Wendy?"

Wendy gave no response.

"Wendy?"

"Huh?" Wendy turned away from the poster. "Sorry, I was getting some weird vibes."

"Woah, really?" Nate asked as everyone else noticed.

"Maybe you met him before?" Grenda asked. "I bet it's for a rematch with your dad."

Soos took the poster down and looked around it. "No writing here, dude."

Thompson took out a black light and shined it around. "And no secret messages."

"They Thompson." Lee took out a marker. "Here, right some hidden messages on your face."

"Yes I will."

"I can't believe I'll be a teenager soon." Pacifica said with a hint of disgust.

"It won't be too bad." Candy informed her. "We'll be teenagers later this school year."

"We'll be big, sweaty, and crazy together!" Grenda said with excitement.

Wendy gave the poster another look as he tries to start up her noggin. "I think that's all I got ….. unless..." She felt her chin and smiled. "The Blind Eye-"

"Those Blind Guys probably took our memories of this guy!" Pacifica said, cutting off the now annoyed Wendy. "I bet he's some disgusting evil monster who eats people!" Pacifica spoke in disgust. "And he could have been captured and put in a smelly zoo by now if it weren't for those hood guys stealing our memories of him. I'll sue them big time for this!"

"Hey Pacifica, look-y here." Pacifica turned to Wendy and gasped loudly at the now cobweb and spider covered Wendy.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" Pacifica screamed, nearly giving herself a heart attack.

Wendy laughed herself crazy from the rich girl's reaction. "Oh … Ooooh man. That was too much!"

Pacifica took her breath and snarled at the red head. "Hey, what's was that for?!"

"Sorry, kid. That's for cutting me off."

Pacifica raised an eyebrow. "And instead of informing my rudeness, you cover yourself in spiders? How are you not scared by them?"

"Corduroy Genes." Wendy smiled as she let a spider walk around her hand. "And spiders are over hated. These things are awesome!"

"Hey." Soos spoke to Wendy and Pacifica. "Not to ruin your foreshadowing conflict for future cliché events, but everyone else went up ahead."

"What?" Wendy and Pacifica ran out of the room and see the group at the door leading to 'The Hall of the Forgotten'.

"Oh right. That place." Wendy said with a smile as the three meet up with the group.

"And this is the end out our tour, the Hall of the Forgotten." McGucket said as he waved his fingers for effect. "Behind these doors lie all the memories the Blind Eye took from the folks here in Gravity Falls, all about the weirdness living here, and embarrassing ones too!"

"I know I'm going to regret this." Pacifica said with a shiver.

McGucket opened the doors and there lies hundreds of small tubes with the names of the residences' written on them.

The group split as they searched through the tubes. "Hey, here's mine." Grenda held out a tube.

"I have three." Candy picked up three tubes.

Robbie looked at all of the tubes and sighed painfully. "We'll be here forever."

"Relax, Robbie. They're not long." Wendy informed her friend. "Here, this one's yours."

Wendy handed Robbie's memories over to McGucket and he set up a T.V. machine. "And this here is going to show you your lost memories." McGucket played the memory of Robbie talking about the block dude, Rumble.

"Hey, I …. I think I remember this." Robbie smiled, until it showed him revealing that Dipper saved him. "That was edited."

"Mine turn, mine turn!" Candy happily placed her memories in.

* * *

"Candy, what did you see?" a member asked Candy.

"I found a magic wand and almost destroyed my enemies." Candy happily said. "Here's an example." Candy took the wand out and zapped Mr. Gleeful.

"G-Give me that, kid!"

* * *

"Now I want that wand back." Candy said in a dark tone. "…. Hey, how come it didn't show the memory itself?"

McGucket scratched his head. "Let's see here …..oh wait. Forgot to switch this on." McGucket flipped a switch and the screen showed Candy trying to zap some bullies with her want.

"Here's mine." Thompson put his memories in which showed him being chased by a sheet-looking ghost through the graveyard. "Aaaah, a ghost!"

"And it's the size of Mabel!" Grenda pointed out.

"Dude, this one will take the cake." Soos inserted his memories in, which showed a 16 year old of himself in a car race against some flaming skull faced motorist. "Oh no, I was breaking one of Abuelita's rules! No racing actual cars!"

Tambry put her memories in from probably a few months ago.

* * *

"I was in the forest for some reason and I found this mailbox." Tambry told her tale while she texted. "I wrote something in and it answered back saying that I'll end up with Robbie, weird huh. And something about there being two Mr. Pines's."

* * *

"Wow, that's a shocker." Tambry said with her mood lightening up. "I called our relationship weird." She snuggled with Robbie.

And so they've spend the next few hours watching each other's memories. Some funny, some exciting, and some involving near death experiences.

"I could have stained that new dress?!" Pacifica gasped. "And my parents turned into gophers once?!"

Seeing that nearly half of the tubes were used, Robbie checked his watched. "It's getting late. Should we head back?"

"But we didn't get to see any of Wendy's memories." Soos pointed out. "By the way, where are your memories?"

Wendy looked around and raised an eyebrow. "Yeah, where are all mine?" Wendy glanced around the tubes. "I'm a daughter of a Lumberjack who goes out training for the end of the world instead of celebrating Christmas. I should have seen at least a Gnome."

"You don't celebrate Christmas?" Pacifica asked. "You didn't receive gifts or eat candy canes or watch stop-animated Christmas specials?"

"Naw, my dad said it's not in the good book and something ….. page-en? Pah-gan? I dunno?"

Robbie took out his cell phone and still didn't get any bars. "Must. Reply. Rude and all caps backslash. And. Waste. Effort."

Wendy checked around the room, and even in a few other rooms, but found no memories of hers. "Wow, I got nothing." Wendy shrugged her arms.

"That's weird." Melody said. "But what about your brothers and dad?"

Wendy's eyes widened. "I didn't find theirs either?" Wendy felt her head as he paced around. "But why? Is it that we're too tough for them? But I only noticed paranormal activities since we went to the haunted convenient store, and after that it felt normal to see something it's been common to make contact with the paranormal and …" Wendy suddenly laughed at herself. "I'm sounding like Dipper already!"

"Well what do you suggest, Dr. Funs Time Clone?" Nate asked.

With a joyful mood, Wendy gazed around the room. "I say there must be a secret room filled with more memories." She turned to McGucket and asked if there's any."

McGucket gazed around the room with a puzzled face. "None that I recall. I haven't been here for quite some time and …. Saaaaaaay, where'd that other room go?" McGucket walked over to an arch on the wall. "There should be a hallway behind this wall."

With one stone block pushed, the entire section lowered into the ground, revealing a new path hidden in darkness.

"Great detective work ….. what's Sherlock's sidekick's name?" asked Wendy as the teens shrugged.

"That will be Dr. Watson." Pacifica answered as she turned on a flashlight. "Alright, Pacifica. It's just spiders and cobwebs down there. Nothing you should be afraid of. You're a new person."

But Pacifica's effort to stay calm all shattered when she shined that light onto two things that is neither cobwebs or spiders, just two shriveled up corpses.

"AAAAAHHH!" They all screamed as Pacifica dropped her light and Thompson fainted.

"Hey, it's you young fellas." One of the corpses said.

Wendy quickly took control of her cool and recognized the voice. "Old Zombie Dude and Mrs. Zombie Dude."

The old zombie male bowed. "A pleasure to meet the champion again."

"After she pushed you off the ring." The woman laughed.

"You old coot! You distracted me!"

"I'm no coat, and I disgust you?!"

"No, I said dis-tracted!"

"Who missed track?"

The kids just eyed the old arguing couple as Pacifica whispered to Wendy.

"I dunno the deal with them? They entered a fighting tournament against me and lost because of this comedy gold right here."

The bantered lasted for a few minutes until the woman suddenly fell asleep.

"Finally." The man sighed. "What bring you down here?"

"I could be asking the same thing, zombie things!" McGucket said. "You tell us!"

"Well we would have been gone longer, but then that secret passageway closed." The old man explained. "Been stuck in there for a week, but we've kept ourselves entertained with those new VHS do-hicky.

The woman suddenly woke up. "Yep, all about that mummy."

"Mummy?" they all asked.

"I'm your mommy?"

"Con-fad it! Gloria!" shouted the old man. "Use your hearing aid!" He sighed from annoyance. "You know, we haven't really been introduced. This is my wife Gloria and I am Adolf ….. I'm over 200 years old. So I don't need no lawsuit!"

Despite their hideous look, Pacifica actually chuckled at the last part. "Poor choice of word structure."

Robbie shook his head. "Alright, I have enough! We don't have time to hang around with old folks."

"Hey!" shouted McGucket. "I have you know that I look great at 60 somethin'."

Wendy rolled her eyes and asked the zombie couple about the mummy.

"All you need to know is down there." Adolf pointed down to the hall. "Here I'll show you. I think I left something there anyway." He said while he patted himself. "I should really wear clothes."

At that moment the group just looked down without a second thought and regretted it immediately.

"Put these robes on, NOW!" Wendy shouted as she tossed two spare robs hanging on the wall.

The Zombie couple guided them through the hallway, while enjoying their new soft hoods. "Here we are."

The group looked around the secret room in shock. Around the walls hung more memories of the townfolks, but that was nothing compared to all the shrines and images depicting the Wind of a Hurricane. Only it didn't look like Deity Worship, instead everything in that room, depicted Wind of a Hurricane, as a super hero.

"Sweet! Look at all these posters, toys, and merchandise that has no better or worst quality than normal products." Soos said as Melody grabbed a handful of plushies with big friendly eyes and small tongues sticking out.

"No one will miss these, right?"

Wendy and the others felt dumbfounded. Robbie even pointed out newspaper articles showing the Wind of a Hurricane saving the day like getting a kitten out of a tree, stopping a car accident, and him tossing a few coins in a charity bucket.

"Alright, do any of you remember this guy flying around and stopping super villains?" Wendy asked everyone who all just responded no.

"Well I don't." Wendy answered. "Which is a bummer because having a superhero is too awesome to forget. So that must mean that-"

"Wendy girl, look here." Candy took five memory tubes and handed them to Wendy. "Your entire family's memories."

"Woah." Wendy smiled as she looked at her father's memories. "This is it. We can find out who this Wind guy is."

"You mean that one?" the Zombie woman asked. "That's just an embarrassing moment with a raccoon and cheese."

Wendy looked oddly at the tube and tried it out on the second machine in the room. And just like what the woman said, it was just Dan getting in a fight with a raccoon who ate his cheese snack, and sadly the raccoon attacked one certain area and won the fight.

"Well that's a good reason." Wendy said. "Any other tubes with 'Manly Dan Corduroy' written on it?"

"Nope." They shook their heads no. "The only other Corduroys are those four you have there."

Wendy looked at the tubes with hers and her brothers' names on them. "Guess we didn't care that much about him." Wendy guessed. "But is that really my dad's only one? That's pretty much what those Blind Eyes would do to forget their own problems … wait wait WAIT!" Wendy suddenly shouted. "Why is that just one non-freaky memory here and taken from my Dad?!"

One by one, everyone came up with the same conclusion.

"Wendy, what if you're dad's a Blind Eye."

"Or was a Blind Eye." Wendy stated. "I don't remember him disappearing from home or work that often, and I would know if something is up with him if his secret club vanished overnight." Wendy looked back at the tubes of her family. "Maybe we could find the answer here."

"Save yours for last." The Zombie woman said. "It's my favorite."

"….Oooookay." Wendy handed the tubes to McGucket and he played each one from youngest to oldest.

The three brothers showed the same event of their past. They were walking through the woods together until they've noticed something jumping them.

"Wee he he!" It looked like a blood thirsty hill billy.

The three huddled together in fear (which made Wendy chuckle) and the Hill Billy lunged towards them, but then a single punch from another source flung the creature straight towards a builder.

The boys looked over to see their hero, the cloaked and bandage wearing mystery man, Wind of a Hurricane. Then the Blind Eye showed up and covered the three in a sack.

"That guy saved your bros' lives!" Soos said happily. "There's no way this is a bad guy, but why are all these memories about him here … Wendy?"

Wendy looked as if she was in a trance. She walked on over and used the keypad to rewind at the Wind of a Hurricane moment. She looked closer and closer into the soulless eyes of Wind of the Hurricane.

"…. Yep, I got nothing."

"Seriously?" Lee asked. "You don't remember him at all?"

"Not one bit." Wendy let the memory played to the end and with each tube it ended the same. The brothers say what they saw and get their memories zapped. Wind didn't even make an appearance there.

The redhead then looked at her own memories. Just the thought of someone forcing her down here and taking away her memories made her sick to the bone. "Well, here goes mine."

McGucket inserted Wendy's memories and the screen showed them a very odd looking scenario.

* * *

The street of Gravity Falls looks like Rumble went on a Robbie hunt again; however a horde of people were cheering for the mystery of their hunt himself, Wind of a Hurricane.

"Whimsical Wind (Robbie snickered) just saved that boy from that horse thing!" shouted a younger version of Tyler.

They all pointed and cheer for the cloak wearing mummy man holding a very familiar boy in his arm.

("Well he can't be that bad." Wendy smiled. "He did save that kid wearing a …. wait a minute ….." Wendy and everyone else took a very good look at the boy in Wind's arms. "DIPPER!?")

Wind of a Hurricane jumped off the building and delicately landed next to a pile of rubble with two horse legs sticking out. When he put Dipper down, Mabel Pines tackled him to the ground.

"OH MY GOSH DIPPER YOU ALMOST GOT YOUR HEAD BITTEN OFF!"

"Mabel, slow down. We've been through worst." Dipper calmed his frantic sister down.

* * *

Everyone watching was just so dumbfounded and shocked to see the Young Pines Twins in the memory, and they didn't look a day younger in it.

"Dipper has your hat!" Thompson pointed at the trapper hat on top of Dipper's head.

Wendy glanced at her Pine Tree cap and back to the video. "When did this happen?"

"Hold on, I think I know." Soos said. "This must be when those dudes went back in time and tried to see why I don't like my birthday. They're like the best kids forever."

"But we only swapped hats at the end of summer." Wendy said. "So they probably traveled back next year."

"Or Thanksgiving?" Soos added. "And whenever they might pop up again, like maybe inside one of my Christmas presents?"

"That's definitely something Mabel would pull." Wendy smiled at the thought. "Hope Dipper would remind her to put stab some air holes."

Robbie looked at the memory and pointed at someone running towards them. "Wendy, I think you remember this girl."

Wendy looked back and was amazed to see a 12 year old version of herself. "Woah. This must be like …. The true first time we met or something … hmm….." The gears in Wendy's head started to turn. "I think this is reminding me of something … what was it ….. something with bikes?" Wendy's thoughts were undisrupted by her past self's braces-filled mouth.

* * *

"That was amazing!" 12-year old Wendy shouted with excitement. "You just outsmarted that thing like a professional monster hunter! You're amazing!"

Dipper was taken back by that comment. With a hint of red to his face, Dipper tried to play it cool. "I know, but this is really top secret information. I think my sister and I will just walk over there and-"

But then (take a deep breath for this one), to everyone's shock, including Wendy herself, the 12-year old Wendy grabbed Dipper's face and kissed him right on the lips.

* * *

The lumberjack girls' jaw dropped as fast as the Dipper in the memory fainted. "But but but but. Did that just, I mean did it happen then?! NOW?!" Wendy was running out of words to say as her face turned completely red, but it only gotten worse when all her friends started teasing her.

"Woooah ho ho. Didn't think you two were that close." Lee laughed.

"So that's what you two were doing during your movie nights." Nate snickered.

"Yeah ….. like … like a woman dating a young guy." Thompson's attempt did give some laughs.

"You were so glad I didn't have a cellphone back then." Tambry's usual tone was starting to break.

"Ha!" laughed Robbie. "… Wait, so in a way, he already beat me long before we even dated. Dang it!"

This was a new tone of red to appear on Wendy's face. Her embarrassment and anger mixed and fought with each other as her face and hand gestures tried to pick a side. "G-Guys! SHUT UP!" with her voice cracking a bit; all she could do was listened to everyone's laughter, until a horrifying yell was heard from the memory.

* * *

With steam coming from his nostril, a rage-driven Manly Dan stood over the now conscious Dipper. "BOY! AND WENDY! YOU! KISSED! MY DAUGHTER! 12 years old! BLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

Dipper and Mabel screamed as they ran into the woods.

Manly Dan was about to give chase, but Wind of a Hurricane grabbed his wrist and Dan fell right on his face.

"Typical Dan." Wind spoke to himself with a soft voice. "To be that happy at that age? How I envy it now."

Wind released Dan as he picked himself up. "You saw what he did!"

"For your knowledge, Wendy was the one that kissed him. For some reason society accepts that" He folded his arms and shivered. "They accepted way too much things. Well at least on the internet."

Dan stood up and looked ahead.

"And that boy must be thirteen of age. I don't think you would want to hear what Mrs. Corduroy will say."

Dan folded his arms and walked away while he mumbled.

Wind walked over to Wendy and kneeled to her. "So I'll take it you're attracted to brains?"

The 12-year old Wendy folded her arms and looked away in embarrassment.

"What a juicy story you'll have with your mother, I supposed." To Wendy and Soos's shock, Wind performed several super hero like poses and drew out the Memory Erasing Gun from his coat. "But sadly I need to dispose of this beast and ….. well it wouldn't matter." He stood up and held up two peace signs. "Because none of you should have seen those twins yet!"

Seeing that weapon in Wind's hands made Wendy turn away in fear as Wind zapped the memories of each citizen, who were all very cooperative for some reason.

Wendy eventually looked to see that everyone was acting strange, but not hurt. Wind looked at Wendy and tilted his head. "As for you … sorry you have to forget your first kiss."

Wind typed in 'Several Minutes ago' and zapped the mind of Wendy.

* * *

Everyone in that room was in pure shock. Not from Wind's strength and what followed after wards, but their hearts just sank when they saw the merciless look in Dan's eyes.

"There is no cure for nightmares!" shouted Thompson.

"Why am I not dead yet?" Robbie looked at his hands and wondered to himself. "Unless I'm already a zombie …. Awesome."

Wendy was greatly relieved that her friends completely forgotten about that moment, well minus Candy and Grenda who were both making smooching noises, but now it was time to analyses that memory.

"O.K., Wind beat up a monster that was about to eat Dipper." Wendy replaced the memory and blocked the kiss seen, and I can't get a clear shot of it. Dang it, me." Wendy played over Wind's words near the end. "But why was he jealous? ….. Wait, he knew about Dipper and Mabel?" Wendy turned to her friends and made the 'mind-blown' gesture. "This is getting real deep! Like super deep!"

Thompson looked through the people in the background. "And pretty much everybody in town is there."

McGucket looked through the memories on the walls. "So each one has that moment right up here. But there's more. Hey look, son. You have three."

Wendy scratched her head. "So I'm guessing that all memories of this Wind guy is stored here.

"Most likely." Adolf said to the group. "We've watched each on. This Wind guy is a super hero in this town. He'd beaten plenty of monsters from this area." Adolf explained.

"And some blocky fighter that talks about his dead dad." Gloria said. "He made my eyes hurt."

"As if you can see." Adolf sighed. "But boy that look on the boy's face was indeed hilarious." Adolf and his wife Gloria laughed. "His mind must truly be swift, otherwise what good is he?"

The old folks could have sworn they heard several sticks snapping. Wendy was the first to look at them with dead set eyes. "What do you mean by that?"

The couple then noticed everyone else giving the two death glares.

"I don't see what the big deal is." Adolf said. "I said his mind must be swift. I didn't actually call him useless."

Wendy tightens her fists. "Oh and what if he wasn't so swift, huh? Or why not being born paralyzed, deformed, or mentally challenge? Would you just toss him to the curb if he was your kid, Mr. Adolf."

"Yes."

The quick answer the creature gave them; it was enough to completely boil each drop of blood in their bodies.

"That is soooo no cool, man!" shouted Robbie.

"You're going to get so much dislikes now." Tambry said while she still tries to get a signal.

"Even I never heard anything like that from my parents!" Pacifica pointed at him as Candy and Grenda readied their selves for combat.

"Son, get me the banjo. I feel like a rumblin'!" McGucket said to his son.

Both Adolf and Gloria looked at them all and shrugged.

"What's the problem here?" asked Gloria. "That's what you call the square of life."

"Circle, my dear." Adolf said to her. "That is how life should be. Throwing out the weak and keeping the strong. We did it, and you should all do the same."

"You're gonna have to put in a lot of air conditioners in the bad place down there before I even consider doing that bad thing." Soos said as Melody glared at the two.

"Hey A-dork." Wendy cracked her knuckles and neck. "Just for that, I think we should have a rematch you rotting corpses."

The two old couple looked at each other and softly laughed.

"Dearie, we're not rooting for corporations."

"She called us corpses! Dead bodies!" Adolf calmed himself down. "I know we look like them, but we're far from dead." The two then opened their mouths to reveal long sharp teeth. "We're just hungry!" The two hisses at the humans as they shot their long, skinny, and energetic tongues out at them like a snake smelling the air.

The teens screamed while the more prepared ones got themselves ready for their next move.

"Wait, how are we going to stop them!?" Pacifica asked Candy and Grenda in a panic.

"Punch them in the face!" Grenda shouted.

"Not a bad idea." Wendy was about to land a blow on Glora, but her fist was blocked and held tight in place.

"You forgot me speed, young lady." Adolf smiled.

"And you forgot my speed, too." Gloria ran up and grabbed Wendy's other hand.

"Hey, get off of me!" Wendy struggled to break free, but found their strength too unbearable. "You two are literally skin and bones, what are you freaks!?"

"What we are you may ask?" Adolf smiled. "You might say we're-"

"Heha-OW!" Soos and Melody tried a sneak attack, but Adolf kicked them to the ground.

"My leg aches." He sighed before continuing. "You should be more concern about what we're on a search for."

"We're looking for the Omega-"

"Quiet down, woman!" Adolf shouted to his wife. "We've been on a hunt for a long time, but I thinkin we should stop and enjoy a snack. Like say a lanky red head like you!"

Adolf moved his tongue in the air as Wendy's heart raced faster and faster as the tongue move closer.

Gloria looked at the petrified group and laughed. "Why not help your poor friend? I know she's a toughie, but everyone could use a hand sometimes."

"She's not as tough as she looks!" Adolf laughed as his tongue stopped and pointed directly at Wendy's eye. "Did I mention I have a fork tongue? Get it? Wee he he he he-"

But then something ran in like a bull and tackled Adolf, freeing Wendy from his grasp and knocked over Gloria.

"What the heck is KAAAA!" Gloria shrieked in pain as Wendy threw her hatchet right into her back.

"That's for almost getting me eaten, eye first!" Wendy shouted as the others snapped out of it when they saw someone picking Adolf up.

"DAD!?" Wendy shouted as Manly Dan started punching Adolf non-stop. "RAAAAAAAAAAH ….. wait, who am I punching again?"

Wendy felt like slapping herself out cold. "Dad, did you eat a bag of sugar again?"

"….. I did." Dan nodded. "So should I just stop or is this … WHAT THE HECK!?"

"Keep smashing!" everyone shouted. "It tried to eat Wendy!"

"….. Eat …. WENDY!?" Manly Dan yelled out again and slammed the old creature on the ground, non-stop.

"Hey, that's my-" Then with one swipe, Wendy cut Gloria's head right off!"

"Shreeeeeeee!" Gloria shouted like a banshee as her head rolled in front of everyone.

They all screamed to the top of their lungs, minus Robbie who just shouted 'Awesome'.

"My ow Wife ow!" Adolf shouted until Dan picked up a boulder and smashed the creature's head.

"I do not see this as O.K." Soos said. "More like O.T. or O.M. But not O.K. and especially not O.K.+."

Seeing the monsters dead, Dan yelled in victory, and then noticed everyone standing round.

"…. So …. Why are you all here?"

"We've found the memories with that Wind guy." Robbie quickly answered.

"Wind?" Dan tilted his head.

Wendy sighed and showed Dan the memories. Minus that kiss part.

"Dad, this is Wind of a Hurricane." Wendy said. "Remember me telling you about him, how he beat you with just one punch?" Wendy showed a clip of Wind saving Lazy Eye Susan. "Looks like after that he'd gotten a job as a super hero, but no one ever mentioned him before."

"And you forgot to mention that he suddenly left one day." Pacifica added. "No one here remembers this guy at all."

Wendy was a bit surprised the rich blonde pointed out something she missed. Why was he a superhero and where did he go? Another thought from earlier popped into her head. She took a deep breath and turned around. "Dad, do you remember-"

"I used to be a Blind Eye."

Everyone's eyes nearly bulged out.

"Wait, you! And them! So you were one of them."

"For about a week. They were getting too annoying ….. and I may have given away your old game to this place."

Wendy looked at the Mimendo 65 in her bag. "I knew I recognized those bite marks!"

Dan rubbed the back of his neck. "And I figured you'll come here, but why bring him here?" Dan pointed at McGucket.

"I started the Blind Eye and broke my mind with that gun."

Dan blinked a few times. "So that thing does make you crazy! Good think I make sure you stay away from the paranormal when you were young."

"Hold on!" Wendy gestured a time out. "You kept me away from the paranormal?"

"Yep. I always do a good job." Dan smiled. "And I threaten the Blind Eye every time they try zapping me!"

Everyone was filled with questions, but they figured Wendy should speak with him alone on this.

"So wait. When and why did you join?"

"About ten years ago, and the doc told me doing community service will calm my nerves every time some tree hugger ties themselves up on a tree."

Wendy rubbed heard head in confusion. "So do you really not know a thing about this Wind Guy?" She looked over and pointed at a tube. "I think that's your memories of him. Any flashback about him."

Dan looked at the screen Wendy pointed. "Sorry, can't say."

Wendy sighed. "O.K., this is a stressful day, I think I need to lie down before you say anything else."

"…."

Wendy sighed again. "Lay it on me."

"For the entire time, I knew about the Stanley-Stanford mix up."

"WHAT?!"

"It's pretty obvious." Manly Dan said. "I met him when I was still called 'Boyish' Dan. I lent him our family's haunted cabin and I built the Mystery Shack. Also we have a haunted mansion. I remember Stanley telling me like it was only years ago."

(Years ago)

"And now I need to find those two journals and get my brother back." Stanley explained to Dan. "So don't rat me out to the cops or government people about this. I'll bribe you in gold …. Or just snacks for the Mrs."

(Present)

"That boy I thought was a girl, Dipper, asked me about a mysterious author and the journals. Too bad Stanley didn't tell me to get him those journals. Things could have played out differently."

Wendy, was without words. She came here looking for answers about Wind of a Hurricane who was once known as Whimsical Wind, but instead she learned that her old game system was being used by some cult freaks and that her dad knew about the author and didn't tell a soul, and of course she didn't let that kiss out of her mind, nor that fact that she was about to be eaten from the eye first by some shriveled up old guy.

The build-up stress inside her was let out in a shriek and she marched right out.

"Wendy, were are you going?" Dan asked his furious daughter.

"To drown this stress!"

(Later)

After shouting at Gideon, she stumbled her way home before her friends caught her.

"There you are." Tambry said, sounding concern. "Where've you been?"

"Drowning my stress." Wendy slowly turned to them with an energy-less look. "By giving myself brain freeze from smoothies."

(Back to the present)

Wendy felt her head again. "Stupid smoothies …. It was worth it." Wendy got walked downstairs and slurped down a huge glass of water. "I'll file my report to Dr. Funs Times about what I've learned yesterday, and I am so asking for more sick days!"

Wendy sighed and looked at her phone, 7:00 a.m. With plenty of time on her hands, she took a deep breath and recalled what she actually did learn from Wind of a Hurricane.

"O.K. he used to be a super hero called Whimsical Wind ….. that is stupidly hilarious. He saved Dipper …. I hope he never brings that up in the future. Mabel would. He probably ran into the twins before and knew they were from the future. And also he's was a Blind Eye and my Dad knows nothing else."

Wendy leaned next to the window and looked at the birds flying by.

"And all of that was stored in a secret passageway with all those memories of him in there." Wendy scratched her head. "But why? I mean we really needed one during Weirdmageddon. Where did he ran off?" Wendy thought back of when he used that Memory Erasing Gun in her memories. "Maybe he erased everyone's memories of him and stored them there, including the Blind Eyes."

Wendy found this quite exciting. "And why would he do that? Alright, this is so awesome!" Wendy grinned and tightened her fists. "I mean, man! We didn't even look through all those memories. I don't even know what happened after I left! I am so Dipper 2.0 right now… I should ask Stan Two to fix that gun."

Wendy checked her watched again and sighed. "But now I have to get ready for school. Ugh."

Before she did anything else, she recalled the two old monsters. "But what were they doing there? I think the old lady said something about Omega something. Eh, doesn't matter now. They're both dead, and good thing."

.

.

.

.

Back at the hidden lair of the Blind Eye, the two bodies of the old monsters suddenly stood up right on their own.

"Woah, you wouldn't see that in the picture show." Adolf said as Gloria placed her head back on, backwards.

"Crazy coot." Adolf turned her head around and led her back out. "So I'm guessing what we're looking for isn't here. But we'll be back. We will be ….."

"But you said what we're looking for isn't in Gravity Falls."

"That's not what I mean, woman! ….. Wait, what did I meant?"

 **End of Chapter**

Tel lo texq, qeb Tfka hkltp klq


	31. What is This!

**Chapter 31:** What is this!?

Outside the museum, Wendy shortly departure after her dad revealed a ton of revelations and wanted to clear her mind, mostly from that lost memory of hers.

Manly Dan left after telling Wendy's friends to keep an eye on her and headed home. Robbie and Tambry walked with the other teens as they updated their profiles. Soos and Melody pulled a cart filled with Wind merchandise as they giggled with each other. Tate pulled his car closer so he and his father Fiddleford can load up the memory tubes of Wind and the Memory Reader and bring it over to the mansion for further investigation.

Lastly; Pacifica along with Candy and Grenda started heading home after a long day.

"I cannot believe they'd bagged people and wipe their memories just so they can forget the creepy stuff here!" Pacifica wasn't having a happy day, just like Wendy. "And they think forgetting about those monsters will keep them happy? What if they erased my family's memory of the ghost curse? Everyone turned into trees and nearly burned to ashes!"

"It's O.K. Pacifia." Candy patted Pacifica on the shoulder. "The Blind Eye is no more."

"And I like that banjo music!" Grenda said. "And Tattoo Head is getting really popular."

They looked to their left to see the once leader of the Blind Eye, Blind Ivan, now known as Toot-Toot McBumbersnazzle, was playing his banjo while being surrounded by adoring female fans.

"I can't wait to start shredding him to pieces like a bunch of wild animals." One girl sighed.

Pacifica folded her arms. "Well you do have a point." Pacifica chuckled at a thought. "You know, we'll probably see much more paranormal creatures around here. It might be fun."

Right on que, Pacifica walked into what looks like a giant pink fur ball the same size as her.

"…. I swear I'll be begging to have my mind erased after this now." Pacifica spoke in a serious tone as the three girls walked around it."

"What is it, Candy?" Grenda asked.

"Only one way to find out." Candy picked up a stick and started poking at it. "Poke poke."

The pink furball jiggled from each poke. Then, two large eyes and a small mouth appeared.

"Is this a Monstermon?" Pacifica asked.

"Oh pa-lease." Candy said. "This looks more like a Computermon. So it will most likely have a very developed character and go through serious morals that will be dumbed down for American audience like as if we're nothing but a bunch of brainless rocks that couldn't handle a simple sacrifice but nooooo you just have to have low budget voice dubbers to make some stupid puns and-"

"Woah, easy there girl. Take deep breath." Grenda patted the angered filled Candy as she listened to Grenda's instructions.

The pink furball blinked a few times before turning to Pacifica. The rich blonde raised an eyebrow as it stares directly at her.

"What?" Pacifica asked as it continued to stair. "Get a bat ready." Pacifica whispered to Grenda.

"I am so waaaaaay ahead of you." Grenda smiled and held up an anvil. "Say, what are anvils for besides smashing people?"

Pacifica glanced back at the creature. The pink thing jiggled a bit and finally did something. Hug sparkles formed in its eyes and its mouth smiled softly but yet tried to hold in a bigger one as best as it could.

Pacifica was of course freaked out by this. She stepped away, but the monster rolled in a few more inches.

"Grenda, kill it!"

Grenda slammed the anvil on the pink creature, only for the cartoon prop to bounce right off and fly far away and landed with a huge crash.

"Run for it!"

The three girls dashed away from the creature. Seconds, minutes, or hours could have passed. They didn't know how long it's been, but they've kept running until they've reached the Northwest's 'smaller' mansion, which was looking rather well after more reconstructing and some landscaping around the area.

The three girls ran through the front doors and started barging it up with multiple objects, including Mr. and Mrs. Northwest.

"Pacifica, what on Earth is going on!?" Preston shouted as he stood up from the pile. "Why are you acting like you've seen a monster … please tell me that ghost didn't come back."

Pacifica finally caught her breath and explained to her parents the creature they found.

"And then after it gave me that look, Grenda dropped an anvil on it and it just bounced right off it and flew into the air somewhere!"

"Well that explained that." Mrs. Northwest pointed at the new hole in the ceiling and the one right underneath it.

"Thankfully we were going to get a sky roof anyway." Preston said. He took a look outside and saw the creepy puppy dog eyed creature rolling towards the mansion.

"Well we Northwests always know how to eliminate unwanted people, I mean pests." Preston took out his cellphone. "Release the hounds ….. right, I had to sell them all." Preston looked next to him and noticed the family's Labrador retriever. "Sick it!" Preston pushed the dog outside and the creature rolled up next to it with its smile still planted on its face.

The dog sniffed the creature and then quickly fled right into the doggie door and hid underneath a table.

"I miss Hunter." Preston sighed. "Next plan, we shall shoot it."

"But bullets would probably bounce right off it." Grenda said.

"Right … fire." Preston pounded his fist. "We shall end the beast with fire. At least I kept flame thrower." Preston ran into the closet and came out with a flamethrower."

"How long and why was that in there?" Pacifica asked without receiving an answer as Preston kicked down the door and burned the monster to dust, well that what he'd hoped for. It did absolutely nothing to the beast and it still smiled like it's looking at the most adorable thing in the world.

"Fire failed me!?" Preston shouted and noticed a gardener with a hose. "Water, of course." Preston pushed the gardener down and shot the beast with water, and it still did nothing. In fact, it looks completely dry after that. "Curses!"

Preston dug through his pocket. "Well why not try some ….. where'd it go?!" Preston looked around the area and found no trace of that creature. The others slowly poked their heads out the door and saw no sign of it.

"What happened?" Candy asked as she and Grenda huddled up in fear.

"Pacifica." Mrs. Northwest spoke softly. "I will take your less popular friends home." Priscilla Northwest looked at her husband. "Guard our daughter. I'll be right back."

Candy and Grenda hugged and wished Pacifica luck before Priscilla led the two girls to the limo and drove off. "I can't believe I'm doing 'help' work."

"Mmmmmmmmm."

Priscilla's eyes bulged right out as he looked directly next to her to see the creature sitting right in the shotgun. "Waaaaaaaaaaah!" All three ran out of the limo and ran back to Preston and Pacifica.

"DAD!" Pacifica shouted to her father as the thing rolled closer and closer. "Are you forgetting any other curses that's about this?! Or at least something paranormal related?"

"Let's see. Lumberjack ghost, Weirdness Bonds, other lumberjacks corpses underneath that Mystery Shack."

"What?"

"Illegal elf hair trading, Pixie Dust smuggling, business scandal bailouts. No wait; that was a normal routine. … Now that you've mentioned it, our ancestor Nathanial Northwest did have statues and paintings depicting a being similar to Bill Cipher with every detail. Which explained how he got from being a 'those' digger and becoming successful."

"Are you serious!?"

The creature just kept on rolling and rolling as everyone held on together in fear.

The creature stopped itself only few feet away as it stares deeply at Pacifica and then, it ….. IIIIT…..

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!"

Everyone was caught off guard by the sudden girlish scream, mostly from the pain in their eardrums.

The creature began jumping up and down as it shrieked again at Pacifica.

"Why is it acting like Mabel?" Pacifica asked.

"Yes, it sounds as if Mabel had discovered that someone has a crush." Candy said.

Grenda smiled and shook the furball. "Mabel, is that you!?"

The creature's face turned 360 degrees and hopped off from Grenda's hands and landed in front of Pacifica. The rich girl had finally had enough of this and stomped her foot. "Alright you … you toy commercial! Tell me what you want right NOW!"

The creature grinned as it tries to hold in a squeal. After calming itself down, it spoke in a strange tongue.

"Hyhu vlqfh wkh sdvw ylvlrq, ri wkh Lfh Edj nlvvlqj wkh Slqh Wuhh, brx'yh ihow dqjhuhg dqg frqixvhg, dqg L nqrz zkb. Brx pdb idoo iru wkh Wuhh. Exw eh zduqhg, brx vkrxog ghvwurb Mhvvlfd ehiruh pkh whpsv wkh Wuhh dqg judvsv klv khduw. Brx zloo qrw olnh zkdw zloo frph."

Everyone was in silence. Just complete silence as to what they've just heard. "That makes no sense!?" shouted Pacifica with rage.

"Was that even pronounceable?" Candy asked as Grenda shrugged.

Then along came Pacifica's baby llama named Pearl and started licking the furball, which somehow started to dissolve the creature like an acid.

They just watched in pure terror as the creature screamed in agony as it says its final words.

L dp vruub, exw wklv frgh zloo qrw lqfoxgh vzhduv iurp ehlqj wruwxuhg wr ghdwk. Fhqvruv, dp L uljkw?"

Pearl the llama kept on licking until it was nothing and it happily walked away.

"… Please tell me that furball was just allergic to llamas." Preston said before falling over.

Priscilla just pushed the kids back to the limo and drove them home, without either one of them saying a word.

Pacifica, with a blank face on, walked passed her unconscious father, walked into her mansion, grabbed some dinner, passed by a possible ghost, walked up to her room, changed into her pajamas, brushed her teeth, got in her bed, took out her laptop, and sent a quick email to Mabel.

'Dear Mabel'

'I have gone on that expedition in that Blind Eye place; but after the events, some pink furball ….. I don't know how to explain this right now! It gave me google eyes and I ran back home with Candy and Grenda, nothing killed it and it shrieked just like you. Said some random words, and melted right in front of me because my llama licked it!'

'When you get your cellphones, send me Dipper's number ASAP!'

'In case you're wondering, no it is not what you think. Don't bother me right now. I need sleep and rest after what just happened! Good night!'

Pacifica sent the email, turned the laptop right off, turn her phone off as well to avoid hearing any incoming mail, turned the lights off, and prepared herself for sleep.

"I wish I was in that lumberjack girl's shoes right now."

 **End of Chapter**

* * *

 **A/N:** Man, that coding stuff is hard. I also forgot to mention I'm doing 'Three-letters forward' for this fanfiction.

I really appreciate the reviews I've received, and I wish I can respond to all of them, but I can only do that for ones with actual accounts. I feel it better to contact others privately other than posting my responses here.

And for a freebie, here's the code from the last chapter.

'Who or what. The Wind knows not.'

What does this mean, you ask? ….

Guess what, I'm looking for suggestions again! Please read the author notes from chapter 21 for information.

One thing; I already have plans for 'Soos and Melody' and 'McGucket and Tate' in future chapters.


	32. Super Wind and Pals

**Chapter 32:** Super Wind and Pals

After returning from the second expedition to the Blind Eye's old hideout, Soos and Melody took home practically all of the merchandise based off of Wind of a Hurricane, which the town folks used to know as 'Whimsical Wind'.

The couple scattered them around the floor of the living room, which Abuelita redecorated with her angel statues and old family photos, and they examined each and every one.

"These things will sell like hot cakes." Soos pulled a string from one doll and it gave a cheesy one-liner.

'Justice is like breakfast, only you need to eat it constantly.'

"Why did I get my memories erased of this guy?" Soos couldn't believe why anyone would erase memories of an awesome superhero that used to protect Gravity Falls, but of course what happened to him is still a mystery that may or may never get solved.

In the meantime, Soos and Melody have plans of their own.

"So Soos." Melody grinned widely. "Since no one remembers him, what kind of stories did you come up with?"

Soos rubbed his hands. "Oh I got this one. It's called 'Super Wind and Pals'."

* * *

' **Super Wind and Pals'**

'In the beautiful city of Stanisgreatville, it was a peaceful day where everyone was happy eating pancakes and popcorn and chips and other food laying around.

"Huzzah!"

'But then a robbery happened at the Stan Bank!'

"Oh no, my hard earn money!" Stan Pines shouted at the villainous villain of Stanisgreatville, Gideon the Kid, who had just ran off with his muscular and scary henchmen.

"Yahoo! That was a swell of a heist!" Gideon the Kid said as they drove off in their getaway car.

'But suddenly, three objects flew above their car'

"Look, up in the sky!" a woman said.

"It's a bird!"

"….. and you gave it that much effort to identify it why?" a not so in-character person asked.

"It's …"

"Suuuuuuper Wind!" Wind shouted as he fly through the air. In Soos's mind, Wind was buffed to the max with awesome laser eyeballs, a giant 'W' on his chest, and the traditional red cape flapping through the air which will have no purpose whatsoever. In fact all you have to do is wrap it around a hero's face and that just gives the villain a free shot at em.

"Justice Friends, Gideon the Kid will not escape justice this time!" Super Wind called out to his friends, Awesome Soos and Magical Melody.

'Awesome Soos is Super Wind's best friend, the luchador dressed man famous for defeating the evil NoCandy, by eating him whole.' "He was alright, I guess."

'And there was Magical Melody, a girl from a faraway town who just wanted to release stress from adult life. So a magical bunny granted her a magician costume and now she fights alongside her boyfriend Soos, I mean uh Awesome Soos, and take down the biggest badguys like Marty Mozzarella and his Pizza Dudes and the alluring Cyber Chick!'

("Soos, I still have some issues with magicians.")

("Oh, sorry. Let me fix it.")

'I mean she is dressed like a sorcerous.'

("Thanks, Soos.")

("No problem-o.")

The three heroes swoop over to the getaway car and were noticed by one of Gideon's goons.

"Gasp!" shouted the goon.

"You know, inhaling is a gasp, not saying the actual word." Gideon said before seeing the heroes chasing after them. "Gasp!" He turned to the driver and ordered him to step on it.

"Step on what?"

Gideon growled in anger and just told him to drive faster. "I will not let that goody two-shoe Super Wind get away with all this here gold I stole from Stan Pines." Gideon looked at the bag of gold he sits on. "It's either we get away, they catch us, or worse ….." Gideon and the others shivered. "Men, lose em!"

The henchmen pressed the gas and accelerated, right into a brick wall. But to keep our K+ rating (which we may lose soon if those human eating zombie couple show up again) they lived with nothing but bruises.

They climbed out of the wreck weakly, but Gideon regained his strength through his rage. "What in tarn nation was that!?"

"Sorry, Gideon. Speed limits exist for a reason."

Gideon slowly groaned as Super Wind and his Pals floated over them.

"And that is why you should always obey street laws." Wind preached.

"Yeah, dog. Like looking both ways before crossing and always hold Abuelita's hand." Awesome Soos added.

Wind then lifted up Gideon by his shirt and shook the bag of gold off him. "Now you shall be put in jail and Stan's gold shall be returned."

Gideon folded his arms and spoke once more. "Well they must have gotten dirty during that crash. You don't want to return them like that."

"Gideon's right." Awesome Soos took the back and checked the gold. "Huh, I didn't know gold looks exactly like smoke bombs."

"Awesome Soos! Look out!" Super Wind took the bag and to throw it away, but the bombs exploded and the area was covered in smoke.

"You haven't heard the last of widdle ol' me!" Gideon laughed manically as he disappeared into the smoke.

Super Wind then used his powers and blew all the smoke away; only to find that Gideon and his henchmen has gotten away with the gold.

"Curses. I have failed!" Super Wind poses over-dramatically as he dropped to the ground and covers his face with shame.

"Relax, dude. We'll get that gold back." Awesome Soos calmly said as Magical Melody patted him on the back.

"We can stake out those 'buy gold' businesses and see if Gideon will come to sell them."

Super Wind sighed. "No, I don't believe it's that simple."

"Well you can't just buy stuff with gold in this age." Magical Melody added.

"No, that's not what I meant." Wind stood up. "Gold would be valuable to common villains, but Gideon doesn't just do things on his own." Shadows cast over Wind's face to make him look more foreshadow-y dramatic. "It's the one he works for, the most heinous being in the entire universe."

Both Awesome Soos and Magical Melody gasped. "That's right. But what's this about gold."

Wind continued to explain with one finger pointing up. "That villain does not require gold for economical purposes, there has to be something else we're missing, or they're missing."

Meanwhile in a super evil hidden castle behind a hundred couches, Gideon and his lower henchmen entered the throne room of his boss and delivered the gold.

"Tyrannical Triangle, we've came back with full satisfaction." Gideon the Kid smiled as the henchmen dropped the gold on the ground.

A giant thrown stood before them, facing the other way. "Good work, Gideon." A voice spoke to him. "Glad to see you pulled your end of the bargain, now let's begin Weirdmageddon!" The throne turned around to reveal the ultimate evil the world has ever known, Tyrannical Triangle.

(Heh, I got Bill Cipher into this)

The cyclops triangle laughed as he pet his cat, Preston.

"Why am I the cat?" Preston said as he looked at his cat body. "I can easily be a multi-millionaire villain."

"Because I said so." Bill answered him before tossing him out a window. "Now then, put the old man in the machine!"

Gideon and the others laughed. "With pleasure Tyrannical ….. old man?"

Triangle quickly glanced at Gideon with a not very amused face. "Gideon, why did you sound like you've misunderstood me when I told you to bring this?" Tyrannical Triangle then showed a poster of Grunkle Stan sitting on a pile of gold. "My exact word was, 'Bring me this.' And I drew arrows pointing to Stan himself!" Triangle shouted as he sees that they've only brought gold. "I can make gold out of milk and janitors with a snap of a finger." Triangle turned red and spawned multiple arms to point at the picture of Stan. "I wanted this this this this THIS!"

Gideon and his henchmen hugged each other in fear. "B-But why? He's just an old man with nothing but gold."

"Just an old man you say?" Triangle calmed down and revealed an image of Stan in his eye. "Stan Pines is the source of the power of all father figures!" The image showed Stan granting power to just about anything awesome. "And when I harness his powers, I can regain my true strength and spread my weirdness throughout this dimension like I did back in February!"

Gideon smiled frantically and saluted. "W-W-Well don't you worry about all that. M-My men and I will-" But without a warning, Tyrannical Triangle turned them all into statues.

"Never let a kid to do a demon's job!" Triangle's eye then showed Super Wind and Pals. "You are strong, Super Wind. But you shall beg to be cancelled and remade into a poorly written movie after I'm through with you!"

Back at Stanisgreatville, Super Wind was flying through the air as he pondered about Gideon's boss. "What could Tyrannical Triangle want with gold? Unless Gideon messed up; in that case, his funeral." Wind stopped himself. "I should send flowers. Super Flowers!"

But with his super ears, he picked up multiple cries for help. "What on this precious Earth is this?"

"Super Wind, Super Wind!" Awesome Soos and Magical Melody flew in in a panick. "Tyrannical Triangle just kidnapped Mr. Pines!"

Super Wind gasped so powerfully that he swallowed Jupiter. "Great Grapes! Not Stan Pines!" Super Wind knows about Stan's awesome powers because he is awesome also.

"Quick, my pals! We must redeem ourselves and save the universe!" The three heroes fly towards Bill Cipher.

(I MEAN TYRANNICAL WIND! I MEAN TRIANGLE!)

Where the pyramid thingy is now a giant and is on top of the Empire Grilled Steak Building with Stan in his clutches.

"Ah ha ha ha! You know on hindsight, I didn't need thugs anyway." Triangle laughed as Stan screamed in fear.

"Oh no! How am I going to be an awesome father figure to Soos if I'm pushing up daisies?"

"By not pushing up daisies!" Then Super Wind and friends showed up with awesome poses. "Surrender, evil doer! Or I shall use my most awesome powers."

Triangle just stare at Super Wind for a few seconds and then started laughing. "Super Wind, do you have any idea how much more powerful I am?"

"He's probably a lot more powerful?" Awesome Soos guessed.

"It doesn't matter at all!" Super Wind proclaimed. "Because I am a good guy!"

"Yeah yeah yeah." Triangle said as he waved his hand. "You wanna know something else? You're a poorly written original character!"

Wind gasped.

"And I'm a true Gravity Falls character with a huge and yet very disturbing fanbase! I was loved before this was even written. Which means you didn't have to build my character so people would care about me and my adventures in this story!"

Wind gasped again and swallowed the Asteroid Belt.

"You on the other hand haven't really done or said much. Why would readers care about you?" Triangle floated around Wind. "Besides, your personality is just a cardboard cut-out of the author."

"Don't listen to him, Wind!" shouted Awesome Soos. "You're awesome, and super, and great, and amazing, and other stuff!"

"Wind." Magical Melody said calmly. "There're a lot of people out there who will talk down to you, make you feel terrible, but just remember that you-"

"ZAP!" Triangle shot a laser at the two sidekicks and turned them to stone.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Wind shouted as he dove in to catch the two before they crashed onto the ground. "You ….. monster!"

Tyrannical Triangle just sprouted another arm to hold Stan as he folds his arms in disappointment. "Monster? Really? That's billions of years too old." Triangle nodded his eye. "But you know, you should join me?"

"Join you!?" Super Wind asked overly shocked.

Triangle reached out his hand and grabbed the wrapping around Wind's head. "With you by my side, I'll make your popularity grow. But first I should take this off to see your actual …. WHAT!?"

Triangle's pupil nearly shrank to microscopic sized as Stan's jaw dropped all the way back to the ground.

"S-S-S-SOOS!?"

"Hey Mr. Pines." Underneath those wrappings, was Soos all this time.

"But but that can't be!" shouted Triangle. "If you're Question Mark, than who's ….." They floated to on top of a building and Triangle restored Awesome Soos and Magical Melody. He removed Soos's mask and his arms just popped off his body.

"Ow." Stan landed on the roof and rubbed his bottom. "Watch where you drop those … what the H?" Stan shook his head to see Awesome Soos's true identity … Soos!

"I am also Soos!"

Triangle looked directly at Magical Melody and removed her mask. "I'm just Melody, nobody else."

Triangle then glanced at both Soos and Soos for a good few seconds before he shot out steam like a tea kettle. "WHAT IS GOING ON!?" Triangle pointed at the Two Soos's. "But this shouldn't be!? I should have known! I am an all knowing Dream Demon!"

"And yet I scammed you big time!" laughed Stan. "But seriously, what's going on?"

"Oh, this?" Soos Wind said as turned to the other Soos who shrugged. "Well you see…."

* * *

"And that's a wrap for today." Soos said as Melody tries to hold in her laughs.

"Wait …. Both of you….." She started rolling on the floor as Soos also gave into the laughter. "And …. And why aren't you going to finish it?"

"Because I am on hiatus now." Soos said. "I'll get to it eventually … probably never."

"So Soos." Melody calmed herself down. "You think people will like it?"

"Well truth be told, I added Bill there for popularity." Soos admitted. "So I'm pretty sure people were squealing. I'll wait a while and check out the feedback."

 **End of Chapter**


	33. Fire the Cannons

**Just for the record, throughout this fanfiction there will be spoilers from the live action journal.**

 **Chapter 33:** Fire the Cannons

Deep in the Artic Sea, Stanford Pines is in a glass dome like vehicle, interviewing something popular.

"I see, so that's how you trick the masses for so long."

Stanford Pines is having a once in a live time opportunity to interview the Loch Ness Monster herself. Which, as it turned out, really is just an invasive catfish; and by catfish I mean a 30' long (9.1 meters) hellish looking catfish with black teeth and pure white bloodshot eyes, in a poorly made plesiosaur disguise.

"Thank you for your time. Hope you have a wonderful cross-world vacation. Which somehow will include a trip to Death Valley."

The Loch Ness Monster made a call strikingly similar to a common house cat and swam away.

Filled with joy, Stanford grinned like a goof and jolted down notes in his new journal with a fish symbol on it.

'I cannot truly express how much I enjoy this expedition! Ever since we've fought off the Leviathan and the said monster freed Atlantis 2.0 from an idiocrasy-dictatorship, I've been blessed by all the paranormal creatures residing in these waters.'

Stanford Pines drew a quick sketch of the Loch Ness Monster he will re-edit later.

'I have to admit, I miss the thrill and dangers of documentary the weirdness of Gravity Falls, but at least this will be a quicker trip than expected. So I would be back to Gravity Falls during Thanksgiving where my brother and I will enjoy a traditional Thanksgiving meal with the twins and their parents.'

Stanford thought back about the Twins and his past.

'I may have been traveling through different dimensions for thirty years, but I never had a real Thanksgiving ever since I've moved to Gravity Falls back in 1975.'

Stanford took a deep breath and looked at a school of fish swimming by.

'I don't even recall my last Thanksgiving with my parents, let alone last meal. Even though they seemed to have shrugged it off, things weren't really the same after Stanley was kicked out after ruining my chance at a more successful life ….. but that is all in the past. My brother and I have finally gotten back together and Bill Cipher is no more; and his death alone is more than enough to give up that other possibility.'

Stanford chuckled softly.

'Well an easy going adventure is probably for the best. We are pushing 70 after all. But sometimes I wonder about passing from this world. Stanley has been the best partner I had since Fiddleford and Dipper, but someone needs to continue researching the paranormal of both Gravity Falls and this world. And who would be better than Dipper Pines.'

Stanford made a sketch of his great nephew looking more confident.

'I remember our time at Crash Site Omega, where I talked with Dipper about being my apprentice. But it was best for him to go home with his sister and grow up like a normal kid. Plus I think his parents would refuse to allow both their kids to come back if they learned about the paranormal. So it was most likely doomed to fail since the beginning. I miss being young.'

Stanford smiled when he drew himself at age 12.

'But I'm sure he'll want that opportunity after college, or high school at the very least. An 18 year old man picking up where I left off, exploring more and more and perhaps discover the true meaning of my Theory of Weirdness ….. or get what I could never have, a girlfriend.'

Stanford sighed miserably.

'He's like a younger version of me. I swear if he finds love, I will be asking him a couple million questions….non-stop! But who am I kidding? I've said it myself, I'm nearly 70! What choice do I have with love at this age? Nothing, nothing at all! I sometimes cuddle with my pillow to make myself feel less lonely … I should erase this part.'

Stanford's episode was interrupted when he noticed Stanley driving up with an eager face. The two both activated their communication channels to speak.

"Hey Sixer, I just hatched an idea to explore Old Levi's place while he's out of town. Wanna come?"

"In a minute, Stanley, I'm finishing off my entry for today."

Stanley drove in closer to see his bookworm brother writing in his journal.

"You know; bro. I've been checking out the copies you've brought along, mostly the third one."

"Really, anything interests you?" Stanford asked with a smile

Stanley however did not look so happy. "You said to me when we first got here that you didn't go to alternate Earths." Stanley then showed his brother the pages about alternate Earths. "Yet here they are! And other stuff written down before I copied the pages! And I don't recall Dipper bringing back your journals safe and sound and in mint condition and us tossing them in the bottomless pit! Which you were so O.K. with even though we fought over it back then thirty years ago! And where are those invisible writing?"

Stanford was without words. At first he thought Stanley was talking nonsense; but the more he collects his memories, the more he realizes that something was up. "….. Wait, wait a minute! How in the He-"

"WAIT! I JUST THOUGHT OF SOMETHING!" Stanley shouted; interrupting his brother's shaken mind. "Before you release your journals to sell, mention in an interview that the original had original ink. Don't even hint that the copies will have invisible ink! And then, when they're all sold and people start complaining, release a 'limited' addition with invisible ink! That way they'll have to buy your books twice … what were we talking about before?"

"Heh." Stanford shrugged. "But for those parallel Earths ….. well there are indeed countless of them. Some …. Are just not worth mentioning." Stanford felt his stomach.

"Hey bro, feeling alright?" Stanley asked his now green brother.

"No … I'm alright …. Say! I did meet Dipper and Mabel before." Stan's normal skin tone returned as he looked happy. "How could I forget their faces when …" Suddenly he turned green again and turned around to throw up.

"I …. Uhhh …. I'm ….. I'm fixing the Memory Gun when we get back."

 **End of Chapter**

 **L'p krslqj wklp doo d olqhv hadfwob olnh pb idqilf.**

* * *

Forgot to mention this, but 'The Keeper of Worlds''s idea will become a suggested chapter later on. He/she/space alien had given me some very good ideas, but the one I chose will focus on Pacifica and Wendy.


	34. Guide to Homeroom

**Chapter 34:** Guide to Homeroom

"And that is why my brother Dipper is a huge dork!" Mabel said happily in front of the camera. She was filming in Dipper's bedroom where he was writing at his desk.

"It's called doing a crossword, Mabel."

"And scene!"

"I still don't know why you're doing these videos. You're not allowed to post them online."

* * *

A montage of Mabel scenes were played while Mabel's name was repeated with several different pitches.

Then it cuts to Mabel in a classroom. "Welcome to Mabel's Guide to: Homeroom!" Mabel showed all her classmate's faces on this beautiful Monday morning. "Come on. Turn those tired faces upside down!"

Not even Mabel's charm could brighten their moods.

"Well they're all no shows. Let Mabel here tell you all there is to know about Homeroom."

"Are you even allowed to have that here?" Dipper asked.

"Shut up, Dipper!" Mabel shouted as she turned the camera towards her homeroom teacher. "This here is Mr. Barney! Say hello!"

The middle-aged male teacher was looking at a newspaper, looking just as tired as the class.

"Good!" Mabel aimed the camera outside and there was the same fox chasing down a rabbit. "Quick, bunny! In here!" Mabel reached out the window to try to save the rabbit, but Dipper pulled her back.

"Mabel! How many times did I warn you?"

Mabel sighed painfully as they both say "Wild Animals have wild diseases. Especially when they're in a 'Life or Death' situation."

"But Dipper, that fox really needs to eat carrots."

Dipper sighed and sat back in his desk.

"Anyway, let's get down to-" Mabel heard a painful cry outside and she quickly closed the window. "Business."

Mabel recorded around the room. "Homeroom is where students of Middle through High School go to first to be prepared for the battlefield!"

"Roll call. Mabel."

"No one asked you!" shouted Mabel as the students groaned. "Here is where you get to talk to all your friends first thing before all that boring stuff happens." She aimed her camera at Beethoven. "Say something, Beethoven."

Beethoven, who was in the middle of picking his ear with a pencil, noticed the love of his life filming him. "Ah!" Beethoven threw the pencil and tried to stand heroically, only to fall right off this desk. "I'm A-O.K.!" He held his thumb up from where he lay.

"Now we have ….. Dyami. Heh heh heh." She turned the camera to Dyami, who looked more awake than the others, but till had that hint of Monday Weariness. And Mabel used the powers of editing to make hearts appear around him. "Hey Dyamiiiii. Got anything to say?"

Dyami looked at the camera and winked. "I only have one quiz this week, I am perfectly calm for the next day of our education!" He then showed her some pictures of mystical creature using fire. "Also I've looked up some possible creature that guardian might be!"

"Eeeeeeeee!" Mabel then noticed a black-haired goth girl sitting behind Dyami, who she remembered from the first day of school. She adjusted her small glasses as she reads a scary book to herself quietly, which gave Mabel a great idea. She shushed at the camera and slowly walked to her. She counted down with her fingers and "BOO!"

The goth girl just glanced at Mabel and sighed. "Oh ha ha ha. How original." She turned back to her book without giving Mabel another moment.

"Huh, she's not so friendly, is she?" Mabel asked the camera. "But I'll add her to another potential crush for Dipper."

"Mabeeeeel." Dipper sighed to himself quietly as the goth girl blushed and pushed her face deeper into the book.

"But the most important part of homeroom is the T.V. over there." Mabel pointed the camera at the very outdated T.V. hanging at the upper corner of the wall. "You may not believe it, but our school has channel one! Channel ONE!" Mabel shouted. "Have you ever tried turning to that channel at home? You get nothing! And what's on it you may ask?" Mabel pushed her face close to the camera. "Our own station with our fellow students!"

"Mabel, I told you this before." Dipper spoke up. "That happens with every school. Channel One is just a substitute. And we only use it to make our pledge and hear about club events."

"Dipper, you're ruining the video magic!" shouted Mabel. "Speaking of pledge." Mabel put the camera on her desk and placed her hand on her heart like the rest of the students when the American flag appeared.

"I pledge allegiance, to the-"

"Racist, lizard people!" shouted a random guy from out the window. "And this fox here is the child of Trumpetcreeper and Chin-ton!" after the sound of the fox being hurt, a red blur latched onto the man's face as he fell down and cries of pain and scratches could be heard.

"And they think I'm a great choice for this job." Mr. Barney said as he closed the window and dropped the curtains. "O.K., name call." Mr. Barney read the list down of each student as they raised their hands and answered 'here'.

"O.K., I think that's …. Wait, we have a new one. Sigh." He checked the list. "Jessica Smith?"

"Here!" coming into the room, out of breath, came in a new face to the class. "Sorry I'm late. I've gotten lost."

"Whatever. Like I need more of you anyways."

Everyone in the class just waved friendly towards her, but Dipper recognized her right off the bat. "Hey, I remember you."

The girl in the gray bobble cap, a green long-sleeved cap, and black sweatpants looked at Dipper and smirked. "The boy who helped me out with that porcupine." She took an empty seat next to Dipper. "I see you got your hat back."

Dipper smiled and secured his hat tightly. "Yep, and trust me it was much harder getting it back than you can imagen."

"Hey, when'd that kid get here?"

"For the last time! I am Mabel's brother, Dale! And yes, Becky, I am in Tuba Club with you!" Dipper shouted. "Sorry about that." Dipper told Jessica. "For some reason everyone remembers my sister, but not me."

"Bummer, man." Jessica said calmly.

After hearing her say that, Dipper glanced at her curiously. "Have we met?"

"Duh, at the park. Like I just said." She gave him a playful smile as she tapped her head.

"No, I mean somewhere else." Dipper placed his hand on his chin. "Mm, probably not."

"You're right." Jessica responded. "This is the first time I'm here. Family just moved into town. Somewhere near the edge of Piedmont." She pointed back with her thumb. "Have to say, nice place."

The bell then quickly rung and everyone groaned.

"And that was Mabel's Guide to Homeroom! See ya all next time for another exciting Guide."

"Hey, no cameras!" shouted Mr. Barney as Mabel closed the video.

"And now we go into real time." Mabel said with wonder.

"Mabel, you were just recording, ah forget it."

"Yes, Mabel wins!" Mabel skipped out the class with victory as Mr. Barney sighed.

"Why isn't she anything like you, Dipper?" Mr. Barney said with a smile.

"Hey, wouldn't have her any other way." Dipper picked up his books. "And I can't wait for more of your chemistry class this year."

"Me too, because you're the only one that pays attention, and not shoot spitballs at my head. Or at the very least try to and just swallow it instead." Mr. Barney glared at Beethoven.

"Hey, I was out of practice."

"You'll never be a bully, period."

Jessica picked her books up too. "Well I better get to class and adjust to this new life. I'll see ya around."

"You too." Dipper said as the two walked out of the classroom and went their separate ways.

"Huh, she seems nice." Dipper thought to himself. "But there's something about her cute face that's familiar … did I just think she was cute?"

"Dipper, why are you blushing?"

Dipper was caught off guard by Mabel appearing next to him. "Mabel, can you please-"

"You were probably thinking of that Jessica girl!" Mabel squealed.

Dipper deeply sighed. "This is going to be a looooooong day."

"And that is why I should make a 'Mabel's Guide to: School!'" Mabel took out the camera again. "We will discuss why we can't bring our backpacks around and if that's really meat at the cafeteria. But first, walking in crowded hallways!"

 **The End**

 **Vruuv, qr Kdoorzhhq Vshfldo. Zdlw xqwlo wklv vwrub jhwv wkhuh.**


	35. Tip the Scale

**Chapter 35:** Tip the Scale

"And that is why jaywalking is uncool." At Eggbert Middle School's auditorium, a play was shown featuring some very poorly paid actors trying to teach the kids the dangers of very common things; and yes, it was painful to watch, but not for Dipper.

He was sitting near the middle section snickering to himself. "I am so glad I'm watching this." He sarcastically said softly, but enough for the students around him to hear. "I totally imagined that walking teddy bear nightmare as myself when it tried to climb into an operating wood chipper. This will definitely help me with my 'shredding myself to pieces' habit."

The students around him started to snicker.

"And boy that smoking warning, that makes me real hungry for something healthy enough to feed the population legally. Why not some fried bacon burgers and an extra-large soda with the tiniest bit of mold on the cups."

Everyone around Dipper nearly broke out in laughter before the show ended and the actors took their paychecks and left.

The bell rung and all the kids gathered their belongings and went outside for their rides, but Dipper was still making some humorous comments about the play to the students.

"I mean really, do you really expect kids today to dress like that with pride when fighting gingivitis monsters? I doubt they were ever popular in the 70s, period."

With freedom at hand, all the kids laughed loudly without being scolded.

"Oh boy, you sure know what to say, new kid." One girl said.

"Uhhhh, actually I've been a student, I'm Mabel Pines' brother."

The kids went silent for a moment before on spoke. "That's impossible. We would have noticed someone as hilarious as you before … wait wait!" I do remember you!" one kid pointed out. "Yeah, we were in Elementary school together. I laughed at you when you didn't get any Valentines …. Sorry."

"No Valentines for this comedic genius?" one girl asked. "Well not this school year. I'll make one that he'll crack another one-liner."

"Not if I make one even funnier!" said another girl.

"He should really check out this movie that just came out." One boy said. "He'll point out more mistakes than I can. We are gonna pee ourselves to death."

The lucky few that rode the bus with Dipper heard more of Dipper's hilarious jokes and comments all the way through the city before dropping the Paranormal Club off at their stop.

"Tomorrow I'm bringing my cat over so you can joke about it." One boy shouted. "It hates me!"

The cheerful Dipper waved goodbye as the bus drove off. "Man, I haven't gotten anyone to laugh at my jokes." Dipper smiley gazed met his sister overly-hyper scrunched face.

"You did it!" Mabel gave his scrawny brother a huge hug. "You're becoming popular!"

Dipper could feel a new kind of pride in himself. "And all I had to do was make some hilarious comebacks at that play, just like my movie nights with Wendy."

"You went on dates already?" Beethoven asked which caused Dipper to blush. "Got any advice? Pleeeeeaaase." He asked desperately, giving Dipper puppy dog eyes.

"Woah there, they weren't dates."

Dipper's face was then caught by Mabel's grasp. "Dipper Pines. Listen very closely." She moved closer to Dipper's face with a very focused look. "You're hopeless chance at getting Wendy did not succeed as planned, but you learned wisely from it, my pupil." Mabel wrapped her arm around Dipper's neck, choking him a bit. "With your powers, you'll achieve greatness and more friends, and possibly." She glee softly. "A girlfriend your age!"

"I agree with Mabel like the night agrees with the moon." Dyami said, which made Mabel want to faint.

"Wait, what does that even mean?" Beethoven asked, which was left unanswered as Dyami continued to talk with Dipper.

"You're a good person with a great personality. You've have open yourself to others and now they know you exist in this world. Continue your path and you'll find what the heart thirst for."

"But first we got to do something about those noodle arms." Beethoven said. "No offense this time, but women loves guns like these." Beethoven flexed to show off his 'muscles', which of course was meant for Mabel, who didn't even bat an eye. "Women loves guns like these." Beethoven flexed again, and the same results happened. "Aaaah."

Dipper was feeling a bit bashful from everyone's praise. "O.K., let's not get too carried away."

"You're right." Mabel said. "You haven't watched my 'Mabel's Guide to: Dating 2' yet." Mabel placed her hands on her hips. "But first you must learn the arts of friendship."

"You mean friends are people you share good bonds with and are always there to help you out and enjoy one's company just because they like you, not for what it is in it for them. And plenty of people will use this as an advantage for their own gain and to hurt the one who offered their friendship."

"… Yeah, that." Mabel responded. "So good!" Mabel looked out into the horizon. "And soon you'll become as popular as me. Then we can take over High School and I'll replace everyone's hormones with glitter. Then when prom comes, I'll be the queen and one lucky guy who may be near me may become my king."

Beethoven gasped with joy.

"And Dipper ….. you can be the Prom Bishop."

"Do you even know what a bishop is?" Dipper asked.

"Not a princess, that's for sure."

Dipper laughed. "Well I'm actually glad this is happening, but I doubt I'll be as popular as you."

"Well that's true." Mabel said, which Dipper responded with a raised eyebrow. "But you'll be my apprentice and no one will ever forget you exist. By the end of this week, you'll be with good terms with everyone."

 **Friday**

"HOW ON EARTH DID HE BECOME MORE POPULAR THAN ME!?" Mabel was completely astonished during lunch when all the kids were surrounding Dipper, but not her.

All that stood by her side were Beethoven and Dyami.

"I guess that movie was worse than I thought." Dyami answered. "That's all their talking about."

Beethoven proudly folded his arms. "Don't worry, Me-lady. I'll- I mean Mabel! I'll stay by your side."

Then they noticed the new girl Jessica and the Goth Girl talking with Dipper.

"Man, that was hilarious!" Jessica then punched Dipper in the arm, which hurt him like heck.

"Ow, looks like I'm not getting on your bad side anytime soon." Dipper felt his arm. "Like the movie's production staff and the guys who funded them."

Goth Girl covered her mouth to hide a giggle. "You are very funny. Perhaps we should hang out sometimes."

"And now he's getting dates with Jessica and Goth Girl." Mabel said out loud.

"You do realize she has a name." Dyami said. "She actually wants to join our Paranormal Club." He then noticed Mabel glaring at her brother. "Are you jealous?"

"Yes." Mabel said. "I did not predict Dipper to be this popular. Soon I'll be the forgotten one."

"Blasphemy!" shouted Beethoven.

Mabel played around with her fingers. "I must come up with a plan to get him not that popular and make me popular."

Dyami was taken a bit back by Mabel's words. "Mabel. That …. That actually sounds like a terrible thing to do."

Dyami's words struck like lightning to Mabel's mind. "Ahhhhh! Bad thoughts!" Mabel rubbed her tongue clean while shouting 'blah' over and over. "Oh boy. For a minute there I thought I might have to summon a ghost to pull pranks on Dipper, or get a cute boy's number. Ahem, a cute boy's nuuuuummmmbeeeeeer. Huh … huh…."

Mabel's hint to Dyami practically deflected off him.

"Aaaah." Mabel slouched. "Heh, there's no way I'll be forgotten." Mabel smiled. "Soon the Pines twins will be the most popular kids in school aaaaaaaand Dipper just ruined it."

Mabel pointed out to all the unamused kids when Dipper took out Dungeons, Dungeons, and More Dungeons. "Come on, anyone interested?" Dipper asked.

All the kids just looked at one another. "Hey, wanna ignore this forever, but still acknowledge his existence?"

"Sure, but whenever he cracks a pun, I'm first in line to hear it!" The kids went back to their table to eat their lunch.

"Well … problem solved?" Mabel asked, unsure of what to say. But then noticed two students standing next to him. "Wait, Jessica and Goth Girl are still with him!"

"Her name's Kimmy." Dyami said. "I'll introduce you to her and-"

"Shush!" Mabel covered his mouth. "Let this grow." Mabel said as she watched carefully as the potential match making. "He better choose one. Not like last time. I mean one guy and two girls, Blah. Unlike one girl and two guys! I miss my dream boys."

"But I'm both me!" said Beethoven. "I mean uh …."

Mabel paid him no attention as she watched an unusually rare case, a girl taking interest in Homework the Game. And that girl is Kimmy, who was awing at the game with sparkling large eyes. "I haven't played this game in years!"

"Seriously?!" Dipper asked in shock, well more shocked at the fact that a girl is interested in DD, n' MD.

"Yes." Kimmy said, back in her normal emotionless voice. "We should play sometimes."

"Eeeeee!" Mabel quietly gleed.

Jessica on the other hand wasn't so interested. "Eh, not mah kind of game. But that monster looks awesome!" She pointed at some muscular yeti thing with antlers. "And is that a dead dragon caught in a spider web? Sweet! ….. but the game is probably super boring to me."

"Uhhhh, well you don't have to play it."

"Yeah, but I'll rather the real thing." Jessica said happily. "Fighting monsters, exploring scary places. Man, the only place I know that slightly matches that is that long dirt road leading into the forest."

Dipper could feel his face heating up. "Well in fact, I'm in a Paranormal Club run by Dyami Grey."

"And I will be joining that club." Kimmy said. "It matches me perfectly."

Jessica folded her arms. "So are you gonna check out that road?"

"What road?" Dipper thought for a moment before remembering. "Ohhhh. That road." Dipper recalled the old road leading into the forest near the park with a broken sign. Dipper had always been curious about the place ever since he was old enough to look out the car window with his booster seat. "To tell you the truth, I don't know where that goes."

"And we'll be exploring that place, after school!" Mabel randomly joined in. "You two should really see Dipper in action!"

"Mabel…"

"And by after school, I of course mean during our curfew." Mabel smiled. "So what do you say?

"Sounds good to me." Jessica said. "How about we meet at 4?"

"S-Sure thing." Dipper felt his heart racing, but kept calm.

"And what about you, Goth Girl?"

"My name is Kimmy." She said. "And …. Well I'm not sure we should go there."

"Pitooie, we're going and that's final."

The bell rung and Mabel gasped. "I forgot to eat!" Mabel rushed to her table and swallowed her food whole. "I regretted that!"

Jessica chuckled at Mabel's action. "Well I'll see you during class." Jessica waved goodbye and left the group.

"See ya. Jessica." Dipper waved. "Well, she seems nice."

"Is that all you have to say?" Mabel smiled at Dipper.

"Mabel, I know what you're thinking."

"One girl, that is all!" Mabel said before turning to Kimmy. "Keep up the pace."

"Huh?" Kimmy asked before Mabel and Beethoven left. "You all shouldn't really go."

Dipper noticed Kimmy a little worried. "Don't sweat it. Trust me, I've handled a lot worst when I was spending the summer up in Oregon."

"Oregon?" Kimmy asked. "Well … if the club is doing it. I'll go."

"Don't mind Mabel if you really don't want to come. She's …. One of a kind."

"Hurry up, you two. We'll be late." Dyami said, catching the two by surprised.

"Yikes, we'll be late." Dipper packed his things and headed out. "See you around."

"See you as well." Kimmy said as she felt her arm worrying.

 **End of Chapter**

 **Wkdqmvjlylqj lv qhaw, qrw Fksvwpdv.**


	36. In My Shoes

**Chapter 36:** In My Shoes

 **Request by** **Keeper of the Worlds**

There's just something magical about 3:00 p.m. on a Friday. Another weekend is upon us, nights have more freedom, and unless you work in an annoying family business where your 'mind already left' grandparents runs the place, you can sleep in the next day.

And that is how Wendy whatever her middle name is Corduroy likes it. I just don't feel liking looking up if she does have one.

She recently left school and decide to sit on a bench in the middle of the park. She literally had three tests in a row and thankfully passed them (well that what she prayed for). She would usually go straight to doing teen stuff with her friends; but just like them, she just wants to rest her mind; especially with what happened Sunday. Exploring the Blind Eye's base, learning more about the Wind of a Hurricane, nearly surviving against some zombie whatevers wanting to eat her and say stuff Nazis will like, and of course her father revealing that not only that he used to be a Blind Eye, but also that he knew about the Stan Pines switch. Also the Blind Eye had her Mimendo 65 all this time. That was bummer also.

And of course she does not want to remember the icing on the cake of it all, an erased memory of a younger her kissing Dipper.

She refused to think back to that and just enjoy the cool breeze of the coming fall season. She looked at the still green leaves and imagen them all changing during the end of October when Halloween truly arrives, and during November when everyone have a nice Thanksgiving dinner and then play football until someone breaks a leg.

She would think about Christmas, but she never really celebrated that holiday. But judging from all the Christmas decorations popping out NOW ….. she can safely say that people are milking it.

As time go by, she watched people walk by doing their usual routine like jogging, sight-seeing, and even a mother and daughter playing on the swing, however a familiar face caught her attention. Pacifica Northwest was walking towards her, looking completely drained.

She noticed the blank tired stare she had placed on her face, one she had when she learned the existence of ghosts, which was probably not the first if she'd overlooked another missing memory.

Pacifica walked right next to Wendy and took the open spot on the bench. Giving a big sigh, Wendy felt the urge not to speak up, but couldn't up but feel relatable to her.

"Sup."

Pacifica looked up at Wendy and sigh. "This week ….."

"You mean with the Blind Eye and those Zombie Nutjobs?"

"THAT … and what came rolling along right after."

Pacifica told her about that furball and its death, and then she'd discovered that her pet Llama Pearl actually does have acidic saliva.

"I mean why?! She licked my face before and sure it was gross, but it didn't burn me!"

And then Pacifica admitted that she really wants the Blind Eye back, when each and every day of this week had paranormal written all over it.

"Then after Tuesday, Pearl licked a rock and revealed a golden orb that my dad took. Guess what, it was cursed. Turned him into an 80's sitcom character for three hours. Then on Thursday some flying eyeballs roosted in our trees. My dad thought he could use them as an attraction, but slapped himself when he thinks he'll end up like Mr. Pines. But today …. Ugh!"

(Flashback)

Pacifica, Candy, and Grenda sat in homeroom quietly, observing the situation at hand.

"Grenda." Candy spoke to her friend. "Remember that one student who took it too far with their heart?"

The three just stare at all the strange dark creatures crawling around the class.

(End flashback)

And then some boys came over, who Candy seemed to have a liking too and took pictures for Mabel, just killed them all with giant keys! And then some white things showed up and they killed them too! And then somehow that turned them all back to normal! But I just gave up and tried to ignore it when some old bald guy started talking."

Pacifica looked up at Wendy who paid attention to everything she told her.

"Man….. that … was awesome!"

Pacifica was dumbfounded by the lumberjack girl's reaction as she commented on the week she had.

"An acid spitting llama! You probably got that from that radioactive petting zoo across town. Oh ho ho, did you get pictures of your dad acting weird? And we had some flying eyeball bats infestation before, just throw soap at 'em. And I can't believe you get to watch some boys kill shadow monsters with keys. I would kill to live that week!"

Pacifica shook her head in disbelief. "W-What ….. how …. You don't find this crazy!?"

"Crazy and fun!" Wendy jumped off the bench. "If I were there, I would have thrown my hatchet at all of em! I bet Thompson would bodyslam them!"

Pacifica started to flinch. "But …. But you were silent when those zombie things tried to eat you and your dad told you he was a Blind Eye."

"I know … that was ugh." Wendy threw her arms down. "And don't get me started on past me kissing ….. well it was a rough day. But boy what you went through, it was just like swatting a fly for Dipper and Mabel. Wished I was on more mystery trips."

"Is this what Dipper does for a living?" Pacifica asked Wendy. "I have to say he's more than meet the eye, but doesn't this all drain you?"

"Drain me?" Wendy held up three fingers. "There are only three things that drive me crazy? School and everyone in it, work, and my family."

"You cannot be serious?" Pacifica asked with disgust. "Those are all like normal and simple. How can you consider normal routine abominable and monsters and ghosts sane?"

Wendy let out a small laugh. "Rich girl. You're still in Middle School. That's just a taste." She bends down to get eye level with her. "And I'm sure you cannot comprehendwork, but my family is a completely different story. Try growing up with three siblings, all boys."

"Can't be as hard as you say?" Pacifica folded her arms. "I'm positive I can hold your place."

Wendy rubbed her chin as an idea crawled into her head. "Is that a bet I hear?"

Pacifica raised an eyebrow. "I think I know what you're going to bring up. Switching places temporary to see who's right?"

"Bingo." Wendy snapped her fingers.

Pacifica gave the idea some thought. "If my family still had our so-called 'honor' back, my dad will refuse the idea of me living in whatever you live in." She smiled and held out her hand. "It's a deal."

Wendy was about to shake it, but had second thoughts. "You're not Bill, are you?"

Pacifica placed her hands on her hips and glared at Wendy. "Test me."

Pacifica immediately regretted it when Wendy lifted up a snake in front of the girl.

"Eeeek!" Pacifica shrieked Wendy gave a good laugh and tossed the snake away.

"Relax; I held it by the head."

"That was venomous!?"

After calming down, Wendy thought of something. "You know. If we do switch places, our families would totally treat us differently."

"And what would you suggest?"

* * *

"This science confusing rug right here." The two girls were now at the Mystery Shack's break room. Wendy showed the rich girl the mind-swapping rug as Soos rolled it out.

"I was a pig last time." Soos randomly added.

Wendy turned to Pacifica and explained that they will just swap minds and no one will notice. Pacifica felt her face and made multiple outcomes of how this will end.

"I refuse to climb up a tree with rabid rats and birds!"

Wendy laughed. "Relax. It will rain tomorrow, and this is going to be for one day. Can't let you ruin my homework …. Which I got for the week-END." Wendy slightly raised her voice. "And you said you have no plans, and this Saturday is going to be our monthly 'quiet' days. See if you can survive that."

Pacifica glanced at the rug and Wendy. This sounded all stupid to her and the thought of Wendy jumping off a cliff just for kicks in her body made her mentally sick; but despite her parents terrible parenting skills, they did taught her to always go for the challenge, minus peer pressure.

"Fine."

"Hey guys, I just founded some loose newspaper articles about Mr. Pines's supposed death and everything relating to Mr. Pines's and the Ford's past." Soos also found a small journal of Ford Pines and gave it a quick read. "Woah. This pretty much tells the whole 'Tale of Two Stans'. Man, if we found this sooner, oh boy."

Following Soos's instructions, Wendy and Pacifica removed their shoes and conducted static electricity. They both hold out their fingers and the static swapped their minds in a flash.

After seeing their original bodies in front of them, the two started to examine their bodies and noticed huge differences.

"I'm twelve again!" Wendy in Pacifica's body looked at herself in the mirror. "Wow, didn't expect your body to be packed!" Wendy checked her arm to find it stronger than she would expect from the 'I'll pay you to pre-chew my food' kind of girl."

"I had multiple classes involving self-defense." Pacifica said as she taken in how tall Wendy is. "Woah. I don't have to get a servant to reach something." Pacifica examined her new arms and found them packed as well. "Hey, are you old enough to drive?"

"Next month, but let's focus on our bet." Wendy said as rubbed her hands. "…. Yeah I got nothing you like."

"Why not just do this for the satisfaction of being right?"

"Sure."

And so after a long and humorous discussion on how to act (and multiple 'fancy life' jokes thrown by Wendy) the two left towards each other's homes to experience the other one's life.

Wendy walked up to the new Northwest Mansion and took a huge sigh of relief. "I am so glad I never own a diary. Heh …. She's gonna faint from all the tomboy stuff." Wendy walked into the main entrance and called out to her temporary folks.

"I'm home, Northwe- I mean Dad and Mmm-"

"Hello, daughter." Preston and Priscilla Northwest spoke simultaneously. "I see you're just as energetic as we are." Preston smiled with a happier mood than before.

"So what's going down with this rich family, dad and M-"

"'What's going down'!?" Preston asked as he looked to his wife. "I knew PUBLIC school would do this to you sooner or later." Preston kneeled down to who he believes is his daughter and placed his firm hands on Wendy's shoulders. "Our friends, the Freemasons, will be coming tomorrow for dinner." He stood right up and grinned. "They informed us that they can help us get right back to where we truly belong! We just need to be as proper and well-mannered as possible."

"Dinner?" Wendy asked. "If you want to impress them; all you need is some pizza, plenty of snacks, and get a bad movie to make fun at. And let's not forget random dance parties!" " _Oh that slipped._ " Wendy thought to herself. " _Hope they don't take it too seriously._ "

From looking at the two's horrid faces, Wendy nearly wanted to laugh if she didn't knew that this could mean some issues with her deal.

"Our daughter ….. have finally lost it!" Preston took out the bell and rung it at Wendy. Seeing no reaction, Preston kept on ringing the bell and the lumberjack girl stuck in a bleach blonde valley girl body just looked at Preston as if he has two heads. "And now this is permanently useless!" Preston threw the bell on the ground and stomped on it. "O.K., we can fix this …." He bent down to her daughter again. "Listen, Pacifica. We have about twenty-four hours to mold you back to her true self. We are going to reteach you proper greetings, the exact body gestures, formal wears, and we are going to stick our pinkies out that would probably cause muscle strains!"

Wendy raised one lower eyelid as her mind tried to comprehend what all this will mean, but one word keeps popping up, no sleeping in on Saturday.

"I think I made a huge mistake. And I have some serious questions about that bell."

* * *

Over at the Corduroy resident, Pacifica was also having huge second thoughts about the whole deal. It started with her walking into the cabin expecting nothing but lounging all day, not an axe nearly cutting her face right off.

"Sorry!" three boys shouted as they run upstairs, causing several crashing noises.

"I take back everything I said about you, redhead."

She cautiously moved (by that I mean like a maniac ready to mentally break down) into the kitchen hoping to get some soda, but all she found was root beer and everything else that spells out 'Ew'.

She opened the fridge to find a good snack, only to be disgusted by the meat she found that does not look like it came from livestock.

Pacifica slammed the door and found a chore list on the fridge. She took a look and noticed the boys did their chores, but hers …. Was indeed a lot.

"I have to clean the toilet?!" she shouted with disbelief. "Ew ew, this is servant work!"

"Wendy?" Pacifica looked to see her temporary brothers looking at her. "Why are you acting like a rich girl?"

"Uhhhhhh."

"Yeah, like Pacifica." The youngest one said, and of course he started gushing. "I just want to pet her hair forever."

"I let an opossum in and it definitely did some business somewhere in your room." The middle one stated randomly.

"Anyway, we have to get ready for practice." The eldest said. "See ya for dinner."

"What wait!" Pacifica shouted before all three ran out the door, which let in a horde of opossums in, ruining the entire living room and shrieking loudly.

"I want my old life back.

* * *

"I want my bed back." Wendy stated as Priscilla scolded her about her dress. "I don't care if its sea soap-green or lima bean green, it's green!"

"Does this bell work?" Preston brought in an old metal bell and rung it.

"No, just like those other bells." Wendy pointed to the pile of broken bells. "And I think you have some serious parenting issues." Wendy glared at Preston. "I think you need to speak with some people who'll bring you to a nice 'big house'."

"What is wrong with you?" Preston asked his daughter. "My father raised me like this just as his dad did. It has to be a common parenting method to keep children like yourself in place."

"I stand corrected." The Northwest gasped with relief as their daughter spoke. "You need therapy. I think Mabel made a video about this." Wendy shouted before yawning. "And I need to go to bed; it's 3 in the morning!"

Preston held in a powerful grunt, but did notice the time. "Well you're right about that. If we cannot fix this, we'll just tell The Freemasons you're sick with the flu."

"Sweet." Wendy ran off, but tripped on her dress. "Women wear pants for a reason now!" Wendy stood up and walked naturally, and still tripped. "How much am I wearing?"

Wendy walked down the hall and calmed herself down. "O.K., this is hard, and of course if I told blondie that she'll never let me live it down, especially when nobody else cares."

She took a deep breath as she continued to walk. "But I totally see why she wants to change now. Sure glad Dipper stopped that ghost problem of hers. I would probably would have been there, if I wasn't the only few people in town to not care about that party."

Wendy continued to walk down the hall until she realized something. She has no idea where Pacifica's bedroom is.

"Bed, bed, bed!" Wendy nearly burst through every door to find her room. She even tried finding Mr. and Mrs. Northwest for directions, but apparently they were just as hard to find.

That all changed when she finally stumbled upon the door that reads 'Pacifica's Room'

"Finally ….."

She slowly opened the door and was quite impressed with how Pacifica lives. She wasn't into all that girly stuff, but she did admire the balcony, large mirror dresser, a private bathroom, and no brothers to bother her.

And of course the centerpiece of the room, the bed.

"I'm sorry 'Mah Bed', looks like I have no choice." Wendy removed her shoes and jumped right towards the bed, only to be caught midair by Preston.

"What the F- I mean what? Do I need my pinkie out?"

"Honey, it's 6 a.m.!"

"No duh … It's 6 already!?"

"And I made a huge error." Preston let his ahem, daughter down. "The Freemasons are here for breakfast, and they specifically asked for you to attend."

Nearly every stick in her head snapped.

"Already, chill it!" shouted Wendy. "I am not your daughter!"

Preston gasped.

"I'm Wendy Corduroy! I switched minds with your kid to see who has the more stressed life!"

"Oh." Preston calmed himself. "So then ….. I would assume you're lying, but what had happened last month and the party ….."

To prove it to him officially, Pacifica spit on the floor, messed up her hair, and picked up a cup with her pinkie down."

"O.K. that is convincing, and the way you've acted all this time ….. parents use bells to train children, right?"

"Seriously, you have problems. Let me sleep!"

Preston started sweating as he tries to figure out what to do. "But I need to impress the Freemasons."

"Don't care." Wendy lay in bed. "Nothing is going to get me out of this bed …. It's so much softer than mine." As Wendy felt the sheets, Preston came up with an idea to win her over.

"I'll pay for your new car when you receive your licenses."

In a split second, Wendy sprung out of bed. "It's a deal as long as you record your promise on video, and allow me to bring it to everyone in town so you don't try backing down."

"Deal ….. I just realized your voice doesn't match my daughter's by a long shot."

"Yeah … You know, I've seen T.V. shows that did that, but it doesn't really make any sense."

"I wonder the same thing too."

"…"

"…."

"Rethink your childhood, man."

* * *

10 a.m., the alarm clock rung, alerting the 12 year old in a 15 year old body that it's time to wake up. Pacifica slowly opened her eyes and turned the alarm off. "I … I need to get my body back."

She stretched her borrowed body and yawned. "But I have to admit, it's nice waking up at this time."

After doing all the disgusting chorus and fixing everything that will get broken again in the next hour, and getting all those opossums out, Pacifica just crawled into Wendy's bed and slept through the whole night.

"Kids, breakfast!"

Pacifica heard Manly Dan calling from downstairs, and the smell of breakfast inviting her down. She had thoughts about eating greasy food, but this was not her body and she was too drained to care.

She and the brothers rushed downstairs and sat at the family table. Pacifica just stares in awe as Manly Dan placed pancakes and bacon on their plates. "Eat up!"

As the boys chowed down, Pacifica took her time and enjoyed every taste of it. It wasn't anything fancy like she was used too, but something about common food just seems so different and just a bit adventurous.

"Man, dad. You make the best pancakes." The middle brother said. (I need to come up with names for them)

"But sis here makes the best salmon lunch!" the eldest brother said.

"Why thank you." Pacifica said in her formal manner, which the boys did not take notice too.

"So how was practice?" Manly Dan asked the boys.

"Awesome!" shouted all three. "We chucked three boulders at once!"

"That's my boys!" Dan wrapped there three boys with one arm and gave them all nuggies.

"Hey Wendy, come play!" the youngest one offered.

"Oh, why-" Without receiving an answer, the boys dragged her in too.

Pacifica felt like she had jumped right off a plane that was her comfort zone, but the free fall felt nice, in the strangest way. As her head was being rubbed, she tried remembering similar times she'd spend with her own family.

Which was none.

But she still can't believe how Wendy made it in life with these numbskulls, let alone work and school. She even started to have second thoughts about High School, which she believed would involve singing.

Despite the stress she had, she still cracked a smile and started laughing. "Oh boy. You are indeed the most insane family in Gravity Falls."

"You better believe it!" All boys shouted. "The five of us will never be tamed!"

Pacifica chuckled, but something stirred in her mind. "Five?" Pacifica counted heads. Three sons, a daughter, and a father. Five, they made up five. "But wait, what happened to-"

Suddenly there was a knock at the door.

"I'll get it." The little one said as he jumped off of Dan's arm and answered the door. "He …. Hellllllloooooooooo!"

Standing at the door was who the boy believes is Pacifica, and Mr. and Mrs. Northwest.

"Hey bro, I mean kid. Am I, I mean is Paci- I mean Wendy here?" Wendy asked the boy, before seeing him drool. "Ooh, forgot to tell her about that one."

"Mom, Dad, and me I mean Wendy?" Pacifica spoke softly as they all went to the door.

"The Northwests?! What brings you here?" Manly Dan asked curiously.

"That." Preston pointed at a rug being brought in by Soos. "Our daughters switched their minds with this to see who have the more stressful life. Which I do not see how, our daughter lives a life of luxury."

"Luxury my butt." Wendy quietly said. "Sup, dad. You keep three axes under the sofa."

"You're right." Dan said, surprised Pacifica knew that. "Well then I guess … wait, what happened!?"

"We switched our minds in order to truly switch lives, just for one day." Pacifica said in Wendy's body. "And I'm saying this now, your life is the most stressful, you win Wendy."

"Stressful?" Dan and the boys asked.

"Oh no, you win big time!" Wendy said through Pacifica's body. "You're parents are from a long line of being bad, and clueless on how to raise a kid! I mean people use bells to train animals!"

"Manly Dan, you use a bell to raise kids, right?" Preston asked Dan, which made the lumberjack to raise an eyebrow.

"I think you need therapy."

Wendy sighed. "Look, we need to …." Wendy noticed her youngest brother glancing at both her and Pacifica confused. "We're switching places now."

They removed their shoes, rubbed their socks to make static, and touched fingers.

"And I'm taking this away now." Soos rolled up the carpet to avoid any shenanigans.

Wendy flexed her arms. "Great to be back …. I still go to high school." Wendy sighed.

"Wendy, I believe we are at an understanding." Pacifica said to her. "We both experience a different kind of stress. We should have a discussion about this later."

"So you're saying you want to hang out with a common folk?"

Pacifica sighed. "Call it what you want …. Why do I feel so tired?"

"Sorry, got absolutely no sleep last night because I have to prepare my wild self for some dinner quests which turned out were breakfast guests, which reminds me."

(Flashback)

Mr. and Mrs. Northwests were both tied to a chair as Wendy was tied to some alter with ten candles lit around in a circle and people in business suits chanting.

"Finally, it is our time to return to our rightful place!" the Freemason shouted. "Thousands of years ago, our society was cast away by Bill for failing him so many times!" One person took out a stone slap with the Llama symbol on it. "But with this, we will revive our master one piece at a time!"

A second member faced Wendy. "Thank you for revealing you are Llama on the Bill Cipher Wheel. Now this slab will be absorbed into your body and soul and we'll sacrifice you!"

"Then once that is done, we will do the same for all ones that united against our lord." A third member said.

"Unless you switched minds with somebody else." A fourth member said. "If we place this slab on you and you're not in your original body, well it will turn to dust and we've failed big time!"

"As in for life!" a fifth member said. "I mean if you've switched bodies, then that's it if the slab turns to dust. It's the only one that exists and there are no replacements!"

(End flashback)

"Then after that failed, they started acting like kids who didn't get their candy and untied us." Wendy said.

"And then Pearl started to shot its ewwww, saliva on them." Preston added with a shiver. "At least that thing's more of a guard dog than our dog."

"And it was so hilarious." Wendy showed Pacifica the pictures she'd took on her phone.

As they both laughed, Preston said one more thing. "They also mentioned they'll be back. So I will inform the authorities and the actual Stanford Pines. I ….. I'm just going to have a relaxing day after all that."

"After all that?" Wendy and Pacifica both said with disbelief.

"Also I promised your daughter, who was in my daughter's body, that I'll buy her car if she co-operated with acting formal to the Freemason who I thought will help us."

Manly Dan raised a finger to ask something.

"Once she received her licenses." Preston turned to Wendy. "And I stated in those videos and recordings that it will be a car and any legal vehicle to drive on public road that is classified as a car, not a tank."

"Hey, I'm just saying. It will be good with fighting giant monsters."

Preston and his wife went into their limo and Soos drove away with the rug.

"Well then." Pacifica said to Wendy. "That …. Happened?"

"I dunno who those mason dorks are." Wendy said. "But I'm sure Bill would be pretty embarrassed if they somehow revived him. So we'll probably just laugh at them when their plans literally blow up in their faces."

Pacifica yawned. "Sure, yeah ….. get away from me you creep!" Pacifica shoved the youngest brother and marched out.

The little one was about to cry, but then took out a picture of Candy and instantly gotten over it.

"You are not going to be creepy on my watch." Wendy took the picture off his hands. "Anymore?"

The boy then shook out dozens of photos.

"You're dead to me."

 **End of Chapter**

 **Mxzfcfzx pibmq clo qbk elrop xka aobxjba xylrq yxzlk. Peb ixqbo illhba rm elt rkebxiqev fq fp xka abzfabp ql ybzljb x sbdbqxofxk. Qeb cxjfiv mofsxqb yrqzebo txp ixqbo cfoba.**

 **A/N:** I'm planning on adding more codes throughout the past chapters. (As of 11/26/2016) Remember, three letters forward.


	37. Twelve

**Chapter 37:** Twelve

In front of a live audience stood a grand stage in a very fancy theater. Voices were heard from the people, eager to listen to a delightful tone. But the voices died down once the darkness overtook the light, except for a single spot lighting shining on the center of the stage.

From the left wing of the stage came tonight's conductor, Mabel Pines, firmly walking to the light with her traditional oversized tuxedo.

"Ahem." She cleared her throat as she wiggled out a baton from her long sleeve and raised her arms. The red curtains opened up as more light revealed the small chorus facing the viewers of this fantastic musical moment.

On Mabel's command, the orchestra began the traditional, public-domain, music for the holiday season.

"On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me…!" Mabel sang with her heart out as she directed the baton towards her annoyed brother, Dipper.

"A Pterodactyl in a stuffed animal tree."

Mabel sung again. "On the Second day of Christmas my true love gave to me…."

"Two awesome people dressed like turtles." Soos sang next to Melody, both dressed like turtles.

"And a Pterodactyl in a stuffed animal tree." Dipper sighed.

"On the third day of Christmas my true love gave to me…"

"Three Basilisks that are actually chicken dragons, not snakes." Melody sang.

"Two awesome people still dressed like turtles, dude." sang Soos.

"And a Pterodactyl in a stuffed animal tree." Dipper sighed.

"On the fourth day of Christmas my true love gave to me …"

"Four shouting parrots." Gideon said with four very heavy parrots on his shoulder.

"Three Basilisks that are also known as cockatrices." sang Melody.

"This awesome couple dressed like turtles right here." Soos sang.

"And a P-tero, I mean a Pterodactyl in a stuffed animal tree." Dipper sighed. "Mabel, this song is too long for-"

"ON THE FIFTH day of Christmas my true love gave to me…."

"Me, meeeee me meeeeeeee!" sang Bill Cipher.

"Four …. Heavy parrots." Gideon said, with struggles of holding the birds up.

"I just really like Harry Potter." spoke Melody.

"Me too." sang Soos. "But boy does it get dark."

"And a Pterodactyl on a stuffed animal tree." Dipper took a deep breath.

"On the sixth day of Christmas my true love gave to me…."

"Six suckers a paying!" sang Stanley flipping through dollar bills.

"Me, meeeee me meeeeeee!" sang Bill Cipher.

"Oh my, these darlins sure eat a lot." Gideon began to sweat.

"My favorite character is actually Professor Snape."

"I miss him, dude." Soos looked downwards with a sad tone.

"And ….. a Pterodactyl on a stuffed animal tree." Dipper rolled his eyes.

"On the seventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me…"

"Seven Gobblewonkers destroying my enemies!" McGucket sang maniacally.

"Six suckers a paying." Stanley sang while throwing money in the air, with one dollar bill being grabbed by Bill Cipher.

"Looks almost like me. Heh heh heh, old times."

"Y-You all can get off now."

"What're your thoughts about the differences between the books and films?" asked Melody.

"Actually I only watched the movies" Soos admitted, with disapproval from Melody.

"Mabel, I don't have time for this!" Dipper said with a higher tone.

"On the …. Gimme a sec." Mabel counted with her fingers. "Eighth day of Christmas my true love gave to me….."

"People?!" shouted Wendy, double checking her lines. "This lady's so-called 'true love' gave her maids milking cows, better be cows. Is this supposed to be slavery?"

"Seven Gobblewonkers destroying my enemies!"

"That idiot bought some dirt for $30! I told him it was Elvis who got vaporized by the government."

"Hey, how'd you know that?" Bill asked.

"Just …. Just get off!"

"Read this." Melody pointed to a page for Soos.

"Wow, the movies just glanced over that part." Soos said in awe.

"I know, right." Dipper said with a smile.

"Sing your line, Dipper!"

"Mabel, nobody else is following-"

"SING IT!"

Dipper took a deep sigh. "And a pterodactyl in a stuffed animal tree."

"On the ninth day of Christmas my true love gave to me….."

"Nine ladies ignoring me." Stanford sighed.

"Ladies? Maids? What kind of holiday is this?"

"I've made them land-mobile!"

"Don't forget to tip me on your way out!"

"I may or may not be still alive!"

"And check this one." Melody said.

"Oh that's why that happened liked that." Soos said.

"W-Wait, you for-got me!" Gideon struggled more and more, but was slowly losing.

"And a pterodactyl on a stuffed animal tree." Dipper folded his arms.

"On the tenth day of Christmas my true love gave to me…"

"Like, Ten very important lords or something." Pacifica said, dressed in a very hideous looking sweater. She was just as annoyed as Dipper, if not more. "Relax, this is just to make up for tossing her artwork in the lake before the contest." Pacifica sighed. "I didn't even see her all day before that."

"I mean, I'm an intelligent individual with 12 ., why is it that every girl I talk to turn me down, even when I'm just asking for directions."

"And now this dude can buy lords?" Wendy asked as she picked up both the Bible and a copy of 'T'was the Night Before Christmas'. "Eh, the Santa one is shorter, and has pictures."

"Hah, they're burning down my neighbor's garage!" laughed McGucket. "That's for always …. Doin' somethin'."

"Why of course refunds exists on this planet."

"You people are so stupid when you draw and write about me. I mean seriously, you think I'm a good guy?" He then glared at the viewer, you! "And I have plans for the human who made that reversed alternate dimension with me as a weak slave." Bill laughed.

"I ….. can't … hold on…"

"But I have to admit, the movie did improve on this."

"The author only listened to the first book, in fourth grade."

"What are you talking about, Soos?" asked Stanford.

"Sorry Other Mr. Pines, I meant _the_ author."

"And a pterodactyl on a stuffed animal tree." Dipper sighed.

"On the … bathroom break!"

(12 silent minutes later)

"I'm back." Mabel walked back on stage. "On the eleventh day of Christmas, my true love gave to me…"

"Eleven rockers rocking!" shouted Robbie as he strummed his guitar and flares shoots out in the background.

"Hey-HEY!" shouted Mabel. "Where's your hand-knitted holiday sweater?"

Robbie folded his arm and acted in his usual goth mood. "I am not wearing that stupid-"

Then Mabel tackled Robbie to the ground and wrestled the sweater on him. "You shall love it!" Mabel returned to her post.

"Like, ten lords of some place."

"Even the trashy ones refuse me. I mean they look lonelier than I do."

"So wait, this old guys have elves make his toys? Oh yeah, that's so slavery right there."

"Yes, eat him! Eat him!" shouted McGucket.

"I conned him almost as good as I conned this guy." Stanley gestured to Bill, who of course still have a bone to pick.

"You ….. you shall eat that guy as 0.0000000000000000001% of your torment inside a retirement home with immortal spoiled brats who'll do everything modern that you hate!" shouted Bill Cipher.

"I need help!"

"J. K. Simmons is making me sad now."

"Why did they have to divorce!?"

"And a … I wrote a fanfiction about those two."

"Me too ….." Mabel sighed along with her brother. "Oooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhh!" Mabel shouted for the grand finale. "On the twwwwwwwwweeeeeeeeeeeelllllllllllllfffffffffffftttttttthhhhhh day of Christmas my true love DYAMI gave to meeeeeeee …"

"Miraculous Lady Bug!" sang Lady Bug and C(h)at Noir.

"Wait, what do you mean he's giving you away, M'Lady … to a …. Another lady?" asked Chat.

"I'm still available unless Dyami takes the hint!" shouted Mabel. "Wink Wink!"

Chat chuckled. "Jealous, M'Lady?" With only a playful rolling of the eyes given as an answer.

"Unless that Adrien Agreste is available." Mabel sighed dreamily.

"I'M THE ONE WHO'LL MARRY HIM!" shouted Ladybug. After a quiet moment, Ladybug looked around, feeling the awkwardness sinking in. "Heh …. Heh …."

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" Chat fainted.

"This is getting weird." Lightning whispered to the other original characters in the audience.

"I've seen weirder." Wind of a Hurricane spoke, moving in his chair to find a comfortable spot. "Wonder when I'm going to be officially introduced?"

"Just as long as you're not ripping off me!" shouted Stanford.

"Someone better not rip me off." Pacifica folder her arms in discuss.

Candy came out of nowhere and glared at the audience. "I'm watching you, goth girl."

"Hey Beethoven." Dyami spoke with Beethoven. "Since this is a non-canon chapter, I just wanted to ask ….. do you think I'm a Gary Stu?"

"Mabel's mine! … wait, you're name's Gary?"

"I want to eat that fat boy." Gloria the shriveled up zombie-like thing said.

"You'll get gas." Her husband, Adolf, said.

"Oh, to fill up the car?"

"Garsh, Darn it!"

"FOCUS!" shouted Mabel. "Ahem, on the twelfth day of Christmas my true love gave to me …."

"Us?" asked Ladybug, holding onto the unconscious Chat Noir. Cat? Chat? I only watched a few episodes, and plenty of fan-comics and fanfiction.

"Eleven rockers rocking." Robbie said in an extreme sweater with lights, sparklers, decorations, and a live petting zoo.

"Heh …. He …. Ahhhh ha ha ha!" Pacifica started laughing uncontrollably from Robbie's sweater.

"I'm going to be single forever!" Stanford broke down on the floor, crying.

"How many days does Christmas have? Don't people say it comes once a year?!" Wendy then checked her phone about the origins of Christmas. "The Catholic Church just threw Baby Jesus's label over that holiday for some old tribe? So that mean it's not his birthday! I'm taking my gift back ….. and some cake."

"Yes, burn! Burn the whole world!" McGucket laughed.

"I'm never going to give this to charity! Suck it Army guys!"

"Poor poor naïve IceBag." Bill folded his arms and shook his … well body in pity. "Just mentioning any Christianity related is going to cause a horrifying comment war that will accomplish nothing. And with each word typed … PETA grows stronger. Hooray! I'm going to send hateful comments to both sides right now!"

Gideon passed out.

"What's going on again?" Melody asked.

Soos shrugged.

"And a …. Pteeeeerrrrrrroooooooodaaaaaactyyyyyyyylllll on a stuuuuufffffed annnnimaaaaal treeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" Dipper sang to the top of his lungs, and collapsed. "Who …. Who wrote that song in the first place?"

"Me!" shouted Bill Cipher. "But really, folks. Feed Peta."

"And that is Mabel's Guide to The Twelve Day of Christmas! Thank you for attending this last-minute written chapter."

Mabel bowed to the audience and the red curtain closed as the booming sounds of applause filled the auditorium.

Until this non-canon universe exploded.

 **End of Chapter**

 **L olnh Pludfxorxv qrz, dqg brx vwloo kdyh wr zdlw prqwkv iru Euhdwk ri wkh Zlogv. Rk, dqg Kdssb Krolgdbv. Wkhuh duh wkuhh pdmru krolgdbv plqxv Qhz Bhdu, uljkw?**


	38. Pie Oh My

**Chapter 38:** Pie Oh My

On a wonderful Saturday afternoon; over at Gravity Falls' famous Greasy's Diner stood a long line leading into the small log-shaped train cart. Why was there a big line you ask? No? ….. You didn't give it a thought as you continue reading this so you would know why? ….. O.K. fine, It was free pie day!

At the counter of the Diner, the waitress of the restaurant, Lazy Susan, appeared from the doorway, holding two trays of pie.

"Does somebody want, piiiiiiiiiiie?"

A musical tone followed suite as she swirled around gave to random people pie. A spot light appeared on her as she inhaled to bless us with a wonderful song.

"Oh piiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiee! Piiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiie! Piiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiie!"

She gave Mayor Tyler, McGucket, Manly Dan, Gideon, and Robbie a full pie each.

"Don't you just lovin some pie'in?"

"Why is she singing?" Gideon asked Manly Dan who just shrugged.

"Pie is so fine it makes me want to not wine." She tossed a try over to Officer Blubs and Deputy Durland.

"This pie checks out A-O.K." Blubs said as the two instantly dig in.

"Pie oh my, I really want to fly!" Susan gave a pie to Tad Strange.

"I really like pie. Especially plain pie."

"Pie, I could die, but that would be a lie." Susan spun around, but noticed her pie display case wasn't spinning. "Spin I say, spin!" she whacked the case, which caused it to start spinning. "Ahem, because if I'm dead, my taste buds will dread."

Susan tried jumping on a chair, but fell over. With some effort, she climbed on herself and showed everyone a slice of pie. "And this little pie of miiiiiiiine is not very shy. Pieeeeeee, ooooooooooh, myyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!"

"Would you stop singing!" shouted a miserable looking man sitting with well-dressed men who looked just as depressed. "It's bad enough we messed up big time, now you have to sing that rough drafted of a song written by some guy who probably can't even tell what a ….whatever those music symbols are called."

"Yeaaaah. What he said." Another person said.

"Think you can sing to make us happy?" another man spoke.

"We are the Freemasons! Servants of Bill Ci-" One man shouted before the others covered his mouth.

"He meant to say Bill …. Bill … Bill sees a pie! His name is Bill and he likes to speak in third person." One said, sweating up a storm.

"Hmmmm." Lazy Susan looked at the mysterious business-looking men with suspicion. "O.K.! But no more yelling, or else …. Wooo ho ho." Susan shivered. "I was going to say I'll get Mr. Greasy out here, but no one ever dares to disturb him."

Susan, the Freemasons, and the residents looked over at a door reading 'Office' on it.

"No one ever sees Mr. Greasy before." Susan said to the Freemason. "Not even I."

One of the Freemason snickered when she said 'I'.

"But everyone knows when he's near." Officer Blubs said as Deputy Durland gotten nervous. "Each step he makes shakes the entire Earth."

"A-A-And when he blinks, the sun b-b-b-b-bllllllinks too." Durland shivered at Blubs comfort him.

"I never seen 'em." Manly Dan said. "But I bet a fight between us will end in a match."

Everyone gasped.

"That is why we must never disturb him." Susan opened up her lazy eye with her hand. "For those who seek him, shall be destroyed."

The Freemasons were intrigued by this Mr. Greasy. They huddled up to discuss something very important.

"So no one ever seen this guy, not even the employees." A short Freemason spoke.

"But then how do interviews work for getting jobs?" asked one of the Freemasons.

"I'm actually more concern about us." Another Freemason spoke. "Do we even have our own names?"

"… I bet this Greasy guy can revive Bill Cipher for us!" One randomly spoke. "With his powers, Bill will recognize us as worthy and together we will rule this dimension!"

"Excuse me fine gents, you do realize we can hear every darn thing you're shouting out?!" Gideon asked as all the townfolks were ready to pummel the Freemason.

"I'm not going to be stoned again!" Susan shouted, which causes some snickers from Nate and Lee.

The Freemasons felt surrounded as they back up to the wall, with the office right next to him.

"This doesn't look good …. Fellow Freemason." One spoke to a leader looking one.

Feeling that they are in for another beating, from humans this time, not a llama, the leader looked at the door.

With determination, the leader held his hand out. "Back away, we shall destroy you with our soon to be knew ally."

Everyone gasped. "Don't do it! You'll just destroy yourself!" shouted Susan, but the Freemason took this as a bluff.

"Too late!" Everyone gasped as the Freemason opened the door, revealing … the broom closet. "Huhhh?"

Feeling confused, Lazy Eye Susan pondered for a while. "Oh that's right. There's no Mr. Greasy, just the shopkeeper right there." Susan pointed at a short woman whacking away a beaver.

Manly Dan as he slapped his head. "Ha, I was actually thinking of myself!"

"Of course." Mayor Tyler said. "But since they threaten to revive Bill Cipher, who we may not speak of again, I hear by say ….. Get 'em. Get 'em!" Manly Dan cracked his knuckles as everyone else gained up to at the Freemasons.

The non-existent camera moved away as the sound of beating took place as pieced of furniture bounced passed Lazy Susan serving pie to Candy and Grenda. "Well all ends that ends. Ha ha ha." She placed the pie in front of the two girls. "So anyway, how you two been?"

"Oh, we were wondering what Dipper and our girl Mabel were up to?" asked Candy.

"Last we heard from an email, Mabel said Dipper was getting popular. Shocking, right." Grenda said as she took a slice. "Also Wendy is being lazy with writing that report."

"Poor girl, she must still be drained from Sunday." Candy took a spit from a glass of water. Candy checked the emails from her phone and found a new one from Mabel Pines. "Grenda, Mabel finally got back to us."

"About time!" Grenda scooched over to see the email. "Let's see what she's been up to since yesterday."

"I love pie." Lazy Eye Susan said randomly. "They're so filling. Don't you just love being filled? So much _filler_ uppers!"

 **End of Chapter**

 **Ixwv Bvb Prpxk lkzb bkqboba Xjbofzxk Fali, xka ilpq. Qeb pmfkkfkd mfb zxpb jlzhp ebo ql qefp axv.**

 **A/N:** The ciphers for past chapters have begun. Keep an eye out for any more that will appear as of 1/18/17.


	39. The Silent Road

**Chapter 39:** The Silent Road

Piedmont is a very populated area (probably), with everyone enjoying the city life as they walk and mingle with one another. There was no real place to find peace and quiet, except for two locations.

The park, which Dipper and Mabel had discovered a few weeks ago, holds some paranormal of its own, just like in Gravity Falls. Even Dipper himself was shocked to finally noticing these things after so many years, especially when a fairy princess castle was behind the bathrooms the entire time.

However the second quiet area is sort of close to the park, but no one actually walk near it in years.

Up the street past the park, passing several wooded areas lie a dirt road with a sign reading 'No Entry' leading straight into the true forest. The road itself was sealed off with a rusted metal gate with a sign on it, but the writing was too warned out to make any sense of it.

No one ever really talk about what's down there. Whether there is something of interest or just ends at the forest, the road does give off an eerie feeling which dispels any person bystanders, but not Dipper and Mabel.

"We've seen worse." Dipper said as Mabel checked out the warned out sign.

"This needs a makeover." Mabel took out a marker and wrote down 'Hooray for Waddles'. "People throughout time will now know Waddles."

Dipper sat in front of the gate to write his Pine Tree journal for their next expedition.

' _And so starts another journey on this late September day_.' Dipper looked at Mabel drawing more graffiti on the sign. ' _With Dyami and Beethoven with us, we will also be exploring with two new students, Jessica and Kimmy_. _This day may bring us nothing, but this is Kimmy's first day in our Paranormal Club, and who knows, maybe Jessica might want to join too._ '

A car pulled in and dropped off both Dyami and Beethoven. "Thanks, Mrs. Grey." Beethoven waved as the others could hear Dyami's mother talking to him.

"Now don't forget you have mosquito repellent for your nature walk. And also bandages, water, your cell phone, call me if you're lost, and don't forget to blah blah blah."

Dyami felt embarrassed that his friends could hear everything.

"And don't just run out all on your own and leave your friends behind. Remember back in Nevada where you left your friends to check out a gila monster and then all those scorpions surrounded them and you had the-"

"Mother, there was a doctor several feet away!" Dyami spoke with a high tone, but quickly quiet time. "I mean, we'll be fine."

Dyami's mom drove off as Dyami glanced over his friends, waiting for whatever comebacks they have.

"She seems nice." Dipper said. "Reminds me of mine and Mabel's mom."

"Eeeee he he he." Mabel pressed on her own cheeks.

"Did she literally say 'Blah blah blah'?" Beethoven asked.

"O.K." Dyami sigh to himself. "So, is everyone here?"

"I'm here now." Jessica jogged up to them. "Dip, Mab, Beeth, Dy. Sup."

"I already took a bath." Beethoven said out loud. "I-I mean a shower."

Jessica placed one fist on her hip and noticed the book in Dipper's hand. "What's that, a diary?"

"It's not a diary, it's a journal … that sounded stupid." Dipper sighed as he showed her the book. "I'm keeping track on our expeditions together. Just like what my Great Uncle did in Gravity Falls, Oregon."

"Gravity Falls?" Jessica asked. "I think I heard of that place."

Dipper smiled and took out Ford's complete journal addition. "Well I happen to have all his recordings in this."

"Really?" She tilted her head. "So what's it about; the wildlife?"

Dipper wanted to show her the book, but on one hand she would probably call him crazy if she sees a single sheet with one of Gravity Falls' strange anomaly that looks too weird to not be made up.

"If you join our club, you can check it out if you want. It's kind of a long read though."

"I'm fine." She folded her arms and leaned on the gate. "So here we are." She looked down the old dirt road with no visible sign of what's ahead. "So are we ready to go?"

"You almost forgot me."

Jessica jolted a bit when Kimmy appeared. "Geeze; scared me there."

"Ha…" Kimmy felt her right arm and glanced at Dyami. "So team captain, are you positive you want to see what's down there?"

"Absolutely!" Dyami jumped over the gate and pointed down the road. "If there is a corner left uncheck, you can count on us to find new discovery anyone else miss!"

"Now that's the energy!" Jessica jumped the gate also, only twice as high as Dyami. She landed perfectly straight next to Dyami and gave a good smirk back to the others. "And don't think I'm going to be a damsel in distress here."

"Woah!" Dipper's jaw dropped from seeing Jessica's amazing jump. "You …. Rock!" Dipper loudly cheered. Jessica snapped her fingers at him, giving the boy rosy cheeks.

"That's nothing; wait till we actually find something down here." She walked onwards as Dyami followed suit.

"Heh heh …." Dipper felt lost in his thoughts, until a certain girl with a happy scrunch face slowly moved in Dipper's view.

"Somebody's getting butterflies in their stomachs."

Dipper quickly shook off his feelings and folded his arms. "Mabel, I was …. Uh ….."

Sensing Dipper's loss of words, Mabel booped his nose and jumped over the gate. She turned around and her happy little face turned into a glare. "Remember, you can only have one." She did the 'I'm watching you' gesture and slowly walked backwards, and tripped on a rock, which unfazed her face as she pick herself up and kept moving.

"Looks like I'm not the only love sick dude here." Beethoven nudged Dipper's arm. "So when are you going to make your move?"

Dipper's face turned red as she stepped back. "B-Beethoven, we just met." Dipper's heart started beating. "B-Besides, we're here on an expedition, not one of Mabel's 'Get Cute Guy to Notice Her' schemes."

Beethoven chuckled. "O.K., but don't let a good catch get away too late."

Kimmy let out a heavy sigh as she folded her arms. "She's just a show off." She walked over to the gate and unhooked it. "Come on, if you really want to see what's down there, I guess I can't stop you now."

Beethoven walked onto the road with a fast pace to keep up with the others, Dipper however felt something off about Kimmy.

"Hey, you O.K.?" The two walked together down the road at their own pace. "If you feel nervous, don't be ashamed. I'll just tell them you're feeling sick, they'll understand."

Kimmy looked away from Dipper's friendly look. "I-I'm fine. Why would you care?"

Dipper was taken back by this. He could tell she probably wasn't use to this much attention, one of those quiet kids nobody talks to, in which he feels more relatable to her. "Well … you're a fellow human, well class mate, and ….." Dipper was caught off guard by her slowly looked at him with those deep purple eyes he hadn't noticed until now. "… and you could be a team mate, and …. And a friend. Wanna be friend….ssss..?"

Kimmy's eyes quickly widened as her face turned a light red and faced away, but she did held her hand out. "….O.K…."

Right before Dipper took the hand, his sister started calling out.

"Dipper! You're getting left behiii ooooooooh." Mabel covered her mouth. "Nevermind, you two take as long as ….. only one girl, Dipper!"

Mabel did the gesture again and walked away.

"Mabel!" Dipper shouted, feeling embarrassed. "That's not what I …aaaargh." Dipper turned around and saw Kimmy still holding her hand out as she looks away, who of course feels twice as embarrassed as he's feeling.

"Sorry about that ….. we should go…."

Dipper and Kimmy started catching up to the others.

"So ..." Kimmy mumbled. "She's teaching you how to pick up girls."

Dipper eyes widened. "Well yes. But this has nothing to do with that." Dipper took a deep breath. "She's helping me get over a crush I had this summer …..which was inevitably doomed to from the start."

"Let me guess, she was one of those 'I'm rich so that must mean your garbage' kinds."

"Oh no no no. My crush is the coolest girl on the planet, not a rich brat unlike someone I know ….. well the rich girl I know is doing better now, and I won't be lying if ….. I mean. The girl I liked sees me as a friend only, one of her best friends, but a friend only."

Kimmy noticed the lower tone in his attitude. "So what's wrong? She likes somebody else."

"Well she used to, but the main thing is she's 15 going on 16."

"Oh." Kimmy looked to Dipper, with a small smile. "You probably did some crazy things to get her to notice you."

Dipper felt his arm nervously, recalling some incidents like the cursed CD and the Shapeshifter. "It's a long story, but we had a good talk about how she sees me as and ….. well in some ways it felt right, but in others …" Dipper took a deep breath. "But after some time, I followed one of Mabel's advice to try to talk to other girls … and then I took my Great Uncle's advice. End up becoming of those heart breakers kind of guy." With guilt still burden on himself, Dipper managed to smile. "But I still at least learned to have more confident."

"Wish I had that." Kimmy said as they got closer to the others. "I don't want to bring up some bad memories right now, let's join the others."

Dipper and Kimmy finally caught up with them as Dyami gave some rules about nature walks.

"Even though many mysteries could be around us, we must remember to never get lost. It is wise to stay on the path in case we run into any dangerous wildlife."

"Like snakes." Beethoven said. "My big brother said that if you see a snake, you cut its head right off, but only if it's poisonous."

"Technically a decapitated snake can still bite." Dyami said.

"Huh?" Beethoven nervously spoke.

"It's best to smash the head with a rock!" He shouted while demonstrating with his fist. "And that whole 'sucking the venom out the bloodstream' is a movie myth." Dyami folded his arms. "Lousy movies."

"Well no snake is gonna bite Mabel today." Beethoven flexed. "With me around, we have nothing to worry about aahhh!" Beethoven screamed as the kids stumbled upon a red fox, which is clearly the same one, eating an indescribable carcass. The fox lift its head up and glance at the children with curiosity and caution.

"I'm gonna call you Gompers the Second." Mabel said happily. "Now if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna throw up over there."

After Mabel's incident, the kids slowly walked around the fox and its meal, and quickly made a dash for it. The Fox watched the kids run off, and then continued to mind its own business.

"Faster faster! Beethoven shouted as the kids kept his pace.

"You know, it was probably already dead." Jessica said. "If foxes are like dogs, they'll eat anything. Even their own barf. Blah!" Jessica gave the throwing up gesture as Mabel giggled.

"Oh." Beethoven stopped, feeling a bit embarrassed. "At least we saved time, and got exercise."

"Well there's that." Dyami said. "But we should reserve whatever energy we have for what may be instore for us."

"Good idea." Dipper took out some energy bars from his backpacks. "Speaking of energy, anyone hungry?"

Each kid took a bar, but Kimmy quietly refused. "I'm not hungry."

"Shoot yourself." Jessica wolfed down the part.

"Woah, forgot lunch?" Dipper asked; who received a chuckle from Jessica.

"Naw, where I'm from, we tend to eat quickly."

"Where was that?" asked Mabel. "Alaska?"

"Not that far away." Jessica said as she held her arms behind her head. "Or was it?" She turned to Dipper. "Say, what's farther? Alaska or the East side of Canada?"

"East coast of Canada." Dipper answered. "So judging that you asked about Canada, I say you're from …. The South Pole."

Everyone burst out laughing as Kimmy just chuckled.

"Oh man." Beethoven said while wiping a tear away. "I didn't think you were stupid."

"That was a joke." Dipper calmly told him.

"Oh … I knew that."

Jessica was the last one to stop laughing. "That was hilarious!" she friendly shoved Dipper, which of course knocked him down. "Dude, sorry."

Jessica handed her hand out to Dipper.

The sweaty boy recalled the first time he met her. She knocked him down, and offered her hand. And like last time, he looked directly into her yellow eyes. His heart began to race as the appearance of her face starts to change.

"..Uhhh, thanks, Wen-"

"Wait, what?" Jessica blinked a few times in confusion as she took a few steps back. "What did you just call me?"

Before Dipper could answer, Beethoven noticed something. "Hey, look!" He pointed above the trees.

"Oh boy…." Kimmy looked gloomy at what Beethoven found as Mabel and Dyami got excited.

Dipper and Jessica both looked to see what looks like the roof of a structure up ahead.

"Woah, we found something …. Wait. What were you saying?" Jessica turned to Dipper.

"I was uhhhh just saying thanks …." Dipper felt like this was one of his usual awkward moments, but he himself can't recall what he was going to say.

"Oh, O.K." Jessica smiled as she turned to the structure. "Anyone know if we're just heading back to town?"

"Shouldn't be." Dipper picked himself up. "According to maps I've read, this should only lead to more wildernesses." Upon realization, a smile on both Dipper and Dyami's face spread.

"Mystery building!" they both shouted.

"I bet there's abandoned robbed bank money in there!" Mabel gleed. "Let's grab 'em before the crooks come back."

"Don't get carried away." The unamused Kimmy said with a sigh. "So you're from Canada?" Kimmy glanced at Jessica as they continued to walk. "Why'd you move here?"

"Ehh, my folks got new jobs." Jessica yawned. "Been traveling place to place beforehand. Grabbing some good grubs and seeing the sites." She then opened one eye at Kimmy. "And what brought you here?"

Kimmy's eyes lit up for just a second. "I've always been here. Just new to the school, that's all."

"O.K. then." Jessica eyed Dipper and Dyami walking more quickly by the second with an ever so cheerful Mabel following behind as Beethoven looked quite excited with a mix of fear as they get closer to the building. "I'd never seen anyone that excited before."

"Just as long as we don't get hurt, things will be fine." Kimmy glanced away from Jessica.

"Rude." Jessica whispered to herself. "So any idea where we're going?"

"Probably nothing too important." Kimmy said with a tremble in her voice. "The most we can probably do is glance around and head back. I don't think they're that interested in seeing a-"

"Woah ho ho!" Mabel shouted at Dipper and Dyami grinned like crazy.

"I should have seen this coming." Beethoven said as they stood in front of an old iron gate, blocking them from a school-sized, three story abandoned building.

"Dipper, are you thinking what I'm thinking?" Dyami slowly turned to Dipper with a grin even creeper than the building's outer appearance.

"Who you gonna call?" Dipper pointed at Dyami.

"The Parnormal Club!" the two shouted.

"Wow; that place sure looks old." Beethoven pushed the iron gates, which only caused them to collapse to the ground. "This place must have been abandoned years ago. Longer than we were born."

"I call dibs!" shouted Mabel as she ran up to the building.

"Mabel, wait for us!" shouted Dipper and Dyami as they ran head.

"You can do this. You can do this!" Beethoven chanted as he walked forward.

Jessica took her time walking up as she gazed at the building. It wasn't anything ancient like you see in movies, it was probably around thirty or forty years old. It definitely looked like some kind of school. She noticed a warned down playground to the left and some old sport equipment lying around.

"Now this is what I'm talking about." Jessica gave a toothy grin. "The perfect place for a horror film, huh Kim?"

Kimmy remained silent.

"Scared?" Jessica stared at the nervous looking Kimmy holding her right arm.

"Y-Y-Yeah. I-I'm fine." She shivered as she looked at the old building. "I-I hope they don't try going in. The place could collapse and-"

"I unlocked the door." Dipper called out to the others as Dyami and Beethoven clapped.

"Nice." Jessica said with excitement. "Come on, let's check out the …"

Jessica and the others looked at the old sign above the door as Kimmy just kept on shaking.

'Perfect Angels Orphanage'

"An orphanage was my third guess." Beethoven said nervously. "Second was hospital, first was the crazy house."

"Crazy house?" Mabel asked. "What's that like? I wanna join."

Dipper laughed. "I'll reconsider if I were you Mabel." Dipper examined the house and glanced back inside. "The place doesn't look that rotten, who's ready for a Ghost Hunt?"

"G-G-G-GHOOOOOOST!" shouted Kimmy as she sat down, shivering.

Jessica started laughing at Kimmy. "Oh man, calm down." Jessica sat down next to Kimmy and gave her a calm pat, which if course was too strong for the goth girl and she stumbled down. "Don't shake yourself up. Trust me; there are no such things as ghosts."

Dipper felt sympathy for Kimmy, and wanted to sarcastically laugh at what Jessica said. "Kimmy, remember what I said, you don't have to come."

Kimmy gave once quick glance at Dipper when she sat up, and then quickly looked away. "N-N-N …..You go on without me." She looked at a large tub at the playground and crawled inside. "I….I'll keep watch …. In a safe place."

"Awwwwwww!" both Mabel and Beethoven said.

"Here, take this." Mabel rush in the tunnel and gave her a teddy bear. "Hug this for three hours straight."

Kimmy gave it a try and the bear spoke. " _There there, Bear Bear_."

"After that, meow yourself to sleep."

"..Me…..Meow myself to sleep?"

"That's the spirit."

"Heh….. I really don't understand."

Mabel dashed back to the others at the main entrance. "Lead the way, Dipper."

Dipper looked up at the old abandoned building. What they may find in there, they may not like, or perhaps it will be nothing. Despite his young age, he did hear quite a lot from people from time to time, but no one ever mentioned this place before.

But in his gut, he can tell this will not be another normal day. He reopens the doors and entered the abandoned Orphanage.

Back at the playground, Kimmy slowly poked her head out form the tube, and the teddy bear also. "I-I-I-I should have gone in with them." She turned back and held the bear tight. "I don't want them to …. Eeerrrrr." She looked at the bear. "What should I do?"

" _There there, bear bear._ "

"You're right. I … I should go to them. But what if …."

" _There there, bear bear._ "

"I'm not being paranoid!" Kimmy shouted at the inanimate object, which she quickly realized that and sighed. "O.K., here I go… any minute now ….. any minute …." She nervously said as she slowly crawl out of the tube. "Just getting myself ready …"

" _There there, bear bear._ "

 **End of Chapter**

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	40. Perfect Angels Orphanage

**For now on, each chapter will have their own ratings.**

 **This one will have a rating of**

' **T** **'**

 **Remember when said not all chapters are going to be happy? Yep.**

 **Chapter 40:** Perfect Angels Orphanage

The kids slowly entered the dark building as Dipper shined a light around. The main room looked like a regular facility entrance with a main desk to the right, some chairs at the left, and the main staircase at the end of the room.

Shining the light around four hallway entrances on the first floor, Dipper would have thought that an orphanage would have been more welcoming than a dentist office, but they must have took their most attractive decoration when the place closed down.

Why was it closed down? They may know soon enough.

"Alright, team. We have just entered an abandoned house." Dipper turned to the others. "Can anyone tell me what is the first thing we should do?"

"See if Kimmy changed her mind?" Mabel asked as she opened the door, spooking Kimmy to hide before Mabel could look out.

"No." Dipper a flashlight to each kid. "We must stay together and not split up like in cartoons. That way we can avoid anything picking us off one by one."

Mabel ignored that last part while 'split up' rang in her head as she glanced at Dyami. "Are you sure? I mean me and Dyami can check upstairs while Jessica goes down that hall and you and Beethoven go straight to the kitchen and end up finding the costume wearing villain."

Dipper rolled his eyes as he points his flashlight down one hall. "That should be a good spot."

They entered a hallway on the left where several dorm rooms on the right side and windows to the left.

Dyami opened each door and found it somewhat furnished with beds, dressers, and a desk. On the first turn, Dyami decided to thermally check one of the rooms and was quite surprised to see folded, dust covered children clothes tuck away in the dresser. "Wow, I thought they just left the furniture here for being too old." Dyami took out a t-shirt with a dragon on it. "I want this."

The kids checked around the last rooms to find more clothing, but nothing else.

"This is weird." Dipper checked around the bed, and realized they still have sheets on them. "It's as if a nuclear leakage happened."

"But no mutants." Beethoven spoke as he found an old baseball mat, but dropped it as he gasped. "Are we contaminated!?"

"Don't get too work up." Dipper calmed him down. "There would be plenty of warning signs and a huge guarded fence of this place is contaminated with nuclear waste."

"That's a relief." Beethoven sighed. "But, then why are these clothes here?"

Mabel checked the size of the clothes. "And all these are kids sized. If they just leave these here, why not toys and books or something. Or a vampire romance novel."

"Well the last one is because they didn't exist back then." Jessica tapped her head. "Since you know; more brain than phone."

Dipper let out a small laugh as Mabel felt somewhat offended.

"Hey, I have you know that I ain't got no phone. Thank you very much."

"Me neither." Jessica folded her arms. "They annoy me."

After checking the rooms out, they made mental notes that all the clothes belonged to boys. Dipper suggested that they've split up the genders from either the left or right side, or the bottom and upper floors of the building.

"So that means we'll eventually come across old girls clothes!" Mabel glee from the thought of throwing a dress-up party. "But wait, why were they left behind?"

Recalling Mabel's question from before, Dipper thought of something disturbing. "Well ….. maybe something horrible happened."

"I should return this shirt." Dyami said to himself.

"Horrible?" Mabel felt her heart beating fast as she walked out the room. "Like what?" Mabel asked as she looked outside at the abandoned playground.

"I think Kimmy had a good idea." Beethoven felt a bit jumpy. "Like maybe there are ghosts here?"

Dyami looked around. He wanted to be excited by this fact, but the thought of spirits of children made him saddened. "I say we check around some more before we jump to conclusion."

"Dyami's right." Dipper said as he points the flashlight down the hallway. "We can't just go with wherever pops into our minds first. I know that from first hand with 'Norman'." Dipper glanced at Mabel, making the girl remember how Dipper thought her first date was with a zombie.

"Well we don't have all day." Jessica pushed Dipper's lumberjack hat down playfully. "We're burning daylight."

Dipper pulled the hat up and smiled at Jessica walking down the hallway, for longer than a second.

"Pay attention to the mission, Dipper." Mabel grinned at her brother as she pulled him down the hall with her.

"There's no such thing as ghosts. There's no such thing as ghosts." Beethoven chanted to himself. "But that's what I used to think about fairies!" Beethoven shivered as he looked at Dyami. He wanted to feel a bit safer with his brave friend/rival, but he looks a bit off too. "D-Dyami."

"Huh?" Dyami jumped up a bit. "Sorry, were you saying something?"

"… I ….. we need to catch up with the others." Beethoven pointed down the hall as Jessica called them over.

"Oh, O.K." Dyami smiled as Beethoven walked ahead, but Dyami gave one nervous look around the sun lit hallway before reaching the others.

After exploring more dorms, they stumbled across the food court that looks more like a school cafeteria.

"Ugh, I would have hated living here." Mabel checked out the tables. "It's like going to school right after school. And eew, chewed gum."

Jessica and Beethoven opened the door leading into the kitchen itself. With no windows around, they aimed their lights to find the place quite neat. Still had that layer of dust like everywhere else, but definitely looks nothing like it came from a slasher film.

"Oh thank gosh." Beethoven sighed.

Jessica looked around the kitchen with curiosity as she examined the old knives in their stand and all the pots and pans neatly stacked into each other. "Yep, this is without a doubt creepy." She examined the untouched pan to find no dents or holes. "They could have still been good all the way back ….. are those copper pipes?" Jessica aimed her light at some pipes on the walls and felt them. "They are, and they haven't been torn out yet? Oh yeah, creep alert."

Dipper, Dyami, and Mabel heard Jessica as they entered the kitchen.

"I don't get it." Mabel asked as Dyami explained how much copper is worth. "Woah … so would it be disrespectful if weeeeeee."

"Unless the gas's still working, then no." Dipper answered her, and that's when Beethoven checked out the burners.

"They still work!"

"Seriously?" Dipper looked at a fridge next to him. "So that must mean …." Dipper opened the fridge, only to instantly regret it. "NOPE NOPE!" Dipper covered his mouth as he shuts the door closed. "That one's definitely doesn't work, and wasn't cleaned out after they closed this place down.

"We're avoiding the bathrooms." They all stated at the same time.

"Jinks!" shouted Mabel. "You all owe me sodas."

"I would have gotten you one anyway." Beethoven said quietly to himself.

"So we have clothes left over." Dyami counted with his fingers. "Gas is still on, but not the electricity and no one actually cleaned up that much."

Dipper shined the light around the kitchen and found something startling. "Woah." Everyone jumped up a bit from Dipper's sudden words, but quickly see that Dipper only found a huge mirror on the wall. He walked up to it and removed it from the wall. "A silver mirror." Knowing this could come in handing, he tuck the mirror in his backpack.

"Looks like we have a little criminal." Jessica turned her head at Dipper.

"Oh you caught me." Dipper smiled. "I always enjoy robbing from mice and cockroaches who work their entire short lifespans to get one of these."

Jessica chuckled and playfully punched Dipper's shoulder.

Seeing that there was nothing left, and thankfully there was no walk-in freezers, the kids exit the kitchen and explored the right side of the house.

There they found more empty rooms with furniture and clothing, but they did however come across a door which looks like an office.

Dipper tried opening it, but the door was locked. He examined the old keyhole and asked Mabel for a hairclip.

"Oh just because I'm a girl, automatically means I have a hairclip in my hair that's not actually doing anything." Mabel placed her fists on her hips and pout. "I have them in my pockets." She smiled brightly and took out a huge pile of hairclips.

"I'm not even gonna ask." Dipper took one and used it to unlock the door.

Upon opening it, they discovered a normal looking office with a few decorative paintings and some filing cabinets, but those were just the normal things, what stranded out the most in that office, was the completely smashed desk right in the center.

"Coooooool!" shouted the excited Jessica as she walked around the desk. "It looks like someone karate chopped it!"

"Heeeeyah!" Mabel shouted as she demonstrated her own karate chop. "Someone must have won the lottery big time!"

Dipper and Dyami examined the desk. There was no way a normal human being could do this, unless if they were anything like Manley Dan, but Dipper did point out that the center was crushed with something that wouldn't be as big as a giant fist.

"So maybe someone used a power tool?" Dyami suggested.

"But what could do that in this room?" Dipper asked. "This desk wasn't anything cheap." Dipper felt the craftsmanship of the desk. "Mahogany? Why would they use this much money?"

Mabel looked at the desk with disproval. "I think I know what kind of story this has."

"You mean like 'Andy'?" asked Beethoven. "I love that movie."

"Me too!" Mabel smiled. "Oooooooh!"

The two began to sing together. "There's always, some other day, some other day! Bet your behind."

Jessica checked the file cabinets. "I can see that happening, but just this desk? Everywhere else looks like meh."

"Maybe it was a donation or an antique back then." Dipper felt the desk examined the empty draws. "Does look older than this building." Dipper stood up and looked at Jessica searching the cabinets. "Find anything good."

"They're empty." Jessica pointed out. "At least they brought the orphans' records with them."

"That's good." Mabel smiled. "I would be curious to see who's an orphan or not, but that's so sad." Mabel placed her hands together. "I should make Mom and Dad a super special breakfast tomorrow."

Seeing that there was nothing left, the kids left the office and explored around some more, they came all the way back to the main entrance.

"O.K., that's the entire first floor covered." Dipper said. "So far we found dorms for boys, the office, the kitchen area, and avoided all bathrooms."

"And we also found a boiler room." Beethoven added. "Thankfully nothing was found in there."

"And the door to the basement was left closed." Mabel said. "Don't want to explore there just yet."

"We'll save that for another day." Dipper checked his watch to see that it was going to 5. "And we don't have much time on our hand. I say we explore the second floor and call it a day."

"Before that." Mabel turned to the door. "I want to check on Kimmy."

"Eeeeh …. Hi?"

They looked at the front door to see Kimmy poking her head in. "Is …. Is it O.K. if I join now?"

' _There There, Bear Bear._ '

They looked at one another and gave her compassionate smiles.

"Of course." Dipper answered.

Kimmy smiled sheepishly as she walked in, with the bear in hand. "Well ….. let's go."

Together they walked up the main steps and checked the hallway to their right.

"So, did you find anything?" Kimmy asked Dipper as she walked closely to him.

"Well apparently when they abandoned the place, they left behind children clothes and some furniture."

"R-Really?" Kimmy asked. "Were they ugly?"

"Not that dragon shirt." Dyami answered. "But I put it back just in case I might anger a spirit."

"Yep!" Kimmy lunged at Dipper's arm. "D-D-Did you guys see any?!"

"Relax, not at all." Dipper informed her. "But for some reason the gas line is still on, and they didn't clean the fridge out."

"Also the office desk was karate chopped in half." Mabel said; which surprised Kimmy.

"Whaaaa? By what?"

Jessica shrugged. "Not an actual karate chop. Unless if it was by me." Jessica placed her arms behind her head. "So they must have got some machine in there."

"And who will go to the trouble of doing that?" Kimmy asked.

"Not sure." Dipper said. "But that's what's an expedition is for."

"Bringing complicating machines inside buildings to smash desk?" asked Beethoven.

Kimmy held onto Dipper's arm tighter. "I wish I was a brave as you."

Dipper blushed from the compliment. "Well yes. I am! Paranormal Expert, right here."

Mabel raised her eyebrows up and down as Beethoven and gave him a thumb up, and then Mabel index finger up and gesture to Kimmy and Jessica with a stern face.

"I heard you the first time." Dipper sighed looked at Kimmy. "But trust me, the worst I've seen on these kinds of trips are …. nevermind." Dipper kept quiet on the last part. "But with only a few odd things, this place doesn't ….. look … that …."

Dipper's heart nearly stopped when he gazed at an open room which looks like a T.V. room, well what's left of it.

Kimmy looked into the room and her face turned so pale she could have easily looked like what she was about to shout. "D-D-D-D"

"Dipper, Kimmy." Mabel asked as the group noticed the two behind them. "What are you two looking at OH MY GOSH!"

Dyami, Beethoven, and Jessica jumped towards them and saw the room they just missed. And just like them, their eyes bulged and their heart slow down as they saw the most horrifying site they have ever laid eyes on.

There, the room that houses a broken T.V., had nearly all its walls stained with something red. They didn't want to believe what came to mind, not by a longshot; but no, something else was in there that confirmed their greatest fear.

All around the room, there were chalk marks, depicting dead bodies.

"Deeeeaaaad! Deeeeeaaaad!" Kimmy dug her head into Dipper's chest. Dipper stood back and held onto her head. He looked back into the room. The chalk marks reminded him of the abandoned convenient store in Gravity Falls, but this was much worse.

"Eh-Kimmy?" Dipper let Kimmy sit next to him besides the doorway. "Just take it easy." He rubbed her shoulder as Kimmy took slow, deep, breaths. "Feeling better?"

"Oh my gosh, there's chalk marks of limbs!" shouted Beethoven which caused Kimmy to hold onto Dipper like a scared cat.

"Ow ow!" Dipper slowly removed his backpack and took out the silver mirror. "Look, I know seeing that was horrifying."

"I think one of them was a kid!"

Dipper scowled at Beethoven, but quickly turned his attention to Kimmy. "But if you still are afraid of spirit, you can hold onto this mirror." Kimmy looked at the silver mirror. "Ghosts can get trapped in here if they float into it."

"How young do you think I am?" Kimmy asked about Dipper's childish sounding words with a stern voice, making Dipper feel sheepish.

"Alright, how about if I just hold onto you for this moment."

"Hm." Kimmy blushed as she looked straight into Dipper's eyes.

Dipper looked into those deep purple eyes as his face gave off heat and his heart started beating faster.

"D-Dipper." Kimmy closed her eyes. "T-T-Thanks." She turned to Dipper's cheek and gave him a quick peck that felt like a jolt of electricity running through Dipper's body.

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

"MABEL!" The deep red faced Dipper shouted to his overly happy sister as Kimmy just covered her eyes in embarrassment.

"Believe me, if Weirdmageddon didn't happen, I would still be petrified by that." Mabel pointed to the blood stained room. "But really … that's a thing."

Kimmy turned away as everyone gazed back into the room.

"So then…" Jessica then clapped her hands together. "I say we do a séance!"

Everyone was a bit surprised by Jessica's sudden command.

"Nnnnnnnn-OPE!" Kimmy practically jumped into Dipper's lap and hugged him tighter.

"I….can't …. Breath….."

Kimmy's eyes widen and realized where she's sitting. She jumped right up and felt her right arm in embarrassment. "Sorry! Sorry! Sorry!"

' _There There, Bear Bear_.'

Dipper stood up and took a deep breath. "Kimmy. You do not want to be here anymore, right?"

Kimmy noded her head.

"How about I walk you outside to the playground. I'll come back to do a quick séance, and then we can all go home together. Sounds good?" Dipper held his hand out.

Kimmy looked away and grabbed his hand. "O.K."

Together Dipper and Kimmy slowly walked away hand in hand as Mabel just grinned till her heart content. "OMG! I can't believe this is happening!"

"I know." Dyami smiled. "We're doing an actual séance at an actual murder scene …." Dyami's smile slowly faded. "Maybe we should check to see if Dipper packed holy water."

"I'm on it!" Beethoven quickly dug through Dipper's backpack and took out the journal volume.

"No, I meant what you see there!" Mabel held onto Dyami's face and turned him to Dipper and Kimmy walking away hand in hand. "I'm going to call it Dimmy. No wai, Kipper!" Or Ipperimmy! ….IMMYIPPER!"

Jessica chuckled at the scene, but noticed the journal volume right next to her feet. "What do we have here?" Jessica picked up the journal and opened it. Curiosity caught her eye as she skimmed though the reports and well-drawn pictures of Gravity Falls' fantastic (and some stupid) creatures and relics. "Where did Dipper get this?" Jessica looked through the Journal #1 section and found goblins, land sharks, a hockey player with a weed hacker, terrible rip-offs of bigfoot, some deer monster eating a human, flesh eating electric bills, and instructions on how to do a séance.

"Sweet." Jessica grinned as she saved the page and looked through more pages.

Mabel turned around and noticed Jessica looking through the volumes. "Oh, be careful with that." Mabel said. "That there is 100% Pines' property."

"Lucky you!" Jessica grinned as she showed everyone the séance section. "And lookie what I found."

The kids looked at the séance instructions and Dyami was quite impressed. "Stanford Pines you are a genius." Dyami turned to Beethoven. "Find any holy water?"

"I found a squirt gun filled with holy water." Beethoven held onto the water toy. "Any ghosts come and threaten us, they have another thing coming."

Mabel looked at the silver mirror and smiled. "I call shield!" Mabel picked up the mirror as if she was knight.

Dyami reached for his whip, but just remembered he left that at home. "And … I have my quick wits!"

Jessica grinned at everyone's determination, yet noticed the slight fear in Beethoven. "Alright, all we need now is Dipper."

"I-I'm here." Dipper slowly waved at them. "Sooooo, let's get this-"

"How was it?!" Mabel instantly jumped towards her brother and bombarded him with questions. "Did you kiss? Did you set up a date? Can I plan it?"

Dipper's face returned to that deep red shade as he backed and waved his hands. "Wait, wait! I-I!"

Jessica nearly fell over from laughter. "You're-You're face!"

Dipper just pouted there for a good moment before Jessica calmed down.

"O.K., O.K., I'm good." Jessica held up the journal volumes. "Hope you don't mind me checking this out."

"Uhhhhh." Dipper looked at the volume. "Not at all. So then, shall we get this started, guys?"

In truth, they were both excited and nervous about all this, well Jessica is excited only, the rest already had experience with the paranormal.

Dyami, Mabel, Beethoven, and Jessica sat together as Dipper closed the door. Using a flashlight, he carefully made his way between Mabel and Jessica.

"Wow, you're hand has a good grip." Mabel smiled at Dyami.

"Good to have finger strength, ow ow ow!" Dyami looked at Beethoven. "Even Beethoven's strong."

"I should be holding her hand." Beethoven whispered to himself.

"Well Dipper, do the honors." Jessica smiled at Dipper, who took noticed.

"Oh, alright. Here we go."

Dipper turned the flashlight off and closed his eyes.

"Oh spirits from beyond the grave, speak to us."

The room was silent.

"We call you here. What happened here? Why did these people die? Who did this?"

Everyone was getting excited. Mabel grinned as she felt Dyami's grip getting tighter, Dyami feeling both excitement and sorrow for what these people may have gone through, Beethoven panicked, and Jessica just relaxed.

"Departed ones." Dipper spoke quietly. "Please come to us, we seek answers."

"Me too you darn kids." Spoke an unknown voice.

Everyone gasped and remained silent.

"It worked!?" Dipper asked. "Uuuuuuuhh….. what do I do! What do I do?!

"Why are you asking me?" Mabel asked. "You're the one that took care of those two old people ghosts and the one haunting Pacifica's mansion."

"Oh oh, right." Dipper took a deep, uneased breath. "S-S-Spirit. Who are you?"

"My name, is that what you want to ask?" The voice appeared male, with a calm tone. "But first, where am I?"

"You're in Piedmont, California." Dyami answered, keeping calm as they communicate with a ghost, a live ghost …. Well an actual ghost. "I am Dyami Grey, these are my friends."

"I-I-I-I'M BEETHOVEN!" Beethoven shouted as if his heart will give in any moment. "DON'T HAUNT US!"

"This is so cool!" shouted Jessica. "I thought this was going to be some weird game; but look at us, we're talking to an actual ghost!"

"I'm a ghost?" the male spirit asked. "Well I be darned."

"Awww, he thinks he's still alive." Mabel felt pity for the ghost. "My name is Mabel Pines. My brother Dipper and I want to help you."

"Mabel and Dipper Pines?" asked the spirit. "Why if it isn't the two kids that stopped Bill Cipher."

Mabel gasped loudly. "We're famous in the spirit world!"

Dyami and Beethoven were also intrigued, they heard stories from the twins about Bill Cipher and how he was defeated, and felt they deserved a huge reward from the world.

Beethoven took this as an opportunity. "Say, when you get back, tell all those ghost boys that Mabel is taken."

Mabel gave the biggest grin the darkness could hide. "He ships me with Dyami." She quietly whispered.

"Bill who now?" Jessica asked.

"Yes, Bill Cipher's end of life." The spirit spoke more. "I was traumatized when I was a part of his thrown.

"….Wait a minute." Mabel turned her flashlight on and aimed right behind Beethoven.

"Aaaaaah!" Beethoven covered his eyes to shield himself from the look of the murdered spirit.

Mabel's jaw dropped as she saw the face of their visitor. "Tad Strange!?"

Standing right with them, was none other than Tad Strange, the most normal person in Gravity Falls who turned out wasn't a ghost at all, or a dream demon.

"Yes, I do have a pulse." Tad checked his neck. "Last thing I remember was walking into a port-a-potty and randomly ended up here." He placed his hands on his hips and smiled. "Well I should go find a bathroom then, is there one nearby?"

"I wouldn't risk it." Mabel answered him as they showed him out of the dark room.

"….. I give, what was all that about?" Jessica asked everyone else, who all just shrugged.

Jessica looked out the window to see the sun beginning to setting. "Well despite how many questions I have, I need to leave. Don't want to walk around here in the dark." Jessica walked ahead and waved. "I'll see you around. Especially you, Mr. Dipper Mystery."

Dipper eyes lit up. "Oh, well I'll-"

"Hey wait!" Mabel shouted at Jessica. "You still have the journal."

Jessica turned around and looked at her hand. "Oh …. Forgot about this." After looking at it for a few seconds, she handed it back to Dipper. "I actually really liked what's written here, whether it's full of baloney or not." She nudged the boy playfully. "If you're not going to be kissing Kimmy too much, we should hang out."

Dipper's face turned red again as he was lost of words.

"See ya." She winked at him and made her way to the stairs.

Dipper continued to stare as Mabel checked his eyesight. "Yep, somebody's in loooooooooove!" Mabel gave herself a hug. "But who will win Dipper's heart at the end? Jessica the cool girl, or Kimmy the shy one who likes Homework the Game? … Pacifica?"

Dipper snapped out of it. "Yeah. Sooooooooo we should head back. We don't want to make our p-parents worried."

"Actually we still have like thirty minutes of daylight." Dyami pointed out. "I just texted my parents, they'll pick us up after our 'nature walk'."

"Is that a bad boy side I see?" Mabel quickly asked.

Dipper scratched the back of his head. "I'm not really feeling it right now. You know, being traumatized and all."

"I'm with you, buddy!" Beethoven held onto Dipper with his arm. "Wait, we're buddies now, right?"

"Eeeeeeee-Yes?" Dipper said; which gave a teardrop in Beethoven's eyes.

"Buddy….." Beethoven gave Dipper a brotherly hug which could easily suffocate anyone.

"Awwwwww." Mabel said. "Isn't this great. First he was a bully, but now he's friends with Dipper." She leaned close to Dyami. "Not technically a real bully."

Dyami did not respond.

"Dyami?"

Dyami jumped at Mabel's question. "Y-Yes?"

With her Mabel senses tingling, she knew there was something up. She looked into Dyami's unsettling eyes. "Are you O.K.?"

Dyami looked directly into Mabel's eyes. For the short amount of time he'd known her, he knew far too well that there was nothing to hide from her, and she is quite persistent.

"Truthfully, I've been having this horrible feeling the second we walked into this building."

"What do you mean?" Mabel asked, before gasping at the first thing to pop into her head. "Are you psychic?! Who do I marry?"

"….Actually, ever since I was 5, I always wondered that. I get déjà vu a lot and-" Dyami smile faded. "I mean, I felt like we've were being watched."

"Really?" to make sure, Mabel called out. "Anybody watching? Hello, … Lightning? Are you and your fairy gals here? …. Tad, still here?"

"I am lost." Tad voice could be heard from somewhere.

Dyami rubbed the back of his neck. "Like Dipper said, I didn't want to jump to conclusion, but I think that room just spells it out." He looked at Beethoven still hugging Dipper as the poor boy was squirming out. "I think this place really is haunted."

Mabel looked back towards the blood covered room. "Yeah, I mean Dipper told me that anyone who died tragically or has huge unfinished business usually stay around, like that ghost that wanted the Northwest to let the common folk into their fancy party."

Dyami nodded his head. "And you said no one mentioned anything that happened here before, right?"

"Yep, but we're still kids. Why tell us about a huge murder?" Mabel asked. "I bet this didn't get solved."

"Or avenged." Dyami pointed out. He looked down at the blood stain on the floor. "And all those chalk marks. So many people died, who or what could …. Do ….. such a ….." Dyami looked at the bloodstain and saw it leading down the hall farther.

Mabel also noticed this and her eyes widened. "Dipper, Beethoven."

"Yes my love, I mean Mabel?" Beethoven dropped Dipper on the floor.

"Look!" Mabel pointed at the blood trail leading down the hall.

"…. Yeah, I think we really should call this a day." Beethoven started to sweat as Dipper stood up and felt his head.

"What did I miss?"

Dyami looked at the blood trail, he didn't know where it would stop or what was dragged there, but his spirit of curiosity overthrew his negative emotions.

"Friends, come. I think part of our destiny lies at the end of this trail!"

"Oh Dyami." Mabel sigh dreamily as the two ran ahead.

"I really need to attend speech classes." Beethoven jogged down the hallway to catch up with the more energetic kids

Dipper stood up and saw the other kids running ahead. "H-Hey, where are you guys going?" Dipper made a left turn down the hall and caught up to see all three kids standing still. "What's going ….. w-w-what?"

Dipper and the others just stood there too see the blood trail end at another chalk drawing, of a child.

Mabel's stomach began to sink as she held onto the arms of both Dyami and Beethoven. "I …. I think we should go home."

Dyami was having second thoughts about all this, but noticed the door next to them on their left. It was another dorm, but the door to this one was vandalized.

Dyami held onto Mabel's hand tightly as he slowly made his way to the door. It looked like it was done by bullies, but the words on this door wasn't anything simple and childish like what Beethoven might think up.

"I ….. I think whoever this was…" Dyami looked at the chalk mark. "This was their room."

Dipper looked at the door and back to the others. "….. we should just …"

Dyami quickly grabbed the handle and took a deep breath. "Everyone …." He turned to the others. "I don't think we'll like what we'll find in here."

"Then …. Then shouldn't we just leave it alone?!" Dipper asked in a harsh tone.

Mabel turned to her brother with confusion. "Dipper, you're usually the one on top of things." She looked at her brother. "In your own dorky way. Are you feeling alright?"

Dipper felt his head. "Not really."

Mabel felt his forehead. "You don't have a fever, but you do feel cold." Mabel felt worried for her brother. "Come on, Dyami and Beethoven, we should take Dipper home." She gave her brother a hearty smile. "And I'll make you my famous Mabel Chicken Noodle Soup you love so much."

Before Dipper could say anything else, Dyami just threw the door right open.

The sudden event shocked the kids as Beethoven covered his eyes.

"Find happy place, find happy place."

Dyami closed his eyes as he nervously aimed his flashlight into the room, feeling a new lever of fear in his soul.

Dipper and Mabel were the first to look into this room. "Guys…"

Dyami and Beethoven opened their eyes and looked where the light revealed. There was no blood, no bodies, no chalk marks, not even some ritual shrine.

Instead it was another room, but not as common as the others.

Dyami felt his fear lighten up as he aimed his light around and found it to be decorated with posters of different movies. There were even some super hero models around a shelf. Dyami aimed the light around the ground to see that the dorm has two beds instead of one, with many boardgames underneath. Seeing nothing else, he took a deep breath and calmed himself.

"…..Heh….. I expected something …."

"Traumatizing beyond imagination?" Beethoven answered.

"Yes." Dyami chuckled as the kids looked around the room.

"Woooooooow!" Mabel smiled as her fear plummeted. "This is all the nerd stuff you like, Dipper! Minus the paranormal." Mabel walked around the short room. "Hey, candles!"

Mabel took out a match and lit some decorative candles around the shelves to help bright up the room some more.

It was indeed what Mabel will call a 'Dork Room'. Whoever had this room clearly likes movies, super heroes, and even some monsters. "I'm not that big into these kind of things, but they still look good after all these years." Dyami said as he checked out some figures on a shelf behind a bed.

"Hey, Mothgad!" Mabel pointed out a poster as Dyami found a sheet of paper on the bed. "I love that movie and the two singing small ladies."

"I actually remember that song sort of." Beethoven said.

And the two started singing together again as Dyami paid close attention to the sheet. "Mooooo-thg-aaaaad! Moooa-thg-aaaaad! ….. Unknown Language we don't know how to look up!"

Mabel stopped her singing with Beethoven when she noticed Dipper shivering. "Bro, you don't look so good."

Dipper closed his eyes and felt his head again. "Sorry, it's just, I-we should really get out …. uuuuuurrrrh." Dipper sat down and felt his stomach.

"Dipper!" Mabel jolted to her brother and checked his head. She gasped when she felt his temperature rising. "That's it! We're leaving now!" Mabel said as Beethoven began to worry. "Dyami, call your mom. We need to get Dipper some chicken soup now."

Dyami did not respond.

"Hey, Dyami! I said now!" Mabel glared at Dyami, but noticed the sheet was looking at. She walked over to him to get his attention, but was surprised by the frozen state of his face.

"Dyami, what are you …." Beethoven looked at the sheet. After short moment, his eyes widened and his jaw slowly dropped.

"Guys?" Mabel was curious and looked at the sheet itself. She was quite astonished by how well designed it was. She looked at the images closes to see they were all done with paint. But the words written on what caught her attention the most. She slowly read through the letter out loud.

'In memory of my only real friend.'

'I can't believe I lost you and now stuck with these horrible people. Each day they're becoming more and more terrible. I've seen beatings, yelling, blood. I was no exception.'

'I cannot even think of what else to say, but I have a feeling that …. That something more terrible than your death will happen. I just know it.'

'To the one that actually truly cares about a weakling like me, I hope to see you in that better place.'

Mabel covered her mouth. "Someone lost their friend, and this place….." Mabel recalled the vandalized room and the very name of this building.

"This isn't perfect at all!" Mabel said, before remembering her current dilemma. "Oh my gosh, Dipper. Are you-" Suddenly Dyami grabbed her face.

"Ugh, seriously? You want to kiss me now!?" Mabel asked angrily. "My brother is sick and I just read a sad memorial? Nothing about this looks romantic in the-"

Dyami face remained still as he tilted head to the bottom of the words.

There was a photo of the supposed dead friend with a death date of about 40 years ago.

"Wow, I didn't even notice this photo." Mabel's looked at it with puppy dog eyes. "Awww. Sooo adorable! Why do good people have to ….."

Behind the kids, Dipper was sitting next to the door, feeling his head. "Oooooh, I hope we leave before …"

"D-D-D-D-Dipper?" Dipper slowly looked at his sister. Usually in the dire of situations, she held her anxiety in check. But by the look of her constant shaking body and her trembling mouth, she looked as if she'll go crazy at any second.

"W-W-We found this photo of a kid who died in the 70s. I-I think you need to look at this."

Mabel slowly handed the photo to Dipper. As he gazed into the child's face, his hands began to tremble.

.

.

.

She looked exactly like Kimmy.

Dipper's dropped the page as his breath was taken away. Despite his state, he slowly picked himself up with the door handle as support. "You ….. You…"

Dyami nodded his head. "I had a feeling we were being watched. And Kimmy's behavior all day ….."

"SHE WAS A GHOST THE ENTIRE TIME!" screamed Beethoven. "She went to school since day one! And she was dead! Dead!" Beethoven held his head. "Happy place! Happy place!"

Dyami felt his beating heart. "She was a phantom. I failed to notice."

This was a huge shock for Mabel, not nearly as close to Stanley's secret, but still a huge shock. "Dipper, do you think she went back to school and hung out with us because ….." Before she finished that sentence, she remembered that cute moment she shared with Dipper. "Ghost Girlfriend!" Mabel randomly shouted. "Dipper, we need to find Kimmy and have you two make out!"

"WHAT!?" shouted Beethoven and Dyami.

"Come on, bro!" Mabel grabbed Dipper's hand, but the boy pulled it back.

"Huh?" Mabel tilted her head as Dipper slowly lowered his. "Are you ….. right. You're still sick."

"I am sick." Dipper took a deep breath. "Sick of this again?"

"Again?" Mabel asked.

"What _did_ happen at Gravity Falls?" Beethoven asked, completely confused and shocked.

"What are you ….." A lightbulb sprang up in Mabel's head. "Oh I get it. She died in the 70s, those making her far older than Wendy."

Dipper tightened his grip on the doorknob.

"If she was still alive, she would be like 50, but she's still young in heart." Mabel held her cheeks. "And you have so much in common! You like these movies, and you both like Boring, Boring, and More Boring! Ooooooooh, she said she hadn't played in years! I get it now! And how sarcastic she was when I tried to scare her by saying 'boo'! I love foreshadowing!"

"Mabel ….."

The two other boys stare at Mabel's weirdest behavior yet. "And after you get ice cream, you can sing a song in the rain and get a cold, and I'll give you both chicken noodle soup and you'll be together forever and-"

SLAM!

Mabel, Beethoven, and Dyami all jumped when Dipper shut the door behind him and sat down. "You don't understand at all. This will never work like that!"

"Oh sure it will." Mabel grinned at her hopelessly in love brother. "You just need to say 'Hey ghost babe. I'm a paranormal investigator. Wanna kiss.' That's line's perfect!"

"Mabel, how crazy are you?" both Beethoven and Dyami asked.

"Fun crazy!"

"I said it will never work!" Dipper said in a harsher town. "Ahhhhh." Dipper felt his head.

"Dipper!" Mabel kneeled and felt Dipper's head. She pulled right back in fear. "You're burning up!"

"It won't work….."

"Calm down. We'll get you come right."

"I'll never be loved."

Mabel gasped. "Dipper, where is this all coming from. Of course you will."

"No, it would never work ….. Dipper will never accept me."

The three's eyes widened. "….Dipper. I think you had a little type-o there. You were supposed to say Ki-"

Without warning, Dipper grabbed into Mabel's arm and started squeezing it.

"Ow, Dipper! What are you doing!?"

Dipper didn't respond. He only cracked his neck and frowned. "You should have kept your eyes on the both of us before I came back for that séance." His body flashed as he twitched. "He cannot know what I am!"

Dipper face looked up and the three kids screamed, at a dead face of Kimmy.

 **End of Chapter**

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* * *

 **A/N:** And so here we are. Soon it will be a full year since Gravity Falls had ended, and the beginning of my most popular fanfiction of all 'Until Next Summer'

As of last chapter, my story had received over 100 favorites and over 50,000 views. I like to thank you all so much, but a special thanks to these two…

CRSTO20 and Amethyst-Ocean on deviantart.

CRSTO here created an OC Bio of Dyami Grey and had Amethyst-Ocean posted it. I highly suggest checking it out and support the two.


	41. Tormented Spirit

**Rated T for horror imagery, violence, and blood**

 **Chapter 41:** Tormented Soul

"So, you think this Kimmy girl is cute?"

"Well … yes. I mean those eyes ….. and she actually likes Dungeons, Dungeons, and More Dungeons!"

"Sweet, dude. I would have fallen asleep the moment you started talking in outdated English."

"Yeah, Grunkle Ford's the only one that plays with me. But since he's half way across the world, Kimmy and I can play as much as we want."

"Oh maybe all day, or all week. Heck, how about forever!"

"Woah there, I'm pretty sure Kimmy has a life."

"Eh, I'm sure she won't mind. Maybe you can give her chocolates, hold hands, and smooch a lot."

"But-But-, we and she, cute. I mean, we …. Only just met."

"Naw, go for it! Kiss her, kiss her."

"I-I-I."

"And as Mabel will put it; wrap yourself up in tape or whatever she does. Then you can be together and no bad people will bother you ever again."

"…I think I'm dreaming right now …. Yeah I don't remember how I got into this conversation with you, Wendy. And I don't remember you looking like Wendy from Peter Pan."

"…. Correct, this is a dream …. Keep sleeping, it's not even passed midnight yet."

"… Yeah sure, why not. Say, is this a lucid dream?"

"Yes ….. do stuff now."

"O.K. ….. how about super human strength?"

"Cool. Here's a dummy. Pretend it broke Kimmy's heart."

"Looks like I still deserve the 'Get Over Wendy Now' treatment."

* * *

"GET OUT OF MY BROTHER'S HEAD!" Mabel shouted at the dead girl-faced monster with the body of her brother Dipper.

This happened only briefly, but it appears that Dipper is being possessed by Kimmy, a ghost that had well-hidden her true nature up until now.

Mabel was struggling to free herself from Kimmy's grasp, but she couldn't manage to break free.

"What are you doing with my brother and how did you improve his noodle arms so much!?"

The dead, soulless looking corpse face of Kimmy slowly looked at the distressed Mabel and gave her a horrid smile. "I'll give you a hint, he's not here. Mwa ha ha AAAAAAAH!"

Suddenly Kimmy was sprayed with water from the water gun used by Beethoven.

Kimmy screeched like a banshee and released Mabel as Kimmy began to melt, along with Dipper's body.

"Uhhhhhhh." Beethoven's heroic moment was shot dead the moment there was nothing left as Mabel looked around.

"Dipper? … Dipper? …. DI-"

"DIE!" All the candles went out as the ghostly face of Kimmy appeared with bloodshot eyes crying tears of blood. "Why would I possess him now and bring him close to you?" She let out a long laugh as her tongue stuck out and reached the floor. "I can create a physical appearance and shapeshift into others for a short time, but you ….. you all just had to come here ….. you just had to learn the truth!"

She quickly vanished as the three kids were left in the dark.

They just quietly stood there. Patient for anything else Kimmy will throw at them, until Beethoven finally lost it.

"I gotta get out of here!" He ran ahead, only to stumble into someone. "Ghost!"

"It's me, Dyami!" Dyami shouted as he stood up. He took out a flashlight and aimed it at his face. "See. Your good friend Dyami." He began to move it towards Beethoven. "Now let's calm down and AAAAH!"

The light aimed at Beethoven, but only revealed to be Kimmy with Beethoven's body.

"Gotta again! We ha ha ha SCREEEEE!" Kimmy covered her face as Beethoven jumped in front of her and spray her again with holy water.

"Stand back! I have a water gun loaded with Holy Water!"

"H-Holy water?" Kimmy returned to her normal looking appearance and glared at Beethoven, shivering the bully to the bone. "I shouldn't …. Get hurt from something like that." She floated into the air and glanced at everyone like a doll. "The only bad people alive now are the ones that will take my chance of happiness away, you three!"

The door began shutting as Kimmy gave off a haunting glow.

"But in this place, evil is reward."

She tilted her head as a smile grew across her face. "Speaking of reward, how about a fun game?" She floated upside down and held out a sphere of light. "All you have to do is reach the main entrance before the sun sets completely." She lowered the sphere as it slowly evaporates. "You win, you get to go home and bring Dipper." She floated near Mabel's face and showed off her sharp teeth. "If I win …. You three get to never come here again. That's right." She held up three fingers. "You three."

With that, she vanished and the door shut tights.

Mabel and the others were just frozen by what they've just witness. It took her a while, but Kimmy's voice echoed around her head as she finally processed the danger. "Dipper's in the hands of a crazy girl! The wrong kind of crazy!" Mabel reached for the doorknob. "We have to get him back!" Before she opened the door, she pulled both Dyami and Beethoven by their shirts.

"Dyami, no distracting me!"

"Yes, ma'am." Dyami answered sternly as Mabel's eyes of determination helped clear his mind, even though he doesn't know what she means exactly.

Beethoven usual first instinct this this situation is fear, but not now. "Mabel….." Beethoven held his squirt gun to his chest and salute. "We will find my buddy and … hey! That was Kimmy who pretend to be Dipper back there! I thought me and Dipper are bud-"

"CAN IT!" Mabel shouted as she pulled the door open. "We are going straight to the main doorway, beat Kimmy, and get my brother back!"

The three kids yelled as they ran out of the door and walked into the … cafeteria?

"What the!?"

In just a split second, they were already on the first floor, but in the wrong room.

"But but." The three turned back to the door and found it to lead straight to the kitchen. "What the heck just happened?!"

* * *

"OOOOOOOH YEAH! This is awesome!" Dipper on the other hand was flying through the bright sky without a care in the world.

He flew pass the white clouds, around some airplanes, and gently floated among the birds.

"Can this day get any better?"

"Hello."

Dipper looked to his left and saw a shy Kimmy flying alongside him.

"K-Kimmy?" Dipper looked at her. "What are you doing here?"

"This is ….. eerrr ….. a Dream Date."

"D-Dream Date?!" Dipper turned red. "I … you know what, this is my dream. I need to like girls my own age. Nothing to worry about, just wing it." Dipper flew over and grabbed Kimmy's hand, causing the girl to yelp real quick. "Sorry, didn't mean to scare you."

Dipper was about to pull away, but Kimmy held onto Dipper's hand tightly. "NO …. This is fine…"

Dipper sheepishly smiled as he looked down to see an island. "Hey, let's go explore there."

"Sure, everything you want …. That I'm O.K. yet." She glared at Dipper.

"I'm not that old enough to know what the heck you're talking about ….. almost."

* * *

"Three for the charm ….. the boiler room?!" Mabel, Dyami, and Beethoven entered the old boil room with a large furnace connected to the brick wall, some pile of coal and wood, and a chained up exit in the rear. "First we walked into the cafeteria, then it was that office, not here again?!"

Mabel called out to her brother and his scary stalker, but no answer.

"Where are you, Bro-Bro?"

Beethoven patted Mabel on the back. "Don't give up, we'll find him." He whipped out the squirt gun. "Remember how she acted when we found her secret?"

"Uh-huh." Mabel nodded.

"She got tired." Beethoven looked at the back door as Dyami examined some coal. "She can't keep this up forever. All we have to do is keep doing this and-"

Then the door burst into flames.

"She's on to us!"

Dyami dropped a piece of coal he was examining, but then it and all the other coal flew into the furnace and it lit up like a volcano. A large coal arm reach out from the furnace's vent and slowly pulled itself out to reveal a 10' tall, flaming coal humanoid with a burned skull as a head.

Faster than the kids could scream, the monster jumped towards Dyami with great speed, but before he could grab Dyami and burn him alive, Beethoven quickly acted and squirted holy water into the beast's mouth.

Mabel looked around swiftly and spotted a fire extinguisher. "Eat …. Whatever this white foam is made out of!" Mabel aimed the fire extinguisher at the monster, but nothing came out. "Huh?!"

(Fun Fact: Fire Extinguishers only last for about 5 to 15 years. This is due to the seal on the neck weakening over time which allows the pressure to be release)

Out of frustration, Mabel threw the extinguisher at the monster, only for it to poof out of existence.

"….What just ….." After seeing the monster just vanishing like that, Dyami took a cardboard box and threw it at the flaming door. Nothing happened to it.

"Were …. Were we ever in any-"

But apparently Kimmy is more of a trickster then they thought and the flame grew more violent and turned the box into ashes.

"This is not good!" shouted Dyami. "She can create both illusions and real danger. We may not be able to tell what is safe and what is not."

Mabel pondered, and came up with something. "But I on the other hand have the solution to our problem." Mabel tossed a ball of yarn in the air. "I'll just throw these bad boys at whatever comes in our way and they'll go poof!"

"I don't think these are hard enough." Dyami took a ball of yarn and tossed it in the air. "But if the visions are that weak, just make sure they go poof." Dyami informed her. "You saw those flames. She can turn them real in a split second. But still, this newfound information could lead us to Dipper quickly, especially when we're tiring her out."

Beethoven found some cutters and opened up the rear door. "Come on, I need to know if we're buddies or not!"

* * *

"Darn it, they keep …finding out about stuff."

"You say something, Kim?" Dipper asked his date.

"Mh, no. I'm quiet all the time, just like you." She held her arms behind her back and gave a sheepish smiled.

The two were exploring a tropical island together and were on the trail of an elusive animal.

"You hear that?" Dipper heard a twig snapping. "We're must be getting close."

"Not as close as them." Kimmy said to herself, before Dipper grabbed her hand. "Shhhhhh." Dipper quietly lead her to the animal, while Kimmy's dead heart began to race.

" _He's holding my hand again! He's holding my hand again!"_

Dipper and the anxious Kimmy poked their heads out to see a beautiful and extremely tall bird pecking at the ground.

"It's beautiful….." Kimmy said in awe at the majestic animal pecking the ground in its natural habitat.

" _Don't say the cliché! Don't say the cliché!"_ Dipper mentally repeated to himself. "Not as beautiful at you. DARN IT!"

"I-I-I…I-I-I…." A red shade rose on Kimmy like a cartoon and she tipped over, alerting the bird of their presents.

"Caw." He walked up to Kimmy who froze from seeing the creature up close to her.

The bird brought no threat. Instead it rubbed its head on Kimmy in a friendly way. Dipper poked his head up and the bird only lightly tapped on his head.

"Dipper?" Mabel's voice was heard in the background, but the bird just gave an angry screech at Mabel.

"Mabel?" Dipper asked.

Kimmy became worried that the three may have found her, but Dipper held her hand calmly. "She probably wants to spy on us, typical." Kimmy took a sigh of relief. "Come on, we should check out that volcano. She'll be too distracted and roast marshmallows."

* * *

"Either that or throw garbage in and see how it explodes … actually that sounds cool. Have any trash on you?"

Dipper and Kimmy were floating in the air inside the entranceway of the orphanage. Dipper was cast in a light blue aura with his eyes glowing green as Kimmy just floats next to him, answering everything he says.

Kimmy held her hand out and created a small steam which showed where the three kids are. They were in a random dorm that sits right above them, but no matter what door they go through, they'll just end up in another room for as long as Kimmy likes …. Or as much as she can hold.

Kimmy held her legs tight to her body as she gazed at Dipper with sleepy eyes. She was getting tired.

"They've figured me out. Not just about me being … this." Kimmy gestured to herself while Dipper looks like has lounging in the sun. "But that I can use up energy too." He looked at her transparent hands. "I used to think that ghosts were limitless, but I guess a mortal would say that …. Heh ….." Seeing the kids just sitting there in a conversation, she decided to have the door lead to the basement. That way they'll never escape that dark place in time and Dipper will be all hers.

"Dipper …." She floated to Dipper and felt his forehead. Dipper smiled softly and placed his hand on Kimmy's, or at least try was it fazes through her hand, but Dipper did not notice.

Kimmy looked at her hand again.

"After all these years, I wanted to try going back to school, start a new, ….. actually make more than one friend." She looked at Dipper and smiled. "And then I ran into you …. And soon, we'll be together fore-'

AAAAAAAAHHHHH

Mabel, Dyami, Beethoven, and plenty of debris fell right through the ceiling.

"I knew that floor was weak!" Mabel shouted as she jumped up from the floor with pride.

"Mabel … you outshine the both of us….." Dyami felt his head as he and Beethoven lay on the floor.

"Isn't she something?" Beethoven sigh.

Kimmy was just shocked by this. She looked up at the hole in the ceiling and took notice of the weak flooring from years of neglect.

"Say, what time is it?" Beethoven ran to the door and Kimmy gasp when sunlight still spilled into the darken room. "We made it!"

Dyami shook his head and saw both Kimmy and Dipper in the air. "And there's our prize."

"WHAAA!?" Kimmy glanced at the sleeping Dipper and towards the kids. "But but but … you still have to-"

"Nuh huh!" shouted Mabel as she waved her finger. "You said to get here before the sun goes down, and Mr. Sun still got some party left in him."

"But … But…." Kimmy started forming tears as she held onto Dipper's body. "But we're perfect! For each other!" She held tighter. "He just ….. he can't know ….. and there's nothing to stop him! Except this."

Despite the fury Mabel held for Dipper's kidnapper, she still had a soft spot for Kimmy's reasons. "Look, it can still work. And believe me, I've seen worse obsession than this." Mabel shivered at some memories of Gideon. "Dipper's an understanding guy, I'm sure of you just hand him back we can-"

The door automatically shuts behind Beethoven and the sound of all the door's and windows' locks were heard clicking in place.

"So that's how you want to play it, huh." Mabel made an old western pose. "You're dealing with one of the greatest paranormal hunters in the world. Mabel Pines! Sister of Dipper Pines, and great niece of Stanford Pines and Stanley Pines! You don't have a 'ghost' of a chance. Dramatic pun intended."

If she still had a heart, it would be beating faster and faster from her conflicted mind. She held her fist tightly as she hides her tears. "I …. I never meant for this to happen. I-I just wanted to start over. Actually find people who will care about me and my weird ways….. and to help fill the void … of all these years of being alone, and missing her day after day, my best friend." She started sniffing while keeping her head down. "Every day, every week, month, years, the pain just kept on growing and growing, even though I've been dead."

Her sniffles stopped as she became silent. "But I know you curious types, she and I shared that in common. You just want to tell the world about what you find and get attention."

The room started to get darker as the kids heard something from the floor above.

"Maybe make new friends, meet new adults, adults with welcoming arms …"

Mabel walked close to Dyami and Beethoven as they huddle up for what to come.

"Dipper is the same. Even if he wouldn't intend it, they'll probably somehow capture me and I'll be a treated like a test subject and just like my old life, not a human being. Or they could just try to abandon me in this miserable place or banish me into some other world!"

The room began to shake.

"I …. I don't know what exactly will happen! But I know one thing, I'm just going to be alone again….."

Kimmy, with her ghostly hand, grabbed onto her face and tore it right off, revealing a bloody skull with a cracked forehead.

"FOREVER!"

Before the kids could let out a scream of terror, the hole of the ceiling began pouring in pounds of soil. They all just stood back as the soil kept on pouring in with no sign of stopping.

"She's going to bury us alive!" Beethoven held his head in panic.

Dyami just glanced around to find something to use to help them. He noticed the chairs and thought he could use them to smash a window open, but before he could run towards them, a long pale arm stretched across the room. Dyami looked over and saw Kimmy's arms and sleeves stretching to the ground like rope being lowered.

Dyami's mind went blank as her jaw hangs downwards as she let out a horrible shriek.

As Dyami stood there, Beethoven managed to find the courage and aimed the holy water filled squirt gun at her. But after he made that perfect aim, Kimmy held her arm out and the soil shot up and blocked the water.

"You ….. cannot …" Kimmy couldn't finish her sentence as she coughed up blood and felt her head in a weary state.

"…S-She's getting weak." Dyami managed to utter in some words. "We … we …" Before he could speak more, Kimmy teleported right in front of the native boy and grabbed him with large white claws.

"Dyami!" Mabel and Beethoven shouted out.

"I …. I got you!" Beethoven aimed the squirt gun at Kimmy, but Beethoven slipped on the dirt and fell over as the soil started to cover him.

"Beethoven!" Mabel tried getting him out, but Kimmy whacked her to the side.

"You know ….." Kimmy tapped her chin. "This world is terrible, why bother being stuck here?" If her jaw could work, she would have given them the most terrifying smile imaginable. "Why not join me?"

"Join you?!" Beethoven shivered.

"I don't mean exactly like me, unless you want it." Kimmy laughed. "I mean like Dipper here. He slumbers and sees wonders of things. Why deal with reality when you-"

"Been there, done that!" Mabel tried to think of something, but the dire state at hand was getting too much to her. "Stupid brain!" Mabel whacked her head.

"What the matter?" Kimmy floated near Mabel, making Shooting Star's heart race faster and faster. "Dipper's the true brains. Isn't he?" She looked over at the slumbering Dipper. "You're clearly the polar opposite of him. He had little to no friends, but had intelligence and determination of the future. But what about you?"

She poked Mabel in the stomach, causing her to step back. "You're charm and people skills will not help you here." She pointed at Dipper with her free hand, and pointed at the door with the claw holding Dyami. "You can either leave this place and live in that world, or you can try the impossible and suffer?"

"M-M-M-M!" Dyami kept stuttering while Beethoven poked his head out.

"Don't do it!" Beethoven's words made Mabel clenched her hands, but that's when she remembered. She looked in her right hand and realized she's still holding the silver mirror.

"I pick …"

"Oh, this?" Kimmy instantly grabbed Mabel, causing her to release the mirror.

"No!" Mabel tried reaching for the mirror, but Kimmy lifted her up to her level.

"Mabel!" Beethoven managed to struggle out of the dirt and reached for the mirror, but Kimmy created a hand, made of soil, and grabbed onto Beethoven.

"You all fail!" Kimmy laughed as she began to squeeze the kids. "So it's true what they say, love does conquer all!" She looked over at Dipper and sigh peacefully.

"K-Kimmy!" Dyami shouted. "I can tell you've been through horrible things! But you have to snap out of this!"

"This is crazy!" shouted Beethoven. "You're crazy! This place is crazy! And I'm pretty sure whaterever may you crazy is even more crazy!"

"I…I….." Kimmy's skull face showed little emotion, but the crack in her voice shows signs that the two boys were getting to her.

"And … and you … you don't have to do this!" Mabel said in a panic, yet easy voice. "We can be friends. We just need to …"

"They made an offer like this before…." Kimmy spoke in a silent tone. "… and look what that got me!" Kimmy moved them all close to her damaged skull. "Look at this! And look at this!" Kimmy threw all three into the soil as the room was nearly being filled up half way.

"No, stop!" the kids shouted as they became stuck in the soil.

"Yes … you can finally have your rest!" Kimmy started laughing hysterically. "You can be free of those reached bodies and be as powerful as me." She floated to the peacefully Dipper and hugged him lightly. "And we can be together, always."

Mabel's body was nearly covered. She tried reaching for the silver mirror with her free arm, but there was little use.

Seeing her friends getting buried alive, she gave one look at Dipper's sleeping body. She didn't want it like this, but the horrible fear she had for this time is coming true to her.

This is truly the end.

 **.**

 **.**

 **.**

 **.**

"Rar! Rar! Raaaaar!"

The soil stopped as Kimmy's arms dropped to the ground.

"What was that?" Mabel and the others asked as the dead silence was broke by what sounded like a high bark.

"Rrrrrrrrrar!"

"Oh no …." Kimmy started shivering. "It's ….. it's…."

Then the door burst open and a huge flame jumped right in.

"Woah!" the kids stumbled over as a flame just stood there with four legs and what looks like a very large and bushy tail.

"Rar Rar!"

"The Guardian!"

Standing among them, is the protector of this forest just as Lightning the Fairy spoke of.

The flamed beast, which appeared only as a fireball with legs at the first meeting, now has a more clear look and a much larger and apposing size. It appears to have facial features of a canine with white flaming legs with sharp paws; and several large flaming, bushy tails at the end.

It called out to Kimmy as the ghost just floated downwards. "Y-Y-Y-You." Kimmy's arms retracted as her face returned to normal. "You're that fire monster."

The guardian snarled at Kimmy as hit looked directly at Dipper.

Kimmy glanced at Dipper as her eyes widened. "No!" Her lower tone quickly rose as she stretched her arm out and grasped the guardian by the neck. "I refuse to give him up! He's mine!"

The guardian began to gag, but managed to scratch Kimmy's arm with his paw.

"AAAAAAAHHHHH!" Kimmy retracted her arm and felt the flaming pain. "No! Take this!" Kimmy created a rock and hurdle it at the guardian; but when it reached impacted, the beast just stood there.

"No, my energy." She turned directly at Dipper to see the aura slowly fading. "Dipper! Don't leave me!" Kimmy floated up to him, but the guardian jumped into the air and pinned her to the ground with its flaming claws.

"Get off me!" Kimmy turned invisible to faze through, but the paws of the beast managed to hold her still, holding the non-physical being in place.

The three kids were all in awe by this. Never in Dyami's or Beethoven's life looked at amazing as this fight.

"This is truly spectacular…" Dyami said as he watched the majestic powers of the guardian at first hand once more.

"Fight, fight, fight!" Beethoven chanted.

Mabel quickly grabbed the mirror and ran underneath Dipper. "I got you, Dipper!"

Kimmy looked over at Mabel and her non-existent adrenaline rushed through her entire ghostly being. "NO! I refuse to be left unloved ever again!" Harnessing whatever energy she had left, her hand became a shadow claw and gave the guardian a horrible slash.

The Guardian stepped back and gave a painful call as Kimmy rushed right towards Mabel.

In the very last minute, Mabel instantly moved the silver mirror right at Kimmy … and the ghost just stopped in her track.

Mabel opened her eyes to see Kimmy just staring into the mirror for a long time.

"….Wow …" She looked at her reflection with her widened purple eyes. "I…..I really am crazy."

The soil in the room poof out of existence, leaving Dyami and Beethoven bewildered.

She looked at her ghostly trembling hands and at everyone else. "Ooooooh my gosh ….. I can't believe I did all that … I was actually going to kill you! Kill you over …. All this!"

With her head lowered, she floated to the door and opened it. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."

"…. Is that just it!?" shouted Mabel frustrated as heat could have easily steam out of Mabel's head. "You kidnapped and replaced my brother, messed with our minds for who knows how long, and nearly killed us!"

"Please ….. just-"

"And now you're letting us go, because all you needed to do was take a good look at yourself and 'reflect' on your bad behavior, and that angry pun was intended too!"

"Mabel … just leave me alone and forget this awful place."

"Oh no we won't." Mabel folded her arms. "If you're really sorry, we are going to have a looooooong chat with not just me, Dyami, or Beethoven, but Dipper also. He-"

Then Dipper dropped from the air, landed on top of his sister, and regained consciousness. "Uhhhhh, what happened?" Dipper stood up and felt his head. He looked around everyone just giving him a look. "What's going-"

Mabel immediately stood up which tipped Dipper over. "Dipper!" Mabel embraced her brother in a tight huge. "You're alright! You're alright!"

Dipper was completely confused. "Did I bump my head or something?" Dipper rubbed his forehead. "All I remember is-" That's when Dipper noticed Kimmy standing at the doorway, looking shameful.

"Kimmy?" Dipper was about to walk towards her, but Beethoven and Dyami blocked his way.

"Don't, she's crazy!" Beethoven picked Dipper up and shook him violently.

"Not too rough!" shouted Mabel as she slapped Beethoven's hand and held onto Dipper. "We're taking you away from this haunted place and-"

"Wait, stop!" shouted Dipper as he pinched between his eyes. "Look. I don't know what's happening, but I had this dream and I need to do something before I lose this confidence I have right now."

Dipper took a deep breath and walked up to Kimmy. The others just looked in shock to wait for what to come.

"H-Hey Kimmy." Dipper nervously approached the girl.

"W-What are you…."

"Look, I need to ask you something." Dipper cleared his throat. "Will you ….gooooo ooooooon …. A … a date?!" Dipper twitched at the last part.

Kimmy just stared at him with wide eyes.

Not a single sound was uttered until Mabel said one sentence.

"Did you ….. just pulled a me?!"

"Mabel please." Dipper turned around. "You were right about getting over Wendy, and that I should have a single girl my age. A girl who floats, is transparent, and who have these dark soulless eyes that make you fall asleep and …."

Dipper's face turned completely blank as he slowly turned around to see the pale Kimmy rubbing her arm. He reached out his hand and fazed through Kimmy's shoulders as the girl floated back.

"….. Please tell me this didn't just happen."

"Go…" Kimmy spoke.

"…Wait, wait, WAIT! What the heck is-!"

"Just … just leave me ALONE!" Kimmy raised her head and stared at the boy with soaked eyes. "I said GO NOW!"

The room shook violently. He looked at his friends and noticed the tired look on their faces, and the Guardian. "What the?!" Before Dipper knew it, he was levitated from the floor and was gently moved out of the building.

One by one, the kids just walked out of the building to give Kimmy space.

Beethoven and the Guardian walked by Kimmy, and the wannabe bully decided to squirt her with holy water, and nothing happens.

"Guess it only works on crazy ghost."

"Out…." Kimmy angrily pointed to the door, to which Beethoven quickly jolted.

All that's left was the guardian.

Kimmy just stared up to the beast as her entire body began to shake. A new level of fear stuck into Kimmy's soul as the beast lowered its head at her and growled viciously with its white glowing teeth.

Kimmy's eyes nearly sank into her skull as she slowly looked away from the horrific monster that managed to overpower and hold down a spirit. She held her arms and legs tightly and slowly vanished.

The beast closed its mouth and looked at the kids examining Dipper.

"So let me get this straight." Dipper stood up. "Kimmy's been a ghost for years and was obsessing over me worse than Gideon did with Mabel."

"Not that worse." Mabel answered.

"And she attacked all of you!?" Dipper glared at the orphanage. "Mabel … why did she let us go then…."

Mabel was surprised by the angry look in Dipper's eyes. "Dipper, she got a good look in the mirror and realized how messed up she is." She placed her hand on Dipper's shoulder. "I still have a bone to pick with her, but … she …."

"The reason she wanted to go back to school all these years and holding you hostage was because she never actually felt loved when she lived."

Dipper's eyes widened as he turned to Dyami.

"Yeah, we found her room and this memorial paper thing." Beethoven handed Dipper the sheet as he examined it carefully.

He was shocked by all of this. He thought back to the broken desk and the blood stained room. He looked up at the orphanage as he started to feel concern. "So …. Kimmy was a victim?"

"Technically…" Dyami felt his head. "That note didn't sound like she died from that bloodshed, but that's all we know."

"I was too scared to really listen." Beethoven admitted.

Dipper recalled the events at the Northwests' Party and the lumberjack ghost. "Another Category 11 …. Or perhaps a 12."

"But then the guardian right here saved the day." Mabel presented the flaming creature to Dipper, who still stood there.

Dipper just stood there, absorbing on what he sees in front of him. "Oh my gosh …. The Guardian!"

The Guardian stood their proudly, looking at the small boy. It slowly walked up to Dipper and sniffed him.

"Heh, he likes you." Mabel smiled, but was given a small glare by the guardian. "She likes you?"

The Guardian let out a friendly bark towards Mabel. "She's so preeeeety."

The Guardian lowered its head to Dipper, sniffing around him.

"Woah, easy there." Dipper stepped back.

"I believe she's checking for wounds." Dyami walked towards Dipper. "Like Lightning said, she protects this place." Dyami smiled. "Can I …. Pet you?"

The Guardian looked happy and moved its head to Dyami, who patted the creature like a dog.

"Hey, I just remembered about the flames." Dyami sheepishly admitted. "And they don't hurt."

"I wanna pet it!" Mabel shouted.

"Me too!"

Beethoven and Mabel rushed in and petted the creature as its legs started jumping like an actual dog. Even Dipper started rubbing the Guardian under its head.

After all the horror they went through from an eerie building with a murder scene, to the revelation of Kimmy, and the pure terror she put them through, this was truly a peaceful moment they deserve.

"Hey Guardian." Mabel calmly asked as the gentle creature looked at her. "This just popped into my mind, but are you that Fox we've seen around town?"

The eyes of the creatures shot open as the flame around the body instantly died.

The kids jumped back to see that, just as Mabel guessed, the guardian was indeed the random red fox they've seen chasing rabbits around.

They were all just frozen in shock. The fox on the other hand slowly glanced around the kids, and dashed right into the woods.

"Guys….." Dipper turned to his friends. "I really want to express how amazing this all was, but all this is still too much and …. We should really get some rest."

"Yes."

"Sounds good to me."

"I'm never gonna sleep again."

Before the kids exit the property of the orphanage, a knot formed in Dipper's stomach. He looked back at the old building with all its secrets, but the one thing he was concern right now was the ghost girl he formed a crush on.

Taking a deep breath, Dipper ran up to the orphanage and took out a sheet of paper and a pen and wrote a quick note to stick on the door.

"Come on, Dipper!" Mabel called out to her brother. "I'm going to make you my chicken noodle soup when we get back!"

Dipper's pupils grew big as his stomach began to growl. "Coming!" Dipper left the door of Perfect Angels' Orphanage, leaving behind a note to Kimmy.

'Kimmy'

'They told me what you've done and how you acted. You probably don't believe this, but this was my third time dealing with ghosts. Seriously.'

'The reason I'm writing is, well if you promise to never hurt Mabel and my friends again, I want to help you. ONLY if you never harm my sister and my friends again. If you do, I'll have to take drastic measures.'

The note was then lifted from the door with an unseen hand.

 **End of Chapter**

 **Exmmv Xkkfsbopxov ql Rkqfi Kbuq Prjjbo**

 **A/N:** I would like to thank you all for liking and following this story, giving me reviews and suggestions, and overall giving Until Next Summer over 50,000 views. Not to mention that this story has over 100,000 words.


	42. Guide to Soup

**Chapter 42:** Guide to Soup

"And that is how you turn a watermelon into a pizza." Mabel spoke to her audience as she filmed in her kitchen as she displays a fresh pizza on the table.

"She just swapped the fruit for the pizza offscreen."

"Shut up, Dipper!"

* * *

(Play montage of Mabel doing things while her name is repeated with several different pitches.)

"Hello you lovely people." Mabel blew a kiss to the viewer as she makes her film in the kitchen once more. "Are you tired of crazy ghosts obsessing over your brother, leaving him with a warned out mind to be eased? Well Mabel here has the medicine for you!" A poorly edited photo of chicken soup appeared next to Mabel that partially covers her face. "Mabel Pines's Special Chicken Noodle Soup!"

"Mabel sweetie, what are you talking about?" her mother asked offscreen.

"Oh, I'm just making my 'Guide To' video on how to make my special chicken noodle soup for Dipper. He was kidnap by a ghost girl in our class who's obsessed with him."

"Mabel, what else did you inherit from me besides my imagination?"

"You're pretty eyes!" Mabel waved her eye lashes. "But anyway, time to make some soup!"

We cut to Mabel standing at the kitchen table with a hungry Dipper by her side. "Hello, Dipper. How's it feel being held against your will by a vengeful spirit of the dead?"

Dipper slowly looked at the camera, feeling a bit awkward. "Well it beats having your body being controlled by a diabolical dream demon who enjoys pain."

Mabel cut him off by slamming a bowl on the table. "Let's get started!"

Mabel showed the viewer all the ingredients. "First you get a pot of water going." She placed the pot of water on the stove and set it to high. "When the water starts boiling, drop a live chicken in!"

"Mabel, we don't have a live chicken, and that's not how you make soup." Dipper folded his arm. "….Wait, is that how it goes?"

"If you do not have a live chicken, like I do, use a substitute. Canned chicken broth!" Mabel poured the broth into the pot after the water boiled. "After mixing it around, you put a cup of cream sauce." She opened a package of cream sauce and added a cup worth into the pot. "Or as I like to call it, cream powder, because it's powder, not's sauce." She narrowed her eyes at the package. "You lie!"

Mabel walked to the counter and stood on a chair. "Now we chop up some veggies." She took out some potatoes, celery, onions, and fresh carrots. "Chop chop chop em up." Mabel chopped the produces, but then cut off her own hand. "Waaaaaah!" Mabel pulled her sweater to reveal her actual hand and picked up the fake one. "Courtesy of Ed's Joke Shop!"

"Mabel, they didn't give it to you, you bought that."

"As I was saying!" Mabel poured the chopped veggies into the pot and stirred. "While you do this, add some spices like parsley and basil." Mabel shook the spices into the pot. "While you stir, you have to sing a song. Doesn't have to be anything particular, just make sure it has clean words."

Mabel put the stove back on. "After all this, you let it heat up again, but don't let it burn." Mabel then squint her eyes and cautiously look around. "After everything is properly cooked, you need to add the secret ingredient. It's so secret, I can't even tell you what it is."

After a cut, the video showed Mabel pouring the now steaming soup into a bowl. "And tadaa, Mabel's special Chicken Noodle Soup … I forgot the noodles!"

Another cut and Mabel poured a bowl of soup with noodles. "And tadaa, Mabel's special Chicken Noodle Soup. Enjoy Dipper, you deserve it."

Dipper looked at the bowl with wide eyes and a drooling mouth. He took one spoonful of it, blew on it to cool it off enough, and ate it. The boy's mouth trembled with delight as the wonderful taste danced on his tongue. "Mabel, you outdid yourself."

"Why thank you." Mabel bowed. "And that was Mabel's Guide to Soup. Join us next time when discuss an exciting soup topic. Why is soup considered food and not a drink?"

"Oh, I can answer that." Dipper cleaned his mouth with a napkin. "You see-"

"Don't you dare ruin my future 'Guide To' video!" Mabel threatened her brother.

 **End of Chapter**

 **Qeb pbzobq fkdobafbkq fp klqefkd yrq x milv ql dbq mblmib ql bxq fq, tefze jxab Pqxkibv pl sbov molra.**


	43. Emails and Live Chats: 3

**Re-edit to fix some spelling errors. (Thanks Ghost Man)**

 **Chapter 43:** Emails and Live Chats part 3

Saturday evening, Dipper and Mabel have just finished their dinner and are now in their rooms preparing for another live chatroom with their friends over at Gravity Falls.

Earlier that morning; Dipper and Mabel wrote an email to Candy about their crazy mystery hunt at the abandoned orphanage. Both Grenda and Candy were relieved that they all made it out O.K. and asked about Dipper.

Mabel informed her that Dipper was tough and was more concern about his awesome sister and his friends.

After brushing her hair, Mabel walked over to her brother's room and found the big nerd at his computer, reading something.

"Hey bro, how're you feeling from yesterday?"

Dipper turned to Mabel and smiled. "Great, especially after having your homemade chicken noodle soup."

Mabel gave him a huge grin.

"And yes I am O.K. after that Kimmy incident." Dipper rubbed his head. "Being asleep like that wasn't all that bad. It was sort of like my own Prison Bubble." Dipper recalled a similar ghostly event over at Gravity Falls. "You know, you said yourself that being possessed felt like nothing back at the haunted convenient store. You even yelled out later that the Smile Dip was more traumatizing than-"

"We do not speak of Smile Dip in my presence, Dipper." Mabel strictly informed him. "So what are you reading?"

"Oh, an email from Wendy." Dipper showed her the long email. "It's her full report on their investigation on that Wind guy over at the Blind Eye's Hideout …. And she did not proof read this."

"That place?" Mabel asked. "Didn't they go looking there last week?"

"I guess Wendy didn't have the time." Dipper said. "They didn't find his identity, but man did they learn a lot." Dipper pointed at a picture token by Tambry of Manly Dan kicking the butts of Adolf and Gloria. "They ran into two zombie-like monsters that tried to eat Wendy, but then Manly Dan showed up out of nowhere and killed both."

(Cutaway)

"Hey Adolf? Are we dead?"

"No, we're eating this guy, aren't we?"

"Moe? When did he join our dinner?"

"Why do I even bother?"

(Fun Fact: That guy they're eating deserved to be eaten. :D)

(End Cutaway)

"Woah!"

"That's not all. It turns out that Dan used to be a Blind Eye, and knew about Grunkle Stan switching placed with Ford."

"Really!?" Mabel gasped. "Since when?"

"They didn't say. Probably not right off the bat." Dipper's excited mood slowly turned irritated. "And yet Manly Dan didn't say anything to me about it when I asked."

"As if you can beat some answers out of him." Mabel smiled.

"Good point." Dipper nodded his head. "So far McGucket and his son are looking through more memories of Wind. They even believe that there could be more secret passageways containing more stolen memories."

"Allll thanks to us." Mabel pointed to herself. "And I'm so happy McGucket's patching things up with his boy."

Dipper smiled and became more excited. "And you will not believe what they found in those memories." Dipper showed her another photo of one of the memories of the past. "Us! We're going back in time again." Dipper pointed to their selves in the memories and showed her Wendy's hat on top of his head."

"You mean when we get back for the summer? Or maybe even now!" Mabel turned to her left and stared at nothing for five minutes. "Maybe even now ….. maybe even now…"

Dipper shook his head. "But something seems off about this." Dipper looked back at the photo. "They didn't say anything else about it. All they said that we stopped some hove animal, looks like a horse, and Wind saying that the townfolks shouldn't have seen us yet." Dipper turned around. "I believe that we'll meet up with Wind when we travel in time again and team up to save the town; which could be the best possible way to find his identity."

"I bet it's the author of the journals." Mabel smiled.

"No Mabel. That's Grunkle Ford." Dipper reminded her. "And this guy appeared and vanished while Grunkle Ford was doing who knows what in another world. Wish he told me everything." Dipper sigh quietly. "But right now, after a good rest, I say we focus on Kimmy."

"Oh I hear ya." Mabel nodded. "Glad Kimmy came to her senses, but the next time she tried to steal you and spook us, she's gonna have to answer to this vacuum." Mabel took out a vacuum and started playing with the suction. "Oh no! It's eating my sweater!" Mabel laughed as she pretends the vacuum was a monster.

"Which is why we'll be prepared." Dipper looked at several bottles of Holy Water next to him. "If she comes back to school, I should speak to her alone. Just so we don't suffocate her with pressure."

Mabel pouted. "O.K., but I'll be keeping my eye on her with holy water balloons in handy."

"Ha, good idea." Dipper jotted down empty balloons on a list of materials to buy.

Dipper's computer alerted them that they have guests ready to chat. "Great, they're here." Dipper opened several windows and up came Grenda, Candy, Pacifica, Wendy, and Soos.

"Dipper, Mabel!"

"Hey guys!"

"Dudes, sorry I was late with that, kind of had a lot on my mind." Wendy folded her arms. "Can't believe those freaks had my Mimendo 65 this entire time!" Wendy rubbed her temples. "Also if you read it, my Dad was a Blind Eye for a week, and knew about Ford getting sucked into that portal."

"Don't forget about us switching bodies." Pacifica added, which caught Dipper's ear.

"You guys switched bodies. As in with that rug? Thought Soos gotten rid of that."

Soos shrugged.

"Yep." Wendy answered.

"Correct." Pacifica nodded. "I mean no offense to the Corduroy family, but they are barbaric. Yet quite a lovely family when they're calm."

Wendy snickered. "And don't get me started on your parents. I mean what do they think you are, a puppy?" Wendy asked. "Looks like they had a history of training your kid with bells. Glad I set them up with a psychologist."

"Another strike on being as my dad put it, 'Ruined family name'." Pacifica said with a bored look. "But I am so glad that happened. Now my family can act normal."

"Bell?" Dipper recalled that one time he saw Preston taking out a bell when Pacifica tried to explain herself, and when she let the common folks in. "W-What are you talking about?" Dipper's tone turned a little harsh.

"Hopefully a think of the past." Pacifica said peacefully. "Thanks for your concerns, but they're not 'The Worst' when it comes with parenting." Pacifica told him.

"Especially not like the ones in those movies our school had us all watched." Candy shivered.

"Everyone at school better learned something from them. My heart can't take it!" Grenda punched her chest.

"Tell me about it. No wait, never mind." Wendy folded her arms.

"Well that's a relief." Dipper sighed. "So does this mean you two are getting along?"

"Totally!" Wendy happily said as she turned to Pacifica. "Back when you were nothing but a rich bi …. brat. I avoided you as much as possible. So glad you decided to be cool now."

Pacifica smiled. "All thanks to that lumberjack ghost, and to you, Dipper." Pacifica gave Dipper a heartfelt smiled. "Dipper, thank you again for making me a better person."

Dipper could help but get some rosy cheeks from Pacifica's sincerity. "Oh, why thank you, I mean you're welcome."

This of course was like a huge siren for Mabel Pines, Match Maker. "I see those cheeks, Dipper."

Dipper was caught off guard as much as Pacifica. "M-Mabel, don't try implying anything."

"Hey, I'm just making sure you get a girlfriend your own age." Mabel's calm answer made both Dipper and Pacifica embarrassed.

"Mabel! Pacifica doesn't like me like that." Dipper tried to tell her, but she took it like a very small jab.

Pacifica said nothing.

"Well if ghosts aren't your type, what is?"

Dipper groaned as Pacifica thought about what Mabel said. "Ghost?"

Candy and Grenda 'oooohed' at each other.

"That's right!" Grenda shouted. "Tell us about the ghost girl who fell in love with you in an obsessive way that was still less creepy than Gideon!"

"What did she just say?!" Pacifica gasped as Wendy was also surprised.

"Woah, dude. You hooked up with a ghost?" Wendy looked at Dipper with disbelief. "Does this mean you can add ghosts onto the list with vampires and werewolves or whatever desperate ladies write about."

"Trust me; it's not what you think." Dipper took a deep breath. "Well I did actually ask her out, right before I found out she was dead the entire time."

"Way da go, Dipper!" Wendy cheered. "But seriously, everything's alright?"

"Well yes with us." Dipper answered.

(Cutaway)

"I'll never sleep again." Beethoven said as he sits in bed with a ridiculously large nightlight plugged into the wall.

Elsewhere, Dyami was on his computer looking up ghost-repellent information with his bloodshot eyes glued to his screen.

(End Cutaway)

"Kimmy on the other hand." Dipper turned to Mabel who looked concern. "Well when we climbed onto the second floor, we found a bloodstained room with multiple body tape."

"B-Body tape?!" they all asked.

"Please don't tell me like the ones in that abandoned convenient store." Wendy spoke. "Wait, where were you guys?"

Dipper told them briefly that they went down a wooden trail leading to an abandoned orphanage with their Paranormal Club along with a new girl named Jessica and the ghost, Kimmy.

After Dipper and Kimmy left before the ghost switched placed with him, Mabel took over.

"Then after Jessica left after a failed séance, we followed a trail of old blood to a door with horrible mean writing on it. We walked inside and found a note dedicated to Kimmy's death."

"Horrible mean writing?" Wendy felt it in the pit of her stomach how much that ghost might have gone through. "I don't think we need a good description there."

"Woah dude, I hope that ghost gets a happy ending." Soos spoke after listening to their conversation. "I mean not the dead ending, after life ending. Or just get a ticket to heaven and go flying all day or whatever they do up there. Must be pretty sweet."

"I bet they get free cars." Wendy added. "Or better yet, no bills."

"Well yeah, Wendy." Soos said. "Not like the Big Guy will let him in."

Mabel thought back on how Kimmy acted and what she said. "We should help her." Mabel then went on by telling them how Kimmy messed with them and how horrifying she was.

"Then she removed her face and showed us her cracked skull and filled the entire room with dirt." Mabel grinned as she ran to the door. "But then the Guardian jumped out of the door and fought Kimmy." Mabel imitated the creature pinning the ghost down with her claw. "But then Kimmy scratched the Guardian and flew right towards me. That's when I aimed the silver mirror and she just stared at it and rethought the whole thing."

"That's when I woke up, asked her out and found out she's dead, and she just opened the door and made us leave." Dipper added.

It took their friends a while to come up with what to say.

"So she's still there, at that so-called Perfect Angels Orphanage?" Pacifica asked with a calm and concern tone.

"I guess so." Dipper said. "I left a note saying that if she promises to never hurt Mabel and our friends again, I will help her."

"R-Really?" Pacifica asked. "After all that, you're ready to forgive her?"

"Just as long as she never tries to hurt us." Dipper spoke. "I understand that she had a horrible past and didn't really mean any harm, but there's no way I'll let Mabel get into direct danger like that."

Mabel gave Dipper a huge surprise hug. "Best brother, right here!"

Pacifica let out a small laugh. "Wow, Dipper. You're amazing."

Dipper's face turned completely red. "W-Well I-I couldn't just leave her like that. She's uh …" Dipper thought it was best to change the subject. "Anyway, we also discovered the Guardian's identity."

"Tsk Tsk." Mabel shook her head at her brother. "It was the local red fox we see around. It's just like if Gompers the Goat has super powers."

"Well that was quick." Wendy gave them a toothy smile. "Congratulations on your solved mystery."

"Well Mabel just randomly asked it if it was that fox." Dipper said. "All it did was turned back to normal and ran away. I just know there has to be something more to it." Dipper showed them some notes. "I believe it could be some kind of Kitsune or a Fox spirit spoken in Native American legends, or something different."

"We should ask Lightning the Fairy. She probably knows." Mabel said. "Or she'll just trick us into another funny prank."

Dipper tapped his chin. "You know, maybe Lightning knows about Kimmy."

That's when a tap on the window was heard. "Speak of the Devil." Mabel rushed in and opened the window and in flew Lightning.

"Kids!" she spoke in a panic tone. "Did you guys just seriously face that ghost girl!?" That's when Lightning noticed everyone on the computer. "It looks like you are watching a computer help character. Can I help?"

"Relax, they're from Gravity Falls." Dipper said. "They've faced a dream demon reign and lived."

"Oh…." Lightning looked at Dipper with irritation. "Wait, Dream Demon reign? Never mind." Lightning shook her hands. "I just got word from our Guardian that you survived the most powerful ghost in Piedmont and randomly guessed its identity."

"Most powerful ghost?" Dipper and Mabel asked.

"And you survived her power." Lightning let out a laugh. "You are impressing." She smiled as she lies on Mabel's head. "What did you do over at Gravity Falls to get so cool?"

"Dude, you have no idea." Wendy spoke up. "You're talking to the most awesome twins on this planet."

"I like your language." Lightning smirked. "Maybe I should talk with you more often." She looked down at Mabel and Dipper. "So just to get this out of the way." She flew up to the screen. "I'm Lightning, leader of my tomboy gal group."

"Tomboy all the way!" cheered Wendy. "Also I'm Wendy Corduroy, coolest person on the planet."

"I will be Pacifica Northwest." Pacifica spoke.

"I am Candy and this is Grenda." Candy introduced her and Grenda. "We are Mabel's best friends."

"Is it true all your friends are blood thirsty?" asked Genda.

"Yeah; when you randomly assume we're all girly." Lightning rolled her eyes.

"Oh I hear ya." Wendy nodded. "I proved that wrong about me when I fought in some stupid tournament run by 'manly' Minotaurs. Won first place."

Dipper really enjoyed Lightning and Wendy's conversation, but his curious mind urged him to halt it. "Sorry to disturb you, but you said Kimmy's the most powerful ghost here?"

"So that's her name." Lightning said. "You heard right."

(Flashback)

In a dark forest, Kimmy could be seen floating around and vanishing without a trace.

" _She haunted that forest for years. Just watching anyone walking by_."

Kimmy suddenly appeared real close to the viewer with shrunken eyes.

" _Now the mystical creatures in this town are low compared to Gravity Falls, but everyone there knows her and avoids that little spectrum as much as possible_."

A group of Pukwudgies ran away while one tries to shoot the floating Kimmy with an arrow. The Pukwudgie then held onto his neck as it was lifted up and slammed into a tree, which startled some fairies that were hiding there.

" _Only very few of us tried to contact her, but she would either disappear or get aggressive with us_."

"Like, how was I supposed to know texting and driving was stupid. My stupid parents should have told me louder." A snooty teenager ghost floated by, but was then randomly attacked with an energy sphere. "Oh no, not you! NOT YOU! Fine, I'll stop pretending my ghost phone works, O-KAY!?"

" _Heck, other ghosts are afraid of her_."

Kimmy floated into the night sky underneath a full moon and stare ahead with glowing red eyes.

" _Nobody knows exactly when or where she dies, or how. The only thing we do know is that her aura gives off great fear and sorrow_."

(End Flashback)

"Yet none of us had any idea she could fake a physical form and walk around you guys unnoticed by our Guardian." Lightning spoke as she lounges on Dipper's shoulder. "It took a while for the Guardian to remember her face when you guys passed by. Good thing it did at that time, you all would probably end up just like her."

Dipper's long summer of surviving Gravity Falls made him shook off that thought quick. "Well she entered our school on the first day this year." Dipper told the fairy. "So we're probably the first ones she spoke to all these years."

"Sounds about right." Lightning nodded her head. "Nobody back at the park and forest has any idea she started going to school, not like she could get a job after college. I mean would child labor laws still count for her?"

"Er, Lightning?" Dipper caught her attention. "You said one knows what happened to her?"

Lightning waved her hand as she lifts herself up with her arm. "We don't usually get involved with what humans back then. Heck, some elves are trying to figure out how those smart phones work. But whatever humans do, we avoid, all except for the Guardian." Lightning flew on top of the computer. "I'm not going to fill you in on everything about that fox, mostly because I don't even know that much about her." She laid on the computer and folded her legs. "But she wasn't around when Kimmy kicked the bucket, so maybe the last Guardian knew."

"Last Guardian?" Dipper asked. "What happened to the old one?"

"Well she doesn't have the wrinkles of a thousand year old immortal or something." Lightning rubbed her head. "She's actually a Fire Fox; a species of Red Fox that can do so many tricks with fire, with a bit of relations with Kitsunes. I'm guessing the most powerful one gets elected Guardian after the other retires or kicks the bucket."

"Awesome!" cheered Mabel. "I bet those foxes bite the butts of anyone that wanted to mess with us."

"Could be." Lightning laughed. "Boy you should have seen the looks on some desperate muggers when they tried to beat up this old lady walking in the park one night. One bite to the wrong spot is all it took."

Wendy and Lightning started laughing as the kids don't quite understand what the fairy met.

"I don't get it." Spoke Soos.

Lightning calmed herself down. "So there you have it. Kimmy's a ghost and the guardian protects. I don't have anything else to say."

"Thank you." Dipper nodded. "But I should tell you this, I really want to talk with Kimmy."

Lightning looked concern. "Well if she's really O.K. with you, I won't stop you." She flew up to Dipper. "Buuuuuuuuut. I will have to tell the Guardian. She's not too strict, but will probably just be a third wheel."

Lightning gave her goodbyes and flew out the window.

"So Dipper, you really want to help that ghost out after all that?" Wendy asked.

"Of course." Dipper took a deep breath. "But I know this will not be something simple like with those old people ghost."

Mabel, Grenda, Candy, and Pacifica felt concern for what Kimmy might reveal.

"Well listen to this, Dipper and Mabel." Wendy spoke in a formal tone. "If she's stops being crazy, comfort her and only ask questions she's fine with. Don't try and force anything out of her."

"Understood." Dipper said. "Maybe I can show her the journal volume to help ….." Dipper looked around. "Mabel, have you seen the journal volume?"

"Oh, Jessica had it last." Mabel said. "But she gave it back to you …. But that wasn't you, it was Kimmy."

That's when it hit them; they left the journal volume at the orphanage.

"Also I think your backpack's there too."

Dipper's eyes shot out. "Right, I have homework to do!"

Mabel gasped. "I forgot homework exists on weekends!" She sat on the floor in a needle position and rocked back and forth. "Remember in elementary school when homework stayed on weekdays?"

"Yeah." Everyone online said.

"I don't go to school anymore because I graduated High School." Soos randomly said.

"Lucky." Wendy pouted. "So looks like you'll be visiting Kimmy tomorrow."

"Either that or she left by now." Dipper sat down on his chair. "Either way, I really need to get them back. Hope Kimmy doesn't decide to keep them."

"If she does, you can trade her for one of these." Soos showed them a Whimsical Wind doll. "I mailed one of these to you guys. Hope you like them."

And so after some more engaging conversations about their lives and small events. Candy and Grenda gossiped about boys. Pacifica and Mabel had a good conversation about minigolf and Sev'ral Timez (and Mabel revealed why they were in the shack and why they acted like reality was just invented, which shocked and hopelessly confused the rich girl). Wendy ranted about school and her family. When she talked about the Blind Eye's hideout, she avoided anything relating to her memory, which really made Dipper curious.

After nearly an hour, they said their goodbyes and were about to log off, until someone poked their head into Dipper's room.

"Kids, are you in here?" Mrs. Pines came in and noticed the people on the screen. "Oh, you must be my kids' friends at Gravity Falls."

She walked up to the screen and introduced herself.

"Hello, Dipper and Mabel's mom." Soos greeted her. "I'm Soos, the new Mr. Mystery. Boy do you have some awesome kids."

"He said it." Candy said happily. "Mabel is our girl."

"BFF! BFF!" shouted Grenda.

"Why aren't you two adorable." She then noticed the teenager. "And you must be Wendy who Dipper likes."

"MOOOOOM!" Dipper shouted in embarrassment as his mother gave a sly smile.

"Did he try asking you out?"

Dipper groaned in the background while Wendy played along. "Well he randomly shouted his feelings towards me when he thought I wasn't listening." Wendy gave a similar smile to Dipper as the boy pulled his hat down to block his eyes. "But don't worry, I let him down easy. He's still one of my best buds."

"That's wonderful." Mrs. Pines gave a soft smile. "So was he crushing on anyone his own age?"

"Please stop!"

Wendy laughed. "Maybe, maybe not." She smirked at Pacifica. "Maybe Pacifica here wants a piece of him."

"WHAT?!" Pacifica shouted as Mrs. Pines looked at her. "Uh … uh …" Pacifica immediately logged off.

"My boy is becoming a lady's man." Mrs. Pines smiled at her son while Grenda, Candy, and Mabel joined in on the teasing. "By the way, did I hear you talking about a girl named Kimmy?"

"What did I do to deserve this?"

 **End of Chapter**

 **Jop. Mfkbp tfii exsb jlob lmmloqrkfqfbp ql qbxpb ebo qefoqbbk vbxo lia ylv fk qeb kbxo crqrob.**


	44. The Abyss

**Chapter 44:** The Abyss

"Ahhh, feel that fresh air." Stanley Pines stood at the stern of the Stan-O-War II as their ship blast through the water with Ford's advance engines as they quickly head back to the United States.

It has been an exhausting adventure. They fought monsters, discovered a secret civilization, almost hooked up with a guy, and befriended the ruler of the seas, Leviathan, or at least got on his good side.

"Soon we'll be dropping anchor in New Jersey, back at Glass Shard Beach … why did we agree on going back there?" Stanley took a deep breath as the mere thought of heading to his once home still hangs on his mind and its haunting memories. "You think they'll recognize me, Bro? I know Crampelter moved out of state, but hardly any of us made friends. So I'll probably be safe from the cops."

Stanley heard no response from his brother. He turned around to see him steering the ship with his head in the clouds.

"Still thinking about that old temple, are you?"

"Yes, Stanley. Also I'm still mad we're leaving so soon." Stanford glared at his brother. "Is attending Wendy's sixteenth birthday really that important?"

"Bro; that is not a quick and easy answer." Stanley walked up and sat next to Ford. "Gears in your head still want to figure that all out."

Stanford sighed. "I've made far more documents than I'd expected and we've found the true source of the strange phenomena, yet there's still more."

Stanley shrugged his arms. "Well you can't know everything, nor do we want to." Stanley shivered. "I hope Dipper doesn't go too deep on that internet."

Ford tightened his grip on the steering wheel. "It started out so exciting."

"We're flashing back to us breaking and entering Levi's place, are we?"

(Flashback)

"Oh my gosh, those things are hilarious, and terrifying." Stanley laughed as he and his brother drove their submerged Atlantian ships, which they were too picky on not naming them submarines, through the dark waters of the Abyss the Leviathan was held in for years.

"Indeed they are." Stanford said. As they watched the alien-like sea creatures in their natural habitat, Stanford pressed some buttons on his ship and a record logo appeared on a screen showing the animals.

"The creatures here have no sunlight, thus they must adapt to these cold and harsh waters without eating for days, or even months." They drove passed a sea creature glowing in the dark. "Yet they've evolved special abilities to hunt food and ward off predators."

"And they'll make great expensive pets!" Stanley grinned from ear to ear.

"Don't even think about it." Stanford laughed, "Unless you want to sell these recordings I'm making for a cheap horror film."

"You just gave me a million dollar idea."

Their joyful moment was soon disrupted when their lights shined on a pillar with ancient writing. "What do we have here?" It was Stanford's turn to smile ridiculously as he carefully drives around the pillar and examined the writing that weren't warned out yet.

He was unable to understand the writing, but he jolted down each character in case some Atlantians might decode it. However he came across one image that made his old bones shivered.

"Bill…."

Stanley moved his ship close and spoke to his brother though the ship's communication device. "Great. His face is everywhere."

"And that is how he watches us." Stanford said. "His image is like a window to our world. But Bill Cipher is dead, so these things are practically worthless now."

* * *

Elsewhere in another dimension, all of Bill's gang in the Nightmare Realm were watching Stanford looking at the image.

"They killed Bill!" All of Bills henchmen cried and hugged each other while some refugees quietly cheered in the background.

"Eh, I never really liked-" one lesser known minion was then swallowed by Pyronica.

* * *

After examining the pillar, Stanford suggested that they could be very close to more structures.

"Maybe it's on giant place." Stanley spoke. "Big guy, big place."

"Or a large cavern that goes down deeper than any other trench." Stanford smiled. "But don't forget. He can change his size. He could easily live in a doll house." Ford chuckled at the thought of Levi living in a doll house owned by his grandniece Mabel. "Well only one way to find out."

The twins noticed some more ruins and followed forward as they passed by more pillars and odd looking animals. The structures they've found were nothing too overwhelming, all except for one.

"…My word." The Stan Twins moved their lights around a gargantuan sized pillar sticking from the rocking ground of the ocean, with images of the Leviathan all over it. The near radius of the pillar could be the same as the empire state building. In fact, the pillar could be just as tall as the tower itself. "Did the Leviathan build this? Can he grow arms? Does he have arms?"

"Bro…." Stanley caught his attention as he aims the lights up ahead.

From what they are able to see, there stood what looks like a huge entranceway of a temple. Not as massive as the pillar, but was enough to give it a massive sense of wonders. The brilliant mind, Stanford, wasn't too caught up in awe as he made sure he recorded their start of a new adventure and be ready to start new ones.

"Well, care to dive in first?" Stanley grinned as he aimed the lights directly into the entrance.

"Why don't mind if I do." The twins drove into the temple.

Stanford was right about his hunch on the Leviathan changing size to fit his home. However this was no mere dollhouse with plastic hourglass shaped people, but was still very large with multiple hallways that looks suited enough to be in a royal castle.

"That monster really knows how to keep his place snazzy." Stanley said as they passed by a stature of the Leviathan, and shivered. "Even a statue of him gives me more creeps than Gideon."

Stanford couldn't help but stare at the statue, not entirely, but enough to wonder what secrets the beast holds. Looking back to his recent document of the smaller pillar, he gaze at the Bill Cipher image and recalled the promise he made to Leviathan, to not ask about his knowledge of Bill Cipher.

"I can understand why Bill would want to seal the Leviathan away." Stanford spoke which caught Stanley's attention. "Bill probably feared at the Leviathan would wipe out humanity and his chance of deceiving a fool to create a portal machine. But just telling us not to ask any questions though?" Stan wrote his words in his new journal. "He may know more about Bill Cipher; perhaps even before he was sealed."

"Like that fortune teller in some dimension?" Stanley asked as he referenced the new entries Ford made from the other dimensions."

"The Oracle." Stanford thought back to his destined arrival to Dimension 52. "Jheselbraum the Unswerving."

"So that's how you pronounce it." Stanley mentioned. "So what is it with her? I would randomly guess 'short time girlfriend' just to tease ya, but that's not possible."

"You're right there. Not possible." Ford waved his hand. "But believe me, I did not find her attractive that way, but we did enjoy each other's company. She's the one that gave me this metal plate and told me about Bill." Stanford knocked his head. "Maybe we'll meet again. Bill is destroyed now thanks to someone with the same face as me." Stanford smiled at his brother while he laughed.

"I punched him while I was just wearing my boxers and undershirt."

"You should wear more clothes around the shack more often." Stanford said. "Soos's grandmother lives there now."

"She better not girly up the place." Stanley sternly said. "Or go looking in my room."

They pass by the statue as Stanford told about his stay with Jheselbraum and what she revealed to him about Bill Cipher.

"Sheesh, even I'm not crazy enough to blow up the planet just to get more gold." Stanley said as they travel pass more images depicting the sea serpent.

Then they came across what looks like a rubble of rocks just lying on the ground. "Looks like he's not that spotless." Stanley looked around the rocks for any chance of finding something valuable, but noticed one interesting rock. To get a better look at it in hopes for gold, he used his ship's mechanical arms and lifted it up. "Say bro, look at this."

Stanford looked closely at the rock with the ships cameras. "Interesting. This looks almost like … actually this looks exactly like a foot of an elephant or a rhino." Stanford took the rock with his ship and examined it properly. "Well this does have some claws, so this is supposed to resemble a foot." Stanford examined the pile, there wasn't anything else clear, but the ways some looks doesn't look natural. "This must be the remains of another statue." Stanford looked at the foot again. "But this wouldn't be any good for a sea creature like the Leviathan."

"Maybe he has some land cousin he hates." Stanley looked at the pile.

"Hmmm …. That doesn't sound impossible." Stanford placed the foot in a cargo hold of the ship. "We should explore more." Stanford looked at his air meter. "How are you on air?"

"I'm good for another six hours." Stanley smiled. "Seriously, this is the only thing those fish guys got right about us air breathers."

They continued their expedition in the temple and found carvings and small statues of other sea creatures, including some prehistoric creatures like plesiosaurs and coelacanths. As they explore more and more, the came across the necessities to the temple such as living rooms, a dining area with a food storage room (apparently Levi really likes crabs, or they're just stealing his grub while he's out), and what looks like bedrooms with large bedding.

"Well he likes to entertain. That's for sure." Stanley smiled as they passed thought a well decorative hallway with several staircases. "But who would want to see his hideous mug?"

"That is a very good question." Despite Stanford's hawk eyes, was only till now he realized something obvious. "And we're underwater, why are there stairs?"

Then several large glowing crabs walked by.

"There's you're answer."

Stanford rubbed his chin. "I'm not too convinced."

"Still thinking big there." Stanley smiled. "Just make sure I'm with you before you make any more deals with cyclops from another dimension."

"I swear on my life." Stanford held his heart.

They traveled more throughout the temple as Stanford's feeling about the architecture design makes more sense as they find large chairs suitable for giants, objects that look like they're meant for candles, a few large fire pit like objects outside in an old courtyard with nothing but sand, and an ancient observatory.

"….. is this an observatory?!" Stanford's jaw dropped when they see what looks like a large telescope pointing up to the ceiling which looks like it could open up. He examined the structure all over and concluded it was indeed a large telescope.

"O.K this place does get dry." Stanley smiled. "So does the water drain or does this go up to the surface?"

Stanford started grinning like a child. "I don't know. I want to find out. I want to find out NOW!" Stanford's overly hyper Christmas morning grin slowly faded when he saw the oxygen meter. "We have three hours left already." He looked at his brother in the other ship. "And we still need to head back to Atlantis 2.0."

"Too bad you don't have one of these." Stanley showed off the artificial gills and smiled.

"Oh, these." Stanley felt sheepish as he looked at the gills laying right next to him and the swim suit to help with water pressure. "We have plenty of time to-"

"Ooooooh, forgot about the fuel."

Stanford slowly looked at the fuel meter, which is half full.

"Darn it….."

They turned their ships around to head back to the temple. "So bro ….." Stanley tapped his fingers. "We'll this place has a lot more secrets, still have no idea how big it is, and I want to get back to Gravity Falls before Wendy's sixteenth birthday ….."

Before Stanford could say anything else, they heard a loud noise from down the hall; which sounded organic, and large.

"Quick, hide!"

They drove their ships behind a Leviathan statue and turned their lights off. Waiting patiently, they watched something large walk pass them, a giant lobster with mantis-like arms walking by with glowing blue spots around its body to reveal its form to the hidden twins.

"I giant mantis shrimp." Stanford whispered to himself. He was well aware of the powers a normal mantis shrimp has. They are able to deliver powerful blows with their claws and have one of the most complexed eyes in the known animal kingdom, which both abilities are a danger to both Stans.

Using the ships camera, Stanford used the footage to zoom in on the creature to estimate is size without risking anything too close.

Thankfully the shrimp (well it's practically the size of an elephant) did not looked towards the statues and walked away. Seeing the close was clear, they set their lights to low and moved away from the statue. "Stan, those mantis shrimps can easily destroy these ships, and will most likely eat us. We need to leave this temple now."

"Didn't Levi give us full protection in the ocean?" Stanley reminded his brother, but thought of something. "Aaaaand we're trespassing his place right now looking through his stuff while he's at the Gulf of Mexico. Just follow my lead."

Stanley motioned his brother to exit from a courtyard, but after quietly moving through the temple, they discovered two giant mantis shrimps at the exit.

"Where the H were these guys this entire time?" Stanley asked while holding in his frustration.

Seeing another one heading their way, the twins maneuvered their ships to a hallway they haven't explored yet.

If it weren't for their adrenaline levels rising as they try to keep calm, they would marvel at how unique this hallway was compared to the others. The architecture was unlike anything they've seen with swirled pillars holding the ceiling with bizarre looking yet well designed patterns running diagonally. The flooring was made from pure white stone that reflected the light off their ships, but the one thing that the twins did noticed were carved images of different animals.

Yet with the light from one of the bioluminous Mantis Shrimp reaching in the other end of the hallway, they drove their ships a little faster and took quick glances of a carving of Leviathan.

Thankfully Stanford was swift enough to use the camera to record whatever their low lights made visible to them as they kept their eyes pierced for any more lights.

"There it goes." Stanford said as the light faded away. "We can't stay like this, we'll eventually run out of fuel and we'll have a greater chance of losing our lives if we go there in just diving suits."

"Hey bro, I think see a light."

Stanford was startled that it could be another shrimp, but the light Stanford pointed up ahead looked different and larger, as if a small crack of sunlight was beaming through the temple.

Stanford didn't believe it was from an organism like the mantis shrimp, but he urged Stanley to stay alert.

The light was coming from a large doorway that was slightly opened which the ships could easily fit through. Once inside, they found a very large room with the light source above them, and what looks like the water's surface.

"I think our hunch is correct." Stanford said as they drove underneath the light. "The temple could possible either rise to the surface or drain the water from within the temple. Whatever the case is, there is dry area up there.

"Air wise or toxic gas wise?"

Stanford rubbed his chin. "Good question. Luckily our ships are well equipped to test gas levels." Stanford rummaged through some cabinets and found the equipment. "However this will take a while, so just as long as there are no immediately threats, we should see for ourselves."

That's when the entire room lit up with the lights coming off from countless of Giant Mantis Shrimps.

"…I should start study the science behind jinxing. I could uncovered many information no scientist in the world would ever consider the-"

"Bro, not the time for nerd talk. Time for saving our keesters." Stanley pointed out as some of the Mantis Shrimps took noticed of the ships' presence. They didn't appear hostile or sees them as prey, but one false move could mean the end.

The Stans ducked down to avoid being spotted by the overgrown crustacean buffet as Stanley looked up to the surface.

"Can these things go up land?"

"Perhaps, but they won't be able to attack us as dangerous as in the water. It's our best shot."

They slowly floated to the top, but one Mantis Shrimp swam above and gently landed on top of Stanford's ships, causing it to sink down slowly as Stanley's ship continued its pace.

Thinking quickly, Stanley looked through the ship's equipment for anything useful. After throwing random objects around, he found the perfect tool for the job.

'Glowing Treats' it said on the package. 'Great for distracting hordes of blood thirsty monsters that can easily kill you in a split second and drag your remains where no family member will ever find them.'

"This is the most disturbing yet easily eye catching description for a product." Stanley wasted no time as he skimmed through the instructions and placed the treats in a vent.

The treats were dropped from underneath the ship and after sinking several feet, the treats began to give up a purple glow.

All of the Mantis Shrimps looked directly at the treat and swarmed towards them at once, fighting each other for the few bites of food.

The one on Stanford's ship was the last to notice as it swam off and floated to the bottom to join the brawl.

"Fight, Fight, Fight!" Stanley cheered as both he and his brother quickly reached the rippling surface.

When the ships broke the surface, the brothers exit their ships and breathed in the fresh air.

"This is oxygen, right?" Stanley asked.

Stanford checked himself out and breathed again. "Yes. This is indeed pure air …. And yet it was far more likely for this to be toxic vapers."

"Well we're O.K.!" Stanley shouted as he placed his fists on his hips. "We're away from those monster and are now in aaaaaaa HOLY MOLEY!"

Stanley stared in awe as Stanford looked around to fully see the beauty of what they found.

They were still in the temple, there was no way they could have reached land, but the room itself looked as if it was the bright and sunny land sitting above the dark and cold ocean.

There, they were in a the largest room they've seen in that oceanic temple, but the only thing in that room that resembles the ocean itself was the beach several yards ahead of them. Stanley and Stanford drove their ships close enough to the shore to reach the sandy beach that leads to a majestic forest with nothing but green plants and beautiful colorful flowers.

The slowly looked up to see the greenery reaching the walls and ceiling as massive light-producing crystals sticking from the ceiling gave off the sun-like light and heat into the underwater arboretum.

They took all the time they wanted as they walked down a stone path as they watched each and every species of plant new to science.

As they approached a yellow flower with blue spots, Stanford's pupils grew as he watched a butterfly with white wings landing on the flowers, and the white wings copying the patterns on the flower.

"Write, write, write, write, write, write!" Stanford quickly jolted down notes and drawings as Stanley couldn't be more excited.

"This here, this is what we've been talking about through our whole childhood!" Stanley said grandly as he gazed around the forest. "Minus the babes and treasure, which I should check later, we're on this journey for adventure and discovering whatever crazy and amazing thing this planet has to offer us, and rub it all in Dad's face!"

They continued their path down the trail as Stanford tried out his new 'digitalized camera' as he praises the clearer shots he can easily see and edit.

Their journey through the forest felt like hours as they discovered more and more species of plants and insects.

Before even the slightest of disinterest formed into their minds after seeing nothing but flowers, they eventually came across a large clearing of grass with a large stone platform up ahead.

After crossing the meadow, the explorers got a good look at the 20' circular platform with unknown writing across the circle and a small centered giving off multiple colored lights.

After recording everything he sees and giving his own thoughts, Stanly pointed above and there were three carved images of different creatures in the ceiling, which includes the Leviathan.

Well two creatures. Stanford and Stanley noticed a third space covered in burn marks.

"Guess it's the guy Levi hates." Stanley pointed out the scorched area the Leviathan could have done himself. "So this means he can go on dry land if he gets angry. I hope he doesn't follow us back to Jersey."

Stanford prayed and prayed that this all has nothing to do with Bill Cipher. He just wants to ask Leviathan endless questions about his findings in this temple alone.

Who made this building and for what? Why is there a haven of unknown plants and insects here? What are those glowing crystals? What is the creature who depictions in this place was destroyed and why, speaking of ….

Stanley looked over to the second untouched carving of a creature. It was hard to make out, but it looks like either a bird or a dragon covered in feathers or perhaps modified scales. Or it could be something completely different like a flying mammal, or something ridiculously stupid like a worm wearing a fur coat. He blames the Leprecorn for that last thought.

Stanford set his feet on the platform to get a closer look at the center and to see if anything could activate.

Taking out his scanner, he recorded the middle section to find any new readings.

To add more mysteries he would kill to get solved; he received a faint signal, a signal familiar to him. "Amazing….." Stanley slowly stood back as he gazed around the green meadow and the forest surrounding them. "This is very weak, but this is giving off the same energy as the phenomena I first detected in these waters."

"Woah, really?" Stanley smiled. "Like when that shield broke and out came Levi."

"Yes. If I could record the reading from that event, I could possible understand more about what trick Bill used." Stanford pointed the scanner away and checked his surroundings. "Maybe there's still some energy left over from the-"

Suddenly to his surprised, this scanner started going crazy and in a split second it malfunctioned before his eyes.

He just stood there in awe at what just happened. "Stanley. Do you know what this means?"

"It broke?"

"No! Well yes that happened, but the reason why it broke." Stanley dropped the device. "This place … or wait. Maybe it did just break due to me dropping it in the sink back at Atlantis 2.0." Stanford wiped some sweat off his forehead as he excited heart slowed down. "For a minute, I thought ….. well actually that could still be the case. Seems unlikely, but plenty of people said that about many great discoveries such as-"

"Get to the point, Pointdexter." Stanley said in a dead tone.

"Sorry." Stanford took a deep breath. "This entire temple may possibly be giving off a bigger reading than I recorded while we were still back at Gravity Falls. Buuuuuut." Stanford looked back at the platform. "If that was the case, then I wouldn't have gotten that small signal there." Stanford pointed at the center of the platform. "So it must have just broke."

"Well for some reason I'm not buying that." Stanley smiled. "Want to explore more before another monster of the day shows up ….. alright, whoever runs the jinx machine, what's next?"

Upon answering Stanley's question, the next threat had appeared … an annoying bug buzzing around his ear.

One swat at it and it was over; Stanley's ear is now safe.

"O.K. … say what's that?" Stanley pointed at a piece of paper on the edge of the platform.

Stanford did not notice that until now while he was recording the writing. He picked up the paper and was shocked to see it was a letter, a letter in plain English.

"Who, where did this come from?!" Both twins were completely shocked by this. "Stanley, are you pulling another prank again?"

"Not me this time, bro." Stanley held his hands up. "Just see what it says."

Stanford adjusted his glasses and read the letter out loud, while being careful not to say something stupid his brother may have wrote.

* * *

 _To the Pines twins that calmed Leviathan's wrath._

 _What you've done was remarkable. I was astonished by the seemly-fatal blow to Leviathan and later calming its wrath. I was probably just as shocked as you when I witness the beast reattaching its head like that. I mean you guys cut it right off and it starts acting like playdough with magnet powers. They should do that in a kaiju movie._

 _When I wrote this letter, it was on short noticed as I was about to leave. But I figured, with your curious minds, you will discover this place while Leviathan was not here. And when I said I, I mean both me and Leviathan. Yes that's right, he knows…._

… _.._

Both Stans gulped.

…..

 _It was I who have display that light from this abyss before Leviathan left… unless you didn't see it. It was early in the morning after the party. I was never any good at big parties, the crazy Stan was acting crazy, I doubt he would wake up early. It actually took me a while to figure out that light signal in his temple. I'm getting off track._

 _I spoke with Leviathan personally and I have to say, we agree on a lot of things, not 100%, but enough to enjoy each other's companies._

… _.._

"So this person speaks dolphin?" Stanley asked.

…..

 _You're all probably wondering who I am._

 _Well isn't that a can of worms or something. Look, I don't want to say too much, but I would say that I was your neighbor in that hotel and I was the one who got angry that you guys ate all the food. Seriously, do you have any idea how long of a travel this was? And I was so looking forward to trying out their homemade waffles!_

 _I was also the one who beat that crab up and told Mermando where the sacrifice was going to be. He and his wife (I don't want think of that too much) are kind hearted creatures, and apparently you two looks like it as well._

… _.._

"Ha, this guy's wrong about that." Stanley laughed. "I'm bad to the bone, especially when I help Mabel out in her beauty pageant for stuffed animals … shut up, Ford!"

…..

 _You two must have plenty of questions, and I'm sorry for feeding you more, but I cannot say anything relating to that creature called Bill Cipher (cool name though. Leviathan gotten angry when I said that)._

 _But I do have a message from Leviathan that he feels that you should at least know._

 _Leviathan and other creatures were apart of some 'Plan B' to destroy Bill Cipher. Now I know a few more details about Leviathan and his pals than you do, and I didn't learn this from Leviathan first._

 _Also he wants you out of his temple now. You should see an angry swarm of bees flying around you._

… _.._

That's when the Stans noticed the swarm of bird sized bees flying above them.

"They're flying, and yet they're not making and buzzing noises." Stanford said in a horrified tone.

…..

 _And those Mantis Shrimps should leave you alone. Leviathan said that he would have threatened you guys to stay away from here despite giving you protection, but he decided to be cool and told his guards to just scare you off. Looks like Bill Cipher scared him more than I thought._

…

"Huh, guess we could have gone exploring more." Stanford mentioned. "Remind me to get a better look at that hallway with all those animal carvings."

…

 _So that's all Leviathan wanted to say. But I still have more to write._

 _Look, I heard that you came all the way from Gravity Falls. Well I have a very important request from you. I really really want to figure out something that's been bothering me for far too long. Please look in that chest and take out what's inside, unless you already did that._

…

"Chest?" Stanford noticed the small chest next to where the note was. "What do we have here?" Before Ford could lay a single finger on it, Stanley swiped it away. "Stanley…."

Stan wasted no time in seeing what the chest hold. "Gold gold gold." He took out the object kept in the chest and found a necklace with a blue gem. "Hmmmm. I'm sure it's forth a shiny penny."

Ford sighed as he continued to read the letter.

…

 _That gemstone can allow us to communicate. When you reach the United States, heat the gem up with either a fireplace or a heater (not microwave safe), that's practically dialing. Why's it like that, I don't know._

 _I'm running out of space here, but I don't want to have a quick conversation about the weather and what not, it's important._

 _I really want to have a word with you. You have no idea how much of a help you could be, even Leviathan couldn't help me._

 _To the one who helped save you, ….. I'm not giving a name just yet._

 _P.S. If you remember the sound of my voice, that's just how I sound like when I'm mad. I do have a gender._

* * *

Stanford took a moment to think about the request the writer made and the necklace Stanley handed over.

"Fascinating. Someone else spoke with Leviathan, and that beast was a part of a plan to destroy Bill Cipher." He paced around the platform. "And what are these other creatures the writer spoke of? And what does he need help with?"

"Fascinating." Stanley rubbed his chin while he acts like his brother to tease him. "And when will those bees attack us if we don't leave right now."

Both Stans looked at the silence bird-sized bees slowly approaching them.

(End Flashback)

Stanford and Stanley sat peacefully in the bright sun. They've switch the boat's engine to low so they could enjoy a good lunch as they talked about their last quest in the Arctic Ocean. After going through his digitalized camera and the dim recordings he took in the hall, we wasn't really able to see what those other carvings were, and sadly he couldn't check on their way back because the mantis shrimps quickly covered them up with curtains, and he could have sworn one of them were mocking him.

"Still tick about those other creatures that guy with the weird voice said." Stanley said as he handed Ford a soda. "So I guess Levi does have friends. Their parties must be hilariously scary."

Stanford kept his puzzled face. "There's just so many things that came up, I can't really think straight." He slapped his head as he gave Stanley a tired look. "Heck, I'm probably overlooking obvious questions right now."

"Well that's what your diary is for. I guess." Stanley leaned on his chair. "Write down what happen so you can look them over later with a clear mind."

"Heh, that's actually good advice." Stanford took a deep breath and relaxed as he let his mind go easy as he enjoys the sun. He looked at the necklace in hand that could communicate with the writer. But since they've asked to talk when he has time and when he arrives back to the states, he decided to put that to the back of his mind like all his other thoughts.

"And if it makes you feel better, Soos can check that video out and make it brighter or something involving computers." Stanley sighed as the thought back to what's ahead of them. "Going back to Jersey, crossing the country, and heading back to Gravity Falls. We should definitely pay the kids a visit." Stanley nudged Ford. "And you need to see Shermie and his boy."

"That sounds like a great idea. We should surprise them."

"Ha, Mabel would tackle us and I'm sure that will be stronger than those punching shrimps!" Stanley laughed. "And then we'll go back to Gravity Falls, after checking our luggage for a certain over-hyper stowaway, and we can be back in time for Wendy's birthday."

"Wendy Corduroy's birthday." Stanford looked at Stanley. "Brother, why is her birthday important?"

Stanley knew this would come up. He took a deep breath and looked at Ford right in his eyes. "Ford, if Wendy wasn't an employee at the shack, I probably just wished her a good birthday, but the fact she's going to drive a car and that it would be three years since she turned thirteen and then ….. right…" Stanley sat up. "You weren't here when ….."

Ford recognized that look in his brother's eyes. "Stan, if you don't feel like-"

"No no. You really need to hear this just in case you bring something up." Stanley looked serious for what he was about to say. "It all started when Wendy turned 13."

 **End of Chapter**

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* * *

 **A/N: If you are not aware yet, I have given all past chapters their own code to decipher. Have fun!**

 **Also I have a poll on my profile where you can vote for 3 of your favorite chapters in this story up to chapter 40.**


	45. Ghost Girl

**Chapter 45:** Ghost Girl

"O.K., I got holy water …. Crucifixes … I should bring the hand vacuum just in case ….. if only I didn't leave my backpack so I can actually put all this stuff in."

Dipper was in his room preparing for his trip back to the abandoned orphanage. It has been two days since Kimmy kidnapped him and attacked his friends. Thankfully Kimmy wasn't really out to kill them like the other ghosts, so it should be easier for him.

After what everyone went through, he would have waited till at least Monday at school to see Kimmy, but he left not only his backpack with his homework, but also his journal volume Grunkle Ford gave him. There was no way he'll let anything happen to that book.

He had told his parents that he's just picking up something homework related at one of Mabel's friend's house while she was busy with her own work. He didn't want his parents to ask too many questions to get him nervous if he says 'his' friend's place. His folks have keen senses when it comes to things like these.

Thankfully they let him go with only 'be safe' and 'be back before dinner'.

Right when he decided to go with a single vile of holy water, Mabel walked into his room.

"Dipper, are you sure you'll be O.K. going by yourself?" Mabel asked, feeling concern. "I know Kimmy just needed a good thinking to calm herself down, but what if she goes at least half as crazy?"

"Don't worry, I got this." Dipper patted her shoulder. "You're talking to the guy who captured a full grown Gremoblin; and from what you told me about Kimmy, its best if she doesn't get too uncomfortable if more than one of us showed up. Plus, I did leave note saying I'll help her if she promises to never hurt you."

Mabel felt touched, but still wanted to go with him to protect her dear brother.

"Besides, I already told mom and dad you'll be here doing homework and you asked me to pick up something you left at 'Kimmy's house'." Dipper winked at her.

"I hear ya." Mabel calmed herself down. "I mean I dunno what she's been through. So you're probably right." Mabel giggled as she nudged Dipper. "Maybe you two can go on a date."

Dipper held his face and slowly shook his head. "Look, she is cute. But I doubt it would-"

"Dipper, what was that you just say?" Mrs. Pines asked as she walked passed Dipper's room with a basket of laundry.

"Nothing! Nothing at all…." Dipper let out a pity laugh as he hides his true intentions. "Just talking Mabel out of her hooking up me and a cute girl, darn it!"

Mrs. Pines's eyes started to sparkle after hearing her son say 'cute'.

It felt like hours trying to get out of the house after his mother asked him so many questions about Kimmy, and it didn't help at all that Mabel mentioned Kimmy loves D D n' M D as much as Dipper.

After hearing plenty of support from both girls of the house, Dipper left home and walked passed the park to reach the gate to the old dirt road. Before he hopped the gate, he heard mumbling behind him.

"D-D-Dipper? Are you sure ….."

Dipper turned to see Beethoven and Dyami, who both looked equally nervous.

"M-My friend, Dipper." Dyami calmed himself a bit before speaking more. "Are you at least well equipped? I've heard online that ghost can't eat cheese ….. no wait, that was from a cartoon." Dyami felt his head. "My mind still shakes from the sudden terror brought upon us by Kimmy the Spectrum."

"She'll bury you alive!" Beethoven shouted. "How am I going to explain to your perfect angel of a sister that you got captured by Kimmy again!? Not to mention her parents, the school, and the police!"

"Look." Dipper spoke firmly to keep their focus. "I was at Gravity Falls all summer; and Kimmy ….." Dipper turned around to see that old road as the wind carried some dirt away. "Kimmy clearly have been through a lot, too much for her mind to handle all the time." Dipper reached for the gate. "I'm no psychologist, but she stopped herself from killing you all." Dipper patted his pocket. "I have some holy water on me, so I will be fine."

Beethoven and Dyami looked at each other.

"If you say so." Dyami said quietly. "But if you don't mind, we would like to stay outside at least." The native handed Dipper a walkie talkie. "Just to be safe."

Dipper examined the walkie quickly and nodded. "Alright, let's go."

The three boys reached the property of the abandoned orphanage and walked over the fallen gate. They gave one good look at the eerie building as memories of Kimmy's hauntings felt like nightmares to Dyami and Beethoven.

Before they could walk up to the door, they noticed something orange curled up in front of the door. The thing's head rose up to reveal the guardian of the park and forest, the Fire Fox.

It sat up and stretched its body before walking up to Dipper.

"H-Hello." Dipper greeted as the other boys remained silent. "Keeping an eye on Kimmy?"

The guardian slowly nodded yes.

"So you can understand English, and I'm going to guess you can't speak yourself."

The fox nodded again.

Dipper wasn't sure what the fox would do or what it would be against, but he will just tell her why he came. "I left behind my backpack and a journal filled with documentaries of Gravity Falls' weirdness. Also if Kimmy promise not to hurt these guys and my sister, I want to help her cross over."

The fox tilted her head as her ears perked up. She stood straight up like a well-trained dog and looked over at the door.

"Thank you." Dipper told the boys to wait here as he goes in. As he opened the door, he noticed the fox walking besides him. "You're coming in just to make sure I don't get kidnapped again?"

The fox nodded.

Dipper wasn't sure how this will affect Kimmy, but what choice does he have now.

Dipper and the Guardian closed the door behind them and scanned the lobby for any paranormal sign of Kimmy. It looked completely normal like on Friday, except for the huge hole in the wall. No dirt, not burned marks, nothing.

Dipper and the Guardian looked at each other briefly before Dipper looked at the stairs. He wanted to call out to the girl, but he feared he might scare her away. Looking up at the staircase, Dipper decided to look in her dorm first.

The boy and fox climbed up to the second floor and looked at the blood stain room. The Guardian walked inside and sniffed the chalk outlines depicting the murdered corpses.

"So… know anything about this?" Dipper asked the fox who looked at Dipper and shook her head no.

Dipper then noticed the trail of blood leading down the hallway. He and the Guardian followed it until they came across the door facing the child-size chalk drawing. Dipper motioned the fox to stay silent as he approached the door.

Before knocking, he looked at how vandalized the door was. Some words written on it made Dipper gasped in shock. With his mission in hand, he took deep breath and slowly reached the door.

"It's open…."

Dipper and the Guardian were caught off guard by the sudden voice.

"K-Kimmy?"

There was a long silence before the voice spoke up. "Yes. You're here for your stuff. Just take it and leave. I don't want to harm anyone else, unless they deserve it maybe."

The fox started to growl.

"I-I mean really bad people!"

The fox stopped her growling as she properly sat down, allowing Dipper to enter alone.

Dipper opened the door and saw no sign of Kimmy, but did find his backpack leaning on a bed and the journal volume open at a desk.

"Kimmy?" Dipper called out, but no response. "Are you still here? I can help you get to the other side."

Still no response.

It didn't look to Dipper that Kimmy didn't want to talk now. Heck, she may never want to go back to school after what happened.

Dipper still felt some grudge for Kimmy for what she did, but with one look to the door, he brushed it off and took his back pack.

When he picked up his journal, he saw the book open to the section he wrote himself on the Northwest Mansion Ghost and his thoughts on category 11. There was even a bookmark saving a page for the lower categories of spirits Grunkle Ford had encountered in Gravity Falls.

Dipper looked up and spoke. "Kimmy, if you can still hear me, I want to help."

He heard no response again, this will probably be the last time they ever heard from Kimmy.

Before he could walk out, he took one good look in the room and was astonished at all the figures and movie posters. "Hey, Mothgad." Dipper grinned as he looked at the other posters of movies he likes that are actually good unlike the ones he watches with Wendy.

Over at the shelves, he saw some figures which really sparked his excitement. "This Supermale figure is worth thousands …..in mint condition only … ugh, looks like someone snapped the head off and was glued back on."

That's when he noticed the old board games underneath one of the beds and pulled out Dungeons, Dungeons, and more Dungeons. "No way, this edition is old! It even has Master Berserker's original design before they got rid of his pet dragon."

"They got rid of Scaly?"

"Yeah, because someone discovered a huge trick to win every game. It's practically almost as powerful as the Impossibeast ….." That's when Dipper noticed Kimmy floating next to him.

Seeing Dipper looking straight at her, she gazed at her hands and spoke out loud. "Huh, thought I was still being invisible …" She and Dipper locked eyes as they stood their silently, without moving a muscle or ghost muscle.

The Guardian looked inside the room to see the two kids just awkwardly staring at one another.

"Arf."

The Fox's call caught their attention as they try to think of what to say.

"So ….." Dipper played with his fingers. "Yyyyyyyooooooooouuuuuu'rrrrrrrrreeeeee-"

"Dead." Kimmy finished with the emotionless tone she had at school.

"Sorry about that." Dipper kept his mind focus. "And I just want make this clear, especially when the Guardian is listening, wasn't my idea for that." Dipper pointed to the Guardian staring directly at Kimmy, giving the ghost girl shivers. "As I was saying, have you read the note I left?"

"I did." Kimmy looked away. "I-I'm sorry for what I did. It was wrong and I promise to never harm them again."

Dipper heard her weaken voice. "O.K. Now I think I can-"

"I-I was being crazy back then. I mean I kidnapped you and put you to some prison dream and I pretended to be you!" Her voice started to rise as she continued. "It's practically like being a slasher who cut their victim's faces and wear it over their own. I mean I only saw one horror film like it, but it was so cheesy to be traumatizing and really needed to be censored, and I'm not talking about the blood!"

"Uhhhhh, Kimmy?" Dipper tried to get her attention, but the spirit started floating in pace while saying more and more about her actions.

"And I know I scarred Dyami and Beethoven. They and your sister are actually nice people who spoke with me, and what did I do? Sent them into random rooms as they try and rescue you from being my prisoner forever and right at the final battle I ripped off my own face and showed them where I landed and buried them in symbolic soil!"

"Landed ….. symbolic soil?" Dipper gave her a confused look on that last part.

Kimmy glanced at the fox and quickly turned away in fear. "Then she showed up out of nowhere and used whatever powers she has to actually hurt me! I'm a ghost, I was killed and became a ghost, a ghost with no actual physical body, and she can hurt me." She gestured to the fox. "I mean what is she? She has characteristics of mystical fox from Japan I've read about, but she can't transform like I can. And she lives in that cave which give me weird feeling every time I go near it, and-"

The Guardian growled at her in a way to shut her up.

"And then there's you! I knocked you out cold the second I had a chance and trapped you in some fantasy world with nothing but everything you like, literally the perfect trap. I mean what kind of sick-o does that?"

"You'll be surprised." Dipper rubbed the back of his head as he tries to forget some disturbing flashbacks. "Alright, now let's calm down so we can-"

"And why did I do that? Because I fell in love with you just because of a few moments!" Dipper was not prepared to hear that, which made his anxiety take over his body for a split second to make him flinch like an awkward fool.

"I mean that's like the first in a long time someone supported me like that, but from a boy. Besides my only friend in this big world, you were the only one that showed me comfort, and of course I forgot about Mabel giving me this bear." Kimmy picked up the bear what sat on a bed.

" _There there, bear bear."_

"If I was alive, I might have stalked you everywhere and make shrines, while I act like a bully to you and possibly destroy anyone I don't like, yet still feel compassion by others." Kimmy felt her head. "I mean who knows how an actual date would be like. It could end in disaster." Kimmy noticed Dipper and shook her hands. "I am not saying you're not worth dating! You're kind, smart, funny, and you like Dungeons, Dungeons, and More Dungeons." Kimmy placed her hands on her cheeks. "And you're just so determined to face anything for adventure and knowledge. Dyami seems more excited for the heck of it, but you! You look nothing like some tough guy. NO OFFENSE! And yet you're so brave to come all the way back here after what happened just to grab your stuff, and you want to help me. Me! The ghost who wanted to keep you sleeping forever so I can spend every moment together and eventually start kissing while you pet my hair and you look at me with your cut face-"

Kimmy quickly realized what she was saying as she slowly looked at the red-faced boy with wide eyes.

"Heh ….." Kimmy instantly vanished before Dipper's eyes.

"W-What, Kimmy!"

The Guardian than raised its tail at the door while it growled upwards, where Kimmy suddenly appears. "I seriously don' t know what you are." She sighed in defeat.

She floated to the ground and looked at Dipper with a huge sheepish smiled. "You also remind me of myself, with a better life." She shut her eyes while she grabbed her arm. "Sorry, sorry, sorry."

Dipper's mind went all over the place from hearing everything Kimmy had to say. He wanted to ask so many questions like her ghostly abilities, the Guardian itself who silence Kimmy for saying something about a cave it lives in, and what Kimmy said relating to her death. But between each of those thoughts, he couldn't help but think of all Kimmy's compliments which made his stomach ache and his heart race almost as much as when Wendy stands next to him.

"K-Kimmy. Let's …. Let's just sit down for a moment. Just sit here quietly so we can have a clear mind to speak with." Dipper sat down, sitting on a bed. "I have plenty of time. I can do my homework while you just lay down on whichever bed is yours."

"It would be the one you're sitting on. Never really that comfortable." Kimmy decide to sit down right besides Dipper. "Also I looked over the homework, I can help you if you want."

"Nope, almost finished."

Kimmy raised her head to see Dipper finishing up.

"Woah, you did all that in a few seconds?!"

Dipper smiled at her. "Oh no, I just finished most of it before our trip here. But I wouldn't put it past you if you thought I was that smart." Dipper felt a bit prideful as he completely finished his homework. "I'm a straight A student after all."

"So smart ….." Kimmy blinked quickly after realizing how she put that. "So ..smarter than me. I was only a straight B student at this place."

"T-this place?" Dipper looked at Kimmy. "This was your school too?"

"Yeah, a private school for us orphans. Classrooms are on the third floor." Kimmy pointed up. "I only leave this place if I want to be alone and earn some extra money doing some random chores for old folks. That's how I got all this." Kimmy looked at all her old belongings.

She took a deep breath and tried to make herself comfortable, but end up leaning on Dipper. "Oh sorry."

"No no, it's alright." Dipper said with a light blush. "If it makes you feel better …. Go right ahead?" Dipper wished he could be more confident for this moment, but what Kimmy said about him just made him feel like he was back at Gravity Falls where he just learned to not make a step-by-step list to ask a girl out.

Kimmy felt her ghostly cheeks heating up as she agrees and the two sat back to the wall and Kimmy rested on Dipper's shoulder (well head, due to cartoon design).

After Dipper awkwardly put his arm around Kimmy, they sat there for several minutes while the Guardian lay at the doorway, seeing that there is no danger anymore.

Dipper's heart still beat quickly as Kimmy nuzzled her head on his shoulder, but he felt right comforting her. Dipper glanced at the door and thought back to how Kimmy worded her death. He heard about the deaths of the convenient store ghosts and thought it was a bit comical and the lumberjack ghost which was just another reminded of how awful the Northwests are; but Kimmy here, he felt that he really didn't want to know how awful her life was, but how else can he help her.

Kimmy opened her eyes and noticed Dipper gently rubbing her shoulders. "He's so kind…" She moved her head downward and smiled, but quickly wiped it off. "I should talk to him now." She looked up into Dipper's eyes which slightly startled him. "So … anything you want to ask?"

Dipper took a deep breath. "If there's anything you're not comfortable with, just say so, O.K.?"

Kimmy nodded her head.

Dipper did not want to straight out ask about her death or the bloodstained room. He gulped as he looked around and recalled the opened journal. "So you've been reading my Grunkle's journal?"

Kimmy nodded yes. "I've never heard of Gravity Falls before, but what I've read about his discoveries and your adventures, it all sound so strange and yet … amazing ….. and stupid." Kimmy's comfortable face faded. "I mean there are this squid eagles and some flannel-colored platypus. Why, just why?" She asked in an angrily confused voice. "I mean I was very surprised to see fairies in this forest after I died, but that's normal fairy tale stuff, and yet there's a duck with its face on its chest? There's no way it can survive? And what about those mini-golf guys? Did they come first before golf-balls? Were they created by some witch who got bored?"

Dipper laughed lightly. "I know. I mean I love the paranormal and my time at Gravity Falls was the best I ever had, minus some dangerous and end of the world moments, but you should have seen this living stop sign I met who made it his destiny to have all cars to do anything but stop."

The two spend the next hour recalling Dipper's weirdest and hilarious moments like the man who Dipper only saw one side of, the hairless thing that ate his Summerween candy (which Kimmy found interesting that Gravity Falls celebrates Halloween twice), and many more light hearted adventures to cheer Kimmy up.

The two ended up laughing their hearts out as they tipped over from their spots, rolling with giggles. Dipper even fell off the bead and bonked his head.

"I-I wished I could see that. Gravity Falls must be the best place in the world!"

Dipper calmed himself down as he felt his bump. "Well, it does have its dangers."

"I've read about that." Kimmy sat up. "Like that robot lake monster, the pterodactyl, and that shapeshifter."

Dipper thought this was a good moment to ask one question. "Say, speaking of that, how'd you transformed into me anyway?"

Kimmy smiled as she reached out her hand. "Well I can't just change into anything see."

"Ow." Dipper rubbed his head as Kimmy plucked out one of his hairs. "But with just a little bit of samples." The hair absorbed into Kimmy's body and she turned into an identical copy of Dipper.

"Woah!" Dipper took out a notepad. "You are without a doubt a category 12 ghost." Dipper wrote down some notes, but realized something. "Say …..how'd you copy my clothes …. And why do ghost have clothes?"

"…. I don't know." Kimmy said as that question haunts her mind. "…Anything else?"

Dipper and Kimmy spoke about her ghost abilities as Dipper wrote down each detail. He could hardly believe he's actually having a normal conversation with a ghost. Kimmy on the other hand felt that this was some big interview as she opened up more to the boy who showed her kindness.

"And then I ripped off my face at some creep spray painting awful graffiti and he just ran right into a street light. I actually started to enjoy scaring any person for the heck of it, until I got some warning from….." Kimmy glanced at the Guardian next to the door. "That, but before I started school again I just randomly floated around the woods, making little contact with humans and other mythical creatures."

"The woods only?" Dipper asked. "So that means you never came back here?"

"Correct." Her cheerful mood faded. "And in case you're wondering, I died … before what happened in that room." She held her legs together in a needle position. "I always hated seeing actual blood, I got so scared that day I just couldn't handle it."

Dipper rubbed the back of his neck. "Sorry I brought that up. I'm just a very curious boy."

"So am I ….. but not a boy." Kimmy looked up and softly smiled. "Dipper, I want to tell you how I died."

Dipper gulped. "A-Are you sure?"

"Positive." Kimmy nodded. "I'm ….. I'm actually having fun with you …. I feel I can trust you." Kimmy stood up and held her arms behind her back. "If you can tell, I was …. A target to bullying."

"I've seen that before." Dipper said, not wanting to say he had it easy with just a few occasional bullying over the years and some other classmates mocking him for his birthmark or other embarrassing things, not counting Beethoven's attempts. "But if you decide to stop, I understand."

"Dipper, I don't want to go over my entire 13 years of life, but if you want to help me get to the other side, whatever religion that is. I should tell you ….. please don't let it be Scientology." Kimmy said to herself before taking a deep breath. "It all started one day, about 40 years ago."

(Flashback)

Kimmy was walking into the forest with two girls looking down at a muddy ditch which looks about a foot deep. The two looked at Kimmy with sorrow eyes.

' _I met up with two girls who bullied me since I was 5, but after we did a project together, they started acting more friendlily. And yes they did do equal amount of work, I made sure about that._ '

"Say Kimmy." One girl said. "We just wanted to … say sorry for calling you and your roommate freaks and stupid … I wrote one thing on that door! Just one!"

The other girl spoke up. "So ….. since you like mysteries. We figure you can help figure something out for us." The girl held out an old piece of paper. "We found this in the public library and thought it might lead to treasure."

' _I didn't believe some random piece of paper could lead to anything like gold and rubies on this side of the world. But that doesn't mean someone left a lot of American dollar bills buried in the woods. So I took the bait_."

"We thought it might be buried around here, but there's might be a code we're missing. And since you're clearly smarter than us ….."

Kimmy grabbed the paper and looked at the content.

One girl looked at some shovels right next to them. "We started digging, but realized how exhausting it was … we are not saying you're going to dig for us."

' _If they followed any clichés, I would have just flat out say no and walked off, but they were more clever than I thought.'_

Kimmy looked at the map with curiosity as the two girls slowly walked behind them.

"…..Wait. This looks nothing like a map of this region. Looks like it was just drawn over-" Without warning, the two girls pushed Kimmy right into the muddy ditch and laughed at her.

"Oh my gosh! I can't believe you fell for that." The two continued to laugh as they said some harsh things to the motionless girl.

"Now listen, Kimmy. If you don't want us to embarrass your friend ten times as worst, you're gonna have to ….. pay for protection."

"I'm sure shining shoes and cutting old farts yards sure do add a lot."

Kimmy gave no response.

"Hey, we're talking to you-you little goth freak!" That's when one girl grabbed Kimmy by the hair to raise her head, only to discover that right underneath her head, was a blood-covered stone.

She dropped Kimmy's head as both girls screamed.

' _I didn't die instantly, despite my fatal blow, but my mind was going. All I could hear was the two panicking as they mentions the police and making a bigger hole, then everything went dark.'_

(End Flashback)

Kimmy was now floating above her bed as she told Dipper her tale. "I know it was an accident, but ….. but I didn't just expect my life to end that quickly." She stood up and looked at Dipper staring at the floor.

She floated next to him to finish her story.

"It wasn't like I was going to be adopted anytime soon. I mean I'm a huge geek and adults give one look at me and move on over to a happy looking kid." She looked at her gothic clothing. "I've been bullied a lot throughout my young life, but I wear these clothes because I like them. I don't wear eye liners or have any skulls images, just black and purple cloths or whatever this orphanage gave us from who knows where."

She closed her eyes as she chose her next words. "I …. I didn't have a lot to be happy for, but that what makes the small things that does …" Kimmy silent herself from those thoughts. "But anyway, a while after my death I realized I was floating in midair all over the forest. I was scared at first and didn't fully understand what happened. Then I went back to the orphanage and found it completely abandoned."

Kimmy felt her arm. "I was too shocked to even go in as I tried to think how long I was gone. Then a random newspaper floated by saying that the orphanage was shut down after they discovered a child was missing, which was me, and discovered how awful the adults and kids are. Kind of funny this was left unnoticed." Kimmy gave herself a pity laugh. "But if you were pushed down all your life and afraid to speak out to our so called care givers, it kind of gives you a feeling to be quiet, always."

She looked out passed the listening Guardian and noticed the bloodstain and the body tape. "But the news didn't say anything about that. The investigators were probably never solved the murders and feared the masses would panic." Kimmy sighed as she slowly turned back to Dipper who still didn't look at her. "I'm sorry you had to hear that. It's just …." She looked away. "When you feel weak all the time and …..after you get a lot of power … I guess that's why I attacked your friends back there." She let out a small amount of tears. "I'm ….. I'm …."

Before she could say anything else, Dipper embraced her in a tight hug. "You have friends now….."

That was all Dipper said as Kimmy overcame her shocked response and started letting her tears quietly fall as she hugged Dipper.

"Dipper …. Th…thank you."

The two kids felt at peace, embracing one another, easing the girl's years of tormented memories.

They couldn't tell how long their hug lasted, but they were interrupted by the walkie talkie Dipper had. They let go from their hug as Dipper answered it, which of course Kimmy gave the small device a small glare.

"Hello …. Oh. Thanks for telling me." Dipper put the device away.

"Was that a cellphone?" Kimmy randomly asked. "Looks like a normal walkie talkie."

Dipper let out a small laugh. "No, but cellphones will drive this to extinction." Dipper laughed again. "That was Dyami outside. He said I was in here for over an hour. I should really get back home now before my parents have a panic attack." Dipper picked up his backpack and placed the journal inside. "So I'll….." Dipper looked around Kimmy's room and thought about the orphanage as a whole. "Will you … be alright here?"

Kimmy felt her arm. "Yes. I …"

"You don't have to stay here you know." Dipper gave her a soft smile. "You could try living somewhere more lively … no pun intended."

Kimmy rolled her eyes. "Mabel would laugh." She looked around her room. "This used to be a happy place for me, but ….." She looked at Dipper curiously. "But if I do leave, where should I live, eh stay? I don't think you will want me back in the woods."

Dipper quickly thought of a few places. "Well there's the park. Perhaps the fairy castle, well you're too big for that even if you can go through walls. Or maybe live with the Guardian."

The Guardian gave a small growl of disapproval.

"Scratch that …. Well I do want to help you pass on …." He didn't know why, but he felt extra awkward as he was about to ask this. "Maybe my place?"

"You're place?" Kimmy asked as her cheeks turned slightly red.

"…Yeah." Dipper smiled at the idea. "Well my parents would have millions of questions about a ghost moving in, so we'll keep you a secret like some dumb kids movie. But if you stay with us, we can help you solve why you're still here and help you get to the other side. Heck, we can play Dungeons, Dungeons, and More Dungeons after school ….. how'd you get registered in school anyway?"

"Politicians are that bad at their jobs." Kimmy answered. "Don't know how, but who does?"

Dipper laughed. "So, what do you say?" He looked at all of Kimmy's possessions. "And for the time being, we can help bring your stuff to my place. Like say a few mementoes or anything you feel right bringing. Though my folks would be suspicious if I come home one day with all your stuff, but I'm sure we can-"

Dipper said no more as Kimmy embraced him in another hug. "You and Mabel can have everything you want here! You're so great!" Kimmy gave him several pecks on cheeks.

"Woah there, I .. eeee heh heh." Kimmy let go as Dipper almost fainted from the small kisses before slapping himself. "I'm fine. I'm fine." He then felt extra embarrassed with Kimmy staring at him. "So … shall we go home?"

Kimmy gave him a smile she wanted to give her whole life. "Yes. Yes I do."

"Arf arf." The Guardian walked in which startled Kimmy, but the friendly look in her eyes eased Kimmy's fears as the fox looked like it wanted a pat on the head. With hesitation, Kimmy slowly reached her hands out and petted the fox and smiled.

"Thank you."

 **End of Chapter**

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* * *

 **A/N:** This will be the last truly 'emotional' chapter you'll see in a while, until we get to October in this story. The next chapters will be the usual one-shots and some relating to Kimmy.

Also I want to make this clear, this story will have dark elements to them.

But they will NOT be 'that' dark. I think I don't need to clear this one out for older audiences.


	46. Tad Bit Strange

**Chapter 46:** Tad Bit Strange

"It sure is nice to use sanitary toilets." Tad Strange said as he left his bathroom.

The most normal person in Gravity Falls was recently sent all the way to Piedmont because of some magic port-a-potty and ran into Mabel and not-really Dipper in the middle of a séance.

But after using one of the abandoned orphanage restrooms, which were surprisingly clean and had its own opossum waiter, he went to the bus station and rode all the way back to Gravity Falls, where he had tofu for dinner and went straight to bed.

It was now a normal Sunday for Tad, nothing to do but wait for the dreaded Monday to show its malice mug back to the world.

"I do enjoy Mondays." Tad said with simply happy tone.

He opened the door of his normal looking white painted house and gazed at the sunny bathed yard of his, which he enjoys doing work in his yard free of any weeds, trees or shrubs; just grass above the soil and nothing more.

"Grass is good."

After a relaxing walk around town, he stumbled upon Gravity Fall's own puppeteer, Gabe, as he teaches the younger children about shapes outside the library.

"This, my fine children, is a circle." Gabe used some chalk and drawn a circle on the sidewalk.

" _I can get the buzz 'around' that_." Gabe's bee puppet said as his book drew a square.

"It was funny when people thought I was a square. Outdated name calling is a fine memory." Tad said as he sits at a bench while Gabe started to sing.

"Being different is not so bad. Especially when you have a ….. ow wait." Gabe laughed. "That wasn't the song I was going to sing with my beautiful puppets. I haven't completed it yet to pure perfection in this puppet acceptant world."

"Why not Tad?" Tad suggested which sparked the creativity in Gabe's eyes.

"Yes, my puppets love it." Gabe said in joy as he sang again with the sunbeams shining down upon him. "Being different is not so bad. Especially when you have a Tad."

Gabe jumped on top of a fire hydrant and spun around.

"So don't be shy, and don't say a lie. Because we are gonna learn how to fly!" Gabe then looked directly into his puppets unfocused google eyes. "Fly into your heart. And there you'll find a tart. Just for you and …. Meeeeeee." And with that, Gabe started making out with his puppets.

"I thought the library kicked that boy out!" several angry and disturbed mothers said as they escorted their kids away from the creepy kids rolling in the grass.

"What a fine imagination." Tad said as he sat up and walked to the town square where he saw the founder of Gravity Falls, Quentin Trembley, inspecting his new statue.

"Hmmmmmmm. I knew it, this isn't made out of cheese!" the 8 1/2th president shouted. "Clearly this must be the work of the Anti-Cheese Association!" Quentin dropped to his knees and shouted into the heavens. "Where is the cheese that must be eaten to save the world!?"

"Over there, gentlemen." Tad pointed Quentin to a bakery with a cheesecake sitting behind a window.

"Why thank you, fellow American. Now I must eat the cheese and shoot lasers out of my ears to vaporize all the evil and their cement!" Quentin ran through the window and started beating the cake with a prime rib he kept in his pocket."

"Hey, someone's messin' with our favorite bakery!" Deputy Durland said as they drove the police car around with Gabe in the back, hugging his puppets in fear.

"First we have this abomination in our car, now this?!" The two cops leaped out of their vehicle to chase down Quentin who climbed on top of the store.

"It's no use, now I shall eat this cheesy cake! …. Or do I?" Quentin looked curious as the cake. "I do! …. I mustn't ….. I do!"

Feeling conflicted, Quentin leaped from building to building as the cops gave chase, but the failed to keep an eye on where they're running and fell right into a huge hole in a small park area.

"My puppets are free!" Gabe shouted as he ran out of the unlocked police car.

Blubs and Durland crawled out of the hole as Quentin escaped on a garbage truck.

"There he goes." Durland said with a daze tone.

"But we have another perp at hand." Blubs looked angrily down the hole. "Who dug this?" The two cops looked to see two people they would have never guess to be seen doing physical work, Mr. and Mrs. Northwest.

"Greetings, officers of the law." Preston said; keeping his manor look despite trying to hide his sweat stains. "You're probably wondering why we're digging in this random location. You see, we've discovered that our honorable ancestors have placed a treasure here. We figured we'll find it ourselves and 'donate' to the town."

"Oh." Blubs said with a smile. "If that's the case, you get a free pass."

"Nice to see some good deeds being done for the town." Durland wiped a tear from his eye. "Just to think, Blubs, Gravity Falls is going to get better when the Northwest donate that treasure."

"Yes." Preston said. "Like I said before, we will 'donate' to the town after we find that treasure, which will be in the form of riches. You will gain a profit after we-"

Then a golden fist punched through the dirt and out came a golem of pure gold. "Finally, after so many years of being buried, I'm free!" The golem climbed out of the hole and ran right to a sandwich shop. "I'm starving!"

Poking his head out of the hole, Preston slapped his forehead and shouted. "Well fine, I wasn't going to donate you anyway!" But then seeing the two cops standing next to them with their ears well open, the Northwest leaped from the hole and dove into their limo.

"Go Go! …. I forgot we fired the driver to save money." Preston walked out of the limo and sat in the driver seat to leave as the two cops shrugged.

"I need nutrients." Tad walked into the sandwich shop where the Golden Golem was acting like a glutton, making every watcher lose their appetite. "Hello miss." Tad greeted the woman at the counter. "I would like a single slice of bread."

"Seriously, what is wrong with you." the woman whispered to herself as she gave him a single slice of bread. "That will be fifty cents."

Tad took the slice of bread and sat at a table. "Now to enjoy this single slice of bread."

Before Tad took a bite, the slice of bread formed a face. You know; the usual routine.

"Hello." The bread said to Tad.

"Why hello." Tad greeted the slice of nutrient lacking white bread which has been granted sentience. "What did your parents named you?"

"Me?" the bread asked. "My name is Strange."

"How strange, that is also my name." Tad Strange said.

And so Tad bit Strange.

 **End of Chapter**

 **Qxa xka qeb pifzb lc yobxa xob xzqrxiiv zlrpfkp.**


	47. A Haunting

**Chapter 47:** A Haunting

"And that is why I think that all this is a super huuuuuge mistake!" Beethoven said to Dipper as their small group walked through the neighborhood.

After Dipper and Kimmy hugged, the two and the Guardian left the orphanage and were met with Dyami and Beethoven. Their reunion with Kimmy was silent and awkward as it could possibly get.

Dipper managed to talk with them and explained that she'll live at his place. Dyami still remembered her mentioning about her trouble passed, and having a ghost friend did sound like an awesome idea to him. However, Dyami did remind Dipper privately that Kimmy almost killed them.

Dyami was won over when Kimmy apologized softly to him and the Guardian kept a watchful eye and gave a friendly nod to him, Beethoven on the other hand wasn't too convinced.

"And what if she zaps your mom to an alternate dimension? What then?"

"Beethoven, she'll be fine." Dipper said to the frighten boy. "Also she's walking with us, remember?"

Kimmy was guilt ridden to see the two boys she scared the other day and wasn't really expecting either of them to forgive her. But after hearing Beethoven rambled about all the possible dangers she'll causes just made her more annoyed than guilt.

With a sigh, she rolled her eyes towards Beethoven. "And here I thought you were finished. Have any more crazy ideas I might do?"

"Uhhhhhh …. I've seen Ghostbashers!"

"Whaaa?"

Dipper walked in between the two to lower any more tension. "Beethoven, I trust her now. Also the Guardian will be keeping an eye on her …. That's what she said, right?"

Kimmy shrugged. "I'm actually surprised she can understand English. But I am not going to get on her bad side anytime soon."

"Speaking off…" Dyami took out a notepad. "Any news on the Guardian?"

"All I know is that she lives in a cave that Kimmy here have strange senses about." Dipper said as he glanced around. "But I wouldn't just ask her out front about herself. Especially since we don't understand fox call." He looked behind him and saw no sign of the Guardian. "Also she's still secretive, and I doubt Lightning would translate for us."

"A cave you say?" Dyami pondered about the cave and Kimmy's reaction.

"If you want to go looking for that cave, you can count me out." Kimmy closed her eyes and looked away in a somewhat snooty manor. "She can actually hurt me." She turned to Dyami with a small glare. "I was afraid of you guys finding out about me when we all went to ….. there, but not as much as the Guardian." She faced forward. "Best we avoid that cave as much as possible."

Dyami felt conflicted with Kimmy's warning, even Dipper felt curiosity biting his neck as he thought about the Guardian. But that is a mission for another day. Right now the boys are walking alongside an actual ghost who'll move in with Dipper.

"We're getting close." Dipper turned to the three kids. "I'll see you two later. I need to tell Kimmy some things before she stays with me."

Dyami nodded as Beethoven still felt worried for his friends.

"Well Dipper, you're more experienced in the paranormal than me. Heck, I should have made you leader of my club, but it's my club so no." Dyami smiled sheepishly. "But you're second in command and this involves your house. So I wish you luck." Dyami gave a bow and left for his house.

"You better not hurt Mabel." Beethoven threatened Kimmy, but the girl tilted her head slightly forward which startled the boy. "I-I mean it!" Beethoven scolded as he marched away.

"You know, at least he actually cares enough to protect your sister." Kimmy turned to Dipper. "And I did notice the way she looks at Dyami."

Dipper smiled. "Don't worry too much. Mabel's in that boy crazy phase and had plenty of crushes throughout the summer." Dipper realized something as he thought about the school year so far. "Though this was her longest crush yet, but she didn't try asking him out. But I'm sure it will pass and she'll probably try and get Beethoven or someone."

Kimmy cracked a smile. "Sooooooo." Kimmy rubbed her arm lightly as Dipper looked at her curiously. "You were about to give me rules."

"Oh right." Dipper said. "Now you know Mabel and I are aware of the paranormal and far more, but my parents aren't. They know about my Grunkles and the portal, but I don't think they're filled in on everything. Like my Grunkle's arrest, government involvement, and the end of the world."

Kimmy paused for a moment as she recalls the crazy documents she read and imagined his parents reaction to all of it. "So you want me to stay hidden then."

"Yes. Because I doubt I can explain it simply enough without freaking them out. Also if they learned at least one incident over at Gravity Falls, I may never be able to visit there, period."

"Understood." Kimmy nodded. "And if you're wondering about my ghost powers. I have good control ….. sort of."

"What do you mean, sort of?" Dipper raised an eyebrow.

"You see …." Kimmy looked away as she explained. "All those face ripping off, room shifting, forming dirt, I … well I was scared and crazy back then."

"I know. You're didn't have control when things gotten shaky." Dipper said. "Well our family is happy and there's little to no arguing besides Mabel eating the last cupcake I was saving. So nothing to get stressed over."

"Good, aaaaand." Kimmy waved her hand while she tries to think. "That was all new to me. I kind of just winged it."

"S-Seriously?" Dipper asked. "All of that was just by accident?"

"Yes. I did practice my ghost powers like shape shifting, shooting beams, and making a physical appearance." Kimmy tapped her arm. "But the dream, stretching my arms, all that other stuff, I just came natural all of a sudden." Kimmy looked up at the sun. "Heck, from what some other ghosts I ran into said; if I did manage to control that, it'll probably be very weak in sunlight."

"Which is why Ghost Harassers hunt ghosts in the dark." Dipper informed her.

"Oh, no. Just sunlight." Kimmy nodded her head. "And what do you mean by Ghost Harassers?" Kimmy glared at Dipper, giving the boy some chills.

"J-Just some ghost investigating T.V. show; who check to see if the place is haunted."

Kimmy guessed that whatever this show does was faked; but was probably still entertaining to check out.

"Rule number three." Dipper raised three fingers. "My parents would probably overhear us, so when they're home, we should just whisper to each other in privacy."

"No problem with me." Kimmy smiled. "Just as long as we get to play Dungeons, Dungeons, and More Dungeons."

"We could probably work that out, saying you're just a new friend visiting from time to time." Dipper smiled at the thought of playing the game with somebody. "And I've come up with other small rules which could give a ghost away to anyone."

Dipper read off a list of what he learned from Gravity Falls and Ghost Harassers which involves simple things like avoiding camera shots, no phasing through people, stay in cold areas when people are present, and don't answers questions being asked to no one and respond with whispers or moving objects.

"I can speak clearly and even set up a perfect card tower. Why would I do just that?"

Dipper didn't have the answer. "Also one thing, I would want to tell Mabel later and I think it's best you find a place to turn invisible and follow me in."

Kimmy looked over at an alleyway with a few large shrubs. "Sure thing."

After some more instructions on how he'll tell Mabel, Kimmy walked into the alleyway to turn invisible and followed Dipper to his house.

"Say, don't you have your own backpack and books for school?" Dipper whispered, trying to not sound like a crazy person talking to himself as he passes by some neighbors watering their grass.

"Yes, but I have a good spot in the woods." Dipper heard Kimmy's voice in his ear. "I also don't need sleep. Every morning I'll just meet you up at school."

Dipper nodded as he reaches the front door of his house. "Well Kimmy, welcome home."

Dipper opened the door and there sat his lovely family in the living room … watching a very embarrassing home video of a younger Dipper doing the Lamby Lamby Dance.

"Weeeeeell, who wants a lamby lamby lamby? I do, I do. So go up and greet your mammy, mammy, mammy. Hi there! Hi there!" sang the 4 year old Dipper on the T.V.

"That's my cousin!" Dipper randomly shouted, which caught his family's attention.

"Dipper!" Mabel jumped off the couch and hugged Dipper. "You made it home safe … to see our home videos of you singing the Lamby Dance Song!" Mabel winked at her brother to cover for his actual trip.

"Why thank you ….. sister." Dipper spoke with all his anger nearly locked in as someone held in some laughs.

"Meow." Waddles walked up to Dipper with Snake Eyes on his back ….. oh my gosh. I didn't do anything with those two since chapter one.

Anyway, Waddles sniffed Dipper as Snake Eyes the cat looked up at what appears to be nothing.

"Hey, son." Dipper's dad greeted. "Got your homework back?" He gave a sly smile. "From your cute friend?"

"What did I do to deserve this?" Dipper whispered to himself.

Snake Eyes continued to watch the empty space in a trance like stare.

"Hey Snake Eyes, what's up with you?" Mabel asked as the cat just stare, but looked the other way. "See something, girl?" Mabel asked as the Cat walked over to the side of the wall as its eyes slowly lowered, and then directly back up.

Dipper recognized Snake Eyes's behavior from Ghost Harassers and thought of a distraction. "S-Say, what time's dinner?"

Mr. Pines snickered. "Hungry already?" It's only 4."

"Oh …." Dipper sheepishly rubbed his head. "Sorry, just jogged all the way here. See how sweaty I am."

"That looks more like your natural sweat." Mabel pointed out. "Well your natural way."

Mr. Pines raised an eyebrow, which Dipper knew meant he didn't entirely buy it. "Alright, how about you relax with a good movie Mabel rented."

Mabel jumped up and down with excitement as she grabbed a blockbuster video. "It's called ….. gotcha', these things don't exist anymore." Mabel tossed the prop and instead grabbed a remote. "We're going to watch (place latest Disney movie here)."

"Shoo, shoo." Kimmy whispered to Snake Eyes who still kept her eyes on the ghost girl. She looked at the Pines preparing for a movie, which she was surprised to see how they actually set it up. Practically just like picking a show directly without waiting for its timeslot.

Still keeping her invisible form, she witness the family getting ready for a traditional movie as they set up some popcorn and set the lights low as they watched what Kimmy thought was a fantastic animated film with present day CGI she had only heard about.

She floated next to Dipper who was sitting on the left side as she enjoys the film and some commentary the Pines threw in. And of course when it got to a lovey dovey moment, she couldn't help but lean on Dipper, which the boy caught onto and shook a bit from shock.

Kimmy floated away as Dipper just glanced at her direction. She could tell in Dipper's eyes he realized it could have been her, but focused back to the movie to not make his parents suspicious.

Kimmy just floated back to Dipper's side. Dipper glanced at Snake Eyes staring at the open space and relieved himself as they finish a great movie and after a few hours they prepared themselves for dinner.

Ever since her death, Kimmy had no need to eat or any desire to do so, until she gazed at the marvelous and juicy roast Mrs. Pines set at the table with equally as alluring sides.

Her mouth opened as a small bit of drool hang from her face as Mabel made scrumptious noises as she took a bite out of some mashed potatoes covered in beef gravy. She even had thoughts of possessing one of them just to have a taste, especially with a carrot cake desert afterwards.

"That pig should be easy enough." Kimmy whispered as Mabel tried to serve Waddles a slice, but was scolded by her parents.

The ghost held herself over until dinner had ended, where she watched the entire crew work together to clean up their dishes and table.

"They're so lucky." Kimmy sighed to herself as the kids thanked their parents for dinner, and went straight to their rooms. "…. Wait, that's all they're going to do today?" Kimmy floated up to the second floor to see Mabel finishing up some homework which she cursed herself for not finishing sooner, and in the other room Dipper who was sitting at his desk, looking patient.

"What's Dipper doing? Shouldn't he be playing catch with his dad or helping his mother clean up?" Kimmy caught herself; this is a normal family that has been around for some time. No need to make every waking moment all about their bond.

Kimmy then realized why Dipper was just sitting around with nothing to do, he was waiting for her.

She didn't want to straight up appear and scare him, so she looked around for an object to move to catch his attention calmly.

Dipper started to flick a pencil on his desk, but noticed it stopped and started to rock back and forth. Dipper sat up and checked his door and saw no listeners, he slowly closed the door and walked back to his desk.

"Kimmy?"

Kimmy appeared in front of him and greeted with a smile. "Your family is nice."

"Yeah …." Dipper still didn't forget her first introduction to his family. "So anyway, tell my your thoughts ….. starting with the movie."

Kimmy couldn't help but let out a small laugh. She gave Dipper her full experience with their family (minus her leaning on Dipper's shoulder) and how delicious the food looked.

"Dipper, I never knew a family could be like this."

Dipper didn't understood what she meant at first, but quickly remembered she was still an orphan. "So you think you'll stay?"

Kimmy nodded. "Yes, and I'll be quiet. But what about Mabel?"

"Dipper!" Mabel knocked on his bedroom door. "I need help with my boring homework."

Kimmy turned invisible as Mabel entered the room.

The hyper rainbow loving girl was stuck on one final question, and Dipper is the only one to help. "Mabel, the answer is 45.009. A simple answer that can be solved by-"

"Dipper! There's five different letters in a math problem. Five-letters! As in letters you see in books! What are they doing hanging out with numbers again?"

Dipper gave her a playful laugh. "Mabel, we've been over this ….." He glanced at where Kimmy was before. "Uhhh Mabel. There's something I need to tell you."

"Are you the one who broke my favorite dolly in first grade?"

"No." Dipper told her sternly before looking out the hallway.

"Ooooh, this looks secretly important." Mabel smiled as Dipper closed the door. "Mabel, what would you say I brought home a new member of the family?"

Mabel gasped loudly. "Don't tell me ….. you have your very own animal sidekick?"

"Wrong again." Dipper took a deep breath. "Remember when I said I wanted to help Kimmy if she never hurt you or anyone else?"

"Yes." Mabel said without a clue.

"Well I figured I can help her better if … she moves in."

Mabel's smile slowly disappeared and was replaced with a concern and curious one. "She's here right now?"

"Hi."

Mabel jumped in in shock as Kimmy appeared right next to her.

"So … nnnnoooooo hard feelings?" Kimmy gave the most guilt ridden grin to Mabel.

Mabel looked at Kimmy with pure shock and then to Dipper with an irritated look. "Dipper, my I have a word with you?" Mabel didn't let him answer as she dragged him to the corner of the room for a private discussion.

Kimmy stayed put and could only hear mumbles coming from Mabel.

"Mabel, why are you just saying 'mumble' over and over?"

Mabel giggled a bit, but then put her serious face back on and spoke normally to Dipper.

Kimmy rubbed her arm again as she worried for what Mabel had to say. She looked away as Mabel and Dipper finished up their debate and walked toward the ghost.

"Listen here, miss ghosty." Mabel leaned towards Kimmy's glance. "You have a rough life and a very sad backstory. Also you almost got us killed. I just want to say …" Then Mabel leaped at her and gave her a great big hug, well tried to. She phased right through and landed on the floor. "Woospie." Mabel laughed as she picked herself up. "Welcome to the family!"

"Mabel, keep it quiet!" Dipper whispered to her.

"Weeelcome to the faaaaaamily." Mabel whispered.

Kimmy became physical and allowed Mabel to hug her. She slightly cringed at first, but later felt calm as she slightly embraced her, just slightly. Mabel then whispered to her ear. "I'll work on hooking you up with my bro."

Kimmy turned completely red as she quickly turned invisible.

Dipper groaned, easily guessing what Mabel could have said.

Mabel laughed as she wrapped her arm around Kimmy. The ghost however felt the energetic twin's arm tightening up as Mabel pulled her close. "But if you dare try to take Dipper away like that again and you'll get sucked right up." Mabel stern look quickly turned happy. Okey dokey?"

"Uhhhh, yes! ….. Sucked right up?"

Later that night, Dipper tucked himself into bed as he set his alarm clock for 7 and made himself comfortable.

Before he could fall asleep, he felt a hand touching his shoulder. "I'm still awake." Dipper whispered. Kimmy didn't appear, but the boy could hear her voice. "Dipper, thank you for showing me this much kindness before, without making it look too cliché."

Dipper chuckled. "You're welcome, and when you're up to it, we'll help you get to the other side." Dipper blushed a bit when he felt Kimmy's hand gently grasping his shoulder. "I'm happy already, so no need to get right to it."

Dipper's heart heated up from Kimmy's words. "And you'll be a part of our Paranormal Club, right?"

Dipper then felt Kimmy wrapping her arms around his body, which made him shiver as his face turned red.

"O-O.K. going to bed now."

Kimmy let go of the shaken boy. "Good night, and thanks again for being so great."

Dipper calmed himself down as he stare at the ceiling. "Good night Kimmy ….." Dipper noticed that he was staring at the ceiling longer than he should be. "You're just being nice and comforting to a friend and she's just being friendly affectionate. This does not mean you have a crush on her ….. Wait, I did ask her out ….. but that was before …. But then we hung out today and …. I need sleep."

 **End of Chapter**

 **Alk'q vlr grpq bkglv qexq mxoqfzrixo Afpkbv jlsfb? Vlr pelria txqze fq xdxfk xka yrv xii fqp jbozexkafpb xka ifpqbk ql qebfo plkdp tfqe kl bka.**


	48. Storytime with Soos: 1

**Chapter 48:** Storytime with Soos 1

"Hello, my name is Mr. Mystery." Soos was inside the Mystery Shack as he sat on a chair with small kids circling around him. "Since that creepy puppet kid got kicked out of the library, it is now up to me to tell you little dudes awesome stories with life lessons like how to open a jar."

All the kids cheered as Soos picked up a book of fairies tales.

"Today I'm going to tell you all my version oooooooooof"

'Little Red Riding Hood'

"For all the stories I tell ya, it will be rewritten by me with no profit involved, because the original stories are kind of messed up, dude." The kids gave him an odd look as Soos opened the book.

"It all started in the middle of the woods, where these is no electricity which also means no videogames."

* * *

 _(You see that single house there? That's where our story starts. I mean I don't know why someone would just move far out in the middle of the woods. There're bears, and probably no toilet. I would hate to live there. Oh, forgot to say this. I have my friends as the characters. That way I can avoid copyright, right?)_

 _(So in the kitchen, my awesome girlfriend Melody is setting up a basket, probably with something good inside.)_

"Oh Little Red?" Melody called out. "Can you deliver a basket of goodies to your Abuelita?"

 _(And in came our main character, Little Red Riding Dipper.)_

"Wait, what?!" Dipper looked at the dress he's wearing. "Why am I the girl? I'm a guy!"

 _(Sorry, thought this was more creative, dude.)_

"What do you mean more creative? Mabel should be doing this."

"Not this time, Dipper." Then Mabel poked her head out of the basket. "Because I'm playing as the treats!"

"Soos, I want to talk with my agent."

 _(No time, we have a story to tell.)_

 _(Melody handed Little Red Riding Dipper the basket with Mabel inside, and the boy in the red hood tipped over from the basket's weight.)_

"Couldn't you at least make Mabel lighter?"

 _(But then she'll starve. That is not cool, Dipper.)_

 _(Dipper used all his strength to lift Mabel up and take her out of the house, and then stopped for a rest.)_

"I seriously cannot do this all the way through the woods. Wait, why does Grandma live alone over there anyway?"

(I got nothin'. I didn't write the actual story.)

 _(So after a long trip through the woods, Dipper passed out from exhaustion.)_

"Guess I'll be sitting here then, getting really stale." Mabel looked at her passed out brother and poked him with a stick. "Will he be alright? I'm worried."

 _(Don't sweat it, Mabel. This isn't canon, so be as out of character as possible.)_

"Yaaaaay!"

 _(But not too much. People will just think you're being mean.)_

"I think I'm already doing that." Mabel continued to poke Dipper.

 _(While our goodie basket tries to wake Red up, from the edge of the path came the Big Bad Wolf himself, Gideon in wolf pajamas …. You know, with Mabel being the snacks, this will just make it far more creepy.)_

"Wait, what are you all sayin'?" Gideon was then picked up by a computer arrow and was dragged over a large trashcan. "Hey, you can't do this to me! I'll destroy you all!" Gideon was dropped in the trash.

 _(Well that's taken care of. I might as well replace him with Bill. I'll get more views with him.)_

Bill suddenly materialized as he laughed maniacally. "Well well well, what brings you here, Shooting Star?" Bill floated from the trees as he swings his cane around.

Mabel kept her mouth shut as she pointed to herself and to Dipper.

 _(Right, Mabel shoudn't be addressed as a person here. Wait, oh no! Now she'll be the target of internet hate! I gotta give your lines! Wait a minute, she already talked before. Huh, storytelling is more complicating than I thought.)_

 _(Hey look, Dipper is slowly getting up as Bill Cipher's shadow cast over him.)_

Bill Cipher tipped his hat to the boy. "Good morning, Pine Tree! I have an amazing offer for just a mere price of-"

"Just give me super human strength and I'll tell you where Grandma is."

 _(Gasp, Dipper. How could you!? You were supposed to be persuaded by this dangerous stranger so these kids can learn that talking to strangers is a big N.O.)_

"Well it doesn't matter with me. I'm not even the real Dipper Pines. I'm just a thought created from your mind with collected memories to make a personification of the real Dipper." Dipper raised his hair. "Heck, you forgot my birthmark."

 _(Sheesh, I hope the twins get cellphones soon. I'm forgetting their characters. Wait, does Mabel still like unicorns?)_

Bill Cipher tightened his bow and straightened his hat. "Let's get this deal over with. Which will be that I'll give you super human strength to get to Grandma's house while you tell me where that is."

"It's literally the only house on the end of this path." Dipper pointed down the road. "I mean literally the only other house there. One road with a house on each end. We got this place real cheap."

 _(And this is why you shouldn't shake blue flaming hands with strangers kids, like what my dog Dipper is doing. Well he said it himself, he's not the real deal … Is it summer yet?)_

 _(After shaking Bill's hand, Dipper received a buff body as he carried his sister in the basket all the way to Grandma's house.)_

"Well, time to eat a confused old lady." Bill floated at the speed of light all the way to grandmother's house.

 _(With a knock on the door, Bill was greeted by literally the greastest grandma on Earth, Abuelita.)_

"Oh, he-" Bill grabbed Abuelita and Bill ate her through his eyeball.

 _(Don't worry, she's fine. Not gonna let my Abuelita have a bad ending. Oops, sorry for the spoilers.)_

 _(With a snap of his fingers, Bill transformed his wears into that of Abuelita. Hearing Dipper's large footsteps getting close, Bill rushed into bed and acted sick)_

"I have human weaknesses."

Dipper punched the door open and summersaulted to Abuelita's bed with Mabel in hand. "Here's your gift, Abuelita, or should I say Bill Cipher!"

 _(Wait, you're supposed to do that 'My Grandma, big dot dot dot' scene.)_

 _(But's it's super obvious the grandmother was replaced by a wolf. Heck, this is just too easy.)_

"He's right you know." Bill said. "Also the deal only lasted until you got her."

"Darn it!"

 _(Settle down, you two. I'm the story teller around these parts.)_

Dipper sighed. "My Abuelita, what big triangle shaped body you have?"

"All the better to fill it up with human remains, my enemy."

"My Abuelita, what big hat you have?"

"It leads to the dimension of depressed baby monkeys!"

"My Abuelita, what big, single eye you have there."

 _(Bill then threw the covers off him and grew freakishly huge.)_

"All the better to spy on all dimensions and plot my domain which will free all worlds from the laws of physics! Also I'm eating you."

 _(All seems lost for Dipper, but then our random hero came in, Manly Dan. He yelled like a lot and punched Bill in the eye. This caused the Dream Demon to spit out Abuelita and hundreds and hundreds of potato chips.)_

"Curses, foiled again."

 _(Bill sat there defeated as everyone else enjoyed eating the potato chips, well except for Manly Dan. Apparently he had no idea what was going on and just punched Bill because he was angry that his favorite band turned out to be clones or something.)_

The End

* * *

"Huh? Huh? Huuuuh?" Soos looked to the kids for their comments and likes, but they all sat their quietly, really unsure what to say. "Being shy, huh. Well tune in next week or something when I have my next story ready. Or when I feel like it. Heck, I might just write something else and forget all about this."

"Mommy?" A small boy looked at his mother farther back. "What happened to puppet boy?"

"Psychology, son. Psychology."

 **End of Chapter**

 **Dxyb obpfpqba qeb mpvzelildfpq xka pqxoqba efp ltk jlsbjbkq ql prmmloq erjxkp fk ilsb tfqe mrmmbqp. Pxaiv eb fp xka tfii objxfk ql yb qeb lkiv jbjybo.**


	49. Presenting the Present

**Yes, I've changed my username from Godzilla2915 to GojiraCipher**

 **Chapter 49:** Presenting the Present

Monday is here again. People are back to work (unless they work weekends, how sorrowful), schools are back to there usual routine, and all the kids moaned from exhaustion, and teachers are miserable because of how low their paychecks are (especially if you consider that they're shaping the minds of the future).

Mr. Barney yawned as he read the list of his homeroom class and called out each name with a few 'yada yadas'.

"Kimmy whatever your last name is."

"Here, and don't have one, I mean here!"

Mr. Barney glanced at Kimmy, the serious looking girl in mild light gothic clothing which thankfully isn't full out darkness or whatever these kids call it. But today she sounded happy with a small smile to her face, however he didn't really care much because he has to go through a whole week on preparing these phone obsessed kids for a chemistry test which will just stress him out for the rest of Friday as he thought of all the complaints he'll get on the next Monday.

"Biggest reason why girls don't go out with me." Mr. Barney sighed to himself. "Second reason is my last name. So glad this generation would never sing that stupid song at me unlike ten years ago. Unless Mabel Pines brings it up."

Some kids just gave their teachers odd look at his irritated state.

After the headcall and their pledge to the American Flag (and also that crazy guy outside who kicked the Guardian again), the students talked amongst themselves before the bell rang.

Kimmy was looking through her schedule for today as he eyed Dipper Pines sitting beside her at the window.

Pine Tree was just staring outside, seeing the crazy guy being mauled by the Guardian. "Is no one doing anything about this?"

"He's the only human the Guardian harms; just because he kicks her every once in a while."

Dipper glanced over to Kimmy giving him a small smile.

"Good morning, Kimmy!" Mabel walked over to the two. "How's my two favorite dorks doing?" Mabel slammed her palms on Kimmy's table, staring at the ghost with big eyes. "I know what you did last night." Mabel booped her nose, which irritated Kimmy. "You stopped a burglary."

Kimmy gave Mabel an odd look. "What are you talking about?"

(Later this Morning)

Dipper and Mabel walked out of the house and noticed a man dressed in a thief outfit, eating their lawn like a cow.

"Moo."

(Present time)

"Mabel, I don't think that was Kimmy's doing." Dipper said as Kimmy nodded.

"I spent the entire night resting on the roof with my thoughts." Kimmy glanced at the other students for any eavesdroppers. "We shouldn't be speaking about this in public."

"True." Mabel then moved Kimmy's sudden frown into a smile with her two index fingers, and received a glare from Kimmy as a gift. "But don't forget we're buds now!" She moved uncomfortably close to Kimmy's ears. "And roooooooommmmmaaaaaaatessssssss."

Kimmy awkwardly glanced over to Dyami who was speaking to some students and Beethoven who she noticed was eyeing her with suspicion. Sighing that neither of them will distract Mabel, she sat there in defeat as Mabel hugs her.

"So Kimmy." Dipper spoke up. "English Class is having us look over other students' essays. Want to check each other's mistakes? That sounded weird."

Mabel released Kimmy and sat on the floor between them as he gleefully glanced at them.

"S-Sure." Kimmy glanced at her schedule to avoid eye contact. "Just to let you know, I don't own a computer, so I had to look through some old newspapers to check current events."

"You don't own a computer?" Mabel asked, before realizing why. "Oooooh, you lived in the woods for like 40 years." Mabel slowly gasped. "YOU missed out on all the 80s trends and every T.V. show and movie ever!" Mabel placed her hands on her cheeks with her mouth opened. "We need to catch you up on the times right now!"

"Mabel, we're still in Homeroom."

"After school!"

(3:00 p.m.)

"It's after school!" Mabel raised her arms in the air as she, Dipper, and Kimmy slowly walk out. "Today we are hitting the town, showing you what changed over the years!"

Kimmy looked at Mabel with uninterested eyes. "Besides doing some work, I never really had much of a ….. life, in this city." Kimmy looked at Dipper. "Is Mick's Deli still in business?"

"No, not since Old Man Mick stopped caring about being sanitary." Dipper said as they heard some complaints coming towards them.

"A toddler can eat a raw piece of chicken and still be fine!" An old man shouted as he walked with his grown children.

"Hello, Kimmy." Mick waved at the ghost. "Nice to see you not dead again."

The old guy walked away as the younger adults glanced at Kimmy for a split second.

"At least he still looks good for his age." Kimmy looked at Dipper. "So what about Arin's Comic?"

"Never heard of it." Dipper shrugged his shoulder.

"In my time, it was near the museum over at East Side."

Mabel and Dipper glanced at each other. "I think they torn down both place for a Flor-Mart."

Kimmy's eyes widened. "..T-They got rid of the comic shop …. And the museum?!" Kimmy felt her arm. "I kind of liked the museum."

"That burned to the ground!" shouted Old Man Mick from a distance. "Or was I thinking of our country's dignity?"

Dipper pointed behind him. "Well there's a new one over at West Side. Probably managed to save a few things from the fire and brought it over there."

Kimmy looked around. "Well do they still have phone booths?"

Both Dipper and Mabel suddenly laughed.

"Sorry, cellphones are the way of the future!" Mabel shouted. "Check out my cellphone …. We don't have cellphones." Mabel moped. "Should really push mom and dad to get us smartphones."

"Please don't end up being those brats who shout at their parents for getting them something with less memory." Dipper looked at his sister unamused.

Kimmy glanced around some students who have phones. At first she found it amazing at first, it was just like from some sci-fi movies she have seen, but eventually she lost interest at how people treats them like they're a part of their souls; and they gave absolute no care about their soul whatsoever.

" _He broke his arm and all they did was took pictures_. _At least they admitted they have no life book._ _Wait what was that about a book_?" Kimmy thought before tuning in back to reality. "Well Dipper and Mabel, I think it should be time I know what have changed in the world. It would be great incase I need to know for school."

"Perfect!" Mabel cheered. "Come on! Let's walk the city and show you the ropes!"

"Mabel, we can't go anywhere unlike in Gravity Falls." Dipper pointed out. "I say we go back home and search up the world on my computer. That why we will have time to do our homework."

"Boooo!" Mabel shouted.

"You do have a point." Kimmy smiled at Dipper. "We have assignments from both history and algebra. We wouldn't want to waste time walking around."

" _They're both dorks_." Mabel thought to herself. " _I shall wait for the right time to activate Match Making Mode._ "

Kimmy and the twins parted ways to avoid suspicion as Kimmy turned invisible in a hidden place and follow the kids as they got their rides from their father and were drove back home.

After a while, the parents left home which allowed Kimmy to appear and speak without being heard.

"So what shall we do first?" Kimmy asked Dipper as they stood in the boy's room.

Dipper sat at his desk and cracked his fingers. "You've used to a computer already, right?"

"Of course, but only for what the school will allow." Kimmy said as he floated next to Dipper. "Such as proper 'turning it on and off' and 'Microcomfortable Word 2010. When's 2012 coming?"

Dipper shrugged. "Well then let me show you a personal computer." Dipper opened his computer and showed Kimmy his screensaver of a perfect sunset shot of Gravity Falls.

"Woooaaah." She looked at the image with wide eyes. The ability to add a photo into a computer screen was exciting enough for Kimmy, but the gorgeous view of Gravity Falls just took her breath away, even though she no longer breaths.

"Dipper, Kimmy." Mabel walks in with Waddles and Snake Eyes with her. "Don't look at Dipper's history."

Dipper looked both irritated and embarrass as Kimmy wasn't aware what Mabel actually meant.

Snake Eyes hopped on a clear spot on Dipper's desk and stare at Kimmy as Waddles just sniffed her.

"Let's begin." Dipper opened up a browser and typed in some current events.

"Hey Dipper." Mabel said. "Did you write a musical number for this?"

"No Mabel. Nobody can just randomly come up with a song and expect the world to follow along." Dipper smiled as he showed Kimmy the advancement in technology.

"D-Dipper." Kimmy's eyes widened as she grasped the boy's shoulders. "A-Are those robots!?"

"Yes they are." Dipper smiled as he showed Kimmy pictures of robots. "They've manage to create complicated androids that can do task like speak and show facial features."

"Eeeeee!" Kimmy gleed before quieting herself down. "I mean, that's amazing ….. wait."

"And no, the robot rebellion is probably long away, well unless cellphones are already doing that."

"Shush, Dipper." Mabel scolded him. "Do you want a cellphone or not?" Mabel then noticed a video. "Hey look, dancing robots!"

Mabel pushed play and there were several robots dancing simultaneously to a modern song.

"… They better not wasted too much money for just dancing robots." Kimmy glared at the video.

"Trust me. They know what they're doing." Dipper said as he scrolled through more videos. "Besides, there are plenty of things more wasteful now."

"Like that video there." Mabel grabbed the mouse off Dipper and pressed a link to a cat video.

"Cute." Kimmy said without a sign of amusement. "Just a cat video. How about something popular?"

"They are popular!" Mabel typed in 'cat' and scrolled down through videos of cats. Kimmy's emotionless face slowly changed as she became dumbfounded by all the videos Mabel scroll through with no end. "How many links are ….. Over a ten millions!?" Kimmy's jaw dropped, which she figured that will happen every ten minutes. "And they can get all those views for just one!? How many useless videos are there?!"

Mabel was about to search, but Dipper stopped her.

"We don't have all year."

Kimmy sighed. "Please move to something else."

Dipper then showed her other inventions and discoveries around the world such as the hidden microbes found in the northern hemisphere, ancient cities found underwater, and new planets said to contain life.

"Any signs of space aliens?" Kimmy abruptly asked. "Like Site Omega in Gravity Falls?"

"None so far, unless NASA's hiding them like the lizard people." Dipper snickered. "….. Lizard people are real, are they … they're probably just snake people, or Sneo-"

"Hey look, a reference." Mabel pointed to a reference to a newspaper this article is based on. Dipper tapped it and showed an article of a crucial topic happening in the world.

"Wow, that's …. That's …." Kimmy couldn't find the word to describe this huge and important event. "You know, I've actually read about it and heard both arguments. Can I write in my opinion and-"

"NO!" Mabel and Dipper shouted, which spooked Kimmy.

"What?! I just wanted to state my non-100% choice on the matter and provide my reasoning that aren't being addressed and-"

"You can't!" Mabel spoke loudly. "People on the internet hate opinions other than their own and push down anyone who says otherwise."

"I don't believe you."

Dipper scrolled down to the comments and Kimmy read each one and was astonished. "O.K., that comment there has some wrong facts which can easily be corrected, and only receive one comment that doesn't straight out attack this individual but also shows his concerns and his opinions that makes a lot of sense …. Then the other people are just typing in hateful things as if they just enjoy being hateful! … Did …. Was I lucky at the ….. no. No I wasn't."

Kimmy glanced at the twins with a bit of hesitation. "S-Sorry I brought that up."

"Shoo shoo." Mabel patted Kimmy's hand. "This is a safe place."

Kimmy took a deep breath as Dipper looked through other sites involving celebrities, which only lasted a few seconds before Kimmy decided she wants nothing to do with knowing what crime they committed and how faithful their fans are.

"You are awesome for opposing that." Dipper smiled as Kimmy hid her light blush. "How about we avoid the real world for now and see what kind of movies and shows there are."

Both Dipper and Mabel smiled. "You are gonna love this!"

The first thing to pop up in Dipper's next search was a huge surprise to Kimmy. "There's a live action movie of 'The Adventures of Bib Bib'?! And there's one for 'Alex the Cat', and 'How the Brinch Stole Hanukah!?' I need to see them … why do they have bad ratings?"

"They are what you call 'cash grabs'." Dipper said as he typed in some other reboots and remakes. "Here are the actually good ones."

Kimmy smiled at some of her books she loved to read about being made into movies and T.V. shows (despite some of them not looking exactly like the characters they represent), she even had Dipper checked out current shows which Mabel pointed out each one and describe each.

"And this one is about love between a woman and a vampire, and that one is about love between a woman and a werewolf, and that one is about love between a woman and a zombie, and that-"

"Dipper, bring up shows and movies you like, please. Now!"

Dipper typed in his favorites and Kimmy was quite impressed with shows and movies which range from action, adventure, paranormal, and mysteries.

"And you should check this one out. 'Sol Against The Alliance of Bad'." Dipper pointed at a princess and her best friend who is male as they fought monsters. "Well it started out as simple crazy fun, but then this guy appeared halfway through the first season and by the end of the season, woops. No spoilers, but man how season 2 ended is amazing and I really!?"

"Sol and Mario are made for each other, Jessie Lee Johnson!" Mabel randomly shouted.

"Moving on." Dipper showed Kimmy descriptions, reviews, and clips of many great shows and movies which stirred the spirit's interest. Then came in one genre which looks nothing like what Kimmy have seen before.

"What is anime?" Kimmy asked.

"It's eastern animation." Dipper said. "Anime itself have many well devoted fans."

"Can I check one out?"

"Go ahead." Dipper moved his chair, but tipped over by accident. "Go right ahead."

Kimmy held in her giggle as she clicked on a random anime

.

.

.

.

"I don't get any of this." Kimmy said as she searches up more anime with complicated stories, over the top characters, and questionable concepts. "Literally the only one I understand the most is this blubber guy who wants to be King of the Thieves, yet he doesn't really do any thieving."

"Candy can explain better." Mabel said. "But why didn't anyone tell me these anime boy are so hhhhhhhhhhhhhoooooooooooooooooooooo-T."

"I swear if you start speaking Japanese only and dress like a ninja 24/7." Dipper shook his head. "Well Kimmy. We've looked thought modern discover like the Barreleye fish.

"Which is so freakishly adorable!" Mabel hugged herself.

"Went through current events where everyone just wants to have either a 'yes or no' for an answer like every Politician ever."

"I don't get anything." Mabel added.

"And looked over plenty of movies and shows that we have to marathon."

"He's going to play bad movies just to laugh at them." Mabel said to Kimmy who guessed they wouldn't be that terrible.

"And went over a few anime, which personally I'm not that big into."

"Candy once said to start off with DragonOrb first, the DragonOrb Y, and avoid whatever else Candy said." Mabel shrugged.

"So, what do you think?" Dipper asked Kimmy.

Kimmy folded her arms as he collaborate her thoughts on everything she had seen. At first, the twins looked kind of worried with Kimmy's puzzled and slight gloomy face. She took a deep breath as she looked at them with dead eyes.

"I've seen so much ….. and I know realized what I've missed all these years."

Dipper and Mabel looked at each other.

"But through it all, I've seen it for what it is and now I know …." The twins looked at Kimmy with hopeful eyes. "That humanity is doomed!"

The mood dropped like a plate as Kimmy just floated around, speaking her mind. "I mean really, all this is happening in the world and all people care about are cats and shouting mean things while hiding behind their little computer screens! Venom from a jellyfish could possibly cure cancer and people care more about some rich people mowing their lawn. I doubt they even know who the second president is. And these movies and shows, sure they look great, but most of them look like they just want money! Stories are meant to be Art!" Kimmy caught her breath as she floated down. "Evil outweighs the good. What else?"

"Oh, you forgot to mention stupid people getting away with crimes with only a slap on the wrist as punishment."

Mabel's last statement was the final straw. "I'm going full goth now."

"Stop!" Dipper shouted. "I … I forgot to show you ….. one last thing."

Kimmy glared at Dipper with an unconvinced look. "And what might that be?"

Dipper went to his nightstand and took out a small device. "This is a Mimendo 4DS." Dipper turned it on and showed Kimmy a game. "This little thing is in the category of 'Video Game'. It's like playing a movie on your own. Some can be simple like solitaire, while others give you a full adventure in a fantasy world to explore."

Kimmy looked at the portable system with doubt. "That sounds promising, but I doubt it can truly put you into their world like a book or a-"

(5 Hours Later)

"Kimmy. Please stop. You have homework." A tired Dipper poked Kimmy's head as she stares intensely at the small game with her tongue sticking out. "Kimmy ….. It's just Detris. Please put it down and do your homework."

"I'm a ghost, I don't need sleep." Kimmy answered without turning her head.

Mabel looked through the dark bedroom and sighed at the spirit who had caught up with the rest of the world. "You know, we should have done this first with Grunkle Ford. I wonder how they're doing now."

 **End of Chapter**

 **Qeb Delpq fp ofdeq xka tb xob klq ybqqbo qexk qeb mxpq. Tb'ob pqfii sflibkq xka clo pljb obxplk tb exqb grpq clo qeb pxhb lc ybfkd exqbcri.**

 **Mibxpb xodrb tfqe obxi mblmib pl vlr zxk dbq fkql obxi cfdeq tebob vlr tfii pbb obxi yilla xka yb pbkq pqoxfdeq ql x obxi elpmfqxi tebob qebv tfii dfsb vlr obxi mxfkcri qobxqjbkq xp vlr mxv x obxi jbafzxi yfii xka qebk dbq cfoba colj vlro obxi gly xka ybzljb eljbibpp fk qeb obxi tloia.**

* * *

 **A/N:** Soon, chapter 50 shall come. What do I have plan for this? You will find out soon ….. unless I take my sweet time and this ends up being a Hiatus, or I put this on Hiatus just for pure fun of torturing you. Bwa ha ha ha!

But don't get too hyped, it's a one-shot. And if I do go through with a Hiatus, it will probably only last a month or two.


	50. Fantasy Freedom

**Chapter 50:** Fantasy Freedom

Chaos… chaos has been brought down onto a field filled with war.

Screams of pure fear filled the air as mythical creatures ran down a burned field with remains of war machines and bones.

A dwarf fell down as another was about to help it up, only for the two to see icicle spears heading right towards them.

"What do you mean we're out of light beams!?"Shouts what looks like a Minator who looked furious towards some wizards dressed in armor. "Are you telling me that they did nothing!?"

"It happens every time." One wizard said. "He dodges everything we throw at him and he shoots back lightning. Speaking of which." Then the wizard was vaporized by a bolt of lightning.

"He's here!" Before the Minotaur could react, someone ran passed him, slashing the beast with a scythe by black magic, the Minotaur vaporized into dust.

The wizard knights just stood there in fear as the enemy strike down each soldier without much effort.

"This fortress is mine." The attacker looked over the horizon as more creatures fled. "Soon, I shall conquer my 100th land. And this world shall bow down to me!"

Standing above the fortress is a frightful warrior standing 7 feet tall dressed in a black and blue robe with images of lighting designs. He wore a grey-colored skull mask with glowing yellow eyes. His masculine arms stretched as his sharp boney claws aims towards two flying gargoyles as he shot gusts of wind to strike them to the ground. With his scythe which gives off a blue aura, he shot a lightning bolt behind him to kill off a troll that was about to attack from behind.

"When will these lower foes learn? They're not nearly as skilled as …." From a dark forest close by, the invader noticed a bright light. "Speak of the Devil." With a grin, the being sprouted two pairs of majestic angel wings from his back and flew away from a bolt of light shot at him.

"Little Leaf the Brave, where art thou?"

From the forest stood an average human-sized elf woman, wearing 'appropriate' forest-themed clothing, dashed passed the destruction of war and aimed a glowing arrow towards the intruder.

"Deathra!" The elf woman named Little Leaf the Brave shouted. "You shall never rule over this world!"

The skull-masked warrior named Deathra gave the girl a petty laugh. "You've said the very same thing when I have early on conquered my 50th land." Deathra flew around the elf girl as she shot more arrows around.

"Are you even trying to hit me?" Deathra noticed the smirk on Little Leaf and saw that all the arrows she had shot were just floating in midair.

"Magnetism Arrows?" Deathra sounded impress rather than concern as the arrows turned towards him and shoot simultaneously. "You've clearly had to find some good merchants to ….." Deathra looked towards the elf and noticed she was nowhere in sight. "Now where have you AAAAH!" Deathra felt a slash from his back, but saw no one. "What was …. Ooooooh." Deathra flew up into the air and shot a ball of ice to the ground. "Invisibility is only as good as your surroundings." The ice ball made contact to the ground and encased everything in ice, including the invisible Little Leaf.

"Baaah ha ha ha haaaak!" Deathra laughed as he landed on the icy ground gently and carefully walked towards the encased elf who struggles for freedom. "This world is mine and everything in it!"

With a claw incased with fire, Deathra pierced through the elf, vaporing her instantly.

"Baaaah ha ha haaaak! Baaaahhhh haaaaa haaaa haaaaaak! Baaa-"

* * *

"Every single time!" shouted Candy Chiu who threw her headset on the ground as she glared at her computer screen showing 'You Died' over Deathra laughing maniacally.

She dropped her head on her keyboard and sigh as she looked at the screen. "I've been playing 'Fantasy Freedom' for three years now and this guy is the bane of my fictional existence."

Candy leaned on her chair and swirled around slowly. "I've checked the ranking. Deathra is one of the top player who hadn't kicked the bucket since his early beginning. He decimated every player no matter how many attack all at once. I, on the other hand." Candy pushed herself back to her computer and pulled out an info box with her character and stats. "Little Leaf the Brave, which is me, is nearly as powerful as he, and yet I cannot defeat him."

Candy closed the box and squinted at Deathra who was now building mines and farms on his recent success. "Unless if I have a healer with me. I can defeat him. Buuuuuut, nobody here wants to be healers!" Candy slammed her keyboard. "Because apparently healers 'die' too much and don't get enough experience." He looked over to a photo of her with her two best friends, Grenda and Mabel.

"Sadly Grenda isn't into this game and Mabel labels this as 'Dork material', hmmmm. Maybe I should have asked Dipper for help. He's probably a huge gamer and never knows when enough is enough."

(Meanwhile)

"Enough is enough!" Dipper shouted in his room as she tries to reach Kimmy floating above him. "I told you only one hour of gameplay per day! Your homework grade average dropped to nearly .5%! Point. Five. Percent!"

(Back to Candy's room)

Candy sighed as she looked at her ceiling. "Too bad everyone makes fun of me when I bring up this game, and for those who don't, they refuse to be healers. If only there was someone who will play this game just to heal me and won't care about being attackers."

"Hey, Candy." Candy turned around and her pray were answered, well that was she automatically assumed as Pacifica walked in.

"I'm just here to drop off this …. Thing that I borrowed."

"That's a compass." Candy pointed out the small tool used to make perfect circles and measurement.

"Uhhhh, does this look like its pointing north?" Pacifica smiled, thinking Candy was just joking before noticing her computer. "What's that, homework?"

"Oh no. I've already finished mine." Candy showed her the game with Little Leaf the Brave in her home. "This is Fantasy Freedom. An online MMO."

"MMO?" Pacifica started to laugh like her old snooty self. "That game is for lifeless nerds!" As soon as those words left her mouth, Pacifica quickly shut herself up. "I am so sorry. I … that was an old habit when I tease you before!"

"Don't worry about." Candy said. "Besides, I'm too furious at Deathra at the moment!"

"Deathra?" Pacifica asked. "Who's he, the guy that kidnaps the princess?"

"He's another human being player." Candy snarled at his name. "For years he has grown more powerful and powerful with every piece of land he conquered and all the people he recruits or enslave."

"Geeze." Pacifica looked at the game with shock. "They let you own slaves? At least my family never owned a … they probably did." Pacifica sighed. "So anyway, here's your thing. I'll see you at school tomorrow."

Before Pacifica walked away, Candy called out to her. "Wait, are you interested in playing?"

If she had no intent on being a better person, Pacifica would have laughed right at her face. "M-Me?!" She was however quite shocked to be asked such a thing. "Sorry. I'm more into games with ….. physical activities. Such as Minigolf and recently soccer."

(Cutaway)

A frighten girl stood at the goal in a soccer game before a ball was shot right to her chest and pushed her into the next.

"GOAL!" shouted Pacifica as she run by in victory.

(End Cutaway)

"Mom and Dad aren't impressed that they have to help pay for medical bills though."

Candy held her hands and gave the rich girl puppy dog eyes. "Pleeeeese. Deathra is as arrogant as you were."

"Really?" Pacifica asked, feeling concern at what he may have said to Candy.

"… No." Candy sighed. "But if you play, you can be a healer. All you have to do is just throw me some items which will help me overpower Deathra and destroy him so other players can actually be happy. He deserves to die."

All Pacifica was expecting to do was dropped off a borrowed tool from a friend and probably chat a bit. She had little thought she would hear Candy liked this. She even felt frighten for whatever fantasy Candy had when Pacifica pushed her down in the past.

Pacifica gulped as she just blurted out her answer. "I'll give it a try." She really regretted that as Candy hugged her.

"Hooray! Let's get started!"

Then a montage played out of Pacifica training as Candy coached her throughout all different kind of exercises like pushups, jogging down a street, lifting rocks, running through a crowded playground, and chopping wood in the forest.

"Yes! Yes! Yes!" Pacifica cheered as she stood on the log with pride, towering over pieces of chopped wood. "You see that, Deathra! I am Pacifica Northwest. No loser tyrant is going to stop me!"

"Sup, dudes." Soos said as he greeted the two girls on his property. "Thanks for cutting extra fire wood. I think I saw a living campfire that eats this stuff. I'm gonna catch it and build it a dog house. But making a dog house out of nonflammable stuff will be kind of tricky."

Candy waved causally as Pacifica greeted the formal hired help of the hovel.

"What are two doing here without your friend with the deep voice?" Soos asked.

"And where was I when you all watched the season finale of Ducktective?" Candy asked Soos.

"Touché." The impressed Soos said. "But really, why are you here?"

"I'm training for a videogame to help my friend out." Pacifica said.

"Training for a videogame? That's cool." Soos smiled. "But uhhh why are you doing physical training for a videogame?"

Pacifica and Candy slowly looked at each other without an answer.

"…So should we just ….. play Fantasy Freedom?" Candy asked, which took Soos's attention.

"F-Fantasy Freedom!?" Soos randomly shouted as he dropped to the ground and curled up. "I haven't played that since Deathra took my kingdom!"

Candy walked over to the New Mr. Mystery and petted his head. "There there, Pacifica and I will destroy Deathra and liberate the entire Fantasy Freedom."

Pacifica just glanced at the two. "You two do realize this is just a game?"

"You don't understand." Soos started whimpering.

"Please tell me I won't be like that."

Candy stood up. "Don't worry, Pac. That only happens when you don't have a job."

"But I do have a job." Soos stood up. "It's just that …. I trusted Deathra."

The two girls looked at Soos. "What do you mean?"

Soos took a deep breath. "It was a few years ago, when I first met Deathra online."

(Flashback)

Soos's character, a large turtle knight thing, stood their peacefully until Deathra met him.

"Can I be a knight of yours?"

"Sure, dude."

(End Flashback)

"Then after I took over like ten kingdoms, Deathra became super OP and kicked me out. Apparently all the other players on my side liked him better. Guess I shouldn't have cut their funding like Mr. Pines suggested."

Pacifica looked at Candy with a bit of irritation. "If we don't beat Deathra after the first few tries, I'm quitting before I get hypnotized."

And so Pacifica and Candy actually started some training for the next few days between school and actually living their lives. They've sat there, tapped buttons, hurt their dry eyes, and even called in for takeout until that fateful day….

Wednesday, a middle day of the week meant for …. Being another average day. But today was the day they face Deathra and take back the land of Fantasy Freedom.

"Candy." Pacifica asked her friend as they start up their computer. "What if Deathra's not going to play today?"

"….. I don't know." Candy shrugged.

Candy hopped onto her computer as Pacifica logged in with her laptop and booted up Fantasy Freedom.

* * *

Little Leaf the Brave appeared in a forest filled with large mushrooms and a few woodland creatures staring intensely at their hands.

"Pacifica, I mean New Light. Are you here?"

Then came in a rather large fairy dressed in armor colored white. "Ugh, I can't believe what most of the outfit in here looks like for women!"

"Men clothing aren't that much different anyway, but everyone ignores it." Little Leaf said as two muscular male characters in loin cloths walked by. "Don't try hitting on anybody here, most aren't the same gender or age group."

New Light wasn't at all too interested, especially after some conversation with some uncivilized runts she would love to destroy in the real world. "Let's just get this over with before I get as invested as that person there." Pacifica pointed at a wizard typing in censored messages at some players. "Don't tell them I'm rich." She sternly said to Little Leaf.

"And don't tell them we're girls."

The two walked through the forest and fought with some generic creatures before they see a kingdom preparing for battle.

"Greetings, peasants." Little Leaf waved at some NPCs.

"Do I have to talk in outdated English?" asked New Light.

The NPCs told Little Leaf that a powerful foe is coming.

"Deathra….." Little Leaf said dramatically.

"Yeah, who else?" New Light asked. "Please tell me you don't want me to help fight other people after this."

Then a turtle-themed knight walked by. "Hey dudes. It's me, Soos …. Are you Mabel's friends? I'd asked like thirty players already."

Little Leaf confirmed their identity.

"Sweet, call me Turtle Dude." Soos did a pose. "The Mystery Shack isn't open because of annoying road work, so I had to return to my normal routine, but this is definitely not normal since I told you I haven't played in years because of Deathra. Boy I do sure type a lot. But strange, I feel as though that we're talking directly to each other."

Little Leaf and New Light looked at each other curiously. "So Soos, I mean Turtle Dude. Why did you decide to return?"

"Because I want to face my fear and-" And just like that, Turtle Dude was stabbed in the back by none other than Deathra himself.

"Greetings once again." Deathra waved as Turtle Dude dropped to the ground and evaporated. "I noticed you here and figured I will say my greetings before my over populated army demolish this little kingdom." Deathra pointed at the army of unified warriors charging towards the castle of unorganized players. "Between us, I think this kingdom is made up of new players and experienced players angry at the new players."

They looked over at the defenders who are typing angry nonsense at quiet people who want to have fun.

"In all honesty, I should destroy them. That way the lovers of wrath may quit and new people may join." Deathra suggested. "In fact, why not join me?"

Little Leaf was quite conflicted by Deathra's words. "You make a very good point …. I mean seriously. When anyone new joins, they get ridiculed and hated on constantly."

"Was that why?!" asked New Light with fury. "Do they literally have no life? Are they permanently joined with their computer that they burn in sunlight!?Rrrrrrrr, I am so going to digitally sue them! Can I do that in this game?"

Deathra let out a mighty laugh. "A healer with a sharp tongue. That's rare to see. Heck, a healer in general." Deathra looked at Little Leaf and New Light. "Is this your way of defeating me? I have to say, everyone here is too stubborn to play Healer. Even I find it as a boring choice."

New Light was getting irritated.

"But anyway, why not save another pitiful failure and join me. I don't do this often."

Little Leaf continued to debate with herself. "This doesn't happen often. I could be on the winning side for once. Also there are like several other leaders more powerful than Deathra, and there's that one guy who shouts about his opinions that is based solely on their emotions only. This could actually be a wonderful idea to join-"

"We are kicking your butt all the way back to the trash bin, now!" New Light shouted at Deathra.

"Nevermind." Little Leaf sighed.

Deathra looked over at the engaging army and smiled. "Well then let's settle it now." Deathra held out his claws and charged to Little Leaf.

New Light acted quickly and casted a wall spell to block Deathra as Little Leaf leaped into the air and stuck Deathra.

The dark wizard stepped back and grew out his angel wings to blow gusts of wind at Little Leaf.

"I got you, Leaf." New Light granted Leaf weight upgrades which allowed Little Leaf the Brave to stay put as she planted a tree.

"My little sprouts here will increase my luck." Little Leaf said with a smile.

"Then I guess cutting down trees decrease luck. That explains a lot in the real world." New Light laughed at the comment she made, which gave a good chuckle to Deathra, but at the cost of his focus.

"He-ya!" Little Leaf landed a critical blow to Deathra.

"Draaah!" Deathra flew into the air to avoid another attack. "How humorous of you, New Light. But I will not allow myself to be distracted in such a simple way."

"You know, talking too much about your evil self does count as distracting." New Light said as Little Leaf shot arrows into the air.

Deathra dodged the arrows and took note from last time as the magnetism of the arrows directed themselves back to Deathra.

Hey, if someone started this chapter and just randomly skipped to this section, they would be completely lost.

Deathra laughed as he drew out a large mirror with an image of a cat. "Don't forget the Copy Cat Mirror. I can copy any move you do."

"Ugh, so nothing original." New Light said, which Deathra seemed to like as Little Leaf threw a bomb that caused Deathra to drop the mirror.

"New Leaf, grab the mirror!" Little Leaf shouted as she fought hand to hand with Deathra who was all bent on getting the mirror back.

"On it!" New Light flew right to the mirror, but Deathra punched Little Leaf and shot a bolt of lightning at New Light.

"Hey!" New Leaf shouted at Deathra took the mirror back. "Why would you want to look at that ugly smug all day? I'm more pretty."

Deathra laughed, and was struck again by Little Leaf using a poison dagger.

"Don't forget, I can use poison too." Deathra stomped the ground and a pool of dark goo appeared, severely poisoning Little Leaf as Deathra flew away.

"Got your meds right here." New Light casted a status elimination spell to Little Leaf. "Ha, what you got now, Deathra?"

Deathra smirked underneath his skull mask. "This." Using the Copy Cat Mirror, Deathra used New Light's own spell to heal himself, shocking the fairy.

"You dirty little crook! No one rip me off and get away with it!"

"And what are you going to do, let Little Leaf the Brave fight your battles?" Deathra laughed as New Light grew angrier towards her opponent.

"Well I'll just go make a warrior character and-"

"Pay attention!" Little Leaf shouted as Deathra created a large thunder cloud over them. "I need speed stats, quick!"

New Light calmed herself and ran to Little Leaf to toss a speed increasing item to her.

Little Leaf took it and dodged nearly all the lightning and attacked Deathra.

Deathra was having a difficult time fighting Little Leaf and decide to use a cloning spell.

"Drats, not this cheap shot." Little Leaf shouted as she lost the real Deathra as he deflected her attack and ran around with the others.

"I'm me! No, I'm me! Not him, him!"

Little Leaf looked around and got an idea. She acted nervous as the clones moved around her, but then she used a Stop Watch item and casted it around her, freezing the clones.

"New Light, this spell doesn't last long. Charge me up for a powerful attack."

"And don't miss a single dork!" New Light used a spell to charge up Little Leaf as the elf girl held her hand out.

"Forest Forestation!" Then dozens of trees sprouted out around the clones which caused a huge leafy explosion.

"Bullseye!" Little Leaf shouted as New Light cheered.

"See that, that's what a healer can do!" New Light shouted as she became more invested in their battle. "Not going to walk right after that attack. Are ya, are … yyyyyyyou serious!?"

When the leaf cleared, all the clones remained intact, with a barrier surrounding each.

"What, what is this!?" shouted New Light. "Does he always do this?"

"It's …. It's not possible." Little Leaf fell to her knees. "He was still frozen and ….. oh no."

"Wee he he he!" Then a fourth player appeared, a short little shadow imp.

"Another healer!?" Little Leaf shouted. "Someone else was stupid enough to choose this character over a warrior! They really need to update this so you can have different characters for each profile."

"That sounds stupid." New Light said. "Wait, what do you mean 'stupid enough'?!"

The Shadow Imp laughed as it bowed. "I am Fire Shadow! You shall never harm my venn here!"

"Venn?" New Light looked at Little Leaf who only shrugged. "I think you misspelled 'friend' wrong."

" _Nor_ I didn't."

"Now you're just using bad grammar on purpose you annoying imp!"

" _We_ say otherwise."

"It's 'I' say otherwise!"

" _Gian_!"

"Stop it!"

The time paralysis faded and Deathra snickered as he clones merged to one. "Great job. Fire Shadow. How shall we eradicate the ones who stand in my way?" A dark aura covered Deathra as he created a large sphere of air. "Perhaps I shall tear you apart with my razer wind and then devour your flesh! Then I'll do the same to the remaining kingdoms of this world that dare to defy my rule!"

Fire Shadow laughed. "Better bow down or suffer. You have potential, unlike the others who-"

"You're characters look not straight!" shouted a random player, who was then evaporated by Deathra.

"Are that." Fire Shadow pointed with his thumb.

Little Leaf was exhausted. Her magic meter was low and who knows what Deathra might do to take down New Light. She looked at her small companion with grief. "This is the end."

"The End …. No it is not!" New Light walked forward to Deathra who was ready to unleash a wind of death. "You think you're so tough because you've been playing this game for a long time. Well I got something for ya, I'm actually not a geek at all. In fact, I'm a rich and beautiful GIRL!"

Little Leaf gasped. "No, you'll get-"

"I'm just doing all this because I wanted to help my new friend here who I have been mean to all these years. Heck, everyone here is imagining this as some epic showdown while I still see this as some blocky people taking turns to swing a punch!"

"New Light, you shouldn't-"

"And you know what; I'm actually kind of having fun. Sure sports still beat this any day, but my dominate nature is never going away to any opponent I face. So give me all you got!"

"Sure thing." Then some random player appeared. "But first you go make me a sandwich, girl!" Then a whole bunch of players appeared shouting at New Light about what else would you expect after she just said she's a girl.

"This is why I always pretend to be a boy here." Little Leaf said as New Light was getting more and more comments.

"No wonder why geeks are losers at love." New Light said as more and more players appeared, before they were all wiped out by a powerful gust of wind of justice, and half of their valuable loots dropped.

"What the?" Little Leaf and New Light said in awe as Deathra and Fire Shadow walked to the loot. "They should have returned to their base to drop these off." Deathra looked at Little Leaf and New Light. "I say these should belong to you."

Our heroes looked at Deathra with suspicion.

"I get it. Come, friend. We're leaving."

The shadow imp nodded as they teleport away.

Little Leaf knew that they went to a warp point which was nowhere near their location, so she looked at the dropped loot with amazement. "You have to have a mining level of 100 to find these, and I'm only at 20!" The greed hungry elf took almost everything as New Light took the scraps which she didn't care for anyway.

"Was he always that generous?" New Light asked Little Leaf.

"To his opponent, no." Little Leaf looked at her inventory. "But why would he do this for us? Let's find him and asked."

And so our heroes warped to a town Deathra left to and found the dark warlock himself standing at a fountain with Fire Shadow.

"Deathra." Little Leaf spoke firmly. "Why did you allow us to retrieve that treasure?"

Deathra and Fire Shadow looked over to the two. "Little Leaf, we are still sworn enemies. But I did felt empathy for your friend." Deathra looked at New Light. "No one ever chooses to be healer in this realm, and yet not only did you decide to be that class, you are also a …. G word." Deathra whispered. "In truth, I am male in real life, but I find that language disgusting. But not as nearly as just random curse words."

New Light smiled. "What a Gentlemen. And here's something I don't do often, I am allowing you to kiss my hand … what button is that?"

With Little Leaf's help, New Light offered her hand and Deathra gently kissed it.

"I hope you're not some grown up creep."

Deathra laughed. "Well I wouldn't call us creeps, but one of us is pretty old."

Fire Shadow laughed. "Of course we can't reveal ourselves in this game."

"It's true." Little Leaf turned to New Light. "Our privacy on the internet is very important."

"Is that our moral of the day?" New Light smiled. "Up next, we will tell you all why eating dirt is unhealthy."

"If only people actually follow such internet rule." Deathra laughed. "I have to say, that was a close match."

"It was indeed." Little Leaf said. "It was the closest I have ever gotten. But it looks like you had the same idea."

Deathra looked at Fire Shadow. "My friend here is new actually. If given the chance, you could have defeated Fire Shadow in one hit. I needed a couple of hits to take down your friend with the sharp tongue."

"Trust me, I can easily say a lot more during our fight." New Light smiled, but felt the memories of her old self coming to mind. "So I guess we couldn't stop you from conquering your 100th kingdom."

"Not exactly." Deathra said. "You see, when we had our fight, half of my empire revolted and the rest were taken over by the other stronger players …. Who were then all wiped out by dragons … how else would they keep this game balanced?"

Little Leaf let out a mighty laugh. "I remembered why I don't conquer anything." She looked over to her friend. "So, New Light, what do you think of this game overall?"

New Light tapped her mouth. "In truth, I really did have fun …. Buuuuuuut. It's not worth listening to those freaks. And this game is too time consuming."

Deathra grunted. "I know; which is why I always set up a schedule for myself. Which is ending soon." Deathra held out his hand. "So I guess this is our last meeting."

New Light and Deathra shook hands.

"Such a shame." Deathra smiled. "Your attitude is actually quite attractive … but I am not going to hook up with what may actually be a middle aged man."

New Light laughed. "And you might be some creepy old lady who eats people."

Everyone shared a heartwarming laugh.

"Well it's time for me to go." Deathra looked to the sun. "This may be the end, but not the end of our rivalry and fun. Mostly just fun because this is just a game after all."

"I know. You won't see me getting too invest in all of this." Little Leaf said; which received a huge glare from New Light.

Deathra held his arms out. "Be strong, and always remember the most important thing. That in this world ….. I AM SUCH A SUPER DORK! DU-DAH! DU-DAH!"

Both Little Leaf and New Light gave the bringer of death an odd look as he waved his arms in defense.

"Please ignore that! That was just MY PARANOID IMAGINATION! I'M CRAZY AND I EAT ROCKS AND PAINT HOUSES WITH PEPPERMENT CANDY AND-"

* * *

"Maaaabel!" Dipper Pines pushed his sister off his keyboard with Kimmy to his right. "I've told you plenty of times to not disturb me when I'm playing Fantasy Freedom!"

Mabel picked herself up as she sees Dipper playing as Deathra talking to Little Leaf and New Light. "I'm making sure you get a real girlfriend. And it's not like that fairy in the game will be your gal anytime soon."

Dipper groaned as Kimmy folded her arms and defended her friend. "Dipper has control, Mabel. He won't get that attached to-" Kimmy then tried to lunge at the keyboard, but Dipper quickly logged himself off along with Kimmy's character, Fire Shadow.

"And you ran out of play time." Dipper playfully scolded Kimmy. "Also, you're not going find my videogames even if you tear this house down."

"They're buried next to our cherry tree!" Mabel randomly shouted.

"Mabel!"

Before Dipper could chase after Kimmy, Mabel shouted again. "Say Dipper; remember when you had that videogame guy come to life?"

"Yes." Dipper answered as he recalled his overly rash bodyguard.

"Can you do the same with this?" Mabel logged onto Fantasy Freedom.

"Mabel, I doubt that it will work ….. how'd you guessed my password?"

"I guess everything I come across." Mabel smiled. "Now let's see here." Mabel entered the Code of Ultimate Power onto the screen. "Aaaaaaand enter!"

And in a flashing light, the characters from Fantasy Freedom appeared in Dipper's room.

"Of course, why not." Dipper said as he glared at all the confused characters. "Now we have to get them all back in."

"Or better yet." Mabel smiled. "Let's have a sleepover!"

Throughout the night, Dipper had to sit in agony around a circle of mythical warriors having tea parties and reading vampire romance novels, including his very own creation, Deathra.

"Mabel, you do realize it's a school night?"

"Yes I do!" Mabel said as everyone chanted Mabel to jug a gallon of Mabel juice.

Dipper looked next to him to see Kimmy entranced in a game as he leaned his head on his hand and sigh. "And our parents are where?"

 **End of Chapter**

 **Kbt Ifdeq xka Cfob Pexalt'p ifqqib doxjjxo xodrjbkq exp jlob jbxkfkd qexk vlr qefkh, xka jxvyb jlob.**

 **Thanks, Keeper of the World, for that Code of Ultimate Power joke. Also I have nothing against healers in games.**


	51. Sheriff and Deputy

**Chapter 51:** Sheriff and Deputy

"Take that, society!" Robbie said as he spare painted an explosion (muffin) on the side of a building and ran away. "You'll never take me alive, coppers!" Then Robbie ran right into a pole.

A few feet away, Sheriff Blubs and Deputy Durland were enjoying a cup of coffee at a café, completely oblivious to Robbie's doings and that he now lays on the ground motionless.

"Woo-YE! I love a good cup of coffee during the afternoon!" Deputy Durland said joyfully as he sits next to his most favorite person in the world, Sheriff Blubs.

"Especially when you dip little donuts in them."

Both cops took out powdered donuts. "Ready?"

"3….2…..1… DIP 'EM!"

Both cops dunk three donuts into their coffee and slurped the whole thing.

"Did someone say Dipper?" Soos randomly walked into the scene, looking around. "Dipper? Are you here dude? ….. Guess not." The New Mr. Mystery moped and slowly walked away. "Hey Robbie. Oh, sorry. Didn't know you're sleeping."

The two cops watch Soos walk away from the unconscious Robbie who they were still oblivious to. "You know, he's doing a real good job at being the new Mr. Mystery." Durland said to his best buddy.

"I'll say. Ever since Stanford, I mean Stanley Pines retired to become a true adventurer, Soos there been making the place much better."

"I got a T-Shirt at a fair price!" Durland held up a T-Shirt which displayed the glory of Stanley Pines with a picture of his smiling face. "When I worked there, I didn't get anything at a fair price. In fact, I stunk at my job."

"Wait, when did you work there?" Blubs said as he sips his coffee.

Durland scratched his chin. "About ten years ago. I used to be the handy man until I set the ice cream cooler on fire. Stan told me to scram and I did. I scrammed all the way until I bumped into-" Durland paused as a grin grew larger and larger. "You, and that was also ….."

"Our first time meeting!" Both shouted with joy.

"Oooooh, wha?" Robbie woken up, still feeling woozie.

The two cop buddies began girly out or something. "Wanna tell out origin story together?" Durland asked with google eyes.

"Quit reading my mind!"

* * *

(Ten Years Ago)

" _So there I was, sitting on a bench in town after being fired_." Durland said as his teenaged-self sat there in the park, being miserable.

With his heads resting on his hands, Durland sighed. "I always get fired at everything." He sighed as a balloon man walked by. "Even living and talking balloon guys have jobs."

Then a couple of Blind Eye members popped out of the shrubs. "Didn't look like he noticed that one." They both shrugged and jumped back into the shrubs.

"If only there was a job opening."

" _And this is where I come in."_ Officer Blubs said. " _I was walking by with … now who was that again_?" Blubs thought. "I wanna say a superhero. But I don't recall a cape flapping in the _**WIND**_."

" _I say we make him a stick figure superhero named Super erh, Super._ " Durland said.

" _Super Super it is_."

Walking down the sidewalk came two characters. One of which was the town's very own ten year younger Sheriff Blubs.

" _Oh don't say that, you still look young."_

" _Why thank you, Durland!"_

Walking besides next to Blubs, was Gravity Falls's very own ….. Super Super, the stick figure person that …. I dunno, make swords appear out of thin air.

"Blubs, this is a serious matter." Super Super said in a soft voice. "Look, I'm having less and less time watching over this town, and you ….. yooooooooou still need practice." Super Super said in a calm way, which wasn't what he meant at all.

Blubs laughed as he flexed his arm. "I may not be Sheriff yet, but just wait till they see me in action as I uncover our secret assignment and make sure it stays secret."

"The government told me as well." Super Super said. "But that is the least embarrassing thing I've seen from this country. I'm having a feeling that soon people will go overboard with their 'feelings' and make the content of this mission look like a renaissance artwork." Super Super folded his arms. "But you're literally the only officer in this town who's not close to retirement. What you need is back up."

"Back up you say?" Blubs rubbed his chin. "As in a buddy buddy cop? A partner in no-crime? BFFs?"

"Yyyyyyeah, that." Super Super said as he scratches his head. "And during last Summerween's bobbing for tomatoes tournament, you allowed your mother to enter, who was having that weird mouth infection people made fun of, I'll look for a worthy choice. But that was still sweet what you did for your mother, Blubs. Even though it was a complete health hazard and you should have been punished for it."

" _Super Super is so smart about you._ "

" _Oh shucks._ "

Super Super looked around the city to find a potential cop from the colorful folks of Gravity Falls.

"Tats the tattoo guy? No, he doesn't look to friendly."

"The Pool director? Naw, he loves that pool too much, really too much."

"Old Man McGucket? Ha …. What happened to him, anyway?"

"Tyler Cutebiker? ….. For some reason I see him more as a politician …. A good one."

"Tad Strange? I bit of a strange choice, to say."

"Bud Gleeful? I swear his newborn baby will dominate over him."

"Manly Dan? And have less time with his family, I think not."

"The Northwests? Over my dead body after I was stabbed, ran over, starved, and then thrown in a furnace!"

Super Super pondered and pondered. "This is harder than I thought. Even I have little time left today. Now who can be a perfect officer of the law?"

Durland was sitting right up, listening in on their conversation the best he could. " _I dunno what got me interested. I only heard that Super Super needed someone for a job. So I straighten myself up and marched right towards._ "

" _That is probably destiny._ "

" _That must be it!_ "

Durland marched right to the two and greeted them formally. "I reckon I can fill the role?"

Before Super Super can say anything, Blubs gasped in amazement. "I think I read this in my horoscope!" Blubs took out a newspaper as Super Super looked annoyed.

"Blubs, trust me on this. That horoscope thing is a scam. You could say that elves, unicorns, and multiple bears formed together have a better chance at-"

"My horoscope says that a stranger will appear for a special job, then something greater than you can imagine will happened!"

" _I wish I can keep that a mystery, but we both know the outcome."_

" _Our friendship._ " Durland said in a sweet voice.

With a huge grin, Bulbs patted Durland on the shoulder. "You're hired!"

Deep inside, Durland had found that spark he lost ever since Mr. Pines fired him an hour ago or maybe longer.

" _Actually I don't recall when all this happened after I lost my job at the Shack._ " Durland said. " _But that was all in the past!_ "

"Blubs." Super Super said in a stern voice, but kept his irritated mood in check. "I told you that I'll find you a partner."

"And I just made your job ten times easier." Blubs looked at Durland with excitement. "Now let me show you the ropes!"

"But Blubs!" Super Super blocked cop from his new apprentice. "It takes years of training to become an officer. And he's a teenager! Teenagers are these … hormone things that yell a lot and be moody and hang out with friends on a school night!"

"Hey, I don't have a teenager and you don't see me worrying." Blubs gave Super Super a pat on the back as he walks away with Durland. "Do you have teenagers? I don't think so ….. yeah. I'm sure you don't have teenagers or something. You'll be stressed 24/7."

"But I …." Seeing the two walk away, Super Super sigh in defeat. "This will probably only last a day. I doubt this town will allow an untrained child to protect this … oh yes they will." Super Super folded his arms. "We really need to have Mayor Befufftlefumpter consider retirement and have a fresh mind take his place. Should really put in some time to relax before the Grim Reaper comes ….. I should stay close so I can punch that bag of bones right in the face!"

Through the small town where a purse napping was happening, the cop and recruit walked casually in the lively town. "So you want to be a cop Mr. ….. I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name."

"Oh, well I'm Edwin Durland. But you can call me Durland."

"Nice to meet you, Durland. I'm the man who keeps the law in check in this town. Officer Daryl Bulbs. And just like you, you can call me by my last name, Blubs."

"Well it sure is great to meet an officer." Durland smiled with joy.

"Yes, and when the old Sheriff retires, I'll be the new Sheriff." Blubs smiled as Durland oooowed. "This town's criminal scum won't know what's coming. Officer Blubs will catch and perpetrators and lock 'em up in the old Gravity Falls prison."

Durland looked at a parked car. "Like that one." Blubs looked at the car and gasped. "Great eye, this car is parked an inch too far from the curb!" Blubs warned Durland to stand back. "Now you stay here and watch with all your eyes focus on me."

"You got it!" Durland held his eyelids open as Blubs dashed to the car and narrowly passed slow moving pedestrians. "Aaaaaand, fine!" Blubs slapped a parking ticket on the car. "Can't do the time, don't do the crime."

The owner of the car came in and it was none other than Stan Pines who looked furious at the damage to his wallet. "One whole penny!? You're a crook!" Acting swift on his feet, Stan leaped into his car and flor it.

"He's getting away!" Durland shouted. "What do we do!?"

"This!" Blubs pulled out his keys and unlocked his car ….. which was somewhere far. "Woops. I was walking with Super Super before." Bulbs and Durland noticed Stan passing through a red light and causing a few crashes. " And he got away! Drats." Blubs kicked the ground. "If only we know who that was."

"That was Mr. Pines!" shouted Super Super from somewhere off screen.

Durland thought and thought hard, and came to a realization. "That was my old boss. Mr. Pines."

"Mr. Mystery of the Mystery Shack, of course!" Blubs bounded his palm, as Super Super sigh painfully. "After I find my car, we are going straight to the Mystery Shack and see to it that Mr. Pines pay that pretty penny."

"This town needs to get rid of that penny fine for parking too far!" shouted Super Super. "BARELY too far!"

Blubs and Durland found Blub's cop car near an ice cream parlor. "Come Durland, when I get my hands on Pines, I'll show you how to ooooooh, they have new flavors."

"Yipee!"

(30 Minutes later)

"Here we are." Blubs and Durland parked at the Mystery Shack, with ice cream smears on their faces. "Now this is a difficult procedure. It must be handled calmly and HE'S GETTING AWAY!" Blubs ran towards the nearest person and started shouting. "Hands in the air, Pines!"

The person raised their arms as high as he could. "Sorry, dude. I ….. I'm a Pines? Wait, did Mr. Pines adopt me?"

Blubs got a good look at the person. "False alarm. You're just a kid."

Durland caught up and saw little Soos with his arms still high up. "Mr. Pines just hired me to fix stuff. Look at the good job I did with the ice cream machine." Soos pointed inside to show the two the functioning and non-flaming ice cream cooler.

"Aww, even a kid is better than me." Durland sat on the porch and moped. "I stink at everything."

Blubs removed his sunglasses to reveal wide opened eyes as he has multiple flashbacks of his past which involves building house of cards, coloring a picture, writing a poem, and cooking a meal. But each one has the same ending, someone telling the boy that he stinks. Most likely because he was a young kid at those time and was covered in dirt.

Blub's let out a single tear he wiped away and swiftly turned serious. "Now you listen here, Durland." Blubs placed his hands on Durland's shoulders. "I only known you for not even an hour, but I can tell that you still have potential."

Durland's eyes started to get teary as Blubs continued.

"Deep down, you can unleash your inner strength and achieve something better than you already tried. Now dig deep and find your strength!"

"You can do it, dog!" cheered young Soos.

Durland looked Blubs with his supportive side and smiled. "You're right!" Durland stood straight up. "I need to dig deep and find my strength! You gotta shovel?"

"Right here."

So both Blubs and Durland literally dig deep into the ground to find the inner strength, as Stan Pines walked into the scene. "That was the most basic motivate speech I heard … and yet." Stan checked his heart. "Great, that ….. conscious thing is telling my boring stuff again." Stan punched his chest, but it was no use. "Well you need to break a few eggs to make an omelet." Stan dug through is pocket and took out a penny. "Well …. This is goodbye." Stan sniffed and dropped the small piece of copper in the hole. "….. You go and live your dream."

Stan walked away as young Soos looked down. "Goodbye, Mr. Penny. Don't forget to be awesome."

In the hole, Durland felt something hit his head. "What's this?" Durland picked something up and gasped. "The penny!"

Blubs gazed at the small worthless coin in aww. "This is a sign. You are a true cop!"

"I'm a true cop!" Durland leaped out of the hole with pride. "This calls for a celebration."

"Joy ride?" Blubs poked his head out of the hole as Durland held his hand out.

"Yes sir!"

Blubs grabbed his hand and Durland pulled him out.

"Cop Buddies of Life!"

And so they leaped into their cop car and drove towards the sunlight, breaking as many road laws as possible without seriously injuring or killing anyone.

"Wait, was that it?" Super Super popped out of nowhere. "That's how it ends? Just a short time of them goofing off and figuring out that a potential friendship is the greatest gift of all …. Whatever. I mean this place doesn't get too dangerous ….. in town that is."

* * *

(Present)

"Say, how'd you know what Super Super said when we were already miles away?" Durland asked his dear friend.

"Oh I don't think he was there, I just wanted to point out that we didn't become true soul mates until during our ten years of bonding. And any true friendship needs time to grow ….. also I'm feeling kind of lazy to tell out entire ten-year long story together."

"Awwww, you should become a poet."

Blubs blushed. "Now you're making my cheeks rosy. I say we end this day with a nice and warm HOLY MOLEY! That transportation vehicle is parked at a handicapped zone!" Blubs pointed at the machine that was left a blue zone, a pogo stick.

"Let's book 'em."

"With me by your side." Durland held his hand out and Blubs grabbed. "Low let's go!"

And so the two cops leaped into action, but wait. Who's that coming into the scene? It's Mayor Tyler, looking out of breath from a quick run. "Aww shucks! I missed my chance to see what their actual relationship is." Tyler kicked the ground. "Sooner or later we are going to make a huge wrong assumption and everything will get awkward. Well better luck next time."

Mayor Tyler then noticed Manly Dan unleashing his rage at a clock again. "But as of right now. Get 'em! Get 'em!"

 **End of Chapter**

 **Tlriak'q fq yb crkkv fc Xibu grpq cixq lrq obsbxi fq'p x yoljxkzb, xka klqefkd jlob?**

* * *

 **Guess what time it is? Request seeking time!**

 **This time, I will set a one-week deadline. Which will be at May 24** **th** **, be careful with time zones.**

I will take one request from a single person and discuss with them about it.

I may reject an idea if it goes against any planned future chapters, does not fit well with Gravity Falls's canon, or just stupid. Do not ask for a reason if don't give one.

They must be a one-shot, no multi-parters or arcs. Though I may use it to directly connect to the next chapter.

Submit ideas through PM only and only one per person will be chosen for each requested chapter space. If your idea gets chosen, you will not be able to submit another idea again.

You MUST have an official account on here in order to ask for a request. But each requested story posted will be given credit, so free advertising for you!


	52. Seafood Melody

**No one gave me a request, so here's something from my mind instead.**

 **Chapter 52:** Seafood Melody

"Almost there aaaaaaaaand done." Abuelita stepped back from her grandson. "Soos, you look very handsome." Abuelita said as she looked at Soos in a nice sweater vest and khakis.

Mr. Mystery looked himself over in the mirror and straightens his bow tie. "I am so ready for this date."

Friday night had rolled around and during the week Soos asked Melody out for an official date, unlike their video chats they had through the remaining summer ever since their first date, which had a very surprising guest in the form of a vengeful and obsessive videogame character.

This night, Soos promised her that this will be a very normal night at Gravity Falls' Seafood restaurant called The Sunkin Food Joint; the only place in Gravity Falls that only serve seafood and nothing else. No really. Everything there is seafood. No fries, no vegetables, no fruits, and not even a single glass of water. But at least there are no animatronics.

"Now remember Soos, be a good boy out there." Abuelita patted Soos on his head. "And don't forget Commandment number seven! You hear me?"

Soos nervously nodded. "I wasn't even thinking of doing anything higher than rated G."

Abuelita smiled. "You're all grown up now, Soos." Soos started to feel bashful as his grandmother complimented her. "You have your dream job, your own house ….. technically the other Mr. Pines is still entitled to the deed. And you're taking a nice woman to a fancy restaurant. Now go and have a fun. Family appropriate fun!"

"You got it." Soos waved goodbye to his grandmother and walked out of the shack.

"I'll spy on him now."

(Much Later)

"Here we are, Melody. The Sunkin Food Joint!" Soos showed Melody the restaurant modeled after a sunkin ship. "Just for the record, that chest of doubloons is fake." Soos pointed at a fake chest for photo shots, where a fat kid in a red coat is pocking the plastic coins, thinking they're real.

The couple walked inside to see a nice dining area designed like the interior of an old ship, only with a high enough ceiling and no sign of any passengers with catchable diseases.

"Ooooh, look at the remains of some old captives." Melody smiled at three skeleton models chained to the wall.

"Argh, welcome aboard. Me matey." A pirate waiter came to them. "Let me walk you to your table."

Soos and Melody followed the pirate as they noticed some familiar faces such as Robbie with Tambry texting on their phones, Mr. and Mrs. Northwest who were looking overly fancy to keep up their rich appearance, Lazy Susan with her cats, Toby Determind with a cardboard cutout of Shandra Jimenez, Hand Witch complimenting a hiker's hand, The Gleeful family with Gideon struggling in a high chair, Blubs and Durland having a fish stick eating contest, The Woodpecker guy having a quiet argument with his woodpecker wife, and lastly Wendy on a date with a guy who was picking his eye.

"Say, she's hot." The boy said, pointing at Tambry.

Soos and Melody winced at a quick and violent scene followed soon after.

"One good guy! One, good minded guy! Is that too hard to ask for?!" Wendy shouted up into the heavens as she marches out of the building.

" _I'm lucking to find Soos_." Melody thought to herself as they sat next to a fish tank with an axolotl inside.

"Hey Melody, are you getting a weird vibe from this frilled salamander thing here?" Soos pointed at the axolotl which quickly hid from the couple.

Melody laughed softly. "Maybe it's some almighty high god among gods that speaks in rhymes."

Soos laughed with her. "And it like knows Bill and can easily kick his butt back to the triangle dimension. Or just turn him into a bird or stuck in someone's mind or something ….. boy we can come up with some crazy theories."

The two shared a laugh as they looked through their menus. They ordered a nice salmon dinner with no drinks since like I said they don't even serve a glass of water, so they probably don't want to risk drinking something called Urchin Soda or Red Snapper Tea.

With some calm music, the two talked briefly about the simple things like their family and the childhood they once had. Their conversation would turn to some unhappy topics like growing up and such, but they would quickly turn that around with some light hearted jokes and stories.

After a short laugh, the two became quiet as they enjoy the music together.

" _This is going so nicely._ " Melody thought as she glanced over to Soos who was snapping his fingers to the calm music. " _Why weren't we in high school together? At least I would have had a date to the prom who didn't try breaking dancing and end up breaking both his legs._ " Melody laughed at the small memory as she reflects on her short time in Gravity Falls. " _Everyone here seems real nice. I don't see a reason to ever leave this place_."

"Ahhhhh, the fish is revolting!"

"Nevermind." Melody, Soos, and the other guests turned to the kitchen door where a food tray burst from, being driven by a living salmon with a silver fork in his fin.

"Where is the one known as table number 10?" The salmon spoke in a very deep Russian accent. With a quick and intense glare he gave to a waiter who almost slipped away, he grabbed the waiter's suit with his little fins and pointed the fork to his neck. "Tell me where the humans are that wanted to feast on my flesh?"

The waiter nervously pointed to Soos and Melody. "There you are …." The salmon released the now nervous wreck of a waiter and moved the tray over to the dating couple. "Allow me to introduce myself." The salmon bowed. "I am Rasputin the Salmon." He stood right up with an emotionless look. "You're probably wondering why I am here?"

"Well I guess you're our dinner." Soos spoke in his normal tone. "But right now I'm trying to figure out how you stand on your tailfin? I mean there're no bones to support-"

"SILENCE!" Rasputin held his fork to Soos. "For years, my kind had fallen prey to your despicable species, and bears." The salmon chuckled. "But now it is time for the tables to turn."

"O.K." Soos stood up and literally turned the table 360 degrees. "Done."

Rasputin just stared at Soos with irritation. "Do you think this is some sort of game? This is a revolution! A revolution to all fish kind! No more shall we be served with disgusting lemons, or with the potato slices, or dare I say, tarter sauce."

"Hey Melody, this guy sounds like a bad guy in those Jimmy Blonds movies." Soos laughed.

All Melody wanted was a normal date for once, but unlike the crazy videogame character, this fish just looked plain silly. "All he needs is a cat to pet evilly." Melody joined in on the fun.

Rasputin the Salmon gasped. "How dare you suggest I be in companionship with the spawn of the devil?!" The salmon leaped onto the table and aimed his fork to Melody's neck. "No one moves, or I'll send this lassie to Davey Jones Locker."

"Hey, stay out of my locker!" shouted a normal man named Davey Jones.

Soos gasped as the not so threatening moment. "You stay away from my girlfriend you …. You SpongeBill TrapezoidPants character!"

Rasputin laughed. "I say, it is quite honorable to associate me with a God, unlike this she-monster right here!" Rasputin angrily pointed the fork at Melody, who could have easily snatched it right up.

"Oh no, help me Soos." Melody played along with the intense moment.

"Don't worry, I'll save you!" Soos shouted. "I demand a fork fight!"

Rasputin laughed. "You are an amateur. I on the other fin have mastered the art of Fork Fighting ever since I was baby escaping the meal of caviar. You cannot-"

"Hey, hey! Hold up!" McGucket came in, putting the situation to a pause. "Is this offensive to Russians … I can't hear nobody." McGucket cleaned his ears. "Hello, I'm talking to you ….. wait. Who am I talking to? ….. Eh, I guess it's O.K." McGucket walked away as the moment continues.

"Well if that's a no go, what is?" Soos asked, which caused Rasputin's cogs in his minds to spin.

"No go …. How about a deadly game of …. Go Fish." Rasputin narrowed his eyes dramatically at Soos.

"Hmmmmm. Sure, dude." Soos said with a dramatic zoom as an epic orchestrated tone played.

A waiter placed a set of playing cards on the table as all the guests gathered around to witness the greatest match ever told; a young adult playing a simple card game with a talking fish with a Russian voice.

With their tensions rising, each player took five cards. Rasputin looked through his cards and glanced at Soos squinting at his cards. "I'll go first." Rasputin stared at one of his cards. "Do you have any threes?"

"Go Fish, dude." Soos said as Rasputin drew a card.

Soos glanced at his cards. "Got any eights?"

Rasputin grunted furiously. "Why yes I do." Rasputin handed Soos an eight and Mr. Mystery placed the pair on the table.

Rasputin looked at his hand. "Do you have an ace?"

Soos gasped. "I do." Rasputin snickered at Soos handed over an ace.

Soos looked at his cards again. "Have some twos?"

"Go Fish." Rasputin calmly says as Soos drew a card.

"Have any sevens?" Rasputin asked.

"Ha, Go Fish!" Soos smiled as Rasputin drew a card, but quickly sweated in shock as Rasputin laughed.

"Just what I'd asked for." Rasputin placed a pair of sevens on the table.

"Oh boy." Soos stretched his collar for air. "Have any ….. sixes?"

Rasputin skimmed his cards. "Why I do believe that … you need to Go Fish."

The thrilling game of survival continues as the players took more pairs and drew cards from the pile until there was none left.

Now it was the match point. With the pairs of each evenly matched, they now only have three cards in their hands (and fins) with only their luck to guide them to victory.

"I must say, you are better than I'd expected." Rasputin said as he looked through his cards. "Now then, have any twelves?"

"Here you go." Soos handed him the twelve. "Got any fours?"

"Right here." Rasputin tossed Soos the four. "Now for the ….. wait a minute." Rasputin looked at the pairs and laughed. "Do you not see it? I have won this match!"

Soos looked around and gasped. "You're right! If I went first, I would probably have once this maybe? And I think we have an extra set of a number." Soos dropped his remaining card and his head landed on the table. "I am so sorry, Melody. This must be your worse date ever."

"Baaaah ha ha ha haaaaaa!" Rasputin held the fork behind him. "This is the fate of your villainous species." He turned around. "Now to slay this ….. where'd she go!?" Rasputin realized that Melody was no longer next to him. In fact, he became too distracted with the game to even keep an eye on her.

"I'm back." Melody walked back to the table. "Had to use the bathroom, so who won?"

Rasputin quickly aimed his fork to Melody. "I have defeated this man. Now you shall have your last breath."

"Wait a second." Soos tapped his chin. "How are you breathing in air?"

Rasputin became silent for ten seconds before he started flapping around like the fish he is. "Water! Water!"

Rasputin hopped right back into the kitchen and jumped into the sink filled with water. After catching his breath, Rasputin shouted at Soos with pure anger. "You may have outmatched me in a match against breathing air, but you shall suffer!" Rasputin the Salmon started laughing maniacally. "I and all our fish kind can sense it, Leviathan has returned, and his hatred for humans shall only grow! Baaaah ha ha ha ha haaaaa! Baaaaaaah ha ha ha ha haaaaa! Baaaa-"

Soos closed the kitchen door behind him and he, Melody, and everyone else sat down at their tables as if all of this didn't seem that important.

"Sorry this date turned out to be paranormal, Melody." Soos said sadly.

"Oh don't be, I had fun." Melody smiled which brighten Soos up. "And I didn't know you're such a skillful card player. You should teach me some skills."

Soos grinned. "Sweet, I can teach you which card you should ask first and I'll help you feel the beating hearts of the cards." Soos picked up one of the playing cards and placed it to his ear. "You'll probably get the hang of it better than me. Still don't hear a thing."

And so the two enjoyed their remaining night at The Sunkin Food Joint and were served a nice salmon dinner, which looked oddly familiar to them, and left the restaurant full and happy.

Soos drove Melody home in his pickup truck and parked right in front of her new house. "Soos, I don' t know how you do it, but you always have the most interesting dates any guy can give."

"Don't sweat it, though I am having some thoughts about that fish dude mentioning Leviathan." Soos felt his head. "I didn't think he can play God of Battle with those fins. Also-" Before Soos could say anything else, Melody kissed him on the lips.

"Good night, Soos."

"… Night!" Soos shouted with a red face as Melody walked into her house. "If we ever get married, I'm making Dipper my Best Man and Mabel the Bride of Honor … wait a minute. I want Stan to be Best Man … eh, I'll figure it out when it's time. Relationships use baby steps."

Soos drove away into the night, with Abuelita hiding in the back.

"Good night everyone."

 **End of Chapter**

 **Dexholwd zdv klglqj ehklqg Udvsxwlq wkh Ilvk wkh hqwluh wlph.**

 **Whelp, I just realized I accidentally made the codes of chapter 48-51 as 'Three Letters Back' instead of 'Three Letters Forward'. (As of 5/26/17) so I'll fix that eventually.**


	53. You Smart Teach Me

**I know I said the deadline for requests had passed, but since no one gave me anything, I decided to use** **Crimson Reiter** **'s idea.** **And after you read this, you will see that it goes against my 'One-Shots only' rules.**

 **Well I thought it over and decided to remove that altogether. But Keep in mind that I will be picky when it comes with mini-arcs.**

 **Also he revealed to me that 'TheMysteryofGF' revealed the Corduroy boys' names.**

 **Chapter 53:** You. Smart. Teach Me!

Inside the Corduroy house living room, Manly Dan was looking over Wendy's lasts test. "Hmmmmmm." He looked deeply curious into the homework. "Well it's a start."

"Is that one of Wendy's failed tests?" The eldest son asked as he walks in.

"Marcus, what did I told you about criticizing her grades?" Dan asked sternly to his son, Marcus, yes that's his name. The others are Kevin the middle boy and Gus the youngest.

"Oh, sorry dad." Marcus answered, standing up straight like a soldier being put in line.

"Don't forget you need to study hard, too." Dan said as he looked over a test marked C minus. "She's doing better, but still not good enough." Dan looked at a one of the questions.

"How'd she get this math question wrong? …. Oh wait, there's letters in there and a fancy drawing." Dan tried to think of the question and instead gotten furious. "Why ain't I smart?"

Usually Dan would go on a punching streak for whenever he gets this irritated, but when it comes to schoolwork, he uses all his self-control to calm himself in order to have a decent conversation with his kids, and sadly that's not always enough ….. about having the conversation be enough, he is in no way an abusive father.

"Wendy better find a smart guy to marry like I did … that sounded like it didn't come out right." He slammed his fist on the coffee table and broke it. "I'll fix it later." Dan looked at the clock that was going for ten. "The guy Wendy found looks nice enough. I have high hopes it goes decent."

Right on cue, Wendy burst the door open with a look of fury written on her freckled face and smears of leftover smoothies on her face. "He was checking out my best friend. I punched him. So no need to threaten his life." She marched to the broken table and looked at her test. "And I am in no mood to hear a lecture. I'm doing better so far." Wendy marched right into the kitchen for a glass of water and threw it on her face. "I'll be in my haven." With that, Wendy gave a heavy stomp on each step as she heads upstairs and slammed her bedroom door.

He was no stranger to how Wendy acted towards most of her dates. Just thinking about those idiotic boys tossing a perfectly good girl away caused Manly Dan to take out a rock and crushed it with his hand. After some heavy puffs, he thought over Wendy's mood throughout most of the summer and the early schoolyear.

"Hey Marcus, I know how stressed Wendy can get about school and dates, but do you ever noticed that she looks stressed on normal days here at home too?"

Marcus shrugged with a 'I dunno'.

Dan growled angrily. "Just a few days ago she was giving you boys that old teenage mood when you guys waked her up at 6 a.m., but why is she acting like this more often?" Dan removed his hat and scratched his head with his huge index finger. "Unless I'm an idiot and I over looked that she's stressed all the time." Dan closed his eyes. " _She would have known how to talk to Wendy_." Dan held in his stress and pinched between his eyes as he thinks. " _And Wendy's turning 16 in a couple of weeks, so I'll have to teach her how to drive and …. Oh …..._ " Dan leaned on the couch and breathed calmly.

"…..Sooooooo….." Marcus asked, expecting an answer.

"Grab your brothers and go beat the stuffing out of that boy."

"Yes!"

Inside Wendy's room, our favorite redhead of Gravity Falls was snuggling in her bed. "Bed, why can't life be easy?" She turned to her pillow and gave it a kiss. "I literally want to marry you, that's how messed up my mind is right now."

She turned over and grabbed one of her stuffed animals. "Growing up is hard, isn't it?" Wendy shook the stuffed animal to make it looks like a nod in agreement. "I don't blame Mabel at all for wanting to stay in that bubble. Heck, I got soaked in to all that annoying child stuff. Thank God Dipper's smarter than that."

She shook her stuffed animal and gave it a voice. "Miss Corduroy. You know it's against the Law of High School to mention God. Our superior laws that govern humanity also forbid owning a cellphone, wearing the wrong clothing, bringing in safety scissors, being slightly distracted, having a snack, clapping during lunch, mention something political or world related that the teacher disagree with, or being late because of our ridiculously small entrance."

She held up stuffed animal up to block the light. "Yet go all out with embarrassing your fellow students, cat calling all the gals, manipulating boys because you have a cute face, cyber bully people, smoking on school grounds, and let's not forget to pretend that you're special and you will never fail in life."

Wendy sat up and threw the stuffed animal at the wall. "Because being an adult is the best thing in the world. Just as long as you have a good spouse and have good grades for a good college that wants to charge you super extra bucks for classes and books you barely need."

She sighed while lying back down. "And the best part is that I'm just getting started. Wendy, super cool girl is going to be 16 in about two weeks; which means I will have to follow more rules about road safety and will probably hit a fire hydrant, then dad will yell at me and I have to pay."

She turned to her night stand and noticed a photo of her as a little kid pretending to drive in an actual car. "And I wish that was my biggest pain." She lay their quietly for a moment before checking her phone.

Tambry and Robbie are still out.

Nate and Lee are working on a project.

Thompson is spending time with family.

And that's just about it for her small circle of friends. Soos and Melody are probably sleeping in so they'll set up for Halloween this month. Which of course Wendy will love to do, but right now she's not looking forward to that.

"Just need someone to talk to right now." Wendy put her phone away as she scratches the back of her neck. "To bad the twins don't have phones. Seriously, their parents need to get to it." She sat up and threw her arms up. "They should have had phones before their folks sent them up here in the first place. Like if Mabel needs a ride home from a friend's house or what if some jerk pushed Dipper into his own locker and there's no one around to get him out." She looked at her laptop. "The only way I can talk to them is with this … hmmmm." Wendy reached for her laptop and opened it up. "I wonder if I can get them."

Wendy checked and found Mabel doing a live chat with her friends, and it looks like they were logging off. "Just in time."

* * *

"By Candy and Grenda! And I'll tell you if anything else happens." The eager Mabel waved to her two best friends as they logged off. "Hey Dipper, I'm done." Before she logged off, Mabel noticed that Wendy wants to chat. "Never mind, Wendy wants to talk!"

Dipper was lounging in his bed when Mabel called out. "Oh, really?" Dipper looked very happy as he hopped off and dashed to his sister.

Mabel opened the window and saw Wendy waving. "Hi Wendy. How's it hanging ….. wait a minute." Mabel looked real close at Wendy's face, making the redhead look nervous. "That's a stressed out and tired face. Did something happen?"

Wendy was caught off guard by Mabel sudden correct statement, especially when she's good at hiding her own stress. But she should have expected that from the girl who can tell when a duck wants its bread whole wheat.

"Hey, Wendy. You feeling alright?" Dipper popped right next to his sister, looking concern.

"Nothing too big." Wendy calmed the two, without going into a lot of details. "School and dates, the norm. But I did just punch a jerk of a date right in the face for checking Tambry out."

"Oh I hoped you punched him back to Monday!" Mabel said. "Because Mondays are stupid when there's school."

"Mabel, you and I speak the same language …. Sometimes." The lumberjack girl was feeling better already. She looked toward Dipper for some of his funny comebacks. "Also high school's been super bummer."

With the mention of High School, Mabel covered her ears in a panic. "I promised myself I won't think about that till after Christmas."

Dipper sat down on the chair as Mabel stepped away to block any high school related topics with pillows.

"Sorry about Mabel." Dipper rubbed the back of his head.

"Don't sweat it. I was the one that got her worried in the first place." Wendy felt a bit of guilt from when she told Mabel about being a teenager, but knew that Mabel still had to learn sooner or later. "But right now I'm passing my tests."

"That's great." Dipper said with a smile, but notice Wendy looking a bit worried.

"It is, but it's still rough. I barely pass them. It's like I'm walking on a tight rope in a circus run by evil clowns."

"Sorry to hear that." Dipper thought of some things to cheer her up. "Did you try tutors?"

"Yes, and they all didn't help or stuck around long enough." Wendy said with a not so steady look. Dipper even noticed a slight twitch to Wendy's hand. "All the adult tutors are so dull that they make Toby look fun, well pre-Weirdmageddon Toby." Wendy laughed at a memory of Toby talking about extreme sports. "Then there were the girls my age, they weren't that much fun at all. And don't get me started on all the geek boys drooling over me." Wendy shook off the thoughts of a geek making the most painful pickup lines known to man. "And my dad ….. he's not stupid. But he wasn't the best in school either."

Wendy sighed as she felt her head. "I mean I know he wants me to do better than he did, but … it's just not easy for me, man. I'm nowhere near as smart as you."

Dipper blushed from his crush's compliment. "Well I'm not that smart like a walking calculator."

Wendy's eyes widened. "Did I just hear that coming from your mouth?" Wendy smiled as she stare directly at Dipper. "You figured out that your sister was dating a weirdo bundle, you stopped two ghosts from keeping us teens trap in a haunted store, you defeated Gideon who had that ridiculous robot version of himself, and you figured out the Shapeshifter's …. shapeshifting trick and 'iced' him." Wendy laughed. "And let's not forget the one who dragged us to the Blind Eye and help fixed McGucket's heads, which got you that awesome Mind Erasing Gun which did a little thing for us."

Wendy tapped her chin. "Now what was it …. Oh yeah. Erased Bill Cipher!"

Dipper's grin-covered face turned completely red as he mumbles random words. "I mean I'm not so so Dipper. I mean, smart is smart. Heh, I mean eeeeh."

Seeing Dipper's bashful mood was too much for her as she laughed uncontrollably, which made Dipper laughed alongside her.

"O.K., you guys are done with High School talk." Mabel joined in as she laughs along with whatever, but then a random book fell off of Dipper's bookshelf as if it was thrown off. "How'd you get on the ground, little guy." Mabel walked over to where the book fell. "Ooooh, a bit chilly." Mabel scrunched up her sweater and picked up the book. "Want to join in on the fun Mr. …. Alright Algebra?" Mabel turned to Dipper. "Dipper! There is no such thing as Algebra being alright!"

"Alright Algebra?" Wendy started to laugh again. "Man, Dipper. You're such a nerd!" Wendy eyes' opened a bit and saw Dipper's looking shocked. "No offense, man!" Wendy waved her hands. "I just mean your super smart. I bet a lot of kids go to you for ….."

Inside Wendy's mind, a memory of a dream came to her of one where she and Dipper watched a movie and shortly after she suggested something to Dipper.

"For tutoring!" Wendy jumped up and gave a huge grin to the startled Dipper. "You. Smart. Teach Me!"

"T-Teach you?" Dipper nervously asked as both concern and pride mixed with his mind. "I mean I am pretty smart, and I did look up on some High School subjects. And I do know chemistry far better than the other kids, and-"

"You're hired!" Wendy shouted, spooking Dipper. "During summer, you came along and made nothing boring. Now you can do the same to the evil curse upon the land of …. Math with letters." Wendy rubbed her head. "I mean letters should be in book, not math problems."

"Who gets me? This girl gets me!" Mabel cheered.

With his face still red, Dipper thought about it and saw no problem with it. "Alright, I'll try."

"Woot Woot!" Wendy threw her arms up. "Tomorrow after lunch. You're translating math to English."

"You got it." Dipper smiled proudly.

"It's a date then." Wendy randomly stated; which Dipper was not expected to hear.

"I uhhhh."

"Naw uh, sorry sister." Mabel got into Wendy's view. "This boy already has a date tomorrow."

Wendy's eyes widened as Dipper continued to blush. "Dipper Pines strikes again!" Wendy cheered for her buddy. "Who's the lucky lady?"

Dipper's anxiety started acting up again. "Well it all started at the dance earlier and-"

"He has a date with the ghost that tried to kill us!" Mabel happily answered Wendy.

"…..I'm sorry, whatcha say?"

 **End of Chapter**

 **Afmmbo tfii yb x dobxq qrqlo clo ebo, yrq peb tfii kbsbo zlkpfabo efj xp x obmixzbjbkq clo ebo sbov cfopq lkb.**

* * *

Crimson Reiter's idea are continues chapters of Dipper tutoring Wendy on different subjects and topics. I've created this chapter on my own for the introduction. So they'll be just like 'Emails and Live Chats' and 'Storytime with Soos'

Just to add this in, I've mentioned I want requests to be sent personally to me on my account, that way I can discuss it with people who actually have accounts. I can't have discussions with guests.

 **Over 70,000 views!**


	54. The Dancing Dead

**Chapter 54:** The Dancing Dead

I don't regret making that title.

"So let me get this straight." Wendy calmly said to Dipper through the video chat. "Ghost girl tried to kill you and later on after hearing her sad backstory, which is depressing and I would love to punch those bullies in their faces and laugh, you invited her to live with you?"

"Yep." Dipper nodded. "That's a very short and simple explanation of the long experience we had. So no need to go over everything.

"And now you just had a dance with her and will be going study tomorrow." Wendy shook her head. "I'm happy you're getting over me … but a ghost? No offence to Kimmy, but a ghost?" Wendy felt baffled by this. After their talk after the bunker, after all those girls Dipper flirted with because of his con artist great uncle, the next honest to god girl Dipper wanted to know better as a possible official girlfriend, is dead and still moving.

Dipper scratched his head with embarrassment. "I'll just tell you how my night went."

* * *

Eggbert Middle School is throwing their monthly dance over at the cafeteria. All the kids dressed their best to show off their dance moves to appropriate music the school chose, which wasn't an easy picking.

"School dances." Mabel walked into the cafeteria in her party outfit she wore during the Mystery Shack's dance. "Who's ready to rock?!" Mabel received plenty of cheers from her fellow peers.

Following in came Dyami, Beethoven, and for the first time ever at a school dance, Dipper.

"Oh boy, I love the dance!" Beethoven said, but quickly went to his 'bad boy' self. "I mean dances are for girly chumps …. But not you!"

Dyami looked very impressed. "I've been looking forward to this all month." Dyami turned to Mabel. "I sometime got a bit crazy when I dance. Especially when songs like-"

"Wait!" Mabel halted Dyami for a bit and took out a notepad. "Go on."

Dipper laughed softly as he turned to the door. "You still coming?"

Kimmy nervously walked in with a slow pace. "I … I never danced before." She showed off her outfit. "I'm still in the clothes I wore when I … you know. Seriously, this doesn't make sense." Kimmy examined her ghostly sleeve. "I've asked this before, but is it like part of my ghost skin or something?"

Dipper shrugged his arms as he looked just as confused as her.

"I got nothing, but I'll show you how to dance."

"Of course she'll learn how to dance with you." Mabel said with her eyebrows jumping up and down.

"Mabeeeeel. What are you planning?" Dipper didn't need to have that twin telepathy thing to know that Mabel is planning something.

"Me, planning?" Mabel gave her brother a forced laugh which she had no intent on hiding. "I'm just here to enjoy this wonderfully dance. And the fact that I'm forcing you two on a date now."

"What?!" Both Dipper and Kimmy shouted.

"No refunds!" Mabel grabbed both their hands and threw them towards the dance floor. "DJ guy, hit it!"

The DJ played a generic song with no lyrics for the kids to dance to.

The two stood there awkwardly on their surprise date set up by Mabel the Match Maker.

"So …" Dipper looked away confused as Kimmy rubbed her arm. "I doubt that Mabel will let any of us leave. Soooooo?"

"Just teach me already." With a red face, Kimmy offered her hand.

"Oh, well it's not ballroom fancy like that." Dipper glanced at Mabel waving. "But I bet that's coming up soon."

Dipper took a deep breath and smiled. "Just repeat after me."

* * *

"Awwwww. Little Dippy's being a gentlemen." Wendy teased Dipper.

The boy blushed, but couldn't get irritated by the coolest person on the planet.

* * *

Kimmy watched Dipper dancing to the music just like all the other kids are doing. She was quite amused that Dipper's dance moves weren't really that dorky, but what did she know? She'd never danced.

With a nervous smile, Kimmy started to move her body to the song and wave her arms. At first she felt completely embarrassed, thinking that everyone will just point at her and laugh. She glanced around the cafeteria and noticed no one looking at her. Heck, there was one kid doing the worm and another in a loin cloth releasing a box of small animals.

With relief, she relaxed and danced with Dipper, but when more time passed, her excitement starts to build and her dancing moves faster and faster.

Dipper glanced at Kimmy dancing all out. It really warmed his heart to see the girl who'd gone through bullying and death years ago to finally enjoy the happy things in life, and he nervously chuckled with a red face just how her black hair reflex the light and her purple eyes will sometimes gaze at him for a short time. Which of course caused him to lose focus and fall over into some chairs.

Kimmy chuckled at Dipper's not so prideful state and offered a hand.

When the two's hands made contact, Mabel immediately threw a rock at the DJ with a note reading 'Romantic music, NOW! You see those three exclamation marks? That means move it, buster!'

As soon as Kimmy pulled Dipper up and they locked eyes, the DJ put on a generic love song and a random spot light lit up above them.

"All according to plan." Mabel patted herself on the back.

* * *

"Mabel you're kind of scaring me." Wendy said to Mabel.

"O.K."

* * *

Dyami chuckled at the sight of Dipper and Kimmy standing there awkwardly with nothing by their wide eyes staring directly at each other.

"I have to say, you're plan is working like a charm." Dyami smile then disappeared. "Buuuuuut why a ghost? More importantly, why her after our little struggle back that the orphanage of the damned? You know, where we would have been just like her? Because of her!?" The quick twitch in his eye shows that he, even though he's now O.K. with Kimmy, had a few issues to work out.

"You see my fair gent." Mabel spoke in a stereotypic polite man tone. "Girls already trademarked vampire and werewolf romances." Mabel smiled. "Now boys can have ghosts and …. Zombies!"

"That's not a good thought." Dyami gave one huge step away from Mabel. "Does liking a ghost also counts as …. I do not want to think about that."

Beethoven noticed the huge gap between Mabel and Dyami and realized the opportunity. "Alright, here is my chance." Beethoven took a deep breath and marched forward. "Mabel."

"Hm?" Mabel turned around and looked at Beethoven with that cute and curious look he always loved. He can recall all the times he froze up from looking at that face, like right now.

"Helloooooo, Beethoven?" Mabel snapped her fingers at the motionless boy.

* * *

"So he just stood there like a statue, and I have absolutely no idea why." Mabel filled in, which Wendy was surprised to hear.

"Do you really not see what was going on?" Wendy asked the one person in the world who should obviously see what's up, but only received a shrug from the Match Maker, and Dipper gesturing to just go with it.

* * *

As everyone grabbed a dance partner (minus the really creepy boy trying to grab the hand of a rich snot and received a painful slap. Don't bother feeling sorry for him, he was a r _eal_ freak) and slowly danced arm and arm, except for the tomato faced surprise daters who were just as motionless as Beethoven.

"Ahem." Mabel slowly moved close to catch Dipper's attention.

"Oh, uhhhhh." Dipper looked away as Kimmy shut her eyes close. "I guess we started get should? I mean should get started." Dipper let out a nervous laugh as Kimmy nodded her head in agreement.

Dipper took the lead as Kimmy tries her best to avoid any more eye contact.

* * *

"Fff-AAAAH ha ha ha!" Wendy had to set her laptop to the side so she wouldn't knock it over from her laughs. "Oh man, what happened to all that confident you got from that road trip?"

Dipper stared at Wendy with a red frowned face.

* * *

" _What happened to all that confident I got from that road trip_?!" Dipper anxiously thought to himself as his hearts races when Kimmy slowly looked at him.

"I-I'm having fun."

Dipper noticed the nervous look in her purple eyes, which made him felt more at ease with himself, until she stumbles on her feet and tipped over on Dipper. Queue the 'boy catching girl in the nick of time and look into their eyes' cliché.

* * *

"And then the clock stroke midnight and she had to leave before the spell with a curfew ran out." Wendy held her hands and flashed her eyelashes at Dipper. "But she left her glass slipper behind that could have easily shattered and mess up her foot big time. Now Prince Dipper needs to find the exact shoe size because he has no idea what a face is." Wendy gave another laugh. "Say, can Cinderella sue the fairy if those slippers do break? And why didn't that missing slipper disappear too?"

Dipper looked away in embarrassment as Mabel spoke up.

"Just like in all those romance movies." Mabel softly sighs as Wendy mentally thanked herself she never saw one in her life. "And just like in those movies, the evil villain shows up just to take away the hero's true love."

* * *

"Did you just see that, Dyami?!" Mabel gleed at another awkward moment between the boy and the ghost. "Nothing is going to ruin it!"

"Hey Mabel."

Mabel gasped loudly as the DJ turned on some dramatic music. "No …. It can't be!"

But it was, Jessica Jones, looking quite snazzy in her fancy clothing.

Jessica glanced over to the two nervous wreck of a couple. "Is that Dipper and Kimmy dancing?"

"Beethoven, get a potato sack." Mabel told Beethoven, and he agrees and dash off. "Now Jess, I need you to stand perfectly still and-"

"Cool." Jessica smile, which was a huge relief for Mabel. "Hey Dyami, you want to dance?"

"Distraction!" Mabel pulled Jessica to a nearby janitor closet. "Dance, Dyami! Dance!"

"Wait, what just-" Dyami had no say as Mabel pulled him to the dance floor.

"I got the potato sack, Mabel!" Beethoven carried the sack in his arms, which was still filled with potatoes. "So you're hungry? I can make you mashed potatoes." Beethoven looked at the dance floor and gasped in shock, the love of his life swirling around Dyami in the air as the young native yelled in fear. "I …. I lost."

A blue light covered the depressed boy as he walked into the moonlight. With a deep sigh, he sat on a bench and gazed upon the starry night sky. "I was O.K. with the boys who would walk towards you existence currently and repeat." The once failed bully sang in a calm and depressed voice. "I was O.K. because I acknowledged that they didn't really fit until you."

A star raced across the sky.

"I was O.K. when you came and we rumbled like it was all some funny game. Over her, who she'd pick. After all those planet cycles I never guessed I'd lose."

The heavy hearted boy stood up on the bench and expressed his feeling into the heavens.

"Game over, isn't it? Isn't it? Isn't it over? Game over, isn't it? Isn't it? Isn't it over? You achieved and she picked you and she like liked you and she's not here. It's over, isn't it? Why can't I get over it?"

Beethoven pretended to swordfight, but fell over face first on the ground. He slowly stood up and continued singing.

"Battle and fame, spit shine, glue, summer vacation, her notice. Out in the sun rays my potential bald, exact, science fair."

Beethoven jumped on a street light pole and swung around. "Where am I now in this dimension without she? Sad and also sad with the urge to think lowly of her. What does it physical matter? It's already complete. Now I've got to be there for her pig."

"Squee?" Waddles looked at Beethoven, and then walks away.

"Game over, isn't it? Isn't it? Isn't it over? It's over isn't it? Isn't it? Isn't it over? You achieve and she picked you and she like liked you and she's not here."

"He looked at the moon and a single teardrop ran down his cheek.

"Game over, isn't it? Why can't I get over it? Game over, isn't it? Why can't I get over it?"

Beethoven dropped a rose and walked down the lonely street.

* * *

"I mean he literally sang all that and we all heard it." Dipper said to Wendy while Mabel was in the background. "The only ones who didn't hear were Mabel who was too overjoyed in her dance and Dyami who hit his head too hard because Mabel's grip slipped."

"Dyami looked so cute being carried away to the nurse office." Mabel hugged herself.

Wendy glanced at Mabel. "Soooooo ….."

"Dyami's fine and Beethoven got some ice cream."

* * *

"Well that was something." One kid said from the group that listened to Beethoven. "He should join chorus." They wall walked back into the school, all except for Dipper and Kimmy.

"I'm pretty sure she'll get over Dyami and jump straight to him soon." Dipper said, but noticed the ghost girl looking up at the moon.

" _Looks so peaceful up there_." Kimmy felt peace looking at the glowing orb in the night sky. " _No noise or actions, just the view of this world and beyond_." She leaned on a stone wall as Dipper joined her.

* * *

"And here comes another cutie moment where you talk about emotions and hug and kiss each other." Wendy wrapped herself in his arms and made a kissy face, embarrassing Dipper yet again.

* * *

Dipper stood their quietly as he watches the moon also, the perfectly round rock hovering around the planet that is in no way a 2D disk hiding alien surveillance. "So …. How is it?"

"Hm?" Kimmy glanced at Dipper with a small smile. "How's what?"

"This week." Dipper smiled. "After we showed you what happened around the world and introduced you to your new addiction, you're more openly happy around us. Buuuuuuut you seriously need to lay off on the games."

Kimmy laughed. "Can you blame me? They're fun!" Kimmy closed her eyes and looked away joyfully. "And I really want to try that Kingdom Brains game. I bet it has a fun story."

"Well the story is a lot of things." Dipper scratched his head. "But do you sometimes feel … uncomfortable with things? Anything bothering you right now?"

Kimmy's grin turned back to a soft smile. "Nothing right now; and I haven't even thought back about my past since." She looked at Dipper with her deep purple eyes. "I'm so glad I met you."

Before Dipper could react, Kimmy gave him a tight hug.

Dipper heart raced as her cheek pressed up against his. With easy breaths, he wrapped his arm around Kimmy and hugged her back.

" _Maybe Mabel made the right choice_."

The two embraced each other under the night sky, with nothing but their company and the warm hug they shared.

It was all peaceful, until a certain song played.

'Disco girl. Coming through. That girl is you. OOH OOOH, OOH OOOH!'

And then all the kids rushed out of the building, covering their ears. "Non-current music! It burns!"

With disappointment that their hug lasted only so long, the two walked into the building as Kimmy listened to the music. "What were they running from? This song's great!"

Dipper grinned widely towards the joyful spirit. "I love this song, come on!" Dipper grabbed her hand and pulled her to the dance floor, where the two danced the night out together.

"Match made!" Mabel stood next to the DJ and they hi fived each other. "Now where did my date go?"

Meanwhile, in the nurse's office, Dyami was resting his head and mind on the bed, until he heard the slight beat of Disco Girl.

"N-Noooo….. not that, please."

* * *

"The end!" Mabel shouted, pushing Dipper to the side. "And now I 'accidently' told Kimmy about all the new ice cream flavors they have and that she and my bro bro here should try 'em all!" Mabel pulled Dipper back up and rubbed his head. "You can thank me later, I'm out of here!" Mabel cartwheeled herself out of Dipper's room.

"You know you really do need to thank her." Wendy smiled at Dipper. "Cute and likes the stuff you like, she's a keeper." Wendy gave Dipper two thumbs up as Dipper rubbed the back of his head.

"I know …. and can I tell you something, just between us?" Wendy nodded yes as Dipper closed the door quietly and walked back to his computer.

"Please don't mention this to Mabel or anyone else, ….. I really really like Kimmy!" Wendy was surprised by Dipper's sudden reveal that she even guessed that Mabel would just burst into that door with a marching band behind her. "I don't know if this is rushing it, but I think I want to ask her to be my girlfriend!"

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEH!" That girlish scream did not come from our lumberjack gal, nor was it from Mabel Pines, not even Dipper Pines himself. Instead, appearing right above Dipper, was Kimmy the ghost. "Yes! Yes! Yes! Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaoooooooooooohhhhh uhhhhhhhh." Kimmy sudden burst of excitement was shot down upon realizing she revealed herself to the boy she likes and his old crush. "Uuuuuuuuh." Then she phased though the wall and flew away from the building.

"….. How in the heck did I forget she lives here now, and right when I said that?!" Dipper sunk back into his desk chair as the last moment slowly sinks into Dipper's memory.

"I'm sorry Dipper." Wendy gave him a petty smile. "But that was too funny!" Wendy laughed once more at Dipper's embarrassment. "I seriously needed that, Dipper." Wendy sat her laptop to the side again as he let out her raging giggles.

"Rrrrrrrr." Dipper covered his face from the upmost embarrassment. "Well at least I know she'll say yes now."

After a long laugh, Wendy caught her breath after her thighs started to hurt. "Congrats, Dipper! You got yourself a girlfriend!"

Dipper took a deep breath as he removed his hands. "Yeah …. I guess I do!" Dipper started to laugh at himself as he gets too bashful to even keep a straight face. "I mean how come no one asked her out yet? She's cute and funny and you should see her when we played Super Bash Sisters. She destroyed me as Jigglepuff. Jigglepuff! And don't get me started on all the pranks we played on Mr. Barney with Kimmy's ghost powers!"

Wendy cheerfully laughed at her buddy, the one who had that young crush on her, moving on and finding a girl of his own.

"And make sure you treat her with respect, mister." Wendy playfully waved her finger at Dipper who couldn't even look at her. "She's a fine and smart lady. So make sure you hold the door open to the girl who can walk right through a brick wall, cover your perfectly good jacket on a puddle that she can just float over, and take her out to dinner where she probably can't eat since she's been dead for 40 years ….. heh, 40 years…. The big four zero….." Those words repeated themselves in the redhead's mind. After thinking long about it, she realized something huge. "Oh no." Wendy looked at her friend who still hasn't gotten control of himself. "Ooooh no. Oooooh no."

Dipper glanced at Wendy and his happy mood died. "W-Wendy?"

"Duuuuude." Wendy closed her eyes as she held her head. "I'm sorry. But …. But …."

"Please don't tell me _you_ suddenly have a crush on me even with the age thing." Dipper said with a stern voice with no sign of being reasoned with.

"Woah, not that." Wendy clearly informed him. "But the last thing is sort of it." Wendy ruffled her hair in frustration. "She's a ghost."

"Clearly." Dipper said, not too sure what she means by that.

"And well she was dead for a long time." Wendy took a deep breath. "And stayed the same age."

"Yes, she is the same age." Dipper rubbed his head, not catching onto what Wendy means.

"She's been the same age for 40 years." Wendy said very clearly. "And you're still alive, still aging."

"Still aging …. I …. I ….." Dipper's eyes slowly widened. "I ….. Oh ….. Oh no."

 **End of Chapter**

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* * *

Question Time!

When or if you leave a review, please tell me your favorite and your least favorite chapter.


	55. Wasn't Meant to Be

**Thank '** gamelover41592' **for pointing out that mistake.**

 **Chapter 55:** Wasn't Meant to Be

Unlike what most fairytales say, there is no such thing as true love. There are only multiple people that match with you very well and you match with them. There are good ones, there are decent ones, and there are even great ones.

Love doesn't just form from first sight, instead it grows through bond.

However as much as that bond had grown, destruction can take mere seconds. That is the tale of these two loves. One feels that they must let go while the other is unaware of what's to come.

In a room, we will see the end of a romance that started from tragedy and forgiveness.

"Look, I know you really love me." A long sigh was heard. "It's just that …. Well ….. you know that life is up and down, right?"

"…."

"I know you're silent, confused at most." Another sigh was heard. "And ever since this started between us, it's been …. Well going downhill."

"…."

"It's shocking to hear this, I know. But you know that we were once happy? The sun shining on our present, the wind blowing away the past, and the fun that holds the vision of our future."

"…."

"But like I said before, I, no, we became different."

"…"

"Well, do you have words to speak?"

"….."

"You must have something to say?"

"…"

"Speak, gosh darn it! I know you want to shout at me! Insult me! Wished you never met me!"

"….."

"That's it, I can't take it anymore!" The voice shouted harsher. "We are getting a divorce, Woodpecker!"

The Woodpecker guy shouted at the top of his lungs at his Woodpecker wife, who was just pecking at the kitchen table.

"What's the matter? We can't get a divorce just like that? Well I'll just have the swan Gideon owns to help _me_ out on that one!"

"…."

"Giving me the cold shoulder, are you? Well then I'm just going to wait out the winter, OUT THERE!" And with that, the Woodpecker Guy marched right out of the house and slammed the door. "How could she say nothing like that? It's as if her species is not as intelligent as the human race!"

The Woodpecker guy kept that sour mug as he marches down the streets at night, giving glares at anyone he passes. "Who needs love, anyway?"

* * *

"W-Wha? Who said that!?" Love God awoke from his van overlooking an ocean and a swing set. "Hello ….. anyone …. New Jersey is weird."

* * *

The Woodpecker guy kicks an empty can. "I can show her. I don't need that wretched birdbrain in my life!"

 **20 minutes later**

"I doooooooooo need h-h-her! Waaaaaaaaaah!" Broken down, The Woodpecker Guy drowns his sorrows in smoothies at the local ice cream parlor. "I…..I thought it would all worked out. What is wrong with me?!"

"Welcome to the Club." Wendy sat next to him, looking just as down.

The Woodpecker guy took another gulp from his smoothie as two sets of footprints were heard coming from behind. "Oh you're asking that now, huh?"

The Woodpecker Guy slowly looked with an emotionless stare to see the two cops of Gravity Falls, Blubs and Durland.

"You're the one who violated the code of marriage to marry a …. Ewww, I can't even say it." Durland shivered.

"You married someone of a different species." Blubs waved his fingers at him. "Do you have any idea what that would cause?"

"A mix of human bird babies that will take over the world!" shouted Durland. "Just imagen it. Them feather covered people flying around droppin' their droppin' on all the cars, missing the trash cans, chirping at each other, buying stocks, eating birdseed, waiting in line at the DMV, flying into clear-glass windows, and watching T.V. It would be a nightmare!"

"And then they'll use a ray gun to turn us all into worms." Blubs slammed his hand on the table which caught the Woodpecker's guy attention. "You made the right choice. Now go out there and … do something other than being married to an animal."

The two cops left the man to dwindle in sadness alone.

"Errrrr, what were they saying?" The Woodpecker Guy just lazily looked at another cup of smoothies and gulped it down. "M-Maybe I do need to move on …. I'll ask that sweater girl for advice… no wait, she went home after the summer." The Woodpecker Guy then realized that one of her friends is sitting right next to him. "Child, can you-" Then he noticed Wendy walking out the door, with a look saying 'leave me alone or I'll maul you.'

With another sigh, he slops on the counter. "Am I just wasting time here? Shouldn't there be something more important going on that people want to see over this sad state of mine? I … I just don't want to think about this, but this is my problem. I have to address it somehow."

He stood up from his seat and wiped the bits of smoothie from his face. "I'll ….. I'll find a better wife than her! I'll show you, Woodpecker Wife!" He walked out of the ice cream paler and pondered to himself. "Now what other kind of marriages were legal during the pioneer days …. Pioneer Day already passed."

He sat down on the curb and hugged his legs close. "I'll never find love again! I am horrible, this is my fault!" He cried up into the heavens. "I should have agreed to fly south in the winter. It gets cold around here! And there are tropical beaches down there! I would have had some fancy pineapple juice and sing and dance and watch the beautiful sunset together at the calm beach! What is wrong with me!?"

As the man drowned himself in his own sorrows, a lantern of hope appeared above his head.

"Could it be?"

He looked up and was amazed that at his weakest state, his beloved Woodpecker wife came to him.

"What's that, you're sorry?"

"…."

"No, I'm sorry! I was selfish!"

"…"

"Well …. Maybe we were both selfish! Selfish and stupid!"

Woodpecker guy held his wife in his hand. "I promise on this day forth, I will always be by your side, just like our wedding vows!"

"…."

"I love you too!"

And so the two walked down the newly lite road towards their bright future together, but within the shadows, two beings glared at the sight they find horrific.

"Curses! They're back together!" Blubs shouted as Durland looked at his phone. "Durland, I pray that this is a onetime thing. Otherwise we have to prepare humanity for the human animal hybrid takeover."

Durland gasped.

"I know that sounds horrifying, but we'll be ready for them!"

Durland shook his head. "That's not why I gasped. Look at this here episode of the Quiet House!" Durland held his phone to Blubs. "Looks like the Country Player Eclipse is in love with a bag of mulch."

"WHAT!?" Blubs swapped the phone and watched a video of some country looking girl hugging a bag of mulch in a romantic way. "Noooo …. Not my favorite Quiet! Nooooo…." Blubs dropped to his knees. "You were supposed to be with Sick M-wagger. Waaaaah ha ha haaaaa!"

Durland patted his best buddy on the back. "There there! It won't be that bad."

Blubs wiped away a tire from his eye. "I… I guess you're right. It's just a cartoon and-"

"OH NO!" Durland suddenly shouted. "I forgot that even more computer reaction clips thingys that are gonna pop up now!"

The two cops held onto each other as they scream in sorrow for the true evil that shall grow even stronger in this world. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

 **End of Chapter**

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	56. Deadly Date, Without the Death

**Chapter 56** : Deadly Date, Without the Death

Dipper's alarm awoke him on a Saturday morning, the day of his date with a spirit. The boy rubbed his eyes and turned the alarm off.

"I hope I'm ready for this." He grumbly said to himself, without the joy he had before Wendy pointed out that one flaw with his day with Kimmy.

"Of course you are!"

"AAAAAH!" Dipper rolled out of bed in shock to see Mabel popping up right beside him.

"Mabel, how long were you …. Never mind." Dipper stood up and rubbed his head. "You need to listen to me. I-" Mabel interrupted him with a huge hug. "I'm making you a special breakfast for the lover boy!"

"M-Mabel." Mabel dropped her brother and bolted out of his room, leaving her brother annoyed. "This is going to be a loooooonnnnnnnng day." Dipper glanced round his room and gathered his clothes for the day, but for the special occasion he decide to go with a nice looking dress jacket and some jeans, mostly because Mabel would keep him locked in if he went with his usual dress code.

After a warm shower, he got changed and walked down the steps. "I hope Kimmy can handle this." Thinking about his talk with Wendy, he walked passed Waddles and Snake Eyes and entered the kitchen. And just to add to his dumb luck, there stood both his parents looking down at their little man, wearing huge grins.

"I thought I told Mabel to keep this down." Dipper mumbled to himself as his Mother kneeled down to him.

"Well, Dipper. You look fancy today. Is it for a special thing you didn't' tell us?"

Throughout his young life, Dipper acquitted traits from his father like his intelligence and his taste for mystery. Same thing can be said to his mother with Mabel, and some of her traits rubbed off on his father as well.

"Mom, Dad. This isn't a big deal as-" He was cut off again, but his mother's own grasp this time.

"My baby boy is going on his first date!"

Dipper tried to hold his dignity together as his mother rubbed her cheeks against his.

"I can't believe you actually got a date, I mean I knew you can reel them in." His father gave a quick smile. "You're going to need my advice."

"Not until after breakfast!" Mabel placed an omelet on the table in the shape of Dipper's head.

Dipper sighs in defeat and sat down to enjoy a good meal. He wasn't playing his all today when the weight of telling Kimmy the truth latches onto him, but Mabel gave one heck of a meal to keep him looking gloom in front of everyone.

After finishing his breakfast and hearing his family's encouragement, Dipper brushed his teeth upstairs and stood at the top of the steps.

" _My family really knows how to hype things. This will not end well._ " He took one deep breath. " _I don't see how this can get any worse._ "

"Dipper, my boy." His dad walked up and kneeled to him. "There's something I should tell you. Come to my room."

 **30 minutes later**

"And that's where babies come from."

Dipper just sat there, with no life in his eyes. "Goodbye childhood."

"And just for a reminder, that's not till you're an adult and married." Mr. Pines gave Dipper a heart warmed smile. "Also, you treat Kimmy with respect, and give her father even more respect and extra fear."

"I understand too much, dad." Dipper stood up and marched right out of his parents' bedroom. He closed the door, gave one look at it, and shivered horrifically. "I'll never set foot in there again."

Mabel was sitting on the couch and saw Dipper walking down. "Heeeeeey, Dipper. Are you-" Seeing that look on Dipper's face, Mabel's instincts told her to not say a word, which would otherwise bring up a memory she wants to stay in her brain's trash pin forever.

Dipper stood at the front door to clear his mind, which he now wished there was such a thing as brain bleach. Well there might be, he should check next summer over at Gravity Falls in some grocery market run by walking brains or something.

"Well, at least I have time before I run into Kimmy."

Dipper opened the door and there stood a timid looking Kimmy fiddling her fingers before gasping at Dipper's sudden appearance.

"Of course." Dipper put on a smile and waved. "H-Hey Kimmy, how's it going?" Dipper tried to lean on the door to look cool and confident, but end up tripping.

Kimmy let out a nervous giggle she tried to cover. "I-I-I'm fine!" She grinned widely. "So ….. are you ready …. To get creamed ice? I mean ice cream!" Kimmy sheepishly smiled with a red face.

"Y-Yes. Just to-"

"Hello!" Dipper's mom poked her head out the door, spooking the two of them. "You must me Kimmy! Come on in!"

Mrs. Pines attempted to reach out to Kimmy's hand, but the nervous ghost phased out and Mrs. Pines hand went right through. Luckily Mrs. Pines didn't notice until she walked three feet in and noticed her empty hand. "Huh?"

Dipper motioned Kimmy to keep her cool as Kimmy gained her physical form right when Mrs. Pines pulled her in.

The next ten minutes were filled with Mrs. Pines doing pretty much everything involving embarrassing their child in front of their date; including looking through old photos, stories, babying Dipper, taking sudden pictures (which thankfully Kimmy looked normal in without ghost features), their upcoming dates Kimmy and Dipper both denied, and ignoring their denial.

"Leaving now!" Dipper dragged Kimmy out of the house and the two walked away from the house with Mr. and Mrs. Pines waving goodbye, and Mabel shouting out from the second story window.

"You two rock! Eat Ice Cream and Screeeeaaaam!"

Dipper sighs painfully from the short yet active morning.

"Soooooo, where is this Ice Cream place?" Kimmy asked, trying to change the subject they just had.

"It's in the park near the lake. My treat." Dipper said as the two walked down the sidewalk, while Kimmy walks unusually close to him.

It was a peaceful and fun filled day at the park. Sons and fathers were playing catch, joggers ran on the pathway, an elderly woman was feeding the pigeons which some kids scared off, teenagers were hanging out and looking at their phones, and a hobo was throwing garbage at a butterfly.

Dipper and Kimmy walked down the pathway as they glance at everyone enjoying their free day (minus the ones who have to work on weekends. Pray for them.)

They reached the edge of the lake where the ice cream parlor stood. After waiting in line for a few moments, the two kids ordered their cones. Dipper took plain vanilla with sprinkles while Kimmy chose cotton candy, surprised that that was an actual flavor.

"Cotton Candy, s'mores, cinnamon bun, bubble gum, papaya, donut, coffee … honey mustard?"

They sat at a bench overlooking the sun reflecting lake as they enjoy their treat, well just Dipper.

"I have no taste buds." Kimmy randomly stated after a few licks. "Food has no meaning to me anymore."

Dipper watched Kimmy take another lick and swallowed it. "So what, does it just stay in your stomach forever?"

"Only until I phase out." She startled Dipper with a sudden glare. "Don't make any bathroom jokes."

Dipper was not into that kind of humor. The closest he did was pretending to throw up with silly string like at his Grunkle Stan's party. But just how Kimmy phrased that just made him chuckled.

"Mmmmmmm." Kimmy grunted at Dipper, but cracked a smile when Dipper started to look embarrassed.

The two laughed together as a fish jumped from the lake.

"Well this was pointless unless I possess someone." Kimmy smiled. "May I?"

"M-Me?" Dipper asked, but Kimmy gave him a playful smile.

"Hey look, a turtle." Kimmy pointed at a turtle on a nearby log in the lake, basking in the sun. "You know, some strange two legged turtle lives in this lake."

"Really?" Dipper smiled from curiosity. "Can you describe it more?"

"Well this thing has hair right on this head." Kimmy felt her head. "But has this huge bald spot right on top, I think it's a bald spot." She gazed at the lake. "I've heard about it somewhere of it before."

"Wait, it wouldn't be a Kappa, is it?" Dipper asked with concern.

"Yeah, that's it. They used them as a monster in Dungeons, Dungeons, and More Dungeons!" Kimmy smiled from a memory. "Boy were they too slow to use. I mean they're turtles, but-"

Dipper motioned her to step away. "Kimmy, Kappa eats kids!"

Kimmy gasped. "But we're kids! … Oh wait, I forgot it takes orders from the Guardian herself." Kimmy sigh with relief. "It did have a brother once, but he was completely bad. I mean really bad. It ignored too many of the Guardians warnings and she had to drag the turtle monster right to her lair, where it was never seen again."

"Wow. That fox really doesn't take it lightly." Dipper looked at the lake. "Say, does the water bother the Guardian, and how does the Kappa living today feels about it?"

"Not sure on the first question." Kimmy shrugged. "Just noticed the Guardian dragging it in the woods a while back and heard some rumors from fairies. I guess the brother just keeps his emotions in, but I'm sure he knows not to-"

Breaking through the surface, the Kappa Kimmy was mentioning jumped right out and took a huge bite out of Kimmy's ice cream. The Kappa laughed mischievously, but had a sudden brain freeze and jumped back in.

"… Well he could have just asked."

Kimmy and Dipper laughed as they walked around the park.

"So Kimmy, since you've been in the woods these ….. 40 years or so, do you know any other paranormal things around here?"

Kimmy thought to herself. "Not nearly as enough as in Gravity Falls, but I know quite a few." She looked at a tree. "Like that." Kimmy pointed up to where a squirrel was eating a nut. "See that squirrel?"

"Yep." Dipper looked at the squirrel gnawing at the nut. "What's up with it?"

"Wait for it….."

Dipper looked closely at the squirrel feasting as it stood near a hollow. "O.K., there's the squirrel and-"

And to make Dipper feel like he was standing in Gravity Falls, a squid appeared from the hollow and pulled the rodent right in.

"Woah!" Dipper shouted. "Did you just see that?! I mean of course you did! You pointed that out to me so you knew it was going to happen. I'm talking like a paranoid kid again."

Kimmy lead Dipper closer to the tree where a carving of a heart with 'M + M' written on it.

"This tree is actually a deformed …. Prehistoric shell squid thing."

"That will be a Orthoceras. Which I can't believe there's a prehistoric marine animal here, out of water!" Dipper jumped up and down at the tree and felt the bark. "How come no one ever noticed this? I mean this tree has leaves. Wait, does it?" Dipper reached for a branch and pulled out a leaf, but noticed that it looks unusually fake.

"I think you should ask the fairies on this one." Kimmy walked around the tree. "They usually come here to grab things from this guy. I think it's like a beehive to them."

Dipper stood back and took out his journal. "I can't believe I missed this all these years. And everything else! I mean really! How come no one noticed? Smartphones weren't always around."

Kimmy held her hand behind her back as she leaned close to Dipper a bit. "Pretty amazing, huh?" Kimmy took slow uneasy breaths, which was just from habit since her heart became worm food years ago. Boy was that dark.

"Are you kidding, this is great!" Dipper gave her a huge hug, catching the ghost girl off guard. "This is amazing, you have to tell me more."

Kimmy's face turned completely red. "W-W-Well maybe we can do this again ..next week?" She nervously laughed, which made Dipper realized what he was doing.

 **Flashback**

* * *

"So …. How am I going to tell her?" Dipper sat there at his computer desk with Wendy online, looking worried for Dipper.

"Dipper, remembered how you confessed out loud at the bunker?"

"Yes." Dipper miserably answered, recalling that embarrassing moment.

"Well our talk after that whole Shapeshifter thing, I knew that was coming." Wendy smiled. "I told you before it wouldn't work out but you are one of my best buds, so I made sure I try and let you down the lightest way possible. No way I ever want to hurt you."

Dipper smiled for Wendy's friendly advice.

"So I used my brain here and came up with what I would say to not sound harsh. Like, 'I'm too old for you' instead of 'you're too young for me' See where I'm going at?"

Dipper thought about it and seems to understand.

"I said that so you wouldn't feel bad about yourself instead of making it sound like I'm tossing you away because you're not my type or something like that." Wendy rubbed her head. "That makes sense, right?"

Dipper could tell she didn't have much experience talking about this. He's probably the only creepy kid who whispers not so quietly about her she had to deal with. But he understood well enough.

"So I'll tell her in my words that I'm not romantically good for _her_." Dipper held onto his arm. "I just hope I don't ruin it. She's … well you remember me telling you what happened at the orphanage?"

"I do." Wendy answered in a serious tone. "But I trust you can pull it off. Just remember to make her feel like a friend, just like a certain cool girl you know."

* * *

 **End flashback**

Dipper let go of Kimmy, who looked a bit disappointed. "Uh, Kimmy."

"Dipper." Kimmy rubbed her arms. "Can I ask you something?"

"Oh, what is it?" Dipper asked, feeling his talk needs to wait.

"Do you ever think back about that room?"

"Room?"

"Where we found the ….. murder scene."

Dipper eyes widened. The blood stained room, body marks of killed people including children, and the one in front of Kimmy's room.

"I …. I haven't really. Never had time to look around."

"Why?" Kimmy gave him an odd look. "Don't you remember when we did that séance and ….. oh." Kimmy's face turned red from recalling why Dipper wasn't there. "Eeeeeh, n-nevermind?"

Dipper also realized why and rubbed his head. "Well ….. that is something we should look into when we have time aside from school." Dipper looked around the park to see more people walking around. With Kimmy's ghostly powers run on emotions, this would be a terrible place to crash Kimmy's hopes. But at the orphanage ….

"Do you want to investigate that room?"

Kimmy's eyes widened. "Well, I hate blood …. But I'll do it."

Dipper quickly waved his hands. "On second thought, will you be alright going back?"

"I … I am." Kimmy gave him a soft smile. "I am part of the club after all."

Was this just to impress him? Dipper thought about last night on the intense awkward moment he had with both Wendy and Kimmy. It felt like the bunker all over again, but without the fear of a Shapeshifting monster. There was no turning back from this; he just needs to act more of a friend instead of a boyfriend.

"So let's go."

They left the park and walked down the road to the dirt path of the orphanage. After walking through and reaching the orphanage, the two entered the murder scene with flashlights in hand.

"So Kimmy, you're the only ghost here, right?" Dipper asked her. "Didn't see or sense anyone else after the whole ….. you know."

"No. I only stayed in my room." Kimmy said as she shined the light on one of the body marks of a child. She lay down next to it to examine the height.

"What are you doing?" Dipper asked the ghost girl.

"Not her." Kimmy sigh with relief to herself. "Just guessing who this was." She floated up and looked around. "My memory is kind of foggy of that Newspaper I found." Kimmy recalled the newspaper she found after death that informed her of the orphanage closing. "Maybe I died shortly before."

Kimmy never really opened up about her whole life to the boy, but Dipper recalled there was at least one person Kimmy was friends with, a friend who shared the same room and actually made her feel at home.

" _Maybe this wasn't such a good idea_." Dipper looked around and noticed the wall near the door. "Hey, what's that?" Dipper and Kimmy looked next to the entranceway and saw some unusual marks running down the wall.

The two walked close to it and Dipper took a closer look. "Huh, looks like huge scratch marks." Dipper looked at the distances and uneven angle of the marks. "It's as if some animal did … oh boy."

Dipper and Kimmy looked at each other in shock. "D-Dipper." Kimmy looked at the marking. "Iiiiiiis that a claw mark? Because from the distances between the marks, the claw has to be huge!"

Dipper looked at the claw mark again this was indeed no work of a bear or mountain lion. Heck, the closest thing he could guess by the estimate of the finger gaps are some aliens he'd seen in two good movies and two real bad ones.

Dipper looked around the room and at the entrance, there was no sign of a large animal breaking through, but using their lights, they saw no other markings similar. Not even the bloodstain could hide anything.

Dipper looked back at the markings and saw no traces of blood or any body tapes. "Well if this was from a monster, they didn't attack anyone here, unless they missed." Dipper trailed off and looked outside. "But there was that one scene in front of … Kimmy?"

Dipper noticed his ghostly date was no longer in the room. Dipper quickly realized where she ran off and left the room to follow the trail of blood where Kimmy was using herself to measure the murder scene in front of her room.

"Please tell me this isn't her, please." Kimmy stood up and looked at the tape, but at a closer look reveal that the body wasn't exactly whole. "Please ….. please …"

Kimmy nearly collapsed on the floor as she hugs her legs close. "Please …." Kimmy felt a light touch on her shoulder. She looked over to see Dipper sitting next to her. Without saying a word, Kimmy wrapped her arms around Dipper and held onto him quietly.

Neither one could tell how long they sat with each other.

After a long while, Dipper asked if his date was feeling better.

Kimmy nodded and finally spoke up. "Dipper." She took a deep breath and looked up at him. "I need to know what happened here. I just …. I just need to know."

"And we'll discover it." Dipper gave her a confident smile. "You can count on the Mystery Twins to unveil what happened here; along with Beethoven, Dyami." Dipper stood up and held his hand. "And you!"

Kimmy lowered her head in embarrassment and held her hand. Dipper grabbed it and helped Kimmy up, who remain silent.

"Kimmy?"

Kimmy had a small smile on her face. "Dipper. Wasn't there something …. You wanted to …. You know, ask?"

It was a bit hard for Dipper to read Kimmy at first, until it hit him like a speeding car. "Oh no." Dipper silently said to himself. "And of course after that." Dipper gulped as he looked at Kimmy who still can't look at him with a straight face.

This was it, Dipper need to let her down as gently as possible, like Wendy told him.

"Kimmy, I need your full attention on this. Because this won't be easy."

"I know that." Kimmy answered with a small giggle.

It hurt Dipper even more, seeing Kimmy blissfully unaware on where this is going. But there was no other way. "Kimmy …. We cannot be a couple."

"Yes!" Kimmy grinned widely. "I won't be your …" Kimmy's head rose up and her purple eyes widened from shock. "I-I-I …. I'm sorry, did …. Did you…" Kimmy could see it in Dipper's eyes. She heard him clearly.

"I'm sorry Kimmy. I thought this very carefully, but I'm not good for you." Dipper closed his eyes. "Last night, Wendy-"

"Wendy WHAT?!"

The next thing Dipper knew, he was being held up to the ceiling by Kimmy's elongated arm. "K-Kimmy! Wait!" The grip on Kimmy's hand slowly grew stronger as Kimmy looked up at the boy. Her neck snaps and cracks with every move as she glared at Dipper with pure white eyes.

"What did she say about you!? You said you're not good for me? She's your friend! She's supposed to support you!"

Dipper tried to break free, but then his arms and legs were held down by shadow hands.

"She said you're not good? Were you even listening when we spoke in my room!?" Dipper watched as Kimmy's neck extended. Her face just inches away from his, breathing a cold breath onto his face. "Unless ….. she wouldn't have changed her mind about you, did she?!"

"What? It's not you, it's m-" The grip of Kimmy's hand grew tighter around his neck as the ghostly hand slowly turned inhuman.

"Don't say that old line! This is about me, isn't it!? ISN'T IT!?"

Kimmy lighten her grasp to allow Dipper to catch his breath and speak. "Kimmy, It's not …. Well it …. It is, but-" Kimmy didn't allow Dipper to speak another word, she is losing herself.

"You probably changed your mind and want someone with a pulse, huh? Or maybe someone with an actual stomach to enjoy ice cream together! Or maybe someone with a real life and a real family so you don't have to hide me all the time! Is that it! Just that?!"

"K-K-" Dipper should be focus completely on Kimmy. Seeing the girls' face melt to reveal her horrid blood covered skull with the puncher on her forehead should be enough to silence his mind, but at the very corner of his eye, he spots something glowing. He slowly turned and was horrified by what he saw.

"The G-"

However more shadow hands grabbed Dipper's face and turned him directly to the skeletal Kimmy screaming. "I've lived through heck in this prison and not only did I lose my life as a kid, but now I fear what my only friend had to go through without me! She was weak! She got tired too easily! She was more than a freak than I was! Yet we were there for each other!" She leaned towards Dipper ear. "And now you're tell me that you, the first boy I ever liked and the one of the few people to show me kindness, even after what I've done, refuse to love me back!"

Dipper could no longer breath, Kimmy's claw choked the boy as Kimmy glared into his eyes with her soul piercing stare. "We could have been happy together for years. We could have grown up together and attend college and maybe even be married, start a family, and grow old together. Heck, I won't ever look a day older since-"

That was when it finally hit her. Her face slowly formed back to normal with a mix of realization, shock, and horror. "Oh …. Oh my ….." Her face started to tremble as she looked at what she was doing. "Oh OH MY-" After hearing loud panting, she slowly turned her neck like a snake and noticed something's mouth just inches away from her extended neck.

The Guardian.

The beast glared at her, giving a threatening look to release Dipper.

Kimmy wasted no time and evaporated the shadow hands, and she failed to see Dipper fall face first on the floor.

"Are you O.K.?!" Kimmy reverted back to her form to help, but the Guardian jumped in between them and snarled at the ghost.

"Wait, please ow ow ow." Dipper stumbled getting up and rubbed his face before jumping between the two. "Just hold on a minute!"

The Guardian still kept her threatening pose, but the look it gave Dipper told him that she'll hesitate not to attack if Kimmy goes out of line again.

Dipper gulped as he turned around to see Kimmy kneeling at her old bedroom door. "Kimmy?" Kimmy hid her face from Dipper.

"I …. I'm sorry. I … I got crazy again." Dipper could hear her voice starting to break in sorrow. "I … I broke my promise."

Dipper sat down next to Kimmy as the Guardian watches closely. "It's my fault, I-"

"You're going to say 'I should have realized the age difference sooner' and probably mention Wendy a few times."

"….. Yeah, something like that." Dipper placed his hand on Kimmy's shoulder, but it passed through. "Kimmy, Wendy was the one that pointed that out to me." Dipper rubbed his head. "Truthfully, I really do like you."

"I like you too …. Death is out of the question." Kimmy quickly turned to Dipper with a dreary look.

"What are you talking about?" Dipper asked.

"Good." Kimmy turned back. "I have problems, serious problems."

"What, nnnnnn …. You kind of do." Dipper really hated saying that, but it was the truth.

"No doubt it's from years of being bullied." Kimmy rose her head. "Know a good ghost psychologist?"

"No one on speed dial." Dipper chuckled.

Kimmy held onto Dipper's hand lightly, startling the boy. "I should have realized this too." Kimmy looked out the daylight window. "Heck, I probably ran into you and Mabel as babies before, maybe even your parents before they met."

"And you probably saw a lot more embarrassing moments of me back then." Dipper jabbed at himself, which cheered the two of them up with some laughs.

Kimmy's laughs died down when she gazed at the body tape on the floor. "It's still strange." Dipper turned to Kimmy. "I've told you before that I heard nothing about the murders during my time as a ghost. They didn't even clean the blood. In fact…." Kimmy looked down the hall. "Did you notice any foot prints in that room next to any puddles? What if the murders happened a long time before anyone reported it? But then what happened to the other kids and adults here? Why didn't they clean up the blood? And why only that room and here? Also you guys said the office desk was smashed. How'd that happened?"

"Kimmy, as much as I want to get obsess finding those answers, you're changing the subject."

Kimmy sighed. "You better get a good job when you grow up."

Dipper smiled as he glanced at the door. "Do you want to sit in there?"

Kimmy nodded as Dipper opened the door, but the Guardian snarled.

"She's O.K. now. Can you please give us a moment?" Dipper felt that the Guardian had respect for Dipper as it followed his request, but it laid down next to the door just in case.

Dipper closed the door and sat with Kimmy on one of the bed.

"Are you always this forgiving?"

"What do you mean?" Kimmy just looked at Dipper as if he said something stupid. "I hurt you just like all those other monsters. Do you feel sorry for them too?"

Dipper was never asked this before. There was the Shapeshifter, the Spider Lady, and plenty of monsters that just flat out attack them.

"No. Not even Robbie. But he did mellow out after hooking up with Tambry." Dipper smiled. "I mean they do the whole arm holding things and give each other pet names."

Kimmy giggled. "At least we'll never end up like that."

Dipper laughed along. "Dyami would probably throw up from our gushy in-your-face romance." After sharing another laugh, Dipper thought back about Kimmy's question. "Technically no. The very least was from monsters that attacked because of us, the Summerween Trickster after Soos made him happy, and Hand Witch after Mabel fixed up her cave."

(I have no idea if that horror shop episode is actually canon or not, but neither is this)

"Yeah, just you."

"Is it because you feel sorry for me?"

"S-Sorry?" Dipper tilted his head. "I was furious that you attacked Mabel, but they convinced me that you're more than just a vengeful spirit. I guess I forgave you because I knew you better before."

Kimmy recalled their first walk down the dirt road. She looked at Dipper with no red to her face. "So … friends?" Kimmy held her hand out, with no sign of shyness.

"Friends!" The two shook hands and smiled at one another. "And now I'm feeling some de ja vu. Only more happy."

Kimmy giggled. "At least this crush only lasted about a week or more."

"And not all summer with a pathetic step-by-step list and a box of photos." After sharing another laugh, Kimmy quickly hugged Dipper in a tight grip.

"And Dipper." Kimmy spoke in Dipper's ear. "Don't think too low of yourself. If I was Mabel, I'll give you a … well a sticker that shines, on your dating grade."

Dipper felt his cheeks warming up a bit.

"Buuuuuut, you still smell like baby wipes."

Dipper jumped a bit from Kimmy's hug, but the two just ends up laughing historically.

"Well, I think that's a wrap." Dipper jumped off the bed and smiled. "I have to think up an excuse on why this date didn't turn out to my folks. I don't think they'll respond casually to 'she's a 40 year old ghost, that's all."

Kimmy floated up and reached for the doorknob. "Who knows, maybe I should ask Mabel to find a ghost boy."

Right when Kimmy opened the door; on the other side was Mabel Pines herself, listening in with a cup as the Guardian just stood a few feet away looking rather confused by this.

It took Mabel a moment to realize what was missing from her eavesdropping. "Oh …. So it looks like you figured out the age difference loooooooooong before I realized it, at least you're not going to be crazy about it." Mabel laughed, which probably means she didn't see the earlier scene.

"Dyami, Beethoven! Everything's cool now!" Mabel called from down the hall.

"Let me guess, they have vacuums." Dipper added, which Mabel responded with a nod. Dipper sighed. "Well we should get going, we're doing a live stream tonight, you should meet our friends at Gravity Falls."

Kimmy nodded. "I never actually met them yet, let's go."

The kids walked down the hallway as Kimmy landed on the ground where the Guardian kept her glare. Kimmy looked away and sigh. "I'm not fine …. Why are you O.K. with me?" She held her chest and closed her teary eyes. "I wouldn't blame you if you actually did attack me." She turned at the Guardian. "If that ever happens again, please do anything to keep them safe." Kimmy felt her neck and looked into her old room one more time before floating away.

The Guardian's glare finally disappeared as the fox looked relief, for now. She then tilted her head and sniffed the murder scene. She was not around when it happened, but curiosity took over the canine as it followed the trail of old blood to the room.

The fox examined all the body tapes with a look of sorrow, but was used to seeing this side of the world. However the marks near the door did catch her attention. She walked over it and sniffed it a bit. There was no sent she could pick up, but the fox did notice the unusual markings and probably assume the same thing Dipper suggested, claw marks.

She placed her paw in between the lengths of the claws with wonder and then showed a look of concern for what had done this.

Suddenly, her green eyes shot wide open as her ears rose right up. The Guardian did not look like she felt a threat, but perhaps it was just a thought.

She calmed herself down as she gave the room one final glance before leaving the mystery alone.

 **End of Chapter**

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	57. Glass Shard Beach

**Chapter 57:** Glass Shard Beach

' _So it finally comes to this._ ' Stanford Pines wrote as he and his brother sail towards a harbor. ' _After our expedition to the Arctic ocean, we decided that we would stop by our old home, Glass Shard Beach._ ' Stan looked at the shoreline getting closer and closer as they head to an open space in the harbor.

' _We would spend just a day here, and then well sail again down south were we have the car. Stanley wasn't too fond of departing here first, with no doubt as to why._ ' Stanford just gazed at the city where he grew up in with the good and bad memories. ' _Besides the fact that our old childhood bully, Crampelter, is living in California somewhere close to the kids, I'm looking forward to see what else has changed. Sadly Stanley believes they'll still recognize him._ ' Stanford looked at his brother who is now wearing a ridiculous disguise which consists of a Hawaiian shirt, large sunglasses, a redhead wig, and a backwards cap. ' _Why is that hat position, as Mabel puts it, stylish?'_

Stanford looked back towards the ocean. ' _It has been one heck of a month, from finding Atlantis, running into one of Mabel's friends (oddly enough, wonder what he's been up to with his near divorce) and practically getting on the good side of the ruler of the ocean, Leviathan._ ' Stanford turned the pages of his journal and looked at the horrific picture he'd drawn. _'Even though he promised not to reveal himself to humanity and that we no longer have to worry about jellyfishes stinging us, I have a fear that the Leviathan will discover how much damaged we've done to the environment._ ' Stanford thought back to the old temple. ' _Put perhaps there are others creatures to reason with Leviathan, judging from those pictures in the temple. Clearly one of them doesn't get along with that fish serpent._ '

Stanford noticed they were about to pull in. ' _But as of right now, we are going home for one day, then off across the country to see the twins for a surprise visit, and attend Wendy's party._ '

After tying up the boat and getting themselves a permit, the two brothers walked out of the docks and looked at their old hometown.

"Wow, nothing much have changed." Stanford said as they walk down the old New Jersey City. Old shops, old homes, and a few businesses they recognized. Everything seems almost original.

"Except for all these Robbies running amuck!" Stanley shouted as they could see countless and countless of juvenile delinquents aimlessly walking around the streets. I mean really aimlessly, if there was no law against it, some very angry people would have run over a dozen of them by now just to clear the road.

"Seriously, when did these 'people of the dark' started repopulating here?" Stanley asked as Stanford noticed a poster on a pole.

"Punk-a-Palooza" Stanford read with annoyance. "Hear the new exciting band, 'Monster of the Week' sing to your dark souls that your parents love to hate because they're stupid and old. Featuring Love God." Stanford stood straight and angled his glasses. "Well this is too obvious."

"Want to explore home first and deal with this later?" Stanley asked as Stanford agrees. "I bet one hundred bucks it's the New Jersey Devil."

"Not going to take that bet, Stanley." Stanford said with a serious tone, knowing too well of the obvious.

It didn't take long for them to find the beach they used to hang out in. "Ahhhh, fresh sand, that ocean breeze, and more punks." Stanley looked around the goths hiding underneath umbrellas from the sun's rays. "You're all at a beach! Whatcha expect?!"

The boys walked close to the ocean and removed their shoes to let their feet soak in the tide. After about ten minutes, they came across a familiar location. "Say, it's that cave where we found our old boat." Stanley smiled as the two walked towards the entrance. "Looks like they boarded it back up." Stanley smiled as he pulled in his sleeves. "Aaaaaaaand, pow! Right in the slinta'!"

The boards broke in half and Stanley blew on fist to mimic guns. "No really, I think I got a splinter."

The grown men walked down the small cave path as visions of the past filled their minds.

"And this is where we found ol' Stan-o-War I." Stanley removed his sunglasses to see the shallow pool they found their old boat.

"This place hadn't changed a bit. Except for even more goths?!" Stanley shouted as the gloomy kids rose from the waters with snorkels. "Out of my cave, now!"

Stanley successfully removed all the kids out and relaxed after a rewarding chore. "When was the last time we hung out here, bro?" Stanley leaned on the cave walls as Ford sat next to him.

"It was after when … oh." Ford rubbed this neck as Stanley looked confused.

"What, did something embarrassing happen to you?" Stanley laughed, but his old memories struck his soul with a venom covered arrow. "Oh ….. we hung out here right after Carla Hotpants McCorkle left me for that Tree Hugger! And drove that said Tree Hugger's car into a ravine. And for some reason that made Carla angry with me." Stanley shook his head. "I still don't get it."

" _Why is it that he had far more luck with girls than me_?" Ford thought to himself. "So did you ever hear from her again?"

"Nope." Stanley answered. "Didn't even bother looking her up on NoLifeBook. For all I know she could be living the sweet life with that hippie in some fairy tale like life with no bills to pay." Stanley sighed as he imagines what it would be like to have Carla back. "Musicians are of the Jersey Devil …. You wanna take that bet now?"

"No."

"Darn it." Stanley stood up and took a piece of wood from the ground. "If I was some music loving pacifist wimp, I could have hold onto Carla longer until I ruined it on my own." He pretended to play the guitar with the board. "But at least I'm not Robbie." Stanley stuck his tongue out in disgust. "He said he had no idea about some hidden message in a song, but he admitted he ripped it off."

"I've heard about that." Ford recalled a time Dipper told him about Wendy's last relationship. "But that's all in the past." Stanford checked his watch. "We should see what home looks like now before that 'Monster of the Week' plays and do something diabolical to this generation."

"He's already late for the show." Stanley pointed up so see some teens acting like sleeping bats.

"I don't think these kinds of teenagers actually do that?" Ford said as he looked up at the teens feeling their blood-filled heads.

"It's funny, so who cares."

The brothers exit the cave to head for home, but noticed one more place.

"The swing sets." The Pines Twins said as the examined the old play area.

"Didn't look like they took the time to put care into this." Stanford examined the old rope. "This could easily-"

Snap

Stanford looked see his brother on the ground, attempting to have one good swing.

"Stan, are you O.K.?" Ford rushed to his brother side, who thankfully stood up and brushed himself off.

"It's going to take a lot more to put me down for a dirt name." Stanley and Ford looked at the run-down swing set they always loved playing on. Time really did a number on the past. "Stanley?" Ford looked at his brother who walked away from the swing.

"Let's just see if our old place is still standing."

With their heads down, they walked away from the old swing set, after a rock was thrown at it which caused it to collapse.

"Ha, I got it!" shouted a random punk.

After narrowly escaping the police due to a sudden violent outburst from Stanley, the men traveled to their old neighborhood and found new businesses running.

"At least they've kept this part nice." Ford said at the neighborhood with little to no graffiti and pollution, but most importantly no kids moaning about nothing important.

Stanley looked around the buildings. "This coffee shop used to be that shoe repair place, which means home is right around … oh great." Stanley sigh as Ford noticed their old home.

"Well there's no longer an antique shop there." Ford said as they looked at what became of their home. Something that Stanley dreads.

"The Preach Place?" Stanley said with annoyance as he looked at the happy faces painted on the windows. "They turned our old joint into a place that talks about 'good morals' and 'being a proper citizen' and blah blah blah snore fest."

"Can't be that bad." Ford said with a bit of confident. "Though with what you did with my name for nearly thirty years, I say this is just what you need."

"What I need?" Stanley laughed. "A 1980's business guide book was the only book I read in years, but I have the best street smart on this planet." He placed his foot on a fire hydrant and his fists on his thighs. "I've lasted alone for years with nothing but me and me. I have all the advice I need." He smiled with pride. "And there is nothing that will get me back into that dump, not even ….. even…"

Stanley's prideful mood faded when he spots an elderly woman walking out of the doorway. "Is … is that." Stanley's heart fluttered as he studied the face of the woman his age with a flower in her hair. "C-Carla?"

 **End of Chapter**

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	58. Old Flame

**Chapter 58:** Old Flame

"C-Carla?"

Stanley Pines looked over at his old home to find Carla McCorkle, his ex-girlfriend from years on passed, stepping out of 'The Preach Place' to place a poster on the window reading 'True Music'.

"It's her." Stanley smiled as beautiful music played and a majestic background was shown behind her as hearts materialized out of nowhere. "Carla Hotpants McCorkle. She hasn't aged a bit." Stanley gazed at her aged beauty painted with a soft smile.

"Oh, didn't even recognize her." Ford said in his usual analyzing tone, which disrupted Stanley's vision.

"Hey, I was having some weird lovey dovey moment or something in my head." Stan poked his skull. "But it's probably for the best." He sigh as he looked to his Old Flame (heh, he said it.) "She's probably having a great time with that hippie and his evil music."

Then a young version of Carla walked up to the elder.

"And she had a kid with him, big woop."

The younger girl, most likely a daughter, was acting kind of nervous. "H-Hey mom." She smiled sheepishly as she held up a phone. "I wanted to explore my ancestry and …. Can you tell me a bit about …. Dad?"

"…Dad?!" Carla's soft smile melted away and was reformed into a furious glare that pierced the heavens. "I REFUSE TO TALK ABOUT THAT MAN WHO LEFT ME THE MOMENT I WAS PREGNANT!"

"Hey, I'm still poor from failed music, can you take me back." Said the now old and withered hippie, who was then scared off like an alley cat by Carla.

"Thank you Paul Bunyan for this chance." Stanley licked his teeth to clean off any pieces of food and smiled. "Wish me luck, I'm going to win her back, and actually stay!"

"Stan, about that." Ford walked in front of his brother. "You do realize that you faked your own death?" Ford raised an eyebrow at Stan, who realized the big hole.

"Oh boy." Stanley felt his head. "Yeah, maybe I should just let this go." He sighed, which Ford felt sympathy for. "I mean how am I going to explain to her that pushed a car off a cliff with a sack of potatoes on the wheels and changed my name to yours, St-"

"Stanford?"

Stanley jumped back to see Carla standing next to them. She gazed at Ford's face as she felt her chin. "Yes, you are Stanford Pines." She gave the man a friendly smile. "I haven't seen you in years."

"Oh." Ford gave a fake smile. "That's me, and you were an ex-girlfriend of my brother, Stanley."

"Stanley….." Stan listened close for at least a hint of how she's feeling. "I …. I heard what happened …. the accident." She took a deep breath. "Sorry if I brought anything up."

"Oh, it's not a problem." Ford kept his calm as Stanley's started sweating.

"So what bring you back here?"

Ford briefly explained he was 'studying' the Arctic Ocean and wanted to check on his home since he was close.

"Well I would give you a warm welcome …. buuuuuuuuuT!" She slowly glares as she spots a punk carving his name on a tree. "Sadly there's this little party called 'Punk-A …. PaloooooozA' where some musical band is going to play some songs ….. songs of SIN!"

Stanley dreamily sighed as his heart flutters. "She's just as opposite attracting as I remembered. Even though I stated that I hate preaching places."

"Hm." She turned over to Stanley, catching him off guard. "Sorry, are you a friend of Stanford?"

Stanley recollected himself. "Oh, I'm the muscle of this guy's study trip. You can call me Steve Pinnington, but call me Steve."

"Well O.K., Steve." She smiled as she looked back to Ford. "As you can see, I bought out your old place when your parents …. Well passed on." She gave a worried look to Ford. "But I've kept your family's closes belongings and left yours and your brother's room alone."

"Glad all my clothed women magazines are at the Mystery Shack." Stanley said to himself as Carla waved her hand. "Safe in the trunk and away from fire."

"I should show you around, we're started a study soon." Carla opened the door to them.

"Study, do we look like kids trapped in school?" Stanley asked, which he was received a chuckle from Carla.

"Good one, now come on in."

The 'Preach Place', comparing to the old pawn shop, had plenty more room with no shelves or old junks, and refreshments. The only thing that was taking up space were the people who are attending the study session, who are all very secretive looking men in suits.

"We are from the Freemasons." One man stood up and showed his I.D. "You have the right to remain oblivious that we want to revive our deity who image is designed on the dollar bill."

"…. Wait, what?" asked Stanley.

"I had to lure them all in with cupcakes." Carla whispered to Stanford. "Now if only it would work on those HOOD-lems. That way I can kill two birds with one stone."

She had everyone sit down as she took out a book. "Now let's begin with some misconceptions of preaching." She opened up the book. "Number 1, don't be a jerk. Number 2, just read this book. Number 3, just because the other guy is being a jerk, doesn't mean you can be a jerk. Number 4, put those picket signs down and get off the American Flag. Number 5, money collected for charity goes to charity. Number 6, just because they're the same puzzle pieces trying to fit in together doesn't make them the ultimate evil. Number 7, how can you let that poor bald eagle die like that? He was scared in that huge and dark building and birds can't see glass!"

Ford was kind of frightened by Carla's sudden frantic tone, including the Freemasons who were secretly scanning him with some outdated technology, but not Stanley. The con artist was the only one to see beauty in this woman's wrath.

"She used to be so timid with her anger." Stanley recalls a heartwarming memory. "Like when she was scared to talk back to that guy harassing that kitten, so I knocked that guy out cold and shoved his unconscious body in a retirement home, before I dressed him up like an old fart." He rested his head on his hands as he listens to Carla shouting about ghosts burning crosses. "She aged just like grape juice."

At the corner of the room, a black fur mouse slowly nodded as it kept a glare on Stan while moving away.

However Carla then spoke about something poison to Stanley Pines.

"And remember, stealing is wrong."

An atomic bomb was dropped on Stanley's blood pump. "But ….. stealing's fun."

As Stanley's words echoed in the room, despite how low he said it, the vibration reached Carla's ears, causing the old woman to drop the book from shock.

"… Who said 'stealing was fun'?"

"THEM!" Stanley was quick on his feet to point at the Freemasons, who were about to place a metallic helmet on the un-expecting Stanford.

"Huh?" The Freemasons were then overshadowed by the elderly woman holding the book.

"If there is one thing I cannot tolerate, its thief." She cracked her neck and pointed out the door. "Down the street you will find Big Al's 'You Steal it, You Get Smashed' I suggest you take a turn and llllll-EARN a lesson which I cannot handle very well."

The Freemason gulped and ran out the door, dropping countless of evil looking inventions and old artifacts.

"Sorry you boys have to see that old side of me." Carla gave them a soft smile with a quickly calmed voice. "How about I show you around?"

As she walked away, Stanford whispered to his brother. "Was she always like this?!"

Stanley paid no attention as he looked at Carla with weary eyes. "If only you could see the joy of scamming stupid people and literally stealing candy from babies. I mean what are they going to do anyway, cry me to death?"

Carla lead the two men upstairs and it was just as you would expect from a woman her age; decorations, girly things, and other stuff that shivered Stan's bones.

"Soos's grandmother better not make the Mystery Shack like this."

* * *

"I made this place girly now." Abuelita said as she gazed as the elderly womanized living room.

* * *

"So is this bringing back memory?" Carla asked as the brothers looked around.

The two envisioned moments of their lives like playing when they were toddlers, holidays such as Halloween and Christmas, the time they've spent with their parents, and many more.

"And this is your old room." Carla opened a door and showed the boys the bedroom they once shared.

It was as if they'd never left (minus what Stanford packed away for college and his cabin in Gravity Falls.) Their bunk beds were still up, some photos were hung up from the past, even some movie posters Stanford had were still left untouched besides time.

Stanford blew the dust away off a poster of Mothgad. "This movie was great." He turned to Carla. "Say, how many more kaiju movies did they made … from the last thirty years or so?"

Carla shrugged. "All I know is some remake in the 90s with some iguana."

Ford felt it was best not to ask more as he looked around his bed. "It's been so long, can you give us a moment?"

"Sure." Carla turned. "There was actually something I needed to show you anyway." Carla walked away to leave the bros alone.

"It's been too long." Ford looked at Stanley who was gazing a photo of his parents along with him at the age of 12. His mother looked happy to be playing with him, his dad just has that usual unimpressed look he always had. No telling what he could be feeling, unlike the last time he saw him.

Stanley rested his hand on the wall as Ford placed his hand on his brother's shoulder.

' _You ignoramus! Your brother was going to be our ticket out of this dump! All you ever do is lie and cheat and ride on your brother's coat tails._ '

Stanley's heart started to race as his hand trembled.

' _But this time you cost our family potential millions! And until you make us a fortune, you're not welcome in this household_.'

"I left you hangin'."

Stanley looked at his brother Ford.

"I should have said something. I should have talked to him. I … I should have tried to find you."

"Don't worry about it." Stanley removed his brother's hand and gave him a thumb up. "We already made up."

There wasn't anything else Ford could say. He knew his brother's still hurting.

"I'm back." Carla walked in with a box in her hand. "It's …. From your father."

Stanley kept a calm look as Ford took the box. "He left something to me?"

"Doesn't sound like he was happy about it." Carla pointed at a note on the box. "It looks like something important."

Stanford looked at the note and read it out loud.

' _To my living son that didn't sent money_ '

Ford sighed.

' _You are my most likely son to do something with this, unless you have too much time on your hand with starting a family or something. Hope you used my old suit for your wedding day.'_

Ford gave a small glare to Stanley.

' _But if you do show your face around this part of the country, I hereby knight you or whatever as the last member of the Royal Order of the Holy Mackerel.'_

"The Royal Order of the Holy Mackerel?" Ford asked out loud.

"Isn't that the club that ddaaaan Pines, his name's Dan, right?" Stanley asked. "Anyway, you mentioned something about some club he got that fez, right?"

"Yyyyeah. He didn't really say anything about it." Ford continued reading.

' _Truth be told, it ain't easy here ever since your mother passed. It's just me alone here in the pawn shop. At least Shermie in town with a nice girl. I bet $100 bucks he'll have great grandkids.'_

"Should have betted his life savings." Stanley said to himself.

' _But what's in this box is very important. I need you to … hold on, getting hungry. I'll finish this after another burger over at McHeartAttack.'_

And that's where the note ends.

"Seriously, he ends it right there after writing his one-way ticket to He-" Carla glared at Stanley. "Heck …they're the same thing, Lady!"

Ford looked at the package and pulled the tape off. "Time to see what I inherit." Ford opened the box and found a very old and unique looking rounded cage. Closer examination showed Ford that this was actually a lantern with bone-like red bars swirled around the candle place with an iron holder on top.

Carla was sort of interested, but wasn't very pleased. "Such a thing must have come from that store, 'Heat Subject'." Carla folded her arms.

Ford looked at the lantern more closely. There were no inscriptions on it, no opening, just the remains of the last candle. "Interesting." Ford took it out of the room and sat on the couch. "Doesn't look manufactured." He tested the weight. "Entirely metal, very well made." Ford noticed no weak bars. "But what did Dad want me to do?"

"Are you O.K.?" Carla placed her hand on Ford's shoulder. Her face showed she wanted to say more, but couldn't find the right words to bring up.

"I'm fine." Ford smiled at her. "My curiosity was what drove me to my research and great discoveries." He looked at the old lantern. "Now I have something personal to my father and ….. the letter just left me hanging like that."

Carla placed her other hand on Ford's six-fingered hand. "I never actually revealed this to anyone, but I always wanted to be a genius." Carla chuckled as she examined the sixth finger. "You've won so many rewards at school, I'm sure you've discovered great things."

Ford looked into her eyes and something sparked between them.

"Oh, well….." Ford's smile started to crack as his cheeks reddened. "It's actually quite shocking what I've learned in Gravity Falls. You probably won't believe me if I told you."

"Well….." Carla slowly moved her eyes away with a smile. "I've been on this planet for a while now and I've seen some crazy things too." She looked up at the man that everyone once thought of as a freak, but now she sees a new light in him.

"Well, here we go-"

"TO THAT PUNK PARTY WE'RE GONNA CRASH!"

With no consent at all, Stanley pulled Ford up and practically dragged him away from the shock and confused Carla and out on the curb.

"Stanley Pines, what have gotten into you!?" Ford shouted at his brother.

"I know what's going on here!" Stanley pointed his finger at his brother. "Now that you're some big shot that actually exercised, you were going to do the biggest pain in the butt move a brother could do!"

"And what might that be, Stanley?" Ford folded his arms, not looking the least bit pleased.

"Steal your brother's girl." Stanley said furiously. "Just when I thought I can win her back, she's now flirting with you." He turned him to a lady down the street. "Why not hit on her instead. Looks like she's running for mayor."

Ford looked at the woman who was oddly smiling at a balloon she was holding and in her other hand was a very cheap looking leash attached to what may be her husband panting like a dog as he looked at some woman walking by.

"On second thought, never mind her."

Ford pinched between his eyes. "Stanley. You do realize you're band in this state? And judging from her club, she would have no interest in ….. that was flirting!?" Ford then put on the biggest and most stupid looking grin he had ever worn. "Is it really true? That's what flirting with a human woman is like? Not some android octopus Rick always pulled?"

"…Android octo-Whatever!" Stanley grasped his brother's shoulders. "Just listen here. We may have finally gotten along after all these years, but I will never, ever, let you take my fishing pole and reel in the greatest fish I had ever caught."

Ford was about to answer, but then several punks ran down the street.

"Punk-a-Palooza! Punk-a-Palooza!" They all chanted as one teen shouted at the Pines Twins. "I can't wait to get my soul sucked!"

"….Don't you dare forget this talk after we save the day." Stanley scolded his brother as he follows the punks.

Ford shrugged it off as he held onto the lamp and went along with his brother.

 **End of Chapter**

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	59. Punk a Palooza

**Chapter 59:** Punk-a-Palooza

Far down the unpopulated beachline area of the New Jersey city stood a stage decorated with ghoulish and family friendly decorations that attracted countless of punks to this one-time event, Punk-a-Palooza.

Hiding in the shrubs at the forest region are the Stan Twins, watching very closely at all the punks doing inappropriate stuff that would normally be shown off screen.

"Geese, at least I'm mature-ish." Stanley said as some teens eating chalk.

"Death to learning!" they all shouted with joy.

Ford was scanning the area with some satellite like device with his dad's lantern tide to his belt. "Interesting….." Ford looked at the information on the screen. "I'm getting an odd reading from somewhere, and yet it looks like-"

"Well look who it is." The twins turned around to see Carla and her daughter pulling a cart with preaching themed products. "I see you two are willing to help out to teach these young ones to not listen to puuuuutrid, trash." Her smile cracked a bit as she held out two crosses. "Here you go, you might need these."

Ford was very eager to receive the cross. "I shall cherish this gift from you till I reach my demise."

Stanley grunted by the sight of Carla finding Ford's geekish charm likeable.

" _There he goes again._ " Stanley thought to himself. " _I really need to up my game as Steve Pinnington or I'm gonna lose her. Now how am I going to do that?_ "

" _You could tell the truth to her_."

" _Wha-who said that?"_ Stanley looked around, but only saw his brother quoting Dungeons, Dungeons, and More Dungeons to Carla.

" _I am not physical, I am in your mind_."

" _Bill?!_ "

" _No, he is gone ….. maybe. I am something that had lived in your mind for ages, your conscious."_

" _Ha, nice try Bill Cipher! Everyone knows that conscious don't exist!"_

" _Seriously, how long was I stuck in between those brain cords?"_

" _I dunno, were you there when I do nice things for the kids that doesn't make a profit for me?"_

" _I-I just look. You want to have Carla back, don't you?"_

" _Yes hallucination that probably came from something I smelled from over at that party."_

" _What you need to do is come out straight about who you are and talk to her, and also listen, listen to her words and express your feelings and-"_

" _Express my feelings? What am I, a pansy?"_

" _No, it is strength that you reveal what's in the heart and-"_

" _No way, I'll just make myself look like an even bigger loser than before. Wait a minute, how do I know if you're some mind reading trick the Jersey Devil's playing?"_

" _That will be rehashing Mascasa."_

" _Who?"_

" _Never mind, you idiot!"_

" _Hey, no one calls me an idiot, not even a stupid cricket who talks to puppets! Now put 'em up!"_

"… _. Do you actually think you can fight me? I'm just a voice in your head to tell you the difference between OW!"_

" _Ha, I can still punch things in my mind!"_

" _Oh that does it!"_

As Stanley experience the most strangest mind conflict, Ford was showing Carla his findings. "I've scan these teens and discovered a phenomena within each one."

"Oh really?" Carla looked at the teens singing together. "Well isn't it obvious? … THE JERSEY DEVIL!" Carla randomly shouted, which thankfully the teens couldn't care less about some old people in the woods. "He corrupts and destroy everything he touches due to the envy in his harden heart!"

* * *

Down a dark, wooden road, a couple was walking down hand in hand as something moves within the trees.

" _The Jersey Devil has lived in these woods for generations, awaiting his chance to snatch away the wandered sheep of humanity."_

A quadrupedal creature landed from the trees and ran towards the two with clapping feet. " _He was the 13_ _th_ _child of a woman in the old colony days who cursed him to be a devil_."

The creature ran to the couple and filled their hearts with fear as the creature stood on its high legs and slash its claws.

" _Fallen from humanity, it shall do everything in its power to lead humans to destroy the temple, their soul, and be fallen just like he is."_

The creature spreads its wings after a successful hunt and fly back into the trees to look for its next victim.

* * *

"That is why we must preach and bring people back to the light, or watch them become like this." Carla gestured to a teen dancing with a llama.

"….. I don't think the end result will be 100% like this, or that?" Ford cringed at a teen prancing around with some weird paint on this face. "But I see your point."

Stanley managed to win over what he calls a sign of insanity and looked over at Carla. "Well that bug's out of the way, but how am I going to win my dream girl back?" He looked back at the stage. "If only there was someone that will appear right on stage that has something relating to love."

Just like an answer to his prayer, an announcement was being made as spotlights shined on stage.

"Introducing our first act, Love God!"

"Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeey!" Shouted the cherub of love that once crossed path with the Pines Twins, Love God. "Who's ready to be rocked by the power of looooooooooove!?"

All the goths went silent for a brief moment before they all booed at the angel and started throwing garbage in anger.

"We hate love!" "I want to litter because I hate the Earth!" "I don't want to love my parents, teachers, and other adults!" "I knew it! We're threw, Jack!"

Love God wasn't taking this treatment lightly. "What's wrong with your little heads!? My jams are gonna rock the world and make everyone flipping happy and-" As soon as a soda bottle hit his face and covered him in sticky soda, Love God threw a bottle to the crowd as screams of terror filled the crowed. "What a bummer, Man!" Love God jumped off the stage and folded his arms. "And here I thought the internet was doing my job so well."

"It just had to be some weird hippie." Grunkle Stan said with annoyance. "But when life gives ya lemons, cut 'em up and squirt the juice in the cops' eyes."

Stan walked away from his brother and Carla and spoke with the Love God. "Say, you got advice on-"

Suddenly, Love God jolted up and held his hands up. "What's this feeling I'm feeling?" He moved his hand around and made 'boop' noises.

"Nevermind." Stan turned around, but Love God jumped right in front of him. "I sense a major messed up heart here and boy does it need the magic touch."

"Leaving, NOW!" Stan shoved Love God away, but the Cherub was not having any more disrespect.

"Hey old dude, what's your problem?"

"My problem?" Stan gestured to Ford and Carla getting along as they watch a goth trying to operate a candle stick phone. "I ruined my chance with that girl and I faked my death years ago, but now she's getting all cozy with my own brother."

Love God used his hands to mimic binoculars and zoomed on the two. "Well I can easily tell you if they're meant for each other or not, and I can also tell ya if you're supposed to be with her or not."

"And you're just going to tell me right before a huge interruption, are ya?"

"You bet my lucky jeans ya!" Love God shouted. "What your heart is crying out for, and what her heart is crying out for, is-"

"HEY, CHERUB!" shouted someone from a distance that doesn't sound quite human. "You're supposed to enthrall these young deluded minds in order to enhance my introduction!"

Love God clench his fist and shouted back. "Those young dudes hate me, oh evil sounding guy that hired me who I never met face to face!"

"It's me you fool! The one that stalks this forest for years!"

"Have no clue."

"Forget it, just make sure they all stay within the area so I may test my new spell in hopes this will not fail."

"Whatever." Love God shrugged and turned back to Stan. "So anyway, your heart and her heart are … JERSEY DEVIL!"

"What?"

Love God looked around in a heroic stance. "Minion of the Prince of Evil, show yourself!"

"No."

Love God made haste as he ran into the forest, leaving Stan without his knowledge.

"Geese, he needed a bath." Stan covered his nose as he walked back to Ford. "Say, I think I know when the Jersey Devil is going to show up …. Wait a minute." Stan noticed that his brother was all alone without Carla and her daughter. "Where did they go?"

"She forgot something at home." Stanford mentioned. "She left me in charge with handing these small books out." He handed a booklet out with a grin. "You think I could get her telephone home number after this?"

"Oh give me that!" Stan swiped the booklet and read it. "Wow, this text isn't unreadably small enough. I say shrink it twice as much." He tossed the book and took his brother's attention. "Listen, bro. I think our Monster of the Week is-"

"Introducing, the Monster of the Week!"

"Does everyone want to interrupt M-"

"Moo." said a random cow.

"Oh what the-"

"Finally! It's starting!" the punks cheered as smoke filled the stage and the lights die down except for a single ray aiming towards the center.

The bros quickly duck into the shrubs as Ford took out his scanning device. "There it is, the source."

Smoke appeared on stage as a shadowy figure moved towards the light.

"Good evening, ladies and gentlemen." The figure spoke in a formal tone, which the punks weren't fond of.

"Hey, he's speaking like a grown up, boooooo!"

The figure quickly changed his tone. "I-I mean are ya ready to stone, I mean rooooooock?!"

The punks then cheered on as three more figures appeared.

"Now let me introduce, Monster of the Week!" Three more spotlights shined on the three figures to show cartoonishly demon-looking band players as they rock to the heavens with music that was definitely not in taste with our heroes.

"Who wrote this garbage?" Stanley asked as Ford tried to tolerate the tone

"This generation truly is doomed." Ford then looked at the shadowy figure holding a microphone. "And it's about to get worst."

The figure then sung a dark song that touched the souls of the punks. "Homework bad ….. school bad … breaking the law is good … fast food is good."

Despite the horrific music playing, the twins could tell that the singer wasn't nowhere near as enthusiastic as his fans. For all they know, he could be very talented if he had at least something decent to work with.

"Graffiti good. Paper is bad. Activity is bad. Mast-Oh just start it already!" the figure shouted as the demon band players as their instruments glow.

"Luos ruoy kcus annog ammi! Luos ruoy kcus annog ammi!"

The twins gasped as all the teen's eyes glowed white as a strange mist appeared from their mouths.

"What the heck's happening?" Stanley asked as Ford knew what this was.

"He's capturing their souls!" Ford shouted as he drew out his ray gun. "They're hypnotizing them with the type of music they enjoy, which thankfully we're immune to due to the fact we know what music actually is!"

But right before Ford pulled the trigger, the stage itself somehow exploded.

The souls retreated back into the bodies of the teens who saw what looks like a burned horse standing on stage.

"I guess it's over …. Let's trash this place even more!"

The punks cheered as they let loose their inner horrible person around the burned horse.

"Rrrrraaaaaah!" the horse shouted as he marched off stage and walked into the forest with the other demons following.

Ford motioned his brother to follow them quietly. Stanley did some other more complicated motions which were not understood by his smarter brother. "It's from my candy crime days."

And so the Stans followed the demons into the forest of New Jersey, what will they discover about this monster that had lived in these woods for years? Will Stanley ever reveal the truth to Carla? Who left that necklace for the Stans and spoke with Leviathan? What is that lantern for? Will Love God have an actual role in this? Is Kimmy a Mary Sue? I'm I gonna throw in more obvious references to my other stuff? Why is the sky blue? What's for dinner? Where am I? Will we be seeing cloned birds from that baby chick in the amber? Should we give fossils a funeral? Should I bring politics into this?

Scratch that last part.

 **End of Chapter**

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	60. The Jersey Devil

**Chapter 60:** The Jersey Devil

The twins followed the demons into the woods where they saw their monster of the week rinsing his head in a river.

"Back then; we had barbarians, savages, cannibals, politicians!" The Jersey Devil shook head dry and turned to the demon band. "Well we still have them, but at least we actually had a decent quality of fine music!"

Ford and Stanley looked directly at the beast they always dreamed of capturing as kids, the Jersey Devil. He looks almost identical to a horse, but not as strongly built as one. Other features this monster had are his black fur coat, folded demon wings with red membranes; ram horns, cougar-like paws on his front legs, and the traditional demon hook tail.

"Say bro, we did good." One demon player said as the others nodded. "You know, with our jams."

"It's not you, and I told you not to call me bro." The Jersey Devil said as he bent his front leg forward to wave his paw. "You have quite the talent, but it's the lyrics these kids somehow enjoy!" He crushed his paw as a shadowy aura formed around it. "The actual Devil himself has the most outstanding voice in this world, and yet now he wastes his talent on this 'Damn them real quick' scam." Jersey bent this paws with a displeased look.

"Can we say the word, 'damn'?" Another demon asked.

"Do you think I care of that language? Though I do hate such words that relate to the desire of flesh, both natural and strange." The beast shivered. "Or reference of scat."

One of the demons snickered.

"Silence!" The Jersey Devil shouted at the demon who quickly stood straight up. The horse monstrosity sighs as he glanced up to the stars. "Why must I live my life in such disgusting times, especially in this run down location?"

"Hey, it's not that bad." Ford spoke silently. "Is it?" He whispered to his brother, who only shrugged.

From a hollow tree, the Jersey Devil took out an old book and opened a saved page on soul sucking. "And do you know what's worse than being stuck here, my minions?"

"Uhhh, you just hired us for this band."

"Is that I can't do anything with these people and this amateur spell book!" The Jersey Devil held up the book where it shows a soul sucking spell in a simple addition formula. "I mean it took me nearly all summer to figure out all the steps I had to do that this plus sign supposed to 'symbolically' represent!" He tore the old book a part and stomped it in the ground. "If only my original technique wasn't lost to me; or better yet, my plan for that unclaimed land to the west hasn't been foiled all those years ago ….. well few years, but you know how I feel."

"We're not getting you, man." The band member said as the others nodded.

This bit of information caught Ford's curiosity. "Land of the West? What can he possibly mean, and what use does it have?"

"He means Gravity Falls."

Ford was shocked by his brother's sudden answer. "Gravity Falls? How do you know that?"

Stanley Pines only shrugged. "I don't, but it just sounds like the obvious answer." He responds with a smile. "And the obvious choice to bet big bucks on!"

The twins looked back at the horse monster. "Oh that land in the west. Gravity Falls, the name it was given."

"Yes!" Stanley quietly cheered to himself.

"So what other speculations do you have, Professor Stanley?" Ford played around as his brother mimicked himself.

"As the big brain boy over at Money Hungry University, I can scientifically predict in my scientific crystal ball that this guy's about to sing."

And right on que, a tone was heard from nowhere as the Jersey Devil looked more shallow and ready to express what's in his heart. "This world, it has-"

"There you are!" But much to the devil's dismay, Love God jumped from the trees and landed right in front of the demon ….. well landed face first, but he was quick to pick himself right up. "I have come to end your reign of hate and-"

Eye for an eye, the Jersey Devil rose up on his high legs and grasp Love God by his paws and ram him right through the shrubs the Stans are hiding behind and slammed him onto a tree.

"No one interrupts my masterpiece score! NO ONE!" With fiery brimstone in his eyes, the Jersey Devil gestured around the forest. "Not the bats in the sky. Not the chipmunks slumbering in the ground. Not the owl that perches in the tree. Not the humans in the shrubs. Not the squirrels who prepare for the fierce winter. Not the ….." The Jersey Devil slowly turned to see the Stan Twins who were just in the middle of slowly slipping away.

"I'll deal with you two shortly." Jersey glared at Love God and bumped him into the tree. "Not even a failed Cherub who was kicked out from high above for …. Why are you down here again?"

The Love God's only response was a burp to the monster's face, giving him an indescribably look of disgust. "I shall wonder no more." Jersey dropped Love God to the ground and gave him a good back kick right to his stomach. "Enjoy your time in this miserable world for as long as it lasts." Jersey Devil turned his attention away from the beaten Love God and looked directly at the twins. "So who might you two be?"

Ford was the first to respond, by drawing one of his other-dimensional ray guns and aimed it right at the Jersey Devil's head. "Not another move! We're on to you!"

"Yeah you freak of nature!" Stanley shouted. "We saw what you were trying to do with that hocus pocus stuff!"

The Jersey Devil looked at the weapon with slight curiosity. "I see humans are advancing more, but this is nothing to me." He smiled softly. "Go ahead and see what that would do." Jersey pushed himself back and spread his wing. "Try and strike me down. But be known that silver bullets shall do nothing to me unlike Werewolves, and silver is a very poor material to be used to make bullets!"

What the Jersey Devil was not expecting was a laser to be shot out instead and zapped right through his wing, delivering a sharp pain to the demon. "Yyyyyyaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!" The Jersey Devil pranced around in pain as he blows on his wounds.

"Quick, while he's distracted!" Ford motioned Stanley to move around the Devil, but the Demon Band jumped at them.

"Not so-"

But the leader of the band checked out early by a punch from Stanley Pines.

"Yo, boss?" the other band member poke the unconscious demon with a stick, and the rest quickly carried him out of the story.

"Well that was easy." Stanley brushed his knuckles as Ford kept a close eye on the Jersey Devil.

"I'm impressed, you managed to surprise me. How else am I going to fly properly?" Jersey spoke about his wounds he received. "However am I going to get the advantage of putting you to the grave? If only I can-"

"You're wing is going to rapidly heal, is it?"

"Well there goes the surprise." Jersey Devil said with mild annoyance as the membrane regenerated.

"Great, another one." Stanley stood close to his brother, ready to knock the living daylights out of the monster. "Before we dance, why not tell us what was up with you and those rotten teenagers?"

Jersey smirked. "I see we agree upon the current state of the younger humans of this gener-"

"Just get to the point!"

Jersey growled. "I want to absorb their souls to increase my power, thus aiding me for my own gain later on." Jersey raised his wings up. "If you hate them, you should have left them by the hands of me."

"Oh yes, because you sucked their souls sooooo perfectly. You can barely see the life in their make-up covered, cellphone screen burned eyes." Stanley laughed.

Jersey glared at the man, but noticed something peculiar. "Have we met?" The Jersey Devil tried to move close, but backed away by Ford's gun.

"Not one step closer!"

The Devil raised an eye at Ford's stance. "Yes ….. yeeessss. You're Pines, aren't you?" The shock looks on their faces was enough to confirm his thought. "You have that dirty look of Filbrick Pines. The last member left of The Royal Order of the Holy Mackerel."

"The Royal Order of the Holy Mackerel?" Stanley asked as Ford looked concerned.

"Well he was, until he returned to the ground. Which means …" He grinned, revealing his horse teeth. "You two are the new members."

"Just him." Stanley pointed at Ford, who received a glare by his brother.

"Yes … the twin boys. I remember you now."

* * *

 **Flashback**

"Jersey Devil! Jersey Devil!" The two brothers in their younger days were in the forest on a mission to find the Jersey Devil.

Dressed as explorers with oversized helmets, they called out to the monster to get him to come out. (Say, did anyone just try and call out 'Bigfoot' and see if he responds?)

Out of the trees, The Jersey Devil softly landed behind them without the slightest peep. With a sly grin, the Jersey Devil tip toes behind them. When the boys looks back, the Devil swiftly fly into the trees, leaving no hint for the boys to find.

He did this for five minutes before saying to himself. "Is this really the highlight of my day?" and left.

* * *

"Indeed it was." The demon said with no joy. "Anyway, sons of Filbrick."

"Ford and Stanley." Ford spoke as they points to themselves.

"Potato Potato." The demon said.

"That doesn't work here." Ford corrected the demon's choice of words.

Jersey scratched his chin. "Doesn't matter. You're all just blood of that human who has foiled my plans time and time again."

"Foil?" Stanley asked. "When did all this happen? Is that why he missed my softball game that one time?"

"And what is the Royal Order of the Holy Mackerel?" Ford asked. "And don't think you can dodge any questions."

"Father issues, I presume?" Jersey smiled from the looks on Stanley's faces. "Well you have the right to know." Jersey Devil said as he held his paw up and created a vision through a small black cloud. "It all started when the early humans of Europe migrated to these lands."

* * *

In the vision, it shows some pilgrims all wounded from battle.

"How dare that devil not let us hunt here." One settler said to the other. "It's as if he owns this place."

The other man spat on the ground. "Do you want to start an organization dedicated in killing that monster?"

"Sure."

* * *

"And that's how The Royal Order of the Holy Mackerel came to be." Jersey Devil finished his story.

"….Is that it?" Ford asked.

"They've done other things as time went by; but for their origin, they _really_ wanted to trespass." Jersey Devil shook the clouds apart. "And I don't mean that as the new world itself. I just mean my territory, this small area." Jersey pointed to the ground. "Not many game to be have here, I'm afraid." The Jersey Devil felt his rumbling stomach. "Especially with what humans have done with the place." Jersey looked down at the ground and picked up an item. "Trash, just who leaves this laying around?"

"So if my dad was a part of some club meant to make a fur coat out of you, why didn't they do that already?" Stanley asked the demon.

"Two reasons." Jersey held two fingers up. "One, I'm not easily killed." Jersey Devil incased himself in a dark aura. "And two … they're getting paid by the Government to make sure I die. And the members just love to savor their time with me."

"Sign me up, Ford." Stanley spoke. "Wait, Government? Nevermind!"

Jersey calmed down and closed his wings. "And your father was annoying throughout the ages." Jersey slowly paced around as they stare at each other's moves. "He and his allies hunt me down, I kill a few, they flee, time goes by and repeat." The Jersey Devil stopped. "They were just an annoyance, until one day …." He stood up on his high legs. "Your father stole a very important treasure from me!"

"Ha, he's a crook too!" Stanley laughed. "Wait a minute …. How much and it better be AFTER he kicked me out!?"

"Indeed he was." Jersey fiddled his paw. "I tried to confront him about it years passed, but…."

* * *

 **Flashback**

Filbrick Pines was walking down a dark rode while eating a questionable looking burger from the bag.

Then out of the shadows came the Jersey Devil. "Fil-"

Before Filbrick could even acknowledge Jersey's presence, he had a heart attack and died.

"-Brick." Jersey just stood there, looking at the dead body he pokes with a stick, and slowly retreated.

* * *

"Sadly I don't know where he lives and it's hard looking him up and asking people, since I'm an evil looking horse with wings." He grinned widely. "So I must ask you, you wouldn't happen to….." His smile slowly faced as he eyes something on Ford.

"What are you looking at?" Ford followed Jersey's gaze around his waist. He looked down and noticed the inheritance his father left him in that box.

"Foolishly bring along my lantern!" Ford covered the lantern as the Jersey Devil laughed. "I don't believe it! My lantern! It has returned! Bwa ha ha ha ha! Bwwwwaaaaa haaaa haaaa haaaa NYEEEEH, NYEEEEEH, NYEE-" Jersey quickly covered his mouth to stop his horse laughter.

With a small snicker from Stanley, the Jersey Devil quickly shouted. "It's not funny!"

He marched right over in anger, but Ford zapped through ground. "I said back."

"Ya heard him, horseman." Stanley laughed. "Just as long as Ford has a good shot at anything important. We'll crack as many insults as we want, Monstermon reject, or whatever that confusing kids show is called."

Ford smiled. "Why yes you ... chimera … chimera coward!" Ford smiled as he checked his laser. "You'll be answering our questions and leave the humans alone, or else I'll have to use this-" Ford's eyes opened widely when he noticed something quite crucial about his laser. "This clearly 100% charged laser that I … miraculously can charge anywhere despite not being the moonlight running edition, especially in the ocean with … limited energy sources. Very handy to wield and dangerous to anger. I suggest you-"

"Ford. My eyes may be at the side of my head, but I can still read facial expressions very easily." Jersey grinned as he dashed right to the twins.

Both of them managed to dodge in the nick of time, but the monster swiftly steered using his paws and charged straight to Ford.

With no time to react, Jersey pushed Ford to the ground and held him still with his paw. "Just relax, Ford." Jersey said with his claws pushing into Ford. "All I need is something that rightfully belongs to me." Jersey reached for the lantern, but Stanley jumped right on his back and pulled his horns.

"Get off me!" Jersey Devil shouted as he acts like a raging bull in a rodeo as Ford quickly moved away.

As Jersey jumps and kick, Stanley held on tight and delivered several punches to the demons' face.

"Say, did my dad ever done this before?"

"No." Jersey answered with annoyance.

"HA!" Stanley shouted. "Hey Ford, take a picture!"

Jersey Devil pranced and shook as violently as he could to rid himself of the elder acting like a cowboy.

"Enough!" The Jersey Devil's body began to melt into a black goop and Stanley fell over.

"Please tell me I won!" The disgusted Stanley hoped as the black goop moved towards Ford.

Ford ran off while searching himself for any charged weapons to use. "If only we were close to the Stan-o-War II! Why wasn't I fully prepared!?"

* * *

 **Flashback**

Ford was packing his things while talking to Carla.

"So how did your science fair project work before? I bet it would have been fascinating."

Meanwhile inside Ford's head. " _I can't believe it, a girl is talking to me! Yes yes yes yes yes yes!"_ Ford thought to himself as he packs a squirrel in this bag.

* * *

"Well that explains this." Ford looks at the squirrel in his hand that he quickly threw before it bite him.

The blob tried to reach for the lantern, but Stanley threw a large rock at it, disrupting its pattern.

"Ya got anything?" Stanley asked the frantic Ford as the blob regains his true form.

"Nothing with energy." Ford stated as Jersey's head reappeared from the black blob. "Just this cross." Ford held up the cross, but Stanley quickly swiped it from his hand.

"Hey! That was a gift from an actual human female!"

Stanley flipped the cross with the longer piece sticking up. "And now I'm giving it to this horse, right in the eye!"

Stanley held the cross up and was about to strike the Jersey Devil, but as the demon looked upon the wooden cross, the monster's eyes shot wide open. "Wait, stop!" The Jersey Devil sprouted his wings and flew gusts of wind at Stanley. As it regained its full form, the Jersey Devil backed away and bent down in a cowardly way. "You win! I surrender!"

Stanley stopped his attack and gave the Jersey Devil a surprised and odd look. "Wait, you give up?"

The Jersey Devil nodded. "Y-Yes, just … just don't use that!"

Stanley looked at the cross and smiled. "Boy do I have to write the biggest repent list out of anyone … and I'm going to hate it all." But despite that horrid thought, Stanley found some fun just startling the monster with fake jabs. "I'm not touching you! I'm not toughing you!"

Ford motioned Stanley to take it easy and confronted the Jersey Devil. "Well we seemed to be victorious over you, vile fiend."

"You have." The Jersey Devil slowly stood up. "You, out of any member of the Holy Mackerel, are the only one to think of using such a blessed object against me …. They were all just in it for your government's money."

Ford took out his journal. "Now how about we sit down while I ask you questions on your behavior, powers, and biology for my research?"

"What do you mean by biology?" The Jersey Devil gulped as Ford took notes on some question.

"So, Jersey, may I call you that? How did your body turn to a liquid form? Are your powers completely demonic? And are there others of your kind?"

In defeat, the Jersey Devil took a deep breath and answered the questions. "Yes you may call me that. I use black magic. Yes they are demonic. No, I'm the only kind, and I wasn't always a demon." Jersey looked away. "I am a thirteenth child of a woman, but of native born looooooong before the first humans of Europe came, which were Vikings. Have no idea where this Leeds family nonsense came from."

"There's a joke in there, but I'm above that … maybe." Stanley added as Ford was feeling greatly intrigued by this moment. He is finally interviewing the Jersey Devil.

Stanley also felt pride from this, mostly because he can practically force the Jersey Devil to do his bidding. " _Oh this is great!_ " Stanley thought to himself. " _I can make him do anything. Steal stuff, charge people for rides, make him do tricks, bite people I hate right in the face. The possibilities are endless."_ Stanley rubbed his hands. " _Heck, I can put on a show. 'Stanley and the Beast of Glass Shard Beach'! I'll make so much cash and bring in all the elderly ladies, like Carla …..Carla."_ A huge grin grew across Stanley's face. "I think I know how to properly introduce my true self without getting my butt handed to me."

With the cross tightly within his grasp, Stanley strolled along to the Jersey Devil as Ford checks his teeth.

"Yep, that's a cavity." Ford look to his smirk face brother and knew he was up to something. "Can I help you, Stanley Pines?"

Stanley looked at the Jersey Devil, fiddling his fingers. "Me, I just thought that the Jersey Devil may want to meet my dear old flame, Carla."

"Oh no."

 **End of Chapter**

 **Fq'p x obxi pxa axv tebk vlr xdobb lk pljbqefkd tfqe x abjlk.**

* * *

Sorry for that long month off. Other stories, as usual. Heck, this was going to be longer, but I decided to cut the rest of this chapter for the next one to save time and your patience.

Don't forget to check me out on deviantart. I have a journal entry with previews and info on my other fanfictions, including this one.

Oh, and Happy Halloween! … to those countries that actually celebrate it.


	61. A Pines Carol

**Chapter 61:** A Pines Carol

In a void of nothingness, our favorite Dream Demon, Bill Cipher, was enjoying the everlasting pleasure of relaxation, since there's nothing there to bother him, of course. Well not entirely; there is you.

"Well look-y here." Bill said in his robotic like voice as his single eye turns towards you. "If it isn't all the fans of Gravity Falls who were happy with the ending … this isn't going to end well for you." Bill tossed a beverage he was having off screen, which caused a nuclear explosion.

"Been a while, huh?" Bill held his arms up and tilted a bit. "Now I know what you're thinking. 'Should I see a doctor about this?' And the answer is of course not. You'll be fine." He tightened up his bow tie and gave his entire body a swirl.

"And your other question is if this is another non-canon Christmas Special on this fanfiction series, and the answer is yes. In fact, I am the same Bill Cipher from that 12 Days dimension that suffered a horrific fate. I wonder who, what, where, when, why, and how that happened?"

"It was me, sorry." Bill Cipher turned to see the culprit, Bill Cipher.

"Me!?" Bill gasped at himself. "How dare I?" He scolded himself like a child. "Why would I do such a thing?"

"I forget." Bill shrugged.

"Me too." Bill shrugged again as his other self-disappeared. "Any who, let's all eat the fried corpses of baby corn stalks as I tell you all the Gravity Falls version of 'The Christmas Carol'. Oh, but before that." Bill looked closely at the reader. "This is the very first time someone did a Gravity Falls Christmas Carol in the real world. If you so happen to look it up and find a few others; well sorry to you, you're in the Home Depot Dimension. The same place where bunnies are enslaved, root beer tastes like walnuts, and all off springs are hermit crabs, and it's all your fault!"

Bill pulled up his bow tie to create a screen.

"It all started in London on Christmas Eve during 1801, where our cranky old meat bag Stanley Scrooge was at his job at the Mystery Real Estate, also all forms of puppies will be eradicated by the year 1975. Don't you just love fun facts?"

* * *

Inside a frostbite causing snow covered building was ol' Stan Scrooge and his overwork and underpaid employee, Pine Tree.

"Ahhh, I love Christmas." Stan sighs as he counts his gold. "Just kidding!" he laughed as hugs his gold. "Bah humbug, all I need is green …. What the heck does 'Bah humbug' even mean?"

Pine Tree wasn't as miserably cheerful as his employer, he was freezing, and soon he would catch a horrific disease that will be checked by a doctor with the same sanitary sense as a delusional outdated human. "S-S-S-Scrooge, it's freeeeezing in here. Sh-Sh-Shouldn't S-S-Soooooos have my role?"

"That would be too predictable." Stan picked his ear. "At least you have hair on your head, you ungrateful underage kid I force to work faaaar passed the child labor law would allow!" Stan shouted as someone comes through the door.

"Hey-oooooooooh!" shouted Shooting Star Scrooge, Stan's great niece. If you're wondering why I'm not calling Stan by his symbol, it's because no one knows what that's called. Not even me. If you do know, then that means you're a Russian Clone that is racist towards Melipona Bees.

"How's my favorite uncle in the whole wide world who is also my only family member because my mum, who is also your sister, died. I'm dead inside." Shooting Star laughed as she hangs a reef on the door before exiting.

"Family, who needs 'em." Stan Scrooge stuck his tongue out like a disgusted child.

"A-Actually, Mr. Scrooge." Pine Tree spook with a shivered breath that smells like death, my favorite pastime for mortals, especially if they're going to leave behind a family, now that deserves an Emmy. "I-I achoo! I was thinking of …. Taking Christmas off … since I have a family."

Spoiler alert, his wife will die from the small pox, his daughter will start a boring sitcom, his other kid nobody cares about starts WW Negative 8, and Tiny Tim's is actually immortal, and boy does that get hilarious after all his loved ones are dead.

Before Stan could answer, there came in those two boys the author made up. Well not the chubby one, sort of.

"Hi, can we have milk money for the poor?" Beethoven said as he shakes a cup. "I tried beating up some kids to get it, but they end up beating _me_ up."

"Will you with a kinder heart help our cause, my fellow human being?" Dyami removed his hat and place it over his chest in sorrow. "Every night, I dream about those starved orphans. Their cry of hunger and their longing for a loving family fills my soul with unrest." He got on his knees. "We do not want to force a lot out of you, but from the bottom of your heart, will you please….?"

" **Dooooooooonate**." Dyami spoke in slow motion, which struck Stan's heart like an arrow, as in the 'Ahhhh, I've been hit, make my funeral expensive, clear my browser' kind of way.

"D-D-D-DONATE! AAAAAAAHHHHH!" Stan shouted in fear as he pulls a lever, causing a trap door to open up and swallow the two boys whole. "Eat, eat my sci-fi movie reference, eat!" Stan shouted as the boys cried out in horror as a horrifying roar echoes from the door.

Stan closed the door and rushed to his gold. "There there, the mean men are gone."

"This is getting disturbing." Pine Tree said as Stan kissed his money, catching a wonderful disease, a gold edition.

After shouting at Pine Tree, the shop closed up until the morning and the two headed on home.

"Well home sweet home." Stan said with a smile at his own place. "Now to open the door that is definitely not haunted." But as Stan reached for the door, the doorknob suddenly turned the form of someone long gone.

"Staaaaaan Scroooo-Rph Mmmm."

Stan paid no attention as he grabbed the knob and opened the door. "Hey maid that wasn't in the Mickey Mouse version, I'm home!"

"Ew, not you again." The maid came in who is none other than Pacifica Northwest …. I know what maid outfit you're fantasying this twelve year old is wearing. FYI, I already alerted the cops. "How was your super rich day?" She asked with not a care in the world.

"Ha, it's funny because you're family had to sell your mansion." Stan pointed out at the irritated girl as he ignores her question and walks upstairs for bed.

"Ah, bed. Everyone's favorite time of day; except for kids and their cellphones. Especially their laptops where they make up stories about characters they don't own. Boy, are they the biggest losers."

Stan crawled right into his bed, which is just a pile of cash. "Good night, money."

"Hey, Stan."

"What is it my cuddly cash?"

"Stanley, it's me, your …. Cuddly cash?"

"That's right. You're my precious love bird. Don't you ever leave me."

"Stan, wake up. I'm your old ….. what in Hirsch's name are you doing?!"

"I'm giving you a big kiss. Now pucker up."

"I must end this." The being took out a ray gun and zapped Stan Scrooge awake.

"You'll never take me alive, coppers!" shouted Stan as he looked at his attack, Sixfingers Marley. "M-Marley?" Stan rubbed his eyes to get a clear look at a spirit covered in chains. "Eeesh, thought I threw you overboard as a funeral."

"Yes …. Yes you did." Sixfingers pinched between his eyes. "Look, I have come to warn you. Three ghosts will visit you to show you your past, present, and future. Take their warning or you will end up just like wha-aaaaaaahhhh!" But again, Stan paid no attention as he sucks his old co-employer up in a vacuum.

"I can pay people to see this!" Stan grin widely as he fell back to sleep.

Some time had past in that cold night, enough for a mother spider to be completely devoured by her own children. As Stan was cozy in his pile of cash, he was unaware that it's the past shall haunt him once more, because it's Thursday …. Wait, that's my line? Why not throw in a meme while you're at it?

So after I removed the author's bones, another being entered Scrooge's bedroom.

"Scrooooooooooge …. Scroooooooooooge … Why I thinkin' it's a time you get your butt right out of bed!" the ghost spoke as he spits in a pot.

"Five more minutes, mommy."

"I'm a mother?! Well I be." He laughed as he pulled Stan right out of bed.

"What the, who the!" Stan jumped up to see the Ghost of Christmas Past, McGucket.

"Well howdy ho! I'm the Dead Guy of Thanksgiving Yesterday!"

"I would call the cops, but they'll end up arresting me." Stan tried to climbed back into bed, but McGucket pulled up him with surprising strength.

"Now no you don't. We are gonna fly to the past." He dragged him to the window and opened it to let the freezing air in. "Now fly, fly you fool, fly!" He laughed maniacally as he throws Scrooge into the air, only for him to fall to his death.

"Woops!"

 **End of Chapter**

 **.**

 **.**

 **.**

 **.**

Yeah I would love to end it here, but it will be more fun to torture him more ….. what, he killed me!

"Where am I?!" Stan shouted as he flies in the air. "Am I in heaven ….. how the heck did I made it?"

"Nope, we are going to pull back the alarm clock!" shouted McGucket as they fly to a Boarding School. "You see that?" McGucket pointed as they landed near a familiar looking boy.

"T-That's me." Stan said as he looked at his teenaged self.

"This here's the time you were sent to the apartment school because yer dad didn't want to see yer face." McGucket laughed, as Stan frowned from flashbacks. "My son doesn't want to see me, either."

"If reminding me of how much I want to punch my dad is your plan of making me ch-ch-charitable ACK-OOH!" Stan started coughing like he was about to drop dead. "Do I need to explain more?"

"Nope!" McGucket wrapped his horrifying smelling arms around Stan as he points at someone coming. "Look-y here."

Stan eyes widen when he sees his long dead sister, Kimmy. Yep, another made up character. But this one has a sad story. Isn't that original?

"Brother." Kimmy caught the attention of the sadden Stan Scrooge. "I-" Then she got hit by a bus.

"Grown up time!" McGucket shouted as he takes the shell-shocked Stan to the future of his first employment, Corduroy Lumber.

The two pierced through the window to see the owner of the business, Manly Dan, punching everyone senseless. "I love violence!"

Stan let out a soft laugh. "Boy was he a hoot, and then there's me." Stan looked at his younger and timid self. "Out in the real world all by my lonesome."

"Not for long." McGucket pointed at a woman as Stan gasped.

"Oh no!" Stan shouted as Lazy Eye Susan walked up to him.

"Mind having this dance, handsome." She winked the best she could at the blushing man.

"S-S-Sure." Stan took her hand and led her to the dancefloor. But his nervous heart caused his palms to form sweat, which was not good when he started twirling her around.

"Waaaaaaah!" She slipped from his hands and landed in the furnace, which she jumped out and ran around the flammable decoration, catching the whole place on fire and killing plenty of people in under the time of completing a house of cards … you remember that this is _my_ story, right?

"Well my work here is done." McGucket laughed as Stan again was caught in flashbacks of the horrid past. "I'll be in your nightmares." McGucket laughed away as Stan returned to his bedroom, where the Ghost of Christmas Past was passing time with a magazine.

"Oh, hey dude." Question Mark, the Ghost of Chirstmas Past, threw the magazine in the fire place. "You ready to see your present? Well technically this is your present, right now. So I'll be taking you to here. Even though we are already here and stuff."

Question Mark rubbed his neck as Stan just stood there motionless.

"Maybe I should take you to your niece. Yeah, other people's presents would be better."

Stan said nothing.

"Hello?" Question Mark waved his hand in front of Stan, no response. "I guess I'll just carry you, if that's O.K." Stan said nothing against it, so Question Mark went along and brought him to Shooting Star's place. "Daw, look at this happy go lucky girl with no mom … wait, where is my mom?"

Inside, Shooting Star was laughing with her guest as they held a toast (the bread kind of toast) to Stan Scrooge for some reason.

"See, even nice people can tolerate mean people …. Sometimes."

Not a single muscle moved on Stan's face.

"Guess a tear jerker will do." Question Mark carried him all the way to his overworked employee's house, where they were having their dinner of a single potato chip.

'This flippin stinks!" shouted the wife of Pinetree, Ice Bag. "Dude, you work too much with too low pay, I say we go straight to Scrooge's place and prank him, with ghosts or something."

"Icebag." Pinetree said calmly. "You know that this time period doesn't have resumes or the internet. I can't find a job anyway else … and I already tried to go on strike."

"Well he has enough to feed that monster." Ice Bag pointed the children. "We have mouths to feed."

"Yes, I am hungry." Candy said, with a smile.

"Give me food, now!" demanded Grenda as she slams the table.

But then there was the third and sick child, Gideon.

"Yeeeesss ….. starve ….. ignore my stash and starve." Gideon smiled to himself as he quietly eats a slice of ham. "Die and I'll inherit ….. at least something other than that pet rock you gave me."

Noticing Gideon, Stan started up again and laughed. "It's funny because he's going to die at the end …. Right?"

"Nope." Question Mark confirmed.

"Darn it!" Stan shouted as he folds his arm. "All I wanted was …. Wait, where am I?" Stan turned to Question Mark, but he was nowhere to be seen now.

"Hey old fart with bad speech, where'd you ran off to? And why am I standing at my punching bag's house …. He's married to her?! How'd he catch that?"

This is a fanfiction. That's why. Oops, did I ruin the magic for you? GOOD! I enjoy seeing people suffer. In fact, I have a great idea. Hey Grim Reaper!

"Yes?" The Grim Reaper showed up. "Is this the part where I show Stan his grave and-"

And then I vaporized him and take his place. Now burn, Scrooge! BUUUUUUURN! Bill Cipher grabbed Stan Scrooge and shoved him down a fiery grave of brimstone.

"Alright, I'll change my ways, sheesh!" Stan shouted as Bill let him out. "I mean all you have to do is bribe me." Stan brushed himself off as he returned to his home.

"Well, time to act like I lost my mind." Stan opened up the window on the bright Christmas Day and saw a boy walking along. "Hey, Kid!"

"Who me?" Thompson looked up at the old man.

"Go hunt down a Tyrannosaurus Rex for me! I guess they're birds now."

"M-M-Me?!" Thompson asked, but noticed his friends cheering him on. "I'll do anything!"

"Heh, he's going to have some issues later on in life." Stan smiled as he rushes down the steps to see his maid, Pacifica.

"Hey kid! Here's fanart of you and Dipper kissing!" Stan handed her the drawing as she gasped.

"My nose isn't that big!"

Stan grinned as he leaped out the door and headed to his place of business. "Now to grab my cash and-"

But from out of the trap door came Beethoven carrying a beaten Dyami.

"B-B-Beethoven." Dyami coughed as Beethoven looked horrified. "I-I failed."

"Don't say that!" he shook his dear friend. "I need you so I can look cool!"

"I am sorry …. But my time is up, blah." Dyami stuck his tongue out and dropped his head.

"Nooooooooo! He's dead!"

"Ya know, I don't want evidence." And so Stan pushed the two back to the trap door, as he hears the screams and roar yet again.

"This isn't canon, so who cares." Stan closed the door and whistled away.

Later that night, he arrived at his great niece house for dinner ….but earlier that day; he barged right to his employee's home.

"Hey Pine Tree!"

BAM!

Stan was met with a fist from Ice Bag. Dang, Red is good.

"Break in again, I dare ya!" shouted the red head her kids hide behind her.

"M-Mr. Scrooge!" Pine Tree shouted as he helps Stan up. "I am so sorry!"

"Well you should be, because you're getting a promotion as partner!" Stan shouted with joy, surprising Pine Tree.

"Are-Are you sure?"

"Yes I am, I became humble and money giving because four dead people came to me in my sleep and then we time traveled to experience traumatizing moments. Merry Christmas!"

Pine Tree and Ice Bag looked at each other and huddled.

"I think he finally lost it from that left hook of yours." Pine Tree told his wife. "Do not, under any circumstances, tell the nut house."

Ice Bag zipped her smiling lips and threw away the slider head, literally!

And so they enjoyed a wonderful Christmas together, and Gideon did not die.

 **The End**

But then I blew up that dimension as well. Ha!

 **There is no cipher to solve.**


	62. Another Shot

**Chapter 62:** Another Shot

Back at what's left of the concert (and I am not just talking about the Devil's incident), Carla was talking to some teens about the good book, well trying to.

"Children, you are living a life of sin. Your souls will be healed if … if you just look away from those darn computer phones."

She sighed from the teens' lack of attention. She even waved her hands in front of them, but received not a single glance.

"You know you can get a free …. App thing of the good book there ….. with voice overs ….. anyone?" With her weary head down, she slop right to a chair and let the sadness of your life sink in. "Perhaps I just don't have it in myself anymore."

"Or just stop talking about fairy tales then." Out of her dumb luck, one single teen managed to lift his head up and paid attention to her. "I go full evolution."

"Oh really?" She placed her fist on her hips. "If you're so devoted to evolution, tell me how evolution works then."

"… Fighting other animals …. and magic stones … and being traded for another pet."

"This is truly the last generation." Carla sigh in defeat and went right back to her depressed state of mind.

From the forest, our heroes and enslaved villain had just seen the current state of her life.

"And that's my plan to win back that beautiful angel. See how miserable she is without a wrinkled arm wrapped around her?" Stanley said to Jersey. "You understand?"

"The plan, yes." Jersey spoke with his unenthusiastic tone. "Why, I do not." He turned his head to the scam artist. "You do realize that you must win her through truth and bonds."

"And that's coming from this horse dragon thing, man." Love God walked up to them, with his past beating still visible on this face. "I usually let the internet do my job."

"That explains a lot." Jersey said under his breath.

But despite his injured face, Love God still managed to look wise to Stanley. "But you don't need some lame stunt to impress her. You just need to show her your HEART!"

"Ow, that was right in my ear!" Stanley rubbed his ear as Jersey looked just as irritated.

"And what do you know about such things?" Jersey said to Love God with judging eyes. "You just throw your potions at humans and they instantly fall for each other? You call that growth?" Jersey snickered. "That's no better than that song I taught some band that appeals to these types of humans." Jersey gestured to the delinquent kids. "And yet it has a hidden message unlike your straight up un-willful powers."

"Ya know, that kind of sounds really messed up when I think about it." Stanley admitted, but then something crossed his mind. "Wait a minute, what kind of song? Does it involve bowling and record players?"

"At least you still have morals." Stanford said, looking unpleased at his brother glaring at the frighten demon. "She broke up with you, remember. She would want someone more mannered than you."

"Oh sure you'll say that!" Stanley turned to his brother. "Trust me; you don't have as much of a chance as I do, unless you get that giant fish monster to do some stunt, than be my guest." Stanley gave his brother a confident smile. "That is if I don't sweep her off her feet first!" Stanley held up the cross, which startled the demon. "Now let's go, Jersey!"

"A-As you wish." The Jersey Devil shivered as he followed suit, leaving behind Ford and Love God.

"….. So." Stanford moved his fingers in hesitation. "Any luck with me and Carla?"

"No way, dude! I'm not telling you guys anything else." Love God shook his head. "You two remind me of those annoying kids from the Woodstick Festival." Love God marched away, leaving a confused Ford alone.

"Well I guess I would have to fix everything when Stan's plan fails … I wonder if Leviathan's close by." Stanford felt his chest. "Maybe some light might catch …. Wait, what's this?" Stanford then pulls out a necklace with a blue gem. "Now where did I …. Oh right!"

Stanford recalled the time he and his brother explore Leviathan's old temple and came across the note left by someone who spoke with the beast, helped Mermando find them, and wanted his help.

He took out the note and read it over.

"Party, agreeing with Levi on things, weird angry voice, aha!" Stanford read the instructions on how to use the necklace for communication.

"So I just need to heat it with a non-microwavable source …. Stanley would use a microwave." Ford tucked the necklace back to his coat pocket and look ahead. "I don't know who this person is, but I should really check on my brother first."

Elsewhere, Love God was walking through the woods and kicked an empty can. "What a bummer, man." He kicked the can right into the tree, which just disturbed an owl that straight up attacks him. After some screaming, Love God managed to make the Owl fall in love with a mouse who together will have horrific sinning-against-the-food-chain offspring.

"I miss my old job! At least there was cotton candy up there for free." He fell down on his knees and cried out into the dark night. "What must I do to be hired back?"

Then, from the moon-lit sky, a beam of light shined down on him. "Wait, is this ….." Then an asteroid landed right on his face.

"Mmmm. Hhhrrr. Mmmmm." He pushed the space rock off and rubbed his face. "Do I need to write songs on asteroids? Everyone does that!" After rubbing his nose, he noticed a letter attached to the rock. "What's this?" He picked it up and read the content. "From the Big Guy himself?! …. Uhuh …. Yeah sure, I'll pass the message. Whatever." Still not looking hopeful, he stuck the letter in his pocket and turned around.

Back at the concert, Stan and Jersey were just about ready to pull off the biggest scam to win a heart of Carla.

"You ready?" Stanley asked the monster.

"Why yes I am ready to humiliate myself against my very own will." Jersey answered with a sigh. "But despite my depressed state, I must still hold onto life even when I am trapped by a human who's only goal is to win a false sense of love from a failed chance that he caused himself."

"… Pretty depressing there, but I don't care right now!" Stanley smiled as he pushed Jersey. "Now be the best monster you can be!"

"I know you don't really mean that." Jersey said with a sigh, but continued forth.

"Rwa….." Jersey gave an attempted roar to intimidate the teens and Carla, but none had noticed.

"More emotion!" Stanley loudly whispered. "And breath fire, fire is good."

Jersey took a deep breath, and then spit fire into the sky.

This caught the attention of Carla who gasped, but not the teens.

"Rrrrrr! Would you just …. Look here!" Jersey swiped a phone off a teen, who angrily shouted with bleeped out words and protesting-sounding phrases he got from the internet.

"Fear me! I shall end your lives here and now!" Jersey said as he rose up a paw to strike, but then from the woods came Stanley Pines with fireworks going off behind him.

"Demon, be gone and leaves these kids with no future be!" Stanley heroically shouted, with the fireworks catching the forest on fire.

"Wait wait, stop!" Jersey shouted as he dashed away.

"Hey, HEY! Where are you-"

Jersey Devil came back with a comically giant fire extinguisher and quickly put the flames out before they could spread.

"…. This is MY territory, no matter how utterly terrible it is." Jersey said as he turned his attention back at the teen who was still ranting. "Ahem, absolutely not you super buff …. I can't believe I'm saying this, young-old man who saved the entire world from some …. Cyclops thing …. And also feed the orphanage."

"Yes I did all those things with my hands tied, my eyes covered, and my legs cut off ….. they grew back." He posed like a martial artist he saw on T.V. and shouted again. "Now feel the left lung of justice system!"

With a sigh and his wings ready, Jersey pushed himself away when Stanley landed a blow. "Ahhhhhh…." Jersey yelled with no effort as he collides with a tent. "What powerful ….. D-Disgusting! Not in here you brats!"

"Hey!" A male and female punk ran out. "We were just eating fried cupcakes!"

"Those things are garbage! Garbage!" Jersey shouted as the teens ran off. "Children these days."

"Fried cupcakes? That sounds deli- I mean evil! Evil like … setting some trees on fire!" Stanley shouted, with the burnt remains of branches behind him. "Now taste lawsuit!" Stanley delivered a kick to the devil, which he responds as if an anvil landed on him.

"Hey, hey! You were supposed to fling yourself into that tree!" Stan angrily whispered.

"My apologies." Jersey said as he flies himself into the tree. "Ow, how dare you."

Stanley laughed as he clenched his fist. "Now to send you back to hell where have to explain to your boss how you been beaten by the greatest adventurer of all time!"

"Technically the devil doesn't run the bad place. He's just stuck on this rock until the end times." Jersey Devil quickly explained. "Also he never lost his angelic look, that goat creature you've seen images of is in fact an Under-angel named Keith."

* * *

 **Meanwhile in the Bad Place**

The muscular devil-looking guy named Keith was crying to himself. "I'm not the bad guy! I have a loving wife and three beautiful children. And I own a wonderful garden! Why does the Devil make up lies about me, why?!"

"I don't know and I don't care, I have more bloody things to worry about." Bloody Mary said, trying her best to ignore Keith.

* * *

"Sorry, wasn't listening." Stan said as he readies his hand. "Fist of the Loophole in the Law!" Stanley shouted as he threw the finishing blow to the beast of New Jersey.

However, another presence made themselves known to the two in the climax of their epic showdown.

"Alright, I have just about enough of this! Jersey and Stan!"

The two looked to see Carla herself shouting at them like an angry mother. "Tell me what is going on!"

Jersey stood up and answered the woman. "This man threatened me with a cross to do this pathetic show for you."

"Me!?" Stan shouted. "Look, this is not what it ….. uhhhh, what did you just call me?" Stan asked with sweat running down like horses on a race tracks.

"Stan, as in Stan Pines." Carla folded her arms. "I would call you, Steve Pinnington, but I think I may be too smart for you …. Especially when you pull that 'fake death' trick five times already." She held one hand up. "At least the last one was convincing enough for everyone in town, including your own parents."

Stan lowered his head in defeat and removed his disguise. "Just as quick as ever." He looked up to the woman of his dreams. "So you want to know what's all this …. Wait." He pointed at the horse monster. "You know each other, are you dating?!"

The two just the man the most oddest look he had ever seen.

"… I wanted to win you back."

Carla shook her head. "My father was also part of Holy Mackerel Order."

"She always attends 'Take your Child to Work' day during her earlier years." Jersey answered. "But not anymore after she has grown to an adult and her father perished, from natural causes, unlike how I usually handle your members." Jersey snickered as Carla snarled at him lightly. "But we meet up every time these events happen." Jersey gestured to the teens. "I lure them, she leads them away-"

"But they end up ignoring both of us." Carla folded her arms.

"Wow, you're both losers." Stanley said, and then realizing he called that to Carla. "You can punch me now."

"If I was young enough." She scratched her head as her anger seems to settle down. "Though, there was something I needed to say about …. When I left you for that ….. low life."

"Take me back!" shouted Carla's old flame. "I got fried cupcakes."

"He'll be dead in an hour." Jersey said. "This man threatened me to co-operate after a little struggle we had."

"Threaten you say." Carla raised an eyebrow at the Devil. "Stan, I'm at least impressed that you managed to find a way to have the devil bow at your feet."

"Well let's just say I have thirty years of experience where I was staying at." Stanley smiled at his own pride.

"And where might that be?" Jersey gave him a curious stare. "When we met, you seem experienced when you confronted me ….. too experienced."

"Ahem." Stanley smiled as he held up the cross. "Remember this, bub?"

Jersey looked away at the cross as Carla smiled in aww.

"Amazing, so that's how you did it." She smiled with joy. "What's even more fascinating is that you managed to figure out how to activate the holy armor from a cross."

"What can I say?" He smiled, feeling his heart warming up. "I survived on the street after …. Armor what now!?" Stan shouted as he looked at the wooden cross. "I thought these small logs of wood was just for decoration and demon repellent!" He then had a stroke of genius. "I can make money out of this and … oh boy."

Stan slowly turn towards the Jersey Devil, who was now standing straight up with his ears facing towards the old man and his paws clenching the soil in an uncontrolled manor.

"Oh Stan…." With his neck cracking, the Jersey Devil looked at the man with bloodstained eyes. "Mind repeating your little revelations?"

Laughing nervously, Stanley stepped back as the demon marched right towards him. "You see, I have a very logical explana-THINK FAST!" Stan tossed the cross to Carla. "Carla, now!"

Jersey turned to Carla with wide eyes as the old woman held onto the cross.

"I'm too old to do it."

"…. Huh?" Stan asked.

"It takes a lot of energy and I'm close to 70." She said. "But Jersey Devil listen to me!" Carla turned to the Devil in plea. "Let him live, please!" She called out in distress.

"Please?" Jersey smiled. "I've been humiliated by this man and his brother holds something that belongs to me. Do you really think I'll let this slide?"

Stan tried to run, but the monster dashed in front of him. "I smell your sins, Stanley Pines." Jersey licked his lips as he walked towards Stan. "You disobey your government, steal, call people fools, and …" Jersey sniffed Stan and then turned away in disgust. "Magazines, really?"

Carla glared at Stan who could only hold his arms up and smile sheepishly. "Wait, calling people fools?"

"That's a sin." Carla explained. "Which also includes stupid, idiot, and moron."

"…. How do you people survive?"

"I have no idea." She answered.

Jersey Devil grinned devilishly (no pun intended) at Stan. "Before I sent you to the fiery pits, I just want to know about where you've been." He scratches the ground. "Because I have a gut feeling I may know the place."

"Not on my watch!" Ford Pines ran in, with the lantern. "Hand over my brother, now!"

The Jersey Devil smiled. "And why would I? Remember our last fight?"

Ford closed his eyes and held out the lantern. "Leave my brother alone, and you can have this."

With lit eyes, the Jersey Devil moved closely with caution. He examined the lantern and smiled. "See, doesn't this sound more simple?" Jersey took the lantern and walked away. "I suggest you leave, you don't want to see what will come to these teenagers."

Ford dragged Stan and Carla away from the scene.

"But before that-" Jersey melted and moved towards Carla, capturing her with his formed arms.

"Carla!" the twins shouted as Jersey formed. "I let your brother go, you said nothing about her."

"Give her back you mule!" shouted Stanley as Jersey laughed.

"I'll let her live, if you answer this." Jersey tightened his grip on Carla. "Why were you so trained? Where have you been?"

There was no way out of this. Ford took a breath and hoped for the best. "Gravity Falls."

Jersey smiled. "I knew it." Still holding onto Carla, Jersey asked another question. "I haven't been there for about three years was it?" Jersey asked himself. "How such a land can possibly exist, don't you say?" He smiled with his tongue flicking like a snake. "It's like a magnet for the world's strangest? Animals, magic, artifacts, curses, aliens … I'd noticed the cliff sides." Jersey spread his wings. "It has so many, and great beauty in nature. Why such a land was never claimed?"

Ford and Stan watched every move of the demon as he holds Carla hostage, and close attention to Jersey's words.

"I could have ruled over that land instead of this waste." He held up a paw and casted a dark fire. "A land with countless creatures at my command and a small town with the most idiotic people to manipulate; who wouldn't want such a role?"

The twins' blood boiled at the thought of their homes at the hands of another demon.

"But alas, that is just a dead dream." The Jersey Devil said with a hint of his usual low esteem. "The weather was just too much for me."

"The rain?" Stanley asked as Ford shrugged. "Well what d'ya expect from Oregon?"

The Jersey Devil smiled. "Well enough about that, I must be grateful for what I have now." The New Jersey Devil released Carla and flew up on the stage.

"Carla!" Both Stans helped out the old woman up as the demon spoke up to the teens.

"Humans!"

Every single teen ignored him.

"…. Want to film something embarrassing so you will feel better about your miserable life?" Jersey asked with a fake smile.

The teens gasped in joy as they all turned their phones towards the winged horse holding the lantern.

"Now then…." The Jersey Devil used his dark magic to light a dark flame inside the lantern. "Feast your eyes!"

"No!" Carla shouted as the Pines stopped her. "We have to stop him!"

"Already on it." Stanley and Carla turned to Ford with a remote. "I didn't just give him the lantern." With a sneaky grin that matches perfectly with his brother's, Ford pressed the big red button.

On the lantern, a small red light was beginning to flash.

"Your souls belong to me!" shouted the monster as the lantern appears to be sucking in the very dark of the night itself.

"It's just a little something I carry with me." Ford said to Carla in a flirtatious way, well his level of flirting anyway. "Once the beeping accelerates, it will designate thus destroying both the lantern and the Jersey-"

"The heck is this?" Ford eyes widened as Jersey noticed the small device and pluck it right out, only to then realize it's a bomb. Acting quickly, he melted his hand, absorb the bomb, and shot it like a spitball into the air as it explodes.

Jersey slowly tranced his glance to Ford, giving him the 'Nice Try' look as Ford looked sheepishly at a judging Carla.

"Now as I was saying." The Jersey Devil held the lantern up as all the teens eyes began to glow. "I call upon both day and night, to accomplish my destiny and to deliver fright!"

The lantern gave off a dark aura as the teens lifted up into the air.

"For I am weak, in this world of dark, I shall overcome and leave my mark."

As the teens hung in the air, Stan shook Carla, asking for any help at all. "He's casting some mediocre poem to eat these rotten kids' souls ….wait, is that really bad?"

"Bad for what the Jersey Devil wishes to accomplish." Carla says as she skims through the good book. "Sometimes I just wish they have a 'Do's and Don't' list somewhere instead of over two thousand pages of stories!"

Jersey smirked at the sight of the helpless heroes as a white aura appeared from the teens mouths. "Now feed the lantern, with a human soul, so that I may grow and devour my true foe! ….. That didn't rhyme."

But the spell have been cast, the spirit of the souls were sucked right into the lantern as the lifeless bodies dropped to the ground. "Yes …. YES!" Jersey held the full lantern of souls to his chest. "Now to test my body with the powers of these souls. And then ….. I may even surpass what caused my failure!"

The Jersey Devil gave a horrific laugh into the night sky, but sadly his inspiration of Squidward still hangs on his life.

The lantern started to shake and gave off a red aura.

"Ow, ow, OW!" Jersey released the hot lantern and blew on his fingers. The top of the shaking lantern opened up and all the souls escaped and entered back to their original bodies, while also giving that throwing up sound effect for no reason.

"H-Huh?" All the teens awoke with pounding headaches.

"Oooooow, my head." One teen said. "W-What is that?" One by one, the kids noticed the Jersey Devil with a mixed expression of dumbfounded shock.

"Is that ….. the devil!?" They all screamed in fear.

* * *

"They'll say the same thing to me if they see this ugly face of mine!" Keith cried out. "I don't leaven know why I look like a demon."

"Still here and I must say I still don't care." Bloody Mary said. "But really, not a single drop of Bloody Mary?"

* * *

"This is punishment for disobeying our parents and doing unhealthy things because we thought it was cool!"

"Quick, to our homes to finish chores!"

They all scattered away, leaving nothing but their garbage.

"Wait, we should clean up too!" One teen caught the attention of all as they returned to pick up their things and ran off.

"… What just happened?" Jersey Devil looked at the lantern. He waved his paw over it to check the heat and carefully picked it up. "Now let's see what went wrong."

As he examined the lantern, the elder Pines twins whispered to each other. "Now's our chance to flee." Ford spoke to Stan and Carla.

"Wait, I think I have some holy water at my stand." Carla said, "He's allergic to that stuff."

As they quietly search, the Jersey Devil took noticed of the bars. "Now let me see, what did that cold-blooded canary say about this?" Jersey thought and thought and recalled a memory. "Yes, now I remember. This lantern's taste in souls is very picky." He grinned at the dying flame. "Only a strong soul with great experience can be used, but will also grant the user immense power."

"Why do I have a strange feeling that we and our loved ones have good enough souls?" Stanley asked himself as Carla found the holy water.

"Just one bottle left." She handed it to Ford. "Just a small sprinkle will cause him to puff up."

Jersey Devil smiled. "A strong soul. That sound about fitting for… YOU!" Jersey Devil pointed, to a toad.

"Ribbit."

"…..YOU!" He turned his paw to the three adults. "And as a demon, I don't make promises!" He flew towards the three, but backed off when Ford threw drops of holy water.

"So you actually have something useful against me." He smiled. "But what a few drops against a raging flame?" He blew fire around the three adults, cutting off their escape.

"Oh sure, me starting an uncontrollable environmental damaging fire is a big no no. Unless you do it, it's perfectly fine. Stanley said as they stood close.

"Now just one small fireball should hurt you enough to survive." As Jersey inhaled, Ford took this moment to throw the bottle towards his mouth.

"Yes…" Ford quietly cheered for his perfect shot, but then something dropped between them and blocked the bottle.

"What the-" shouted everyone, even the Jersey Devil.

"This night just isn't our night." Stanley said as three figured stood before them.

"What is this?" Jersey asked as the three figures came into focus. "Oh for the love of." Jersey slapped himself in the face as two humans appear; one man and the other a woman.

" _Prepare for trouble_!" spoke the woman, in a singing voice.

" _And make it double_." The man sang along with the woman.

" _To protect the world from devastation_!"

" _To unite all people within our nation_!"

" _To denounce the evils of truth and love!_ "

" _To extend our reach to the stars above!"_

"What is going on here?!" Stanley shouted as the annoyed look on Jersey could tell he knows the creeps.

" _Jenny!_ "

" _Jake_! _"_

" _Team Freemasons-_ "

"Oh not these guys again!" shouted Stanley.

"- _blast off at the speed of light._ "

" _Surrender now, or prepare to fight_."

Then there was a cat, just licking itself.

After a couple of second just staring at the awkward moment, the Jersey Devil yawned and then blew fire on them. After watching the two people jumping into the beach as the cat just continues to lick itself, Jersey cleared a path through the fire and picked up Stanley. "I'm just going to go suck your sinful soul and go straight to bed."

"Stanley!" shouted Ford and Carla as the demon lifted Stan up into the air.

"But first, I think I need to you to pay me."

"Pay you what?!" shouted Stanley. "You're not getting a penny off me! I'll actually fight you to the death for a penny!"

Jersey Devil shook his head. "All I need is ….. an _arm_ and a _leg_!" The Jersey Devil opened up his mouth to rip off Stanley's arm, but then another annoyance came.

"JERSEY DEVIL!"

"Oh great." Jersey Devil looked with pure anger at Love God, along with everyone else.

"I think I like my arm eaten rather than smell this guy again." Stan said as Love God hold up a message.

"Behold, a letter from the Big Guy!" Love God held up a letter written in golden ink.

"The Big Guy?" Jersey tilted his head. "Don't you mean Go-"

"Oh sorry, the mouse won't let me say his name."

"M-Mouse?!" Jersey Devil asked. "What does a rodent ….. but we say your name out loud, Love God! How is that different?"

"Hey, I'm just delivering the message here." He held his arm up. "I just want to eat candy and sing."

Jersey flew down, dropped Stan, and read the letter.

" _After going through the harm of his mind, I hear by declare that Stanley Pines get a free …. ACCESS TO HEAVEN!?"_

"WHAT!?" They all shouted, mostly Stanley.

"For what?!" Jersey shouted as he continued reading. "Uhuh, yes … interesting … No demon shall harm…... Stanley Pines, the one who had deceived and defeated Bill Cipher." Jersey nodded his head. "So it looks like your soul is safe. Darn it." Jersey Devil turned to Stanley. "Well look at that. Despite this humiliating attempt at love, you just have to get a free pass for defeating the evil and dangerous Bill Ci-Ci-Ci-Ciiiaaaaaaah!?" Jersey's eyes bulge open as he pick up Stan again. "You ….. B-B-Bill, beat!?"

"Hey, take it easy on the Hawaiian shirt." Jersey let him go to brush himself off. "And yes, I got Bill into my mind and erased him."

"But-But" Jersey looked over the letter. "This … this a genuine message." Jersey sat down to settle his mind on the pure shock.

"Who's Bill?" asked Love God, who only received a glare from Jersey.

"I guess another reason why you were cast down from grace." Jersey shook his head. "Bill is the most feared entity in all multiverse."

"Hey, how do you know that?" Ford asked; which caught the devil's attention.

"You know, I did sense a strange disturbance over in the west." Jersey looked at Ford straight into the eyes. "Has Bill entered this physical world over at Gravity Falls?"

"Y-Yes." Ford answered. "But with a mind erasing machine, we followed my brother's plan to trick him into entering his mind."

"And it was so satisfying hilarious!" laughed Stan. "I punched him in my boxers."

"…So, looks like I wasn't needed at all."

The Stans wondered at what Jersey just said.

"What do you mean by that?" Ford asked.

"Sounds like what that letter said about Levi over at Atlantis." Stanley mentioned.

"Levi, Atlantis?" Jersey turned his head back at the twins. "Is the Leviathan free already?"

"Wait, you know about the Leviathan too?" Ford asked as Jersey dig in the soil with his paws. "How do you know this? Were you a part of Plan B?"

But without warning, the Jersey Devil slashed at Ford's coat.

"Bro!" Stanley shouted as Ford fell back, unharmed.

"What do I know? What about you!?" The Jersey Devil shouted. "Did Gravity Falls change at all? Have you met the others?" He held up his paw, but noticed something stuck in his fingers. "And what's this?"

Ford gasped at what the Devil has. "The necklace." Ford checked his destroyed pocket as the demon examined the jewelry.

"And I guess Leviathan likes you now. Why else would he give you this?" He held the necklace up, and then shattered the gemstone. "He may control the waters ….." He spread his wings and gave off a dark aura. "But the land and sky shall bring no haven." But before he attacked, he looked back at Love God.

"Wait, is he protected as well?"

Love God looked over the letter. "No, just that guy."

"What?!" Ford shouted. "But he's a crook! I on the other hand dedicated my life to my works and studies, such as… the very machine that brought Bill to the physical world in the … first place."

"And now a perfect reason to send you to your eternal punishment." He held his paws right up. "Say hi to Bloody Mary for me."

* * *

"Oh how much are you gonna blubber?" Mary shouted at Keith. "And right now I'm very confused at what that yellow thing was that stolen my drink before."

"From what I'm hearing now, it was definitely not a pyramid." shouted Keith. "Or could have been, I dunno."

* * *

But as he was about to land a fatal blow, something grabbed his paw. "Three, three times the charm!" the annoyed demon shouted. But the devil gave the new stranger a good look and gasped. "Oh no."

With absolutely no possible way at predicting what the next interruption is, here is some ridiculous over-the-top anime looking robot-thing that held tightly onto the Devil's paw. The monster screamed in fear as the robot began slamming him to the ground and punched him right in the face. Then the robot began to stomp on the demon like a bug, causing the monster to turn to his liquid form.

"Uuuuuuuhhhhh." Jersey's head formed, only to collapse on the ground.

"So who's this weirdo?" Stanley asked a bright light appeared on the robot, revealing it to be Carla's own daughter. "I mean wonderful hero of ours!"

"Mom!" Carla's daughter shouted as she runs to her mother. "Are you alright!?"

"Of course I am." She smiled softly as he turned to the puddle that was Jersey. "He wasn't going to kill me anyways, we're practically frenemies." She looked over at the puddle to see Jersey's head forming.

"And thanks for not killing him."

"Eh, I've seen worse." The daughter said with a sigh. "Especially in this state."

"Seriously, why the bad rap?" Stanley asked.

Stanford kneeled down to the beaten demon and smiled. "So from what Carla spoke of, I'm guessing Jersey is safe….er."

Jersey managed to form one paw to reach out. "Yes… But ….. but I shall …. Be victorious ….. one day …" He tried reaching for the lantern, but Stanley swiped it.

"Come and get, get it!" Stan smiled as he played around with Jersey trying his very best to reach it.

"Give me that!" Ford took the lantern and put it in his torn coat. "Now as I was asking before, what can you tell me about Leviathan and that necklace?"

Jersey was about to speak, but his head quickly melted away, leaving only a puddle of darkness.

"Is he ….." Ford stood up as Carla looked at Jersey.

"He's weakened, but not dead." She smiled. "He has been around far longer than us, who knows what he'd been up to." She turned to the brothers with a sad look. "But I fear he will not recover soon, nor reveal anything." She shook her head. "It's hard to track him down, too, and I recall that you're on a time schedule." She smiled softly. "But perhaps I can help with something."

"Really?" Ford asked. "Beautiful maiden, what do you know about-"

"But please, none of that." She held her hand up. "I am sorry, you are an interesting man, but-" That 'but' was enough to shatter Ford's heart, but he wasn't really that surprised. "I belong here with those miserable kids. And you belong in Gravity Falls ….. with other strange things I don't want to get involved with." She pointed at the now puddle form of Jersey. "Despite our failures, he's still a handful."

"YES!" Stanley shouted in victory. "In your face, Ford!"

"I'm not taking you back in a longshot!" Carla scolded the more wild brother. "In fact, I'm not taking anyone." She shook her head in a fit. "I'm near 70, my brother's been like a father to my daughter."

"I have a name you know."

"And I've been pretty good after that hippie left me. Not amazing, but good in my eyes." She took a deep breath. "But I have no hard feeling for either of you … some for you, Stanley, not as much as you guess."

The brothers looked awkwardly at one another.

"I'm sorry I'm not the one for you, but maybe you are the ones for some other people." She turned to Love God. "You delivered the message to the Big Guy himself, can you help these two?"

The Pines Twins looked at Love God with hope, but sadly for them, he did not look like he was in the mood.

"Sorry, but I've spent waaaaay too much time here getting my butt handed to me!" He waved his arms and marched out. "Just go online."

"I am not using that without supervision ever again!" Stanley shouted as Love God left the scene. "Well I guess it's bros before women again." He smiled and held his arms out. "Awkward Sibling Hug?"

"What?"

"It's something I picked up from the kids." Stan moved his fingers to welcome him. The old scientist shrugged and hugged his brother.

"Pat pat." Stanley said as he pat his brother's back as Ford followed.

"Well that was heart warmly stupid." Stan said as they broke apart. "So anyway, Carla. Mind making my brother's noggin even bigger?"

"It's the least I can do." She smiled. "I don't know anything about Leviathan. All this time I thought he was only a metaphor." She held onto her hands. "But I did hear a bit about Gravity Falls and why he wasn't able to rule over it." She took a deep breath. "A couple years ago, he moved to those lands to in an attempt to control, but something was always there to meddle in his plans, a force of good." She tilted her head and smiled. "A hero by the name of Whimsical Wind."

"Whimsical Wind?" Ford asked. "What is …. Heh, heh, O.K., what kind of ridiculous name is that?"

"Whimsical Wind, oh bother!" Stan slapped his face. "Thought I heard the last of that guy."

"You know this Wind?" Ford raised an eyebrow.

"He was some superhero or something." Stan answered. "Big pain in the butt when you're a con-artist and a crook."

"So glad I left you." Carla said under her breath.

"Been in the crime fighting business for a while, but eventually he started slowing down." Stan motioned his hand around. "Then a couple years ago, he just stopped showing up. Left the city in charge of those two clowns." Stan smiled. "I guess he needed an actual job to pay the bills."

"Wow, I really need to study about this." Ford smiled at the thought of a new specimen.

"Don't count on it." Stan said. "When he left, pretty much everyone else forgot about him. It's sort of like their minds got erased or something …. Oh."

Both twins could easily guess the reason why.

"Well any who, Wind is gone and I can break the law as much as I want when those dorks are around, Ha!"

"I swear nothing better not be missing from my house." Carla said; which made Stanley to frown nervously. "Well back to Jersey, he left Gravity Falls after a failure he never really went too deep into." She shrugged. "Something about two kids and a brick wall." She chuckled. "He did share his stories with me of Gravity Falls' creatures like the Manotaurs and Gnomes, but not his real reason." She turned to the puddle. "He hates to live here, but I just don't see why he doesn't just move about anywhere else. It's as if it's the only vacant place for him."

"Perhaps it involves Gravity Falls' very nature itself." Ford spoke up. "Gravity Falls is a magnet for the strange and paranormal. I've made a theory on the very reason, but I'm still left with more questions."

"Well as long as he believes Wind is still there, I don't think he'll ever set foot there ever again." Carla held her finger up. "I promise I won't tell."

"Errrrrrr, who win?" Jersey regained consciousness, only for Stan to drop a rock on his head and splattered it.

"Boy I would never get away with something like that on public television."

And so the next day arrived on Glass Shard Beach as Carla and her daughter was saying their goodbyes to the Pines Twins at the pier. "I hope you had a good time here." She smiled softly.

"Well we're glad to help you out with the Jersey Devil." Ford said. "But looks like I am unable to help that person who gave us that letter."

"Such a shame, really helped us out back at Atlantis." Stanley said. "But it will be nice riding back home to Gravity Falls where fairies barf and listen to that rock that tells painful rock-puns.

"Sometimes I can't believe I consider everything you people say." Carla's daughter spoke up.

"And sorry again for trying to lie to you." Stanley said to Carla.

"And I'm sorry you still have unfinished business with your father." Carla looked away. "I'm so sorry he thrown you out."

"Don't mention it." Stanley smiled. "He's six feet under, so out of sight out of mind ….. unless his ghost comes to haunt me. If that happens, I'm sucking him up and putting him on display!"

"And I'll make sure this lantern doesn't fall to the wrong hands again." Ford patted a suitcase with the lantern inside. "Are you sure you're safe here with the Jersey Devil."

"Positive." She smiled. "I feel safer with him than with the mayor over there." She pointed at the older woman with her husband on a leash.

"Illegal letters, they don't exist, you're crazy." She spoke to some police officers.

"Heh, that would be me if I won that election back home." Stanley smiled. "Speaking of which, let set sail to where ever we parked and drive back home to see the kids and be at Wendy's 16th party."

"Yeah … she'll need us." Ford said with a serious tone. "Actually just you and the others. She barely knows me."

"She'll love to see the kids more." Stan smiled. "Say, got a cloning machine to make another set of twins to go to school while the real ones head back to Gravity Falls?"

"Only that printer." Ford laughed.

"Wendy?" Carla asked with a hint of concern.

"Oh, she's a cashier girl for my tourist trap." Stanley answered. "Let's just say her 16th birthday ….. won't go as originally planned."

"I will say no more."

And so the Pines Twins set sail on the Stan-O-War II as they waved goodbye to Carla and her daughter.

As the men were out of sight, Carla let out a huge sigh. "You know; maybe I should have hooked up with one of them. At least they won't leave me out on the curb."

"Too late now." Carla's daughter said as she received a text. "Ugh, Dad doesn't even remember my name!" She deleted the text with anger.

"What a shame …. My daughter." Carla smiled nervously as the two walk away. But from the corner of the building, someone … or something was listening.

"So the Stans have left, and Whimsical Wind is no more ….. hey Dave, who's Whimsical Wind?"

"That is for us, the Freemasons, to find out and then see if that can possibly help us revive Bill Cipher!"

The Freemasons laughed maniacally together in a not so deserted area.

"Then we can steal all the mystical creatures and give them to the boss." laughed Jake who stood beside Jenny and their cat.

"Yes, the boss will love us and we can get a pay check."

But from the shadows, came the Jersey Devil, with a bag of ice on his head. "Why must you all swarm around our lands?" Jersey raised his wings and caught the attention of the Freemasons. "Bill Cipher is no more. You lost, now please go home and leave us alone!"

One of the members smiled at Jersey and pointed his finger at the winged horse. "Well don't count your chickens before they hatched."

"In your case, they've been scrambled."

The members laughed. "Well just as long as Gravity Falls is defenseless without that Wind guy, life will find a way."

"Thank you for not doing an impersonation of that human named ….. pardon?" Jersey lowered his wings and moved his head close. "What was that about a human man named Wind?"

"Oh, we've been spying on those guys during your fight last night." One member said. "Someone that you lost to quit his job as a super hero."

"…..You don't say."

"And now there's nothing that will stop us from taking over Gravity Falls for ourselves!" The members laughed as a huge shadow cast over them. "We will find a way to revive Bill Cipher and he will be so grateful to us that he will never abandon us ever again."

"Keep talking." Jersey said with a grin as a dark aura formed around him.

"O.K., so I watched that new movie last night, the one where two kids find a book of documented mythical secrets that was written by their lost uncle or something. It was called the Spiderwi-huh? Where'd the sun goooooooo AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!"

After serval screams filled their, there was a dead silence. Many people, police included, ran towards the source of the horrid cries, but not a trace was found. Except for the cat, its fine since people will rather see other humans die over a single pet's death.

"I must say, that was some interesting information they have." From the side of another building, the Jersey Devil's head rose from his liquid form. "To think that the Feemason became something other than an annoyance to me after all these years, even more so than the Holy Order." Jersey smiled as he glanced at Carla walking out of his sights. "If what they say is true ….. then perhaps I may have another shot at leaving this worthless land behind me and claim Gravity Falls for my own. Heh heh heeeeh. Haaaa haaa Nyeh Nyeh Ne-" Jersey quickly covered his mouth, shifted his eyes for any judging eyes, and sank back to his melted form and returned to the forest, where he shall prepare for his return to Gravity Falls.

 **End of Chapter**

* * *

 **Abpmfqb texq qeb tloia pbb efj clo texq eb'p klq, Hbfqe'p cxjfiv tfii xitxvp yofkd ilsb xka zljcloq ql efp ebxoq, xka efp buzbiibkq mxvzebzh.**


	63. Tutor Dipper: 1

**Request by '** Crimson Reitor'

 **Chapter 63:** Tutor Dipper: 1

"Are you serious, man!?" Inside the Corduroy Residence, Wendy was in her room in a frantic state as she spoke to her buddy Dipper Pines online though her laptop. "Doctor Dipper Funtimes, I know you had to break a ghost girl's heart after I had to point out that huge flaw, but you want to get rid of all that stress by throwing Logarima-Loga-rhyme, Logarithm at me?!" She yanks on her hair. "I'm having some serious PTSD right now."

"And that is why we're covering that now." Dipper looked at a notebook. "And I don't want to be 'that guy' but you were the one that told me the subjects your next test will have, and Logarithm is one of them."

"But it's torture, man." Wendy dropped her head on her bed. "I know what an x and y axis plane is, but I have to use math to explain the shape of a slope. The first answer that pops into my head is 'It was born that way'."

"And let's not forget Exponential."

"It's other equally evil counterpart, or is Loga-something the counterpart?" Wendy sighs as she grabs a notebook and a pencil, and then turned on the radio to some unsettling tone, perfect for the atmosphere of her inner dread of learning. "Well lets the torture begin, only this time without the swearing."

"Thank you for that last part." Dipper cleared his throat. "Now let's begin."

"Not with that outfit!" Mabel suddenly popped up on-screen with a comedic geek glasses set with tape and a plastic snotty nose.

"Mabel, I am not wearing that. Hey, get off me!"

"Wear it you big nerd!"

"Wendy is not going to take this seriously."

"I wish I could afford to not care." Wendy watched with envy at the fun Mabel's having.

"Ta da!" Mabel presented Wendy the new and impro-, uhhh, downgraded Dipper Pines. "Now say a lame nerd line."

Dipper did not follow his sister's command. He gently took the glasses gag off, dropped it in the garbage pail, and lure Mabel out of his room with a candy bar.

"Now back to business." Dipper held up a graph. "Now exponential is y=2x while logarithm is x=log2y."

"Y= _log_ 2y? So like tree logs?"

"Well whatever make this interesting." Dipper smiled as he points at the slopes. "So let's pretend this slope is … something lumberjacks use. And the entire area is a cleared forest."

"Not helping." Wendy leaned on her bed as she took a handful of popcorn.

"Miss Corduroy, is that popcorn?" Dipper playfully scolded her. "I hope you have enough for the class."

Wendy looked around the lifeless stuffed animals she had and raised her hand. "I'm the only one with a mouth, so yes I do."

The two shared a snicker. "Now let's say that 2(3)=8. So log2(8) will equals …. (Just throwing this out here, I'm looking at a google image of this calculation. If you think you're so smart at this, then throw the first stone.)

Wendy chewed on her pencil as she writes down. "How do I add the word 'log' to math without a calculator?"

"Miss Corduroy, you may use a calculator."

"Sweet!" Wendy grinned as she grabs her graphing calculator. After staring at it for a while, Wendy rose her hand.

"Yes?"

"How do I turn on graph mode?" Wendy moved the calculator towards the camera as Dipper gave a look.

"Seriously, your school has that old model? How primitive."

"So what do I press, Professor Dorker?"

Dipper looked at the calculator. "I think you need to press that button and then that there."

"Like this?" Wendy asked as she demonstrated.

"No, the other-"

"OH MY GOSH, THIS HAS SNAKE ON IT!"

"Corduroy, we don't have all night. We're having another chat with everyone so they can meet Kimmy."

"Right." Wendy exit Snake and turned on graph mode. "Speaking of, where is the Ghost Girl?"

"Oh, I think she's taking it easy over at Beethoven's house." Dipper answered. "She's probably playing a game with him or something."

* * *

 **Meanwhile**

"And that's the story of Kingdom Brains." Beethoven said with pride. "So you think Mabel will like it too?"

"….. I'm sorry, I blacked out." Kimmy held her head. "So ….. Brainless and Losers both don't have brains, but are separate people of the same person …. The villain turned out to be, still the villain but with a fake name … this guy looks like that Loser that's not his loser… brains have bloody memories …. A book is a computer now ….the kingdom never actually showed up, just some fake ones that were made for reasons ….. I don't get it."

"Woops, I forgot about the Bedtime one." Beethoven picked up a game. "This has time travel in it and-"

"No."

"…. Pong?"

"Yes."

* * *

"I'm sure she'll get a nice tranquil rest there." Dipper held up the answer to the problem. "So did you get 3 as your answer?"

"I got an error as the answer." Wendy help up the calculator that wasn't able to process what Wendy added. "Guess you're smart and this device is dumb, or I'm the dummy here."

"Don't be like that." Dipper held up a chart of calculations. "By the way, I think you should be working on a table instead of your bed."

"Hey, you are not separating us love birds."

"Miss Corduroy, would you like to see the principal?"

"Can Mabel be the principal?"

"Sorry, she cannot."

"Boooo!" shouted both Wendy and Mabel.

"Mabel, go wait outside." Dipper ordered her sister. "You're distracting Wendy."

"Not as much as what she's smelling." Mabel smiled at Wendy who's sniffing the air.

"Steaaaaaaak." Her mouth began to water as the alluring smell of freshly cooked beef with seasonings and sauce possess her mind. "Forgot about dinner, be back in a sec."

"But We-"

And just like that, Wendy left.

 **1 Hours later**

"Boy, I love belching contests!" Wendy laughed as she walked right into her room. "Say, wasn't I in the middle of something?"

"Ahem."

Wendy's eyes widened to see Dipper still waiting online with her work still unfinished.

"Darn it." Wendy sat down and looked at the next problem. "Sorry, man."

"Let's just finish up and-"

"Actually let's call it a night." Dipper raised an eyebrow at Wendy. "I'm kind of full and …" Wendy looked into Dipper's judging eyes as she recalls the reason why she asked him to tutor in the first place. "I know. I need to push my brain harder, despite how super boring it is, or else I'm going to have to go to s-s-summer school." Wendy shivered from saying that, summer school.

With the friendship she'd made with the Pines Twins, she did not want to waste a moment during their next summer together.

Dipper's eyes widened a bit as Wendy stood straight up and adjusted the Pine Tree Cap on her head. "Dipper, give me your worst problem …. Second worst … third worst … you were thinking of some fun-way to make learning not boring while I was eating, right?'

"Right here." Dipper smiled as he held up a sheet with notes that will intrigue Wendy. "Now let's start by pretending this formula as Bill Cipher's evil spell that is preventing snacks from being made.

"Oh ho, my brain is going to take that spell down."

And with this new found confidence, Wendy was actually handling the subject quite well. Not perfect, but a lot more than I or anyone else can remember. I mean I'm just looking this up online and I'm getting lost with these formulas. Heck, am I talking about the graphs and lines still? I really don't know. So as of this moment, Wendy is smarter than us.

"So is that good?" Wendy asked as she showed him the final results.

"Hmmmmm, Wendy Corduroy, you have been in this School of Pines for a while and our records showed you aren't the highest ranking-"

"Dude, I know this fake out, but my mind is tired right now. Get to the point or I'll be sawing logs during our chat."

"B minus." Dipper answered so calmly, but Wendy wasn't the least bit calm.

"B? Did you say B?" Wendy asked unsettling, but not negatively. "As in higher than a D?!" She grinned widely. "Do not go easy on me because I'm the apple in your eye. You better not be pulling my leg here."

Dipper lightly blushed when she called herself the apple in his eye. "Nope, you actually did well in this average test."

"Oh heck yes!" Wendy jumped up and played the air guitar in victory. "I can't wait to laugh at all the teachers who hate me!"

"Don't get carried away." Dipper smiled as held up more notes. "We have a lot more to cover …. For another day." He dropped the notes. "Schools out."

"Ring ring!" Mabel popped out with a cowbell. "Ring ring!"

"And I'll see you two again real soon, with no math whatsoever!" Wendy logged off to rest her mind before seeing all her friends again.

"Wendy, making Dipper your tutor was the most genius thing you have ever done." Wendy praised herself as he rests her body and mind on her bed. "Dipper, I'm so glad you're my friend." Wendy smiled to herself as she soaks in everything she went over with Dipper in a calm matter. "Boy, is math complicated."

* * *

"This cellular phone game is supposed to be canon?!" shouted Kimmy as she turns Beethoven's room into something from the movie 'Poltergeist' "But there're other Keycardblade Wielders, but that war from some years ago wiped them all out, but those other guys are still around and at the same age! And who are these guys?! How long is this game? Who are these Japanese cartoon looking people? And why doesn't this make sense!?"

"…. There's another coming out soon." Beethoven reached for his phone the best he could to try calming the storm that is Kimmy. "It's coming out this ye-never mind, next year."

"I don't care!"

 **End of Chapter**

* * *

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	64. Desire for Pizza

**Chapter 64:** Desire for Pizza

It was a quiet night in Gravity Falls, too quiet in fact.

From the window of his home, the Pizza Guy with the 'Free Pizza' t-shirt, also known as 'That Fat Guy' stares into the dark streets. He sees parked cars, motioned cars, and a bicyclist or two, who ended up falling into a ditch because it's night time.

But this night was no ordinary night for the Pizza Guy; this was a night he had ordered Pizza for a wonderful dinner for tonight for himself, at that very same tonight. And where is this tray of, tonight, pizza he had ordered, he asks himself. But a better question is, am I going to actually have dialogue for this guy? For the second question, no. For the first question?

He had called the pizza place thirty minutes ago from the inner curiosity for his pizza, but they told him they have not heard from their delivery boy they have hired with great judgment. Usually they would be furious that they have to give their order for free when tardiness occurs, yet there was no respond from the delivery boy. Not an answer, not a message, not even a chirp.

Pizza Guy retreated to his sofa. His eyes gazed upon the T.V. of a show about liquid aliens and the reveal of a childish leader that had been slain. Usually this would be a huge revelation to the man, but how can he enjoy life with no pizza?

Life wasn't always so generous for him. He was denied pizza once and on the very next day, he was denied a package. What was in the package that the small delivery man brought, but quickly took away? Was it treasure, fame, love? He will never know.

Those two days was enough to push him into a deep depression. He was never the same again. Each day he spent his time on the sofa in front of the T.V., but after that fateful day, he now sits on that sofa in front of the T.V., with no pizza.

Why is his life like this, with no pizza? Perhaps it was because his parents didn't feed his hamster while he was at summer camp as a child, or maybe that his shirt gives a horrible feeling to other pizza joints to not serve him; or perhaps, he was simply that lazy to order Pizza until a while ago.

Where is the delivery boy, where is his pizza, where is his wallet?

The only thing he can do now is change the channel to a brand new show called 'Convenient Courage'

" _Hey, welcome to Convenient Courage!_ " shouted the host of the show. " _Are you miserable because you don't have your pizza?_ "

The Pizza Guy nodded sadly.

" _Well what are you doing? Get off your fat butt and find it! And while you're at it, also find some better wall paper!_ "

T.V., why does it always have the solution to everyone's problems? Like his. It's quite fascinating, isn't it? T.V. has been around since the dawn of the dinosaurs, even longer than that? Don't believe me? Then explain why there are dinosaur documentaries on there, huh?

Pizza Guy found a brand new aura of encouragement deep within his corpus callosum. He thanked his T.V. after it gave him advice on the upcoming election and set off to find the delivery boy.

He marched right down his walkway to get in his car. There was nothing that shall stop his quest now. He will find his pizza, he will find his happiness, and he will find-

"Dude?" Pizza Guy turned to see Robbie with a pizza on his hand. "Sooooo are you the fat guy who ordered this late pizza. It's free now, I guess."

And thus, joy has finally returned to his soul. He was so grateful that he paid Robbie the full price despite it being thirty minutes or more late and gave him a good tip.

"Sweet! Now I won't get fired!" Robbie happily ran along as Pizza Guy returned to his home. "Can't wait to get home and talk to everyone ... and I guess Dipper?"

Pizza Guy thanked the television show again after he received some more helpful advice about avoiding locally owned businesses and opened the heavenly box containing his pizza.

But it was now cold, and he has no over or microwave to heat it right up.

Why doesn't he have the essential to a home? Well because who care, dark humor is funny. Don't give me that look, I'm pretty sure Stanley will say the exact same thing!

Well there you go; a good and honest one-off chapter about a resident of Gravity Falls who was only in the background. Yes, this was a good story. I've been focusing too much on continuous content such as Kimmy the Ghost, Wind of a Hurricane, and now the Jersey Devil is up to no good.

Ya know what; I've been at this for nearly 2 years now. I think it's about time I go over some foreshadowing I've used in some past chapters. Yes, I'm doing Gravity Falls' own foreshadowing bit the entire time! So let's go over some, shall we?

So remember the chapter where Wen- Oh wait, Pizza Guy is crying now! Quick grab the camera! Say, how about I give him a voice after all.

Pizza Guy wiped away a single tear and looked into the heaven. "Pizza, why must you be so rare?"

* * *

"Oh boy, this infinite pizza was the best wish ever." Soos said as he takes infinite bites out of his infinite pizza. "Though I have to admit, it's not like pizza is a super hard to find food around Gravity Falls. Heck, even if you like somehow don't have an oven, you can get slices hot over at some restaurants. Huh, why'd I bring up ovens? Everyone has one, and microwaves."

 **End of Chapter**

* * *

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	65. Emails and Live Chats: 4

**Chapter 65:** Emails and Live Chats: 4

"Lights!" Mabel shouted as Beethoven flipped the lights on.

"Camera!" Dyami directed the camera towards themselves.

"Action!" With the last command, Dipper logged on to see their friends through live chats.

"Good evening, Gravity Falls!" Mabel, Dipper, Dyami, and Beethoven cheered to see their friends.

There was Nate, Lee, Robbie, Thompson, Tambry, Pacifica, and Wendy in their individual windows, Candy and Grenda shared one.

"Good evening, Piedmont!" Their friends cheered back.

"Yo, yo. What is up, puppy dogs?" Mabel asked as Grenda and Candy were the first to answer.

"Great!" Candy spoke up, who looks extra curious. "Now don't leave us hanging on a cliff."

Grenda was far more excited as she bangs the table. "Bring us the Ghost Girl!"

All the teen started to chant 'Ghost Girl' as the introduction to the new friend.

Dipper took a deep breath and smile. "Introducing….."

"The amazing and powerful ghost of Piedmont, Miss Kimmy …. Possible!"

"Please don't give me a random last name." Kimmy materialized with a mildly annoyed expression. "And you forgot to check if parents left for their night out already. You're welcome."

"Well she's a downer." Nate whispered to Lee.

"She gets points from us." Robbie said as he wraps his arms around Tambry who seems more interested in her phone.

"Oh." Kimmy looked at the screen. "H-Hi."

"You don't have to worry about us judging." Wendy said as she relaxed from her bed. "No one here's gonna push you down."

"Mostly from some past traumatizing experience." Thompson said as the other teens shivered.

"Especially not from me." Pacifica smiled. "If I learned two things from last summer, it's that I need to be a better person and to never rip off the spirits from the dead."

"You must be Pacifica." Kimmy looked at the blonde girl and looked at Candy and Grenda. "And you two are Mabel's party friends."

"We're friends with a spirit." Candy held in her excitement the best she could as Grenda shout out all the cool stuff they can do together, some of which includes reading werewolf love books.

"I'll skip that one." Kimmy said as she looked at Wendy. "We sort of already met." Kimmy held in a blush from that small embarrassing moment.

"Yep, and I'll always remember that." Wendy laughed softly. "So how's it feels staying at the Pines residents?"

"Eh, it's better than in the forest alone." She feels her arm. "I mean I can't really do much except stay invisible when the parents are home. It's even harder when they installed those security cameras outside."

"We always call it a glitch when the camera picks her up." Mabel said. "Like when the temperature gets cold, glitch. When a single object moves, glitch. And when mom freaks out when she noticed Kimmy just walking through the wall, Super Glitch!"

"One time that happened!" Kimmy quickly spoke up. "Other than that, I only appear when it's just Dipper and Mabel here."

"Dude, sounds like a plot to a movie." Wendy held her fingers up. "How many did we watch with that over used story, Dipper?"

"Five." Dipper chuckled. "Like the one with a boy with magical pixie slaves."

"Movies are weird." Dyami said as Kimmy nodded. "From my eyes, I say that Kimmy really proved herself to be a true friend."

"Like when we play Super Bash Sisters." Beethoven said. "She beats us every time and demands rematches, even after midnight."

Kimmy rubbed the back of her head. "It's still new to me."

"Did you try Monstermon?" Candy asked.

"I stay away from Japanese cartoons." Kimmy thought back of some confusing. "Speaking of, wasn't there another friend that likes that stuff."

"Yeah, where's Soos?" Dipper asked Wendy.

"He's busy planning for Halloween." Wendy smiled as she rubs her hands. "He's gonna do this huge haunted house and I'm going to be the serial killer!" Wendy suddenly had a stroke of genius. "Ooh, ooh, Kimmy! You have got to float over here, you'll be perfect!"

"Can I?" Kimmy asked herself. "Aren't I stuck here for some unfinished business?" She turned to Dipper. "I can travel, right?"

"Doesn't hurt to try." Dipper shrugged.

"Not unless if w _e_ make our own haunted house!" Mabel shouted. "I hereby declare a challenge to see who haunted house is the best!"

"Mabel we don't have the profit for one." Dipper added, but Mabel gave a look that she has another plan.

"Don't you dare bring my old orphanage into this." Kimmy gave Shooting Star a dead stare that quite the hyper girl down.

"Orphanage?" Robbie looked puzzled, but then snapped his finger from remembering. "Yeah, didn't you die because some bullies-" He was quickly silenced by Tambry covering his mouth.

"Not a good time." She informed her boyfriend with a slightly higher tone.

"Don't worry too much." Kimmy said. "Forty years ago, so whatever."

"Well don't you have unfinished business? Thompson asked with an unsettled breath. "Like, get revenger of something, I dunno?"

"Yeaaaaah." Robbie smiled. "Revenge for your murder. They better make a movie after that!"

Kimmy held her head. "I just started school and later I put these guys through heck, I just want to figure this out with a clear mind and don't do anything rash again."

"Oh I hear ya, man. I hear ya." Wendy smiled. "So let's put all that stressful stuff behind and talk about fun stuff."

"Yeah!" the friends all cheered.

So then on they all talked about each other and their interests. Dyami talked about some paranormal videos he found (which some didn't take so literally), Beethoven gloat about himself lifting twenty pounds (they also didn't take so seriously), Nate and Lee talked about a movie they watched which gotten a few laughs from Kimmy, Tambry and Robbie just spoke about their relationship for too long, Pacifica informed them that she took part in helping Candy with something (which she did not want to go into details despite how much Dipper asked), and even Kimmy opened up some more to express her interests like video games and super heroes, then finally there's Wendy boosting how great of a tutor Dipper is.

"I mean he's really an awesome tutor. Remember the logar-something-inator, well he made it …. Well it's pretty impossible to make math completely understandable, but he still made it better."

"Really?" Thompson gasped. "I'm having problems with my science class."

"And I'm terrible at writing." Nate said.

"I already know English, why do I need another language!" Robbie shouted.

"Can you tutor us?" Lee pleas to Dipper, who looked overwhelm from the endless flattery.

"C-come on, guys …. Well I am really smart." Dipper's self-esteem rose up as he started boasting about his own wits. "I am able to calculate a preside throw to beat a rigged carny game. And I am great at chemistry."

"Teach me how to resist drinking it." Grenda suddenly spoke.

Dipper chuckled to himself as any trace of embarrassment was replaced with self-pride. "Did I mention I won three science fairs in a row?"

"I could have won if the judges love sprinkles." Mabel said. "Those cupcakes were nerdy enough, nerdy sweets!"

"Oh Mabel." Pacifica laughed softly as she turned to Dipper. "Dipper, you're still a dork to me, but not lame."

Dipper grinned. "Just like how I handled the Category 10 ghost."

"And don't forget that amazing performance of how you handle walking right into that pillar." Pacifica responds with a playful comeback that the two laughed at.

"Huh, never thought I would see Pacifica be this friendly to commoners." Nate said.

"All thanks to that lumberjack ghost and the ultimate brother the universe have ever known, Dipper!" Mabel smiled brightly. "You bust that ghost and showed Pacifica she can still be the best person ever!"

Even with Dipper's high praise, he couldn't help but feel bashful by the complements from his own sister, and neither can Pacifica.

"Hey, I can still say some nasty comments here or there." Pacifica smiled as she rubs her head. "Like just the other day I told a woman that her dress looks average ….." Pacifica and Dipper started laughing much higher as the other gets a kick out of it.

"Well Dipper, I'm impressed." Kimmy smiled as she floats around the boy. "Taming spirits, fighting monsters, and making bad people good. Wish I had you back then."

"H-Huh?" Dipper asked as Pacifica looked just as confused.

"…..I uh mean as a good friend to ya know, stop the bullies." Kimmy's face turned red as Pacifica raised an eyebrow.

"Oh I see something going on." Candy said with a chuckle.

"And I think that something needs to be addressed, Candy." Grenda said. "Now tell us Dipper and Kimmy. HOW'D THE DATE GO!?"

"Date?!" The teens besides Wendy all shouted from shock, as someone sounded somewhat harsher.

"Oh boy." Both Dipper and Kimmy went silence as Mabel jumped in front of the camera.

"Abort, abort!" Mabel jumped up in front of Dipper and Kimmy frantically waving her arms. Candy and Grenda knew what this meant and kept quiet, but the others weren't getting the message.

"Dr. FunTime, you dated a ghost?" Nate said. "Nice!"

"Is this creepy?" Thompson asked. "I mean I'm not judging or anything, it's just …. I dunno."

"Wow, that is so …. I think I want to say a compliment to you or something." Robbie said, unsure on what to really say.

"So you guys go to the movies or an amusement park?" Lee asked. "Tell us girl, you must have had a great time with Dipper."

"So when's the big wedding day, huh?" Even Tambry lifted her eyes to make a small joke.

Dipper and Kimmy franticly glanced at each other with embarrassment before Dipper could try and clear things up.

"Guys, it, we. Well it was fun." Dipper rubbed his head as the two blushed. "She showed me this monster turtle in the lake and revealed that a tree is actually a prehistoric animal." Dipper started to laugh. "And she said that 'Food has no meaning to me anymore'. O.K., that sounded really dark now that I said it out loud, but it sounded cute from her, I mean-" He started flapping his arms from embarrassment as Kimmy hid her dark red face from the teasing teens. "It was great, but then-"

"You went on a date with this dead girl?!" Pacifica spoke up in a rather furious tone. "And she tried to destroy you before!"

Kimmy grinned with regret from her episodes and then tries to calm Pacifica. "I-I know what you're thinking, but we-"

But Pacifica ignored Kimmy and kept talking. "I know I've been terrible, but I never tried to destroy anyone. What if she tries it again?"

Kimmy clenched her fists with an irritation. "It only happened twice, I will-"

"Twice?!" Now it was Mabel to speak up. "When did the second time come?" Mabel studied Dipper's look swiftly and gasped. "Kimmy, you didn't attack Dipper during the date, did you?"

"Me!?" Kimmy turned to Mabel from shock. "N-N ….. eh….."

"You did, didn't you!" They all turned to Pacifica with her eyes narrowing at Dipper. "Did she hurt you again, Dipper?"

"Pacifica, she didn't mean to-"

"I know that look, Dipper!" Pacifica started growling as she turned back to Kimmy. "What did you do you-you gloom queen!"

"This doesn't look good." Robbie said as he whispered to Tambry to film this.

Wendy, being the voice of reason, reached out to Pacifica. "Paz, let's just talk about this nice and-"

"Not now, Wendy!" Pacifica shouted. "Look here emo corpse, what did you do to him?"

From what they've seen from Kimmy, she would normally back down and spoke quietly when feeling guilty for her actions, but here they just see her growing more angry towards the rich girl.

"Emo Corpse, eh?" With a twitch in her eyes, Kimmy pushed the kids away with a paranormal force and flew straight to the screen. "Try living in a run-down building with no parents and with only one person there that never treated you like trash you … you pampered spoiled dumb blonde!"

"Oh you think I'm some lazy good for nothing girl, do ya!" Pacifica leaned closer to the camera. "I partake in countless activities during my twelve year life, that's more than just floating in the woods for years!" She pounded her desk. "My family has done horrible things in the past, but you don't see any of them trapping a few kids in some nightmarish building all just because you're being an obsessive creepy loser with no friends!"

Kimmy gasped as all the kids just stare in shock and fear. "….. You don't know me." Her neck started to crack as her hair covers her face. "You don't know what I've been through, and you don't know _her_ at all!"

Pacifica anger extinguish as fast as it appears as Kimmy's body started to stretch. "You have no right to judge me you …. You….."

Before she could say anything else, the computer immediately shut down. Kimmy stares at the dark screen and slowly turned to the outlet.

"I panicked, O.K.!" shouted Beethoven with the wire in his hand.

Her eyes slowly widen as she returned to normal. "Did I break or harm you guys?"

Dipper, Mabel, and Dyami slowly nodded no which relieved the spirit, but not her anger.

"What was wrong with her, why did she have to act like that!?" The kids wanted to speak out, but Kimmy filled in herself. "Don't bother, I'll say it myself." She took a deep breath and spoke in third person. "But Kimmy, you got angry too, you should have remembered that her parents trained her with a bell. ….. Ugh, the bell!" Kimmy slapped her forehead. "And I don't know HER at all! This is just going to be the whole 'We got off from the wrong end' or 'It was a big misunderstanding', but why did she start first? Well yeah it was when she found out about my second attack, but she sounded angry before. But I …. She … Ahhh!"

Kimmy floated up into the air and turned to the window. "I am going to let out steam in the forest. I'll hear your lecture later and with Pacifica …. I dunno! Just do what I didn't." The ghost flew through the window, noticed Lightning the Fairy outside who looks like she wanted to hang out, shew her away, and flew towards the park.

"Well ….. that could have gotten worse." Beethoven tried to lighten up the mood, but Dyami motioned him to cut it out now.

"D-Dipper?" Mabel asked her brother who moved to his bed with his fingers pinching between his eyes.

"Sure, more drama, why not?" Dipper sighed as he collapsed on his bed. "She got angry before I could explain why it didn't work. Luckily she snapped herself out before it gotten out of hand, well it was already out of hand, but …. We talked, we made up, but now this." He threw his arms in the air. "And now Pacifica, what was up with her? Well she found out I got hurt, but she, well it would be, ugh." He grasped his face. "Is this what you call Teen Drama?"

"I hope not." Mabel sat on the bed besides him. "We just need to talk this over when they both cooled down."

"She is right." Dyami said as Beethoven plugged the computer in. "I suggest we get your other friends back online and tell them we're all safe to vanquish their worries."

"Then maybe one of them can talk to Pacifica and we can talk to Kimmy." Beethoven said. "That is when she's really in a better mood."

Mabel leaped off Dipper's bed and logged in. "I'll email my girls, maybe they or Wendy can talk some sense into Pacifica."

"Well those two aren't the only ones that need a breather." Dipper said with a tired voice. "Can I have some alone time after you're done?"

"Sure thing, getting late anyway." Beethoven answered as Mabel wrote an email to Candy and Grenda.

After hearing back from them that Wendy will try and talk to Pacifica, they left Dipper's room and head downstairs.

"So Mabel?" Dyami scratched his head. "Is Pacifica really that quick to anger?"

"Well, something like this never happened before." Mabel said with her finger on her chin. "She only became one of us after that party, and then we only saw her again when Weirdmageddon happened." She tilted her head. "Thought after Dipper busted that ghost, she would have been more involved with our next shenanigans of ours. Strange, it's like a T.V. show that resolved a bad character for the better, and yet never did anything with it."

"Well I just hope they don't argue again. I can't take another haunted house!" Beethoven shivered. "I think I want to skip Halloween this year."

"Not on my life!" Both Mabel and Dyami shouted. "Jinx!" They two shouted again. "Double Jinx!" The two grinned.

"Tripl-"

"Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!"

"… I want to laugh, but not after all that."

"Me too." Mabel slouched down with a frown. "And yet …. I feel like I should instinctively know what got Pacifica upset in the very first place."

 **End of Chapter**

* * *

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	66. Chillin with Pacifica

**Chapter 66:** Chillin' with Pacifica

Another day came to Gravity Falls after that unfortunate Saturday night. From their past with the abandon convenient story, most of the teens wanted to avoid the situation that took place between Pacifica and Kimmy.

Mabel's friends, Candy and Grenda, were the first to manage to get in contact with Pacifica, but even they couldn't get a lot out of her, just that she's in too much of a terrible mood to talk.

Wendy was the wisest out of the three girls, so she figured she can try talking to Pacifica face to face after a day.

Despite being the cool friend (minus when she's at home with her hyper family), even she was caught off guard by the two girls' sudden argument. She was no super genius, but she was indeed no dummy. After a good moment, she came to a conclusion that she is well educated on.

"Well, Professor Dipper 2.0 Corduroy, time for a preteen brain check-up."

She walked up to the new Northwest Mansion and found no doorbell. "Really, too cheap for even a button?" She then eyed the big and fancy knocker with sparkly eyes. "Or better yet!" With a grin, she used the knocker and it gave off a big and important sounding thump.

The one who answered the door was Preston himself. "Oh, you're the Corduroy Girl my daughter befriended." He smiled. "Here to show our daughter-" Suddenly he went full sad opera as he cover his eyes and turned away. "The way of a commoner."

"Ahhhhhh!" Mrs. Northwest screeched from somewhere.

"Seriously, shrinks, now." Wendy was pointed to Pacifica's room, which took her roughly 30 minutes to find. "Who built this!?" She found the bedroom and knocked three times. "Hey Paz? It's me, We-" But then the door quickly opened and Wendy was pulled right. "Hey!" The lumberjack girl was quick to act and picked up the intruder and pinned them to the ground.

"Hey, it's me!"

Wendy jumped back to see it was Pacifica, looking not so happy. "Woah, sorry there. But you can't just …. Pull ….. the heck is all this!?"

Wendy gestured to Pacifica room, which looked like it got a make-over, a make-over by a witch doctor.

"I know what you're thinking." Pacifica folded her arms. "I'm just making sure nothing happens."

"It's alright." Wendy smiled. "With all these shrunken heads, you'll be back to having nightmares in no time!"

"I'm serious with this." Pacifica gave a cold response. "I've angered a ghost and I am not getting this family cursed again."

"Oh I heard about that." Wendy rubbed her head. "Did ya ever catch the name of that lumberjack ghost? I think Dipper recognized a photo of one of my ancestors."

"Really?" Pacifica felt awkward and guilty. "He's in a better place now, but if Kimmy ever comes here, I won't know what to do." Pacifica then showed Wendy an Ouija Board on a table. "And since you're here, I need our help."

Wendy tilted her head. "Before this summer, I would jump right at this." Wendy held up a hand. "But I am not getting myself into ghost again. Ever!"

"Please Wendy, I need to speak with Kimmy without her coming here."

"But aren't you afraid she'll just, I dunno, jump out of the board?"

Pacifica shook her head. "I looked up online on how to repel ghosts." Pacifica put on some weird looking tribal hat thing. "I found a blog written by one of Dipper's new friends, Dyami." She showed Wendy the site on her tablet. "See, right here."

Wendy eyed the content on the movie-based information and raised an eyebrow at Pacifica. "You couldn't sleep last night, could you?"

"No."

Wendy sighed. "Alright, I'll do it." She leaned down and looked directly into Pacifica's eyes. "But only if we're talking to Kimmy, and you better have something that will burn some demons to a crisp."

"Dipper had Holy Water on him when he helped me out." Pacifica took out a vial of Holy Water and smiled. "If dad let me use his private jet, I would have had Dipper brought here in an instant to help me."

"That would be great." Wendy grinned. "And a private jet to go to somewhere far out, like Africa!"

"If only my parents aren't as cheap as they are now." Pacifica rubbed her head. "But don't worry, Wendy. Dipper taught me a few other things after I broke that curse."

" _Here's my chance_." Wendy thought to herself as she sits with Pacifica. "So anyway, you and Dipper had a great time at the free-for-all party?"

Pacifica chuckled. "I did. I can't believe I've been avoiding him all summer because I thought he was a loser and also being Mabel's brother." She eyed at the board. "But we should really get this going."

" _I'm_ _gettin' there_." Wendy nodded as she joined in on the Ouija Board. "Seriously, are we safe?"

Pacifica proudly smiled as she pulled up a gallon of Holy Water on the table. "Yes you will be amazed at what you can buy."

The two girls placed planchette as Wendy called out to Kimmy. "Oh spooky ghost of Kimmy. Show your-"

"Wait!" Pacifica interrupted. "She doesn't need to show herself, or come. Just talk."

Wendy restarted. "Oh spooky ghost of Kimmy, talk to uuuuuuussss. We are cooooooooooool."

They wait for a response from the other side. Pacifica showing signs of nervousness as sweat runs down her face. Wendy kept her appearance calm, but mentally prays that they don't mess up.

It took a while, but the suddenly the planchette started to move slightly.

"Wendy I swear if that's just you-"

"Shuuuuush." Wendy spoke up. "Let the board do its job."

They watch the board closely for any movement, ready to memorize what letters it will show, until it started ringing like a phone.

"What!?" The two jumped back as the planchette started vibrating and ringing a techno tune. Pacifica glanced at Wendy who only shrugged from shock.

With a deep gulp, Pacifica picked up the planchette and answered it, if it works.

"Hello?" Pacifica asked. "Is this …. Kimmy?"

As Wendy closely listened, they heard a tired voice from the other line.

"Jersey Devil residence."

"Jersey Devil?!" The two girls asked. They listen closely as the voice started mumbling.

"Mmmm, what line is this again? Yeti, is that you…. No this is the ….. Oh snap!" A low tumble was heard as the voice now sounds different. "This-This is your granny. How are you, sonny."

"My granny's alive ….. I think." Pacifica tried to recall.

"Uh, this is your dog."

"Arf." The Golden Retriever was heard outside the door.

"Elvis."

"I bet he's hiding out somewhere." Wendy added.

"I uh ….. your mother?"

Wendy quickly grabbed the planchette and crushed it in her hands. "Well I'm done with ghosts." Wendy stood up and looked at all the voodoo decorations. "So are you renting all this or can I use it for Halloween?"

"You're too late." Pacifica stood up. "My parents already want to use them for their party."

"They're throwing a party?" Wendy asked. "Let me guess. Halloween night right on the same time schedule as the Mystery Shack's party."

"I don't know that old shovel's schedule, but most likely." Pacifica said. "It's just their way to keep their rich and pride side, but-"

"I'm as rich as a common millionaire!" Preston cried out.

"I doubt he'll even notice all the guests sneaking out." Pacifica let out a laugh. "So is the Mystery Shack going to have a Halloween Party?"

"Yep, and you get an invite." Wendy winked. "Especially since Soos is having the whole thing free. Boy, Mr. Pines will flip." Wendy laughed to herself.

"So will this party partake in the paranormal?" Pacifica formally asked. "Such as the revival of the highly regarded members of the living dead?"

Wendy laughed. "Actually, after Gideon got locked up for spying on everyone, Dipper really did raise the dead."

"Are you serious?" Pacifica grinned. "On purpose or was it an accident?"

"I think they mentioned about showing off to some secret agents." Wendy scratched her head. "But you gotta hear how they stop those hoard of zombies." Wendy laughed.

"Zombies? Dipper fought zombies!?" Wendy noticed the sparkle in Pacifica's eyes. "Did he set them all on fire? Decapitate each one? Oh oh, he found a magic wand and vaporized them."

" _Looks official to me_." Wendy smiled as she answered. "Karaoke."

"…Pardon?"

"Karaoke." Wendy folded her arms behind her back. "Three part harmony to whatever girly song Mabel chose and their singing exploded their heads. And no it wasn't 'they were that bad' kind of way."

Pacifica was speechless. Zombies were beaten by singing? It just sounded so stupid. So, so stupid. "Did …. Did they beat any other monsters in such a ridiculous way?"

"Eh, probably. I wasn't with them for all of it." Wendy answered as she recalls her first known experience with the paranormal and Dipper's only way to save their butts.

"Heh … heh." Pacifica started to slowly laugh at all the silly possibilities that the twins did to save the day. "What next, they beat a bunch of garden gnomes with a leaf blower?"

"Yes." Spoke Jeff the Gnome at the window. "Would any of you two like to be our-" Then Wendy pushed him off and closed the window.

"Don't ask." Wendy told the rich girl, who equally both wanted to know and felt she would be disgusted by it.

"Well then, when Dipper comes back next summer, I want to see it all." Pacifica said as she sat on her bed.

"You don't say?" Wendy smiled as she sits next to her. " _I only heard Dipper's name_." She mischievously smiled as she continues the conversation. "Like what?"

"Whatever's out there." Pacifica looked out the window ….. Jeff is back.

"You didn't hear our offer. Would you-" Wendy jolted to the window, picked up Jeff, punched him in the face, and dropped him off the second floor room.

"If you want to hang with Dipper, you need to be tough." Wendy blew on her knuckles.

"Like when I have to fight alongside Mabel to fight those golf ball people." Pacifica said as she recalled her only time having fun with Mabel. "This summer, I'm going to be different when they come back." As Pacifica thought about it, a horrid idea struck her mind. "They … they wouldn't be bringing Kimmy along, would that?"

Wendy's eyes widened. "That would be so COOL!" Wendy jumped up. "I hope she can make other people transparent. We can sneak into the school and mess up all the teachers stuff! Oh, the look on their faces when we scare the pants off them!" Wendy started to lose control over her laughter. "I can have her scare my brothers out of the house when I want peace and prank Mr. Pines so badly! And she can destroy any monster! I want her to come now! I sooooo need to rock with that!-" Wendy noticed Pacifica's shot eyes and motionless state. "Ghost Girl that you need to recoil with. Then all three of us can ROCK THIS TOWN!"

As Wendy fantasized her next amazing summer, Pacifica wasn't too sure she can get passed that little road block.

"Unless of course that ghost curses me for all times and I can't do a thing about!"

Wendy stopped her little party. "Pacifica, I think the first thing you gotta do is chill."

"Chill?"

"Yep." Wendy smiled. "Take deep breaths, lie down, and relax."

Pacifica folded her arms and pouted. "Yeah, because a blood thirsty ghost is a girl's perfect holiday."

"Hey, remember what I said." Wendy spoke to Pacifica, still keeping that frown. "Now first. You take deep breaths."

"Fine." Pacifica inhaled and exhaled deep and slowly, while still keeping that face.

"Good. Now lay down."

Pacifica fell back on her bed, still keeping that poster.

"Now you untie those arms and take that frown off." Wendy tapped her feet as Pacifica kept her posture. "I'm waiting."

Pacifica sighed and did as Wendy told.

"Now think happy thoughts." Wendy snickered to herself. "Like say, how you'll spend your summer with Dipper."

"Dipper…." Pacifica's breath started to slow down as she imagined all kind of quests she can go on with Dipper. Like discover treasures, hidden history, or even a monster; all in the crazy manor of how they've beat those zombies. She even laughed to herself if they come across a bear that wants to eat them, which was an actual teddy bear.

"Feeling better?" Wendy asked as she sits next to the bed.

"Yes, yes I am." Pacifica softly smiled. "So next time we chat online, I'm going to apologize." She turned to Wendy. "But still, when they told me what happened, I got furious."

"I hear ya." Wendy nodded. "And I'm sure things will work out. I don't think there's going to be that kind of drama anytime soon."

"That's nice to think about." Pacifica softly said.

"So Paz…."

Pacifica picked up her head.

"What got you angry first?"

"Huh?" Pacifica sat up. "What do you mean? We were just talking about it …. first?"

"I think you know." Wendy grinned devilishly. "I kind of noticed you were looking different when they talked about Dipper's date with Kimmy the Ghost."

"The date?" Pacifica scratched her head. "To tell you the truth, I was feeling a bit angry for some reason?"

" _Angry for some reason?_ " Wendy thought to herself. " _Oh this could mean two things._ " Wendy hid her smile. "Pacifica. You can tell me anything." She turned to her. "If you have something to share, I'll keep it between us only." Wendy zipped up her lip and threw away the slider. "Trust me."

"Actually I don't really know why myself." Pacifica felt her head. "They were talking about ice cream and some weird turtle monster, but then I just ….. I felt angry for some reason." Pacifica held her hands together. "I was just as shocked as everyone else when they first brought it up."

" _I wouldn't say like everyone one_." Wendy's mind was getting anxious.

"And then I asked why he went out with a ghost, a ghost that tried to destroy him. Pacifica grasped her arms. "And then after that we found out she tried again!" Pacifica managed to catch onto her anger and calm down. "Wow, I almost lost it again."

"And you really don't know why?" Wendy raised an eyebrow. "You can trust me? Tell me how you feel."

Pacifica closed her eyes. "I'm sorry, Wendy. But I really don't know."

" _Oh my ….._ " Wendy tried hold in a big smile as Pacifica kept on talking.

"It's weird really. It actually started when they were talking about how much fun they had together. I just don't get it."

" _GOOOOOOSH! She doesn't even realize it! She doesn't … even ….._ " Wendy couldn't hold it any longer. She burst out laughing and rolled around the floor. "You …. you are so …"

"I'm what?!" Pacifica asked the once calmed girl who's now laughing like a maniac. "What is going on with you?!"

Still laughing, Wendy managed to pick herself up. "I … I'm sorry. But … but you're going to …. Have to figure this one OUT!"

Pacifica's jaw hangs as one eye started to twitch. "What the heck, Wendy! I thought we were friends!"

"We're still are!" Wendy laughed. "But boy when you realize why, you'll ….. Aaaah ha ha ha!"

Pacifica started to growl in anger. "Fine, I admit I can't stay mad at you forever! But please tell me!"

Still laughing uncontrollably, Wendy walked herself out of Pacifica's room, passed the depressed Northwests, and head out the door.

"I … I know I'm being a huge jerk, but ….. I'm sorry, this is gold!"

"Wait, come back!" Pacifica called out to Wendy who is now strolling along on her bike as she started to laugh.

"Well when I figure out what's going on with me, I better feel like a huge dummy!" Pacifica shouted as she slams the door, but poked her head out. "And I'm going to figure it out all by myself too ….. also I'm still going to your birthday party on the 13th!"

As Pacifica moved inside, Wendy stopped her laughter and fell off her bike. "Of course this day wouldn't end on a joke." Wendy picked herself off and looked back at the mansion. "Well you're almost a teenager, you'll get it in no time." Wendy smiled as she looked at her bike. "Hope you have a better teenhood than me so far." She clenched her fists on the handle and road back home.

 **End of Chapter**

 **Exmmv pbzlka vbxo xkkfsbopxov!**


	67. All Spooked Up

**Chapter 67:** All Spooked Up

"Is everything ready for departure?" Mr. Soos Mystery said to his first mate, Melody.

"Aye Aye, Oh Captain, My Captain." Melody saluted.

"Good." Soos nodded. "Now Skipper Wendy, press the button."

Wendy saluted and took out a red button. "Big alluring button pressing in three …. two ….. one. And press!" With a huge grin, Wendy pressed the button and a bolt of electricity traveled through the wire a that stretched across the Mystery Shack, passing reach and every new electronic they've installed.

One by one, multiple lights and attractions turned alive as they spring up across the wooden building. Orange lights flickered around the railings and windows, plastic bats shot out from the trees, zombies poke out from around Styrofoam tombstones, Jack-O-Laturns scattered the shack grew arms that reach out at a unexpected squirrel, ghosts popped out from windows, and cheap sounding wolf snarls can be heard from underneath the deck.

But lastly, from within a coffin, arose the mistress of darkness herself, Abuelita the Vampire Queen. "I sip your blood now."

"Awesome!" All three high fived

"Soos, you've done it again!" Soos congratulated himself for his work of art. "And wait until we decorate the party room." Soos examined the building. "Say, I'm only realizing this now, but doesn't the Mystery Shack look bigger from the inside than it does outside?"

The three examined the house, but Wendy shrugged it off soon after. "Eh, I'm just too excited for Gravity Falls's favorite holiday, Halloween!" Wendy the Handy Gal jumped up in joy. "Summerween is just the taste of what the real deal brings! I already have my werewolf costume planned."

"And I shall be Soos the Umpire." Soos smiled. "I figured since Abuelita's a vampire and umpire rhymes with vampire. It just fits."

"Very good." Melody complimented. "But I am going to be the most horrifying thing imaginable." She gave the two a creepy smile. "A second job you _need_ to have!"

The two gasped. "Maybe I should rethink high school?" Wendy thought for a moment. "…Nah."

Soos grinned like a fool as they walked around the house. "I've been waiting for this all September, which for some reason felt like two years for me. Anyone else?"

"Actually, it felt that long for me too?" Melody rubbed her head.

"Me three." Wendy glanced around. "So …. Spooky."

The three then laughed together.

"But seriously. This is like going to be the best Halloween ever." Soos took out the blue prints for the party. "And the party is going to be no different. Well except that it will be free for the public."

 **Space**

"AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!"

"Stanley, what's wrong!?" Stanford asked Stanley as they drive through a country side with the Stan-O-War II hooked onto their car.

"We need to get back home to Gravity Falls before Halloween, pronto!"

"Stan, we'll be back way before that." Ford afformed him. "Remember, we'll drive across the country and reach the kids, have at least one stop for the paranormal, and arrive at Gravity Falls before Wendy's birthday at an unrealistic short amount of time, despite dragging around this huge boat."

"Oh yeah, I forgot."

 **Space**

"Before Halloween arrives, I have the perfect tour set up." Soos smiled. "Who wants to go first?"

Both Melody and Wendy raised their hands.

"Great, now lets' go!"

Soos begins his Halloween edition of the Mystery Shack Tour, DLC sold separately, to his very important employees. "So you two remember how we have that Evil Donut from the Planet Delaware?"

The two nodded.

"Well I ate that, so I replaced it with this!" Soos presented the new Halloween attraction. "Behold, from the Darkest Trench of Commercialism, comes the greatest threat to trademarking, Multi the Mascot Mutation!"

Melody ooohed at the model which looks like someone teared up a bunch of product characters and sowed them up together.

"Many companies tried to sue this creature, but nobody knows who made it, thus driving them to madness, sort of like road rage madness, only less damage and the kids won't learn new words."

Soos brought them over to his next new attraction. "And here we have the many-headed bear with a gnome lawyer standing next to him … wait a minute. I don't remember making a bear that looks exactly like Multi-Bear."

"That is because I am the Multi-Bear, sir." Multi-Bear glared at him as the Gnome Lawyer opened up his briefcase.

"My client learned of this 'Multi Mascot' and demands you replace 'Multi' with something else."

"But nobody owns the right to 'Multi'?" Melody opened up her phone to a website. "See."

Multi-Bear looked at the phone as the lawyer gulped. "Say now, I thought you said-"

"Well look at the time, I got to go handle a divorce between ….. organic lifeforms?" He shrugged sheepishly and bolted out the door.

"So ….. want to see the tour too?"

Multi-Bear nodded as he travels with the humans around the shack.

"And here we have our fortune teller, Mister King of Heads."

On a table sat the Wax Head of Larry King in a glowing glass orb. "So you want your entire life spoiled for you? Tell me about that."

"I'll go first." Melody cheerfully laughed as she sits down. "Oh talking celebrity head, tell me of my future."

"Well for starters, you'll be having ramen tonight. Then for desert, one cupcake since your adulthood body won't allow any more consumption of sugar loaded junk."

"I hope Gravity Falls has a Fountain of Youth somewhere." Melody hoped.

"Extra Double hopeful, right here." Wendy threw in. "So what cha got for me?"

If he had shoulders, he would shrug. "Kind of blurry, it's like its being blocked on purpose. Giving this whole 'You don't know where your life is going and you should fell anxiety' vibe. How interesting."

"Oh ha ha ha." Wendy sarcastically laughed as she stood up. "So what's next on the list?"

"Oh plenty of things." Soos said. "Let's start off with the wand that can magically bring you straight to the end of the tour in under a few seconds."

And so they passed through all the new artifacts Soos have _cough_ made _cough_ until they reached the very last attraction.

"And so I saved this really awesome thing for the last thing." Soos removed a red curtain. "Introduction, something I found yesterday, these guys!"

The curtains unfold and the audience gasped.

"It can't be!" Multi-Bear gasped.

"No way!" Melody held her mouth.

"It's …." Wendy's eyes widened. "Dipper!?" She grinned like an idiot and ran up to Dipper for a hug. "No way, what are yoouuuu doing with that cap I already swapped with?" She looked at her Pine Tree Cap to see it was very identical to the boy, with one slight difference. "And why are you a lighter tone, and why are there two of you?"

Wendy looked down at the Dipper doppelganger with the letter 4 marked on his cap.

"Hey, it's my turn to hug Wendy!" shouted the other clone with a 3 on his cap.

"Hey, it's still my turn!"

"No, mine!"

Then the two started wrestling like brothers and rolled all the way outside.

"H-How?!" Wendy's jaw dropped as Soos scratched his head.

"Oh, Dipper made some clones with that old copy machine." Soos said. "I tried it with a pie. Did not taste well, but I ate it anyway."

"Well I think that's all the weird stuff for me today." Multi-Bear shook Soos's hand. "But I had fun. I'm sure you will do fine. But I might suggest you have an audio playing light and eerie music for the atmosphere."

Soos's eyes widened. "Dude, you are like a genius or something."

Multi-Bear smiled and gave his farewells to Soos and Melody.

The couple walked outside as they gazed at the haunted house in the sunset. "I have to admit, but I kind have boring Halloweens ever since I turned 13." Melody looked away slightly. "Not really the social party types. Mostly just buy candy and watch horror films."

"Boy, that sounds dark." Soos smiled. "But no more. Halloween is like the most important holiday in Gravity Falls." He wrapped his arms around Melody. "If this ends up being boring, then I guess the world will end again."

Melody laughed. "I'll hold your promise to that."

The two sat there as they watch the decorated Mystery Shack in the twilight of Gravity Falls, the sign of another Halloween Season for their home. That is until Wendy fell out of the entrance way, fighting another version of herself.

"I told you, I am not doing your boring stuff!" shouted the clone with a 2 one her cap as she punches the real Wendy in the face.

"And I said I gave you life for like five minutes ago, you don't know what boring is yet!" Then three more clones dog piled the two as the Dipper clones watch from a distance.

"Are they fighting over me?" asked Dipper Clone 4.

"No, me!" Dipper Clone 3 then tackled 4 to the ground.

"Sheesh." Soos sat up. "I'm just going to grab my squirt gun." He turned to Melody. "Don't worry, I won't squirt the Dipper dudes. They can be great for future stuff."

 **End of Chapter**

 **Exmmv Exiiltbbk, bsbk qelrde fq cbbip ifhb Pxfkq Mxqofzh Axv fp kbuq.**


	68. My Marks

**Chapter 68:** My Marks

"Mmmmm." Getting out of bed is annoying, especially when you're a bouncer at the bar, which is why our Tattoo Guy is miserable. He works at the bar that seems to be open in mornings, go figure, and is popular with some of the muscular and angry people of Gravity Falls. Like the Pool Guy who attacks anyone that insult the pool. "I hate mornings."

See how relate-able this man without an official name is.

Tattoo Guy rose from bed and yawned, ready for a miserable day. He walked to the kitchen mirror for a shave, until he noticed something wasn't right.

"Wait a minute." He scratched his hairy chin and realized something awful had happened. "My tattoos! They're gone!"

He looked at his muscular body in a panic and found that he is completely clean of any tattoos. All the artwork, all the beauty, all the money he'd spent, gone. All gone.

"What happened to my tattoos!?"

"Bwa ha ha!"

With bloodshot eyes, he slowly turned to the doorway to see some sort of fat leprechaun, covered in his tattoos. "I have stolen all ye tattoos, and now they are all mine! Miiiine, MIIIIIIIIINNNNNEEE!"

"You die, now!" Tattoo Guy shouted as he chases the short man out of his house, who was surprisingly fast on his short legs. Tattoo Guy tried to tackle him down, but the fat leprechaun simply bounced away right on his tricycle.

"You'll never catch me, lad!" He cackled away on his tricycle and drove down the street, until he got hit by a car and pound like a ball down the other direction.

"Oh you are not getting away from me!" He jumped in his car and chased the pouncing maniac through the small town of Gravity Falls. "Give me back my tattoos!" He poked his head out the car, only to hit his head by another car's side mirror.

And that is why you should never stick your head out of a moving vehicles, boys and girls.

He slowly pull his head back in and noticed the shorty pouncing right into Shop Thrifty. He parked right in front and looked around the store with an elderly woman at the counter.

"You!" shouted Tattoo Guy. "Where'd that chubby freak go!"

"Hey, that's not nice." said a couple of fat characters in the background.

The elderly woman adjusted her glasses. "Timmy, is that you?"

Tattoo Guy marched right to the counter and slammed his fist. "I'm looking for the fat shrimp that stole my tattoos!"

"Timmy, you're back from the dead?!" She smiled happily. "You can finally take out the trash, it's been twenty years."

Tattoo Guy grunted as he searches through the stores of old hand-me-downs and found a box of CDs.

As he digs though the box, Soos walked by and shook his head in pity.

"Sorry dude, no PC Rom game from that generation will work on today computers." He miserably looked at a CD of a small dog. "I guess your three adventures of getting lost and then finding your way back home will never be told again." A single teardrop ran down Soos's face. "But you'll always live in the deep parts of our memories which is opening up right now, unless they've never played this game."

Seeing that there was no sign of the man in with the CD box, Tattoo Guy looked around all the odd looking dolls with disturbing eyes, which he dimwittedly passed the leprechaun posing as one of the dolls.

"That there was a close-y." the fat leprechaun snickered to himself.

"Please buy me."

"Ah!" The leprechaun fell over by the talking doll next to him.

"Please, I only need to eat one child a week."

"There you are!" Tattoo Guy spotted him, but with the leprechaun's fat body, he cartoonishly performed a spin dashed and rolled out of the shop.

"Really Timmy? Racecars?" The old woman shook her head as Tattoo Guy chased after the leprechaun. "That's what killed you in the first place!"

" _Why does he want my tattoos?_ " Tattoo Guy thought as he pushed over anyone in his way, and who weren't already run over by the leprechaun. " _How can he roll like that? Who is he? What is his plan? Where is he going? What time is it? Which came first, chicken or the egg? Why did I want Tattoos in the first place?"_

His inner monologue was interrupted as he watches the leprechaun roll right into a brick wall and turned as flat as a pancake.

"Now I have you!" Tattoo Guy was about to body slam him, but the leprechaun had one more trick up his sleeve as he bounce up a few times and then hurdled himself right into Tattoo Guy's face and rolled away.

"Bwa ha ha ha! It's hopeless!" The Fate Leprechaun cackled as he enters the woods.

Tattoo Guy rubbed his face in pain, but was still determined to get his marks back, no matter what. "I'm coming for you!" He ran deep into the forest, but lost sight of the man he wants to repeatedly punch. "Where are you?"

The only thing he heard through the once warm summer forest was the laughter of the thief. "Throughout my generations, my clan had always worn green." Tattoo Guy quickly glanced around some moving branches. "Always wearing the same colored outfit, every day or so." He could have sworn he saw the shorty roll through some shrubs. "But now I can finally be different! I am no longer the fat leprechaun."

Right there, the leprechaun revealed himself to the Tattoo Guy. "I am now, the Fat Leprechaun with Tattoos!" With his newfound powers, the leprechaun grew a second left arm. "And now I shall destroy you!"

The shorty bounced around the trees at high speed and repeatedly attacked our hero from all corners.

"What are ye going to do now, what are ye doing to do now!" The Fat Leprechaun with Tattoos shouted with pure joy to see his victim suffer.

He was losing. Tattoo Guy couldn't even land a punch on him, let alone dodge the bombards of attacks. The short guy was too fast to see, too fast to punch, and too fat to fit in a size eight.

" _Why is the sky blue?_ " Tattoo Guy thought. " _How old is the universe? What am I going to have for dinner tonight? And why did I get my tattoos in the first place?_ "

And that's when it hit him, the moment when he realized what form of art he wanted to make of himself.

* * *

 **Flashback to 10 years ago**

There was Tattoo Guy, with his body clean from all his marks, looking through a magazine in his home. "I should get tattoos."

 **End Flashback**

* * *

The passion he felt back then flared up once more in his soul. "Rrrrrrraaaaaaaaahhhhhh!" One random punch had landed right in the face of the Fat Leprechaun with Tattoos.

"Nnnnnoooooooooooooooooo!" The leprechaun shouted in slow-motion as all the tattoos he'd stolen magically returned to Tattoo Guy. How? Magic, that's how.

"Yes!" Tattoo Guy shouted with pure joy as the leprechaun tumbled to the ground. "Now it's payback!" with a few random Gnomes in the background cheering him on, Tattoo Guy landed several more punches to the evil leprechaun.

"How? HOW!?" The Fat Leprechaun shouted as Tattoo Guy aimed a punch right to his face. "How can I be defeated by a …. A ….. tall person!?"

"How?" He grinned as he tightened his fist. "Because I got muscles!" Tattoo Guy landed his blow which exploded the Leprechaun into bits and pieces of those Lucky Charms knock-offs you see in grocery stores.

"Hooray!" All the Gnomes cheered as they collected the sugary non-actual marshmallows.

The day was saved, and now Tattoo Guy, with his marks right where he belongs, return to the town to continue his daily life of working and returning home, with his tattoos.

"…. Darn it! I still have this one tattoo from my ex!"

 **End of Chapter**

 **Afdyv'p Xasbkqrobp Qxibp lc x Lkb Mlrka Ald. Qebob, vlr objbjybo qeb qfqib klt.**


	69. Guide to Costumes

**Chapter 69** : Guide to Costumes

"And that is why you should never use sandpaper to write your school report on." Mabel happily said as she showed off her failed essay with a teacher note reading 'Why?!' on it and nothing else.

* * *

A montage of clips with Mabel doing random and some dangerous stuff played out as Mabel's same was repeated in different tones.

"Today, Mabel's Guide to Costumes!" Mabel shouted as she stands in her room. "It's finally October and today we are going to decide the final costume set of Halloween for me and my brother Dipper!" Mabel pulled Dipper into the screen, who's looking just as unamused as he always been when his sisters make these dumb videos.

"But first, the history of costumes."

"Don't take notes." Dipper added, but was pushed out of the way by Mabel.

"Let's get started!"

* * *

Pictures were shown of people dressed in costumes through the ages, which is only reaching to about the 70s. "It is said by experts that costumes have been around for millions of years, but only recently have they co-existed with mankind until about this awesome generation."

The next picture showed some old cheesy B-movie flick with a monster both Dipper and Wendy will laugh at.

"That is until the evil General Googly-Eye Mud King rose into power and commanded all costumes to stay away from people. That was the age of little dogs wearing costumes."

Then Mabel edit in some crayon drawn super hero. "Until the Awesome Captain Muscles Chief appeared and beat the Mud King forever, freeing all costume kind!"

The last picture showed a Halloween party. "To celebrate this heroic deed, Halloween was invented so that mankind and costume-kind can once again bond and live out the freedom that the amazing Captain Muscles have given us!"

"The mysteries of Gravity Falls has nothing on why you were never held bac-." Dipper said off screen right before being cut out.

* * *

The video then showed Mabel in town with her parents nearby. "So what have costumes done for humanity, besides helping us rot our teeth? Well there's a fine example right there!"

Mabel noticed a bank robbery across the street. "See those kitty cat masks those guys are wearing, they help make you rich and successful!"

Then some policemen more competent than Blubs and Durland tackled the crooks and beat them with their sticks.

"But sadly kitty cat masks suffer from prejudice against _the man_ and-"

"Mabel, honey! Now's not the time!" her mother shouted as she and her husband drag Mabel away from the scene as it gets more violent.

* * *

In the next scene, Mabel spoke with Dyami at his front door. "So, any suggestions for a Halloween costume for me?" Mabel squeal softly as she holds the camera as steady as her beating heart will allow.

Dyami scratched his chin, oblivious to Mabel's rosy cheeks. "Well it has to be something appropriate."

Mabel quickly wrote down 'Appropriate' on a sheet titled 'How to get Your Longest Crush on Record to Notice You'

"And you need something that doesn't look childish, since we're 13 now."

"Uh huh."

"And didn't you mention you and Dipper always do a pair costume?" Dyami asked.

"Yep!"

"Hmmmm." Dyami snapped his finger. "How about a Vampire and their victim! Or maybe a zombie and its victim! Or maybe an alien parasite and its victim! How about a poltergeist aaaaaaaand never mind."

* * *

Mabel was now filming Kimmy who was leaning on a tree near the woods.

"Kimmy, how do you feel about the accurate portrayal of ghost in the costume media?" Mabel asked with joy.

"Don't care." Kimmy responded without the slightest emotion.

"Come on, how about ghosts under a sheet? Don't they get you and your style?"

"Ha." She rolled her eyes. "And what about the other ghost costumes? Not based on blankets or deceased fictional characters."

"Glad you ask. You see we have …. Uhhh ….."

"Thought so."

* * *

Mabel was now in a classroom with Mr. Barney.

"Mr. Barney, what is your choice of costume this year."

"I'm an unsociable adult. What do you think?" Sadly his answer wasn't making Mabel understand that he wants nothing to do with costumes.

"I say be a frog. That way a beautiful princess will kiss you and see your true form."

"Then they'll rather the frog." Mr. Barney turned to his notes.

"Hey, don't be like that. Take Toby for example." Mabel showed Barney a picture of the town's worst reporter. "He'll make a great frog!"

Mr. Barney's eyes widened at the picture. "Wow, now I feel more confident in myself!" Mr. Barney grinned. "Just for that, I'm giving you an A+ for your report you wrote on sandpaper …. O.K., really, why!?"

* * *

Now there's the Guardian Fox, lounging in the sun.

"Come on, say something about dog costumes." Mabel urged the Fox to speak, but the mythical animal only opened one eye at the girl, and closed it.

"I know you can speak. Come on, speak girl! Speak!" Mabel then grabbed a hold of the fox's lip and started moving it. "I'm Miss Fox! I just have so many secrets and I eat bunnies because I hate them!"

Then the fox gave her the glare that reads 'you have committed blasphemy against me', which was enough for Mabel to cut the video.

* * *

Finally there was Beethoven, nervously sitting in Mabel's room, most likely mentally repeating 'Don't Panic' to himself.

"Now Beethoven." Mabel walked up to the boy and wrapped her arm around him, which is having the exact opposite reaction of calm. "You were once a failed bully to Dipper and now one of us!"

"Y-YES! One of … you … guys." Beethoven blurted out as Mabel swirled away.

"Now you sit in front of a live audience-" Of stuffed animals. "To tell us your plan for Halloween."

"M-My plan?!" Beethoven started shaking as he randomly guesses to himself if this could mean a date or now.

"Your plan ….. for what you will be for this Halloween!"

"You're boyf-" Beethoven quickly covered his mouth shut.

"My boy?!" Mabel asked, before gasping from realization.

" _Oh snap!"_ Beethoven shook as Mabel looked like she'd solved the case.

"You're going as my baby!?'

"Huh?"

"That is so perfect!" Mabel jumped up and down. "You'll be my son! Dyami can be the husband. And Dipper is the boring uncle!" Mabel repeatedly paced. "I'm going to need some grown up clothes and ….. I'm one step closer into becoming an adult." Mabel felt her head as she experience shell shocked form her first glimpse at high school life. "Cut the idea."

"Oh that's a relief." Beethoven sighs as he looks into the camera. "Is that camera on?"

"Don't worry, it's for no one." Dipper called out. "She just records these and then set them on that shelf."

Beethoven glanced at Mabel's video collection right when Mabel jumped in.

"And we are out of time! We'll continue when I find the perfect costume for our final Halloween of Trick-or-Treat. See ya all next time."

"Just a reminder!" Dipper called out again. "I have a somewhat image now. Don't pick anything that will make me look stupid."

"No promises."

 **End of Chapter**

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* * *

 **A/N:** Well folks, as of this date 3/23/18, I just want to share the current view count of this fanfiction. (100,561)

That's right, this fanfiction have reached over 100,000 views!

I would like to thank everyone for being so sad that Gravity Falls ended a couple years ago and is using this to fill the void until Infinity Train airs in 2019! But boy do I need take this story on a role. 2 years in and I am just getting started on October.

And I say it's just about time I do another request!

Hear that? I said **Request** right here!

If you don't remember, I made some changes to my original rules. Now they are...

\- Someone who once had a suggestion written can suggest another story now.

\- I will only decide one story at a time. After one is chosen, wait until I ask again.

\- Must be a one-shot or a short multiple series (ex: Guide To, Tutor Dipper, Storytime with Soos)

\- If I reject an idea, I do not need to go into full detail as to why (most likely it will conflict with future plans a.k.a. spoilers.)

\- Suggestions and discussions must take place through PM ONLY. Do not post in your reviews or it will be ignored. Sorry to anyone with no official account.

You have until April 1st to give your ideas. After that, I'm ignoring new ideas whether you or I like it or not.

And just for the record, I already have started on a chapter involving Wendy and the Dipper clones, and a April Fools one.


	70. Easter Egg

**Chapter 70:** Easter Egg

At a public gathering at Gravity Fall Square, all our favorite residents were looking up on a platform to see their police force giving a speech.

"Well we knew this day was coming." Sheriff Blubs said as he tilted his hat. "But boy I am nowhere near ready to say it."

"I-I think I am." Deputy Durland said as he took the mic. "All of you lovely people are probably wondering what kind of friendship we have." He gently smiled at Blubs. "All these years we were never apart."

"E-Especially off duty." Blubs gained the courage to speak out. "And since it's just the two of us, we don't really hang out with anyone else."

"Which spreads all kind of them rumors." Durland said as he waves his fingers. "Like that we're aliens here to eat all your socks."

"I started that one!" shouted Robbie from the crowd.

"But we are here to set things straight." Blubs said as he and Durland faced their audience.

"Our friendship." They both said together. "Is not just two buddies hanging out, but our bond reaches to the stars." They looked at one another and nodded. "People of Gravity Falls, we are …."

.

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"We interrupt this program to bring you, 'Courage the Cowardly Dog Show'! Starring Courage, the Cowardly Dog!"

"Abandon as a pup, we was found my Muriel, who lives in the middle of Nowhere, with her husband, Eustace Bagge."

"Gaaah!"

"But creepy stuff happens in Nowhere. It's up to Courage to save his new home."

"Stupid Dog! You made me look bad! Ooooh Gagoo Gaboo Gaboogah!"

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!"

Created by John R. Dilworth

* * *

 **Easter Egg**

Written By: Me

Storyboard By: There is no storyboard. I just start writing and leave quick notes for when I need to stop for now.

Directed By: Me again. Hello.

On a bright Sunday Morning in the Middle of Nowhere, Courage was out and about around the old house, sniffing for any new scents.

"Hmmmm." His curiosity was focused around the chicken coop. He poked his head inside the empty coop and found a single egg in the nest. "Huh?" Courage scratched his head as he takes a closer look. The egg was no ordinary egg at all, but a very colorful Easter Egg.

"Yay!" Courage cheered as he take the egg from the nest and bring it inside thought the kitchen door.

"Rrrrr. Darn weather." Eustace said as he reads the newspaper. With one glance, he noticed the colorful egg Courage was brining. Normally he would grunt and throw in an insult, but the site of the egg gave him a quick flashback of a happy time. "Perfect!" He stood up and swipes the egg away. "Stupid dog actually done good work."

"Huh?" Courage scratched his head as Eustace place the egg on the table. "A new buddy to torment you!" Eustace laughed as he takes a wooden spoon and crack the Waster egg, which revealed the content of the decorative egg, the yoke.

"Wha?" Eustace rubbed his head and growled. "Stupid Dog, you brought in a bad egg!" He took out that old tribal mask of his and scared the poor dog. Courage runs out of the kitchen as Eustace laughs, only to be hit on the head by his wife, Muriel. "What did I do?"

But unbeknownst to them; someone, or something, was spying the couple through the window. Something dark. Something sinister, something … furry.

Later that night, Courage was sleeping in the bed with Eustace and Muriel, until the slumbering farmer kicked him off in his sleep.

"Rrrrrr." Courage growled annoyingly to himself from the floor, but shrugged it off just like Eustace's other antics and decided to grab a cup of milk from the kitchen. "Ah." Courage finished the refreshing drink and closed the refrigerator door.

"Hello there, dear chap." Spoke a sudden being from behind the fridge's door.

This sudden greeting in the dark kitchen passed midnight was just the right amount of terror to give Courage another scream the reached across the house. He quickly turned the lights on and found no trace of the intruder.

Shacking in fear, Courage rushed upstairs to alert his owners of the unknown threat. The two elders awoke to see Courage babble and shape shapeshift into a few monster forms which they never really understood.

"You don't say." Eustace on the other hand seemed to have an idea of what Courage was implying. "I say we should make you sleep outside!" Never mind.

Courage was kicked out the front door, leaving the poor dog scared and nervous for his family. He looks through the living room window to see this intruder he was in the kitchen.

"I'm right here, friend."

Courage screamed again and turned to see this new monster, a bunny.

"Huh?" Courage calmed down and saw the fluffy and pink rabbit with big blue eyes staring at him.

"I didn't mean to scare you before. I was hiding from the coyotes." He shook his whiskers as he spoke in a soft and yet unsettling voice. "Coyotes are mean. Aren't they?"

Courage stepped back and nodded in agreement.

"And I see coyotes aren't the only mean thing, are they?" the Rabbit hopped once and Courage stepped back once again. "That mean old man just loves to torture you, don't you?"

Courage was still nervous around this rabbit, but what he said wasn't false.

"Scaring you, tossing you to the side, mocking you, and you put through all that."

Now all the warning signals were running through his minds at the rabbit's knowledge.

"Wouldn't it just be simple and peaceful, to just do away with him?"

Courage just stood there, thinking very carefully to the rabbit's words.

"And it's not even that hard to do." The Rabbit groomed his ear. "And there are plenty of ways to get rid of him. I can show you, I can teach you, I can lead you to peace."

Courage rubbed his chin. "Interesting offer. Can I think it over?"

"Why certainly. Just remember..." The Rabbit hopped back. "Every day, that man sucks the joy out of you, every day for your decade lifespan." The rabbit hopped away into the dark night of the Middle of Nowhere.

As soon as Courage was sure he was gone, he immediately ran right up the gutter pole of the house and climbed into the attic window. He frantically pressed the keyboard of his computer in desperate need of help.

" _So a cute wibble bunny rabbit is acting just like the devil himself. Well for starters I suggest deleting some certain data you keep not well hidden._ "

Courage sheepishly laughed himself.

" _Well I would suggest you ignore him, but if you do that in a horror genre, you'll bore the audience. But I have another solution that will solve this problem._ "

"Yaaaay!" Courage quietly cheered.

" _All you have to do is-_ " And much to Courage's luck, the computer shut off.

Courage gasped as he looked at the outlet and saw the Bunny Rabbit, nibbling at the wires.

"Courage, might I ask what you are doing?"

Courage jumped from this chair and crawled back as the bunny slowly hopped.

"If you seek knowledge, why not just ask me? I am well, a smarty pants as you call it." The rabbit hopped again. "And the nibbling of the sparkling string gave me a good suggestion of how to do away with the old man."

He can't take this, there is no other choice. Courage crashed right through the door and into his owners' bedroom.

"What the-" Eustace and Muriel awoke as Courage picked the two up from bed.

"Courage, what have gotten into you?!" the shocked and worried woman asked as Eustace snarled.

"Stupid Dog, how'd you get in?!"

Courage turned to the door, but gasped and as the bunny was standing right there.

"I don't understand." The rabbit tilted his head as he ears flop to the floor. "I see why the elder woman, but not the man." He lowered his head to the floor. "Another thing I don't quite know, what are you protecting them from?"

Courage screamed again, but then noticed that the rabbit have vanished. Thinking quickly, Courage ran out of the room and into the living room for the door, but there stood the rabbit, nibbling on the carpet.

"If you wish to go on a midnight stroll, why not take the woman and leave the bad man here. I will take good care of him."

The panic dog glance around and decide to run to the kitchen, there he found the rabbit again.

"Maybe you just hate baby birds, like the mean old man." The rabbit rubbed his face. "I saw what he did, did you the egg."

Courage then ran into the basement, and saw the rabbit once more. "What did the baby bird ever done to you, old man?" the rabbit asked Eustace, who's only concern was the annoying dog. "Why wouldn't you let the baby bird spread its wings, why?"

Flight or fight. Those were the only two options his beating heart was telling him, and flight was no longer a choice. He was a dog, dogs were meant to be guards to their owners, right to the teeth.

"Grrrrr!" Courage threw all his cards down and dropped the old couple and dashed right at the rabbit, wherever he is now. "Ahhh!" Courage whelped quickly to see no trace of the entity again. He doesn't know why, he doesn't know how, but he has no time to ponder. He needs to save his family, a family that is no longer there.

"Ahhhhh!" Courage screamed in the empty basement with no sign of Eustace or Muriel. He was alone now, he failed to save them. And now, it's just him. Him and him alone, again.

"You're not quite alone, puppy." Courage turned to see the rabbit, giving him that still stare. "Why do you protect him? Is it because the women cares for him?" The rabbit tilted his head. "I've seen many sacrifices; sacrifices to save lives, wellbeing, succession, even to false gods." The rabbit began grooming himself. "I say, if this is out of the question, that perhaps to make the mean old man go away, you make the kind old lady go away too."

He was without words, thoughts, or screams left. Courage slowly backed away as the rabbit moved closer and closer.

"What's the matter, are you scared?"

Whether it was all in his head or reality, the rabbit appears to be growing larger and larger.

"I really don't see why you should be scared of me?"

An eye started to twitch as the rabbit licked his lips.

"I'm just a cute and cuddly bunny, a bunny that leaves pretty eggs for all the children."

Is hears began to shiver as the fur started falling out.

"Eggs that should make people happy, not miserable."

The Rabbit's paws started changing into claws.

"So like I say before, don't be scared ….. because you're on Scare Tactics!"

As a record halts, the light turned on to reveal not just the normalized bunny, but all of Courage's friends he made thought his entire life, shouting 'Surprise' and brining in cake that reads 'Happy Birthday'!

"I'm sorry, Courage, but we couldn't resist." Muriel said giggling, safe and sound. "It was all fun and game, and Eustace even picked out your favorite cake."

She gestured to Eustace, who was just looking away with his arms folded.

"Blah blah blah." He mumbled to himself.

"He's not really that bad at all." The rabbit said as the Hunchback walked next to him.

"But he is …. Bald."

"And boy was that some surprised." Charlie the Mouse said as a robot claw appeared from the basement exit.

" _I'm here too_." Robot Randy said.

"So are we." Shaggy said with Scooby by his side.

"Reah! Re he he he!"

The Space Ducks spoke up. "And we also want to thank you for your help."

Several of the friends including Bigfoot, Shadow, and the Raccoons nodded.

Then the fortune teller, Shirley, pulled the cake closer to Courage. "Now blow out the candles so I can go back to bed."

"Yeah, what she said." Eustace said, still looking away.

Courage looked at all his friends and family and prepared himself to blow out the candles. But, as he was about to put the small flames down, something crossed his mind. "Wait a minute?" Courage looked back at the audience. "Who are you two?"

Courage point to Shaggy and Scooby.

Everyone looked at the two, looking just as concern as Courage.

"Well then." The Rabbit spoke up. "I guess that marathon to see who is more cowardly was not canon at all."

In an instant, Muriel, Eustace, and everyone else in that room shriveled out and started oozing blood from their mouths.

"AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!" Courage gave a blood curdling scream as the Rabbit slowly turned to Courage.

"I guess you don't like listening to a cute bunny like me." His hideous form returned as he is now near inches away from Courage. "I guess dogs aren't as different as coyotes as I thought."

Courage let out another scream of terror as the shadow of the bunny cast over him.

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* * *

"And that is what our bond is." Durland said to the crowd.

"With all details necessary to leave no questions at all." Blubs said as everyone cheered. "Sure am glad we finally settled that one."

"Uh huh." Durland nodded. "Now everyone knows what kind of friendship we have. Want to get ice cream?"

"Quit reading my mind."

 **End of Chapter**

 **Exsb x exmmv Bxpqbo xka Xmofi Cllip! Ylv fp qefp axv dlfkd ql dbq tbfoa.**


	71. Hunting Me

Chapter 71: Hunting Me

"One, one just had to slip away."

In the cold forest of Gravity Falls, Wendy Corduroy walked down a path, dressed in the same survival outfit from Weirdmageddon.

"They all came from me, and one used that hawk eye she inherited to avoid Soos's strike."

Autumn have arrived and now the leaves that flourished the forest now fall and crackle under Wendy's boots.

"I've seen what you've done." Wendy glared at her path for vengeance. "You've ruined my name, my family, my dignity."

"Don't sweat it, Wendy. I already explained it to your entire school." Suddenly Soos popped out of nowhere. "But now all those teenagers want to make copies for the exact same reason as you. Can't really blame them for it."

Wendy flinched at Soos. "Soos, I know you're my boss now, but you're kind-a ruining my moment here."

"Oh, sorry." Soos slipped away as Wendy continued her path.

"Your face is the same as mine, but yet it is a copy. Just a mere copy." She heard a twig snap and quickly aimed her squirt gun towards the direction, only to see an owl with a Maraca.

"A copy that wants you gone, and replaced." Wendy looked towards the dusk sun that shall soon be hidden and the night shall reign once more. "I brought her into this world, and I am the one who is going to take her out."

Then Wendy broke from her tension and blurted out with laughter. "Man, somebody should make a cheesy movie out of this."

"Right on it." Soos said with a camera. "Wendy Corduroy, Master Hunter. Coming on now!"

Wendy rubbed her chin. "Soos, do I need to finish High School to start my own T.V. show?"

"Probably." Soos shrugged, which Wendy really disproved of. "And since those T.V. producers are like devils wanting your soul, you probably want to start your own MeBox Channel. Wait, MeBox wants your soul too and replace it with their opinion. Never mind."

"Typical." Wendy sighs.

"But I'm just going to keep rolling. Mr. Pines said that kids fighting can sell."

"Roll away." Wendy turned back to the road as Soos films her epic journey. "Wendy Flippin' Corduroy, on the trail to destroy my copy that got me a week of detention, threw all my clothes in the mud, and got me a date with every single ex I had on the same date, including Robbie." She quickly leaned on a tree from a sudden noise.

"Thankfully I stopped her before she could send that fake love letter to Dipper, and soon I'm gonna-?

"Which one!?"

Wendy jumped back from shock from the sudden appearance of Dipper Clone 3 and 4 looking very excited.

"Is that love letter for me!?" asked 4 as he paces in place before 3 pushed him over.

"No, she's mine!"

The two started fighting and tumbled away, leaving Wendy confused as she shook her head. "Are you really sure you don't want me to melt them too?" Wendy asked Soos, which he responds by shaking the camera no.

"I'm telling ya, Wendy. They are going to be important. Like say to help save the world again, or maybe for a really good joke."

"Whatever. I got a bigger fish to fry." Wendy ignored the extra-creepy editions of Dipper and continued her hunt.

"Ya know, I should be narrating for now on." Soos said as he followed Wendy through the forest.

"Oh boy, so now we begin the awesome adventure of Wendy the Warrior! … Warrior cool with you? Maybe something more original like …. Wendy the Wrestler. Well actually the W is silent. Wait wait, Wendy the Wombat."

"The heck's a wombat?" Wendy asked.

"I dunno." Soos shrugged. "Maybe … Wendy the Waster."

"No." Wendy bluntly spoke as she continued her hunt.

"We'll work on the title later. Now time for an awesome montage of Wendy!"

The video cut to some clips edited by Soos of Wendy in the wilderness. With each action the lumberjack girl did, Soos added some flashy titles.

Wendy cutting through low branches. 'SLICE AND DICE'

Wendy jumping over a ledge. 'REACH FOR THE SKY'

Wendy spear fishing. 'BULLSEYE'

Wendy looking at a deer and her calf. 'DON'T KILL BAMBI'S MOM!'

"Don't worry, I didn't shoot." Wendy said as she looks on the ground. "Soos, be vewy vewy quiet, I'm hunting clones."

"What was that, I couldn't he-" Why Soos decide to shout while he was only a few feet from the girl was beyond her, but she quickly covered his mouth and motioned him to keep it down. They crawled through the shrubs and found the Wendy clone with a 5 written on her cap.

"There's the filthy little-"

"Sssssh! No bad words." Soos whispered. "You need to say something action-y. Like call her a Wendy rip-off. Or wait, I'll look up some foreign restaurant with a name sounding way too similar to yours. Or a mix of yours and another restaurant chain's name."

Wendy covered Soos's mouth as they watch the paper-print copy just lounging around.

She slowly crawls towards the clone as Soos films and quietly narrates.

"Can you folks at home still hear me? I'm going to guess so since I don't want to talk loud. Now Wendy is crawling through the bushes there which hopefully is not poison oak. Oops, she made a noise, don't worry. Clone just ignored it. Now Wendy is hiding behind a paper birch tree. Wait, they're from the other side of America, and so are fireflies … well Gnomes lives here and a whole lot of other weird stuff; so hey, why not. Uh oh, Wendy snapped a twig and the clone is looking rather suspicious. Hey, Wendy did a bird call, now the clone think it's a bird and continued being lazy. Now Wendy is going for the kill and oops, looks like the clone set up a tree net. I guess it's up to Soos the Super to woah, ahhh! Heh, looks like I got trapped in a tree net too."

Wendy was completely caught off guard by the sudden trap that she dropped her squirt gun as the net dragged her up to the tree.

With a smile, the Clone causally walked over to the squirt gun and smashed it by violently throwing it at a large rock. The clone then curtsy to the young Corduroy and dashed off.

"Did my clone just do something girly?" Wendy took out a knife and cut herself free. "She is so dead." Wendy ran after the blasphemous being, leaving behind Soos.

"Hey, I still have the camera here …. Eh, I'm sure people will eat up the 'what if' ending or something. Like that anime with giant robots that only kids can drive … I still don't understand ending till this day."

Back with Wendy, she has lost sight of her prey, but from years of survival guide had taught her anything, it's how to hunt for food, or in this case, revenge.

From examining some low broken branches on the trees, she followed down a path and noticed an ant colony once covered the flipped rock next to it.

"You're definitely not the real me." With a smile, Wendy moved forward until she heard some leaves cracking. She quickly ducked and waited until she saw some shrubs moving. "Bingo." She smiled as she slowly approaches her target.

She lay their quietly for the slightest movement. Quietly, silently, …. Until….

"Boosh!" Wendy lunge at a head poking up and tackled her prey to the ground. "I got you now …. Dipper clone." She miserably stares down at Dipper 4, who red face could tell he wasn't scared, at least for his life.

"So … is this where we kiss?" Dipper 4 nervously asked as he received his answer in the form of Wendy standing up and walking away.

"How about me?" Dipper 3 asked before being pushed away by her.

"Ugh, the real Dipper wasn't like this." Wendy rolled her eyes as the clones caught up to her.

"Well we can be better than the old Dipper." Dipper 3 said as 4 held up a calendar.

"We even set up a schedule on who you'll date for a weekly basis."

Wendy answer to that was crumbling the calendar and tossing it away. "Look, I just want to-"

"Hey hey! Down here!" Wendy and the clones looked down to see some cartoonish-looking bug with the calendar next to him. "I'm Larry the Litterbug! I'm here to teach you the errors of littering by singing and talking down to you like a kindergartner who can't even tie their own sh-"

Squash

Wendy strolled on by, with the clones still following her.

"I am not dating any of you! Sheesh!" She turned to the two with fury. "Look, pushing that age difference to the side, I know Dipper's awkward, even a bit over the 'Just growing up' phase. But you two...!"

As Wendy was shouting at the two, Dipper 4 noticed something behind Wendy and nudged at 3.

"I mean a list where you alternate with each other to date me? That is so messed up that I-"

"Wendy, look out!" The Dipper clones pulled Wendy to the side, narrowing dodging a fallen tree. Wendy looked at the tree in shocked at how close it was.

"Woah, you two like, totally saved me."

The clones sheepishly smiled as they prepare a reward kiss, but Wendy looked at the end of the tree to see that it was nothing natural.

"You….."

The clones held that kissing face as Wendy marched towards her prey, Wendy Clone 5.

The real coolest person on the planet drew out her hatchet and glared. "You are going down. Me Clone."

"Hey hey, stop!" Wendy and the clone turned to see Soos's triumphed return. "I got this super cool name for you, clone. Wentwo!"

"Wentwo?" Wendy asked. "Don't name something you're going to kill, Soos." Wendy adjusted her cap and turn to her enemy. "Especially after what she did with my name, isn't that right you good for nothing ….. Oh come on!"

Wentwo took that short time to slip away from Wendy, yet again. Hearing a twig snap, Wendy followed the sound and noticed the clone running away.

Despite being a paper copy, this clone was nearly as fast as the original, and maybe more cunning than the original thought. The clone pulled back on some pine branches to hit Wendy, tried tossing some rocks at a beehive, and even risk herself to get close to a venomous snake.

Wendy was more than ready to handle some simple obstacles such as those. She even grabbed the snake by the head and threw it towards the clone, a sight the Dipper clones wished they saw.

Their chase finally came to an end as Wendy and Wentwo reached a rocky cliff with a river at the bottom.

Wentwo looked down at the long height and stepped back.

"Nowhere to run." Wendy said as she and the clone looked face to face. "You've messed me up so bad this week." Wendy cracked her knuckles. "Have any last words?"

Wentwo said nothing. With a deep breath, she posed and motioned her fingers to come forward.

"Cornered mouse." Wendy smiled with excitement. She dashed at Wentwo and throw a punch, only for the clone to duck and punch Wendy in the stomach.

The original stepped back from the pain as Wentwo tackled her to the ground. Wendy elbowed Wentwo's face and freed herself and the two tumbled close to the edge of the cliff. They narrowly came close to falling down as Wentwo kneed Wendy in the thigh and stood right up and stomped on Wendy's head.

Wendy then pushed Wentwo's foot to throw the clone off balance and stood right up to grab Wentwo's shoulder. "Ya know, this was a long day." With a devilish smile, she threw the clone with all her might. "Why not take a dip!"

But right as Wentwo was about to fall, she grabbed Wendy's ankle and the two fell. The real Wendy managed to grab a hold of the ledge, but the clone still held on.

"Hey, let go!" Wendy shook and kicked the clone, but Wentwo still held on. "Rrrrh!" With the weight of the clone, Wendy was having a harder time holding on.

Wentwo noticed Wendy's hand slipping and smiled. Acting quickly, she tried climbing up Wendy, but the girl was not ready to face defeat. With a free hand, Wendy punched the clone in the face, causing her to fall off her for good.

The punch however was a double bladed sword as the real Wendy finally lost her grip.

"Ahh-"

But was then caught by to pairs of hands. She looked up into the faces of her heroes, the Dipper clones.

"Rip-off Dippers?"

"Actually you can call me Tracey." Dipper 3 said.

"And Quattro right here." Dipper 4 said.

"I also saved you." Soos said from behind. "Actually I was has holding these two guys still, now way they can save you with those noodle paper arms." Wendy climbed up to see Soos holding onto the clones legs. "Good thing paper logic isn't working right now."

Wendy looked down at the river and saw no sign of her clone. "It's all over….."

"Real shame though." Soos said. "I mean Wentwo is a really cool name, and so original. It was something I never thought of before, or anyone else."

Wendy paid little thought to Soos's creativity as she turned to the dorks. "Well, you helped saved my….." The clones were making that kissing face again. "Uhhh …. how much water will melt you?"

"Probably a small amount will do." they said in union.

Wendy rubbed her head. "And kisses can sometime have ….. well spit…. so ….."

Both clones' eyes opened wide from shock. "We'll think of something eventually." and then they walked away.

"That was a close one." Wendy sigh with relieve as she wiped her forehead. "So you said you set everyone straight on this?"

"Yep." Soos said, before receiving call. "Hey Melody … or really … I'll see if the fire department can help." Soos hung up.

"My fellow classmates made clones?" Wendy asked with no wonder.

"Your fellow classmate made clones and boy the parents sound angry."

And so Soos and Wendy traveled back to down, but down at the river, at the very bottom, there stood a tree with broken branches, and Wentwo walking away. The clone looked up at Wendy, staring at her with an evil smile.

End of Chapter

* * *

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Shout out to Finnjr63 for artwork he made for me on deviantart called 'I Recognize That Voice'


	72. Temptation

**Chapter 72** : Temptation

"Well bro, here we are." Grunkle Stan stood in the desert as twilight cover the once warm wasteland. "We are close to the kids, and soon we will ship off straight back home." Stan looked to the ground as his brother Ford looked concern.

"Hard decision, isn't it?" Ford folded his arms.

"Easy for you to say. You're not like me." Stan sigh. "I want to make it to Wendy's party after how much she preached to the sky about driving when she struck teenagehood." Stan took out his wallet and showed Ford a picture of the kids. And I want to make a quick stop to Piedmont to see the kids and our baby brother, who may or may not be the kids gramps. I dunno why I said that, just go with it." He gently placed the photo nice and secure in his wallet. "And yet there's a calling, a calling I am all too familiar with."

"And I should have recognized the signs earlier." Ford stood besides his conflicted brother. "Perhaps if the Science Fair incident never happened, I would have realize and helped you."

"No changing the past." Stanley looked ahead. "Brother, taser me."

"You sure about this?" Ford asked with concern. "Your heart may not handled it."

"I eat ice cream for dinner and fought a hoard of zombies, my heart can take it." Stan turned to his brother. "But it cannot take that." He pointed ahead. "If I let it get a hold of me, there is no turning back … you're aware I'm talking about Las Vegas, right?"

"Yes Stan, I can see the flashing lights." Ford gave him a half-lite stare as Stanley drools over the alluring city of riches and loss. "And you know what, I will taser you. Just so we can see the kids and DON'T YOU DARE RUN OFF!" Ford immediately dashed after Stanley and tackled him to the ground. "I didn't let you drive all the way across the country like a raging maniac just so you can gamble all that gold the Atlantians gave you!"

"But it's a gamble, Stanford! You don't even know the thrill it has." Stanley tried to wiggle his way out. "I played Geeks, Nerds, and More … Japanese Cartoon Nerds to save your life, let me have this!"

"It's a city with nothing but gambling and casinos! We have a casino near Gravity Falls off the highway, it's the same thing!" Ford tried holding his brother in a neckhold, but Stanley stomped on his foot.

"It's not just casinos, Sixer! There's babes in revealing outfits and parents allowing their children to walk pass them!"

"That is no excuse to … wait what?" Ford asked as Stanley stopped.

"Yeah, that happens and …. O.K., that is really messed up after thinking it over." He turned back to Las Vegas and looked at it in a new light. "And there's plenty of people in costumes who will do who knows what …. And some fat guys handing out … wow, that place really is messed up." Stan's eyes widened with wisdom. "Ford … I did it! I overcame my temptation!"

"That's great Stan, now let's go before the police force recognize your car." Ford gestured to the Stanley Mobile.

And so Stanley Pines vanquished his inner demon as they drive towards California, their next destination. They drove into the sunset in the Nevada desert to a bright future, free from tempt-

"Area 51!" shouted Ford as he leaped out the car door.

"Oh no you don't!" Stanley shouted as he drives after the space geek off road.

 **End of Chapter**

 **Vlr exsb kl fabx elt irzhv Pqxkibv obxifwba elt jbppba rm qeb mixzb fp. F hfa vlr klq, F txp qebob ybclob. Texq tbob qelpb mxobkqp qefkhfkd, xka fq txp kbxoiv jfakfdeq!**


	73. Fanmail

**Chapter 73:** Fanmail

(This show was broadcasted in front of a live stuffed animal audience)

"Hellllo People!" Mabel greeted the viewer as she sits at a table in her room with a Stuffed Rhino and a Stuffed Lion. "You are in for a great treat today." She picks up a pillow case and empty a pile of letters on the table. "Today, we are going to read fanmail, or should I say I." Mabel folded her arms. "Because apparently Dipper has no need to comment because apparently these videos are for no one, apparently. …. Let's start off! Apparently."

Mabel opened up the first letter. "Dear Mabel, Thaaaaat's Me." She pointed to herself. "Stella asks: 'How do I make my hair be just like yours. It's amazing!'"

"Well I won't deny how fabulous my hair looks." Mabel flapped her hair out, which got into her mouth. "Blah blah." She spit out some hair and then smiled at the camera. "But believe me, you shouldn't try to be me, you need to try and be YOU!" She leaned towards the. "You are you, believe in yourself! You exist!"

She sits back and opened the next letter. "Our next letter is from Dave. He writes: "Can I be ya gal?'"

"Oh you …." Mabel giggled as she waved her hand. "Sorry, but I am setting a new record on my longest crush who has yet to notice me ….. I really need to have an actual friendship with him which includes multiple interests and activities instead of pulling a Wendip." She tossed the letter away.

"Third one's the charm!" Mabel opened a letter with a scent of lemons. "Yummy." She opened it up and read the content. "Hey, you're awesome and need a coupon for lemons!" She took out the coupon and jumped for joy.

"Now for the fourth!" Mabel held up her four fingers and read the next letter. "Dear Mabel, why is your brother so super dorky."

Mabel was then interrupted by a someone knocking. "Mabel, I heard my name and now I want to be part of this so you won't record anything false about me."

"That's your opinion, Dipper." Mabel took the camera away from the door. "Dipper so dorky because we were born during the visit of the Dork Comet! The Dork Comet came into our hospital room and enchanted Dipper with the Gift of Dorky-ness. I was immune, because I'm Mabel!" Mabel held up a crayon drawing of Dipper as a Super Hero. "Every half moon, Dipper's dorky powers transform him into Dorky Dipper! Dorky Dipper fights crime at night by boring them to death with his homework game, awkward speeches, and sweating!"

"I heard that, Mabel!"

Mabel looked at the door with slight irritation. "We'll be right back after these messages."

* * *

"Alright, I think I got everything." Jersey Devil was in the forest, packing his suitcase. "I wrote a letter to Carla that I'm 'On a business trip", set up my travel plan, and I'm packing Demon Donuts."

The Jersey Devil held up a box reading 'Demon Donuts'

"Demon Donuts, get them while they're sinful ….. They're catchy slogan still doesn't hides their mediocre taste."

* * *

"Welcome back!" Mabel smiled as she held up the last letter. "This one is a very special letter, it comes from ….. GHODXZLIPBCUNREVMQ … I think this person needs to be taught the alphabet." She opened the letter. 'Dear Mabel, thank you for being awesome and the enemy of purple. We were wondering if you will like to inform a Banana Tree that plants are an illusion.'

Mabel glanced at the camera and back to the letter. "Whaaa?" She read the letter closely. "I … I don't know what this is." Feeling very confused, Mabel set the letter down and went to the next one. "This one is from ….. The Trapizoid Earth Society?" Mabel skimmed through the letter and raised an eyebrow in confusion. "Even I know the Earth is a ball." Mabel threw that letter out and went to the next one. "I am the only one that exists and my brain is in a fish bowl." Mabel tossed that and grabbed the other. "Cold medicine invented colds." Rinse and repeat. "Flash animation sees the future." Rinse and repeat. "I was reincarnated from a secretary bird." Rinse and repeat. "Pineapples doesn't go on pizza, but pizza goes on pineapples!?"

Mabel was about to maul that last letter, but stopped herself. "Wait, I agree with that last one."

"Alright, Mabel. What was that all about?" Dipper said from the other side of the door.

"I …. I dunno." Mabel laid down and felt her head. "Next week …. We'll do something."

 **End of Chapter**

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	74. Fire the Cannons 2

**Spoilers to 'Lost Legends'**

 **Chapter 74** : Fire the Cannons 2

In the Pines Residence Living Room, Dipper was trying to read a book as Mabel was gossiping on her phone.

"Really, Candy? Pacifica played some shooting game the entire time? Despite whatever she has said about that one time she helped you out in that online game? And good with puns!? That is so gold!"

Dipper sigh as his sister's glee disrupted the imagined world his book brought him. "Mabel, can you take that call somewhere …. Wait a minute." Dipper put the book down and walked to Mabel. "Is that a cellphone?"

"No, it's a block of cheese." Mabel stuck her tongue out. "Jealous?"

"Mostly confused. When did you get a phone?" Dipper tilt his head. "I know you were complaining about wanting a phone ever since we got home."

Mabel only shrugged. "I'm pretty sure you're full of baloney." Mabel tilted forward and sniffed Dipper. "Did you eat a baloney sandwich?"

"First of all, yes. Second of all, that's creepy. Third, I know you said that."

"Well I remember Pacifica texting me about that second hug she gave you." Mabel looked at him with her eyebrows jumping.

"Second hug?" Dipper asked as he slightly blushes.

"Don't you remember? Pacifica had that wrinkle and asked some face stealing demon for help, which he took my face when we walked in." Mabel pulled her face. "Then you two snuck into some black market for all the paranormal monsters and then that face guy took your face and Pacifica saved the day!" Mabel held up a magazine of Pacifica smiling while covered in trash. "And she called Grunkle Ford hot. Boy would Wendy laugh at that one!"

* * *

"T-That guy's like a hundred, man!" Wendy bursts with laughter as a embarrassed Pacifica snarled at her.

"All I said he was hot! That's all! What do you think I'll do, lie awake at night thinking about him!?"

(Later)

"Ew, you call that a hat?" Pacifica looked at a magazine with disgust as she lays in bed. "What was I talking to Wendy about before? …. When is Dipper going to get a cellphone?"

* * *

Dipper pondered as he rests his large head on his hand. "Yeah, I think I remember. Do you also recall that time when we jumped into a comic book?"

"That was so much fun!" Mabel jumped for joy, before a horrific memory returned from the depths of her subconscious. "Ew, Japanese-comic Gideon!"

It was Dipper's turn to have a laugh at his sibling. "What's wrong, wasn't his face _hot_?"

"So was that water fountain!" Mabel felt her face, but then moved her fingers to show an eye. "And you were in a dress."

"Next memory." Dipper walked around. "Remember after Weirdmageddon you fell into that portal?"

"Oh yeah, then I met a bunch of me and learn a valuable lesson about not being so selfish."

Dipper smile as he took out his Pinetree Journal. "Thanks for the gift." Dipper playfully punched her arm. "How did we not mention those adventures until now?"

Mabel shrugged. "Yeah. It's like it all suddenly happened a short while ago, which technically it already did. Next thing you know is that Beethoven, Dyami, Jessica, and Kimmy never even existed."

Their trip down memory lane was interrupted by their folks marching downstairs. "I'm telling you, I saw a ghost! G-H-O-S-T!" Shouted Mrs. Pines. "Who ya gonna call? …. Someone!"

When the parents left, Kimmy slowly raised her head from the floor. "This moving in thing was a bad idea."

Mabel then had a stroke of genius. "Spruce up your place to be the best crib EVER!?"

"...Crib?"

"Just go with the current flow." Dipper informed the ghost.

"I was back on the internet." Kimmy narrowed her eyes. "No, I will not." She slowly descends back into the basement.

"I wonder what the Grunkles are up to?" Mabel asked.

"Where'd that question come from?" asked Dipper.

"I don't know!?" shouted Mabel as she panics. "I wasn't even thinking of it! What's going on!?"

* * *

"I swear, Jersey Devil! We ran into another Jersey Devil as kids!" Ford was on a street in some location near a familiar town, talking to the demon on a payphone. "It was much larger than you, more frightening! And ….. Was defeated far more easily than you. But I am just calling you because I just remember it and it goes against our entire-"

"Ford, no phone like that works anymore." Stanley said to his thirty years behind brother. "It's all cell phones now."

Ford looked at the old phone and hung up. "I'm confused, Stan."

"So am I." Stanley rubbed his head. "I'm pretty sure Wendy's mom died. Why am I having a feeling I last saw her near that bottomless pit? Eh, probably nothin'."

* * *

"I never liked Bill anyway." one of Bill's henchmen from the Nightmare realm spoke. "Why were we crying anyway?"

* * *

"Honey, did I ever mentioned during the end of this summer that I literally won you in a competition?" Mr. Northwest said to his wife.

"Nope."

"O.K. Let's continue to grovel."

 **End of Chapter**

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